Becky Blanton: The year I was homeless

Translator: Lenka Gondolova Reviewer: Miriam Matejova

I'm a writer and a journalist,

Som spisovateľka a novinárka,

and I'm also an insanely curious person,

a tiež som šialene zvedavá.

so in 22 years as a journalist,

Ako novinárka som sa za 22 rokov

I've learned how to do a lot of new things.

naučila mnoho nových vecí.

And three years ago, one of the things I learned how to do

A pred tromi rokmi som sa naučila

was to become invisible.

ako sa stať neviditeľnou.

I became one of the working homeless.

Stala som sa jednou z pracujúcich bezdomovcov.

I quit my job as a newspaper editor

Nechala som prácu redaktorky potom,

after my father died in February of that same year,

ako mi vo februári toho istého roku zomrel otec,

and decided to travel.

a rozhodla sa cestovať.

His death hit me pretty hard.

Jeho smrť ma veľmi silno zasiahla

And there were a lot of things that I wanted to feel and deal with while I was doing that.

a počas cestovania som chcela naplno precítiť všetky svoje pocity a myšlienky.

I've camped my whole life. And I decided

Kempovala som celý život. Myslela som si,

that living in a van for a year to do this

že rok života v dodávke

would be like one long camping trip.

bude ako dlhý kempovací výlet.

So I packed my cat, my Rottweiler

A tak som zbalila mačku, rotvailera,

and my camping gear into a 1975 Chevy van,

a svoju kempingovú výstroj do 30-ročného Chevroletu

and drove off into the sunset,

a vyrazila smerom k zapadajúcemu slnku,

having fully failed to realize three critical things.

pričom mi na um nezišli tri dôležité veci.

One: that society equates

Po prvé: že spoločnosť vníma ako hodnotných

living in a permanent structure, even a shack,

len tých ľudí, čo žijú v nejakej budove

with having value as a person.

alebo aspoň chatrči.

Two: I failed to realize how quickly

Po druhé: ako rýchlo,

the negative perceptions of other people

môže negatívny pohľad iných ľudí

can impact our reality, if we let it.

ovplyvniť našu vlastnú realitu, ak im to dovolíme.

Three: I failed to realize

Po tretie: neuvedomila som si

that homelessness is an attitude,

že bezdomovectvo je životný postoj,

not a lifestyle.

nie životný štýl.

At first, living in the van was great.

Spočiatku bol život v dodávke perfektný.

I showered in campgrounds. I ate out regularly.

Sprchovala som sa v kempoch. Pravidelne som jedávala v reštauráciách.

And I had time to relax and to grieve.

Mala som čas odpočívať aj smútiť.

But then the anger and the depression about my father's death set in.

Ale potom sa dostavil hnev a depresia z otcovej smrti.

My freelance job ended. And I had to get a full-time job

Moja nezávislá práca skončila, a musela som si nájsť stále zamestnanie,

to pay the bills.

aby som mala z čoho platiť účty.

What had been a really mild spring

Mierna jar

turned into a miserably hot summer.

prešla do neskutočne horúceho leta.

And it became impossible to park anywhere --

Nedalo sa len tak zaparkovať

(Laughs)

(smiech)

-- without being very obvious

bez toho, aby bolo jasné,

that I had a cat and a dog with me, and it was really hot.

že mám so sebou mačku a psa. Bolo strašne horúco.

The cat came and went through an open window in the van.

Mačka prichádzala a odchádzala cez otvorené okno v dodávke.

The doggy went into doggy day care.

Psíka som dala do psieho hotela.

And I sweated.

A ja som sa potila.

Whenever I could, I used

Kedykoľvek som mohla, využíla som sprchy

employee showers in office buildings and truck stops.

pre zamestnancov v kancelárskych budovách a na parkoviskách pre kamióny.

Or I washed up in public rest rooms.

Alebo som sa umývala na verejných záchodoch.

Nighttime temperatures in the van rarely dropped below 80 degrees Fahrenheit,

Nočné teploty klesli pod 27 °C len zriedkavo.

making it difficult or impossible to sleep.

