Why Some of Us Don’t Have One True Calling | Emilie Wapnick | TED

1,693,129 views ・ 2015-10-26

TED


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00:12
Raise your hand if you've ever been asked the question
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"What do you want to be when you grow up?"
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Now if you had to guess,
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how old would you say you were when you were first asked this question?
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You can just hold up fingers.
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Three. Five. Three. Five. Five. OK.
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Now, raise your hand if the question
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"What do you want to be when you grow up?"
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has ever caused you any anxiety.
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(Laughter)
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Any anxiety at all.
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I'm someone who's never been able to answer the question
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"What do you want to be when you grow up?"
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See, the problem wasn't that I didn't have any interests --
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it's that I had too many.
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In high school, I liked English and math and art and I built websites
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and I played guitar in a punk band called Frustrated Telephone Operator.
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Maybe you've heard of us.
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(Laughter)
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This continued after high school,
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and at a certain point, I began to notice this pattern in myself
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where I would become interested in an area
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and I would dive in, become all-consumed,
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and I'd get to be pretty good at whatever it was,
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and then I would hit this point where I'd start to get bored.
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And usually I would try and persist anyway,
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because I had already devoted so much time and energy
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and sometimes money into this field.
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But eventually this sense of boredom,
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this feeling of, like, yeah, I got this, this isn't challenging anymore --
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it would get to be too much.
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And I would have to let it go.
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But then I would become interested in something else,
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something totally unrelated, and I would dive into that,
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and become all-consumed, and I'd be like, "Yes! I found my thing,"
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and then I would hit this point again where I'd start to get bored.
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And eventually, I would let it go.
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But then I would discover something new and totally different,
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and I would dive into that.
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This pattern caused me a lot of anxiety,
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for two reasons.
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The first was that I wasn't sure
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how I was going to turn any of this into a career.
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I thought that I would eventually have to pick one thing,
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deny all of my other passions,
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and just resign myself to being bored.
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The other reason it caused me so much anxiety
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was a little bit more personal.
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I worried that there was something wrong with this,
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and something wrong with me for being unable to stick with anything.
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I worried that I was afraid of commitment,
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or that I was scattered, or that I was self-sabotaging,
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afraid of my own success.
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If you can relate to my story and to these feelings,
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I'd like you to ask yourself a question
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that I wish I had asked myself back then.
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Ask yourself where you learned to assign the meaning of wrong or abnormal
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to doing many things.
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I'll tell you where you learned it:
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you learned it from the culture.
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We are first asked the question "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
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when we're about five years old.
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And the truth is that no one really cares what you say when you're that age.
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(Laughter)
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It's considered an innocuous question,
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posed to little kids to elicit cute replies,
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like, "I want to be an astronaut," or "I want to be a ballerina,"
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or "I want to be a pirate."
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Insert Halloween costume here.
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(Laughter)
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But this question gets asked of us again and again as we get older
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in various forms -- for instance, high school students might get asked
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what major they're going to pick in college.
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And at some point,
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"What do you want to be when you grow up?"
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goes from being the cute exercise it once was
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to the thing that keeps us up at night.
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Why?
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See, while this question inspires kids to dream about what they could be,
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it does not inspire them to dream about all that they could be.
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In fact, it does just the opposite,
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because when someone asks you what you want to be,
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you can't reply with 20 different things,
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though well-meaning adults will likely chuckle and be like,
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"Oh, how cute, but you can't be a violin maker and a psychologist.
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You have to choose."
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This is Dr. Bob Childs --
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(Laughter)
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and he's a luthier and psychotherapist.
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And this is Amy Ng, a magazine editor turned illustrator, entrepreneur,
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teacher and creative director.
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But most kids don't hear about people like this.
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All they hear
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is that they're going to have to choose.
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But it's more than that.
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The notion of the narrowly focused life
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is highly romanticized in our culture.
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It's this idea of destiny or the one true calling,
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the idea that we each have one great thing
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we are meant to do during our time on this earth,
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and you need to figure out what that thing is
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and devote your life to it.
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But what if you're someone who isn't wired this way?
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What if there are a lot of different subjects that you're curious about,
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and many different things you want to do?
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Well, there is no room for someone like you in this framework.
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And so you might feel alone.
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You might feel like you don't have a purpose.
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And you might feel like there's something wrong with you.
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There's nothing wrong with you.
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What you are is a multipotentialite.
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(Laughter)
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(Applause)
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A multipotentialite is someone with many interests and creative pursuits.
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It's a mouthful to say.
