Jane Fonda: Life's third act

譯者: Andrea Huang 審譯者: Ting-Yu CHU

上一世紀中發生了

There have been many revolutions over the last century,

許多革命性的事情，

but perhaps none as significant as the longevity revolution.

但或許沒有"長壽革命"

要來的意義非凡。

We are living on average today 34 years longer

我們現今的平均壽命

比我們的曾祖父母多34年。

than our great-grandparents did -- think about that.

想想看。

That's an entire second adult lifetime

這是我們壽命中增加的

that's been added to our lifespan.

第二段成人期。

And yet, for the most part,

然而,重點來了，

our culture has not come to terms with what this means.

我們的文化卻尚未意識到它所代表的涵意。

We're still living with the old paradigm

我們仍然照著舊式生命拱形曲線

of age as an arch.

而生活著。

That's the metaphor, the old metaphor.

這是比喻，舊的比喻。

You're born, you peak at midlife

我們出生，在中年進入高峰

and decline into decrepitude.

然後曲線下降到衰老期。

(Laughter)

♪笑聲♪

Age as pathology.

老化是跟著病理學曲線而行的。

但現今有許多人﹣

But many people today -- philosophers, artists, doctors, scientists --

哲學家、藝術家、醫生、科學家﹣

are taking a new look at what I call "the third act" --

對我所謂的”生命的第三幕“，也就是

生命中最後的30年有了新的看法。

the last three decades of life.

They realize that this is actually a developmental stage of life

他們認為它事實上是別具意義的

with its own significance,

一段人生發展階段 --

從中年時期到後30年的發展，

as different from midlife as adolescence is from childhood.

就有如從兒童時期到青少年時期般的不同。

And they are asking -- we should all be asking:

他們因而提出了疑問﹣我們應該也要想想﹣

要如何運用這時光？

How do we use this time?

How do we live it successfully?

該如何活的有意義呢？

What is the appropriate new metaphor for aging?

”老化“一詞應重新定義

為何呢？

I've spent the last year researching and writing about this subject.

去年我一直在研究及撰寫這個議題。

我找到較適合代替

And I have come to find that a more appropriate metaphor for aging

”老化“的新比喻﹣

is a staircase --

就是爬樓梯﹣

那象徵人類精神的提昇，

the upward ascension of the human spirit,

bringing us into wisdom, wholeness, and authenticity.

也就是帶領我們朝向智慧、完整

及真實的精神提昇。

Age not at all as pathology.

老化不是病理學的名詞，

老化是具潛質的。

Age as potential.

And guess what?

你們知道嗎？

This potential is not for the lucky few.

這樣的潛質不是少數人才有。

It turns out, most people over 50

我發現，

大部分年過50的人

feel better, are less stressed, less hostile, less anxious.

自我感覺較良好、較少有壓力感

、較友善、比較沒有焦慮感。

面對事情的態度

We tend to see commonalities more than differences.

大多見怪不怪。

Some of the studies even say we're happier.

有些研究甚至指出

我們是比較快樂的。

(Laughter)

This is not what I expected, trust me.

相信我，這樣的結論跟我原先預期的不同。

我曾經焦慮了好長一段時間。

I come from a long line of depressives.

在我快50歲的時候

As I was approaching my late 40s,

早上醒來腦中浮現的

when I would wake up in the morning,

前六個想法都是負面的。

my first six thoughts would all be negative.

我因而感到恐懼。

And I got scared.

I thought, "Oh my gosh. I'm going to become a crotchety old lady."

我想著＂天啊，

我快變成思想怪異的老女人了。

But now that I am actually smack-dab in the middle of my own third act,

現在我正處於生命的第三章，

我卻快樂的不得了。

I realize I've never been happier.

我感到非常的安穩。

I have such a powerful feeling of well-being.

And I've discovered

而我發現，

that when you're inside oldness,

當我們的內在，相對於從外表來看

as opposed to looking at it from the outside,

也相對”陳年"了，

恐懼感也會跟著消失。

fear subsides.

