Connected, but alone? | Sherry Turkle

2,033,061 views ・ 2012-04-03

TED


请双击下面的英文字幕来播放视频。

翻译人员: Ying Yang 校对人员: Angelia King
00:15
Just a moment ago,
0
15260
2000
几分钟之前
00:17
my daughter Rebecca texted me for good luck.
1
17260
4000
我的女儿 Rebecca 发了一条短信为我加油。
00:21
Her text said,
2
21260
2000
她说
00:23
"Mom, you will rock."
3
23260
3000
“妈妈,你会震撼全场的!”
00:26
I love this.
4
26260
2000
我太喜欢这个了
00:28
Getting that text
5
28260
2000
接到这条短信
00:30
was like getting a hug.
6
30260
2000
就像得到了她的拥抱。
00:32
And so there you have it.
7
32260
3000
所以大家看到了
00:35
I embody
8
35260
2000
我自己
00:37
the central paradox.
9
37260
2000
就处在这样一个核心矛盾里。
00:39
I'm a woman
10
39260
2000
我自己
00:41
who loves getting texts
11
41260
2000
非常喜欢收短信
00:43
who's going to tell you
12
43260
2000
但却要告诉大家
00:45
that too many of them can be a problem.
13
45260
3000
太多的短信会成为一个大问题。
00:48
Actually that reminder of my daughter
14
48260
3000
事实上,我的女儿
00:51
brings me to the beginning of my story.
15
51260
3000
让我想起了这个故事的开端。
00:54
1996, when I gave my first TEDTalk,
16
54260
4000
1996年我第一次在 TED 演讲的时候
00:58
Rebecca was five years old
17
58260
2000
Rebecca 只有5岁
01:00
and she was sitting right there
18
60260
2000
她就坐在那里
01:02
in the front row.
19
62260
2000
最前排。
01:04
I had just written a book
20
64260
2000
那时我刚刚写了一本书
01:06
that celebrated our life on the internet
21
66260
2000
庆祝我们的网络新生活
01:08
and I was about to be on the cover
22
68260
3000
而且将要成为《连线》杂志 (Wired)
01:11
of Wired magazine.
23
71260
2000
的封面人物。
01:13
In those heady days,
24
73260
2000
在那些令人陶醉的日子里
01:15
we were experimenting
25
75260
2000
我们体验着
01:17
with chat rooms and online virtual communities.
26
77260
3000
网络聊天室和在线虚拟社区。
01:20
We were exploring different aspects of ourselves.
27
80260
4000
我们正从不同的角度探索自己。
01:24
And then we unplugged.
28
84260
2000
然后我们回到现实中来。
01:26
I was excited.
29
86260
2000
我对此感到非常兴奋。
01:28
And, as a psychologist, what excited me most
30
88260
3000
作为一个心理学家,最令我兴奋的
01:31
was the idea
31
91260
2000
就是这样的理念:
01:33
that we would use what we learned in the virtual world
32
93260
3000
我们会运用我们在虚拟世界中
01:36
about ourselves, about our identity,
33
96260
3000
对自己,对我们自身认同的了解
01:39
to live better lives in the real world.
34
99260
3000
改善我们的现实生活。
01:42
Now fast-forward to 2012.
35
102260
3000
现在让我们快进到2012年
01:45
I'm back here on the TED stage again.
36
105260
3000
我又重新回到了 TED 的讲台。
01:48
My daughter's 20. She's a college student.
37
108260
3000
我的女儿已经是一名20岁的大学生了。
01:51
She sleeps with her cellphone,
38
111260
4000
她睡觉都抱着她的手机。
01:55
so do I.
39
115260
2000
其实我也是。
01:57
And I've just written a new book,
40
117260
3000
我刚刚完成了一本新书,
02:00
but this time it's not one
41
120260
3000
但是这一本却不会
02:03
that will get me on the cover
42
123260
2000
让我登上《连线》杂志
02:05
of Wired magazine.
43
125260
2000
的封面。
02:07
So what happened?
44
127260
3000
那这十几年间发生了什么呢?
02:10
I'm still excited by technology,
45
130260
3000
我仍然为科技而兴奋
02:13
but I believe,
46
133260
2000
但是我相信
02:15
and I'm here to make the case,
47
135260
2000
并且想要向大家说明
02:17
that we're letting it take us places
48
137260
2000
我们正在放任科技
02:19
that we don't want to go.
49
139260
2000
它将我们带向歧途。
02:21
Over the past 15 years,
50
141260
2000
在过去的15年间
02:23
I've studied technologies of mobile communication
51
143260
3000
我一直在研究移动通信技术的影响
02:26
and I've interviewed hundreds and hundreds of people,
52
146260
3000
并且访问了成百上千的人,
02:29
young and old,
53
149260
2000
年轻的或年长的
02:31
about their plugged in lives.
54
151260
2000
了解他们的“移动生活”。
02:33
And what I've found
55
153260
2000
我发现
02:35
is that our little devices,
56
155260
2000
我们口袋中
02:37
those little devices in our pockets,
57
157260
3000
那些轻巧的电子设备
02:40
are so psychologically powerful
58
160260
2000
在心理学上有着如此强大的力量
02:42
that they don't only change what we do,
59
162260
4000
它们不仅改变了我们的生活方式
02:46
they change who we are.
