Are you a giver or a taker? | Adam Grant

3,804,490 views ・ 2017-01-24

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00:00
Translator: Leslie Gauthier Reviewer: Camille Martínez
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譯者: Qiao Ma 審譯者: Ming Lee
00:12
I want you to look around the room for a minute
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請各位環顧一下四周,
試著找出最疑神疑鬼的人。
00:15
and try to find the most paranoid person here --
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00:17
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
00:18
And then I want you to point at that person for me.
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請你把那個人指出來。
00:21
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
00:22
OK, don't actually do it.
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不用真的指。
00:23
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
身為一名組織心理學家,
00:25
But, as an organizational psychologist,
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00:26
I spend a lot of time in workplaces,
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我常常去很多工作場所,
00:28
and I find paranoia everywhere.
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發現不少疑神疑鬼的人。
00:31
Paranoia is caused by people that I call "takers."
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多疑是因為「取者」的存在。
00:33
Takers are self-serving in their interactions.
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他們在互動中比較自利。
總想著你能為我做什麼。
00:36
It's all about what can you do for me.
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00:38
The opposite is a giver.
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相反的是「施者」。
00:40
It's somebody who approaches most interactions by asking,
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他們常常會問:
「我能為你做什麼?」
00:43
"What can I do for you?"
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我想要大家想一想自己是哪種人。
00:45
I wanted to give you a chance to think about your own style.
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我們都有付出和受惠的時候。
00:48
We all have moments of giving and taking.
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至於你是屬於哪種類型?
00:50
Your style is how you treat most of the people most of the time,
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則要看你內建的思考模式; 看你平時如何看待他人而定。
00:53
your default.
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有個測試可用來判斷 你是施者還是取者,
00:54
I have a short test you can take
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00:55
to figure out if you're more of a giver or a taker,
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你們可以現在就做一下測試。
00:58
and you can take it right now.
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【自戀狂測試】
00:59
[The Narcissist Test]
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【步驟 1:花時間想一想自己】
01:01
[Step 1: Take a moment to think about yourself.]
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(笑聲)
01:03
(Laughter)
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【步驟 2:如果你到了第二步, 你就不是一個自戀者】
01:04
[Step 2: If you made it to Step 2, you are not a narcissist.]
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01:07
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
這是今天唯一沒有數據根據的測試,
01:10
This is the only thing I will say today that has no data behind it,
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01:13
but I am convinced the longer it takes for you to laugh at this cartoon,
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但我相信如果上面那個卡通,
引你笑起來的時間越久,
01:17
the more worried we should be that you're a taker.
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那麼你就更傾向於是一個「取者」。
01:19
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
01:20
Of course, not all takers are narcissists.
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當然,不是所有「取者」 都是自戀狂。
01:22
Some are just givers who got burned one too many times.
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有些只是上當了太多次的「施者」。
01:25
Then there's another kind of taker that we won't be addressing today,
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還有一種「取者」 我們今天不作討論,
01:29
and that's called a psychopath.
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稱之為「神經病」。
(笑聲)
01:31
(Laughter)
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01:32
I was curious, though, about how common these extremes are,
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我曾好奇這種極端現象會有多普遍,
01:35
and so I surveyed over 30,000 people across industries
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於是我對全世界不同文化的業者,
進行了超過三萬人的調查。
01:38
around the world's cultures.
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01:39
And I found that most people are right in the middle
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然後我發現大部分人都是介於 「施者」與「取者」之間。
01:42
between giving and taking.
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01:43
They choose this third style called "matching."
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人們把這種類型叫做「對等者」。
如果你是「對等者」, 你會在付出與獲取之間保持平衡:
01:46
If you're a matcher, you try to keep an even balance of give and take:
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並以「等值交換」的角度思考;
01:49
quid pro quo -- I'll do something for you if you do something for me.
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如果你能為我做甚麼, 我就會為你做些什麼。
01:52
And that seems like a safe way to live your life.
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這是一種比較安全的生活方式。
但這是否是最有效率的生活方式呢?
01:55
But is it the most effective and productive way to live your life?
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01:58
The answer to that question is a very definitive ...
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這個問題的回答是非常確定的:
02:00
maybe.
