Joe Smith: How to use a paper towel

Translator: Aida Musai Reviewer: Helena Bedalli

Five hundred seventy-one million

259 mije ton

two hundred thirty thousand pounds of paper towels

letra fshirese duarsh

are used by Americans

perdoren nga amerikanet

every year.

cdo vit.

If we could -- correction, wrong figure --

Nese ne do te... me falni, dhashe shifren e gabuar...

13 billion used every year.

13 miliarde vete perdorin cdo vit.

If we could reduce the usage of paper towels,

Nese do te kursenim ne perdorimin e letres se duarve,

one paper towel per person per day,

me nje leter per cdo person cdo dite,

571,230,000 pounds of paper not used.

atehere do te kursenim 259.000 ton leter.

We can do that.

Ne mund t'a bejme kete.

Now there are all kinds of paper towel dispensers.

Ka disa tipe letra duarsh.

There's the tri-fold. People typically take two or three.

Eshte ajo e palosur ne tre. Njerezit marrin dy ose tre prej saj.

There's the one that cuts it, that you have to tear off.

Eshte ajo qe duhet prere, duhet t'a terheqesh.

People go one, two, three, four, tear.

Njerezit fillojne, nje, dy, tre, kater, pastaj terheqin.

This much, right?

Gjithe kete leter, apo jo?

There's the one that cuts itself.

Eshte ajo qe pritet vete.

People go, one, two, three, four.

Njerezit fillojne, nje, dy, tre, kater.

Or there's the same thing, but recycled paper,

Pastaj kemi po te njejtat tipe, por me leter te ricikluar,

you have to get five of those because they're not as absorbent, of course.

dhe sigurisht prej ketyre duhet te marresh pese, sepse ato nuk thithin mire.

The fact is, you can do it all with one towel.

E verteta eshte se ti mund t'ia dalesh me nje leter te vetme.

The key, two words:

Celesi? Dy fjale:

This half of the room, your word is "shake."

Gjysma ketej e dhomes, fjala juaj eshte "shkund".

Let's hear it. Shake. Louder.

Thuajeni fort. Shkund. Me fort.

Audience: Shake.

Publiku: Shkund

Joe Smith: Your word is "fold."

Joe Smith: Fjala juaj eshte "palos"

Audience: Fold.

Publiku: Palos

JS: Again.

Audience: Fold. JS: Really loud.

JS: Edhe nje here.

Publiku: Palos. JS: Me fort.

Audience: Shake. Fold.

Publiku: Shkund. Palos

JS: OK. Wet hands.

JS: Okay. Lagim duart.

Shake -- one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, 12.

Shkund... nje, dy, tre, kater, pese, gjashte, shtate, tete, nente, dhjete, njembedhjete, dymbedhjete.

Why 12? Twelve apostles, twelve tribes,

Pse 12? Jane dymbedhjete apostuj, dymbedhjete tribu

twelve zodiac signs, twelve months. The one I like the best:

dymbedhjete shenja horoskopi, dymbedhjete muaj. Dhe e preferuara ime:

It's the biggest number with one syllable.

eshte numri me i madh me vetem nje rrokje ne anglisht.

(Laughter)

(te qeshura)

Tri-fold. Fold ...

Letra e palosur ne tre. Palos...

Dry.

U thane.

(Applause)

(duartrokitje)

Audience: Shake.

Publiku: Shkund.

Fold.

Palos.

JS: Cuts itself. Fold. The fold is important

JS: Ajo qe pritet vete. Palos. Palosja eshte e rendesishme

because it allows interstitial suspension.

sepse lejon pezullimin e ndermjetem.

You don't have to remember that part, but trust me.

Kete pjese nuk duhet me doemos t'a kujtoni, thjesht besojeni.

(Laughter)

(te qeshura)

Audience: Shake. Fold.

Publiku: Shkund. Palos.

JS: Cuts itself.

JS: Ajo qe pritet vete.

You know the funny thing is,

Gjeja me argetuese eshte se

I get my hands drier than people do with three or four,

une i thaj duart me mire se ata qe perdorin tre apo kater letra,

because they can't get in between the cracks.

sepse ata nuk arrijne neper te carat.

If you think this isn't as good...

Nese mendoni se kjo nuk eshte aq e mire...

Audience: Shake. Fold.

Publiku: Shkund. Palos.

JS: Now, there's now a real fancy invention,

JS: Tani ka dale nje shpikje shume moderne

it's the one where you wave your hand

ajo ku ti leviz duart dhe

and it kicks it out.

dhe ajo heq ujin.

It's way too big a towel.

Por ajo eshte nje leter kaq e madhe.

Let me tell you a secret.

Me lejoni t'ju tregoj nje sekret.

If you're really quick, if you're really quick --

Nese tregoheni te shpejte, vertet te shpejte...

and I can prove this --

dhe une mund t'jua provoj kete...

this is half a towel from the dispenser in this building.

kjo eshte gjysma e nje letre nga makineria ne kete ndertese.

How? As soon as it starts, you just tear it off.

Si behet? Sapo letra te filloje te dale, ti duhet t'a terheqesh.

It's smart enough to stop.

Makina eshte aq e zgjuar sa te ndalet.

And you get half a towel.

Dhe ti ke vetem gjysme letre.

Audience: Shake. Fold.

Publiku: Shkund. Palos.

JS: Now, let's all say it together. Shake. Fold.

JS: Tani le t'a themi te gjithe bashke. Shkund. Palos.

You will for the rest of your life remember those words

Dhe ju do t'i kujtoni gjithnje keto fjale,

every time you pick up a paper towel.

sa here qe t'ju duhet nje leter duarsh.

And remember, one towel per person for one year --

Mos harroni, nje leter per cdo person per cdo vit...

571,230,000 pounds of paper. No small thing.

259.000 ton leter. Nuk eshte pak.

And next year, toilet paper.

Ndersa vitin e ardhshem, letra higjenike.

(Laughter)

(te qeshura)