Why we need to talk about depression | Kevin Breel

Prevoditelj: Martina Juranic Recezent: Ivan Stamenković

For a long time in my life,

Dugo vremena u mom životu,

I felt like I'd been living two different lives.

osjećao sam se kao da živim dva različita života.

There's the life that everyone sees,

Jedan život koji svi vide

and then there's the life that only I see.

i drugi koji samo ja vidim.

And in the life that everyone sees,

U životu koji svi vide,

who I am is a friend,

ja sam prijatelj,

a son, a brother,

sin, brat,

a stand-up comedian and a teenager.

stand-up komičar i tinejdžer.

That's the life everyone sees.

To je život koji svi vide.

If you were to ask my friends and family to describe me,

Ako biste pitali prijatelje i obitelj

that's what they would tell you.

da me opišu, to bi vam rekli.

And that's a huge part of me. That is who I am.

To je veliki dio mene. To sam ja.

And if you were to ask me to describe myself,

Ako biste mene pitali da sam sebe opišem,

I'd probably say some of those same things.

vjerojatno bih vam rekao te iste stvari.

And I wouldn't be lying,

I ne bih vam lagao,

but I wouldn't totally be telling you the truth, either,

ali niti bih vam rekao skroz istinu,

because the truth is,

zato što je istina

that's just the life everyone else sees.

da je to samo život koji svi drugi vide.

In the life that only I see, who I am,

U životu koji samo ja vidim, tko sam ja,

who I really am,

tko sam zaista ja,

is someone who struggles intensely with depression.

ja sam osoba koja se intenizivno bori sa depresijom.

I have for the last six years of my life,

Tako je zadnjih šest godina mog života

and I continue to every day.

i tako je svaki dan.

Now, for someone who has never experienced depression

Netko tko nikada nije iskusio depresiju

ili mu nije jasno što to znači,

or doesn't really know what that means,

that might surprise them to hear,

to bih ih moglo iznenaditi

because there's this pretty popular misconception

jer prevladava pogrešno shvaćanje

that depression is just being sad

da je depresija stanje tuge

when something in your life goes wrong,

kada nešto u životu krene po zlu,

when you break up with your girlfriend,

prekineš sa djevojkom,

when you lose a loved one,

izgubiš nekoga koga voliš,

when you don't get the job you wanted.

ne dobiješ posao kojeg želiš.

But that's sadness. That's a natural thing.

Međutim, to je tuga. To je normalno.

That's a natural human emotion.

To je normalna ljudska emocija.

Real depression isn't being sad

Prava depresija nije biti tužan

when something in your life goes wrong.

kada nešto u životu krene po zlu.

Real depression is being sad

Prava depresija je biti tužan

when everything in your life is going right.

kada je sve u tvom životu dobro.

That's real depression, and that's what I suffer from.

To je prava depresija i od toga ja bolujem.

And to be totally honest,

Da budem potpuno iskren,

that's hard for me to stand up here and say.

teško mi je ovdje stajati i to reći.

It's hard for me to talk about,

Teško mi je o tome pričati

and it seems to be hard for everyone to talk about,

i čini se da je svakome teško o tome pričati,

so much so that no one's talking about it.

toliko da nitko o tome ne priča.

And no one's talking about depression, but we need to be,

I nitko ne priča o depresiji, ali trebali bismo

because right now it's a massive problem.

jer je to ogroman problem.

It's a massive problem.

To je ogroman problem.

But we don't see it on social media, right?

Ali to ne vidimo u masovnim medijima, zar ne?

We don't see it on Facebook. We don't see it on Twitter.

To ne vidimo na Facebooku. Niti na Twitteru.

We don't see it on the news, because it's not happy,

Niti na vijestima, zato što nije veselo,

it's not fun, it's not light.

nije zabavno, nije lako.

And so because we don't see it, we don't see the severity of it.

I zato što se ne susrećemo s time, ne vidimo ozbiljnost toga.

