Janine Shepherd: A broken body isn't a broken person

Translator: Joseph Geni Reviewer: Morton Bast

Prevodilac: Tereza Ivanovic Lektor: Ivana Krivokuća

Life is about opportunities -- creating them and embracing them.

Život se sastoji od prilika,

stvaranja prilika i prihvatanja istih,

And for me, that was the Olympic dream.

a za mene to je bio san o Olimpijadi.

To me je određivalo. To je bila moja sreća.

That's what defined me. That was my bliss.

As a cross-country skier and member of the Australian ski team

Kao skijaška trkačica i članica australijskog skijaškog tima,

headed towards the Winter Olympics,

uoči Zimskih olimpijskih igara,

trenirala sam na biciklu, sa ostalim članovima tima.

I was on a training bike ride with my fellow teammates.

As we made our way up towards the spectacular Blue Mountains

Dok smo se uspinjali

ka čudesnim Modrim planinama, zapadno od Sidneja,

west of Sydney,

it was the perfect autumn day:

bio je savršen jesenji dan:

sunshine, the smell of eucalypt and a dream.

sunce, miris eukaliptusa i san.

Life was good.

Život je bio dobar.

We'd been on our bikes for around five-and-a-half hours

Bili smo već pet i po sati na biciklima,

kada smo stigli do dela puta koji sam volela,

when we got to the part of the ride that I loved,

and that was the hills, because I loved the hills.

a to su bila brda, obožavala sam brda.

I got up off the seat of my bike and I started pumping my legs,

Ustala sam sa sedišta,

noge su mi bridele, i dok sam udisala hladan planinski vazduh,

and as I sucked in the cold mountain air, I could feel it burning my lungs,

osećala sam kako mi gori u plućima i pogledala sam gore

and I looked up to see the sun shining in my face.

da mi sunce obasja lice.

And then everything went black.

I tada je sve pocrnelo.

Where was I? What was happening?

Gde sam? Šta se događa?

My body was consumed by pain.

Telo mi je bilo obuzeto bolom.

I'd been hit by a speeding utility truck

Udario me je kamion,

with only 10 minutes to go on the bike ride.

deset minuta pred kraj vožnje.

I was airlifted from the scene of the accident by a rescue helicopter

Prevezli su me sa lica mesta

spasilačkim helikopterom do odeljenja za povrede kičme u Sidneju.

to a large spinal unit in Sydney.

I had extensive and life-threatening injuries.

Imala sam teške povrede, opasne po život.

I'd broken my neck and my back in six places.

Slomila sam vrat i leđa na šest mesta.

I broke five ribs on my left side.

Slomila sam pet rebara sa leve strane.

I broke my right arm. I broke my collarbone.

Slomila sam desnu ruku i ključnu kost.

I broke some bones in my feet.

Slomila sam i kosti u stopalima.

My whole right side was ripped open, filled with gravel.

Čitava desna strana mi se rasporila i napunila šljunkom.

My head was cut open across the front, lifted back,

Glava mi je bila rasečena spreda, zabačena nazad, sa otkrivenom lobanjom.

exposing the skull underneath.

I had head injures. I had internal injuries.

Imala sam povrede glave i unutrašnje povrede.

I had massive blood loss.

Imala sam veliki gubitak krvi, oko pet litara,

In fact, I lost about five liters of blood,

which is all someone my size would actually hold.

to je celokupna količina koju čovek moje veličine ima.

By the time the helicopter arrived at Prince Henry Hospital in Sydney,

Kad je helikopter stigao u bolnicu Princ Henri u Sidneju,

my blood pressure was 40 over nothing.

krvni pritisak mi je bio 40 sa nula.

I was having a really bad day.

Stvarno sam imala loš dan. (Smeh)

(Laughter)

For over 10 days, I drifted between two dimensions.

Više od deset dana sam lebdela između dve dimenzije.

Bila sam svesna da sam u svom telu

I had an awareness of being in my body,

but also being out of my body, somewhere else,

ali i da sam van njega, negde drugde, gledajući odozgo,

watching from above, as if it was happening to someone else.

kao da se sve to dešava nekom drugom.

Zašto bih želela da se vratim u to slomljeno telo?

Why would I want to go back to a body that was so broken?

But this voice kept calling me:

Ali neki glas me je uporno dozivao: „Hajde, ostani sa mnom.“

"Come on, stay with me."

"No, it's too hard."