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可能吧。
(笑聲)
02:02
(Laughter)
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02:03
I studied dozens of organizations,
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我對很多組織 和數以千計的人進行研究。
02:05
thousands of people.
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02:06
I had engineers measuring their productivity.
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我評估工程師的生產率。
02:10
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
02:12
I looked at medical students' grades --
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我研究醫學院學生的成績,
02:15
even salespeople's revenue.
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甚至銷售員的業績。
02:17
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
出人意外地發現;
02:19
And, unexpectedly,
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02:20
the worst performers in each of these jobs were the givers.
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工作表現最差者 都是來自那些「施者」。
02:24
The engineers who got the least work done
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那些事情做得最少的工程師,
02:26
were the ones who did more favors than they got back.
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都是那些「幫助別人」, 多於「被人幫助」的人。
02:29
They were so busy doing other people's jobs,
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他們用了太多的時間去幫助別人,
02:31
they literally ran out of time and energy to get their own work completed.
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以至於沒有時間和精力 完成自己的任務。
在醫學院,分數最低的學生,
02:35
In medical school, the lowest grades belong to the students
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02:37
who agree most strongly with statements like,
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會特別認同某些說法,
比如:「我喜歡幫助別人。」
02:40
"I love helping others,"
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這是否代表那些你應該信任的醫生,
02:43
which suggests the doctor you ought to trust
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02:45
is the one who came to med school with no desire to help anybody.
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都來自於那些比較 不想幫別人的醫學生?
02:48
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
02:49
And then in sales, too, the lowest revenue accrued
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在銷售行業也一樣,
收入最低的銷售員都是 那些最慷慨的人。
02:51
in the most generous salespeople.
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02:53
I actually reached out to one of those salespeople
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我接觸過一個那樣子的銷售員。
他在「施者」評價中有很高的分數。
02:56
who had a very high giver score.
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02:57
And I asked him, "Why do you suck at your job --"
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我問他「為何你工作表現那麼遜?」
03:00
I didn't ask it that way, but --
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我沒用那種口氣問他,但……
03:01
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
03:02
"What's the cost of generosity in sales?"
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「在行銷過程中慷慨的 代價是什麼?」
03:05
And he said, "Well, I just care so deeply about my customers
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他說:「我只是特別在乎我的客戶,
03:08
that I would never sell them one of our crappy products."
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我從來不會 把糟糕的產品賣給他們。」
03:11
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
03:12
So just out of curiosity,
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僅僅是出於好奇,
有多少人認為自己是「施者」,
03:14
how many of you self-identify more as givers than takers or matchers?
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而不是「取者」或「對等者」?
03:17
Raise your hands.
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請舉手。
03:18
OK, it would have been more before we talked about these data.
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好的,在我們談到這些資料之前,
應該事先多談一點其他的。
03:22
But actually, it turns out there's a twist here,
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但實際上,這裡有個轉折,
由於「施者」往往犧牲自己,
03:26
because givers are often sacrificing themselves,
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03:29
but they make their organizations better.
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但是他們總是讓組織變得更好。
03:32
We have a huge body of evidence --
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我們有大量的證據──
(38 個研究,3611 工作單位)
03:35
many, many studies looking at the frequency of giving behavior
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在不同團體組織中, 針對「給予頻率」做了無數的研究。
03:38
that exists in a team or an organization --
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發現當組織中有更多人 分享他們的知識、
03:41
and the more often people are helping and sharing their knowledge
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幫助他人或給他人提供指導時,
03:44
and providing mentoring,
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這樣的組織在我們所評估的 各項指標中都做得更好:
03:45
the better organizations do on every metric we can measure:
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更高的利潤、客戶滿意度、 員工留職率,
03:48
higher profits, customer satisfaction, employee retention --
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03:50
even lower operating expenses.
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甚至更低的運作支出。
03:53
So givers spend a lot of time trying to help other people
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所以「施者」用了 許多時間來幫助別人,
03:56
and improve the team,
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和幫助團隊,
03:57
and then, unfortunately, they suffer along the way.
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不幸的是,一路上受苦的 是他們自己。
我想談的是:要怎麼做, 才能營造出一個讓「施者」
04:00
I want to talk about what it takes
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04:01
to build cultures where givers actually get to succeed.
