My Inner Life with Asperger's | Alix Generous | TED Talks

Translator: Abe Felisa Reviewer: Lanny Yunita

Today, I want to talk to you about dreams.

Hari ini, saya ingin berbicara tentang mimpi.

I have been a lucid dreamer my whole life,

Sejak kecil, saya mampu mengendalikan mimpi,

and it's cooler than in the movies.

hal itu lebih keren daripada film.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

Beyond flying, breathing fire,

Terbang bebas, menghembuskan api,

and making hot men spontaneously appear ...

dan membuat pria seksi tiba-tiba muncul...

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

I can do things like read and write music.

Saya jadi bisa membaca dan mencipta musik.

Fun fact is that I wrote my personal statement to college

Kenyataannya, saya menulis esai masuk universitas

in a dream.

dalam mimpi.

Dan saya diterima. Begitulah.

And I did accepted. So, yeah.

I am a very visual thinker.

Saya adalah pemikir visual.

I think in pictures, not words.

Saya berpikir dalam gambar, bukan kata-kata.

To me, words are more like instincts and language.

Bagi saya, kata-kata seperti naluri dan bahasa.

There are many people like me;

Ada banyak orang seperti saya;

Nikola Tesla, for example,

Nikola Tesla, misalnya,

who could visualize, design, test, and troubleshoot everything --

yang dapat membayangkan, merancang, menguji, dan memecahkan semua masalah --

all of his inventions -- in his mind, accurately.

semua penemuannya -- dilakukan dalam pikirannya dengan akurat.

Language is kind of exclusive to our species, anyway.

Namun, bahasa agak eksklusif bagi spesies kami.

I am a bit more primitive,

Saya agak primitif,

like a beta version of Google Translate.

seperti versi beta Google Translate.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

My brain has the ability to hyper-focus on things that interest me.

Otak saya dapat fokus pada hal yang menarik bagi saya.

For example, once I had an affair with calculus

Contohnya, dulu saya ada hubungan rahasia dengan kalkulus,

that lasted longer than some celebrity marriages.

itu bertahan lebih lama daripada beberapa pernikahan selebriti.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

There are some other unusual things about me.

Ada beberapa hal aneh tentang saya.

You may have noticed that I don't have much inflection

Anda mungkin menyadari, saya tak memakai banyak perubahan kata,

in my voice.

saat saya berbicara.

That's why people often confuse me with a GPS.

Itu sebabnya orang sulit membedakan antara saya dan GPS.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

This can make basic communication a challenge, unless you need directions.

Ini menyulitkan komunikasi sederhana, tapi tidak jika Anda butuh petunjuk arah.

(Tertawa)

(Laughter)

Thank you.

Terima kasih.

(Applause)

(Tepuk tangan)

A few years ago, when I started doing presentations,

Beberapa tahun lalu, ketika saya mulai presentasi,

I went to get head shots done for the first time.

saya membuat pas foto untuk yang pertama kalinya.

The photographer told me to look flirty.

Fotografernya meminta saya untuk berpose genit.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

And I had no idea what she was talking about.

Dan saya tak menangkap maksudnya.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

She said, "Do that thing, you know, with your eyes,

Katanya, "Mainkan matamu,

when you're flirting with guys."

seperti saat kau menggoda pria."

"What thing?" I asked.

"Mainkan apa?" tanya saya.

"You know, squint."

"Kedipkan mata."

And so I tried, really.

Lalu saya coba saja.

It looked something like this.

Jadinya seperti ini.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

I looked like I was searching for Waldo.

Saya terlihat seperti sedang mencari tokoh kartun Waldo.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

There's a reason for this,

Ini ada alasannya,

as there is a reason that Waldo is hiding.

seperti halnya mengapa Waldo bersembunyi.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

I have Asperger's,

Saya menderita Asperger,

a high-functioning form of autism

semacam autisme dengan banyak fungsi

that impairs the basic social skills one is expected to display.

yang menghalangi kecakapan sosial dasar seseorang.

It's made life difficult in many ways,

Dalam berbagai hal, hidup menjadi sulit,

and growing up, I struggled to fit in socially.

dan saat tumbuh besar, saya sulit diterima secara sosial.

My friends would tell jokes, but I didn't understand them.

Teman-teman menjadikan saya bahan gurauan yang membuat saya bingung.

My personal heroes were George Carlin and Stephen Colbert --

Pahlawan pribadi saya adalah George Carlin dan Stephen Colbert,

dan mereka mengajari saya humor.

and they taught me humor.

My personality switched from being shy and awkward

Kepribadian saya berubah dari malu-malu dan canggung,

to being defiant and cursing out a storm.

menjadi berani dan menantang.

Needless to say, I did not have many friends.

Akhirnya, saya tak punya banyak teman.

I was also hypersensitive to texture.

Saya juga terlalu sensitif terhadap tekstur.

The feel of water on my skin was like pins and needles,

Air yang mengenai kulit saya terasa seperti peniti dan jarum,

and so for years, I refused to shower.

jadi bertahun-tahun, saya tak mau mandi.

