Joshua Walters: On being just crazy enough

Translator: Laura T. Reviewer: Kristaps Kadiķis

My name is Joshua Walters.

Mans vārds ir Džošua Volterss.

I'm a performer.

Esmu mākslinieks.

(Beatboxing)

(Bītbokss)

(Laughter)

(Smiekli)

(Applause)

(Aplausi)

But as far as being a performer,

Bet es esmu ne tikai mākslinieks,

I'm also diagnosed

man ir arī diagnosticēta

bipolar.

bipolārisms.

I reframe that as a positive

Es to uzskatu par pozitīvu lietu,

because the crazier I get onstage,

tāpēc, jo trakāks es kļūstu uz skatuves,

the more entertaining I become.

jo es kļūstu uzjautrinošāks.

When I was 16 in San Francisco,

Sanfrancisko, kad man bija 16 gadi,

I had my breakthrough manic episode

man bija pirmā maniakālās depresijas lēkme,

in which I thought I was Jesus Christ.

kad es domāju, ka esmu Jēzus Kristus.

Maybe you thought that was scary,

Iespējams, jums tas šķiet biedējoši,

but actually there's no amount of drugs you can take

bet patiesībā nav tāda narkotiku daudzuma,

that can get you as high

ko jūs varētu uzņemt, kas jūs pacelt tik augstu,

as if you think you're Jesus Christ.

kā tad, kad domājat, ka esat Jēzus Kristus.

(Laughter)

(Smiekli)

I was sent to a place,

Mani nosūtīja uz vienu vietiņu,

a psych ward,

psihiatrisko slimnīcu,

and in the psych ward,

un psihiatriskajā slimnīcā

everyone is doing their own one-man show.

katrs piedalās savā viena aktiera izrādē.

(Laughter)

(Smiekli)

There's no audience like this

Tur nav tāda publika kā šeit,

to justify their rehearsal time.

kas attaisnotu viņu mēģinājumu laiku.

They're just practicing.

Viņi tikai trenējas.

One day they'll get here.

Kādu dienu viņi šeit nonāks.

Now when I got out,

Izklūstot no turienes,

I was diagnosed

psihiatrs man

and I was given medications

uzstādīja diagnozi

by a psychiatrist.

un izrakstīja zāles.

"Okay, Josh, why don't we give you some --

„Labi, Džoš, kādēļ gan mums jums neiedot,

why don't we give you some Zyprexa.

kādēļ gan mums neiedot jums Zyprexa.

Okay? Mmhmm?

Labi? Mmhmm?

At least that's what it says on my pen."

Vismaz tā ir rakstīts uz manas pildspalvas.”

(Laughter)

(Smiekli)

Some of you are in the field, I can see.

Daži no jums ir ārā, es redzu.

I can feel your noise.

Es jūtu jūsu skaņu.

The first half of high school

Vidusskolas pirmā puse

was the struggle of the manic episode,

bija cīņa ar maniakālās depresijas lēkmēm,

and the second half

un otrā puse

was the overmedications of these drugs,

bija šo zāļu pārdozēšana,

where I was sleeping through high school.

kad es visu vidusskolas laiku nogulēju.

The second half was just one big nap, pretty much, in class.

Otrā puse lielākoties bija viena liela snauda klasē.

When I got out

Tiekot ārā,

I had a choice.

man bija izvēle.

I could either deny

Es varēju vai nu noliegt

my mental illness

savu garīgo slimību

or embrace

vai pieņemt

my mental skillness.

savu garīgo meistarību.

(Bugle sound)

(Taures skaņa)

There's a movement going on right now

Šobrīd ir sākusies kāda kustība,

to reframe mental illness as a positive --

lai atzītu garīgu slimību kā pozitīvu,

at least the hypomanic edge part of it.

vismaz tās hipomānisko daļu.

Now if you don't know what hypomania is,

Ja nezināt, kas ir hipomānija,

it's like an engine that's out of control,

tas ir kā dzinējs, ko nevar kontrolēt,

maybe a Ferrari engine, with no breaks.

varbūt Ferrari dzinējs, bez bremzēm.