„Neću. Preteško je.“

"Come on. This is our opportunity."

„Hajde. Ovo je naša šansa.“

"No. That body is broken. It can no longer serve me."

„Neću. Telo mi je slomljeno. Ne može više da mi služi.“

"Come on. Stay with me. We can do it. We can do it together."

„Hajde, ostani sa mnom. Uspećemo. Zajedno ćemo uspeti.“

I was at a crossroads.

Bila sam na prekretnici.

I knew if I didn't return to my body, I'd have to leave this world forever.

Znala sam da, ako se ne vratim u svoje telo,

moraću da napustim ovaj svet zauvek.

It was the fight of my life.

To je bila moja životna borba.

After 10 days, I made the decision to return to my body.

Posle 10 dana sam odlučila da se vratim svom telu,

And the internal bleeding stopped.

i unutrašnje krvarenje je prestalo.

The next concern was whether I would walk again,

Sledeća briga je bila hoću li moći ponovo hodati,

because I was paralyzed from the waist down.

jer sam bila oduzeta od struka nadole.

They said to my parents that the neck break was a stable fracture,

Roditeljima su rekli da je prelom vrata stabilan,

ali leđa su bila zdrobljena.

but the back was completely crushed:

Pršljen L1 je bio kao kad vam ispadne kikiriki,

the vertebra at L1 was like you'd dropped a peanut,

stepped on it, smashed it into thousands of pieces.

pa ga zgazite i smrvite u hiljade delića.

They'd have to operate.

Morali su da me operišu.

They went in. They put me on a beanbag.

Ušli su unutra. Stavili su me na vreću za sedenje.

They cut me -- literally cut me in half.

Bukvalno su me presekli na pola, imam ožiljak koji mi obavija celo telo.

I have a scar that wraps around my entire body.

They picked as much broken bone as they could

Povadili su što su više mogli slomljenih kostiju

koje su se zarile u kičmenu moždinu.

that had lodged in my spinal cord.

They took out two of my broken ribs and they rebuilt my back --

Izvadili su mi dva polomljena rebra i ponovo sastavili moja leđa,

L1, they rebuilt it, they took out another broken rib,

izgradili su L1, izvadili još jedno slomljeno rebro,

they fused T12, L1 and L2 together.

spojili su pršljene T12, L1 i L2.

Then they stitched me up; they took an entire hour to stitch me up.

Zatim su me ušili. Ušivali su me ceo sat.

I woke up in intensive care,

Probudila sam se na intenzivnoj nezi.

and the doctors were really excited that the operation had been a success,

Lekari su bili ushićeni jer je operacija uspela,

jer sam u toj fazi mogla malo da pokrenem nožni palac,

because at that stage, I had a little bit of movement

in one of my big toes,

i pomislila sam: „Odlično, ići ću na Olimpijadu!“

and I thought, "Great, because I'm going to the Olympics!"

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

I had no idea.

Pojma nisam imala.

That's the sort of thing that happens to someone else, not me, surely.

To je nešto što se događa drugima, a ne meni.

But then the doctor came over to me and she said,

Tada je naišla doktorka i rekla mi je:

"Janine, the operation was a success,

„Dženin, operacija je uspela,

and we've picked as much bone out of your spinal cord as we could.

izvadili smo iz kičmene moždine sve koščice koje smo mogli,

But the damage is permanent.

ali oštećenje je trajno.

The central nervous system nerves -- there is no cure.

Nema leka za centralni nervni sistem.

You're what we call a partial paraplegic,

Vi ste delimično paraplegični,

and you'll have all of the injuries that go along with that.

imaćete sva oštećenja koja idu uz to.

You'll have no feeling from the waist down,

Nemate osećaj od struka nadole, i u najboljem slučaju,

and at most, you might get 10 or 20 percent return.

možda ćete se povratiti od 10 do 20 posto.

You'll have internal injuries for the rest of your life.

Imate unutrašnje povrede za ceo život.

You'll have to use a catheter for the rest of your life.

Morate koristiti kateter do kraja života.

And if you walk again, it will be with calipers and a walking frame."

Ako i prohodate, biće to samo uz pomoć hodalice.“

And then she said,

Zatim je rekla: „Dženin, moraćete dobro razmisliti o svom životu

"Janine, you'll have to rethink everything you do in your life,

jer više nikad nećete moći raditi ono što ste radili pre.“

because you're never going to be able to do the things you did before."

