Roxane Gay: Confessions of a bad feminist | TED

Prevodilac: Milenka Okuka Lektor: Mile Živković

I am failing as a woman,

Podbacujem kao žena,

I am failing as a feminist.

podbacujem kao feministkinja.

I have passionate opinions about gender equality,

Imam strastvene stavove o rodnoj ravnopravnosti,

but I worry that to freely accept the label of "feminist,"

ali brinem da slobodnim prihvatanjem etikete "feministkinja",

would not be fair to good feminists.

ne ispadam poštena prema dobrim feministima.

I'm a feminist, but I'm a rather bad one.

Ja sam feministkinja, no prilično sam loša u tome.

Oh, so I call myself a Bad Feminist.

Avaj, pa sebe zovem lošom feministkinjom.

Or at least, I wrote an essay,

Bar sam napisala esej,

and then I wrote a book called "Bad Feminist,"

a kasnije i knjigu: "Loša feministkinja",

and then in interviews, people started calling me The Bad Feminist.

a posle su me u intervjuima počeli da zovu Lošom feministkinjom.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

So, what started as a bit of an inside joke with myself

Pa, ono što je počelo kao interna šala sa samom sobom

and a willful provocation,

i namerna provokacija,

has become a thing.

postalo je stvarnost.

Let me take a step back.

Dozvolite da se vratim unazad.

When I was younger,

Kada sam bila mlađa,

mostly in my teens and 20s,

uglavnom kao tinejdžerka i u dvadesetim,

I had strange ideas about feminists

imala sam čudne pretpostavke o feministkinjama,

as hairy, angry, man-hating, sex-hating women --

da su dlakave, ljute, mrziteljke muškaraca, žene koje preziru seks -

as if those are bad things.

kao da su to loše stvari.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

These days, I look at how women are treated the world over,

Ovih dana, posmatram kako se odnose prema ženama širom sveta

and anger, in particular, seems like a perfectly reasonable response.

i naročito se bes čini prilično razumnom reakcijom.

But back then,

Ali nekada

I worried about the tone people used

sam brinula zbog tona u glasu ljudi

when suggesting I might be a feminist.

kad bi pretpostavili da sam feministkinja.

The feminist label was an accusation,

Etiketa feministkinje je bila optužba,

it was an "F" word, and not a nice one.

to je bila ne baš lepa reč koja počinje na "f".

I was labeled a woman who doesn't play by the rules,

Bila sam označena kao žena koja ne igra prema pravilima,

who expects too much,

koja očekuje previše,

who thinks far too highly of myself,

koja ima izuzetno visoko mišljenje o sebi,

by daring to believe I'm equal -- (Coughs) -- superior to a man.

koja se usuđuje da veruje da je jednaka - (kašalj) - superiorna nad muškarcima.

You don't want to be that rebel woman,

Ne želite da budete ta buntovnica,

until you realize that you very much are that woman,

sve dok ne shvatite da baš i jeste ta žena

and cannot imagine being anyone else.

i da ne možete da zamislite da budete bilo šta drugo.

As I got older, I began to accept

Kako sam sazrevala, počela sam da prihvatam

that I am, indeed, a feminist, and a proud one.

to da sam uistinu feministkinja, i to ponosna.

I hold certain truths to be self-evident:

Ja smatram da su određene istine same po sebi očigledne:

Women are equal to men.

žene i muškarci su jednaki.

We deserve equal pay for equal work.

Zaslužujemo da budemo jednako plaćene za isti posao.

We have the right to move through the world as we choose,

Imamo pravo da se krećemo kroz svet kako poželimo,

free from harassment or violence.

slobodne od uznemiravanja ili nasilja.

We have the right to easy, affordable access to birth control,

Imamo pravo na lak, pristupačan pristup kontracepciji

and reproductive services.

i reproduktivnim službama.

We have the right to make choices about our bodies,

Imamo pravo da odlučujemo o svojim telima,

free from legislative oversight or evangelical doctrine.

nezavisno od zakonskih previda i jevanđelističkih doktrina.

We have the right to respect.

Imamo pravo na poštovanje.