60
166260
3000
也改变了我们本身。
02:49
Some of the things we do now with our devices
61
169260
2000
我们现在用电子设备做的一些事情
02:51
are things that, only a few years ago,
62
171260
3000
在几年前
02:54
we would have found odd
63
174260
2000
还被认为是稀奇
02:56
or disturbing,
64
176260
2000
或让人讨厌,
02:58
but they've quickly come to seem familiar,
65
178260
3000
但是很快大家就习以为常
03:01
just how we do things.
66
181260
2000
——只是我们的行事方式而已。
03:03
So just to take some quick examples:
67
183260
3000
让我们来举几个简单的例子。
03:06
People text or do email
68
186260
2000
人们在公司的董事会议上
03:08
during corporate board meetings.
69
188260
3000
发短信或写邮件,
03:11
They text and shop and go on Facebook
70
191260
3000
人们发短信,网购,浏览脸谱——
03:14
during classes, during presentations,
71
194260
3000
上课时,听报告时,
03:17
actually during all meetings.
72
197260
2000
实际上在几乎所有的会议时。
03:19
People talk to me about the important new skill
73
199260
3000
甚至有人告诉我一项重要的新技能——
03:22
of making eye contact
74
202260
2000
发短信时如何与别人
03:24
while you're texting.
75
204260
2000
进行眼神交流!
03:26
(Laughter)
76
206260
2000
(笑)
03:28
People explain to me
77
208260
2000
他们说这虽然难
03:30
that it's hard, but that it can be done.
78
210260
3000
但还是可以做到的。
03:33
Parents text and do email
79
213260
2000
父母们在早餐和晚餐时
03:35
at breakfast and at dinner
80
215260
2000
发短信和邮件
03:37
while their children complain
81
217260
3000
孩子们因此抱怨
03:40
about not having their parents' full attention.
82
220260
2000
父母对他们不够关注。
03:42
But then these same children
83
222260
2000
但是同时这些孩子
03:44
deny each other their full attention.
84
224260
3000
也很少专心地与彼此相处。
03:47
This is a recent shot
85
227260
2000
这是一张我女儿和她朋友们
03:49
of my daughter and her friends
86
229260
3000
最近的照片,
03:52
being together
87
232260
2000
她们虽然处在同样的空间
03:54
while not being together.
88
234260
3000
确没有真正地一起相处。
03:57
And we even text at funerals.
89
237260
2000
人们甚至在葬礼上发短信。
03:59
I study this.
90
239260
2000
我研究这一现象:
04:01
We remove ourselves
91
241260
2000
我们需要别的东西
04:03
from our grief or from our revery
92
243260
2000
来分散我们的悲伤或者胡思乱想
04:05
and we go into our phones.
93
245260
3000
所以我们需要玩手机。
04:08
Why does this matter?
94
248260
2000
这样有什么问题吗?
04:10
It matters to me
95
250260
2000
我认为这的确是个问题:
04:12
because I think we're setting ourselves up for trouble --
96
252260
3000
我们正在为自己挖陷阱,
04:15
trouble certainly
97
255260
2000
这个陷阱无疑会影响
04:17
in how we relate to each other,
98
257260
2000
人与人之间的联系,
04:19
but also trouble
99
259260
2000
同时也会影响
04:21
in how we relate to ourselves
100
261260
3000
我们和自己的联系,
04:24
and our capacity for self-reflection.
101
264260
3000
降低我们认识和反省自己的能力。
04:27
We're getting used to a new way
102
267260
2000
我们越来越习惯这种新的
04:29
of being alone together.
103
269260
3000
"一起独处” 的相处方式。
04:32
People want to be with each other,
104
272260
2000
人们希望待在一起,
04:34
but also elsewhere --
105
274260
2000
但是同时也 “在别处”——
04:36
connected to all the different places they want to be.
106
276260
3000
连线到他们想去的不同地方。
04:39
People want to customize their lives.
107
279260
3000
人们想要定制他们的生活,
04:42
They want to go in and out of all the places they are
108
282260
3000
想要在不同的场合和地点之间切换,
04:45
because the thing that matters most to them
109
285260
2000
因为对他们来说最重要的是
04:47
is control over where they put their attention.
110
287260
4000
控制和分配他们的精力。
04:51
So you want to go to that board meeting,
111
291260
3000
例如你想去参加董事会议
04:54
but you only want to pay attention
112
294260
2000
但是只想关注你感兴趣
04:56
to the bits that interest you.
113
296260
2000
的一小部分内容。
04:58
And some people think that's a good thing.
114
298260
3000
有人认为这是好事
05:01
But you can end up
115
301260
2000
但是长此以往,
05:03
hiding from each other,
116
303260
2000
人们就会对别人隐藏自己,
05:05
even as we're all constantly connected to each other.