(Gasps)

Trudila sam se da shvatim šta mi govori.

I tried to grasp what she was saying.

I was an athlete. That's all I knew. That's all I'd done.

Bila sam sportista. To je sve što znam da radim.

Šta bih mogla drugo, ako ne to?

If I couldn't do that, then what could I do?

And the question I asked myself is:

Postavila sam sebi pitanje

If I couldn't do that,

ko sam ja, ako to više ne mogu da radim?

then who was I?

They moved me from intensive care to acute spinal.

Prebacili su me sa intenzivne nege na akutnu negu kičmenog stuba.

I was lying on a thin, hard spinal bed.

Ležala sam na tankom, tvrdom krevetu.

I had no movement in my legs.

Nisam pokretala noge.

I had tight stockings on to protect from blood clots.

Nosila sam tesne čarape da me štite od krvnih ugrušaka.

I had one arm in plaster, one arm tied down by drips.

Jedna ruka mi je bila u gipsu a druga vezana za tečnost.

I had a neck brace and sandbags on either side of my head

Imala sam fiksiran vrat i tegove sa obe strane glave,

and I saw my world through a mirror

a svet sam gledala pomoću ogledala

that was suspended above my head.

postavljenog iznad moje glave.

I shared the ward with five other people,

Bilo nas je šest na odeljenju,

and the amazing thing is,

i bilo je čudno jer smo svi ležali paralizovani na odeljenju za kičmu

because we were all lying paralyzed in a spinal ward,

we didn't know what each other looked like.

i nismo znali ko kako izgleda.

How amazing is that?

Koliko je to zapanjajuće!

How often in life do you get to make friendships, judgment-free,

Koliko često se u životu desi

da se sprijateljite bez procene,

purely based on spirit?

samo na osnovu duha?

Nije bilo površnih razgovora

And there were no superficial conversations

as we shared our innermost thoughts, our fears,

dok smo razmenjivali najdublje misli, strahove,

and our hopes for life after the spinal ward.

nade u život po izlasku sa odeljenja.

I remember one night, one of the nurses came in, Jonathan,

Sećam se da je jedne noći ušao jedan od bolničara, Džonatan,

with a whole lot of plastic straws.

sa gomilom plastičnih slamčica.

He put a pile on top of each of us, and he said,

Spustio je hrpu na svakog od nas, i rekao:

"Start threading them together."

„Spojite ih sve zajedno.“

Well, there wasn't much else to do in the spinal ward, so we did.

Nije imalo bog zna šta da se radi na odeljenju, pa smo to i učinili.

(Laughter)

And when we'd finished, he went around silently

Kad smo završili, on nas je tiho obišao

and he joined all of the straws up till it looped around the whole ward.

i povezao sve slamčice,

koje su obuhvatile celo odeljenje,

And then he said,

i rekao je: „Uhvatite se svi za svoje slamčice.“

"OK everybody, hold on to your straws."

And we did. And he said, "Right ...

Učinili smo to. A on je rekao: „Tako je. Sad smo svi povezani.“

Now we're all connected."

And as we held on and we breathed as one,

Nastavili smo tako, disali smo kao jedan,

i znali smo da nismo sami na ovom putu.

we knew we weren't on this journey alone.

And even lying paralyzed in the spinal ward ...

Bez obzira što smo ležali paralizovani na odeljenju za povrede kičme,

bilo je neverovatno dubokih i bogatih momenata,

there were moments of incredible depth and richness,

of authenticity and connection

autentičnosti i povezanosti,

that I had never experienced before.

što nisam nikada pre iskusila.

And each of us knew that when we left the spinal ward,

Svako od nas je znao, kada napustimo odeljenje,

we would never be the same.

nikad više nećemo biti ono što smo bili.

After six months, it was time to go home.

Posle šest meseci bilo je vreme da se ide kući.

I remember Dad pushing me outside in my wheelchair,

Sećam se da mi je tata gurao kolica,

wrapped in a plaster body cast,

a ja sam bila uvijena u gips,

and feeling the sun on my face for the first time.

i osetila sam sunce na licu, prvi put.

I soaked it up and I thought,

Upijala sam ga i pomislila:

"How could I ever have taken this for granted?"

„Kako sam ovo uopšte mogla da potcenim?“

I felt so incredibly grateful for my life.

Bila sam neverovatno zahvalna za svoj život.

