What I learned from 100 days of rejection | Jia Jiang | TED

Translator: Lina Marza Reviewer: Azfa A

When I was six years old,

Saat saya berusia enam tahun,

I received my gifts.

saya mendapatkan hadiah.

My first grade teacher had this brilliant idea.

Guru saya saat kelas satu SD punya ide brilian

She wanted us to experience receiving gifts

Dia ingin kami merasakan menerima hadiah

but also learning the virtue of complimenting each other.

sekaligus belajar untuk saling memuji satu sama lain.

So she had all of us come to the front of the classroom,

Jadi dia memanggil kami semua ke depan kelas,

and she bought all of us gifts and stacked them in the corner.

dan dia membelikan kami hadiah dan menumpuknya di sudut kelas.

And she said,

lalu dia berkata,

"Why don't we just stand here and compliment each other?

“Nanti kalian ke depan dan saling memuji ya?

If you hear your name called,

Kalau mendengar nama kalian disebut,

go and pick up your gift and sit down."

ambil hadiahnya, lalu duduk kembali.”

What a wonderful idea, right?

Ide yang bagus, bukan?

What could go wrong?

Hal salah apa yang mungkin terjadi?

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

Well, there were 40 of us to start with,

Kami saat itu ada 40 orang,

and every time I heard someone's name called,

dan setiap saya mendengar nama teman saya dipanggil,

I would give out the heartiest cheer.

Saya akan memberinya semangat yang paling tulus.

And then there were 20 people left,

Sampai hanya 20 orang yang tersisa,

and 10 people left,

lalu 10 orang,

and five left ...

lalu lima,

and three left.

lalu tiga.

And I was one of them.

Dan saya salah satu dari mereka.

And the compliments stopped.

Dan pujianpun berhenti.

Well, at that moment, I was crying.

Tentu saja saya menangis saat itu.

And the teacher was freaking out.

Dan guru kami panik.

She was like, "Hey, would anyone say anything nice about these people?"

Dia berkata; “Ayo, siapa yang mau memuji teman-teman kalian ini?”

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

"No one? OK, why don't you go get your gift and sit down.

“Tidak ada? Oke, ambil saja hadiah kalian, lalu duduk kembali.

So behave next year --

Tapi tahun depan berperilaku baik ya--

someone might say something nice about you."

supaya kalian bisa dipuji.”

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

Well, as I'm describing this you,

Seperti yang saya ceritakan,

you probably know I remember this really well.

kalian bisa tahu, saya tidak bisa melupakannya.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

But I don't know who felt worse that day.

Tapi saya tidak tahu siapa yang merasa lebih buruk hari itu.

Was it me or the teacher?

Apa itu saya, atau guru saya?

She must have realized that she turned a team-building event

Dia mungkin sadar, sudah mengubah acara kekompakan

into a public roast for three six-year-olds.

menjadi ledekan publik untuk anak umur enam tahun.

And without the humor.

Dan tidak ada lucunya.

You know, when you see people get roasted on TV,

Tahukan, kalau kita melihat orang diledek di TV,

it was funny.

itu lucu.

There was nothing funny about that day.

Tapi hari itu tidak lucu sama sekali.

So that was one version of me,

Jadi itulah satu versi dari diri saya,

and I would die to avoid being in that situation again --

dan saya lebih baik mati daripada berada di situasi itu lagi --

to get rejected in public again.

ditolak didepan umum lagi.

That's one version.

Itu satu versi.

Then fast-forward eight years.

Kita maju delapan tahun kemudian.

Bill Gates came to my hometown --

Biil Gates datang ke kampung halaman saya --

Beijing, China --

Beijing, Cina --

to speak,

untuk berbicara,

and I saw his message.

dan saya memahami pesannya.

I fell in love with that guy.

Saya terpesona pada pria itu.

I thought, wow, I know what I want to do now.

Saya pikir, wow, sekarang saya tahu ingin melakukan apa.