Many of the speakers here, many of you in the audience,

Daudziem no runātājiem, daudziem no jums publikā

have that creative edge,

ir šī radošais ķēriens,

if you know what I'm talking about.

ja saprotat, ko ar to domāju.

You're driven to do something

Jūs gribat izdarīt kaut ko,

that everyone has told you is impossible.

par ko visi ir jums teikuši, ka tas nav iespējams.

And there's a book -- John Gartner.

Ir grāmata... Džons Gārdners.

John Gartner wrote this book called "The Hypomanic Edge"

Džons Gārdners uzrakstīja grāmatu „Hipomāniskais ķēriens”,

in which Christopher Columbus and Ted Turner and Steve Jobs

kurā Kristoferam Kolumbam, Tedam Tērneram, Stīvam Džobsam,

and all these business minds

un visiem šiem uzņēmējiem

have this edge to compete.

ir tieksme sacensties.

A different book was written not too long ago

Ne pārāk sen, 90. gadu vidū,

in the mid-90s

tika uzrakstīta cita grāmata.

called "Touched With Fire" by Kay Redfield Jamison

Keja Redfīlda Džeimisona „Ar uguni skarts”,

in which it was looked at in a creative sense

kurā to aplūkoja radošajā ziņā,

in which Mozart and Beethoven and Van Gogh

kurā gan Mocartam, gan Bēthovenam, gan Van Gogam

all have this manic depression that they were suffering with.

bijusi maniakālā depresija, ar ko viņi slimojuši.

Some of them committed suicide.

Daži no viņiem izdarīja pašnāvību.

So it wasn't all

Tātad, šai slimībai

the good side of the illness.

nav tikai labā puse.

Now recently,

Nesen

there's been development in this field.

šajā lauciņā bijusi attīstība.

And there was an article written in the New York Times,

2010. gada septembrī New York Times

September 2010,

bija raksts,

that stated:

kur teica:

"Just Manic Enough."

„Pietiekami maniakāls.”

Just be manic enough

Esi pietiekami maniakāls,

in which investors who are looking for entrepreneurs

kurā investori meklē uzņēmējus,

that have this kind of spectrum --

kuriem ir šāda veida spektrs,

you know what I'm talking about --

jūs saprotiet, par ko es runāju,

not maybe full bipolar,

varbūt ne pilnīgi bipolārus,

but they're in the bipolar spectrum --

bet viņi ir bipolārajā spektrā,

where on one side,

kur no vienas puses,

maybe you think you're Jesus,

tu varbūt domā, ka esi Jēzus,

and on the other side

bet no otras puses,

maybe they just make you a lot of money.

viņi varbūt tev vienkārši nopelna daudz naudas.

(Laughter)

(Smiekli)

Your call. Your call.

Jūsu izvēle. Jūsu izvēle.

And everyone's somewhere in the middle.

Visi ir kaut kur pa vidu.

Everyone's somewhere in the middle.

Ikviens ir kaut kur pa vidu.

So maybe, you know,

Tad, ziniet, varbūt

there's no such thing

nav tādas lietas

as crazy,

kā trakums,

and being diagnosed with a mental illness

un diagnosticēta garīga slimība,

doesn't mean you're crazy.

nenozīmē, ka esi traks.

But maybe it just means

Varbūt tas vienkārši nozīmē,

you're more sensitive

ka esi daudz jūtīgāks

to what most people can't see

pret to, ko vairums cilvēku nemana

or feel.

vai nejūt.

Maybe no one's really crazy.

Varbūt neviens nav patiešām traks.

Everyone is just a little bit mad.

Visi ir tikai nedaudz ķerti.

How much

Cik ļoti,

depends on where you fall in the spectrum.

atkarīgs no tā, kur atrodies spektrā.

How much

Cik ļoti,

depends on how lucky you are.

atkarīgs no tā, cik ļoti tev paveicas.

Thank you.

Paldies.

(Applause)

(Aplausi)