3 things I learned while my plane crashed | Ric Elias

1,604,842 views ・ 2011-04-26

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Imagine a big explosion as you climb through 3,000 ft.
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Imagine a plane full of smoke.
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Imagine an engine going clack, clack, clack.
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It sounds scary.
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Well, I had a unique seat that day.
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I was sitting in 1D.
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I was the only one who could talk to the flight attendants.
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So I looked at them right away,
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and they said, "No problem. We probably hit some birds."
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The pilot had already turned the plane around,
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and we weren't that far.
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You could see Manhattan.
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Two minutes later,
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three things happened at the same time.
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The pilot lines up the plane with the Hudson River.
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That's usually not the route.
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(Laughter)
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He turns off the engines.
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Now, imagine being in a plane with no sound.
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And then he says three words.
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The most unemotional three words I've ever heard.
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He says, "Brace for impact."
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I didn't have to talk to the flight attendant anymore.
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(Laughter)
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I could see in her eyes, it was terror.
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Life was over.
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Now I want to share with you three things I learned about myself that day.
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I learned that it all changes in an instant.
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We have this bucket list,
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we have these things we want to do in life,
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and I thought about all the people I wanted to reach out to that I didn't,
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all the fences I wanted to mend,
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all the experiences I wanted to have and I never did.
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As I thought about that later on,
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I came up with a saying,
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which is, "I collect bad wines."
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Because if the wine is ready and the person is there, I'm opening it.
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I no longer want to postpone anything in life.
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And that urgency, that purpose, has really changed my life.
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The second thing I learned that day --
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and this is as we clear the George Washington Bridge,
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which was by not a lot --
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(Laughter)
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I thought about, wow, I really feel one real regret.
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I've lived a good life.
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In my own humanity and mistakes,
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I've tried to get better at everything I tried.
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But in my humanity, I also allow my ego to get in.
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And I regretted the time I wasted on things that did not matter
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with people that matter.
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And I thought about my relationship with my wife,
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with my friends, with people.
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And after, as I reflected on that,
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I decided to eliminate negative energy from my life.
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It's not perfect, but it's a lot better.
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I've not had a fight with my wife in two years.
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It feels great.
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I no longer try to be right;
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I choose to be happy.
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The third thing I learned --
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and this is as your mental clock starts going, "15, 14, 13."
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You can see the water coming.
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I'm saying, "Please blow up."
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I don't want this thing to break in 20 pieces
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like you've seen in those documentaries.
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And as we're coming down,
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I had a sense of, wow, dying is not scary.
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It's almost like we've been preparing for it our whole lives.
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But it was very sad.
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I didn't want to go; I love my life.
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And that sadness really framed in one thought,
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which is, I only wish for one thing.
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I only wish I could see my kids grow up.
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About a month later, I was at a performance by my daughter --
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first-grader, not much artistic talent --
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(Laughter)
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Yet!
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(Laughter)
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And I'm bawling, I'm crying, like a little kid.
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And it made all the sense in the world to me.
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I realized at that point, by connecting those two dots,
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that the only thing that matters in my life
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is being a great dad.
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Above all, above all,
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the only goal I have in life is to be a good dad.
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I was given the gift of a miracle,
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of not dying that day.
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I was given another gift,
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which was to be able to see into the future
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and come back
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and live differently.
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I challenge you guys that are flying today,
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imagine the same thing happens on your plane --
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and please don't --
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but imagine, and how would you change?
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What would you get done
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that you're waiting to get done because you think you'll be here forever?
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How would you change your relationships
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and the negative energy in them?
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And more than anything, are you being the best parent you can?
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Thank you.
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(Applause)
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