There's more.

Ima tu još.

When we talk about the needs of women,

Kada govorimo o potrebama žena,

we have to consider the other identities we inhabit.

moramo da razmotrimo i druge identitete koje nastanjujemo.

We are not just women.

Mi nismo samo žene.

We are people with different bodies,

Mi smo ljudi različitih tela,

gender expressions, faiths, sexualities,

ispoljavanja pola, vere, seksualnosti,

class backgrounds, abilities, and so much more.

klasnog porekla, mogućnosti i još mnogo toga.

We need to take into account

Moramo da razmotrimo

these differences and how they affect us,

ove razlike i kako one utiču na nas,

as much as we account for what we have in common.

kao što i moramo da razmotrimo šta nam je zajedničko.

Without this kind of inclusion, our feminism is nothing.

Bez ovakve obuhvatnosti, naš feminizam je beznačajan.

I hold these truths to be self-evident, but let me be clear:

Držim da su ove istine očigledne, ali dozvolite da budem jasna:

I'm a mess.

ja sam nered.

I am full of contradictions.

Ispunjena sam kontradikcijama.

There are many ways in which I'm doing feminism wrong.

Ja feminizam praktikujem na mnogo pogrešnih načina.

I have another confession.

Imam još jedno priznanje.

When I drive to work, I listen to thuggish rap at a very loud volume.

Dok se vozim na posao, slušam neotesani rep prilično glasno.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

Even though the lyrics are degrading to women --

Iako u tekstovima pesama ponižavaju žene -

these lyrics offend me to my core --

ti tekstovi me vređaju do srži -

the classic Yin Yang Twins song "Salt Shaker" --

klasična pesma Yin Yang Twins-a, "Salt Shaker" (Slanik) -

it is amazing.

neverovatna je.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

"Make it work with your wet t-shirt.

"Učini to u mokroj majici.

Bitch, you gotta shake it 'til your camel starts to hurt!"

Kujo, moraš da treseš dok te pozadina ne zaboli!"

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

Think about it.

Zamislite to.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

Poetry, right?

Poezija, zar ne?

I am utterly mortified by my music choices.

Krajnje sam preplašena svojim muzičkim izborima.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

I firmly believe in man work,

Čvrsto verujem u muške poslove,

which is anything I don't want to do, including --

u koje uključujem sve što ne želim da radim -

(Laughter) --

(Smeh)

all domestic tasks,

znači sve kućne poslove,

but also: bug killing, trash removal, lawn care and vehicle maintenance.

ali takođe: ubijanje buba, bacanje smeća, briga o travnjaku i održavanje vozila.

I want no part of any of that.

Ne želim da učestvujem u tome.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

Pink is my favorite color.

Moja omiljena boja je roza.

I enjoy fashion magazines and pretty things.

Volim modne časopise i lepe stvari.

I watch "The Bachelor" and romantic comedies,

Gledam "Mladoženju" i romantične komedije

and I have absurd fantasies about fairy tales coming true.

i imam apsurdna maštanja o tome kako se bajke ostvaruju.

Some of my transgressions are more flagrant.

Neki moji prestupi su nepodnošljiviji.

If a woman wants to take her husband's name,

Ako žena želi da uzme muževo prezime,

that is her choice, and it is not my place to judge.

to je njen izbor i nije na meni da sudim.

If a woman chooses to stay home to raise her children,

Ako žena odluči da bude kod kuće i odgaja decu,

I embrace that choice, too.

i taj izbor prihvatam.

The problem is not that she makes herself economically vulnerable in that choice;

Nije problem u tome što ona sebe tada dovodi u ekonomski ranjiv položaj;

the problem is that our society is set up

problem je što je naše društvo tako udešeno

to make women economically vulnerable when they choose.

da žene postaju ekonomski ranjive, ako naprave taj izbor.

Let's deal with that.

Pozabavimo se time.