You realize you're still yourself --

最後會發現，你還是你﹣

maybe even more so.

也可能因而更了解自己。

Picasso once said, "It takes a long time to become young."

畢卡索曾說＂經歷歲月後才能變年輕＂。

(Laughter)

♪笑聲♪

I don't want to romanticize aging.

我不是要將衰老浪漫化。

Obviously, there's no guarantee

當然，

that it can be a time of fruition and growth.

要開花結果可不是必然的。

有些是因為幸運。

Some of it is a matter of luck.

有些很明顯的是因為遺傳。

Some of it, obviously, is genetic.

One third of it, in fact, is genetic.

事實上三分之一的原因是遺傳。

我們可以控制的因素不多。

And there isn't much we can do about that.

But that means that two-thirds of how well we do in the third act,

但生命尾章三分之二

的部分確是我們

可以好好掌控的。

we can do something about.

接下來我們將會討論

We're going to discuss what we can do

to make these added years really successful,

要如何善用這些來年

and use them to make a difference.

來造就不凡。

讓我來說說“爬樓梯”這件事，

Now, let me say something about the staircase,

這個比喻對於上樓梯有困難的長者

which may seem like an odd metaphor for seniors,

或許是個奇怪的比喻。

given the fact that many seniors are challenged by stairs.

♪笑♪

(Laughter)

Myself included.

我自己也是。

大家都知道

As you may know, the entire world operates on a universal law:

世界都是以不變的定律來運作：

熵，熱力學第二定律。

entropy, the second law of thermodynamics.

Entropy means that everything in the world -- everything --

熵的意思是，世界上所有物質

is in a state of decline and decay --

都以下降、衰退的狀態呈現，

那就是生命曲線。

the arch.

There's only one exception to this universal law,

只有一件事是是例外﹣

人類的精神，

and that is the human spirit,

可以持續的向上昇華﹣﹣

which can continue to evolve upwards, the staircase,

就如同階梯﹣﹣

bringing us into wholeness, authenticity, and wisdom.

帶領我們趨向完整、

真實及智慧的階梯。

And here's an example of what I mean.

舉個例子來說明我的比喻。

在面臨極度肢體障礙時，

This upward ascension

精神仍就可以向上昇華。

can happen even in the face of extreme physical challenges.

About three years ago, I read an article in the New York Times.

三年前

我從紐約時代上讀到一篇文章。

那是關於一位名為尼爾 施林格--

It was about a man named Neil Selinger --

57歲的退休律師的故事--

57 years old, a retired lawyer,

who had joined the writers' group at Sarah Lawrence,

他在加入莎拉勞倫斯學院的寫作班中

where he found his writer's voice.

發現自己的寫作天分。

Two years later,

二年後

he was diagnosed with ALS, commonly known as Lou Gehrig's disease.

他被診斷出肌萎縮性側索硬化症（盧伽雷氏病）。

那是個很恐怖且致命性的疾病。

It's a terrible disease. It's fatal.

It wastes the body, but the mind remains intact.

疾病衰弱他的身體，但沒有侵犯到他的心智。

In this article, Mr. Selinger wrote the following

在那篇文章中，施林格先生將

他患病的歴程做了描述。

to describe what was happening to him.

我在此引述他的一段話：

And I quote:

"As my muscles weakened,

「肌肉雖然漸行衰弱，

但我文風漸行強健。

my writing became stronger.

As I slowly lost my speech,

說話能力雖然漸漸尚矢，

I gained my voice.

但我表達因而變得敏銳。

As I diminished, I grew.

雖然身形憔悴，但我心靈得以依舊成長。

因為喪失太多，

As I lost so much,

我終究開啟自我心靈的探索。」

I finally started to find myself."

對我來說，尼爾 施林格

Neil Selinger, to me,

is the embodiment of mounting the staircase

是在其生命的第三幕登上階梯的

具體代表。

in his third act.