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也能夠真正成功獲益的文化?
04:05
So I wondered, then, if givers are the worst performers,
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於是我在想: 如果施者是表現最糟糕的人,
04:08
who are the best performers?
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那誰才是表現最好的人呢?
04:11
Let me start with the good news: it's not the takers.
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讓我先從好消息說起: 答案並不是「取者」。
「取者」在大多數工作中, 會迅速的成功,也會迅速的失敗。
04:14
Takers tend to rise quickly but also fall quickly in most jobs.
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04:17
And they fall at the hands of matchers.
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他們會敗在「對等者」手中。
04:19
If you're a matcher, you believe in "An eye for an eye" -- a just world.
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假如你是一個「對等者」,
你信仰「以眼還眼」的教條; 認為這是正義的世界。
04:23
And so when you meet a taker,
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當你遇到一個「取者」的時候,
04:24
you feel like it's your mission in life
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你會自認搞死那些惡人, 是你生命中最神聖的任務。
04:26
to just punish the hell out of that person.
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04:28
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
04:29
And that way justice gets served.
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那是伸張正義的方式。
大部分人都是「對等者」。
04:32
Well, most people are matchers.
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那意味著如果你是一個「取者」,
04:34
And that means if you're a taker,
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04:35
it tends to catch up with you eventually;
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出來混終於要還的:
04:37
what goes around will come around.
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躲得了初一,躲不了十五。
04:39
And so the logical conclusion is:
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合理的結論是:
「對等者」一定會是表現最好的;
04:41
it must be the matchers who are the best performers.
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04:43
But they're not.
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但其實並非如此。
04:45
In every job, in every organization I've ever studied,
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在我所研究過的所有工作和組織中,
04:48
the best results belong to the givers again.
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表現最好的還是「施者」。
04:51
Take a look at some data I gathered from hundreds of salespeople,
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看我收集到的數百名 銷售員利潤數據,
04:54
tracking their revenue.
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可以看出「施者」分佈在兩個極端。
04:56
What you can see is that the givers go to both extremes.
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04:58
They make up the majority of people who bring in the lowest revenue,
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他們是創造最低利潤的主要群體,
但同時也是創造 最高利潤的主要族群。
05:01
but also the highest revenue.
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呈現出相同模式的還有 工程師的生產率,
05:03
The same patterns were true for engineers' productivity
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和醫學院學生的成績。
05:06
and medical students' grades.
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「施者」在成功指標分布曲線中,
05:07
Givers are overrepresented at the bottom and at the top
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不成比例的呈現在 我所有成功指標的頂端和底端。
05:10
of every success metric that I can track.
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05:12
Which raises the question:
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這產生了一個問題:
05:13
How do we create a world where more of these givers get to excel?
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我們如何能夠創造一種環境? 讓更多的「施者」變得成功?
05:16
I want to talk about how to do that, not just in businesses,
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我想聊一下這個話题, 不僅僅針對企業,
05:19
but also in nonprofits, schools --
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還包括非盈利機構、學校、
05:21
even governments.
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甚至政府。
05:22
Are you ready?
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你們準備好了嗎?
05:24
(Cheers)
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(歡呼)
05:25
I was going to do it anyway, but I appreciate the enthusiasm.
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無論如何我都是要說的, 不過我很感謝你們的熱情。
05:28
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
05:29
The first thing that's really critical
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首先至關重要的是,
05:31
is to recognize that givers are your most valuable people,
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你必須了解到「施者」 是最有價值的人,
但是如果他們不小心, 就會把自己累死。
05:34
but if they're not careful, they burn out.
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05:36
So you have to protect the givers in your midst.
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所以你要保護好這些「施者」。
我從財星雜誌 最佳社交網路達人那裡,
05:39
And I learned a great lesson about this from Fortune's best networker.
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學到了很棒的一課。
05:44
It's the guy, not the cat.
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是那個人,不是那只貓。
05:46
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
05:47
His name is Adam Rifkin.
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他叫亞當.里夫金,
05:49
He's a very successful serial entrepreneur
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他是一個非常成功的連續創業者。
05:51
who spends a huge amount of his time helping other people.
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他花了超級多的時間來幫助其他人。
05:54
And his secret weapon is the five-minute favor.