(Applause)

(Aplauz)

I reject the mainstream feminism

Odbacujem matični feminizam

that has historically ignored or deflected the needs

koji je kroz istoriju ignorisao ili se oglušivao o potrebe

of women of color, working-class women, queer women and transgender women,

obojenih žena, žena iz radničke klase, lezbejki i transpolnih žena,

in favor of supporting white, middle- and upper-class straight women.

zarad podrške heteroseksualnih belkinja iz srednje i više klase.

Listen, if that's good feminism -- I am a very bad feminist.

Slušajte, ako je to dobar feminizam - ja sam veoma loša feministkinja.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

There is also this:

Imamo i sledeće:

As a feminist, I feel a lot of pressure.

kao feministkinja, osećam izuzetan pritisak.

We have this tendency to put visible feminists on a pedestal.

Imamo tendenciju da stavljamo vidljive feministe na pijedestal.

We expect them to pose perfectly.

Očekujemo od njih da se ponašaju savršeno.

When they disappoint us,

Kada nas razočaraju,

we gleefully knock them from the very pedestal we put them on.

rado ih oborimo sa postolja na koje smo ih postavili.

Like I said, I am a mess --

Kao što sam rekla, ja sam nered -

consider me knocked off that pedestal

smatrajte da sam oborena sa postolja,

before you ever try to put me up there.

pre no što pomislite da me stavite na njega.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

Too many women,

Isuviše mnogo žena,

particularly groundbreaking women and industry leaders,

naročito revolucionarki i industrijskih vođa

are afraid to be labeled as feminists.

se plaši da bude označeno kao feministkinja.

They're afraid to stand up and say, "Yes, I am a feminist,"

Plaše se da istupe i kažu: "Da, ja sam feministkinja",

for fear of what that label means,

iz straha od onoga šta ta oznaka predstavlja,

for fear of being unable to live up to unrealistic expectations.

iz straha od nemogućnosti dosezanja nerealnih očekivanja.

Take, for example, Beyoncé, or as I call her, The Goddess.

Uzmite, na primer, Bijonse ili kako je ja zovem: Boginja.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

She has emerged, in recent years, as a visible feminist.

Ona se u skorašnje vreme pojavljuje kao vidljiva feministkinja.

At the 2014 MTV Video Music Awards,

Na Dodeli MTV muzičkih nagrada 2014,

she performed in front of the word "feminist" 10 feet high.

nastupala je ispred reči "feminist" visoke tri metra.

It was a glorious spectacle to see

Bio je to veličanstven prizor za videti,

this pop star openly embracing feminism

kako ova pop zvezda otvoreno prihvata feminizam

and letting young women and men know

i daje do znanja devojkama i momcima

that being a feminist is something to celebrate.

da je feminizam nešto što treba da se slavi.

As the moment faded, cultural critics began endlessly debating

Kako je momenat bledeo, kritičari kulture počeli su sa beskrajnim debatama

whether or not Beyoncé was, indeed, a feminist.

o tome da li je ili nije Bijonse uistinu feministkinja.

They graded her feminism,

Ocenjivali su njen feminizam,

instead of simply taking a grown, accomplished woman at her word.

umesto da prosto poveruju na reč odrasloj, uspešnoj ženi.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

(Applause)

(Aplauz)

We demand perfection from feminists,

Zahtevamo savršenstvo od feministkinja

because we are still fighting for so much,

jer se još uvek borimo za toliko toga,

we want so much,

želimo toliko toga,

we need so damn much.

potrebno nam je prokleto mnogo.

We go far beyond reasonable, constructive criticism,

Idemo daleko preko razumne, konstruktivne kritike,

to dissecting any given woman's feminism,

kako bismo secirali feminizam bilo koje žene,

tearing it apart until there's nothing left.

rasparčavamo ga dok ne ostane ništa.

We do not need to do that.

Ne moramo to da radimo.

Bad feminism -- or really, more inclusive feminism -- is a starting point.

Loš feminizam - ili zaista, obuhvatniji feminizam - je početak.

But what happens next?

Ali šta će onda da se desi?

We go from acknowledging our imperfections to accountability,

Krenimo od prihvatanja naših nesavršenosti do odgovornosti,

or walking the walk, and being a little bit brave.

ili delajmo kako govorimo i budimo malčice hrabrije.

