12 truths I learned from life and writing | Anne Lamott

Prevodilac: Lidija Kacar Lektor: Ivana Korom

My seven-year-old grandson sleeps just down the hall from me,

Moj sedmogodišnji unuk spava dole niz hodnik od mene

and he wakes up a lot of mornings

i često ujutru kada se probudi

and he says,

kaže:

"You know, this could be the best day ever."

„Znaš, ovo bi mogao da bude najbolji dan ikada.“

And other times, in the middle of the night,

Drugi put, u sred noći

he calls out in a tremulous voice,

doziva me drhtavim glasom,

"Nana, will you ever get sick and die?"

„Bako, da li ćeš se ti ikada razboleti i umreti?“

I think this pretty much says it for me and most of the people I know,

Mislim da ovo prilično očigledno govori o meni i ljudima koje poznajem,

that we're a mixed grill of happy anticipation

da smo mešovit roštilj srećnog iščekivanja

and dread.

i očaja.

So I sat down a few days before my 61st birthday,

Pa sam ja sela nekoliko dana pre mog 61. rođendana,

and I decided to compile a list of everything I know for sure.

i odlučila sam da sastavim listu svega onoga što znam sa sigurnošću.

There's so little truth in the popular culture,

Toliko je malo istine u popularnoj kulturi

and it's good to be sure of a few things.

i dobra je stvar kada ste sigurni u nekoliko stvari.

For instance, I am no longer 47,

Na primer, ja više nemam 47 godina,

although this is the age I feel,

iako osećam da su to moje godine

and the age I like to think of myself as being.

i godine koje volim da verujem da imam.

My friend Paul used to say in his late 70s

Moj prijatelj Pol je govorio u svojim kasnim 70-im

that he felt like a young man with something really wrong with him.

da se osećao kao mladić s kojim nešto ozbiljno nije u redu.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

Our true person is outside of time and space,

Naša istinska ličnost je izvan prostora i vremena,

but looking at the paperwork,

ali gledajući u papirologiju,

I can, in fact, see that I was born in 1954.

ja mogu, zapravo, da vidim da sam rođena u 1954. godini.

My inside self is outside of time and space.

Moje unutrašnje biće je izvan prostora i vremena.

It doesn't have an age.

Ono nema godine.

I'm every age I've ever been, and so are you,

Ja sam sve godine koje sam ikada bila, i vi ste takođe,

although I can't help mentioning as an aside

iako ne mogu a da ne pomenem dodatno

that it might have been helpful if I hadn't followed

da bi možda bilo od pomoći da nisam pratila

the skin care rules of the '60s,

pravila za negu kože iz '60-ih,

which involved getting as much sun as possible

koja su uključivala izlaganje suncu što je više moguće

while slathered in baby oil

dok biste bili potpoljeni u ulje za bebe

and basking in the glow of a tinfoil reflector shield.

i tako se grejali u sjaju reflektora od folije.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

It was so liberating, though, to face the truth

Bilo je tako oslobađajuće, ipak, suočiti se sa istinom

that I was no longer in the last throes of middle age,

da ja više nisam bila u poslednjoj trci srednjih godina,

that I decided to write down every single true thing I know.

da sam odlučila da zapišem svaku pojedinačnu istinitu stvar koju znam.

People feel really doomed and overwhelmed these days,

Ljudi se osećaju prokletim i preplavljenim ovih dana,

and they keep asking me what's true.

i stalno me zapitkuju šta je istina.

So I hope that my list of things I'm almost positive about

Pa se nadam da će moja lista stvari oko kojih sam gotovo sigurna

might offer some basic operating instructions

možda pružiti neka osnovna efikasna uputstva

to anyone who is feeling really overwhelmed or beleaguered.

za sve koji se osećaju preplavljenim ili opkoljenim.

Number one:

Broj jedan:

the first and truest thing is that all truth is a paradox.

prva i najistinitija stvar jeste da je svaka istina paradoks.

Life is both a precious, unfathomably beautiful gift,

Život je istovremeno vredan i nesumnjivo predivan poklon,

and it's impossible here, on the incarnational side of things.

i nemoguće je ovde, na ovaploćenoj strani stvari.

