Why you should make useless things | Simone Giertz

Translator: Tímea Somogyi Reviewer: Zuzana Šplhová

Hello.

Zdravím!

My name is Simone.

Volám sa Simone.

You know how people tell you if you get nervous when onstage,

Viete, ako sa hovorí, že ak máte strach z vystupovania,

picture people in the audience naked?

predstavte si ľudí v publiku nahých?

Like it's this thing that's supposed to make you feel better.

To by nám malo pomôcť uvoľniť sa.

But I was thinking --

V roku 2018 mi však táto metóda pripadá nielen čudná, ale aj nevhodná.

picturing all of you naked in 2018 feels kind of weird and wrong.

Like, we're working really hard on moving past stuff like that,

Veď bojujeme za to, aby tieto veci patrili do minulosti.

so we need a new method of dealing with

Práve preto potrebujeme nové spôsoby, ako trému prekonať.

if you get nervous onstage.

And I realized that what I'd really like

A uvedomila som si, že sa na vás chcem pozerať tak,

is that I can look at you as much as you're looking at me --

ako sa vy pozeráte na mňa.

just to even things out a little bit.

Aby bola situácia vyváženejšia.

So if I had way more eyeballs,

Čiže keby som mala viac očí,

then we'd all be really comfortable, right?

tak by sme sa všetci cítili oveľa pohodlnejšie, že?

So in preparation for this talk, I made myself a shirt.

A tak som si na túto prezentáciu vyrobila tričko.

(Rattling)

(hrkot)

(Laughter)

(smiech)

It's googly eyes.

Sú to plastové oči.

It took me 14 hours

Trvalo mi 14 hodín,

and 227 googly eyes to make this shirt.

kým som z 227 plastových očí vyrobila toto tričko.

And being able to look at you as much as you're looking at me

A to, že sa na vás môžem dívať tak, ako sa na mňa dívate vy,

is actually only half of the reason I made this.

bol iba jeden z dôvodov, prečo som ho vyrobila.

The other half is being able to do this.

Druhým dôvodom bolo toto.

(Googly eyes rattle)

(plastové oči hrkocú)

(Laughter)

(smiech)

So I do a lot of things like this.

Vyrábam veľa takýchto vecí.

I see a problem and I invent some sort of solution to it.

Keď narazím na nejaký problém, snažím sa naň nájsť riešenie.

For example, brushing your teeth.

Ako napríklad pri umývaní zubov.

Like, it's this thing we all have to do, it's kind of boring,

Musíme to robiť všetci, je to dosť nudné, nikoho to príliš nebaví.

and nobody really likes it.

If there were any seven-year-olds in the audience,

Keby som tu mala sedemročných divákov, určite by súhlasili.

they'd be like, "Yes!"

So what about if you had a machine that could do it for you?

Tak čo keby existoval prístroj, ktorý by vám zuby umyl?

(Laughter)

(smiech)

I call it ...

Stroj som nazvala...

I call it "The Toothbrush Helmet."

Stroj som nazvala „prilba na umývanie zubov“.

(Laughter)

(smiech)

(Robot arm buzzing)

(bzukot)

(Laughter)

(smiech)

(Applause)

(potlesk)

Z desiatich zubárov neodporúča túto prilbu ani jeden.

So my toothbrush helmet is recommended by zero out of 10 dentists,

and it definitely did not revolutionize the world of dentistry,

A hoci nespôsobila stomatologickú revolúciu,

but it did completely change my life.

táto prilba mi úplne zmenila život.

Because I finished making this toothbrush helmet three years ago

Keď som ju pred troma rokmi dokončila, prešla som do obývačky, zapla kameru

and after I finished making it,

I went into my living room and I put up a camera,

and I filmed a seven-second clip of it working.

a nahrala som s ňou 7-sekundové video.

And by now,

A môj život sa zmenil na typickú modernú rozprávku.

this is a pretty standard modern-day fairy tale

of girl posting on the internet,

Dievča zavesí niečo na internet,

the internet takes the girl by storm,

stane sa hviezdou

thousands of men voyage into the comment sections

a tisícky mužov sa v sekcii komentárov uchádzajú o jej ruku.

to ask for her hand in marriage --

(Laughter)

Ona im však dá košom a vytvorí si kanál na YouTube

She ignores all of them, starts a YouTube channel

and keeps on building robots.

a pokračuje v budovaní robotov.

Since then, I've carved out this little niche for myself on the internet

Odvtedy som sa na internete preslávila ako vynálezkyňa zbytočných strojov,

as an inventor of useless machines,

because as we all know,

lebo všetci vieme,

the easiest way to be at the top of your field

že najľahší spôsob, ako sa stať špičkou vo svojom odbore je,

is to choose a very small field.

