The brain in love | Helen Fisher

Translator: Aari Lemmik Reviewer: Kaisa-Kitri Niit

Uurisime koos Art Aroni, Lucy Browni ja teiste teadlastega

37 meeletult armunud inimest MRI ajuskänneris.

I and my colleagues Art Aron and Lucy Brown and others,

17 neist olid õnnelikult armunud, 15 olid just maha jäetud

have put 37 people who are madly in love into a functional MRI brain scanner.

ja oleme just alustamas oma kolmandat eksperimenti,

17 who were happily in love, 15 who had just been dumped,

uurimaks neid, kes on peale 10-25 aastat abielu ikka veel armunud.

and we're just starting our third experiment:

Selline meie uurimistöö lühidalt ongi.

studying people who report that they're still in love

after 10 to 25 years of marriage.

Guatemala džunglis Tikalis on üks tempel.

So, this is the short story of that research.

Selle ehitas võimsaim päikesekuningas kõige võimsamas linnriigis,

In the jungles of Guatemala, in Tikal, stands a temple.

Ameerika kõige uhkema tsivilisatsiooni, maiade, valitseja.

It was built by the grandest Sun King, of the grandest city-state,

Tema nimi oli Jasaw Chan K’awiil.

of the grandest civilization of the Americas, the Mayas.

Ta oli peaaegu 2 meetri pikkune.

Ta elas üle 80 aasta vanaks

His name was Jasaw Chan K'awiil.

ja ta maeti templisse aastal 720.

He stood over six feet tall.

Maiade ürikute järgi armastas ta oma naist nii väga,

He lived into his 80s,

and he was buried beneath this monument in 720 AD.

et ehitas tema auks templi oma templi vastu.

And Mayan inscriptions proclaim that he was deeply in love with his wife.

Igal kevadel ja sügisel, täpselt pööripäeval

So, he built a temple in her honor, facing his.

tõuseb päike valitseja templi tagant

And every spring and autumn, exactly at the equinox,

ja katab naise templi oma varjuga.

the sun rises behind his temple,

Ja kui päike loojub naise templi taha,

and perfectly bathes her temple with his shadow.

katab see oma varjuga valitseja templi.

And as the sun sets behind her temple in the afternoon,

Ka 1300 aastat hiljem embavad ja suudlevad need armastajad üksteist.

it perfectly bathes his temple with her shadow.

After 1,300 years, these two lovers still touch and kiss from their tomb.

Inimesed armastavad üksteist üle kogu maailma.

Armastusest lauldakse, armastusest tantsitakse,

armastusest kirjutatakse luuletusi ja lugusid.

Around the world, people love.

Armastusest räägitakse legende ja müüte,

They sing for love, they dance for love,

armastuse nimel piineldakse, elatakse, tapetakse ja surrakse.

they compose poems and stories about love.

They tell myths and legends about love.

Walt Whitman on öelnud: “Oh, annaksin sinu eest kõik.”

They pine for love, they live for love, they kill for love, and they die for love.

Antropoloogidel on tõendeid romantilise armastuse olemasolust 170 ühiskonnas.

As Walt Whitman once said, "O I would stake all for you."

Pole leitud ühiskonda, kus armastust poleks tuntud.

Anthropologists have found evidence of romantic love in 170 societies.

Armastus ei ole aga alati õnnelik kogemus.

They've never found a society that did not have it.

Ühes keskkooliõpilaste uuringus küsiti armastuse kohta igasuguseid asju,

But love isn't always a happy experience.

aga kaks küsimust, mis mulle eriti silma jäid, olid:

In one study of college students, they asked a lot of questions about love,

“Kas sind on maha jätnud keegi, keda sa tõeliselt armastasid?”

but the two that stood out to me the most were:

Ja teine küsimus:

“Kas oled ise jätnud maha kedagi, kes sind väga armastas?”

"Have you ever been rejected by somebody who you really loved?"

Ja pea 95% meestest kui naistest vastas mõlemale küsimusele jaatavalt.

And the second question was:

"Have you ever dumped somebody who really loved you?"

Peaaegu kellelgi ei õnnestu armastusest eluga pääseda.

And almost 95 percent of both men and women said yes to both.