But the severity of it and the seriousness of it is this:

Težina i ozbiljnost toga jest da

every 30 seconds,

svakih 30 sekundi,

every 30 seconds, somewhere,

svakih 30 sekundi, negdje,

someone in the world takes their own life

netko u svijetu si oduzme život

because of depression,

zbog depresije,

and it might be two blocks away, it might be two countries away,

možda se događa dvije ulice dalje, dvije države dalje,

it might be two continents away, but it's happening,

dva kontinenta dalje, ali se događa

and it's happening every single day.

i događa se svaki dan.

And we have a tendency, as a society,

Mi kao društvo imamo sklonost

to look at that and go, "So what?"

da to vidimo i kažemo: "Pa što onda?"

So what? We look at that, and we go, "That's your problem.

"Pa što onda?" Vidmo i kažemo: "To je tvoj problem.

That's their problem."

To je njihov problem."

We say we're sad and we say we're sorry,

Kažemo da smo tužni i da nam je žao,

but we also say, "So what?"

ali isto tako kažemo: "Pa što?"

Well, two years ago it was my problem,

Prije dvije godine to je bio moj problem,

because I sat on the edge of my bed

zato što sam sjedio na rubu kreveta

where I'd sat a million times before

gdje sam sjedio milijun puta prije

and I was suicidal.

i bio sam suicidalan.

I was suicidal, and if you were to look at my life on the surface,

Bio sam suicidalan, a kada biste pogledali moj život na površini,

ne biste vidjeli klinca koji je bio suicidalan.

you wouldn't see a kid who was suicidal.

Vidjeli biste klinca koji je bio kapetan košarkaškog tima,

You'd see a kid who was the captain of his basketball team,

the drama and theater student of the year,

najboljeg studenta glume i dramaturgije,

the English student of the year,

najboljeg studenta engleskog,

someone who was consistently on the honor roll

nekog tko je neprekidno primao priznanja

and consistently at every party.

i dosljedno bio na svakoj zabavi.

So you would say I wasn't depressed, you would say

Rekli biste da nisam depresivan,

I wasn't suicidal, but you would be wrong.

rekli biste da nisam suicidalan, ali bili biste u krivu.

You would be wrong. So I sat there that night

I tako sam sjedio te noći

beside a bottle of pills with a pen and paper in my hand

kraj bočice pilula, s olovkom i papirom u ruci

and I thought about taking my own life

i razmišljao da si oduzmem život

and I came this close to doing it.

i došao sam poprilično blizu da to učinim.

Došao sam ovoliko blizu da to učinim.

I came this close to doing it.

And I didn't, so that makes me one of the lucky ones,

Ali nisam i to me čini srećkovićem,

one of the people who gets to step out on the ledge

jednim od onih koji dođu do litice

and look down but not jump,

i pogledaju dolje, ali se ne bace,

one of the lucky ones who survives.

jednim od sretnika koji su preživjeli.

Well, I survived, and that just leaves me with my story,

Preživio sam i tu je nastala moja priča,

and my story is this:

a moja priča je:

In four simple words, I suffer from depression.

u četiri jednostavne riječi, ja patim od depresije.

I suffer from depression,

Patim od depresije,

and for a long time, I think,

i mislim da sam dugo vremena

I was living two totally different lives,

živio dva potpuno različita života,

where one person was always afraid of the other.

gdje se jedna osoba uvijek bojala druge.

I was afraid that people would see me for who I really was,

Bojao sam se da će ljudi vidjeti tko sam zaista,

that I wasn't the perfect, popular kid in high school everyone thought I was,

da nisam savršen, popularan srednjoškolac za kojeg su me svi smatrali,

that beneath my smile, there was struggle,

ispod mog osmijeha krila se borba,

and beneath my light, there was dark,

ispod mog svijetla, tama,

and beneath my big personality just hid even bigger pain.

a ispod moje velike osobnosti se krila još veća patnja.

See, some people might fear girls not liking them back.

Neki dečki se boje da se neće svidjeti djevojkama.

Some people might fear sharks. Some people might fear death.

Neki ljudi se boje morskih pasa. Neki se boje smrti.

