Jane Fonda: Life's third act

翻译人员: Chunxiang Qian 校对人员: Xu Jiang

上个世纪发生了很多种

There have been many revolutions over the last century,

变革，

but perhaps none as significant as the longevity revolution.

但没有一个如同寿命的变革一样

具有深远意义。

We are living on average today 34 years longer

今天我们比曾祖父辈的平均寿命

要长34年。

than our great-grandparents did -- think about that.

试想一下。

That's an entire second adult lifetime

这是在原先寿命上加上了

that's been added to our lifespan.

整整第二个成年期的时间。

And yet, for the most part,

但是，从很大程度上说，

our culture has not come to terms with what this means.

我们的文化还没有与之相应地发展起来。

We're still living with the old paradigm

我们对年龄的理解

of age as an arch.

还是限于旧时的年龄拱形图。

That's the metaphor, the old metaphor.

这是老比喻了。

You're born, you peak at midlife

人从出生，到中年达到黄金期

and decline into decrepitude.

再到衰老。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

Age as pathology.

年龄就是病理学。

但是今天很多人－

But many people today -- philosophers, artists, doctors, scientists --

哲人、艺术家、医生还有科学家－

are taking a new look at what I call "the third act" --

都再重新审视我称之为的第三幕，

生命中的最后三十年。

the last three decades of life.

They realize that this is actually a developmental stage of life

他们意识到这实际是生命的一个发展阶段

with its own significance,

有其自身意义－

它与中年不一样

as different from midlife as adolescence is from childhood.

就如同青春期和童年不一样。

And they are asking -- we should all be asking:

他们在探寻－我们都应该探寻－

该怎样利用这些时间？

How do we use this time?

How do we live it successfully?

怎么才能成功地度过这段时间？

What is the appropriate new metaphor for aging?

什么才是对年老的

恰当比喻？

I've spent the last year researching and writing about this subject.

过去的一年里我一直在研究这个主题并展开相关的写作。

我发现了一个更加

And I have come to find that a more appropriate metaphor for aging

适合年老的比喻

is a staircase --

就是楼梯－

人类精神的升华，

the upward ascension of the human spirit,

bringing us into wisdom, wholeness, and authenticity.

引领我们走向智慧、完整

和真实。

Age not at all as pathology.

年龄根本不是病理学；

年龄是潜力。

Age as potential.

And guess what?

并且怎么样呢？

This potential is not for the lucky few.

这种潜力并不专属于幸运的少数人。

It turns out, most people over 50

相反，

很多超过五十岁的人

feel better, are less stressed, less hostile, less anxious.

感觉更好，压力更小，

感受到的敌意和焦虑更少。

我们逐渐发现共同处

We tend to see commonalities more than differences.

多于差异处。

Some of the studies even say we're happier.

有些研究甚至表明

我们更快乐

(Laughter)

This is not what I expected, trust me.

这不是我所预料的，真的。

我的生活里有太多压抑。

I come from a long line of depressives.

当我快到五十岁的时候，

As I was approaching my late 40s,

我每天早上醒过来

when I would wake up in the morning,

我脑子里的头六个想法都是负面的。

my first six thoughts would all be negative.

我给吓坏了。

And I got scared.

I thought, "Oh my gosh. I'm going to become a crotchety old lady."

我想，天哪。

我将变成一个古怪无常的老太太。

But now that I am actually smack-dab in the middle of my own third act,

而我现在正处于我的人生第三幕，

我意识到我从未有现在这么开心。

I realize I've never been happier.

我感觉过得十分安康得乐。

I have such a powerful feeling of well-being.

And I've discovered

我发现了

that when you're inside oldness,

相对于外表的衰老，

as opposed to looking at it from the outside,

内心的老去，

恐惧会平息。

fear subsides.

You realize you're still yourself --

我们自己还是那个自己－

maybe even more so.

也许更多。

Picasso once said, "It takes a long time to become young."

毕加索曾经说过：“要变年轻那可有得等。”

(Laughter)

（笑声）

I don't want to romanticize aging.

我不想美化衰老。

Obviously, there's no guarantee

很显然没人能保证

that it can be a time of fruition and growth.

会是个开花结果的过程。

有时候就是运气的事儿。

Some of it is a matter of luck.

有时候是基因的事儿。

Some of it, obviously, is genetic.

One third of it, in fact, is genetic.

有三分之一，实际上，都是基因的关系。

而我们对此无能为力。

And there isn't much we can do about that.

But that means that two-thirds of how well we do in the third act,

但这意味着在生命的第三幕

对三分之二的人来说，

我们可以有所作为。

we can do something about.

以下我将就如何成功地度过

We're going to discuss what we can do

to make these added years really successful,

这些多出来的年头并使其有意义

and use them to make a difference.