117
305260
3000
即便我们一直保持着彼此间的联系。
05:08
A 50-year-old business man
118
308260
2000
一位50岁的商人
05:10
lamented to me
119
310260
2000
曾悲哀地告诉我
05:12
that he feels he doesn't have colleagues anymore at work.
120
312260
3000
他觉得工作时不再有同事了。
05:15
When he goes to work, he doesn't stop by to talk to anybody,
121
315260
3000
他工作时不会停下来和别人说活。
05:18
he doesn't call.
122
318260
2000
他不打电话
05:20
And he says he doesn't want to interrupt his colleagues
123
320260
3000
他说他不想打断他的同事,
05:23
because, he says, "They're too busy on their email."
124
323260
3000
因为,他说:“ 他们都在忙着发邮件。”
05:26
But then he stops himself
125
326260
2000
但是然后他停下来,
05:28
and he says, "You know, I'm not telling you the truth.
126
328260
2000
他说:“ 其实我没有说实话,”
05:30
I'm the one who doesn't want to be interrupted.
127
330260
3000
“ 我也不想让别人打扰我。”
05:33
I think I should want to,
128
333260
2000
“ 我觉得我应该想(被打扰)的,”
05:35
but actually I'd rather just do things on my Blackberry."
129
335260
4000
“ 但是实际上我更愿意用我的黑莓手机(联系别人)。”
05:39
Across the generations,
130
339260
2000
不管哪一代人,
05:41
I see that people can't get enough of each other,
131
341260
4000
我发现他们没法从彼此那里得到足够的关注——
05:45
if and only if
132
345260
2000
如果他们仅仅
05:47
they can have each other at a distance,
133
347260
3000
将彼此保持在一种
05:50
in amounts they can control.
134
350260
2000
可以控制的距离范围里。
05:52
I call it the Goldilocks effect:
135
352260
3000
我把这种现象称作 Goldilocks 适宜效应:
05:55
not too close, not too far,
136
355260
3000
不太近,也不太远,
05:58
just right.
137
358260
2000
刚刚好。
06:00
But what might feel just right
138
360260
2000
但是对于刚才那位中年商人来说
06:02
for that middle-aged executive
139
362260
2000
刚刚好的距离
06:04
can be a problem for an adolescent
140
364260
2000
对需要学会与人面对面交流的
06:06
who needs to develop face-to-face relationships.
141
366260
4000
青少年来说,却可能太过疏远。
06:10
An 18-year-old boy
142
370260
2000
有一个18岁的孩子
06:12
who uses texting for almost everything
143
372260
3000
他几乎任何事情都用发短信解决,
06:15
says to me wistfully,
144
375260
2000
他惆怅地跟我说
06:17
"Someday, someday,
145
377260
3000
“总有一天,
06:20
but certainly not now,
146
380260
2000
但是当然不是现在
06:22
I'd like to learn how to have a conversation."
147
382260
4000
我会学习一下如何跟人交谈。”
06:26
When I ask people
148
386260
2000
我问人们
06:28
"What's wrong with having a conversation?"
149
388260
3000
“为什么不面对面交谈?”
06:31
People say, "I'll tell you what's wrong with having a conversation.
150
391260
4000
他们回答说:“ 因为面对面交谈
06:35
It takes place in real time
151
395260
3000
是实时发生的,
06:38
and you can't control what you're going to say."
152
398260
4000
你没法控制你要说什么。”
06:42
So that's the bottom line.
153
402260
2000
所以这才是最重要的:
06:44
Texting, email, posting,
154
404260
3000
发短信, 写邮件,贴照片发状态
06:47
all of these things
155
407260
2000
所有这些
06:49
let us present the self as we want to be.
156
409260
3000
都能让我们向别人呈现出我们想变成的样子。
06:52
We get to edit,
157
412260
2000
我们可以编辑
06:54
and that means we get to delete,
158
414260
3000
就是说我们可以删除,
06:57
and that means we get to retouch,
159
417260
3000
可以修改和润色
07:00
the face, the voice,
160
420260
2000
我们的面容,声音
07:02
the flesh, the body --
161
422260
2000
甚至我们的整个形象
07:04
not too little, not too much,
162
424260
3000
让它不少也不多
07:07
just right.
163
427260
2000
刚刚好。
07:09
Human relationships
164
429260
2000
人类的关系非常丰富
07:11
are rich and they're messy
165
431260
2000
也很复杂,
07:13
and they're demanding.
166
433260
2000
而且需要技巧和精力来处理。
07:15
And we clean them up with technology.
167
435260
3000
我们现在可以用技术使它变简便。
07:18
And when we do,
168
438260
2000
在我们做这种简化时
07:20
one of the things that can happen
169
440260
2000
一个很可能的问题就是
07:22
is that we sacrifice conversation
170
442260
2000
我们为了简便的联系
07:24
for mere connection.
171
444260
2000
放弃了面对面的交流。
07:26
We short-change ourselves.
172
446260
3000
我们这是自欺欺人。
07:29
And over time,
173
449260
2000
长此以往
07:31
we seem to forget this,
174
451260
2000
我们似乎忘记了这一点
07:33
or we seem to stop caring.