But for me, for a large part of my life, I feared myself.

Ali ja, veći dio svog života, bojao sam se samog sebe.

I feared my truth, I feared my honesty, I feared my vulnerability,

Bojao sam se svoje istine, poštenja, ranjivosti

and that fear made me feel

i zbog tog straha sam se osjećao

like I was forced into a corner,

kao da sam stjeran u kut,

like I was forced into a corner and there was only one way out,

kao da sam stjeran u kut iz kojeg postoji samo jedan izlaz van

and so I thought about that way every single day.

i tako sam razmišljao svaki dan.

I thought about it every single day,

Razmišljao sam o tome svaki dan

and if I'm being totally honest, standing here

i da budem u potpunosti iskren,

I've thought about it again since, because that's the sickness,

stojeći ovdje razmišljao sam ponovno o tome jer je to bolest,

that's the struggle, that's depression,

to je borba, to je depresija

and depression isn't chicken pox.

i ona nije kao vodene kozice.

You don't beat it once and it's gone forever.

Ne prebrodite ju jednom i onda nestane zauvijek.

It's something you live with. It's something you live in.

To je nešto s čime živite. To je nešto u čemu živite.

It's the roommate you can't kick out. It's the voice you can't ignore.

To je cimer kojeg ne možete izbaciti van. To je glas kojeg ne možete ignorirati.

It's the feelings you can't seem to escape,

To su osjećaji kojima ne možete pobjeći,

the scariest part is that after a while,

a najstrašniji dio je da nakon određenog vremena,

you become numb to it. It becomes normal for you,

postanete nijemi na to. Postane normalno

and what you really fear the most

i ono čega se najviše bojite,

isn't the suffering inside of you.

nije patnja koju osjećate iznutra,

It's the stigma inside of others,

nego stigma u očima drugih,

it's the shame, it's the embarrassment,

sram, osramoćenost,

it's the disapproving look on a friend's face,

neodobravanje na licima prijatelja,

it's the whispers in the hallway that you're weak,

došaptavanje na hodnicima da ste slabić,

it's the comments that you're crazy.

komentari da ste luđak.

That's what keeps you from getting help.

To vas prijeći da potražite pomoć.

That's what makes you hold it in and hide it.

Zato to držite za sebe i skrivate.

It's the stigma. So you hold it in and you hide it,

To je stigma. I tako to držite u sebi i skrivate,

and you hold it in and you hide it,

držite i skrivate,

and even though it's keeping you in bed every day

i iako ste prikovani uz krevet svaki dan,

and it's making your life feel empty no matter how much you try and fill it,

a vaš život se čini praznim bez obzira koliko se trudite da ga popunite,

you hide it, because the stigma in our society

svejedno to skrivate jer je stigma u društvu

around depression is very real.

u vezi depresije prevelika.

It's very real, and if you think that it isn't, ask yourself this:

Stvarna je i ako mislite da nije, pitajte se:

Would you rather make your next Facebook status

Biste li radije napisali na Facebooku

say you're having a tough time getting out of bed

da vam se teško dignuti iz kreveta

because you hurt your back

jer ste ozlijedili leđa

or you're having a tough time getting out of bed every morning

ili da vam se teško dignuti iz kreveta svako jutro

because you're depressed?

jer ste depresivni?

That's the stigma, because unfortunately,

To je ta stigma jer, nažalost,

we live in a world where if you break your arm,

živimo u svijetu u kojem ako slomite ruku,

everyone runs over to sign your cast,

svatko trči da vam se potpiše na gips,

but if you tell people you're depressed, everyone runs the other way.

ali ako kažete ljudima da ste depresivni, svi bježe od vas.

That's the stigma.

To je stigma.

We are so, so, so accepting of any body part breaking down

Mi tako, tako, tako lako prihvaćamo propadanje bilo kojeg dijela tijela

other than our brains. And that's ignorance.

osim našeg mozga. I to je neznanje.

