LEGO for grownups | Hillel Cooperman

翻译人员: Xiaoqiao Xie 校对人员: Bin Xie

So, these are

我们都有黑暗时代。

the Dark Ages.

我说的

And the Dark Ages are the time between

黑暗时代是指

when you put away the LEGO

在你还是一个孩子，

for the last time as a kid,

最后一次玩毕放下乐高积木的时候，

and you decide as an adult that it is okay to play with a kid's toy.

和你已经长大成人，决定重新开始玩这个看起来是给小孩子玩的玩具的时候，之间的这段日子。

Started out with my then four-year-old:

就拿我来说吧，当我儿子四岁时，

"Oh, should buy the kid some LEGO.

（我说：）“是时候给他玩乐高积木了。

That stuff's cool."

那个挺好玩的。”

Walked into the LEGO store.

我就跑去乐高专卖店，

Bought him this.

给他买了这个。

It's totally appropriate for a four-year-old.

这看起来倒真像是给四岁的孩子玩的（其实不然）。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

I think the box says --

我想盒子上写着 ——

let's see here --

让我们看这边 ——

"8 to 12" on it.

“八岁到十二岁”。

I turn to my wife and said, "Who are we buying this for?"

我问我太太：“到底我们这是给谁买呀？”

She's like, "Oh, us." I'm like, "Okay. All right. That's cool."

她回答：“哦，给我们自己吧。” 我说：“也成，好吧，那也挺好的。”

Pretty soon it got a little bit out of control.

没多久事情就失控啦。

The dining room looked like this.

我们的餐厅变成了这个样子。

You walk there, and it hurts.

你走进去脚都硌得疼。

So we took a room downstairs in the basement

所以我们就启用了地下室的一个房间，

that had been used as sort of an Abu Ghraib annex.

以前是用来虐待人的。（笑话）

(Laughter)

（笑声）

Torture, very funny.

（我说我在家）虐待（人），（你们却觉得）好笑，

Wow, you guys are great.

哇，你们这帮听众真酷。

And we put down those little floor tiles,

然后我们就换掉了这些地砖。

and then I went onto eBay

我就跑去易趣

and bought 150 pounds of LEGO --

买了150磅重的乐高——

(Laughter)

（笑声）

which is insane.

这有点抽疯。

My daughter -- the day we got it, I was tucking her in --

我女儿——我们买到手这些乐高那天晚上，临睡前我给她把被子掖好——

and I said,

我说：

"Honey, you're my treasure."

“宝贝，你是我的宝贝。”

And she said, "No, the LEGO is the treasure."

她说：“不对，乐高才是宝贝。”

(Laughter)

（笑声）

And then she said, "Dad, we're LEGO rich."

接着她说：“爸爸，我们发乐高财了。”

I was like, "Yeah.

我说：“对，

I suppose we are."

我们是发乐高财了。”

So then once you do that

当你做了这么疯狂的事，

you're like, "Oh, crap. Where am I going to put all this?"

你就觉得：“噢，坏了，我把它们搁哪儿呀？”

So you go to The Container Store

你就会去卖整理箱的地方，

and spend an enormous amount of money,

花一大堆钱（买好多整理箱）。

and then you start this crazy sorting process

然后你就分门别类的收拾吧。

that never --

没个头——

it's just nuts.

简直就是发疯。

Whatever.

无所谓啦。

So then you realize there are these conventions.

接着你就开始注意到这些集会。

And you go to one of these conventions, and some dude built the Titanic.

你去了一个这种集会，看到别人竟然堆了个泰坦尼克号出来，

And you're like, "Holy shit!

你就会说：“老天呀！

He had to come in like a truck,

他得拿卡车

a semi, with this thing."

或者半挂车，来装这个玩意儿。”

And then someone built this -- this is the Smith Tower in Seattle.

接着有人做了这个——这是模拟西雅图的史密斯塔。

Just beautiful.

美极了。

And there's a dude selling these

接着有人卖这个，

aftermarket weapons for LEGO,

给乐高补充的武器装备。

because LEGO -- the Danish --

因为乐高吧——这些丹麦人——

no, they're not into guns.

他们倒不迷恋武器，

But the Americans? Oh, we'll make some guns for LEGO, no problem.

但是美国佬？哇，我们当然会给乐高添上武器了。不在话下。

And at a certain point, you look around,

后来到一定的程度，你左右环顾一下，

you're like, "Whoa, this is a really nerdy crowd."

你会说：“哇塞，这可真是一帮疯子。”

And I mean like this is a nerdy crowd,

我是说比一般的疯子

but that's like a couple of levels above furries.