That night I wrote a letter to my family

Malam itu, saya menulis surat pada keluarga saya

telling them: "By age 25,

yang isinya: “Saat berumur 25,

I will build the biggest company in the world,

saya akan membangun perusahaan terbesar di sunia,

dan perusahaan itu akan membeli Microsoft.”

and that company will buy Microsoft."

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

I totally embraced this idea of conquering the world --

Saya benar-benar memiliki ide untuk menaklukan --

domination, right?

kekuasaan dunia.

And I didn't make this up, I did write that letter.

Dan saya tidak mengarang ini, saya memang menulis surat itu.

Dan inilah dia.

And here it is --

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

You don't have to read this through --

Kalian tidak usah membacanya --

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

Tulisannya juga jelek, tapi saya menandai beberapa kata kunci.

This is also bad handwriting, but I did highlight some key words.

You get the idea.

Kalian bisa lihat intinya.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

So ...

Jadi ...

that was another version of me:

itulah versi lain diri saya:

one who will conquer the world.

seseorang yang akan menguasai dunia.

Well, then two years later,

Lalu, dua tahun kemudian,

I was presented with the opportunity to come to the United States.

Saya berkesempatan untuk datang ke Amerika.

I jumped on it,

Saya langsung mengambilnya,

because that was where Bill Gates lived, right?

karena Bill Gates tinggal di sana, kan?

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

I thought that was the start of my entrepreneur journey.

Saya pikir itulah awal perjalanan saya sebagai pengusaha.

Then, fast-forward another 14 years.

Lalu, maju ke 14 tahun kemudian.

I was 30.

Saya berumur 30.

Nope, I didn't build that company.

Tidak, saya tidak membangun perusahaan itu.

I didn't even start.

Saya bahkan tidak memulainya.

I was actually a marketing manager for a Fortune 500 company.

Saya malah jadi manejer pemasaran di perusahaan Fortune 500.

And I felt I was stuck;

Dan saya merasa buntu.

I was stagnant.

Saya tidak bergerak ke mana-mana.

Why is that?

Mengapa begitu?

Where is that 14-year-old who wrote that letter?

Ke mana anak 14 tahun yang menulis surat itu?

It's not because he didn't try.

Itu bukan karena saya tidak mencoba.

It's because every time I had a new idea,

Itu karena setiap saya punya ide,

every time I wanted to try something new,

setiap saya ingin mencoba sesuatu yang baru

even at work --

bahkan di tempat kerja --

I wanted to make a proposal,

saya ingin membuat proposal,

I wanted to speak up in front of people in a group --

saya ingin berbicara di depan orang --

I felt there was this constant battle

saya terus merasakan ada pertarungan batin

between the 14-year-old and the six-year-old.

antara saya yang berumur 14 tahun dan yang berumur enam tahun.

One wanted to conquer the world --

Yang ingin menguasai dunia --

make a difference --

melakukan perubahan --

another was afraid of rejection.

dan yang takut pada penolakan.

And every time that six-year-old won.

Dan yang berumur enam tahun selalu menang.

And this fear even persisted after I started my own company.

Dan ketakutan ini bahkan terus ada setelah saya memulai perusahaan sendiri.

I mean, I started my own company when I was 30 --

Iya sih, saya memulai perusahaan saya saat saya 30 tahun --

if you want to be Bill Gates,

kalau Anda ingin jadi Bill Gates,

you've got to start sooner or later, right?

Anda harus memulainya cepat atau lambat, kan?

When I was an entrepreneur,

Saat saya seorang pengusaha,

I was presented with an investment opportunity,

Saya mempunyai kesempatan untuk mendapatkan investasi,

and then I was turned down.

tapi saya ditolak.

And that rejection hurt me.

Dan penolakan itu menyakiti saya.

It hurt me so bad that I wanted to quit right there.

Saya sangat terluka sampai saya ingin berhenti saat itu juga.