It's been a very bad match

Ovo je bila veoma loša utakmica

for those of us who were born extremely sensitive.

za one od nas koji su rođeni ekstremno osetljivi.

It's so hard and weird that we sometimes wonder

Veoma je teško i čudno da se ponekad zapitamo

if we're being punked.

da li neko pokušava da nas nasamari.

It's filled simultaneously with heartbreaking sweetness and beauty,

Prepun je istovremeno srceparajućom slašću i lepotom,

desperate poverty,

očajničkom bedom,

floods and babies and acne and Mozart,

poplavama i bebama i aknama i Mocartom,

all swirled together.

svim tim u jednom zajedničkom vrtlogu.

I don't think it's an ideal system.

Ne mislim da je ovo idealan sistem.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

Number two: almost everything will work again

Broj dva: gotovo sve će ponovo raditi

if you unplug it for a few minutes --

ako ga isključite na nekoliko minuta -

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

(Applause)

(Aplauz)

including you.

uključujući i vas.

Three: there is almost nothing outside of you

Tri: Ne postoji gotovo ništa izvan vas

that will help in any kind of lasting way,

što će vam pomoći na bilo koji trajan način

unless you're waiting for an organ.

osim ako čekate na organ.

You can't buy, achieve or date serenity and peace of mind.

Ne možete da kupite, dostignete ili da budete u vezi sa spokojstvom i mirom uma.

This is the most horrible truth, and I so resent it.

Ovo je najodvratnija istina, stoga je ja prezirem.

But it's an inside job,

Ali to je unutrašnji posao,

and we can't arrange peace or lasting improvement

i mi ne možemo da uredimo mir ili trajno poboljšanje

for the people we love most in the world.

za ljude koje volimo najviše na svetu.

They have to find their own ways,

Oni moraju da pronađu sami svoj put,

their own answers.

njihove sopstvene odgovore.

You can't run alongside your grown children

Ne možete da trčite pored svoje odrasle dece

with sunscreen and ChapStick on their hero's journey.

sa kremom za sunčanje i labelom na njihovom herojskom putu.

You have to release them.

Morate da ih oslobodite.

It's disrespectful not to.

Nemate poštovanje prema njima ako to ne uradite.

And if it's someone else's problem,

I ako je nečiji drugi problem u pitanju,

you probably don't have the answer, anyway.

verovatno nemate odgovor, ionako.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

Our help is usually not very helpful.

Naša pomoć obično nije mnogo od pomoći.

Our help is often toxic.

Naša pomoć je često toksična.

And help is the sunny side of control.

A pomoć je sunčana strana kontrole.

Stop helping so much.

Prestanite da pomažete toliko.

Don't get your help and goodness all over everybody.

Nemojte da prosipate svoju pomoć i dobrotu po svima.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

(Applause)

(Aplauz)

This brings us to number four:

Ovo nas dovodi do broja četiri:

everyone is screwed up, broken, clingy and scared,

svako je upropašćen, slomljen, zahtevan i uplašen,

even the people who seem to have it most together.

čak i ljudi za koje deluje da sve drže pod kontrolom.

They are much more like you than you would believe,

Oni su mnogo više kao vi nego što možete da poverujete,

so try not to compare your insides to other people's outsides.

pa nemojte pokušavati da poredite svoju unutrašnjost sa tuđom spoljašnjosti.

It will only make you worse than you already are.

Samo će vam biti gore nego što već jeste.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

Also, you can't save, fix or rescue any of them

Takođe, ne možete da sačuvate, popravite ili spasite bilo koga od njih

or get anyone sober.

ili da bilo koga učinite treznim.

What helped me get clean and sober 30 years ago

Ono što je meni pomoglo da postanem čista i trezna pre 30 godina

was the catastrophe of my behavior and thinking.

bilo je koliko sam se katastrofalno ponašala i razmišljala.

So I asked some sober friends for help,

Pa sam pitala neke trezne prijatelje za pomoć,

and I turned to a higher power.

i okrenula sam se višoj sili.

