Angela Patton: A father-daughter dance ... in prison | TED

Translator: Joseph Geni Reviewer: Morton Bast

Prevoditelj: Senzos Osijek Recezent: Suzana Baric

I was sitting with my girls,

Sjedila sam sa svojim djevojkama,

and Joy said,

a Joy je rekla:

"Dang, I wish he'd get off my back.

"K vragu, stvarno bih željela da me ostavi na miru.

My daddy, he calls me all the time."

Moj tata me stalno naziva."

"Lucky for you he calls at all," said Jasmine.

"Blago tebi što te uopće zove", rekla je Jasmine.

"I haven't heard from my dad in years."

"Meni se moj tata nije javio godinama."

At this moment, I knew the girls needed a way

U tom trenu znala sam da djevojke trebaju način

to connect with their fathers.

da se povežu sa svojim očevima.

At Camp Diva, my non-profit organization,

U kampu Diva, mojoj neprofitnoj organizaciji,

we have these types of conversations all the time

često vodimo takvu vrstu razgovora

as a way to help girls of African descent

te na taj način pomažemo djevojkama afričkog porijekla

prepare for their passage into womanhood.

u pripremi za prijelaz u život odrasle žene.

These girls just needed

Te su djevojke samo trebale

a way to invite their fathers into their lives

način na koji pozvati svoje očeve u svoj život

on their own terms.

prema vlastitim uvjetima.

So I asked the girls,

Stoga sam upitala djevojke:

"How can we help other girls

"Kako možemo pomoći drugim djevojkama

develop healthy relationships with their fathers?"

da razviju zdrav odnos sa svojim očevima?"

"Let's have a dance," one girl shouted,

"Održimo ples!", povikala je jedna djevojka,

and all the girls quickly backed her up.

a sve ostale djevojke su je podržale.

They started dreaming about the decorations,

Počele su sanjariti o ukrasima,

invitations, the dresses they were going to wear,

pozivnicama, haljinama koje će odjenuti

and what their fathers could and could not wear. (Laughter)

i onome što njihovi roditelji mogu i ne mogu odjenuti. (Smijeh)

It was off and running before I could even blink my eyes,

Sve je već započelo prije nego što sam trepnula,

but even if I could have slowed down those girls,

no čak i da sam mogla usporiti djevojke,

I wouldn't have,

ne bih to učinila

because one thing that I have learned

jer sam naučila jedno

from over a decade of working with girls

tijekom više od desetljeća rada s djevojkama,

is that they already know what they need.

a to je da one već znaju što trebaju.

The wisdom lives inside of them.

Mudrost živi u njima.

As long as they have infrastructure,

Sve dok imaju infrastrukturu,

mentorship and resources,

mentorstvo i sredstva,

they can build what they need,

mogu stvoriti ono što im treba;

not only to survive, but to thrive.

ne samo za preživljavanje, već i za napredovanje.

So we had a dance,

Dakle, imali smo ples

and girls and their fathers came in multitudes.

i došlo je mnogo djevojaka i njihovih očeva.

They were dressed to the nines.

Bili su svečano odjeveni.

They acted sweet.

Bili su dražesni.

(Laughter)

(Smijeh)

They acted silly.

Bili su luckasti.

They really enjoyed each other's company.

Zaista su uživali u međusobnom druženju.

It was a huge success.

Bio je to velik uspjeh.

And the girls decided to make it an annual event.

Djevojke su odlučile da to bude događaj koji će se održavati svake godine.

So as the seasons changed,

Godišnja su se doba izmjenjivala

and it was time to plan the dance again,

i došlo je vrijeme za planiranje novog plesa,

one girl named Brianna spoke up,

a djevojka Briana

and she said,

rekla je:

"My dad can't come to the dance,

"Moj tata ne može doći na ples

and this whole thing is making me sad."

i sve me to rastužuje."

"Why not?" the girls asked.

"Zašto ne može?", upitale su djevojke.

"Because he's in jail," she bravely admitted.

"Zato što je u zatvoru", hrabro je priznala.

"Well, can he just get out for a day?" one of the girls asked. (Laughter)

"Može li izaći samo na jedan dan?", upitala je jedna od djevojaka. (Smijeh)

"And come in shackles?

"I doći u lisicama?

That's worse than not having him here at all."

To je gore nego da uopće ne dođe."

At this moment, I saw an opportunity

Tad sam vidjela priliku

for the girls to rise to the occasion

da djevojke prihvate izazov

and to become their own heroes.

i postanu vlastiti junaci.

So I asked, "What do you think we should do about this?

Upitala sam: "Što mislite da bismo trebale napraviti u vezi toga?

We want every girl to experience the dance, right?"

Želimo da svaka djevojka iskusi ples, zar ne?"

So the girls thought for a moment,

Djevojke su kratko razmišljale,

and one girl suggested,

a jedna od njih je predložila:

"Why don't we just take the dance in the jail?"

"Zašto jednostavno ne održimo ples u zatvoru?"

Most of the girls doubted the possibility of that,

Većina djevojaka sumnjala je u tu mogućnost

and said, "Are you crazy?

pa su rekle: "Jesi li ti luda?