I can assure you that my hygiene routine is up to standards now, though.

Tapi saat ini standar kebersihan saya sudah bagus.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

I had to do a lot to get here, and my parents --

Banyak yang harus saya lalui sampai bisa seperti sekarang dan orang tua saya --

things kind of got out of control when I was sexually assaulted by a peer,

semua jadi kacau ketika saya diserang secara seksual oleh teman sebaya,

and on top of everything, it made a difficult situation worse.

dan itu membuat situasi sulit bertambah parah.

And I had to travel 2,000 miles across the country to get treatment,

Dan saya harus ke negara lain yang jauh untuk mendapat perawatan,

but within days of them prescribing a new medication,

tapi saat para dokter sedang memikirkan pengobatan baru,

my life turned into an episode of the Walking Dead.

hidup saya menjadi mengerikan.

I became paranoid, and began to hallucinate

Saya ketakutan dan mulai berhalusinasi,

that rotting corpses were coming towards me.

bahwa mayat busuk datang mendekati saya.

My family finally rescued me,

Keluarga saya akhirnya menyelamatkan saya,

but by that time, I had lost 19 pounds in those three weeks,

tapi selama tiga minggu itu, berat saya turun 8,6 kg,

as well as developing severe anemia,

saya juga menderita anemia akut,

and was on the verge of suicide.

dan di ambang bunuh diri.

I transferred to a new treatment center that understood my aversions,

Saya dipindahkan ke klinik perawatan baru yang mengerti masalah saya,

my trauma, and my social anxiety,

trauma saya, dan kecemasan sosial saya,

and they knew how to treat it, and I got the help I finally needed.

mereka bisa menganganinya, dan saya mendapat bantuan yang dibutuhkan.

And after 18 months of hard work,

Dan setelah 18 bulan susah payah,

I went on to do incredible things.

saya mulai melakukan hal-hal yang luar biasa.

One of the things with Asperger's is that oftentimes,

Salah satu masalah penderita Asperger,

yaitu sering punya dunia sendiri yang amat kompleks,

these people have a very complex inner life,

and I know for myself, I have a very colorful personality,

dan saya sendiri tahu kepribadian saya amat beragam,

rich ideas, and just a lot going on in my mind.

kaya akan ide, dan banyak yang saya pikirkan.

But there's a gap between where that stands,

Tapi ada jurang antara keadaan itu

and how I communicate it with the rest of the world.

dengan cara saya menyampaikannya ke orang lain.

And this can make basic communication a challenge.

Dan ini membuat komunikasi sederhana menjadi suatu tantangan besar.

Sedikit yang mau mempekerjakan saya karena kecakapan sosial yang tak memadai,

Not many places would hire me, due to my lack of social skills,

which is why I applied to Waffle House.

karena itu saya melamar ke Waffle House.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

Waffle House is an exceptional 24-hour diner --

Waffle House adalah kedai 24 jam yang agak berbeda --

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

(Applause)

(Tepuk tangan)

Terima kasih --

thank you --

where you can order your hash browns

Di sana bisa memesan kentang panggang,

the many ways that someone would dispose of a human corpse ...

sesering orang membuang mayat...

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

Sliced, diced, peppered, chunked, topped, capped, and covered.

Diiris, dipotong, dibumbui, dicincang, ditaburi, ditutup, dan dibungkus.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

As social norms would have it,

Seperti yang ada dalam norma sosial,

you should only go to Waffle House at an ungodly hour in the night.

Waffle House hanya tersedia pada jam tak lazim di malam hari.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

So one time, at 2 am, I was chatting with a waitress, and I asked her,

Suatu saat jam 2 pagi, saya mengobrol dan bertanya pada pelayan,

"Hal paling konyol apa yang pernah Anda alami di pekerjaan ini?"

"What's the most ridiculous thing that's happened to you on the job?"

And she told me that one time, a man walked in completely naked.

Dan dia bercerita pernah ada seorang pria datang telanjang bulat.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

I said, "Great! Sign me up for the graveyard shift!"

Saya bilang, "Bagus! Daftarkan saya di jadwal shift yang sepi!"

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

Needless to say, Waffle House did not hire me.

Akhirnya, Waffle House tak menerima saya.

So in terms of having Asperger's, it can be viewed as a disadvantage,

Jadi menderita Asperger bisa dianggap sebagai kerugian,

and sometimes it is a real pain in the butt,

dan terkadang ini benar-benar menyiksa,

but it's also the opposite.

tapi terkadang juga sebaliknya.

It's a gift, and it allows me to think innovatively.

Ini adalah anugerah, yang membuat saya berpikir inovatif.

At 19, I won a research competition for my research on coral reefs,

Di usia 19 tahun, saya menang kompetisi penelitian terumbu karang,

and I ended up speaking

dan saya memberikan ceramah

at the UN Convention of Biological Diversity,

di Konvensi Keberagaman Biologis PBB,

presenting this research.

mempresentasikan penelitian saya.

(Applause)

(Tepuk tangan)

Thank you.

Terima kasih.