But then I thought,

Tapi saya lalu berpikir,

hey, would Bill Gates quit after a simple investment rejection?

memangnya Bill Gates akan berhenti setelah satu penolakan investasi?

Would any successful entrepreneur quit like that?

Apa pengusaha sukses akan berhenti seperti itu?

No way.

Tidak.

And this is where it clicked for me.

Dan saat itulah jelas bagi saya.

OK, I can build a better company.

Oke, saya bisa membuat perusahaan yang lebih baik,

I can build a better team or better product,

tim yang lebih baik, atau produk yang lebih baik,

but one thing for sure:

tapi satu lah yang pasti:

I've got to be a better leader.

saya harus jadi pemimpin yang lebih baik.

I've got to be a better person.

jadi orang yang lebih baik.

I cannot let that six-year-old keep dictating my life anymore.

Saya tidak bisa membiarkan anak enam tahun itu mendikte saya lagi.

I have to put him back in his place.

Saya harus menempatkannya kembali ke posisinya.

Jadi saat itulah saya online dan mencari bantuan.

So this is where I went online and looked for help.

Google was my friend.

Google itu teman saya.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

I searched, "How do I overcome the fear of rejection?"

Saya cari, “Bagaimana cara mengatasi ketakutan pada penolakan?”

I came up with a bunch of psychology articles

Saya menemukan sekumpulan artikel psikologi

about where the fear and pain are coming from.

tentang darimana asal ketakutan dan rasa sakit.

Then I came up with a bunch of "rah-rah" inspirational articles

Lalu saya menemukan sekumpulan artikel inspirasi

about "Don't take it personally, just overcome it."

judulnya “Jangan diambil hati, hadapi saja.”

Who doesn't know that?

Kalau itu, siapa yang tidak tahu?

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

But why was I still so scared?

Tapi kenapa saya masih takut?

Then I found this website by luck.

Lalu saya tidak sengaja menemukan sebuah situs.

It's called rejectiontherapy.com.

Namanya rejectiontherapy.com.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

"Rejection Therapy" was this game invented by this Canadian entrepreneur.

“Rejection Therapy adalah permainan yang dibuat oleh seorang pengusaha Kanada.

His name is Jason Comely.

Namanya Jason Comely.

And basically the idea is for 30 days you go out and look for rejection,

Idenya adalah selama 30 hari, Anda harus keluar dan mencari penolakan,

and every day get rejected at something,

dan setiap hari Anda harus ditolak pada satu hal,

and then by the end, you desensitize yourself from the pain.

dan pada akhirnya, Anda akan kebal terhadap penolakan.

And I loved that idea.

Dan saya suka ide tersebut.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

I said, "You know what? I'm going to do this.

Saya pikir, “Saya akan melakukan ini.

And I'll feel myself getting rejected 100 days."

Dan merasakan diri saya ditolak 100 hari.”

And I came up with my own rejection ideas,

Lalu saya mencari sendiri ide-ide penolakan,

and I made a video blog out of it.

dan membuat vidio jurnal penolakan tersebut.

And so here's what I did.

Jadi, itulah yang saya lakukan.

This is what the blog looked like.

Seperti inilah vlog tersebut.

Day One ...

Hari Pertama ...

(Tertawa)

(Laughter)

Borrow 100 dollars from a stranger.

Meminjam 100 dollar dari orang asing.

So this is where I went to where I was working.

Jadi, itulah yang saya coba di tempat saya bekerja.

I came downstairs

Saya turun

and I saw this big guy sitting behind a desk.

dan melihat pria bertubuh besar ini di belakang meja.

He looked like a security guard.

Sepertinya dia penjaga keamanan.

So I just approached him.

Jadi, saya mendekatinya.

And I was just walking

Saya berjalan

and that was the longest walk of my life --

dan itu rasanya perjalanan terlama dalam hidup saya --

hair on the back of my neck standing up,

bulu kuduk saya berdiri,

I was sweating and my heart was pounding.