Aga enne, kui räägin, mis ajus toimub,

Almost nobody gets out of love alive.

tahaksin lugeda ühe luuletuse,

mis on minu arust maailma kõige võimsam armastusluuletus.

So, before I start telling you about the brain,

Loomulikult on ka teisi häid luuletusi,

I want to read for you

aga vaevalt, et leidub kaunimat.

what I think is the most powerful love poem on Earth.

Selle luges tundmatu Kwaikutl indiaanlane Lõuna-Alaskalt

There's other love poems that are, of course, just as good,

but I don't think this one can be surpassed.

ühele misjonärile 1896. aastal.

It was told by an anonymous Kwakiutl Indian of southern Alaska

See kõlab nii.

Ma ei ole seda varem kunagi lugenud.

to a missionary in 1896.

"Tuli läbistab mu ihu, armuvalust sinu vastu,

And here it is.

I've never had the opportunity to say it before.

Mu keha on armuvalus, põledes armastusest sinu vastu.

"Fire runs through my body with the pain of loving you.

Minu ihus pulbitseb leegitsev valu armastusest sinu vastu,

Pain runs through my body with the fires of my love for you.

armastuse tuli neelab mind,

Pain like a boil about to burst with my love for you,

ja ma meenutan su sõnu.

Mõtlen sinu armastuse peale

consumed by fire with my love for you.

ja su armastus rebib mu tükkideks.

I remember what you said to me.

Valu ja piin,

kuhu sa küll mu armastuse viid?

I am thinking of your love for me.

I am torn by your love for me.

Kuulsin, et sa lahkud siit,

kuulsin, et jätad mu siia.

Pain and more pain --

Mu keha on kurbusest tundetu,

where are you going with my love?

I am told you will go from here.

pea meeles, mu arm, mu sõnu.

I am told you will leave me here.

Hüvasti, mu arm, hüvasti.”

My body is numb with grief.

Emily Dickinson kirjutas: “Lahkuminek kirjeldab põrgut kõige paremini.”

Remember what I said, my love.

Goodbye, my love, goodbye."

Emily Dickinson once wrote, "Parting is all we need to know of hell."

Kui palju inimesi on kannatanud

inimese evolutsiooni miljonite aastate jooksul?

Kui palju inimesi üle kogu maailma,

How many people have suffered

tantsib just sel hetkel õnnest?

in all the millions of years of human evolution?

Romantiline armastus on üks võimsamaid tundeid maailmas.

How many people around the world

are dancing with elation at this very minute?

Nii otsustasingi aastaid tagasi hakata uurima aju,

Romantic love is one of the most powerful sensations on Earth.

et lähemalt tundma õppida seda hullumeelset seisundit.

So, several years ago, I decided to look into the brain

Meie esimene uurimus õnnelikult armunutest

leidis väga laialdast kajastust,

and study this madness.

nii et sellest ma palju ei räägi.

Our first study of people who were happily in love

Tuvastasime tillukese aktiivse keskuse ajutüve lähedal,

has been widely publicized,

so I'm only going to say very little about it.

mida nimetatakse ventraalseks tegmentaalseks piirkonnaks.

We found activity in a tiny, little factory near the base of the brain

Leidsime seal aktiivseid rakke, mida nimetatakse A10 rakkudeks,

mis toodavad dopamiini, looduslikku stimulaatorit

called the ventral tegmental area.

We found activity in some cells called the A10 cells,

ja kannavad seda aju teistesse osadesse.

Nii ongi, et see osa ajust, VTA, kuulub aju tasusüsteemi.

cells that actually make dopamine, a natural stimulant,

and spray it to many brain regions.

See on märksa lihtsam protsess, kui kognitiivne mõtlemine.

Indeed, this part, the VTA, is part of the brain's reward system.

See on veel madalamal emotsioonidest,

paiknedes osas, mida nimetatakse reptiilseks ajukooreks,

It's way below your cognitive thinking process.

mida seostatakse tahtmise, motivatsiooni, keskendumise ja isudega.

It's below your emotions.

It's part of what we call the reptilian core of the brain,

Selgus, et sama ajuosa, kus märkasime aktiivsust,

associated with wanting, with motivation, with focus and with craving.

aktiviseerus ka siis, kui oldi kokaiini mõju all.