(Applause)

(Tepuk tangan)

And at 22, I'm getting ready to graduate college,

Di usia 22, saya hampir lulus kuliah,

and I am a co-founder of a biotech company called AutismSees.

dan saya menjadi salah satu pendiri perusahaan biotek bernama AutismSees.

(Applause)

(Tepuk tangan)

Thank you.

Terima kasih.

(Applause)

(Tepuk tangan)

But consider what I had to do to get here:

Tapi bayangkan perjuangan saya untuk bisa jadi seperti saat ini:

25 therapists, 11 misdiagnoses, and years of pain and trauma.

25 terapis, 11 kesalahan diagnosa, dan tahunan rasa sakit dan trauma.

I spent a lot of time thinking if there's a better way,

Saya berpikir terus, apakah ada cara yang lebih baik,

and I think there is: autism-assistive technology.

dan menurut saya ada, yaitu teknologi bantu-autisme.

This technology could play an integral role

Teknologi ini bisa berperan secara terpadu

in helping people with autistic spectrum disorder,

dalam membantu penderita kelainan spektrum autisme,

or ASD.

atau ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder).

The app Podium, released by my company, AutismSees,

Aplikasi Podium yang dirilis oleh perusahaan saya, AutismSees,

has the ability to independently assess and help develop communication skills.

secara mandiri mampu menilai dan membantu mengembangkan kecakapan berkomunikasi.

In addition to this, it tracks eye contact through camera

Aplikasi ini juga menelusuri kontak mata melalui kamera,

and simulates a public-speaking and job-interview experience.

dan mensimulasikan pengalaman berbicara di depan umum dan wawancara kerja.

And so maybe one day, Waffle House will hire me,

Dan mungkin suatu hari, Waffle House akan merekrut saya,

after practicing on it some more.

setelah beberapa kali latihan lagi.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

And one of the great things is that I've used Podium

Dan hebatnya, saya telah menggunakan aplikasi Podium

to help me prepare for today, and it's been a great help.

untuk mempersiapkan hari ini, dan itu sangat membantu.

But it's more than that.

Tapi bukan hanya itu.

There's more that can be done.

Lebih banyak lagi yang bisa dicapai.

For people with ASD --

Bagi penderita ASD --

it has been speculated that many innovative scientists,

diperkirakan banyak ilmuwan inovatif,

researchers, artists, and engineers have it;

peneliti, seniman, dan insinyur yang memilikinya;

like, for example, Emily Dickinson, Jane Austen, Isaac Newton, and Bill Gates

seperti misalnya, Emily Dickinson, Jane Austen, Isaac Newton, dan Bill Gates

are some examples.

adalah beberapa contoh.

But the problem that's encountered

Tapi masalahnya,

is that these brilliant ideas often can't be shared

ide cemerlang ini seringnya tak dapat dibagikan,

if there are communication roadblocks.

jika ada halangan komunikasi.

And so, many people with autism are being overlooked every day,

Dengan begitu, penderita autisme terus diabaikan,

and they're being taken advantage of.

dan mereka dimanfaatkan.

So my dream for people with autism is to change that,

Jadi mimpi saya bagi penderita autisme adalah untuk mengubahnya,

to remove the roadblocks that prevent them from succeeding.

untuk menyingkirkan hambatan yang menghalangi kesuksesan mereka.

One of the reasons I love lucid dreaming

Satu alasan kenapa saya suka mengendalikan mimpi,

is because it allows me to be free,

karena hal itu membuat saya bebas,

without judgment of social and physical consequences.

tanpa penghakiman konsekuensi sosial dan fisik.

When I'm flying over scenes that I create in my mind,

Saat melompati setiap adegan yang saya ciptakan dalam pikiran,

I am at peace.

saya merasa damai.

I am free from judgment,

Saya bebas dari penghakiman,

and so I can do whatever I want, you know?

jadi saya bebas menentukan keinginan saya sendiri.

I'm making out with Brad Pitt, and Angelina is totally cool with it.

Saya bercinta dengan Brad Pitt dan Angelina santai saja.

(Laughter)

(Tertawa)

But the goal of autism-assistive technology is bigger than that,

Tapi tujuan teknologi bantu-autisme lebih besar dari itu,

and more important.

dan lebih penting.

My goal is to shift people's perspective

Tujuan saya adalah mengubah cara pandang orang

of autism and people with higher-functioning Asperger's

terhadap autisme dan penderita Asperger banyak fungsi,

because there is a lot they can do.

karena banyak yang dapat mereka lakukan.

I mean, look at Temple Grandin, for example.

Contohnya, lihatlah Profesor Temple Grandin.

Dengan begitu, terbuka peluang bagi mereka untuk membagikan bakatnya,

And by doing so, we allow people to share their talents with this world

and move this world forward.

dan membuat dunia ini maju.

In addition, we give them the courage to pursue their dreams

Sebagai tambahan, kami memberikan dorongan untuk mengejar mimpi mereka

in the real world, in real time.

di dunia nyata, di waktu nyata.

Thank you.

Terima kasih.

(Applause)

(Tepuk tangan)

Thank you.

Terima kasih.

(Applause)