Saya berkeringat dan jantung saya berdebar.

And I got there and said,

Saya lalu menghampirinya dan bertanya,

"Hey, sir, can I borrow 100 dollars from you?"

“Pak, bisakah Anda meminjamkan saya 100 dollar?”

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

And he looked up, he's like, "No."

Dia menatap saya, dan berkata, “Tidak.”

"Why?"

“Untuk apa?”

Saya hanya berkata, “Tidak bisa ya? Maaf kalau begitu.”

And I just said, "No? I'm sorry."

Then I turned around, and I just ran.

Lalu aku berbalik dan lari.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

I felt so embarrassed.

Saya merasa sangat malu.

But because I filmed myself --

Tapi karena saya merekamnya --

so that night I was watching myself getting rejected,

malam itu, saya menonton kembali bagaimana saya ditolak.

I just saw how scared I was.

saya jadi tahu betapa takutnya saya.

I looked like this kid in "The Sixth Sense."

Saya seperti anak kecil di film “The Sixth Sense.”

I saw dead people.

Saya seperti melihat hantu.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

But then I saw this guy.

Lalu saya bertemu pria tadi.

You know, he wasn't that menacing.

Tampangnya tidak terlalu mengancam.

He was a chubby, loveable guy,

Dia pria besar yang menyenangkan,

and he even asked me, "Why?"

dia bahkan bertanya pada saya, “Untuk apa?”

In fact, he invited me to explain myself.

Bahkan dia meminta saya untuk menjelaskan.

And I could've said many things.

Dan saya bisa saja mengatakan apapun.

I could've explained, I could've negotiated.

Saya bisa saja menjelaskan, bernegosiasi.

I didn't do any of that.

Saya tidak melakukan apapun.

All I did was run.

Yang saya lakukan hanya lari.

I felt, wow, this is like a microcosm of my life.

Saya pikir, wah, inilah gambaran kecil hidup saya.

Every time I felt the slightest rejection,

Setiap kali saya mengalami penolakan sekecil apapun,

I would just run as fast as I could.

Saya hanya lari secepat mungkin.

And you know what?

Dan tahukah Anda?

The next day, no matter what happens,

Hari berikutnya, apapun yang terjadi,

I'm not going to run.

Saya tidak akan lari.

I'll stay engaged.

Saya akan bertahan.

Day Two: Request a "burger refill."

Hari Kedua: Meminta “isi ulang burger.”

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

It's when I went to a burger joint,

Itu saat saya pergi ke restoran burger,

I finished lunch, and I went to the cashier and said,

Setelah menghabiskan makanan, saya ke kasir dan bertanya,

“Hai, bisakah saya minta isi ulang burger?”

"Hi, can I get a burger refill?"

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

He was all confused, like, "What's a burger refill?"

Dia kebigungan, “Apa maksudmu isi ulang burger?”

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

I said, "Well, it's just like a drink refill but with a burger."

Saya berkata, “Seperti isi ulang minuman gratis, tapi burger.”

And he said, "Sorry, we don't do burger refill, man."

Dia berkata, “Maaf, tidak ada isi ulang burger, Pak.”

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

So this is where rejection happened and I could have run, but I stayed.

Jadi begitulah penolakan terjadi, tapi kali ini saya tidak lari.

I said, "Well, I love your burgers,

Saya berkata, “Saya suka burger di sini,

I love your joint,

Kalian merek burger favorit saya,

and if you guys do a burger refill,

dan jika kalian menyediakan isi ulang burger,

I will love you guys more."

saya akan lebih menyukai kalian.”

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

And he said, "Well, OK, I'll tell my manager about it,

Dia berkata, “Oke, nanti saya sampaikan pada manejer,

and maybe we'll do it, but sorry, we can't do this today."

dan mungkin kami akan menyediakannya, tapi maaf, tidak untuk hari ini.”