že si vyberieme veľmi malý odbor.

(Laughter)

(smiech)

(Applause)

(potlesk)

So I run a YouTube channel about my machines,

Takže mám kanál na YouTube venovaný mojim vynálezom.

and I've done things like cutting hair with drones --

Vyrobila som napríklad dron na strihanie vlasov.

(Drone buzzes)

(dron bzučí)

(Laughter)

(smiech)

(Drone crashes)

(Laughter)

(Drone buzzes)

(dron bzučí)

(Laughter)

(smiech)

(Applause)

(potlesk)

To a machine that helps me wake up in the morning --

Alebo stroj, ktorý ma ráno zobúdza.

(Alarm)

(zvuk budíka)

(Laughter)

(smiech)

(Video) Simone: Ow!

(video) Simone: Aúú!

To this machine that helps me chop vegetables.

Alebo prístroj na krájanie zeleniny.

(Knives chop)

I'm not an engineer.

Nie som inžinierka a neštudovala som inžinierstvo.

I did not study engineering in school.

But I was a super ambitious student growing up.

Ale vždy som bola veľmi ambicióznou študentkou.

In middle school and high school, I had straight A's,

Na strednej som mala samé jednotky a zmaturovala som ako najlepšia v ročníku.

and I graduated at the top of my year.

On the flip side of that,

No na druhej strane som vždy bojovala s nezdravým perfekcionizmom.

I struggled with very severe performance anxiety.

Here's an email I sent to my brother around that time.

Ukážem vám mail, ktorý som v tom čase poslala bratovi.

"You won't understand how difficult it is for me to tell you,

„Nevieš si ani predstaviť, ako ťažko sa mi o tom hovorí.

to confess this.

I'm so freaking embarrassed.

Cítim sa strašne trápne.

I don't want people to think that I'm stupid.

Nechcem, aby si o mne mysleli, že som hlúpa.

Now I'm starting to cry too.

A teraz už aj plačem.

Damn."

Dokelu.“

And no, I did not accidentally burn our parents' house down.

A nie, nepodpálila som dom našich rodičov.

The thing I'm writing about in the email and the thing I'm so upset about

Vec, na ktorú narážam a ktorá ma tak vyviedla z miery je,

že som za písomku z matiky dostala dvojku.

is that I got a B on a math test.

So something obviously happened between here and here.

Takže niečo sa medzi týmito bodmi muselo stať.

(Laughter)

(smiech)

[TU SA NIEČO STALO]

One of those things was puberty.

Sčasti to bola puberta.

(Laughter)

(smiech)

Beautiful time indeed.

Najkrajšie obdobie života.

But moreover,

Okrem toho som sa začala zaujímať o výrobu robotov

I got interested in building robots,

and I wanted to teach myself about hardware.

a chcela som sa naučiť čo najviac o hardvére.

But building things with hardware, especially if you're teaching yourself,

Ale práca s hardvérom, hlavne, ak ste samouk,

je mimoriadne náročná.

is something that's really difficult to do.

It has a high likelihood of failure

Pravdepodobnosť neúspechu je vysoká, ako aj šanca toho, že sa znemožním.

and moreover,

it has a high likelihood of making you feel stupid.

And that was my biggest fear at the time.

A toho som sa vtedy bála najviac.

So I came up with a setup that would guarantee success 100 percent of the time.

A tak som vymyslela systém, ktorý zaručoval stopercentný úspech

With my setup, it would be nearly impossible to fail.

a ktorý garantoval, že nezlyhám.

And that was that instead of trying to succeed,

Spočíval v tom, že namiesto praktických vecičiek

I was going to try to build things that would fail.

som začala vyrábať také, ktoré nikdy nemali fungovať.

And even though I didn't realize it at the time,

A hoci som si to ešte vtedy neuvedomila, výroba hlúpych predmetov bol skvelý nápad,

building stupid things was actually quite smart,

because as I kept on learning about hardware,

lebo ako som sa učila pracovať s hardvérom,

for the first time in my life,

po prvý raz v živote ma neubíjal strach zo zlyhania.

I did not have to deal with my performance anxiety.

And as soon as I removed all pressure and expectations from myself,

Len čo som sa zbavila vysokých nárokov, ktoré som na seba predtým kládla,

that pressure quickly got replaced by enthusiasm,

opadol zo mňa stres a nahradilo ho nadšenie.

and it allowed me to just play.

A opäť som sa mohla hrať.

So as an inventor,

Ako vynálezcu ma zaujímajú veci, s ktorými mávajú ľudia ťažkosti,

I'm interested in things that people struggle with.