Who is going to allow a bunch of little girls,

Tko će dopustiti hrpi djevojčica

dressed up — " (Laughter)

odjevenim u haljine -- '' (Smijeh)

" — to come inside a jail and dance with their daddies in Spongebob suits?"

" -- da dođu u zatvor i plešu sa svojim očevima u spužva-bob odijelima?"

Because that's what they called them.

Tako su zvale zatvorska odijela.

I said, "Girls, well, well,

Ja sam rekla: "Djevojke, djevojke,

you never know unless you ask."

nikad nećete znati ako ne pitate."

So a letter was written to the Richmond City Sheriff,

Napisale smo pismo šerifu Richmonda,

signed collectively by each girl,

potpisale su ga sve djevojke,

and I would have to say, he is a very special sheriff.

a ja moram reći da je on vrlo poseban šerif.

He contacted me immediately and said,

Odmah me kontaktirao te rekao da,

whenever there is an opportunity to bring families inside,

kad god postoji mogućnost da se obitelji dovedu unutra,

his doors are always open.

njegova su vrata uvijek otvorena.

Because one thing he did know,

Jer znao je jednu stvar:

that when fathers are connected to their children,

kad su očevi povezani sa svojom djecom,

it is less likely that they will return.

manja je vjerojatnost da će se vratiti.

So,

Dakle,

16 inmates and 18 girls were invited.

pozvano je 16 zatvorenika i 18 djevojaka.

The girls were dressed in their Sunday best,

Djevojke su bile odjevene u svoju najbolju odjeću,

and the fathers traded in their yellow and blue jumpsuits

a očevi su zamijenili svoja žuta i plava zatvorska odijela

for shirts and ties.

košuljama i kravatama.

They hugged.

Zagrlili su se.

They shared a full catered meal of chicken and fish.

Podijelili su dostavljeni obrok, piletinu i ribu.

They laughed together.

Smijali su se zajedno.

It was beautiful.

Bilo je prekrasno.

The fathers and daughters even experienced

Očevi i kćeri čak su iskusili

an opportunity to have a physical connection,

priliku da budu i fizički povezani,

something that a lot of them didn't even have

nešto što mnogi od njih

for a while.

dugo uopće nisu imali.

Fathers were in a space where they were able to

Očevi su se nalazili u prostoru gdje su mogli

make their daughter's plate,

plesati sa svojim kćerima

and pull out her chair and extend his hand for a dance.

te im izvući stolicu i pružiti ruku za ples.

Even the guards cried.

Čak su i čuvari plakali.

But after the dance,

No nakon plesa,

we all realized that Dad still would be in jail.

shvatili smo da će očevi ipak morati ostati u zatvoru.

So we needed to create something

Trebali smo napraviti nešto

that they could take with them.

što bismo mogli ponijeti sa sobom.

So we brought in Flip cams,

Donijeli smo Flip kamere

and we had them look at the Flip cams

u koje su gledali

and just interview each other --

i intervjuirali jedni druge --

their messages, their thoughts.

svoje poruke, svoje misli.

This was going to be used as a touchstone

Ovo će koristiti kao podsjetnik

so when they started to miss each other

pa kad počnu nedostajati jedni drugima

and feel disconnected,

i osjećati se nepovezano,

they could reconnect through this image.

mogu se ponovno povezati kroz tu sliku.

I'll never forget that one girl looked in her father's eyes

Nikad neću zaboraviti kad je jedna djevojka pogledala svog oca u oči

with that camera and said,

s tom kamerom i rekla:

"Daddy, when you look at me, what do you see?"

"Tata, kad me pogledaš, što vidiš?"

Because our daddies are our mirrors

Jer naši su očevi naša zrcala

that we reflect back on

na koja se osvrćemo

when we decide about what type of man we deserve,

kad odlučujemo kakav tip muškarca zaslužujemo

and how they see us for the rest of our lives.

i kako nas oni vide do kraja našeg života.

I know that very well,

Ja to znam vrlo dobro

because I was one of the lucky girls.

jer sam bila jedna od sretnih djevojaka.

I have had

Moj je otac

my father in my life always.

uvijek bio u mom životu.

He's even here today.

Čak je i danas ovdje.

(Applause)

(Pljesak)

And that is why it is extremely special

I zato je za mene iznimno važno

for me to make sure that these girls

da su ove djevojke

are connected to their fathers,

povezane sa svojim očevima,

especially those who are separated

posebno one koje su odvojene

because of barbed wires and metal doors.

bodljikavim žicama i metalnim vratima.

We have just created a form

Upravo smo stvorili obrazac

for girls who have heavy questions on their heart

za djevojke koje imaju teška pitanja na srcu

to be in a position to ask their fathers those questions

da mogu pitati svoje očeve ta pitanja

and given the fathers the freedom to answer.

te da daju očevima slobodu odgovoriti.

Because we know that the fathers

Jer znamo da očevi

are even leaving with this one thought:

odlaze s jednom mišlju:

What type of woman am I preparing to put in the world?

"Kakav tip žene pripremam za ovaj svijet?"

Because a father is locked in

To što je otac zatvoren

does not mean he should be locked out

ne znači da bi trebao biti i isključen

of his daughter's life.

iz života svoje kćeri.

(Applause)

(Pljesak)