In fact, the same brain region where we found activity

Aga romantiline armastus on palju enamat kui kokaiinilaks.

becomes active also when you feel the rush of cocaine.

Kokaiiniuim läheb vähemalt üle.

But romantic love is much more than a cocaine high --

Romantiline armastus on nagu sundmõte, mis inimest haarab.

at least you come down from cocaine.

Inimese mina justkui kaob,

ei suuda mõelda muust, kui vaid sellest teisest inimesest.

Romantic love is an obsession, it possesses you.

Keegi oleks justkui su pähe elama asunud.

You lose your sense of self.

8. sajandi Jaapani luuletaja on öelnud: “Mu igatsusel ei tulegi lõppu.”

You can't stop thinking about another human being.

Somebody is camping in your head.

Armastus on sõge.

As an eighth-century Japanese poet said, "My longing had no time when it ceases."

Ja see hullus võib võimenduda, kui inimene maha jäetakse.

Wild is love.

Just praegu tegeleme neuroteadlase Lucy Browniga ühe uurimisprojektiga,

And the obsession can get worse when you've been rejected.

uurime nende inimeste näitajaid,

So, right now, Lucy Brown and I, the neuroscientists on our project,

kelle ajutegevust mõõdeti siis, kui neid oli just maha jäetud.

Pean ütlema, et oli keeruline neid inimesi tomograafi lükata,

are looking at the data of the people

who were put into the machine after they had just been dumped.

sest nad olid nii loppis.

It was very difficult actually, putting these people in the machine,

(Naer)

Leidsime ajus kolm aktiivset piirkonda.

because they were in such bad shape.

(Laughter)

Aktiivne oli täpselt sama ajupiirkond,

So anyway, we found activity in three brain regions.

mis aktiveerub, kui ollakse meeltult armunud.

We found activity in the brain region,

Jama lugu küll,

in exactly the same brain region associated with intense romantic love.

sest kui keegi on teid maha jätnud,

siis tahaks ta lihtsalt unustada

ja eluga edasi minna, aga ei saa, sest armastus muutub üha tugevamaks.

What a bad deal.

You know, when you've been dumped,

the one thing you love to do is just forget about this human being,

Nagu Rooma luuletaja Terentsius kirjutas:

and then go on with your life -- but no, you just love them harder.

“Mida vähem lootust, seda suurem armastus.”

As the poet Terence, the Roman poet once said,

Tõepoolest, nüüd teame siis miks.

2000 aastat hiljem oskame seda seletada ajuprotsessidega.

he said, "The less my hope, the hotter my love."

Ajupiirkond, mis kontrollib tahet,

And indeed, we now know why.

Two thousand years later, we can explain this in the brain.

motivatsiooni, himude ja keskendumist

aktiveerub, kui ei saa, mida tahetakse,

That brain system -- the reward system

for wanting, for motivation, for craving, for focus --

antud juhul siis elu peaauhinda: paariliseks sobivat partnerit.

becomes more active when you can't get what you want.

Tuvastasime aktiivsust ka teistes ajupiirkondades,

In this case, life's greatest prize: an appropriate mating partner.

näiteks selles aju osas, mis võrdleb võimalikku kasu ja kahju.

We found activity in other brain regions also --

Lamad selle aparaadi all, vaatad pilti

in a brain region associated with calculating gains and losses.

ja murrad pead, mis siis valesti läks.

You're lying there, you're looking at the picture,

Millest ma ilma jäin?

and you're in this machine,

Meil Lucyga on selle kohta oma väike nali.

and you're calculating what went wrong.

See tuleb David Mameti näidendist,

What have I lost?

As a matter of fact, Lucy and I have a little joke about this.

kus tegelasteks oli kaks suli

ja nais-suli üritab meest lohku tõmmata

It comes from a David Mamet play,

mees vaatab naist ning ütleb,

and there's two con artists in the play,

“Sa oled üks nurjatu poni, sinu peale ma küll ei panustaks”

and the woman is conning the man,

and the man looks at the woman and says,

Ja nii ongi, aktiveerub konkreetne ajupiirkond,

"Oh, you're a bad pony, I'm not going to bet on you."

aju mõnukeskus ehk nucleus accumbens

kui mõeldakse võimaliku kasu või kahju peale.