175
453260
3000
或者没有人在乎这一点了。
07:36
I was caught off guard
176
456260
4000
Stephen Colbert问过这样一个
07:40
when Stephen Colbert
177
460260
2000
让我猝不及防的
07:42
asked me a profound question,
178
462260
4000
深刻的问题。
07:46
a profound question.
179
466260
3000
非常深刻。
07:49
He said, "Don't all those little tweets,
180
469260
6000
他说:“ 难道那些
07:55
don't all those little sips
181
475260
3000
微小的简短的
07:58
of online communication,
182
478260
3000
在线交流的片段
08:01
add up to one big gulp
183
481260
3000
加在一起不能等同于
08:04
of real conversation?"
184
484260
4000
真正的交谈吗?”
08:08
My answer was no,
185
488260
2000
我的回答是“不能”。
08:10
they don't add up.
186
490260
2000
那些片段不能整合在一起。
08:12
Connecting in sips may work
187
492260
4000
以这种小片段的方式交流
08:16
for gathering discrete bits of information,
188
496260
4000
可能可以收集到那些精心修饰过的信息,
08:20
they may work for saying, "I'm thinking about you,"
189
500260
4000
可能表达 “ 我在想你 ”,
08:24
or even for saying, "I love you," --
190
504260
2000
甚至表达 “我爱你”,
08:26
I mean, look at how I felt
191
506260
2000
的确, 想象一下
08:28
when I got that text from my daughter --
192
508260
3000
接到女儿那条短信时我有多么高兴。
08:31
but they don't really work
193
511260
2000
但是那些小片段
08:33
for learning about each other,
194
513260
2000
很难让我们互相了解,
08:35
for really coming to know and understand each other.
195
515260
4000
真正地了解和理解对方。
08:39
And we use conversations with each other
196
519260
4000
我们在与彼此交谈的同时
08:43
to learn how to have conversations
197
523260
2000
也学习着如何
08:45
with ourselves.
198
525260
2000
同自己交流。
08:47
So a flight from conversation
199
527260
2000
所以放弃面对面交谈
08:49
can really matter
200
529260
2000
确实有着很大的影响,
08:51
because it can compromise
201
531260
2000
因为这会损害
08:53
our capacity for self-reflection.
202
533260
2000
我们自我反省的能力。
08:55
For kids growing up,
203
535260
2000
对于孩子们来说
08:57
that skill is the bedrock of development.
204
537260
4000
这项能力是成长的一个重要的基石。
09:01
Over and over I hear,
205
541260
2000
我一次又一次地听到:
09:03
"I would rather text than talk."
206
543260
3000
“比起说话我更愿意发短信。”
09:06
And what I'm seeing
207
546260
2000
我所看到的也是
09:08
is that people get so used to being short-changed
208
548260
2000
人们如此习惯于自欺欺人,
09:10
out of real conversation,
209
550260
2000
逃离真实的交谈,
09:12
so used to getting by with less,
210
552260
3000
如此习惯于逃向更少更浅的交流,
09:15
that they've become almost willing
211
555260
2000
以至于他们几乎越来越希望
09:17
to dispense with people altogether.
212
557260
2000
躲开别人。
09:19
So for example,
213
559260
2000
比如说,
09:21
many people share with me this wish,
214
561260
2000
很多人跟我讲过这样的愿望,
09:23
that some day a more advanced version of Siri,
215
563260
3000
有一天,更高版本的Siri,
09:26
the digital assistant on Apple's iPhone,
216
566260
3000
(苹果公司iphone的智能语音助手)
09:29
will be more like a best friend,
217
569260
2000
会更像一个好朋友,
09:31
someone who will listen
218
571260
2000
一个当别人都无暇顾及你时
09:33
when others won't.
219
573260
2000
还耐心聆听的挚友。
09:35
I believe this wish
220
575260
2000
我相信这样的愿望
09:37
reflects a painful truth
221
577260
2000
反映了过去15年间
09:39
that I've learned in the past 15 years.
222
579260
3000
我了解到的一个痛苦的事实:
09:42
That feeling that no one is listening to me
223
582260
4000
那种 “没有人愿意听我倾诉” 的感觉
09:46
is very important
224
586260
2000
在我们与科技的关系里
09:48
in our relationships with technology.
225
588260
2000
起了重要的作用。
09:50
That's why it's so appealing
226
590260
2000
这是解释了为什么我们这么喜欢
09:52
to have a Facebook page
227
592260
2000
脸谱页面
09:54
or a Twitter feed --
228
594260
2000
或者推特页面。
09:56
so many automatic listeners.
229
596260
3000
上面有这么多自动生成的听众呀!
09:59
And the feeling that no one is listening to me
230
599260
3000
而且那种没人倾听的感觉
10:02
make us want to spend time
231
602260
2000
使我们更愿意和
10:04
with machines that seem to care about us.