That's pure ignorance, and that ignorance has created

To je čisto neznanje i to neznanje stvara

a world that doesn't understand depression,

svijet koji ne razumije depresiju,

that doesn't understand mental health.

koji ne razumije mentalno zdravlje.

And that's ironic to me, because depression

I to je ironično zato što je depresija

is one of the best documented problems we have in the world,

jedna od najbolje dokumentiranih problema u svijetu,

yet it's one of the least discussed.

ali se ipak o tome najmanje priča.

We just push it aside and put it in a corner

Mi to samo stavimo sa strane, u kut

and pretend it's not there and hope it'll fix itself.

i pretvaramo se da nije tu i da će se riješiti samo od sebe.

Well, it won't. It hasn't, and it's not going to,

Neće. Nije i neće,

because that's wishful thinking,

to su samo puste želje,

and wishful thinking isn't a game plan, it's procrastination,

a puste želje ne mijenjaju stvari, nego su odugovlačenje,

and we can't procrastinate on something this important.

a ne smijemo odugovlačiti s nečim tako ozbiljnim.

The first step in solving any problem

Prvi korak u rješavanju bilo kojeg problema

is recognizing there is one.

je priznati da postoji.

Well, we haven't done that, so we can't really expect

Mi to još nismo učinili, tako da ne možemo očekivati

to find an answer when we're still afraid of the question.

da ćemo naći odgovor na pitanja koja se još uvijek bojimo postaviti.

And I don't know what the solution is.

Ne znam koje je riješenje.

I wish I did, but I don't -- but I think,

Volio bih da znam, ali ne znam -- ali mislim,

I think it has to start here.

mislim da mora početi ovdje.

It has to start with me, it has to start with you,

Mora početi sa mnom, s vama,

it has to start with the people who are suffering,

s ljudima koje pate,

the ones who are hidden in the shadows.

s onima koji se skrivaju u sjeni.

We need to speak up and shatter the silence.

Trebamo progovoriti i razbiti tišinu.

We need to be the ones who are brave for what we believe in,

Trebamo biti hrabri u onome u što vjerujemo,

because if there's one thing that I've come to realize,

zato što jedna stvar koju sam shvatio,

if there's one thing that I see as the biggest problem,

jedna stvar koju vidim kao najveći problem

it's not in building a world

nije sagraditi svijet

where we eliminate the ignorance of others.

eliminirajući neznanje drugih.

It's in building a world where we teach the acceptance of ourselves,

Nego sagraditi svijet u kojem učimo kako prihvatiti sebe,

where we're okay with who we are,

u kojem smo ok s onim što jesmo,

because when we get honest,

zato što kada smo iskreni,

we see that we all struggle and we all suffer.

shvatimo da svi mi se borimo i mučimo.

Whether it's with this, whether it's with something else,

Bez obzira dali je to zbog toga, ili zbog nečeg drugog,

we all know what it is to hurt.

svi znamo što je povrijeđenost.

We all know what it is to have pain in our heart,

Svi znamo kako je osjećati bol u srcu,

and we all know how important it is to heal.

i koliko je važno da rane zacijele.

But right now, depression is society's deep cut

Ali trenutačno sada, depresija je duboka rana društva

that we're content to put a Band-Aid over and pretend it's not there.

na koju spremno stavljamo flaster i pretvarmo se da nije tu.

Well, it is there. It is there, and you know what? It's okay.

Ovdje je. Ovdje je i znato što? U redu je.

Depression is okay. If you're going through it, know that you're okay.

Depresija je u redu. Ako prolazite kroz nju, znajte da ste u redu.

And know that you're sick, you're not weak,

Znajte da ste bolesni, niste slabić,

and it's an issue, not an identity,

i da je to problem, a ne vaš identitet,

because when you get past the fear and the ridicule

jer kada nadiđete strah i ismijavanje,

and the judgment and the stigma of others,

osuđivanje i stigmu od strane drugih,

you can see depression for what it really is,

možete vidjeti depresiju kao ono što zaista jest,

and that's just a part of life,

kao dio života,

just a part of life, and as much as I hate,

samo dio života, i koliko god mrzim,

as much as I hate some of the places,

koliko god mrzim neka mjesta

some of the parts of my life depression has dragged me down to,

u koja me uvukla depresija,

in a lot of ways I'm grateful for it.

u mnogočemu sam joj zahvalan.