And indeed, it's this part of the brain,

Sama ajupiirkond aktiveerub ka siis,

the core of the nucleus accumbens,

kui ollakse valmis võtma meeletuid riske, minema välja megavõidule või -kaotusele.

that is becoming active as you're measuring your gains and losses.

It's also the brain region that becomes active

Samuti ilmnes, et aktiveerub ajupiirkond,

when you're willing to take enormous risks for huge gains and huge losses.

mis seostub sügava kiindumusega teise inimese vastu.

Last but not least, we found activity in a brain region

Nii ongi kõikjal armuvalus inimesi ja palju armuvalust ajendatud kuritöid.

associated with deep attachment to another individual.

No wonder people suffer around the world, and we have so many crimes of passion.

Kui armastatu kedagi maha jätab,

siis ei taba inimest mitte ainult meeletu armuvalu

vaid ka tugev kiindumus selle inimese vastu.

When you've been rejected in love,

not only are you engulfed with feelings of romantic love,

Lisaks aktiveerub tasule orienteeritud ajuprotsess

ja inimene tunneb tohutut energiat, otsustavust ja tugevat motivatsiooni,

but you're feeling deep attachment to this individual.

Moreover, this brain circuit for reward is working,

valmisolekut kõik mängu panna, et võita elu suurim auhind.

and you're feeling intense energy, intense focus, intense motivation

and the willingness to risk it all, to win life's greatest prize.

Mida ma sellest eksperimendist õppisin,

mida tahaksin laiemalt jagada?

Eeskätt olen ma aru saanud,

So, what have I learned from this experiment

et romantiline armastus on tung, paarilise leidmise baasvajadus.

that I would like to tell the world?

Mitte seksuaaltung,

Foremost, I have come to think

seksuaaltung ajendab leidma palju erinevaid partnereid.

that romantic love is a drive, a basic mating drive.

Romantiline armastus võimaldab keskenduda paarilise leidmisele,

Not the sex drive --

suunata oma energia ainult ühele inimesele korraga

the sex drive gets you looking for a whole range of partners.

Romantic love enables you to focus your mating energy

ja alustada selle inimesega paarisuhet.

on just one at a time, conserve your mating energy,

Kõige paremini kõikidest luuletajatest, kelle armastusluulet olen lugenud,

and start the mating process with this single individual.

väljendavad seda kõige paremini Platoni read,

I think of all the poetry that I've read about romantic love,

mis on kirjutatud üle 2000 aasta eest.

“Armastuse jumal elab pidevas täitmatuses.

what sums it up best is something that is said by Plato

over 2,000 years ago.

See on täitmatu vajadus, tung, homeostaatiline tasakaalutus,

He said, "The god of love lives in a state of need.

nagu nälg ja janu, mida pole võimalik vaigistada.”

It is a need, it is an urge, it is a homeostatic imbalance.

Olen jõudnud arusaamale, et romantiline armastus on sõltuvus,

Like hunger and thirst, it's almost impossible to stamp out."

täiesti imeline sõltuvus, kui asjad on hästi,

ja põrgulik sõltuvus, kui hästi ei lähe.

I've also come to believe that romantic love is an addiction:

Ja sel on tõepoolest kõik sõltuvuse tunnused.

a perfectly wonderful addiction when it's going well,

Ollakse huvitatud vaid temast, mõeldakse ainudlt talle,

and a perfectly horrible addiction when it's going poorly.

And indeed, it has all of the characteristics of addiction.

igatsetakse meeletult, nähakse reaalsust moonutatult,

ollakse valmis kõik mängu panema, et seda inimest endale võita.

You focus on the person, you obsessively think about them,

On olemas sõltuvuse kolm peamist tunnust:

you crave them, you distort reality,

täitmatus - temast ei saa kunagi küll tahaks veel ja veel ja veel,

your willingness to take enormous risks to win this person.

võõrutusnähud,

And it's got the three main characteristics of addiction:

ja viimaks tagasilangus.