If I listen to degrading music,

Ako slušam muziku koja me ponižava,

I am creating a demand for which artists are more than happy

stvaram potražnju za kojom će umetnici veoma rado

to contribute a limitless supply.

da obezbede beskonačnu ponudu.

These artists are not going to change

Ovi umetnici neće promeniti

how they talk about women in their songs

način na koji govore o ženama u pesmama

until we demand that change by affecting their bottom line.

sve dok mi ne zatražimo promenu, udarajući ih po džepu.

Certainly, it is difficult.

Svakako da je teško.

Why must it be so catchy?

Zašto moraju da budu tako zarazne?

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

It's hard to make the better choice,

Teško je napraviti bolji izbor

and it is so easy to justify a lesser one.

i tako je lako pravdati lošiji.

But --

Ali -

when I justify bad choices,

kada pravdam loše izbore,

I make it harder for women to achieve equality,

otežavam ženama da postignu jednakost,

the equality that we all deserve,

jednakost koju svi zaslužujemo

and I need to own that.

i ja moram da ovladam time.

I think of my nieces, ages three and four.

Mislim na svoje nećake od tri i četiri godine.

They are gorgeous and headstrong, brilliant girls,

Prelepe su i tvrdoglave, briljantne devojčice,

who are a whole lot of brave.

koje su izuzetno hrabre.

I want them to thrive in a world where they are valued

Želim im da budu uspešne u svetu u kom su cenjene

for the powerful creatures they are.

zbog toga što su jaka bića.

I think of them,

Pomislim na njih,

and suddenly, the better choice becomes far easier to make.

i iznenada je bolje izbore sve lakše napraviti.

We can all make better choices.

Svi možemo da pravimo bolje izbore.

We can change the channel when a television show

Možemo promeniti program kada u televizijskoj emisiji

treats sexual violence against women like sport,

tretiraju kao sport seksualno nasilje nad ženama,

Game of Thrones.

"Igra prestola".

We can change the radio station

Možemo da promenimo radio stanicu

when we hear songs that treat women as nothing.

kada čujemo pesme koje nipodaštavaju žene.

We can spend our box office dollars elsewhere

Možemo da trošimo novac od bioskopskih ulaznica drugde

when movies don't treat women

kada na filmovima tretiraju žene

as anything more than decorative objects.

kao puki ukras.

We can stop supporting professional sports

Možemo prestati da pratimo profesionalne sportove

where the athletes treat their partners like punching bags.

čiji sportisti tretiraju svoje partnerke kao vreće za udaranje.

(Applause)

(Aplauz)

In other ways, men -- and especially straight white men --

S druge strane, muškarci - a naročito heteroseksualni belci -

can say, "No, I will not publish with your magazine,

mogu da kažu: "Ne, neću da me objavljujete u vašem časopisu,

or participate in your project, or otherwise work with you,

ili da učestvujem u vašem projektu ili bilo kako s vama da sarađujem,

until you include a fair number of women,

dok ne uključite određen broj žena,

both as participants and decision makers.

i kao učesnika i kao donosilaca odluka.

I won't work with you until your publication,

Neću s vama sarađivati, dok vaša publikacija

or your organization, is more inclusive of all kinds of difference."

ili vaša organizacija ne počne da uključuje razne različitosti."

Those of us who are underrepresented

Mi, koji smo zapostavljeni,

and invited to participate in such projects,

a pozovu nas da učestvujemo u sličnim projektima,

can also decline to be included

možemo takođe da odbijemo učešće

until more of us are invited through the glass ceiling,

sve dok više nas propuste kroz diskriminatorske barijere,

and we are tokens no more.

i ne prestanemo da budemo simbolični.

Without these efforts,

Bez ovih napora,

without taking these stands,

bez zauzimanja ovakvog stava,

our accomplishments are going to mean very little.

naša dostignuća neće mnogo da znače.