Then I left.

Lalu, saya pergi.

And by the way,

Ngomong-ngomong,

saya rasa, mereka tidak akan pernah menyediakan isi ulang burger.

I don't think they've ever done burger refill.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

I think they're still there.

Saya rasa takut itu masih ada.

But the life and death feeling I was feeling the first time

Tapi perasaan antara hidup dan mati yang saya rasakan saat pertama

was no longer there,

tidak ada lagi,

just because I stayed engaged --

karena saya berusaha bertahan --

because I didn't run.

karena saya tidak lari.

I said, "Wow, great, I'm already learning things.

Saya berujar, “Wah, hebat, saya belajar hal baru.

Great."

Hebat.”

And then Day Three: Getting Olympic Doughnuts.

Lalu Hari Ketiga: Memesan Donat Olimpiade.

This is where my life was turned upside down.

Inilah saat hidup saya berubah.

I went to a Krispy Kreme.

Saya pergi ke Krispy Kreme,

It's a doughnut shop

toko donat

yang tersebar di sebagian besar tenggara Amerika.

in mainly the Southeastern part of the United States.

I'm sure they have some here, too.

Saya yakin di sini juga ada.

And I went in,

Saya masuk dan bertanya,

I said, "Can you make me doughnuts that look like Olympic symbols?

“Bisakah saya memesan donat yang bentuknya seperti simbol olimpiade?”

Basically, you interlink five doughnuts together ... "

Intinya, Anda harus menyambungkan lima buah donat...”

I mean there's no way they could say yes, right?

Tidak mungkin mereka akan mengiyakan, kan?

The doughnut maker took me so seriously.

Tapi tukang donat di sana menanggapi saya dengan serius.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

So she put out paper,

Dia mengambil selembar kertas,

started jotting down the colors and the rings,

dan menggambar warna dan lingkaran,

and is like, "How can I make this?"

dan berujar, “Bagaimana ya membuat ini?”

And then 15 minutes later,

Dan 15 menit kemudian,

she came out with a box that looked like Olympic rings.

Dia keluar dengan sekotak donat yang terlihat seperti cincin olimpiade.

And I was so touched.

Saya sangat terharu.

I just couldn't believe it.

Saya benar-benar tidak percaya.

And that video got over five million views on Youtube.

Dan vidio itu mendapatkan lebih dari lima juta penonton di Youtube.

The world couldn't believe that either.

Dunia juga tidak bisa percaya sepertinya.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

You know, because of that I was in newspapers,

Tahukah Anda, karena itu saya masuk koran,

in talk shows, in everything.

acara bincang-bincang, dan sebagainya.

And I became famous.

Dan saya jadi terkenal.

A lot of people started writing emails to me

Banyak orang mengirimi saya surel

and saying, "What you're doing is awesome."

dan berkata, “Yang Anda lakukan itu luar biasa!”

But you know, fame and notoriety did not do anything to me.

Tapi popularitas tidak berpengaruh bagi saya.

What I really wanted to do was learn,

Yang ingin saya lakukan adalah belajar

and to change myself.

dan mengubah diri saya.

Jadi saya menjadikan sisa dari 100 hari penolakan itu

So I turned the rest of my 100 days of rejection

into this playground --

sebagai ruang bereksperimen

into this research project.

sebagai proyek riset

I wanted to see what I could learn.

Saya ingin melihat apa yang bisa saya pelajari.

And then I learned a lot of things.

Dan saya belajar banyak hal.

I discovered so many secrets.

Saya memecahkan banyak rahasia.

For example, I found if I just don't run,

Misalnya, saya menemukan kalau saya tidak lari

if I got rejected,

saat saya ditolak,

I could actually turn a "no" into a "yes,"

saya sebenarnya bisa mengubah “tidak” menjadi “ya,”

and the magic word is, "why."

dan kata kuncinya adalah “mengapa.”