Mul on sõbranna, kes püüab üle saada dramaatilisest suhtest.

tolerance, you need to see them more, and more, and more;

Sellest on nüüd kaheksa kuud ja tal on juba natuke parem.

withdrawals;

and last: relapse.

aga ükspäev autoga sõites

I've got a girlfriend who's just getting over a terrible love affair.

kuulis ta äkki autoraadiost laulu,

It's been about eight months, she's beginning to feel better.

mis meenutas talle seda meest.

And she was driving along in her car the other day,

Ja mitte ainult ei hakanud ta uuesti seda meest igatsema

and suddenly she heard a song on the car radio

vaid pidi lausa auto tee äärde seisma jätma, et nutta.

that reminded her of this man.

Not only did the instant craving come back,

Nii et ma sooviksin väga, et meedikud,

but she had to pull over from the side of the road and cry.

seadusandjad ja samuti haridustöötajad saaksid aru,

So, one thing I would like the medical community,

et romantiline armastus on tõepoolest

and the legal community, and even the college community,

üks kõige rohkem sõltuvust tekitavaid asju siin ilmas.

to see if they can understand, that indeed, romantic love

Tahaksin samuti kõigile öelda, et loomad armastavad.

is one of the most addictive substances on Earth.

Mitte keegi elusolenditest ei hakka

I would also like to tell the world that animals love.

paarituma esimese ettejuhtuvaga.

Liiga vana, liiga noor, liiga räpakas, liiga rumal - lihtsalt ei sobi.

There's not an animal on this planet

that will copulate with anything that comes along.

Vast ainult siis, kui oled laboris puuri kinni pandud

Too old, too young, too scruffy, too stupid, and they won't do it.

ja pead seal veetma terve oma elu,

Unless you're stuck in a laboratory cage --

võib-olla siis ei pirtsutata eriti, kellega seksida,

and you know, if you spend your entire life in a little box,

aga ma olen vaadelnud sadu liike

ja looduses on loomadel alati oma lemmikud.

you're not going to be as picky about who you have sex with,

Tegelikult ei ole see etoloogidele tundmatu nähtus.

but I've looked in a hundred species,

Loomade eelistuskäitumise kirjeldamiseks on vähemalt kaheksa erinevat sõna:

and everywhere in the wild, animals have favorites.

As a matter of fact, ethologists know this.

valikuline indlemine, partnerivalik, emase valik, seksuaalne valik.

There are over eight words for what they call "animal favoritism:"

Praeguseks on sel teemal ilmunud juba kolm teadusartiklit,

selective proceptivity, mate choice, female choice, sexual choice.

kus uuritakse ligitõmbavust,

mis võib kesta vaid ühe sekundi,

And indeed, there are now three academic articles

kuid on väga tugev tõmme,

in which they've looked at this attraction,

mille puhul aktiveerub kas sama ajupiirkond, mis tekitab rahuldust

which may only last for a second,

või siis need ajuhormoonid, mis seostuvad rahulduse otsimise piirkonnaga.

but it's a definite attraction,

and either this same brain region, this reward system,

Tegelikult võib loomadevaheline tõmme tekkida hetkega,

or the chemicals of that reward system are involved.

näiteks läheb elevant koheselt teise elevandi juurde.

Ma usun, et see ongi aluseks nähtusele,

In fact, I think animal attraction can be instant --

mida me nimetame armastuseks esimesest silmapilgust.

you can see an elephant instantly go for another elephant.

And I think that this is really the origin

Minult on sageli küsitud,

of what you and I call "love at first sight."

et kas liiga põhjalik armastuse tundmine pole selle võlu minu jaoks ära võtnud.

People have often asked me

Vastan, et vaevalt küll.

whether what I know about love has spoiled it for me.

Isegi kui tead täpselt, millest on šokolaadikook tehtud,

siis seda kooki süües

And I just simply say, "Hardly."

You can know every single ingredient in a piece of chocolate cake,

naudid ikka koogi maitset.

Kindlasti teen ma samu vigu, mida kõik teisedki teevad,

and then when you sit down and eat that cake,

aga see kõik on süvendanud minu arusaama

you can still feel that joy.