We can commit these small acts of bravery

Možemo da počinimo ove malene činove hrabrosti

and hope that our choices trickle upward to the people in power --

i da se nadamo da će naši izbori da prodru do ljudi na vlasti -

editors, movie and music producers,

do izdavača, filmskih i muzičkih producenata,

CEOs, lawmakers --

izvršnih direktora, zakonodavaca -

the people who can make bigger, braver choices

ljudi koji mogu da naprave veće, hrabrije izbore

to create lasting, meaningful change.

kako bi smo stvorili trajniju, smisleniju promenu.

We can also boldly claim our feminism --

Možemo i hrabrije da ispoljavamo svoj feminizam -

good, bad, or anywhere in between.

dobar, loš ili bilo kakav između toga.

The last line of my book "Bad Feminist" says,

Poslednje reči moje knjige "Loša feministkinja" glase:

"I would rather be a bad feminist than no feminist at all."

"Radije ću da budem loša feministkinja nego da uopšte ne budem feministkinja."

This is true for so many reasons,

Ovo je tačno iz mnogo razloga,

but first and foremost, I say this because once upon a time,

ali pre i iznad svega, kažem ovo jer nekada davno

my voice was stolen from me,

glas mi je ukraden

and feminism helped me to get my voice back.

i feminizam mi je pomogao da ga povratim.

There was an incident.

Desio mi se incident.

I call it an incident so I can carry the burden of what happened.

Zovem to incidentom kako bih mogla da se nosim s njegovim teretom.

Some boys broke me,

Neki dečaci su me slomili,

when I was so young, I did not know

kad sam bila suviše mlada, nisam znala

what boys can do to break a girl.

šta dečaci mogu da urade da slome devojku.

They treated me like I was nothing.

Nipodaštavali su me.

I began to believe I was nothing.

Počela sam da verujem da sam ništa.

They stole my voice, and in the after,

Ukrali su mi glas i kao posledica toga,

I did not dare to believe

nisam se usuđivala da verujem

that anything I might say could matter.

da bilo šta to kažem može da bude značajno.

But --

Ali -

I had writing.

imala sam pisanje.

And there, I wrote myself back together.

A pisanjem sam se iznova osmislila.

I wrote myself toward a stronger version of myself.

Pisanjem sam stvarala snažniju verziju sebe same.

I read the words of women

Čitam reči žena

who might understand a story like mine,

koje bi možda mogle da razumeju priču poput moje

and women who looked like me,

i žene koje su izgledale kao ja

and understood what it was like to move through the world with brown skin.

i koje su razumele kako se kretati kroz svet s tamnom kožom.

I read the words of women who showed me I was not nothing.

Čitam reči žena koje su mi pokazale da nisam ništa.

I learned to write like them,

Naučila sam da pišem kao one,

and then I learned to write as myself.

a potom sam pronašla svoj stil.

I found my voice again,

Povratila sam svoj glas

and I started to believe that my voice is powerful beyond measure.

i počela sam da verujem da je moj glas beskrajno moćan.

Through writing and feminism,

Kroz pisanje i feminizam,

I also found that if I was a little bit brave,

takođe sam otkrila da kad bih bila iole hrabrija,

another woman might hear me and see me and recognize

neka druga žena bi me možda čula, videla i spoznala

that none of us are the nothing the world tries to tell us we are.

da niko od nas nije ništa, iako nam svet to poručuje.

In one hand,

U jednoj ruci

I hold the power to accomplish anything.

držim moć kojom mogu da ostvarim bilo šta.

And in my other,

A u drugoj

I hold the humbling reality that I am just one woman.

držim skromnu stvarnost da sam samo jedna žena.

I am a bad feminist,

Ja sam loša feministkinja,

I am a good woman,

ja sam dobra žena,

I am trying to become better in how I think,

trudim se da budem bolja u svojim razmišljanjima,

and what I say, and what I do,

rečima i delima,

without abandoning everything that makes me human.

a da ne napustim sve što me čini ljudskim bićem.

I hope that we can all do the same.

Nadam se da svi možemo da učinimo isto.

I hope that we can all be a little bit brave,

Nadam se da svi možemo biti malčice hrabri,

when we most need such bravery.

kad nam je takva hrabrost neophodna.

(Applause)

(Aplauz)