But before I left hospital,

Pre nego što sam napustila bolnicu, glavna sestra je rekla:

the head nurse had said to me, "Janine, I want you to be ready,

„Dženin, budi spremna,

because when you get home, something's going to happen."

jer kad stigneš kući, nešto će se desiti.“

And I said, "What?"

„Šta?“ - upitala sam.

And she said, "You're going to get depressed."

„Postaćeš depresivna“- rekla je.

And I said, "Not me, not Janine the Machine,"

A ja sam rekla: „Ne. Neće Dženin Mašina",

which was my nickname.

to mi je bio nadimak.

She said, "You are, because, see, it happens to everyone.

Rekla je: „Hoćeš. To se dešava svima.

In the spinal ward, that's normal. You're in a wheelchair. That's normal.

Na ovom odeljenju, to je normalno.

U kolicima si. To je normalno.

But you're going to get home and realize how different life is."

Ali stići ćeš kući i shvatićeš

koliko je život drugačiji.“

And I got home.

Stigla sam kući i nešto se desilo.

And something happened.

I realized Sister Sam was right.

Shvatila sam da je sestra Sem bila u pravu.

I did get depressed.

Zaista sam postala depresivna.

I was in my wheelchair.

Bila sam u kolicima, nisam imala osećaj od struka naniže,

I had no feeling from the waist down,

attached to a catheter bottle.

imala sam kateter, nisam mogla da hodam.

I couldn't walk.

Toliko sam oslabila u bolnici

I'd lost so much weight in hospital,

I now weighed about 80 pounds.

da sam sad jedva imala oko trideset pet kilograma.

And I wanted to give up.

Htela sam da odustanem.

All I wanted to do was put my running shoes on and run out the door.

Jedino što sam želela je da obujem patike i istrčim na vrata.

I wanted my old life back. I wanted my body back.

Želela sam nazad svoj život, svoje telo.

And I can remember Mom sitting on the end of my bed

Sećam se da je mama sedela na krevetu i rekla:

and saying, "I wonder if life will ever be good again."

„Pitam se da li će život ikada više biti dobar.“

And I thought, "How could it?

Pomislila sam: „Kako bi mogao biti?

Because I've lost everything that I valued,

Izgubila sam sve što sam cenila i čemu sam težila.

everything that I'd worked towards.

Gone."

Sve je otišlo.“

And the question I asked was, "Why me? Why me?"

Pitala sam se: „Zašto meni? Zašto se to meni desilo?“

And then I remembered

A onda sam se setila svojih prijatelja

my friends that were still in the spinal ward,

koji su još uvek ležali na odeljenju za povrede kičme,

particularly Maria.

naročito Marije.

Doživela je saobraćajnu nesreću,

Maria was in a car accident,

and she woke up on her 16th birthday

probudila se na svoj 16. rođendan saznavši da je kvadriplegičar,

to the news that she was a complete quadriplegic,

had no movement from the neck down,

nepokretna od vrata naniže,

had damage to her vocal chords, and she couldn't talk.

sa povređenim glasnim žicama, nije mogla da govori.

Rekli su da će me premestiti pored nje,

They told me, "We're going to move you next to her

jer bi to bilo dobro za nju.

because we think it will be good for her."

I was worried. I didn't know how I'd react to being next to her.

Zabrinula sam se.

Nisam znala kako ću reagovati na to da sam pored nje.

I knew it would be challenging, but it was actually a blessing,

Znala sam da će to biti izazov, a u stvari, bio je to blagoslov,

because Maria always smiled.

jer je Marija uvek bila nasmejana.

She was always happy, and even when she began to talk again,

Uvek je bila srećna, a kad je ponovo progovorila,

albeit difficult to understand, she never complained, not once.

iako se teško razumelo, nikad se nije žalila, nijednom.

And I wondered how had she ever found that level of acceptance.

Pitala sam se kako je mogla sve to tako prihvatiti.

And I realized that this wasn't just my life;

Tada sam shvatila da to nije samo moj život.

it was life itself.

To je sam život.

I realized that this wasn't just my pain; it was everybody's pain.

Shvatila sam da to nije bio samo moj bol. Bio je to svačiji bol.

And then I knew, just like before,

Tada sam shvatila, kao i ranije, da imam izbor.

that I had a choice: I could keep fighting this,

Mogu da nastavim da se borim sa ovim,

or I could let go and accept not only my body,

ili da pustim i prihvatim ne samo svoje telo

but the circumstances of my life.

nego i okolnosti mog života.