And certainly, I make all the same mistakes that everybody else does too,

ja kirglikku huvi inimeksistentsi vastu.

but it's really deepened my understanding

New Yorgis tuleb mul tihti ette,

and compassion, really, for all human life.

et vaatan beebivankreid ja mul on nendest pisikestest kahju.

As a matter of fact, in New York, I often catch myself

Ja teinekord on mul natuke kahju

looking in baby carriages and feeling a little sorry for the tot.

ka kanast, kes on mu taldrikul,

kui ma mõtlen, kui rikas võib olla inimaju.

And in fact, sometimes I feel a little sorry

for the chicken on my dinner plate,

Meie kõige uuema eksperimendi

when I think of how intense this brain system is.

lükkas käima kolleeg Art Aron.

Our newest experiment has been hatched

Ta uuris ajuskänneriga inimesi, kes väitsid,

et nad on peale pikka kooselu endiselt armunud.

by my colleague, Art Aron --

putting people who are reporting that they are still in love,

Seni oleme ajuskänni teinud viiele inimesele

ja tulemused on tõepoolest täpselt samasugused.

in a long-term relationship, into the functional MRI.

Nad ei valetanudki.

We've put five people in so far,

Ajupiirkonnad, mis seostuvad tugeva romantilise armastusega

and indeed, we found exactly the same thing.

They're not lying.

aktiveerusid ka 25 aastat hiljem,

The brain areas associated with intense romantic love

Endiselt on mitmeid küsimusi romantilise armastuse kohta,

still become active, 25 years later.

mis ootavad vastust või küsimist.

Teema, millega ma just praegu tegelen,

There are still many questions to be answered

mainin seda ainult põgusalt, kohe lõpetan,

and asked about romantic love.

on see, miks armutakse ühte inimesse, aga teise mitte?

The question that I'm working on right this minute --

Ma ei oleks ise kunagi sellist asja mõelnud,

and I'm only going to say it for a second, and then end --

aga match.com, internetikohtingute sait,

is, why do you fall in love with one person, rather than another?

pöördus kolm aastat tagasi selle küsimusega minu poole.

I never would have even thought to think of this,

Tunnistasin, et ma ei tea.

Tean, mis ajus toimub, kui inimene armub,

but Match.com, the Internet dating site,

came to me three years ago and asked me that question.

aga seda, miks armutakse ühte inimesse, aga teise mitte, ma küll ei tea.

And I said, I don't know.

I know what happens in the brain, when you do become in love,

Ja nii olengi ma viimased kolm aastat sellega tegelenud.

but I don't know why you fall in love with one person rather than another.

Sellel on palju erinevaid põhjuseid, miks ühte armutakse, aga teise mitte,

And so, I've spent the last three years on this.

psühholoogid teavad seda hästi.

Kiputakse armuma nendesse, kellel on sama sotsiaalmajanduslik taust,

And there are many reasons that you fall in love with one person

rather than another, that psychologists can tell you.

sama haridustase, kes on ilusad ja kel on samad usulised väärtused.

And we tend to fall in love with somebody from the same socioeconomic background,

Kindlasti on oluline ka lapsepõlv, kuid keegi ei tea, kuidas täpselt.

the same general level of intelligence, of good looks, the same religious values.

Ja see on ka kõik, mida teatakse.

Ja nad ei olegi leidnud viisi,

Your childhood certainly plays a role, but nobody knows how.

kuidas panna kokku kaks õiget inimest, et sünniks toimiv suhe.

And that's about it, that's all they know.

No, they've never found

Ja nii tekkis mul mõte, et äkki on sellel bioloogilised põhjused,

the way two personalities fit together to make a good relationship.

miks ühtede suhtes tekib tõmme ja teiste suhtes mitte.

So, it began to occur to me

Panin kokku küsimustiku, et saada teada, mil määral

that maybe your biology pulls you towards some people rather than another.

tekib organismis dopamiini, serotoniini, östrogeeni ja testosterooni.

And I have concocted a questionnaire to see to what degree

Põhimõtteliselt võib inimesed panna nelja suurde rühma

you express dopamine, serotonin, estrogen and testosterone.

selle järgi, millises vahekorras need neli virgatsainet ajus esinevad.