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他的秘密武器是: 「幫忙 5 分鐘。」
05:57
Adam said, "You don't have to be Mother Teresa or Gandhi
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亞當說:「你不需要像 德蕾莎修女或甘地
05:59
to be a giver.
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才能成為一個施者。
你只需要利用很小的方法,
06:01
You just have to find small ways to add large value
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就可以給別人的生命 帶來巨大的價值。」
06:03
to other people's lives."
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就像介紹人互相認識那樣簡單,
06:05
That could be as simple as making an introduction
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引介兩個彼此有利的人 互相認識就可了!
06:07
between two people who could benefit from knowing each other.
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可以彼此分享知識或提供一些回饋。
06:10
It could be sharing your knowledge or giving a little bit of feedback.
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也可以做一些很基本的事,
06:13
Or It might be even something as basic as saying,
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你可以開口這樣說:
06:16
"You know,
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「你知道嗎?我可以去發掘 那些工作成果被忽視的人。」
06:17
I'm going to try and figure out
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06:18
if I can recognize somebody whose work has gone unnoticed."
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06:22
And those five-minute favors are really critical
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那些「幫助 5 分鐘」的 工作真的很重要,
06:24
to helping givers set boundaries and protect themselves.
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可以幫助「施者」 設下界線來保護自己。
06:27
The second thing that matters
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其次重要的是,
06:29
if you want to build a culture where givers succeed,
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如果你想創造一個 施者可以成功的文化,
06:31
is you actually need a culture where help-seeking is the norm;
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你真正需要創造的是: 一個以尋求幫助別人為文化的環境。
06:34
where people ask a lot.
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人們可以提出一堆問題的環境。
(字幕:鼓勵尋求幫助)
06:36
This may hit a little too close to home for some of you.
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這一幕可能會讓 在座的某些人產生共鳴,
(字幕:在你經歷過的人際關係中, 你總是扮演 「施者」的腳色嗎?)
06:39
[So in all your relationships, you always have to be the giver?]
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06:42
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
06:43
What you see with successful givers
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你看到的成功「施者」, 都知道作為一個收受者也是正常的。
06:45
is they recognize that it's OK to be a receiver, too.
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06:48
If you run an organization, we can actually make this easier.
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如果你是一位企業經營者, 我們可以讓這事情做得更容易些。
06:51
We can make it easier for people to ask for help.
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我們可以讓人們更願意去尋求幫助。
06:53
A couple colleagues and I studied hospitals.
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我和一些同事學對醫院進行了研究。
我們發現在一些特定的樓層, 護士會做很多尋求幫助的事,
06:56
We found that on certain floors, nurses did a lot of help-seeking,
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06:59
and on other floors, they did very little of it.
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在其它樓層,他們很少那樣做。
07:01
The factor that stood out on the floors where help-seeking was common,
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那些把尋求幫助視為常態的樓層,
07:04
where it was the norm,
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是因為那裡有一個只做 一件事的護士,
07:06
was there was just one nurse whose sole job it was
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07:08
to help other nurses on the unit.
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那就是專門負責幫助 單位內的其他護士。
07:10
When that role was available,
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當那個角色存在的時候,
07:11
nurses said, "It's not embarrassing, it's not vulnerable to ask for help --
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護士們會想:「哦, 找人幫忙並不是可恥的事,
也不會令人自覺軟弱, 反之更受到激勵。」
07:15
it's actually encouraged."
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07:18
Help-seeking isn't important just for protecting the success
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尋求幫助的重要性, 不僅是只有提供「施者」保護而已,
對「施者」 的福利亦然。
07:21
and the well-being of givers.
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07:22
It's also critical to getting more people to act like givers,
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對於促使更多的人, 學習成為「施者」也是很關鍵。
07:25
because the data say
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因為由數據中可以看出,
07:26
that somewhere between 75 and 90 percent of all giving in organizations
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組織中的給予行為, 有 75% 至 90%
是由尋求協助開始。
07:30
starts with a request.
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07:31
But a lot of people don't ask.
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但是很多人不會開口。
07:33
They don't want to look incompetent,
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他們不想被認為能力不足,
07:35
they don't know where to turn, they don't want to burden others.