One acronym for God is the "gift of desperation,"

Jedan akronim za boga je „poklon očaja“

G-O-D,

B - O - G (engl. GOD: gift of desperation),

or as a sober friend put it,

ili kako je trezan prijatelj rekao,

by the end I was deteriorating faster than I could lower my standards.

na kraju sam propadao brže nego što sam mogao da snizim svoje standarde.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

So God might mean, in this case,

Tako da bi bog, u ovom slučaju, mogao da znači

"me running out of any more good ideas."

„meni ponestaje dobrih ideja“.

While fixing and saving and trying to rescue is futile,

Dok je popravljanje i spašavanje i pokušaj da se spasi neko beskoristan,

radical self-care is quantum,

radikalna briga o sebi je kvantna

and it radiates out from you into the atmosphere

i sija iz vas u atmosferu

like a little fresh air.

kao malo svežeg vazduha.

It's a huge gift to the world.

Ogroman je poklon svetu.

When people respond by saying, "Well, isn't she full of herself,"

Kada ljudi odgovore tako što kažu: „Ona je baš puna sebe“,

just smile obliquely like Mona Lisa

samo se nasmejte diskretno kao Mona Liza

and make both of you a nice cup of tea.

i napravite oboma lepu šolju čaja.

Being full of affection for one's goofy, self-centered,

Biti pun pažnje za jednog blesavog, sebičnog,

cranky, annoying self

mrzovoljnog, dosadnog sebe

is home.

jeste kuća.

It's where world peace begins.

To je mesto gde započinje mir u svetu.

Number five:

Broj pet:

chocolate with 75 percent cacao is not actually a food.

čokolada sa 75 posto kakaa zapravo nije hrana.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

Its best use is as a bait in snake traps

Najbolje je da se upotrebi kao mamac u zamkama za zmije

or to balance the legs of wobbly chairs.

ili da se izjednače nogice klimave stolice.

It was never meant to be considered an edible.

Nikada nije trebalo da se smatra jestivom.

Number six --

Broj šest:

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

writing.

pisanje.

Every writer you know writes really terrible first drafts,

Svaki pisac koga znate piše zaista očajne prve verzije,

but they keep their butt in the chair.

ali oni ostaju na stolicama.

That's the secret of life.

To je tajna života.

That's probably the main difference between you and them.

To je najverovatnije glavna razlika između vas i njih.

They just do it.

Oni to prosto učine.

They do it by prearrangement with themselves.

Oni to rade u prethodnom dogovoru sa sobom.

They do it as a debt of honor.

Oni to rade kao obavezu prema časti.

They tell stories that come through them

Oni govore priče koje dolaze kroz njih

one day at a time, little by little.

jedan po jedan dan, malo po malo.

When my older brother was in fourth grade,

Kada je moj stariji brat bio četvrti razred,

he had a term paper on birds due the next day,

imao je seminarski rad o pticama koji je trebalo da preda sutradan

and he hadn't started.

a on još nije počeo.

So my dad sat down with him with an Audubon book,

Pa je moj otac seo sa njim, knjigom Audobona,

paper, pencils and brads --

papirom, olovkama i ekserima -

for those of you who have gotten a little less young and remember brads --

za one od vas koji su postali malo manje mladi i sećaju se eksera -

and he said to my brother,

i rekao je mom bratu,

"Just take it bird by bird, buddy.

„Samo uzmi jednu po jednu pticu, druže.“

Just read about pelicans

Samo pročitaj o pelikanima

and then write about pelicans in your own voice.

i onda piši o pelikanima svojim rečima.

And then find out about chickadees,

Onda saznaj o papagajima,

and tell us about them in your own voice.

i ispričaj nam o njima svojim rečima.

And then geese."

I onda o guskama.“

So the two most important things about writing are: bird by bird

Tako su dve najvažnije stvari u vezi sa pisanjem: ptica po ptica

and really god-awful first drafts.

i zaista očajna prva verzija.