Zaspať bolo ťažké až nemožné.

Food rotted in the heat.

Jedlo sa v teple kazilo.

Ice in my ice chest melted within hours,

Ľad sa mi v prenosnej chladničke roztopil v priebehu niekoľkých hodín.

and it was pretty miserable.

Bolo to naozaj zúfalé.

I couldn't afford to find an apartment,

Nemohla som si dovoliť prenajať byt.

or couldn't afford an apartment that would allow me

Alebo som si nemohla zobrať psa a mačku do takých,

to have the Rottweiler and the cat.

ktoré som si dovoliť mohla.

And I refused to give them up,

Odmietla som sa ich vzdať,

so I stayed in the van.

a tak som ostala v dodávke.

And when the heat made me too sick

Keď mi z tepla bolo natoľko zle,

to walk the 50 feet to the public restroom

že som v noci neprešla z dodávky

outside my van at night,

ani 15 metrov na verejné záchody,

I used a bucket and a trash bag as a toilet.

použila som vedro a vrece na odpadky.

When winter weather set in, the temperatures dropped

Keď prišla zima, teploty klesli

below freezing. And they stayed there.

pod bod mrazu. A ostali tam.

And I faced a whole new set of challenges.

Čelila som celkom novým výzvam.

I parked a different place every night

Každú noc som parkovala na inom mieste,

so I would avoid being noticed and hassled by the police.

aby si ma nevšimla polícia.

I didn't always succeed.

Nie vždy sa mi to podarilo.

But I felt out of control of my life.

Cítila som, že strácam kontrolu nad životom.

And I don't know when or how it happened,

Neviem, kedy ani ako sa to stalo,

but the speed at which I went

ale rýchlosť,

from being a talented writer and journalist

ktorou sa z talentovanej spisovateľky a žurnalistky

to being a homeless woman, living in a van,

stala bezdomovkyňa žijúca v dodávke,

took my breath away.

mi vyrazila dych.

I hadn't changed. My I.Q. hadn't dropped.

Nezmenila som sa. Neznížilo sa ani moje IQ.

My talent, my integrity, my values,

Môj talent, moja integrita, moje hodnoty,

everything about me remained the same.

všetko ostalo rovnaké.

But I had changed somehow.

Napriek tomu som bola iná.

I spiraled deeper and deeper into a depression.

Padala som hlbšie a hlbšie do depresie.

And eventually someone referred me to a homeless health clinic.

Napokon mi niekto odporučil kliniku pre bezdomovcov.

And I went. I hadn't bathed in three days.

Išla som tam. Nesprchovala som sa tri dni.

I was as smelly and as depressed as anyone in line.

Smrdela som a bola som v rovnakej depresii ako všetci čakajúci.

I just wasn't drunk or high.

Akurát som nebola opitá alebo na drogách.

And when several of the homeless men realized that,

Keď si to niekoľkí z bezdomovcov, vrátane

including a former university professor,

bývalého univerzitného profesora, všimli

they said, "You aren't homeless. Why are you really here?"

povedali, "Vy nie ste bezdomovkyňa. Čo tu robíte?"

Other homeless people didn't see me as homeless,

Ostatní bezdomovci ma nevideli ako bezdomovkyňu,

but I did.

ale ja seba áno.

Then the professor listened to my story and he said,

Potom si profesor vypočul môj príbeh a povedal,

"You have a job. You have hope.

"Máte prácu. Máte nádej.

The real homeless don't have hope."

Skutoční bezdomovci nemajú nádej."

A reaction to the medication the clinic gave me for my depression

Z antidepresív, ktoré mi dali na klinike som mala

left me suicidal. And I remember thinking,

samovražedné sklony. Pamätám si, ako som si pomyslela,

"If I killed myself, no one would notice."

"Ak sa teraz zabijem, nikto si to ani len nevšimne."