Now we're all born with spirit, all of us,

靈性是與生俱來的,

但有時我們的心靈

but sometimes it gets tamped down beneath the challenges of life,

會因生活上遭遇的困境

violence, abuse, neglect.

、暴力、傷害、疏忽而受打壓。

Perhaps our parents suffered from depression.

也許是我們抑鬱寡歡的父母親影響了我們。

也許是他們論功行賞的主義作祟

Perhaps they weren't able to love us beyond how we performed in the world.

而不能愛我們。

也許我們仍遭受於

Perhaps we still suffer from a psychic pain, a wound.

心靈痛苦、創傷。

或許我們覺得多數我們與他人的關係並未結束。

Perhaps we feel that many of our relationships

have not had closure.

我們因而感到還有希望。

And so we can feel unfinished.

Perhaps the task of the third act

或許生命的第三幕的任務是

去完成我們未完成的任務。

is to finish up the task of finishing ourselves.

For me, it began as I was approaching my third act, my 60th birthday.

對我而言，我是在邁入生命的第三幕、

60歲生日時才開始想這個問題。

How was I supposed to live it?

我要怎麼渡過這第三幕呢？

What was I supposed to accomplish in this final act?

我應該完成什麼任務呢？

And I realized that, in order to know where I was going,

我領悟到，為了知道要走的方向，

I had to know where I'd been.

我必需了解曾經走過的歲月。

所以我回想

And so I went back and I studied my first two acts,

60歲之前的我

是個什麼樣的人呢?

trying to see who I was then,

who I really was, not who my parents or other people told me I was,

我以前到底是什麼樣的人--

不是在父母或他人眼中的我、

或是被討好那一面的我。

or treated me like I was.

而是我自己到底是誰？我的父母親是誰-

But who was I?

Who were my parents -- not as parents, but as people?

除了父母的身分之外，他們還是什麼樣的人？

我的祖父母又是什麼樣的人呢？

Who were my grandparents?

How did they treat my parents?

他們是如何養育我父母的呢？

These kinds of things.

我想的是這些事情。

幾年後我才知道，

I discovered, a couple of years later,

原來我用的方法是

that this process that I had gone through

心理學家稱之為

is called by psychologists "doing a life review."

＂回顧人生＂法。

And they say it can give new significance and clarity and meaning

他們說用這個方法

可以使人對人生

to a person's life.

產生新定義、清晰其思慮。

You may discover, as I did,

你們會跟我一樣發現，

that a lot of things that you used to think were your fault,

你以前認為是自己的錯、

是自己造成的結果的很多事情，

a lot of things you used to think about yourself,

其實都不是自己的問題。

really had nothing to do with you.

那不是你的錯，跟你沒關係。

It wasn't your fault; you're just fine.

因此，回頭來你能夠去

And you're able to go back and forgive them.

原諒別人

及自己。

And forgive yourself.

你能夠走出

You're able to free yourself

過去的陰霾。

from your past.

得以改變過去

You can work to change your relationship to your past.

對自己造成的影響。

當我在為這個議題下筆時，

Now while I was writing about this,

我想到了一本由弗蘭克博士寫的

I came upon a book called "Man's Search for Meaning"

＂活出意義來＂這本書。

by Viktor Frankl.

弗蘭克博士是一位德國的心理學家，

Viktor Frankl was a German psychiatrist

who'd spent five years in a Nazi concentration camp.

他曾在納粹集中營渡過5年的時間。

And he wrote that, while he was in the camp,

他在集中營時寫道，

he could tell, should they ever be released,

假使有天這些人被放了出去，他可以分辨得出來，

which of the people would be OK, and which would not.

誰心理可以調適正常，

而誰熬不過去。

他寫道：

And he wrote this:

「我們生命中所擁有的都可以被奪去，

"Everything you have in life can be taken from you

唯有一件事是搶不走的，

except one thing:

那就是你可以自由決定

your freedom to choose how you will respond to the situation.