If you don't know where to start,

Ako ne znate gde da počnete,

remember that every single thing that happened to you is yours,

zapamtite da svaka stvar koja vam se dogodila je vaša

and you get to tell it.

i vi imate priliku da je ispričate.

If people wanted you to write more warmly about them,

Ako su ljudi hteli da pišete toplije o njima,

they should've behaved better.

trebalo je da se bolje ponašaju.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

(Applause)

(Aplauz)

You're going to feel like hell if you wake up someday

Osećaćete se kao u paklu ako se probudite jednog dana

and you never wrote the stuff

i nikada niste napisali stvari

that is tugging on the sleeves of your heart:

koje vise sa rukava vašeg srca:

your stories, memories, visions and songs --

vaše priče, uspomene, vizije i pesme -

your truth,

vašu istinu,

your version of things --

vašu verziju stvari -

in your own voice.

vašim rečima.

That's really all you have to offer us,

To je zaista sve što možete da nam ponudite,

and that's also why you were born.

i to je takođe razlog zašto ste se rodili.

Seven: publication and temporary creative successes

Sedam: objavljivanja i trenutni kreativni uspesi

are something you have to recover from.

jesu nešto od čega morate da se oporavite.

They kill as many people as not.

Oni ubijaju isto onoliko ljudi koliko i ne ubiju.

They will hurt, damage and change you

Oni će vas boleti, oštetiti i promeniti

in ways you cannot imagine.

na načine koje ne možete da zamislite.

The most degraded and evil people I've ever known

Najdegradiraniji i zli ljudi koje sam ikad upoznala

are male writers who've had huge best sellers.

jesu muški pisci koji su imali velike bestselere.

And yet, returning to number one, that all truth is paradox,

Pa ipak, vraćajući se na broj jedan, da je sva istina paradoks,

it's also a miracle to get your work published,

takođe je čudo da objavite svoje delo,

to get your stories read and heard.

da učinite da se vaše priče pročitaju i čuju.

Just try to bust yourself gently of the fantasy

Probajte da oslobodite sebe nežno od fantazije

that publication will heal you,

da će vas objavljivanje izlečiti,

that it will fill the Swiss-cheesy holes inside of you.

da će ispuniti rupe nalik švajcarskom siru unutar vas.

It can't.

Ne može.

It won't.

Neće.

But writing can.

Ali pisanje može.

So can singing in a choir or a bluegrass band.

Tako može i pevanje u horu ili u blugras bendu.

So can painting community murals or birding

Pa i slikanje zajedničkih murala ili posmatranje ptica

or fostering old dogs that no one else will.

ili briga o starim psima o kojima niko drugi neće.

Number eight: families.

Broj osam: porodice.

Families are hard, hard, hard,

Porodice su teške, teške, teške,

no matter how cherished and astonishing they may also be.

bez obzira na to koliko dragocene i zapanjujuće takođe mogu da budu.

Again, see number one.

Opet, pogledajte broj jedan.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

At family gatherings where you suddenly feel homicidal or suicidal --

Na porodičnim okupljanjima gde se odjednom osetite ubilački

ili suicidalno nastrojeni -

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

remember that in all cases,

zapamtite da u je svim slučajevima,

it's a miracle that any of us, specifically, were conceived and born.

čudo da je bilo ko od nas, posebno, bio začet i rođen.

Earth is forgiveness school.

Zemlja je škola opraštanja.

It begins with forgiving yourself,

Počinje od opraštanja sebi,

and then you might as well start at the dinner table.

a zatim možete i da započnete od stola za večeru.

That way, you can do this work in comfortable pants.

Na taj način, ovaj posao možete da obavite u udobnim pantalonama.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

When William Blake said that we are here

Kada je Vilijam Blejk rekao da smo ovde

to learn to endure the beams of love,

kako bismo naučili da izdržimo zrake ljubavi,

he knew that your family would be an intimate part of this,

on je znao da će vaša porodica biti intimni deo ovoga,

even as you want to run screaming for your cute little life.

čak i dok želite da pobegnete vrišteći i boreći se za svoj slatki mali život.

But I promise you are up to it.

Ali obećavam vam da možete to da izdržite.