And then I stopped asking, "Why me?"

Tada sam prestala sa pitanjem „Zašto ja?“

And I started to ask, "Why not me?"

Počela sam da se pitam „A zašto ne ja?“

Onda sam pomislila da je biti na dnu

And then I thought to myself,

maybe being at rock bottom is actually the perfect place to start.

savršeno mesto odakle se počinje.

I had never before thought of myself as a creative person.

Nikada pre nisam sebe smatrala kreativnom osobom.

I was an athlete; my body was a machine.

Bila sam sportista. Moje telo je bilo mašina.

But now I was about to embark on the most creative project

Sad sam bila nadomak upuštanja

u najkreativniji mogući projekat:

that any of us could ever do:

that of rebuilding a life.

obnavljanja života.

And even though I had absolutely no idea what I was going to do,

Iako nisam imala pojma šta ću uraditi,

in that uncertainty came a sense of freedom.

u toj neizvesnosti se naslućivala sloboda.

I was no longer tied to a set path.

Nisam više bila vezana za predodređen put.

I was free to explore life's infinite possibilities.

Bila sam slobodna da istražujem beskrajne mogućnosti života.

And that realization was about to change my life.

To saznanje će mi uskoro promeniti život.

Sitting at home in my wheelchair and my plaster body cast,

Dok sam sedela kod kuće u kolicima, u gipsu,

an airplane flew overhead.

proleteo je avion iznad mene, pogledala sam gore, i pomislila:

I looked up, and I thought to myself, "That's it!

„To je to! Ako već ne mogu da hodam, mogla bih da letim.“

If I can't walk, then I might as well fly."

(Laughter)

I said, "Mom, I'm going to learn how to fly."

Rekla sam mami da ću naučiti da letim.

She said, "That's nice, dear."

„Baš lepo, dušo.“ - rekla je.

(Laughter)

I said, "Pass me the yellow pages."

Zamolila sam je da mi doda imenik.

She passed me the phone book, I rang up the flying school,

Nazvala sam školu letenja,

rezervisala sam mesto za let.

I said I'd like to make a booking to come out for a flight.

Pitali su me kada bih došla.

They said, "When do you want to come out?"

I said, "Well, I have to get a friend to drive me because I can't drive.

„Imam prijatelja koji će me dovesti, jer ja ne mogu da vozim.

U stvari, ne mogu ni da hodam.

Sort of can't walk, either. Is that a problem?"

Da li je to problem?“

I made a booking, and weeks later,

Potvrdila sam mesto, a moj prijatelj Kris

my friend Chris and my mom drove me out to the airport,

i mama povezli su me na aerodrom,

mojih 35 kilograma uvijenih u gips,

all 80 pounds of me covered in a plaster body cast

in a baggy pair of overalls.

u vrećastom kombinezonu. (Smeh)

(Laughter)

I can tell you, I did not look like the ideal candidate

Nisam izgledala kao idealni kandidat

koji će dobiti pilotsku dozvolu. (Smeh)

to get a pilot's license.

(Laughter)

Držim se za pult jer ne mogu da stojim.

I'm holding on to the counter because I can't stand.

I said, "Hi, I'm here for a flying lesson."

„Zdravo. Došla sam na čas letenja.“

They took one look and ran out the back to draw short straws.

Pogledali su se i izašli da vuku slamčice.

"You get her." "No, no, you take her."

„Tvoja je.“ „Ne, ne, ti je preuzmi.“

Finally a guy goes, "Hi, I'm Andrew. I'm going to take you flying."

Konačno izlazi neki momak.

„Ćao, ja sam Endru, vodiću te na letenje.“

I go, "Great!"

„Divno.“ - rekla sam.

They get me out on the tarmac,

Povezli su me, izveli na stazu

and there was this red, white and blue airplane -- it was beautiful.

do crveno-belo-plavog aviona.

Bio je divan. Podigli su me u kabinu.

They had to slide me up on the wing to put me in the cockpit.

Prvo su me spustili na krilo, zatim u kabinu.

They sat me down. There are buttons and dials everywhere.

Postavili su me da sednem. Svuda dugmad i brojčanici.

I'm going, "Wow, how do you ever know what all these buttons and dials do?"

„Au, kako uopšte znate čemu svi ovi dugmići služe?“

Endru, instruktor, seo je napred i uzleteo.