232
604260
3000
看似关心我们的机器待在一起。
10:07
We're developing robots,
233
607260
2000
我们在开发一种
10:09
they call them sociable robots,
234
609260
2000
被称作“社会性机器人” 的产品,
10:11
that are specifically designed to be companions --
235
611260
3000
它们是专门设计来
10:14
to the elderly,
236
614260
2000
陪伴老人,
10:16
to our children,
237
616260
2000
孩子,
10:18
to us.
238
618260
2000
甚至我们每个人的。
10:20
Have we so lost confidence
239
620260
3000
我们已经对给予彼此关怀
10:23
that we will be there for each other?
240
623260
4000
毫无信心了吗?(要转而依赖机器人?)
10:27
During my research
241
627260
2000
我的有一项在
10:29
I worked in nursing homes,
242
629260
2000
疗养院进行的研究,
10:31
and I brought in these sociable robots
243
631260
3000
我们把 “社会性机器人” 带到疗养院里
10:34
that were designed to give the elderly
244
634260
2000
希望它们可以给予老人
10:36
the feeling that they were understood.
245
636260
3000
被理解的温暖感。
10:39
And one day I came in
246
639260
2000
一天,我走进疗养院
10:41
and a woman who had lost a child
247
641260
2000
看到一位失去孩子的妇女
10:43
was talking to a robot
248
643260
2000
正在对着
10:45
in the shape of a baby seal.
249
645260
3000
一个小海豹形状的机器人说话。
10:48
It seemed to be looking in her eyes.
250
648260
2000
这个机器人看上去像在看她的眼睛,
10:50
It seemed to be following the conversation.
251
650260
3000
看上去像听得懂她说话,
10:53
It comforted her.
252
653260
3000
它可以给她安慰,
10:56
And many people found this amazing.
253
656260
4000
很多人都觉得这种技术很棒。
11:00
But that woman was trying to make sense of her life
254
660260
5000
但是那位妇女居然在试图让
11:05
with a machine that had no experience
255
665260
3000
一个对人类的生活轨迹
11:08
of the arc of a human life.
256
668260
3000
毫无感受的机器理解她!
11:11
That robot put on a great show.
257
671260
2000
那个机器人只是完成了一场很棒的表演。
11:13
And we're vulnerable.
258
673260
2000
我们是如此脆弱,
11:15
People experience pretend empathy
259
675260
3000
会把伪装的同情和共鸣
11:18
as though it were the real thing.
260
678260
3000
当作真的。
11:21
So during that moment
261
681260
4000
在那位妇女沉溺于
11:25
when that woman
262
685260
2000
机器人带给她的
11:27
was experiencing that pretend empathy,
263
687260
3000
伪装的同情的时候,
11:30
I was thinking, "That robot can't empathize.
264
690260
3000
我在想:“ 那个机器人不可能真正地同情。”
11:33
It doesn't face death.
265
693260
2000
它不用面对死亡,
11:35
It doesn't know life."
266
695260
2000
它也根本不懂人生。
11:37
And as that woman took comfort
267
697260
2000
看到这位从机器人的陪伴
11:39
in her robot companion,
268
699260
2000
中寻找安慰的妇女,
11:41
I didn't find it amazing;
269
701260
2000
我一点都不觉得这技术先进,
11:43
I found it one of the most wrenching, complicated moments
270
703260
4000
我发现那是我这15年的工作里
11:47
in my 15 years of work.
271
707260
4000
最复杂,最纠结,最不是滋味的时刻。
11:51
But when I stepped back,
272
711260
2000
但是当我退一步来看,
11:53
I felt myself
273
713260
2000
我感到自己就在
11:55
at the cold, hard center
274
715260
3000
这场完美风暴
11:58
of a perfect storm.
275
718260
2000
冰冷无情的中心。
12:00
We expect more from technology
276
720260
3000
我们对于技术的期望越来越多
12:03
and less from each other.
277
723260
3000
对彼此的期望却越来越少。
12:06
And I ask myself,
278
726260
2000
我问自己:
12:08
"Why have things come to this?"
279
728260
3000
“为什么会这样呢?”
12:11
And I believe it's because
280
731260
2000
我相信,原因是技术
12:13
technology appeals to us most
281
733260
3000
最吸引我们的地方
12:16
where we are most vulnerable.
282
736260
2000
正是我们最脆弱的一方面。
12:18
And we are vulnerable.
283
738260
2000
我们都很脆弱——
12:20
We're lonely,
284
740260
2000
我们很孤独
12:22
but we're afraid of intimacy.
285
742260
2000
却又害怕亲密的关系。
12:24
And so from social networks to sociable robots,
286
744260
3000
所以我们研发社交网站和 “社会性机器人”
12:27
we're designing technologies
287
747260
2000
这样的技术
12:29
that will give us the illusion of companionship
288
749260
3000
使我们可以在不需要真正友情的情况下
12:32
without the demands of friendship.
289
752260
2000
体验被关心和陪伴的幻觉。
12:34
We turn to technology to help us feel connected
290
754260
3000
我们借助技术找到和别人保持联系的感觉
12:37
in ways we can comfortably control.
291
757260
3000
并且可以舒服地控制这种联系。
12:40
But we're not so comfortable.