要疯上好几倍

(Laughter)

（笑声）

The nerds here, they get laid --

这帮疯子，他们特别自在——

except for the lady with the condoms in her pocket --

除了那个老带着个避孕套的女生——

and you say to yourself at some point,

我就对自己说

"Am I part of this group? Like, am I into this?"

“我也是他们的一份子么？我也好这个调调么？”

And I was just like, "Yeah, I guess I am.

我回答自己：“对呀。我想我也是。

I'm coming out.

我应该告诉大家。

I'm kind of into this stuff, and I'm going to stop being embarrassed."

我喜欢乐高，我不应该觉得羞愧。”

So then you really get into it,

之后你就彻底掉进去了。

and you're like, "Well, the LEGO people in Denmark, they've got all this software

你会说：“好的，丹麦的乐高公司，他们有电脑软件

to let you build your own virtually."

可以让你自己设计乐高。

And so this is like this CAD program where you build it.

比如这个电脑辅助设计的软件。

And then whatever you design virtually,

你可以假装搭一个积木，点击采购所有的零件，

you click the button and it shows up at your doorstep a week later.

一周后就送货上门了。

And then some of the designs that people do

有些好的设计

they actually sell in the store.

他们还真在店里卖。

The LEGO guys don't give you any royalties, strangely,

这些卖乐高的人也不给你什么专利，奇怪吧。

but some user made this and then it sold.

但是有人用软件做了了么个东西，后来还卖钱了。

And it's pretty amazing actually.

特神。

Then you notice that if that

接下来你会发现，

LEGO-provided CAD program isn't enough,

如果乐高公司的电脑软件还不够，

there's an entire open-source, third-party,

还有别的人，独立于乐高公司的

independent LEGO CAD program

资源共享的那种电脑软件商。

that lets you do 3D modeling

你可以用他们的软件做立体模型，

and 3D rendering

立体表演，

and make, in fact, movies out of LEGO,

还可以做出乐高电影来。

3D films

立体的影片。

of which there are thousands on YouTube,

Youtube上有成千上万这样的电影。

and some of them sort of mimicking famous films

有些模仿已成名的电影片段，

and some totally original content --

有些是原创的。

just beautiful --

美极了。

and people recreating all sorts of things.

人们还重现了一些东西。

I have to take a moment.

我得花点时间说说这个。

I love the guy who's like running away

我喜欢这个像是要跑的人

with his clasps, his hooks.

拿着钩子夹子的。

Okay. Anyway.

就这样。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

There's a whole programming language and robotics tool,

我们有整个一个编码语言，还有机器人技术。

so if you want to teach someone how to program,

如果你想教人编程，

kid, adult, whatever it is.

孩子啦，成人啦，都行。

And the guy that made this,

做这个的人，

he made a slot machine out of LEGO.

他拿乐高做了个投币自动售货机。

And I don't mean he made LEGO that looked like a slot machine;

不是说他用乐高搭了一个像投币自动售货机一样的东西，

I mean he made a slot machine out of LEGO.

我是说他真的用乐高做出了一个投币自动售货机。

The insides were LEGO.

里面的部件全是乐高。

There's people getting drunk building LEGO,

有的人边做边喝，

and you've got to finish the thing before you puke.

你可得在吐得一塌糊涂前做完才行。

There's a whole gray market for LEGO,

乐高也有地下市场，

thousands of home-based businesses.

成千上万的家庭型工厂。

And some people will fund their entire LEGO habit

有人为了能挣钱玩乐高，

by selling the little guy,

还卖这些东西 。

but then you have no guys in your ships.

只是船上没人罢了。

And then, just some examples. This stuff really is sculpture.

这里有些例子。这个东西像是个雕塑品。

This is amazing what you can do.

简直无法想象你能用乐高做到这一步。

And don't kid yourself:

不是开玩笑的，

some architectural details, incredible organic shapes

这些建筑上的细节，这些绝妙的生物形体，

and just, even, nature out of, again, little blocks.

这些仅仅是靠着这些小小的积木的自然魅力。

This is my house.

这是我的乐高房子。

And this is my house.

这是我的真房子。

I was afraid a car was going to come smash it

我给你们照这张照片的时候

as I was taking a picture for you guys.

特别担心有车过来轧坏了我的乐高房子。

Anyway, I'm out of time.

我没时间继续了。

But just very quickly --

但是快速地——

we'll just see if I can do this quick.

让我们看看我能不能完成这个。

Because there aren't enough TED logos around here.

这间屋里TED的标志有点不够。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

Let's see here.

看这里。

Okay.

好了。

Ta-da.

完成了！

(Applause)

（掌声）