I think we've evolved four very broad personality types

Minu loodud tutvumisportaalis nimega chemistry.com,

associated with the ratios of these four chemicals in the brain.

lasen ma inimestel esmalt vastata mitmetele küsimustele,

And on this dating site that I have created, called Chemistry.com,

et saada aru, mil määral neil esineb vastavaid ajukemikaale

I ask you first a series of questions

ja siis jälgin, kes kelle endale välja valib.

to see to what degree you express these chemicals,

Ameerikas on selle küsimustiku täitnud ära 3.7 miljonit inimest.

and I'm watching who chooses who to love.

Peaaegu 600 000 inimest on teinud seda 33 teises riigis.

And 3.7 million people have taken the questionnaire in America.

Ma analüüsin praegu neid andmeid

About 600,000 people have taken it in 33 other countries.

ja ühel hetkel - kuigi armastuse maagia on ja jääb,

aga usun, et jõuame lähemale vastusele,

I'm putting the data together now,

and at some point -- there will always be magic to love,

miks on nii, et kui sisened tuppa, kus kõik on enam-vähem sinusarnased,

but I think I will come closer to understanding

sama targad ja näevad sama head välja,

why it is you can walk into a room and everybody is from your background,

aga ikka ei tunne sa kellegi suhtes mingit tõmmet.

your same general level of intelligence, good looks,

Usun, et siin on mängus bioloogia.

Järgnevatel aastatel ehk õnnestub saada selgust,

and you don't feel pulled towards all of them.

mis seal ajus täpselt toimub,

I think there's biology to that.

et ühtede suhtes tekib tõmme ja teiste suhtes mitte.

I think we're going to end up, in the next few years,

Sellega ma nüüd lõpetan.

to understand all kinds of brain mechanisms

Need on mu vanemad inimesed.

that pull us to one person rather than another.

Faulkner on öelnud: “Minevik pole surnud, see pole isegi veel möödas.”

So, I will close with this.

These are my older people.

On tõesti nii, et inimaju on ürgajast saanud kaasa tohutu pagasi.

Faulkner said, "The past is not dead, it's not even past."

On üks asi, mis kannustab mind püüdma mõista inimloomust,

Indeed, we carry a lot of luggage from our yesteryear in the human brain.

And so, there's one thing that makes me pursue my understanding of human nature,

ja praegu tuli see meelde.

Siin on kaks naist.

Naised näevad lähedust sageli teisiti kui mehed.

and this reminds me of it.

Naiste jaoks tähendab lähedus vahetut suhtlemist.

These are two women.

Pöördutakse üksteise suunas,

Women tend to get intimacy differently than men do.

nii-öelda ankurdatakse pilgud üksteisele ja räägitakse.

Women get intimacy from face-to-face talking.

Naiste jaoks on lähedus selline.

We swivel towards each other,

See tuleb ilmselt sellest, et miljoneid aastaid

we do what we call the "anchoring gaze" and we talk.

on hoitud imikut oma näo ees,

hellitades, manitsedes ja sõnadega õpetades.

This is intimacy to women.

I think it comes from millions of years

Meeste jaoks on lähedus pigem külg külje kõrval tegutsemine.

of holding that baby in front of your face,

cajoling it, reprimanding it, educating it with words.

Nii kui üks mees vaatab otsa, pöörab teine pilgu ära.

Men tend to get intimacy from side-by-side doing.

(Naer)

See tuleb ilmselt miljonite aastate pikkusest põõsas istumisest,

As soon as one guy looks up, the other guy will look away.

(Laughter)

vaadates otse enda ette ja üritades kiviga pühvlit täpselt pähe tabada.

I think it comes from millions of years sitting behind the bush,

Mehed on miljoneid aastaid olnud vastakuti oma vaenlastega,

looking straight ahead, trying to hit that buffalo on the head with a rock.

kuid istunud külg-külje kõrval sõpradega.

Minu lõppjäreldus on, et armastus on meie sees.

I think, for millions of years, men faced their enemies,

they sat side-by-side with friends.

See on sügaval meie ajus.

So my final statement is: love is in us.

Meil tuleb leida viis, kuidas üksteist mõista.

Aitäh!

It's deeply embedded in the brain.

(Aplaus)

Our challenge is to understand each other.

Thank you.

(Applause)