292
760260
2000
但是其实我们并没有这么舒服,
12:42
We are not so much in control.
293
762260
3000
也没能很好地控制。
12:45
These days, those phones in our pockets
294
765260
3000
如今,我们口袋中的手机
12:48
are changing our minds and hearts
295
768260
2000
正在改变我们的想法和我们的心灵,
12:50
because they offer us
296
770260
2000
缘于它们带来了三种
12:52
three gratifying fantasies.
297
772260
2000
让人兴奋的错觉
12:54
One, that we can put our attention
298
774260
2000
一,我们可以把精力分配到
12:56
wherever we want it to be;
299
776260
2000
任何我们想关注的地方;
12:58
two, that we will always be heard;
300
778260
3000
二, 总会有人倾听我们;
13:01
and three, that we will never have to be alone.
301
781260
3000
三,我们永远都不用独自一人。
13:04
And that third idea,
302
784260
2000
这第三种
13:06
that we will never have to be alone,
303
786260
3000
“我们永远不用独处” 的错觉
13:09
is central to changing our psyches.
304
789260
2000
对于改变我们的心理状态是最关键的。
13:11
Because the moment that people are alone,
305
791260
3000
因为当人们独处的时候,
13:14
even for a few seconds,
306
794260
2000
即使只有几秒钟,
13:16
they become anxious, they panic, they fidget,
307
796260
3000
他们也会变得焦虑,恐慌,坐立难安,
13:19
they reach for a device.
308
799260
2000
因而转向那些电子设备。
13:21
Just think of people at a checkout line
309
801260
2000
想想在人们在排队的时候,
13:23
or at a red light.
310
803260
2000
等红灯的时候。
13:25
Being alone feels like a problem that needs to be solved.
311
805260
4000
独处像是变成了一个亟待解决的问题。
13:29
And so people try to solve it by connecting.
312
809260
3000
所以人们试着用联系别人的方法解决它。
13:32
But here, connection
313
812260
2000
但是这种联系
13:34
is more like a symptom than a cure.
314
814260
3000
更像是一种症状而不是真正的治疗。
13:37
It expresses, but it doesn't solve,
315
817260
3000
它表达着我们的焦虑,
13:40
an underlying problem.
316
820260
2000
却没有解决根本的问题。
13:42
But more than a symptom,
317
822260
2000
但是它又不仅仅是一种症状——
13:44
constant connection is changing
318
824260
2000
频繁的联系改变着人们
13:46
the way people think of themselves.
319
826260
2000
对自己的理解。
13:48
It's shaping a new way of being.
320
828260
3000
它催生了一种的新的生活方式。
13:51
The best way to describe it is,
321
831260
2000
对此最好描述是,
13:53
I share therefore I am.
322
833260
3000
“我分享,故我在。”
13:56
We use technology to define ourselves
323
836260
3000
我们用技术来定义自己,
13:59
by sharing our thoughts and feelings
324
839260
2000
——分享我们的想法和感觉,
14:01
even as we're having them.
325
841260
2000
甚至在我们刚刚产生这些想法的时候。
14:03
So before it was:
326
843260
2000
所以以前,情况是
14:05
I have a feeling,
327
845260
2000
我有了一个想法,
14:07
I want to make a call.
328
847260
2000
我想打电话告诉别人。
14:09
Now it's: I want to have a feeling,
329
849260
3000
现在,事情变成了,我想要有个想法,
14:12
I need to send a text.
330
852260
2000
所以我需要发短信告诉别人。
14:14
The problem with this new regime
331
854260
3000
这种 “我分享,故我在”
14:17
of "I share therefore I am"
332
857260
2000
的问题在于
14:19
is that, if we don't have connection,
333
859260
2000
如果我们跟别人断了联系,
14:21
we don't feel like ourselves.
334
861260
2000
我们就感觉不再是自己了。
14:23
We almost don't feel ourselves.
335
863260
2000
我们几乎感觉不到自己的存在了。
14:25
So what do we do? We connect more and more.
336
865260
3000
所以我们怎么办呢? 我们的联系越来越多。
14:28
But in the process,
337
868260
2000
但是与此同时
14:30
we set ourselves up to be isolated.
338
870260
3000
我们也把自己隔绝起来。
14:33
How do you get from connection to isolation?
339
873260
4000
为什么联系会导致隔绝呢?
14:37
You end up isolated
340
877260
2000
原因是
14:39
if you don't cultivate the capacity for solitude,
341
879260
2000
没有培养独处的能力——
14:41
the ability to be separate,
342
881260
3000
一种可以与外界分离,
14:44
to gather yourself.
343
884260
2000
集中自己的思想的能力。
14:46
Solitude is where you find yourself
344
886260
3000
在独处中,你可以找到自己
14:49
so that you can reach out to other people
345
889260
2000
这样你才能很好的转向别人,
14:51
and form real attachments.
346
891260
3000
与他们形成真正的联系。
14:54
When we don't have the capacity for solitude,
347
894260
3000
当我们缺乏独处能力的时候,
14:57
we turn to other people in order to feel less anxious
348
897260
3000
我们联系别人仅仅是为了减少焦虑感
15:00
or in order to feel alive.