You can do it, Cinderella, you can do it,

Vi to možete, Pepeljugo, vi to možete,

and you will be amazed.

i bićete oduševljeni.

Nine: food.

Devet: hrana.

Try to do a little better.

Pokušajte to malo bolje.

I think you know what I mean.

Mislim da znate na šta mislim.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

Number 10 --

Broj 10 -

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

grace.

milost.

Grace is spiritual WD-40,

Milost je duhovni WD-40,

or water wings.

ili vodena krila.

The mystery of grace is that God loves Henry Kissinger and Vladimir Putin

Misterija milosti je u tome da bog voli Henrija Kisindžera i Vladimira Putina

and me

i mene

exactly as much as He or She loves your new grandchild.

isto onoliko koliko On ili Ona voli vaše novo unuče.

Go figure.

Zamislite to.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

The movement of grace is what changes us, heals us

Kretanje milosti je ono što nas menja, leči

and heals our world.

i leči naš svet.

To summon grace, say, "Help," and then buckle up.

Da biste prizvali milost, recite „pomoć“ i onda se vežite.

Grace finds you exactly where you are,

Milost vas pronalazi upravo tamo gde ste,

but it doesn't leave you where it found you.

ali vas ne ostavlja tamo gde vas je pronašla.

And grace won't look like Casper the Friendly Ghost,

I milost neće izgledati kao Kasper dobri duh,

regrettably.

nažalost.

But the phone will ring or the mail will come

Ali će telefon zvoniti ili će stići pošta

and then against all odds,

i onda uprkos svim šansama,

you'll get your sense of humor about yourself back.

vratiće vam se smisao za humor po pitanju vas.

Laughter really is carbonated holiness.

Smeh je zaista gazirana svetost.

It helps us breathe again and again

Pomaže nam da dišemo iznova i iznova

and gives us back to ourselves,

i daje nas ponovo nama samima

and this gives us faith in life and each other.

i ovo nam daje nadu u život i u nas međusobno.

And remember -- grace always bats last.

I zapamtite - milost uvek udara poslednja.

Eleven: God just means goodness.

Jedanaest: bog jednostavno znači dobrota.

It's really not all that scary.

Nije to sve tako strašno.

It means the divine or a loving, animating intelligence,

On znači božanski ili pun ljubavi, animirajuća inteligencija,

or, as we learned from the great "Deteriorata,"

ili, kao što smo naučili od sjajne „Deteriorate“

"the cosmic muffin."

„kosmički mafin“.

A good name for God is: "Not me."

Dobro ime za boga je: „Ne ja“.

Emerson said that the happiest person on Earth

Emerson je rekao da je najsrećnija osoba na svetu

is the one who learns from nature the lessons of worship.

ona koja uči od prirode lekcije obožavanja.

So go outside a lot and look up.

Idite napolje često i gledajte gore.

My pastor said you can trap bees on the bottom of mason jars without lids

Moj pastor je rekao da možete da zarobite pčele na dnu tegli bez poklopca

because they don't look up,

zato što ne gledaju gore,

so they just walk around bitterly bumping into the glass walls.

pa samo hodaju unaokolo ogorčene i udaraju u staklene zidove.

Go outside. Look up.

Idite napolje. Gledajte gore.

Secret of life.

Tajna života.

And finally: death.

I najzad: smrt.

Number 12.

Broj 12.

Wow and yikes.

Jee i uh.

It's so hard to bear when the few people you cannot live without die.

Tako je teško izdržati kada nekoliko ljudi bez kojih ne možete da živite umru.

You'll never get over these losses, and no matter what the culture says,

Nikada nećete preboleti ove gubitke, bez obzira na to šta kultura kaže,

you're not supposed to.

ni ne treba.

We Christians like to think of death as a major change of address,

Mi hrišćani volimo da verujemo da je smrt značajna promena adrese,

but in any case, the person will live again fully in your heart

ali u svakom slučaju, osoba će ponovo živeti u potpunosti u vašem srcu

if you don't seal it off.

ako ga ne zapečatite.