So one day I went to a stranger's house, I had this flower in my hand,

Saya pernah pergi ke rumah orang asing, dengan bunga di tangan saya,

mengetuk pintunya, dan bertanya,

knocked on the door and said,

“Hai, bisakah saya menanam bunga ini di halaman belakangmu?”

"Hey, can I plant this flower in your backyard?"

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

And he said, "No."

Dia langsung menjawab.“Tidak.”

But before he could leave I said,

Tapi sebelum dia masuk, saya bertanya,

"Hey, can I know why?"

“Bolehkan saya tahu mengapa?”

And he said, "Well, I have this dog

Dan dia berkata, “Saya punya anjing

that would dig up anything I put in the backyard.

yang menggali apapun yang ada di halaman belakang.

I don't want to waste your flower.

Saya tidak ingin menyia-nyiakan tanamanmu.

If you want to do this, go across the street and talk to Connie.

Kalau Anda mau, cobalah pergi ke seberang dan tanya Connie.

She loves flowers."

Dia penyuka bunga.”

So that's what I did.

Dan itulah yang saya lakukan.

I went across and knocked on Connie's door.

Saya pergi ke seberang dan mengetuk pintu rumah Connie.

And she was so happy to see me.

Dan dia menyukai ide saya.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

And then half an hour later,

Lalu setengah jam kemudian,

there was this flower in Connie's backyard.

ada bunga ini di halaman belakang Connie.

I'm sure it looks better now.

Saya yakin sekarang pasti bagus.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

But had I left after the initial rejection,

Bayangkan jika saya pergi setelah penolakan pertama,

saya akan berpikir,

I would've thought,

itu mungkin karena pria itu tidak memercayai saya,

well, it's because the guy didn't trust me,

it's because I was crazy,

karena saya gila,

because I didn't dress up well, I didn't look good.

karena tidak berpakaian bagus, tidak terlihat baik.

Ternyata bukan itu.

It was none of those.

Tapi karena yang saya tawarkan tidak sesuai dengan yang dia inginkan.

It was because what I offered did not fit what he wanted.

And he trusted me enough to offer me a referral,

Dan dia cukup percaya saya untuk menawarkan pengganti,

using a sales term.

memakai istilah bisnis.

I converted a referral.

saya mendapatkan ‘referral.’

Then one day --

Lalu suatu hari --

and I also learned that I can actually say certain things

saya juga belajar kalau saya bisa mengatakan hal tertentu

and maximize my chance to get a yes.

dan memungkinkan saya mendapat jawaban ya.

So for example, one day I went to a Starbucks,

Contohnya, suatu hari saya ke Starbucks, dan bertanya pada manejernya,

and asked the manager, "Hey, can I be a Starbucks greeter?"

“Bisakah saya menjadi penyambut di Starbucks?”

He was like, "What's a Starbucks greeter?"

Dia berkata, “Apa maksudmu penyambut Starbucks?”

I said, "Do you know those Walmart greeters?

Saya jawab, “Seperti penyambut pelanggan di Walmart?

You know, those people who say 'hi' to you before you walk in the store,

Orang yang menyapamu saat kau masuk ke toko,

and make sure you don't steal stuff, basically?

dan memastikanmu tidak mengutil?

I want to give a Walmart experience to Starbucks customers."

Saya ingin pelanggan Starbucks merasakan pengalaman itu.”

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

Well, I'm not sure that's a good thing, actually --

Saya tidak yakin itu ide bagus --

Actually, I'm pretty sure it's a bad thing.

Sejujurnya, saya pikir itu ide yang buruk.

And he was like, "Oh" --

Dan dia berkata, “Oh” --

yeah, this is how he looked, his name is Eric --

ya, itu dia, namanya Eric --

dia menjawab, “Saya tidak yakin.”

and he was like, "I'm not sure."

Begitulah dia merespon saya. “Tidak yakin.”

