What's so funny about mental illness? | Ruby Wax

795,164 views ・ 2012-10-10

TED


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Translator: Joseph Geni Reviewer: Morton Bast
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One in four people suffer from some sort of mental illness,
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so if it was one, two, three, four, it's you, sir.
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You. Yeah. (Laughter)
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With the weird teeth. And you next to him. (Laughter)
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You know who you are.
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Actually, that whole row isn't right. (Laughter)
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That's not good. Hi. Yeah. Real bad. Don't even look at me. (Laughter)
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I am one of the one in four. Thank you.
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I think I inherit it from my mother, who,
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used to crawl around the house on all fours.
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She had two sponges in her hand, and then she had two
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tied to her knees. My mother was completely absorbent. (Laughter)
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And she would crawl around behind me going,
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"Who brings footprints into a building?!"
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So that was kind of a clue that things weren't right.
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So before I start, I would like to thank
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the makers of Lamotrigine, Sertraline, and Reboxetine,
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because without those few simple chemicals, I would not be vertical today.
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So how did it start?
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My mental illness -- well, I'm not even going to talk about my mental illness.
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What am I going to talk about? Okay.
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I always dreamt that, when I had my final breakdown,
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it would be because I had a deep Kafkaesque
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existentialist revelation,
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or that maybe Cate Blanchett would play me and she would win an Oscar for it. (Laughter)
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But that's not what happened. I had my breakdown
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during my daughter's sports day.
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There were all the parents sitting in a parking lot
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eating food out of the back of their car -- only the English --
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eating their sausages. They loved their sausages. (Laughter)
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Lord and Lady Rigor Mortis were nibbling on the tarmac,
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and then the gun went off and all the girlies started running,
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and all the mummies went, "Run! Run Chlamydia! Run!" (Laughter)
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"Run like the wind, Veruca! Run!"
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And all the girlies, girlies running, running, running,
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everybody except for my daughter, who was just standing
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at the starting line, just waving,
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because she didn't know she was supposed to run.
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So I took to my bed for about a month, and when I woke up
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I found I was institutionalized, and when I saw the other inmates,
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I realized that I had found my people, my tribe. (Laughter)
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Because they became my only friends, they became my friends,
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because very few people that I knew -- Well, I wasn't
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sent a lot of cards or flowers. I mean, if I had had a broken leg
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or I was with child I would have been inundated,
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but all I got was a couple phone calls telling me to perk up.
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Perk up.
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Because I didn't think of that. (Laughter)
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(Laughter) (Applause)
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Because, you know, the one thing, one thing that you get with this disease,
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this one comes with a package, is you get a real sense of shame,
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because your friends go, "Oh come on, show me the lump,
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show me the x-rays," and of course you've got nothing to show,
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so you're, like, really disgusted with yourself because you're thinking,
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"I'm not being carpet-bombed. I don't live in a township."
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So you start to hear these abusive voices, but you don't hear one abusive voice,
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you hear about a thousand -- 100,000 abusive voices,
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like if the Devil had Tourette's, that's what it would sound like.
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But we all know in here, you know, there is no Devil,
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there are no voices in your head.
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You know that when you have those abusive voices,
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all those little neurons get together and in that little gap
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you get a real toxic "I want to kill myself" kind of chemical,
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and if you have that over and over again on a loop tape,
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you might have yourself depression.
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Oh, and that's not even the tip of the iceberg.
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If you get a little baby, and you abuse it verbally,
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its little brain sends out chemicals that are so destructive
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that the little part of its brain that can tell good from bad just doesn't grow,
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so you might have yourself a homegrown psychotic.
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If a soldier sees his friend blown up, his brain goes into
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such high alarm that he can't actually put the experience into words,
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so he just feels the horror over and over again.
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So here's my question. My question is, how come
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when people have mental damage, it's always an active imagination?
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How come every other organ in your body can get sick
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and you get sympathy, except the brain?
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I'd like to talk a little bit more about the brain,
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because I know you like that here at TED,
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so if you just give me a minute here, okay.
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Okay, let me just say, there's some good news.
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There is some good news. First of all, let me say,
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we've come a long, long way.
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We started off as a teeny, teeny little one-celled amoeba,
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tiny, just sticking onto a rock, and now, voila, the brain.
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Here we go. (Laughter)
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This little baby has a lot of horsepower.
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It comes completely conscious. It's got state-of-the-art lobes.
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We've got the occipital lobe so we can actually see the world.
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We got the temporal lobe so we can actually hear the world.
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Here we've got a little bit of long-term memory,
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so, you know that night you want to forget, when you got really drunk? Bye-bye! Gone. (Laughter)
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So actually, it's filled with 100 billion neurons
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just zizzing away, electrically transmitting information,
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zizzing, zizzing. I'm going to give you a little side view here.
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I don't know if you can get that here. (Laughter)
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So, zizzing away, and so — (Laughter) —
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And for every one — I know, I drew this myself. Thank you.
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For every one single neuron, you can actually have
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from 10,000 to 100,000 different connections
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or dendrites or whatever you want to call it, and every time
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you learn something, or you have an experience,
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that bush grows, you know, that bush of information.
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Can you imagine, every human being is carrying
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that equipment, even Paris Hilton? (Laughter)
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Go figure.
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But I got a little bad news for you folks. I got some bad news.
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This isn't for the one in four. This is for the four in four.
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We are not equipped for the 21st century.
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Evolution did not prepare us for this. We just don't have the bandwidth,
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and for people who say, oh, they're having a nice day,
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they're perfectly fine, they're more insane than the rest of us.
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Because I'll show you where there might be a few glitches
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in evolution. Okay, let me just explain this to you.
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When we were ancient man — (Laughter) —
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millions of years ago, and we suddenly felt threatened
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by a predator, okay? — (Laughter) —
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we would — Thank you. I drew these myself. (Laughter)
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Thank you very much. Thank you. Thank you. (Applause)
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Thank you. Anyway, we would fill up with our own adrenaline
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and our own cortisol, and then we'd kill or be killed,
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we'd eat or we'd be eaten, and then suddenly we'd de-fuel,
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and we'd go back to normal. Okay.
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So the problem is, nowadays, with modern man— (Laughter) —
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when we feel in danger, we still fill up with our own chemical
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but because we can't kill traffic wardens — (Laughter) —
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or eat estate agents, the fuel just stays in our body
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over and over, so we're in a constant state of alarm,
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a constant state. And here's another thing that happened.
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About 150,000 years ago, when language came online,
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we started to put words to this constant emergency,
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so it wasn't just, "Oh my God, there's a saber-toothed tiger,"
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which could be, it was suddenly, "Oh my God, I didn't send the email. Oh my God, my thighs are too fat.
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Oh my God, everybody can see I'm stupid. I didn't get invited to the Christmas party!"
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So you've got this nagging loop tape that goes
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over and over again that drives you insane, so,
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you see what the problem is? What once made you safe
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now drives you insane.
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I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but somebody has to be.
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Your pets are happier than you are. (Laughter)
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(Applause)
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So kitty cat, meow, happy happy happy, human beings, screwed. (Laughter)
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Completely and utterly -- so, screwed.
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But my point is, if we don't talk about this stuff,
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and we don't learn how to deal with our lives, it's not going
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to be one in four. It's going to be four in four
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who are really, really going to get ill in the upstairs department.
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And while we're at it, can we please stop the stigma?
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Thank you. (Applause)
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(Applause) Thank you.
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