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他們不知道該向誰尋求幫助, 他們不想給別人造成負擔。
07:38
Yet if nobody ever asks for help,
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然而如果沒有人尋求幫助,
在組織中會有很多失落的「施者」,
07:40
you have a lot of frustrated givers in your organization
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07:42
who would love to step up and contribute,
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他們很想主動幫助別人,
07:44
if they only knew who could benefit and how.
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只要有人告訴他誰需要幫助, 和如何去幫助別人。
07:47
But I think the most important thing,
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但我想最重要的事情,
07:49
if you want to build a culture of successful givers,
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如果你想營造一個 「施者」成功的文化,
07:51
is to be thoughtful about who you let onto your team.
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必須思慮周全的選擇適當的團隊。
07:54
I figured, you want a culture of productive generosity,
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我猜你想創造一個非常慷慨的文化,
07:57
you should hire a bunch of givers.
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你應該聘請一批「施者」才對。
07:59
But I was surprised to discover, actually, that that was not right --
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但我驚訝的發現 那樣做其實是不對的。
08:03
that the negative impact of a taker on a culture
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「取者」對文化的負面影響,
08:06
is usually double to triple the positive impact of a giver.
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通常會是「施者」 正面影響的 2~3 倍。
08:09
Think about it this way:
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試著這樣想:
08:10
one bad apple can spoil a barrel,
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一個壞蘋果會毀了一桶蘋果,
08:12
but one good egg just does not make a dozen.
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但是一顆好雞蛋, 不會把一打壞雞蛋變好。
08:15
I don't know what that means --
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我不知道這是什麼意思……
08:17
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
08:18
But I hope you do.
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但是我希望你們明白。
絕對不可以讓「取者」進入團隊, 哪怕是只有一位。
08:20
No -- let even one taker into a team,
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08:23
and you will see that the givers will stop helping.
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因為那樣的話, 「施者」會停止幫助別人。
08:26
They'll say, "I'm surrounded by a bunch of snakes and sharks.
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他們會說:「我被蛇和鯊魚包圍著,
08:29
Why should I contribute?"
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我為什麼需要付出?」
08:30
Whereas if you let one giver into a team,
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然而你讓一個「施者」進入團隊,
08:32
you don't get an explosion of generosity.
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你團隊裡的慷慨行為 不會因此而爆增,
更多情況下,人們會說:
08:35
More often, people are like,
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08:36
"Great! That person can do all our work."
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「太好了!
這個人可以包下我們 所有的工作了。」
08:39
So, effective hiring and screening and team building
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所以,有效的聘僱、 篩選和團隊建構,
08:41
is not about bringing in the givers;
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不是引入更多的「施者」;
而是要將重點放在把 「取者」剔除掉!
08:44
it's about weeding out the takers.
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如果你能把這件事做得很好,
08:47
If you can do that well,
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08:48
you'll be left with givers and matchers.
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你會只留下「施者」和「對等者」。
「施者」會變得更開放自在,
08:50
The givers will be generous
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08:51
because they don't have to worry about the consequences.
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因為他們不用擔心後果。
「對等者」的好處是 他們會跟著規範走。
08:54
And the beauty of the matchers is that they follow the norm.
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08:57
So how do you catch a taker before it's too late?
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那麼如何在太晚之前 找出那個「取者」?
09:00
We're actually pretty bad at figuring out who's a taker,
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我們其實不善於辨識誰是「取者」,
09:03
especially on first impressions.
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特別是憑藉第一印象。
09:05
There's a personality trait that throws us off.
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但有一個特徵可以暴露他的本性,
09:07
It's called agreeableness,
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它被稱為「友善度。」
在各種文化中都有這種人的特徵。
09:09
one the major dimensions of personality across cultures.
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09:11
Agreeable people are warm and friendly, they're nice, they're polite.
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友善度高的人通常較熱情友善,
他們很善良且都很有禮貌。
你會在加拿大找到很多這樣的人。
09:15
You find a lot of them in Canada --
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(笑聲)
09:17
(Laughter)
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09:18
Where there was actually a national contest
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加拿大舉辦了一個全國性的競賽,
09:22
to come up with a new Canadian slogan and fill in the blank,
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來為加拿大設計一個新口號,
題目就是:「作為加拿大人……」
09:25
"As Canadian as ..."