Andrew got in the front, started the plane, and said,

"Would you like to have a go at taxiing?"

Upitao je: „Hoćeš li da probaš taksiranje?“

That's when you use your feet to control the rudder pedals

To je kada pomoću stopala kontrolišete pedale kormila

da biste upravljali avionom na zemlji.

to control the airplane on the ground.

Rekla sam: „Ne, ne mogu da koristim noge.“

I said, "No, I can't use my legs."

He went, "Oh."

Uzdahnuo je.

I said, "But I can use my hands," and he said, "OK."

„Ali koristim ruke.“ „U redu.“ - rekao je.

So he got over to the runway, and he applied the power.

Prešao je na pistu i dao gas.

And as we took off down the runway,

Dok smo uzletali sa piste,

and the wheels lifted up off the tarmac, and we became airborne,

točkovi su se podigli, nalazili smo se u vazduhu,

I had the most incredible sense of freedom.

a ja sam imala neverovatan osećaj slobode.

And Andrew said to me,

Dok smo bili iznad prostora za trening, Endru mi se obratio:

as we got over the training area,

"You see that mountain over there?"

„Vidiš onu planinu tamo?“

And I said, "Yeah."

„Da.“ - rekla sam.

„Onda preuzmi kontrolu i leti prema toj planini.“

And he said, "Well, you take the controls, and you fly towards that mountain."

And as I looked up, I realized

Kad sam pogledala, shvatila sam

da je pokazao na Modre planine

that he was pointing towards the Blue Mountains,

where the journey had begun.

gde je počelo putovanje.

And I took the controls,

Preuzela sam komandu i letela sam.

and I was flying.

And I was a long, long way from that spinal ward.

Bila sam daleko, daleko od odeljenja za povrede kičme,

I knew right then that I was going to be a pilot.

i upravo tad sam shvatila da ću biti pilot.

Didn't know how on Earth I'd ever pass a medical.

Nisam imala pojma kako ću dobiti lekarsko uverenje.

(Laughter)

But I'd worry about that later, because right now, I had a dream.

No, o tome ću razmišljati kasnije, jer sad imam san.

Otišla sam kući, uzela dnevnik obuke i imala sam plan.

So I went home, I got a training diary out, and I had a plan.

And I practiced my walking as much as I could,

Vežbala sam hodanje koliko god sam mogla.

U početku me je držalo dvoje,

and I went from the point of two people holding me up ...

to one person holding me up ...

zatim samo jedna osoba,

to the point where I could walk around the furniture

dok nisam mogla sama da se krećem oko nameštaja

as long as it wasn't too far apart.

ako nije previše udaljen.

And then I made great progression,

Tako sam dosta napredovala,

to the point where I could walk around the house,

pa sam vremenom mogla da idem oko kuće, držeći se za zidove, ovako,

holding onto the walls, like this.

And Mom said she was forever following me,

a mama me je pratila u stopu

wiping off my fingerprints.

i brisala moje otiske prstiju. (Smeh)

(Laughter)

But at least she always knew where I was.

Bar je uvek znala gde se nalazim.

(Laughter)

Dok su lekari nastavili sa operacijama

So while the doctors continued to operate

and put my body back together again,

da bi mi ponovo sastavili telo,

I went on with my theory study.

ja sam učila teoriju,

And then eventually, amazingly, I passed my pilot's medical,

i konačno, neverovatno, dobila sam lekarsko uverenje za pilota,

and that was my green light to fly.

to mi je dalo zeleno svetlo za letenje.

And I spent every moment I could out at that flying school,

Svaki trenutak sam provodila u školi za letenje,

way out of my comfort zone,

daleko od svoje zone komfora,

all these young guys that wanted to be Qantas pilots, you know,

svi ti momci koji su hteli da budu piloti Kvantasa,

and little old hop-along me in first my plaster cast,

i ja, malo skakutalo u gipsu,

and then my steel brace, my baggy overalls,

pa u čeličnom stezniku, u vrećastom kombinezonu,

my bag of medication and catheters and my limp.

sa torbicom lekova, kateterima, ćopava,

They use to look at me and think,

svi su me gledali i mislili:

„Ma koga ona to zeza? Nikad neće uspeti.“

"Oh, who is she kidding? She's never going to be able to do this."

Ponekad sam i ja pomislila isto.

And sometimes I thought that, too.