349
900260
2000
或者为了感觉到自己还活着。
15:02
When this happens,
350
902260
2000
这时候,
15:04
we're not able to appreciate who they are.
351
904260
3000
我们并不真正地欣赏别人,
15:07
It's as though we're using them
352
907260
2000
而这好像是把他们当作
15:09
as spare parts
353
909260
2000
支撑我们脆弱的自我感的
15:11
to support our fragile sense of self.
354
911260
3000
备用零件。
15:14
We slip into thinking that always being connected
355
914260
3000
我们简单地认为总和别人保持联系
15:17
is going to make us feel less alone.
356
917260
4000
就能让我们不那么孤单。
15:21
But we're at risk,
357
921260
2000
但是这是有风险的,
15:23
because actually it's the opposite that's true.
358
923260
3000
因为事实恰好相反。
15:26
If we're not able to be alone,
359
926260
2000
如果我们不能够独处,
15:28
we're going to be more lonely.
360
928260
2000
我们会更加孤单。
15:30
And if we don't teach our children to be alone,
361
930260
3000
而如果我们不能教会我们的孩子独处,
15:33
they're only going to know
362
933260
2000
他们只能学会
15:35
how to be lonely.
363
935260
2000
如何体验孤独。
15:37
When I spoke at TED in 1996,
364
937260
3000
1996年我在 TED 演讲,
15:40
reporting on my studies
365
940260
2000
报告我关于
15:42
of the early virtual communities,
366
942260
2000
早期虚拟社区的研究时曾说:
15:44
I said, "Those who make the most
367
944260
3000
“那些对于网络世界
15:47
of their lives on the screen
368
947260
2000
最为投入的人
15:49
come to it in a spirit of self-reflection."
369
949260
3000
是带着一种自我反省的精神上网的。”
15:52
And that's what I'm calling for here, now:
370
952260
3000
这也是我现在想要呼吁的
15:55
reflection and, more than that, a conversation
371
955260
3000
我们需要一些反思,更甚者是,展开对话
15:58
about where our current use of technology
372
958260
3000
讨论我们目前对技术的应用
16:01
may be taking us,
373
961260
2000
会将我们带向何方,
16:03
what it might be costing us.
374
963260
2000
会让我们失去什么。
16:05
We're smitten with technology.
375
965260
3000
我们被技术(带来的错觉)迷住了,
16:08
And we're afraid, like young lovers,
376
968260
3000
而且我们就像年轻的恋人一样
16:11
that too much talking might spoil the romance.
377
971260
3000
害怕说太多话会毁掉浪漫的气氛。
16:14
But it's time to talk.
378
974260
2000
但是是时候该交谈了。
16:16
We grew up with digital technology
379
976260
3000
数字技术伴随我们长大,
16:19
and so we see it as all grown up.
380
979260
2000
所以我们也认为技术已经很成熟。
16:21
But it's not, it's early days.
381
981260
3000
实则不然,它还在起步阶段。
16:24
There's plenty of time
382
984260
2000
我们还有很多的时间
16:26
for us to reconsider how we use it,
383
986260
2000
来反思我们应当如何应用它,
16:28
how we build it.
384
988260
2000
如何发展它。
16:30
I'm not suggesting
385
990260
2000
我并不是说
16:32
that we turn away from our devices,
386
992260
2000
我们应该抛弃我们的电子设备,
16:34
just that we develop a more self-aware relationship
387
994260
3000
我只是建议我们应当与电子设备,
16:37
with them, with each other
388
997260
2000
与别人,也与自己,
16:39
and with ourselves.
389
999260
3000
建立更加有自我意识的关系。
16:42
I see some first steps.
390
1002260
2000
我们可以从这些方面开始改变:
16:44
Start thinking of solitude
391
1004260
2000
把独处
16:46
as a good thing.
392
1006260
2000
当做一件好事,
16:48
Make room for it.
393
1008260
2000
为它留出空间。
16:50
Find ways to demonstrate this
394
1010260
3000
向你的孩子们说明
16:53
as a value to your children.
395
1013260
2000
独处的价值。
16:55
Create sacred spaces at home --
396
1015260
2000
在家里开辟出专门的空间,
16:57
the kitchen, the dining room --
397
1017260
2000
例如厨房或者客厅,
16:59
and reclaim them for conversation.
398
1019260
3000
用于和家人交谈。
17:02
Do the same thing at work.
399
1022260
2000
在工作中也可以这样。
17:04
At work, we're so busy communicating
400
1024260
2000
我们在工作时总是忙于(浅层的)联系,
17:06
that we often don't have time to think,
401
1026260
3000
以至于没有时间思考,
17:09
we don't have time to talk,
402
1029260
3000
也没有时间谈论
17:12
about the things that really matter.
403
1032260
2000
那些真正重要的事情。
17:14
Change that.
404
1034260
2000
是时候改变了。
17:16
Most important, we all really need to listen to each other,
405
1036260
4000
最重要的是,我们真的需要聆听彼此,
17:20
including to the boring bits.