Like Leonard Cohen said, "There are cracks in everything,

Kao što je Lenard Koen rekao: „Postoje pukotine u svemu,

and that's how the light gets in."

i na taj način svetlost ulazi.“

And that's how we feel our people again fully alive.

I to je ono kako osećamo da naši ljudi u potpunosti ponovo žive.

Also, the people will make you laugh out loud

Takođe, ljudi će vas zasmejavati

at the most inconvenient times,

u najnezgodnijim trenucima

and that's the great good news.

i to su sjajne vesti.

But their absence will also be a lifelong nightmare of homesickness for you.

Ali će njihovo odsustvo biti celoživotna noćna mora nostalgije za kućom za vas.

Grief and friends, time and tears will heal you to some extent.

Žalost i prijatelji, vreme i suze će vas izlečiti u nekoj meri.

Tears will bathe and baptize and hydrate and moisturize you

Suze će okupati i krstiti i hidrirati i vlažiti vas

and the ground on which you walk.

i zemlju na kojoj hodate.

Do you know the first thing that God says to Moses?

Da li znate koja je prva stvar koju je bog rekao Mojsiju?

He says, "Take off your shoes."

On je rekao: „Skini svoje cipele.“

Because this is holy ground, all evidence to the contrary.

Zato što je ovo sveta zemlja, uprkos svim dokazima u suprotno.

It's hard to believe, but it's the truest thing I know.

Teško je da verujete, ali je to najistinitija stvar koju ja znam.

When you're a little bit older, like my tiny personal self,

Kada ste malo stariji, kao moja malenkost,

you realize that death is as sacred as birth.

shvatate da je smrt sveta kao rođenje.

And don't worry -- get on with your life.

I ne brinite - nastavite sa svojim životom.

Almost every single death is easy and gentle

Gotovo svaka pojedinačna smrt jeste laka i nežna

with the very best people surrounding you

sa najboljim ljudima koji vas okružuju

for as long as you need.

dok god vam je to potrebno.

You won't be alone.

Nećete biti sami.

They'll help you cross over to whatever awaits us.

Oni će vam pomoći da pređete do toga što nas čega.

As Ram Dass said,

Kao što je Ram Das rekao,

"When all is said and done,

„Kada je sve rečeno i učinjeno,

we're really just all walking each other home."

mi svi zapravo samo pratimo jedni druge kući.“

I think that's it,

Mislim da je to to,

but if I think of anything else,

ali ako smislim još nešto,

I'll let you know.

reći ću vam.

Thank you.

Hvala vam.

(Applause)

(Aplauz)

Thank you.

Hvala vam.

(Applause)

(Aplauz)

I was very surprised to be asked to come,

Zaista sam bila iznenađena kada su me pozvali da dođem,

because it is not my realm,

zato što to nije moja oblast,

technology or design or entertainment.

tehnologija, dizajn ili zabava.

I mean, my realm is sort of faith and writing

Mislim, moja oblast su vera i pisanje

and kind of lurching along together.

i neka vrsta zajedničkog teturanja.

And I was surprised,

I bila sam iznenađena,

but they said I could give a talk, and I said I'd love to.

ali oni su rekli da mogu da govorim i ja sam rekla da bih volela.

(Video) If you don't know where to start,

(Video) Ako ne znate gde da počnete,

remember that every single thing that happened to you is yours

zapamtite da svaka stvar koja vam se dogodila je vaša,

and you get to tell it.

imate priliku da je pričate.

Anne Lamott: People are very frightened and feel really doomed

Ana Lamot: Ljudi su veoma uplašeni i osećaju se zaista prokletim

in America these days,

u Americi ovih dana,

and I just wanted to help people get their sense of humor about it

I ja sam samo želela da pomognem ljudima da povrate smisao za humor

and to realize how much isn't a problem.

i da shvate koliko to nije problem.

If you take an action,

Ako preduzmete akciju,

take a really healthy or loving or friendly action,

preduzmete zaista zdravu ili punu ljubavi ili prijateljsku akciju,

you'll have loving and friendly feelings.

imaćete osećanja puna ljubavi i prijateljska osećanja.