Ipak, to nije bilo važno, jer je nešto iznutra plamtelo,

But that didn't matter,

because now there was something inside that burned

that far outweighed my injuries.

i nadjačalo moje povrede.

And little goals kept me going along the way,

Mali ciljevi su me održavali

i na kraju sam dobila svoju pilotsku dozvolu.

and eventually I got my private pilot's license.

Then I learned to navigate, and I flew my friends around Australia.

Posle sam naučila navigaciju i letela sam sa prijateljima iznad Australije.

And then I learned to fly an airplane with two engines

Zatim sam naučila da upravljam avionom sa dva motora,

and I got my twin-engine rating.

i za to sam dobila dozvolu.

And then I learned to fly in bad weather as well as fine weather,

Posle sam naučila kako se leti po lošem kao i po lepom vremenu,

and got my instrument rating.

dobila sam ocenu i za instrumente.

And then I got my commercial pilot's license.

Zatim sam dobila dozvolu za komercijalnog pilota.

And then I got my instructor rating.

Zatim dozvolu za instruktora.

And then I found myself back at that same school

Tako sam se našla u istoj školi

where I'd gone for that very first flight,

u kojoj sam prvi put poletela,

teaching other people how to fly ...

učeći druge da lete,

just under 18 months after I'd left the spinal ward.

i to posle manje od 18 meseci od napuštanja odeljenja za povrede kičme.

(Aplauz)

(Applause)

(Applause ends)

And then I thought, "Why stop there?

Onda sam pomislila: „A zašto da stanem tu?

Why not learn to fly upside down?"

Zašto da ne naučim da letim naopačke?“

(Laughter)

Naučila sam i to,

And I did, and I learned to fly upside down

and became an aerobatics flying instructor.

postala sam instruktor akrobatskog letenja.

(Laughter)

A mama i tata? Nikad nisu bili gore.

And Mom and Dad? Never been up.

(Laughter)

But then I knew for certain that although my body might be limited,

Uverila sam se da je, uprkos ograničenju tela,

it was my spirit that was unstoppable.

moj duh bio nezaustavljiv.

The philosopher Lao Tzu once said,

Filozof Lao Ce je jednom rekao:

„Kada pustite ono što jeste,

"When you let go of what you are,

postaćete ono što biste mogli biti."

you become what you might be."

I now know that it wasn't until I let go of who I thought I was

Sada znam da tek kada sam odbacila ono što sam mislila da jesam,

that I was able to create a completely new life.

mogla sam da stvorim potpuno nov život.

It wasn't until I let go of the life I thought I should have ...

Tek kad sam se oslobodila života koji sam mislila da treba da imam,

mogla sam da prigrlim život koji me je čekao.

that I was able to embrace the life that was waiting for me.

I now know that my real strength

Sada znam da moja prava snaga

never came from my body.

nikada nije dolazila iz tela,

And although my physical capabilities have changed dramatically,

i iako su se moje fizičke sposobnosti drastično promenile,

who I am is unchanged.

moja ličnost je ostala ista.

The pilot light inside of me was still alight,

Vatra pilota u meni je ipak vatra,

just as it is in each and every one of us.

koja postoji u svima nama.

I know that I'm not my body.

Ja znam da nisam svoje telo,

And I also know that you're not yours.

a znam i da vi niste vaše.

I onda više nije važno kako izgledate,

And then it no longer matters what you look like,

where you come from, or what you do for a living.

odakle ste, ili od čega živite.

All that matters is that we continue to fan the flame of humanity

Bitno je da nastavljamo da raspirujemo plamen ljudskosti,

by living our lives as the ultimate creative expression

živeći život kao krajnji kreativni izraz

of who we really are,

onoga što zaista jesmo,

because we are all connected

jer smo svi povezani

by millions and millions of straws.

milionima i milionima slamčica,

And it's time to join those up

i vreme je da ih sastavimo

and to hang on.

i da ih se držimo.

And if we are to move towards our collective bliss ...

I ako ćemo se okrenuti ka zajedničkoj sreći,

it's time we shed our focus on the physical

vreme je da se preusmerimo sa fizičkog,

and instead embrace the virtues of the heart.

i umesto toga prigrlimo vrline srca.

So raise your straws if you'll join me.

Podignite slamčice ako ćete mi se pridružiti.

(Applause)

Hvala. (Aplauz)

Thank you.

(Applause)

Thank you.

Hvala.

(Applause)