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It might help if you break it up into three parts:
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multi, potential, and ite.
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You can also use one of the other terms that connote the same idea,
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such as polymath, the Renaissance person.
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Actually, during the Renaissance period,
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it was considered the ideal to be well-versed in multiple disciplines.
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Barbara Sher refers to us as "scanners."
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Use whichever term you like, or invent your own.
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I have to say I find it sort of fitting that as a community,
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we cannot agree on a single identity.
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(Laughter)
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It's easy to see your multipotentiality
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as a limitation or an affliction that you need to overcome.
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But what I've learned through speaking with people
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and writing about these ideas on my website,
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is that there are some tremendous strengths to being this way.
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Here are three
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multipotentialite super powers.
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One: idea synthesis.
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That is, combining two or more fields
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and creating something new at the intersection.
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Sha Hwang and Rachel Binx drew from their shared interests
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in cartography, data visualization, travel, mathematics and design,
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when they founded Meshu.
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Meshu is a company that creates custom geographically-inspired jewelry.
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Sha and Rachel came up with this unique idea
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not despite, but because of their eclectic mix of skills and experiences.
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Innovation happens at the intersections.
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That's where the new ideas come from.
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And multipotentialites, with all of their backgrounds,
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are able to access a lot of these points of intersection.
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The second multipotentialite superpower
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is rapid learning.
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When multipotentialites become interested in something,
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we go hard.
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We observe everything we can get our hands on.
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We're also used to being beginners,
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because we've been beginners so many times in the past,
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and this means that we're less afraid of trying new things
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and stepping out of our comfort zones.
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What's more, many skills are transferable across disciplines,
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and we bring everything we've learned to every new area we pursue,
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so we're rarely starting from scratch.
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Nora Dunn is a full-time traveler and freelance writer.
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As a child concert pianist, she honed an incredible ability
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to develop muscle memory.
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Now, she's the fastest typist she knows.
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(Laughter)
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Before becoming a writer, Nora was a financial planner.
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She had to learn the finer mechanics of sales
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when she was starting her practice,
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and this skill now helps her write compelling pitches to editors.
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It is rarely a waste of time to pursue something you're drawn to,
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even if you end up quitting.
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You might apply that knowledge in a different field entirely,
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in a way that you couldn't have anticipated.
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The third multipotentialite superpower
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is adaptability;
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that is, the ability to morph into whatever you need to be
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in a given situation.
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Abe Cajudo is sometimes a video director, sometimes a web designer,
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sometimes a Kickstarter consultant, sometimes a teacher,
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and sometimes, apparently, James Bond.
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(Laughter)
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He's valuable because he does good work.
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He's even more valuable because he can take on various roles,
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depending on his clients' needs.
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Fast Company magazine identified adaptability
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as the single most important skill to develop in order to thrive
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in the 21st century.
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The economic world is changing so quickly and unpredictably
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that it is the individuals and organizations that can pivot
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in order to meet the needs of the market that are really going to thrive.
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Idea synthesis, rapid learning and adaptability:
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three skills that multipotentialites are very adept at,
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and three skills that they might lose if pressured to narrow their focus.
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As a society, we have a vested interest in encouraging multipotentialites
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to be themselves.
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We have a lot of complex, multidimensional problems in the world right now,
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and we need creative, out-of-the-box thinkers to tackle them.
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Now, let's say that you are, in your heart, a specialist.
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You came out of the womb knowing you wanted to be a pediatric neurosurgeon.
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Don't worry -- there's nothing wrong with you, either.
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(Laughter)
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In fact, some of the best teams are comprised of a specialist
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and multipotentialite paired together.
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The specialist can dive in deep and implement ideas,
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while the multipotentialite brings a breadth of knowledge to the project.
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It's a beautiful partnership.
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But we should all be designing lives and careers
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that are aligned with how we're wired.
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And sadly, multipotentialites are largely being encouraged
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simply to be more like their specialist peers.
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So with that said,
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if there is one thing you take away from this talk,
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I hope that it is this:
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embrace your inner wiring, whatever that may be.
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If you're a specialist at heart,
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then by all means, specialize.
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That is where you'll do your best work.
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But to the multipotentialites in the room,
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including those of you who may have just realized
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in the last 12 minutes that you are one --
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(Laughter)
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to you I say:
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embrace your many passions.
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Follow your curiosity down those rabbit holes.
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Explore your intersections.
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Embracing our inner wiring leads to a happier, more authentic life.
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And perhaps more importantly --
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multipotentialites, the world needs us.
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Thank you.
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(Applause)
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