来讨论一下。

首先我先针对楼梯说两句，

Now, let me say something about the staircase,

这听上去象是个对老年人打的奇怪的比喻

which may seem like an odd metaphor for seniors,

而对于很多老年人来说，楼梯确实个挑战。

given the fact that many seniors are challenged by stairs.

（笑声）

(Laughter)

Myself included.

我自己也是。

众所周知，

As you may know, the entire world operates on a universal law:

整个世界有一个通行法则：

熵，热力学的第二定律。

entropy, the second law of thermodynamics.

Entropy means that everything in the world -- everything --

熵意味着世界上的一切事物，

is in a state of decline and decay --

都处于衰退中，

也就是拱形。

the arch.

There's only one exception to this universal law,

只有一个例外，

这就是人文精神，

and that is the human spirit,

它是持续增长的－

which can continue to evolve upwards, the staircase,

象楼梯一样－

bringing us into wholeness, authenticity, and wisdom.

引领我们到达完整，

真实和智慧。

And here's an example of what I mean.

这有一个例子

这种升华

This upward ascension

就算是在身体面临极度挑战下也能发生。

can happen even in the face of extreme physical challenges.

About three years ago, I read an article in the New York Times.

大概三年前，

我在《纽约时报》上读到一篇文章。

是关于一个名叫尼尔･西令戈尔的--

It was about a man named Neil Selinger --

57岁的退休律师--

57 years old, a retired lawyer,

who had joined the writers' group at Sarah Lawrence,

他加入了萨拉劳伦斯的写作小组

where he found his writer's voice.

在那里他找到了成为作家的感觉。

Two years later,

两年后，

he was diagnosed with ALS, commonly known as Lou Gehrig's disease.

他被诊断患有ALS，肌萎缩性侧索硬化症。

这是个致命的可怕疾病。

It's a terrible disease. It's fatal.

It wastes the body, but the mind remains intact.

它摧毁身体，但精神世界却保持完好。

In this article, Mr. Selinger wrote the following

在这篇文章里，西令戈尔先生这样

描述他的故事。

to describe what was happening to him.

我引用，

And I quote:

"As my muscles weakened,

“我的肌肉变的衰弱，

但写作能力却愈有力。

my writing became stronger.

As I slowly lost my speech,

我在慢慢地失去讲话的能力，

I gained my voice.

但却获得了声音。

As I diminished, I grew.

我在消亡，但又成长。

我失去了很多，

As I lost so much,

但却开始发现自我。”

I finally started to find myself."

对我来说，尼尔･西令戈尔

Neil Selinger, to me,

is the embodiment of mounting the staircase

是攀登人生第三阶梯的

具体体现。

in his third act.

Now we're all born with spirit, all of us,

所有人的灵魂与生俱来，

但常常会受到生活中

but sometimes it gets tamped down beneath the challenges of life,

各种困难的打击，

violence, abuse, neglect.

比如暴力，虐待，无视。

Perhaps our parents suffered from depression.

也许我们的父母正在受到抑郁症的困扰。

或许他们不能在超出我们在这个世界的成就

Perhaps they weren't able to love us beyond how we performed in the world.

来爱我们。

或许我们心灵中的创伤

Perhaps we still suffer from a psychic pain, a wound.

仍在隐隐作痛。

或许我们过往的感情很多是没有完结的故事。

Perhaps we feel that many of our relationships

have not had closure.

因此我们觉得不完整。

And so we can feel unfinished.

Perhaps the task of the third act

也许人生第三幕的任务

就是完成这些未完成的事。

is to finish up the task of finishing ourselves.

For me, it began as I was approaching my third act, my 60th birthday.

我正在步入我的人生第三幕，

我的60岁生日。

How was I supposed to live it?

我应该怎样度过？

What was I supposed to accomplish in this final act?

怎样完成这最后一幕？

And I realized that, in order to know where I was going,

我意识到，要知道往哪里去，

I had to know where I'd been.

必须先明白我从哪里来。

于是我就回过头

And so I went back and I studied my first two acts,

去探寻我人生的前两幕，

去看看我曾是谁，

trying to see who I was then,

who I really was, not who my parents or other people told me I was,

正真的自己是什么样－

这个自己不是我的父母或别人告诉我的，

或他们对待我的样子。

or treated me like I was.

我是什么样的人？我的父母是什么样的－

But who was I?

Who were my parents -- not as parents, but as people?

单纯从社会个体看他们的话？

我的祖父母又是什么样？

Who were my grandparents?

How did they treat my parents?

他们是怎样对待我的父母的？

These kinds of things.

此类的问题。

几年后我才知道

I discovered, a couple of years later,

我所做的这个过程

that this process that I had gone through

在心理学上叫做

is called by psychologists "doing a life review."

“生平回顾”。

And they say it can give new significance and clarity and meaning

据说这能赋予一个人的生命

新的意义

to a person's life.

并是其变得明晰。

You may discover, as I did,

像我一样，也许你会发现，

that a lot of things that you used to think were your fault,

很多你曾引以自咎的事，

很多无法放下的事，

a lot of things you used to think about yourself,

都不是你的问题。

really had nothing to do with you.