This is how he was hearing me. "Not sure."

Lalu, saya bertanya, “Apa itu aneh?”

Then I ask him, "Is that weird?"

He's like, "Yeah, it's really weird, man."

Dia menjawab, “Ya, itu sangat aneh, Pak.”

But as soon as he said that, his whole demeanor changed.

tapi begitu dia mengatakannya, sikapnya berubah.

It's as if he's putting all the doubt on the floor.

Seolah dia membuang semua keraguannya..

And he said, "Yeah, you can do this,

Dia lalu berkata, “Ya, lakukan saja,

just don't get too weird."

tapi jangan terlalu aneh.”

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

Jadi selama satu jam, saya menjadi penyambut di Starbucks.

So for the next hour I was the Starbucks greeter.

I said "hi" to every customer that walked in,

Saya menyapa setiap pelanggan yang masuk,

and gave them holiday cheers.

dan memberi mereka ucapan selamat liburan.

Ngomong-ngomong, saya tidak tahu apa jalur karir Anda,

By the way, I don't know what your career trajectory is,

don't be a greeter.

tapi jangan jadi penyambut.

(Tertawa)

(Laughter)

It was really boring.

Itu benar-benar membosankan.

But then I found I could do this because I mentioned, "Is that weird?"

Tapi saya jadi tahu saya bisa melakukannya karena bertanya, “Apa itu aneh?”

I mentioned the doubt that he was having.

Saya melontarkan keraguan yang dia rasakan.

And because I mentioned, "Is that weird?", that means I wasn't weird.

Karena saya menyebutkan “Apa itu aneh?” bukan berarti saya tidak aneh.

That means I was actually thinking just like him,

Artinya saya berpikir sama dengan dia

seeing this as a weird thing.

bahwa ini adalah hal yang aneh.

And again, and again,

Lagi dan lagi,

I learned that if I mention some doubt people might have

Saya belajar kalau saya menyebutkan keraguan seseorang

sebelum saya meminta sesuatu,

before I ask the question,

saya akan mendapatkan kepercayaan mereka.

I gained their trust.

People were more likely to say yes to me.

Dan orang akan cenderung mengiyakan permintaan saya.

And then I learned I could fulfill my life dream ...

Saya juga belajar saya bisa mencapai mimpi saya ...

by asking.

dengan bertanya.

You know, I came from four generations of teachers,

Tahukah Anda, keluarga saya adalah guru selama empat generasi

and my grandma has always told me,

dan nenek saya selalu berkata,

"Hey Jia, you can do anything you want,

“Jia, kau boleh menjadi apapun,

but it'd be great if you became a teacher."

tapi akan lebih baik kalau kau menjadi guru.”

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

Tapi saya ingin jadi pengusaha, jadi saya mengabaikannya.

But I wanted to be an entrepreneur, so I didn't.

But it has always been my dream to actually teach something.

Tapi saya selalu punya mimpi untuk mengajarkan sesuatu.

Jadi saya pikir, “Kenapa saya tidak minta

So I said, "What if I just ask

and teach a college class?"

untuk mengajar di kelas universitas?”

I lived in Austin at the time,

Saat itu saya tinggal di Austin,

jadi saya pergi ke Universitas Texas di Austin

so I went to University of Texas at Austin

dan mendatangi profesor di sana, “Bisakah saya mengajar di kelas Anda?”

and knocked on professors' doors and said, "Can I teach your class?"

I didn't get anywhere the first couple of times.

Saya tidak berhasil mulanya.

But because I didn't run -- I kept doing it --

Tapi karena saya tidak menyerah. -- saya terus bertanya --

and on the third try the professor was very impressed.

Setelah tiga kali mencoba, seorang profesor terkesan.

Dia berkata, ” Tidak ada yang melakukan ini sebelumnya.”

He was like, "No one has done this before."

And I came in prepared with powerpoints and my lesson.

Dan saya datang dengan powerpoint dan materi.