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09:26
I thought the winning entry was going to be,
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我以為冠軍的答案是,
加拿大人就像是 「楓糖漿」或「曲棍球。」
09:29
"As Canadian as maple syrup," or, "... ice hockey."
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但這些都不是, 加拿大人票選出的新國家口號是──
09:31
But no, Canadians voted for their new national slogan to be --
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不是開你的玩笑,
09:34
I kid you not --
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「在各種情況下, 盡量表現得像加拿大人。」
09:35
"As Canadian as possible under the circumstances."
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09:38
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
現在對於你們當中特別友善的人,
09:42
Now for those of you who are highly agreeable,
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或多少像個加拿大人的人來說,
09:44
or maybe slightly Canadian,
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09:45
you get this right away.
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你們應該知道我在說甚麼吧!
09:47
How could I ever say I'm any one thing
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我怎麼可能是一個什麼固定樣的人, 如果我不停地嘗試去取悅別人?
09:49
when I'm constantly adapting to try to please other people?
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09:52
Disagreeable people do less of it.
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不友善的人通常很少這樣子做,
09:54
They're more critical, skeptical, challenging,
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他們更加的苛刻、 多疑、具有攻擊性,
09:57
and far more likely than their peers to go to law school.
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而且遠比他的同儕 更可能去讀法學系。
10:00
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
10:01
That's not a joke, that's actually an empirical fact.
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這不是一個玩笑,這是經驗之談。
(笑聲)
10:04
(Laughter)
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10:05
So I always assumed that agreeable people were givers
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所以我經常假設; 友善的人都是屬於「施者」,
10:07
and disagreeable people were takers.
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不友善的人是「取者」。
10:09
But then I gathered the data,
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但當我收集數據後,
10:11
and I was stunned to find no correlation between those traits,
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我驚訝的發現兩者之間沒有關聯,
10:14
because it turns out that agreeableness-disagreeableness
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因為友善與不友善是你的外在裝飾:
10:17
is your outer veneer:
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跟你接觸的快樂值是多少?
10:18
How pleasant is it to interact with you?
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但給予和獲取則是你內在的動機:
10:20
Whereas giving and taking are more of your inner motives:
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10:22
What are your values? What are your intentions toward others?
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你對他人的價值是什麼? 你對他人的意圖是什麼?
所以如果你想準確的判斷一個人,
10:25
If you really want to judge people accurately,
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你需要等到屋內 每個咨詢顧問期盼的那一刻,
10:28
you have to get to the moment every consultant in the room is waiting for,
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然後畫一個像螢幕中的 2*2 的表格,
10:31
and draw a two-by-two.
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10:32
(Laughter)
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(螢幕中 2*2 表格內容)
上列:「施者」、「取者」
左欄:「友善度」 、「不友善度」
10:37
The agreeable givers are easy to spot:
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配合度友善的人是非常容易辨別的:
10:39
they say yes to everything.
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他們對每件事都點頭。(魯肉王)
10:43
The disagreeable takers are also recognized quickly,
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不友善的人也很容易被辨識,
10:46
although you might call them by a slightly different name.
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你可能會用一個稍微不同的名字;
10:50
(Laughter)
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(白卜庭)
(笑聲)
10:53
We forget about the other two combinations.
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我們忘記了另外兩種組合。
10:55
There are disagreeable givers in our organizations.
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在組織中有許多不友善的「施者」。
10:59
There are people who are gruff and tough on the surface
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他們表面上看來粗暴和強硬,
11:01
but underneath have others' best interests at heart.
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但是內心裡也有替人設想的想法。
用工程師的話說: 「配合度不高的施者──
11:05
Or as an engineer put it,
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11:06
"Oh, disagreeable givers --
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就像操作界面很差, 但作業系統超棒。」
11:08
like somebody with a bad user interface but a great operating system."
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11:12
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
11:13
If that helps you.
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如果這種比喻對你有幫助的話。
11:14
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
11:16
Disagreeable givers are the most undervalued people in our organizations,
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不友善的「施者」, 是組織中最被低估價值的人。
11:19
because they're the ones who give the critical feedback
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因為他們是那種一針見血的回饋者,
沒人喜歡聽,但每人都需要聽。
11:22
that no one wants to hear but everyone needs to hear.