406
1040260
4000
包括说的那些无聊的细节。
17:24
Because it's when we stumble
407
1044260
2000
因为正是在我们结巴,迟疑,
17:26
or hesitate or lose our words
408
1046260
3000
找不到合适的词的时候,
17:29
that we reveal ourselves to each other.
409
1049260
4000
我们才向对方展现出真实的自我。
17:33
Technology is making a bid
410
1053260
3000
技术正在试图
17:36
to redefine human connection --
411
1056260
2000
重新定义人们的联系——
17:38
how we care for each other,
412
1058260
2000
例如我们怎样关心别人,
17:40
how we care for ourselves --
413
1060260
2000
和关心自己——
17:42
but it's also giving us the opportunity
414
1062260
2000
但是它也给了我们机会来
17:44
to affirm our values
415
1064260
2000
确认我们的价值观
17:46
and our direction.
416
1066260
2000
和发展方向。
17:48
I'm optimistic.
417
1068260
2000
对此我很乐观。
17:50
We have everything we need to start.
418
1070260
3000
我们拥有做这种改变所需的一切。
17:53
We have each other.
419
1073260
2000
我们身边有彼此,
17:55
And we have the greatest chance of success
420
1075260
3000
而且我们有很大的几率成功,
17:58
if we recognize our vulnerability.
421
1078260
3000
只要我们意识到我们的脆弱性
18:01
That we listen
422
1081260
2000
——我们会轻信
18:03
when technology says
423
1083260
2000
技术能
18:05
it will take something complicated
424
1085260
3000
“将复杂的事情变简单”
18:08
and promises something simpler.
425
1088260
3000
的这种脆弱性。
18:11
So in my work,
426
1091260
2000
在我的工作中,
18:13
I hear that life is hard,
427
1093260
3000
我常常听到 “生活很难”,
18:16
relationships are filled with risk.
428
1096260
2000
“人际关系充满风险” 云云。
18:18
And then there's technology --
429
1098260
2000
然后技术出现了,
18:20
simpler, hopeful,
430
1100260
2000
更简单,充满希望,
18:22
optimistic, ever-young.
431
1102260
3000
乐观而充满朝气。
18:25
It's like calling in the cavalry.
432
1105260
2000
就像天降一位专家,解决所有烦恼。
18:27
An ad campaign promises
433
1107260
2000
一个系列广告这样说:
18:29
that online and with avatars,
434
1109260
2000
在线使用虚拟形象(avartar) 系统,
18:31
you can "Finally, love your friends
435
1111260
4000
你 “最终就可以爱你的朋友,
18:35
love your body, love your life,
436
1115260
3000
爱你自己,爱你的生活,
18:38
online and with avatars."
437
1118260
3000
如此简单。”
18:41
We're drawn to virtual romance,
438
1121260
2000
我们被虚拟的爱情吸引,
18:43
to computer games that seem like worlds,
439
1123260
3000
被电脑游戏营造的奇幻世界吸引,
18:46
to the idea that robots, robots,
440
1126260
4000
也被 “机器人将会变成我们
18:50
will someday be our true companions.
441
1130260
3000
最好的伴侣” 的想法所吸引。
18:53
We spend an evening on the social network
442
1133260
3000
我们晚上泡在社交网站上,
18:56
instead of going to the pub with friends.
443
1136260
3000
而不是和现实中的朋友去酒吧玩。
18:59
But our fantasies of substitution
444
1139260
2000
但是我们对于这些
19:01
have cost us.
445
1141260
3000
网络替代品的幻想已经使我们失去了很多。
19:04
Now we all need to focus
446
1144260
3000
如今,我们需要专注于找到
19:07
on the many, many ways
447
1147260
2000
可以让科技
19:09
technology can lead us back
448
1149260
2000
将我们带回
19:11
to our real lives, our own bodies,
449
1151260
3000
现实生活的方法——
19:14
our own communities,
450
1154260
2000
带回到我们的身体,我们的圈子,
19:16
our own politics,
451
1156260
2000
我们的社会,我们的政治,
19:18
our own planet.
452
1158260
2000
我们自己的星球。
19:20
They need us.
453
1160260
2000
它们需要我们。
19:22
Let's talk about
454
1162260
2000
让我们来关注和讨论
19:24
how we can use digital technology,
455
1164260
3000
如何运用数字技术,
19:27
the technology of our dreams,
456
1167260
3000
那些我们梦想的神奇技术,
19:30
to make this life
457
1170260
2000
来帮助我们回归这样的生活,
19:32
the life we can love.
458
1172260
2000
充满爱的生活。
19:34
Thank you.
459
1174260
2000
谢谢大家。
19:36
(Applause)
460
1176260
6000
(掌声)
关于本网站

这个网站将向你介绍对学习英语有用的YouTube视频。你将看到来自世界各地的一流教师教授的英语课程。双击每个视频页面上显示的英文字幕,即可从那里播放视频。字幕会随着视频的播放而同步滚动。如果你有任何意见或要求,请使用此联系表与我们联系。

https://forms.gle/WvT1wiN1qDtmnspy7