It can be small things or big things or medium-sized things

či sú to drobnosti, veľké či stredne veľké problémy.

and something like giving a TED talk presents this whole new set of problems

No a vystupovanie na TED konferencii

prináša so sebou celý rad problémov, ktoré si vyžadujú riešenia.

that I can solve.

And identifying a problem is the first step in my process

Skôr, než niečo vyrobím, musím identifikovať problém.

of building a useless machine.

So before I came here,

Predtým, ako som sem prišla, som rozmýšľala nad problémami,

I sat down and I thought of some of the potential problems I might have

ktoré by sa mohli počas prezentácie vyskytnúť.

in giving this talk.

Forgetting what to say.

Zabudnem, čo chcem povedať.

That people won't laugh --

Ľudia sa nebudú smiať – to ste vy.

that's you.

Alebo, čo by bolo ešte horšie, budete sa smiať v nesprávnej chvíli.

Or even worse,

that you'll laugh at the wrong things --

that was an OK part to laugh at,

Teraz sa môžete pokojne smiať, ďakujem.

thank you.

(Laughter)

(smiech)

Or that when I get nervous, my hands start shaking

Keď som napätá, začnú sa mi triasť ruky, čo ma strašne znervózňuje.

and I'm really self-conscious about it.

Or that my fly has been open this entire time

Bála som sa aj toho, že po celý čas budem mať rozopnutý rázporok

a na rozdiel od vás si to nevšimnem.

and all of you noticed but I didn't,

but it's closed so we're all good on that one.

Rázporok mám zapnutý, takže toto je v poriadku.

But one thing I'm actually really nervous about is my hands shaking.

Najviac ma však znervózňujú moje trasľavé ruky.

I remember when I was a kid,

Keď som bola malá a prednášala som pred triedou,

giving presentations in school,

I would have my notes on a piece of paper,

zapísala som si poznámky na kúsok papiera a papier som si podoprela zošitom,

and I would put a notebook behind the paper

so that people wouldn't be able to see the paper quivering.

aby ostatní nevideli, ako sa mi trasie v rukách.

And I give a lot of talks.

Dnes už prednášam pravidelne.

I know that about half of you in the audience are probably like,

Polovica z vás si asi pomyslí, že výroba robotov je fajn koníček,

"Building useless machines is really fun,

ale asi to má od podnikania ďaleko, nie?

but how is this in any way or form a business?"

And giving talks is a part of it.

Prezentácie však k tomu patria.

And the arrangers always put out a glass of water for you onstage

A organizátori vám vždy prichystajú pohár vody,

so you have something to drink if you get thirsty,

aby ste sa mohli napiť, ak vysmädnete.

and I always so badly want to drink that water,

No a ja sa vždy chcem napiť, ale bojím sa zdvihnúť pohár,

but I don't dare to pick the glass up

because then people might be able to see that my hands are shaking.

lebo všetci by videli, že sa mi trasú ruky.

So what about a machine that hands you a glass of water?

No čo keby existoval stroj, ktorý vám ten pohár podá?

Sold to the nervous girl in the googly-eye shirt.

Predaný nervóznemu dievčaťu v okatom tričku!

Actually, I need to take this off because I have a thing --

Radšej si ho vyzlečiem, lebo tu niečo mám...

(Googly eyes rattle)

(plastové oči hrkocú)

Oh.

Ou!

(Clanking)

(cengot)

(Laughter)

(smiech)

I still don't know what to call this,

Zatiaľ sa mi nepodarilo pomenovať túto vec,

but I think some sort of "head orbit device,"

ale napadlo mi niečo ako „obežné zariadenie okolo hlavy“,

lebo táto plocha sa okolo vás točí a môžete si na ňu čokoľvek položiť.

because it rotates this platform around you

and you can put anything on it.

You can have a camera; you can get photos of your entire head.

Napríklad foťák, aby ste si z každého uhla mohli odfotiť hlavu.

Like it's really -- it's a very versatile machine.

Je to neobyčajne všestranná vecička.

(Laughter)

(smiech)

OK, and I have --

No a mám tu...

Ak chcete, môžete si tam dať nejaké občerstvenie.

I mean, you can put some snacks on it, for example,

if you want to.

I have some popcorn here.

Mám tu trocha pukancov.

And you just put a little bit like that.

A dáte tam len trošku.

And then you want to --

A potom...

there's some sacrifices for science --

Áno, veda si občas vyžaduje obete.

just some popcorn falling on the floor.

Pár pukancov mi spadlo na zem.

Let's do the long way around.

Urobíme si obchádzku.