He said, "Wow, I can use this.

Dia berkata, “Wah, saya bisa menggunakan ini.”

Why don't you come back in two months? I'll fit you in my curriculum."

Kembalilah dua bulan lagi. Nanti saya masukkan ke kurikulum saya.

And two months later I was teaching a class.

Dan dua bulan kemudian, Saya mengajar di kelas.

This is me -- you probably can't see, this is a bad picture.

Ini saya -- Anda mungkin tidak bisa lihat, fotonya jelek.

You know, sometimes you get rejected by lighting, you know?

Tahukan, kadang Anda juga ditolak oleh pencahayaan?

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

But wow --

Tapi wah --

when I finished teaching that class, I walked out crying,

Ketika saya selesai mengajar saat itu, saya keluar dengan menangis,

because I thought

karena saya pikir

I could fulfill my life dream just by simply asking.

saya bisa mencapai mimpi saya hanya dengan bertanya.

I used to think I have to accomplish all these things --

Saya dulu berpikir saya harus mencapai banyak hal --

have to be a great entrepreneur, or get a PhD to teach --

harus jadi pengusaha hebat, harus bergelar PhD untuk mengajar

but no, I just asked,

tapi tidak, saya hanya bertanya

and I could teach.

dan sayapun bisa mengajar.

And in that picture, which you can't see,

Di foto yang tidak bisa Anda lihat tadi,

I quoted Martin Luther King, Jr.

saya mengutip Martin Luther King, Jr.

Why? Because in my research I found that people who really change the world,

Karena dari riset, saya jadi tahu bahwa orang yang mengubah dunia,

who change the way we live and the way we think,

yang mengubah cara kita hidup, dan cara kita berpikir,

are the people who were met with initial and often violent rejections.

adalah orang-orang yang mengalami penolakan sejak awal dan seringnya keras.

People like Martin Luther King, Jr.,

Orang seperti Martin Luther King, Jr,

like Mahatma Gandhi, Nelson Mandela,

Mahatma Gandhi, Nelson Mandela

or even Jesus Christ.

bahkan Yesus Kristus.

These people did not let rejection define them.

Orang-orang ini tidak membiarkan penolakan membentuk mereka.

They let their own reaction after rejection define themselves.

Mereka membiarkan reaksi setelah ditolak membentuk diri mereka.

And they embraced rejection.

Dan mereka merangkul penolakan.

And we don't have to be those people to learn about rejection,

Kita tidak harus menjadi mereka untuk belajar soal penolakan,

and in my case,

dalam kasus saya,

rejection was my curse,

penolakan adalah kutukan saya,

was my boogeyman.

monster bagi saya

It has bothered me my whole life because I was running away from it.

yang mengejar saya seumur hidup, karena saya lari darinya.

Then I started embracing it.

Tapi lalu saya merangkulnya.

I turned that into the biggest gift in my life.

Saya mengubahnya menjadi berkah dalam hidup saya.

I started teaching people how to turn rejections into opportunities.

Saya mulai mengajarkan orang-orang bagaimana mengubah penolakan jadi peluang.

I use my blog, I use my talk,

Saya menggunakan blog saya, kuliah saya,

I use the book I just published,

buku yang baru saya terbitkan,

and I'm even building technology to help people overcome their fear of rejection.

saya bahkan mengembangkan teknologi untuk mengatasi rasa takut pada penolakan

When you get rejected in life,

Saat Anda ditolak dalam hidup,

when you are facing the next obstacle

Saat Anda menghadapi tantangan,

or next failure,

atau kegagalan lain,

coba pikirkan kemungkinan yang ada,

consider the possibilities.

Jangan lari.

Don't run.

If you just embrace them,

Jika Anda merangkulnya,

they might become your gifts as well.

mungkin itu juga bisa menjadi berkah bagi Anda.

Thank you.

Terima kasih.

(Applause)

(Tepuk tangan)