A friend told me, shortly after that,

Kamarátka mi krátko na to povedala,

that she had heard that Tim Russert,

že počula ako Tim Russert,

a nationally renowned journalist,

celonárodne uznávaný novinár,

had been talking about me on national T.V.

o mne rozprával v národnej televízii.

An essay I'd written about my father,

Esej, ktorú som napísala o svojom otcovi

the year before he died, was in Tim's new book.

rok pred jeho smrťou, bola uverejnená v Timovej knihe.

And he was doing the talk show circuit. And he was talking about my writing.

Práve robil turné po televíziách a hovoril o nej.

And when I realized that Tim Russert, former moderator of "Meet the Press,"

Keď som si uvedomila, že Tim Russert, bývalý moderátor relácie Meet the Press (Stretnutie s novinármi),

was talking about my writing,

hovoril o mojej eseji,

while I was living in a van in a Wal-Mart parking lot,

zatial čo ja som žila v dodávke na parkovisku pred Wal-Martom,

I started laughing.

začala som sa smiať.

You should too.

A vy by ste sa mali tiež.

(Laughter)

(Smiech)

I started laughing

Smiala som sa,

because it got to the point where,

lebo som zrazu nevedela,

was I a writer, or was I a homeless woman?

či som spisovateľka alebo bezdomovkyňa.

So I went in the bookstore. And I found Tim's book.

Zašla som do kníhkupectva a vyhľadala Timovu knihu.

And I stood there. And I reread my essay.

Stála som tam a znovu si čítala svoju esej.

And I cried.

Rozplakala som sa.

Because I was a writer.

Lebo JA som bola spisovateľka.

I was a writer.

Bola som spisovateľka.

Shortly after that I moved back to Tennessee.

Krátko nato som sa presťahovala späť do Tennessee.

I alternated between living in a van and couch surfing with friends.

Striedavo som prespávala vo svojej dodávke a u priateľov na gauči.

And I started writing again.

Znovu som začala písať.

By the summer of the following year I was a working journalist.

Do nasledujúceho leta som opäť pracovala ako novinárka.

I was winning awards. I was living in my own apartment.

Získavala som ocenenia. Žila som vo vlastnom byte.

I was no longer homeless.

Už som nebola bez domova.

And I was no longer invisible.

Nebola som viac neviditeľná.

Thousands of people work full and part-time jobs,

Tisíce ľudí pracujú na plný či polovičný úväzok,

and live in their cars.

pričom žijú vo svojich autách.

But society continues to stigmatize and criminalize

Ale spoločnosť naďalej hanobí a ilegalizuje

living in your vehicle or on the streets.

život v aute na ulici.

So the homeless, the working homeless, primarily remain invisible.

A tak bezdomovci, pracujúci bezdomovci, zostávajú neviditeľnými.

But if you ever meet one,

Ale ak raz jedného stretnete,

engage them, encourage them, and offer them hope.

všimnite si ho, posmeľte ho, dajte mu nádej.

The human spirit can overcome anything if it has hope.

Ľudská duša prekoná čokoľvek, ak má nádej.

And I'm not here to be the poster girl for the homeless.

Nie som tu, aby som bezdomovcov obhajovala.

I'm not here to encourage you to give money to the next panhandler you meet.

Ani vás nenabádam, aby ste dali peniaze prvému žobrákovi, ktorého stretnete.

But I am here to tell you that, based on my experience,

Ale som tu, aby som vám na základe vlastnej skúsenosti povedala,

people are not where they live,

že ľudia nie sú tým, kde žijú,

where they sleep,

kde spia,

or what their life situation is at any given time.

alebo aká je ich momentálna životná situácia.

Three years ago I was living in a van

Pred tromi rokmi som žila v dodávke

in a Wal-Mart parking lot,

na parkovisku pred Wal-Martom.

and today I'm speaking at TED.

Dnes prednášam na TEDe.

Hope always, always finds a way. Thank you.

Nádej si vždy, vždy nájde cestu. Ďakujem.

(Applause)

(Potlesk)