Because yeah, it's put me in the valleys,

Zato što me je stavila u nizine,

but only to show me there's peaks,

kako bi mi pokazala da postoje vrhunci,

and yeah it's dragged me through the dark

i da, uvukla me u tamu

but only to remind me there is light.

kako bi me podsjetila da postoji svijetlo.

My pain, more than anything in 19 years on this planet,

Moja patnja, više nego išta u 19 godina na ovom planetu,

has given me perspective, and my hurt,

dala mi je drugčiju perspektivu,

my hurt has forced me to have hope,

a moja bol me natjerala da imam nadu,

have hope and to have faith, faith in myself,

da imam nadu i vjeru, vjeru u sebe,

faith in others, faith that it can get better,

vjeru u druge, vjeru da će biti bolje,

that we can change this, that we can speak up

da možemo ovo promjeniti, da možemo progovoriti

and speak out and fight back against ignorance,

i pričati o tome i boriti se protiv neznanja,

fight back against intolerance,

boriti se protiv netolerancije,

and more than anything,

i više nego išta,

learn to love ourselves,

naučiti kako voljeti sebe,

learn to accept ourselves for who we are,

naučiti prihvaćati sebe kakvima jesmo,

the people we are, not the people the world wants us to be.

ljudi kakvi jesmo, a ne onakvi kakve svijet želi da budemo.

Because the world I believe in is one

Svijet u koji ja vjerujem je onaj

where embracing your light doesn't mean ignoring your dark.

u kojem prihvaćanjem svog svijetla ne znači ignorirati svoju tamu.

The world I believe in is one where we're measured

Svijet u koji ja vjerujem je onaj u kojem se cijeni

by our ability to overcome adversities, not avoid them.

sposobnost da predvladamo suprotnosti, a ne da ih izbjegavamo.

The world I believe in is one where I can look someone in the eye

Svijet u koji ja vjerujem je onaj u kojem mogu pogledati nekoga u oči

and say, "I'm going through hell,"

i reći: "Prolazim kroz pakao",

and they can look back at me and go, "Me too," and that's okay,

a oni me mogu pogledati i reći: "I ja isto" i to je u redu,

and it's okay because depression is okay. We're people.

u redu je zato što je depresija u redu. Ljudi smo.

We're people, and we struggle and we suffer

Ljudi smo, borimo se, patimo,

and we bleed and we cry, and if you think that true strength

krvarimo, plačemo, i ako mislite da prava snaga

means never showing any weakness, then I'm here

znači nikada ne pokazati slabost, onda sam ja tu

to tell you you're wrong.

da vam kažem da ste u krivu.

You're wrong, because it's the opposite.

U krivu ste jer je baš suprotno.

We're people, and we have problems.

Mi smo ljudi i imamo probleme.

We're not perfect, and that's okay.

Nismo savršeni i to je ok.

So we need to stop the ignorance,

Trebamo zaustaviti neznanje.

stop the intolerance, stop the stigma,

zaustaviti netoleranciju, zaustaviti stigmu,

and stop the silence, and we need to take away the taboos,

spriječiti tišinu i riješiti se tabua,

take a look at the truth, and start talking,

pogledati istinu i početi pričati,

because the only way we're going to beat a problem

zato što jedini način kako ćemo riješiti problem

that people are battling alone

s kojim se ljudi sami bore

is by standing strong together,

jest da budemo snažni zajedno,

by standing strong together.

snažni zajedno.

And I believe that we can.

I ja vjerujem da mi to možemo.

I believe that we can. Thank you guys so much.

Vjerujem da mi to možemo. Hvala vam svima.

This is a dream come true. Thank you. (Applause)

Ovo je ostvaranje mojih snova. Hvala. (Pljesak)

Thank you. (Applause)

Hvala. (Pljesak)