以什麼樣的心態去

面對遭遇。

心態是生活品質

This is what determines the quality of the life we've lived --

好壞的關鍵--

not whether we've been rich or poor,

不論是富有或貧窮、

名人或平凡人、

famous or unknown,

healthy or suffering.

健康或因病而痛苦的。

What determines our quality of life is how we relate to these realities,

決定我們生活品質的

是我們如何看待事情、

what kind of meaning we assign them,

我們賦予該事件什麼樣的意義、

what kind of attitude we cling to about them,

我們對該事件抱持什麼樣的態度、

我們讓該事件誘發什麼樣的情緒。」

what state of mind we allow them to trigger."

也許生命尾章的中心目的

Perhaps the central purpose of the third act

is to go back and to try, if appropriate,

是回到過去，如果適當的話，

to change our relationship to the past.

並嘗試改變自己與過往

的關係。

It turns out that cognitive research shows

認知研究發現

當我們這麼做的時候，

when we are able to do this,

it manifests neurologically --

大腦中的神經活動會特別顯著 -

neural pathways are created in the brain.

也就是說神經傳導路徑會在大腦生成。

You see, if you have, over time,

所以如果你一直對過往的

reacted negatively to past events and people,

人事物是抱持著負面的態度，

由大腦傳遞出的化學及電子訊息鋪設而成的

neural pathways are laid down

by chemical and electrical signals that are sent through the brain.

神經傳導路徑

長久下來就會變成固定的模式。

And over time, these neural pathways become hardwired.

形成標準路徑--

They become the norm -- even if it's bad for us,

儘管它造成緊張跟焦慮

because it causes us stress and anxiety.

對我們有害

然而如果

If, however,

we can go back and alter our relationship,

我們回顧並改變

re-vision our relationship to past people and events,

我們對過往

人事物的觀感，

neural pathways can change.

神經傳導的路徑就會改變。

And if we can maintain the more positive feelings

如果我們能持續的

對過去抱持越正面的觀感，

about the past,

that becomes the new norm.

那麼神經傳導的路徑就會形成新的的模式。

It's like resetting a thermostat.

就好像重設恆溫器一樣。

經驗並不會

It's not having experiences

使我們變聰明，

that makes us wise.

如何看待經驗

It's reflecting on the experiences that we've had that makes us wise

才是智慧--

and that helps us become whole,

它讓我們變得健全完整、

brings wisdom and authenticity.

有智慧並回歸自我。

It helps us become what we might have been.

藉此讓我們回歸到初衷。

Women start off whole, don't we?

我們女性的本性善良,不是嗎?

I mean, as girls, we're feisty -- "Yeah? Who says?"

我的意思是, 在我們還是小女孩時,我們都很活潑--＂哼，誰說的?＂

(Laughter)

我們果敢。

We have agency.

We are the subjects of our own lives.

我們是自己生命中的主角。

然而往往

But very often,

many, if not most of us, when we hit puberty,

很多人在青春期時，

we start worrying about fitting in and being popular.

就開始擔心融入群體及是否受歡迎的問題。

And we become the subjects and objects of other people's lives.

於是我們變成了為別人而活。

但現在，在我們的生命的第三幕裡，

But now, in our third acts,

我們也許可以

it may be possible for us to circle back to where we started,

繞回到起點

重新認識。

and know it for the first time.

如果我們做得到，

And if we can do that,

it will not just be for ourselves.

受益的不只是我們。

Older women are the largest demographic in the world.

高齡婦女的

人口數是世界上最多的。

倘若我們能回顧並重新定義自己

If we can go back and redefine ourselves

成為健全的人士，

and become whole,

那麼就能夠創造出文化變遷，

this will create a cultural shift in the world,

and it will give an example to younger generations

那將會為年輕一代樹立新典範，

新一代得以重新定義其生命的長度。

so that they can reconceive their own lifespan.

Thank you very much.

感謝各位的聆聽。

(Applause)

♪掌聲♪