(Robot buzzes)

(bzučenie robota)

(Laughter)

(smiech)

And then you have a little hand.

A má to aj takúto ručičku.

Výšku prispôsobíte jednoducho: pokrčíte plecami.

You need to adjust the height of it,

and you just do it by shrugging.

(Laughter)

(smiech)

(Applause)

(potlesk)

It has a little hand.

A teraz tá ručička.

(Hand thwacks)

(buchnutie)

(Laughter)

(smiech)

(Applause)

(potlesk)

I just bumped my mic off,

Spadol mi mikrofón, ale už by to malo byť v poriadku.

but I think we're all good.

OK, also I need to chew this popcorn,

Potrebujem dojesť tie pukance, takže by ste mi mohli ešte zatlieskať.

so if you guys could just clap your hands a little bit more --

(Applause)

(potlesk)

OK, so it's like your own little personal solar system,

Čiže akoby som mala svoju vlastnú slnečnú sústavu,

because I'm a millennial,

lebo ako mileniál chcem, aby sa všetko točilo okolo mňa.

so I want everything to revolve around me.

(smiech)

(Laughter)

Back to the glass of water, that's what we're here for.

Vráťme sa teda k tej vode, to bol náš prvotný cieľ.

So, I promise -- I mean, it still has --

A sľubujem vám, že...

it doesn't have any water in it,

V pohári nie je voda, prepáčte.

I'm sorry.

But I still need to work on this machine a little bit

Stroj si ešte vyžaduje niekoľko úprav,

because I still need to pick up the glass and put it on the platform,

lebo pohár treba položiť na plochu manuálne,

but if your hands are shaking a little bit,

ale ak sa vám trochu roztrasú ruky, nikto si to nevšimne,

nobody's going to notice

lebo máte na sebe veľmi úchvatné zariadenie.

because you're wearing a very mesmerizing piece of equipment.

Takže to by sme mali.

So, we're all good.

OK.

Dobre.

(Robot buzzes)

(robot bzučí)

(Singing)

(spev)

Oh no, it got stuck.

Ach, nie, zasekol sa!

Isn't it comforting that even robots sometimes get stage fright?

Je super vedieť, že aj roboty majú občas trému, nie?

It just gets stuck a little bit.

Trošku sa zasekol.

It's very human of them.

Je to od neho veľmi ľudské.

Oh wait, let's go back a little bit,

Vráťme sa trochu späť a teraz...

and then --

(Glass falls)

(Laughter)

(smiech)

Isn't it a beautiful time to be alive?

No proste radosť žiť.

(Laughter)

(smiech)

(Applause)

(potlesk)

So as much as my machines can seem like simple engineering slapstick,

Hoci moje prístroje vyzerajú ako inžinierske rekvizity z grotesky,

I realize that I stumbled on something bigger than that.

s ich pomocou som objavila niečo oveľa dôležitejšie.

It's this expression of joy and humility that often gets lost in engineering,

Našla som pocit radosti a pokory, ktoré sa v inžinierstve často strácajú.

and for me it was a way to learn about hardware

U mňa to bolo tak, že študovaním hardvéru som úspešne prekonala strašnú trému.

without having my performance anxiety get in the way.

I often get asked if I think I'm ever going to build something useful,

Často sa ma pýtajú, či raz zostrojím aj niečo užitočné.

and maybe someday I will.

Možno áno.

But the way I see it,

Podľa mňa sa mi to však už podarilo.

I already have

because I've built myself this job

Veď som si vytvorila túto prácu.

and it's something that I could never have planned for,

Nefigurovala v mojich plánoch,

or that I could --

ani som o nej...

(Applause)

(potlesk)

It's something that I could never have planned for.

Proste som o takejto práci ani nesnívala.

Instead it happened just because I was enthusiastic about what I was doing,

A predsa sa stala skutočnosťou, lebo som sa do nej pustila s nadšením,

a svojou vášňou som nakazila aj ostatných.

and I was sharing that enthusiasm with other people.

To me that's the true beauty of making useless things,

Práve v tomto vidím skutočnú krásu vyrábania zbytočných prístrojov.

because it's this acknowledgment

V tom, že si musíme priznať, že nepoznáme všetky odpovede.

that you don't always know what the best answer is.

And it turns off that voice in your head

Umlčí nám to v hlave ten hlások, ktorý hovorí,

that tells you that you know exactly how the world works.

že presne vieme, ako tento svet funguje.

Možno prilba na umývanie zubov nezodpovie otázku,

And maybe a toothbrush helmet isn't the answer,

but at least you're asking the question.

ale aspoň sme si ju položili.

Thank you.

Ďakujem!

(Applause)

(potlesk)