错不在你。

It wasn't your fault; you're just fine.

这样你就能

And you're able to go back and forgive them.

原谅他们

也原谅自己。

And forgive yourself.

把自己从过去的阴影中

You're able to free yourself

释放出来。

from your past.

并尝试

You can work to change your relationship to your past.

改变对待自身过去的态度。

当我写下这些的时候，

Now while I was writing about this,

我想到了一本书《活出意义来》

I came upon a book called "Man's Search for Meaning"

维克多･弗兰克尔所著。

by Viktor Frankl.

他是名精神医师

Viktor Frankl was a German psychiatrist

who'd spent five years in a Nazi concentration camp.

在纳粹集中营里被关过5年。

And he wrote that, while he was in the camp,

在集中营里他写道，

he could tell, should they ever be released,

他知道，如果他们被释放的话，

which of the people would be OK, and which would not.

谁能平安度过

谁则不能。

他写道：

And he wrote this:

“生命中的一切都可能被剥夺

"Everything you have in life can be taken from you

只有一个例外，

except one thing:

那就是你可以决定

your freedom to choose how you will respond to the situation.

怎样去应对

面临的处境。

这一点决定了

This is what determines the quality of the life we've lived --

我们生命的质量－

not whether we've been rich or poor,

不在于贫富，

不在于名声，

famous or unknown,

healthy or suffering.

也不在于健康与否。

What determines our quality of life is how we relate to these realities,

决定生命质量的

是我们怎样面对现实，

what kind of meaning we assign them,

我们对现实的认知，

what kind of attitude we cling to about them,

面对现实的态度，

和我们由此生发的心境。”

what state of mind we allow them to trigger."

也许生命第三幕的核心意义

Perhaps the central purpose of the third act

is to go back and to try, if appropriate,

就是回朔并尝试，

to change our relationship to the past.

修正自身对

过去的认识。

It turns out that cognitive research shows

有认知研究显示

当我们能做到这些时，

when we are able to do this,

it manifests neurologically --

这能在神经上反应出来－

neural pathways are created in the brain.

它能在大脑里创建神经通路。

You see, if you have, over time,

如果你长时间，

reacted negatively to past events and people,

对过去或者别人持负面情绪，

大脑中的化学信号和电信号

neural pathways are laid down

by chemical and electrical signals that are sent through the brain.

就会阻碍神经通路。

随着时间推移，这些神经通路就会固化，

And over time, these neural pathways become hardwired.

最后就变成了模式－

They become the norm -- even if it's bad for us,

这会给我们带来压力和焦虑

because it causes us stress and anxiety.

对我们有害。

但是

If, however,

we can go back and alter our relationship,

如果我们能回头修正对过去的看法

re-vision our relationship to past people and events,

重建和自己过去的

关系，

neural pathways can change.

神经通路可以被改变。

And if we can maintain the more positive feelings

如果我们能保持对过去

持积极的态度，

about the past,

that becomes the new norm.

这就会成为新的模式。

It's like resetting a thermostat.

这就像重新设置恒温器一样。

这并不是去获得

It's not having experiences

使人智慧的体验，

that makes us wise.

但是这反映出我们已经有了

It's reflecting on the experiences that we've had that makes us wise

使自己变得智慧的体验－

and that helps us become whole,

从而使我们达到完整，

brings wisdom and authenticity.

得到智慧和真实。

It helps us become what we might have been.

这能帮我们实现曾经的理想。

Women start off whole, don't we?

女性都是完整地开始的，对吧？

I mean, as girls, we're feisty -- "Yeah? Who says?"

因为小女孩的时候我们都很强大--“是呀，谁说的？”

(Laughter)

我们精力旺盛。

We have agency.

We are the subjects of our own lives.

我们是自己的主人。

但常常，

But very often,

many, if not most of us, when we hit puberty,

很多人，不是大多数人，达到青春期后，

we start worrying about fitting in and being popular.

开始为形象和人气操心。

And we become the subjects and objects of other people's lives.

为别人而生活。

但现在，在生命的第三幕，

But now, in our third acts,

我们也许有可能

it may be possible for us to circle back to where we started,

回望过去

重新开始。

and know it for the first time.

如果我们能做到这一点，

And if we can do that,

it will not just be for ourselves.

这不仅是对我们自己有益。

Older women are the largest demographic in the world.

老年女性

是世界人口最大的一个组成。

如果我们能回到过去重新定义自己

If we can go back and redefine ourselves

变得完整，

and become whole,

这将在全球创造新的文化变革，

this will create a cultural shift in the world,

and it will give an example to younger generations

并给年轻一代树立榜样

这样他们可以重新认知他们的生命。

so that they can reconceive their own lifespan.

Thank you very much.

非常谢谢。

(Applause)

（掌声）