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11:25
We need to do a much better job valuing these people
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在評價這些人的時候, 我們必需做得更好一點,
11:27
as opposed to writing them off early,
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以免過早剔除掉他們,
11:29
and saying, "Eh, kind of prickly,
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並且說:「真會吹毛求疵, 他一定是個自私的『取者』。」
11:31
must be a selfish taker."
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11:33
The other combination we forget about is the deadly one --
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另一個我們忘記的組合 是殺手級的……
11:36
the agreeable taker, also known as the faker.
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友善的「取者」,亦稱為「偽者」。
11:40
This is the person who's nice to your face,
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這些人當著你面非常好,
11:42
and then will stab you right in the back.
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但是他會背地捅你一刀。
11:44
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
11:46
And my favorite way to catch these people in the interview process
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我最喜歡在面試時分辨人的方法,
11:49
is to ask the question,
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就是提出一個問題:
「你能說出四位曾在職場上 受你幫助而事業獲得改善的人嗎?」
11:51
"Can you give me the names of four people
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11:53
whose careers you have fundamentally improved?"
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11:56
The takers will give you four names,
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「取者」會告訴你四個名字,
11:58
and they will all be more influential than them,
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而且都是比他有影響力的人。
因為「取者」擅長於拍馬屁, 然後過河拆橋。
12:01
because takers are great at kissing up and then kicking down.
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12:04
Givers are more likely to name people who are below them in a hierarchy,
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「施者」較會提出職位 比他們低的人名,
12:08
who don't have as much power,
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那些人沒有很多權力,
12:09
who can do them no good.
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對「施者」也沒什麼好處。
12:11
And let's face it, you all know you can learn a lot about character
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讓我們坦白點,你們都知道;
透過觀察人們對待餐廳服務員, 或「優步」司機的態度,
12:14
by watching how someone treats their restaurant server
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我們就可以了解一個人的個性。
12:17
or their Uber driver.
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12:19
So if we do all this well,
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因此,如果我們妥善的處理,
12:20
if we can weed takers out of organizations,
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如果我們可以將「取者」 剔除在組織外面,
12:22
if we can make it safe to ask for help,
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如果我們可以讓 尋求幫助變得很安全,
12:24
if we can protect givers from burnout
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如果我們能夠不讓 「施者」產生倦怠感,
12:26
and make it OK for them to be ambitious in pursuing their own goals
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讓他們敢於追求他們自己的目標,
12:29
as well as trying to help other people,
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並且勇於嘗試幫助他人,
我們就可以改變人們 對於成功的定義。
12:32
we can actually change the way that people define success.
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與其說成功只是 有關贏取競爭的勝利,
12:35
Instead of saying it's all about winning a competition,
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12:38
people will realize success is really more about contribution.
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不如大家將成功的重點關注在, 人們對他人的「奉獻」。
12:42
I believe that the most meaningful way to succeed
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我覺得最有意義的成功方式, 就是「成功不必在我」的精神。
12:45
is to help other people succeed.
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如果我們可以將這個觀點擴散,
12:47
And if we can spread that belief,
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12:48
we can actually turn paranoia upside down.
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我們可以逆轉那種疑神疑鬼現象。
12:51
There's a name for that.
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有個名稱很適合形容它:
12:52
It's called "pronoia."
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叫做「別人都對我好」。
「別人都對我好」是一種幻覺,
12:55
Pronoia is the delusional belief
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12:56
that other people are plotting your well-being.
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覺得其他人都是你的貴人。
12:59
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
13:02
That they're going around behind your back
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他們會躲在你的背後,
13:05
and saying exceptionally glowing things about you.
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談論關於你無比光彩的事蹟。
13:09
The great thing about a culture of givers is that's not a delusion --
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由「施者」主導的文化好處在於,
那並不是一個幻覺,而是一種實現。
13:13
it's reality.
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13:15
I want to live in a world where givers succeed,
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我想生活在一個 「施者」成功的世界。
13:18
and I hope you will help me create that world.
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我希望你們能幫我創造那個世界。
13:20
Thank you.
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謝謝。
13:21
(Applause)
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(掌聲)
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