Jill Shargaa: Please, please, people. Let's put the 'awe' back in 'awesome'

翻译人员: Ruoxin Zheng 校对人员: Zhiting Chen

How many times have you used the word "awesome" today?

今天你们用了多少次“棒极了”这个词？

Once? Twice? Seventeen times?

一次？两次？ 十七次？

Do you remember what you were describing

你还记得用这词的时候

when you used the word?

是在说什么吗？

No, I didn't think so, because it's come down to this, people:

我猜你不记得了， 因为其实，各位：

You're using the word incorrectly,

…这词你们用错了。

and tonight I hope to show you

而今晚我希望可以展示

how to put the "awe" back in "awesome."

怎么把 “敬畏” 放还回 “棒极了”这种描述之中。

Recently, I was dining at an outdoor cafe,

最近，我在一个露天咖啡店吃东西，

and the server came up to our table,

有个服务员走到我们桌边，

and asked us if we had dined there before,

问我们以前有没有来过，

and I said, "Yes, yes, we have."

然后我回答， “有，我们来过。”

And she said, "Awesome."

她说， “棒极了"。

And I thought, "Really?

我想， “你认真的？

Awesome or just merely good

我们再次来你的咖啡店

that we decided to visit your restaurant again?"

是'棒极了'还是仅仅是'挺好的'?"

The other day, one of my coworkers asked me

有一天，一个同事问我是否

if I could save that file as a PDF,

可以把那个文档保存成PDF，

and I said, "Well, of course," and he said, "Awesome."

然后我说， "当然可以，“ 他也说, "棒极了。”

Seriously, can saving anything as a PDF

老实说，把文档保存成PDF都算

be awesome?

“棒极了”吗？

Sadly, the frequent overuse of the word "awesome"

可惜，频繁过度使用的“棒极了”

has now replaced words like "great" and "thank you."

已经取代了其他词， 比如 “很好” 和 "谢谢“。

So Webster's dictionary defines the word "awesome"

韦氏字典把“棒极了”定义为

as fear mingled with admiration or reverence,

畏惧参杂着倾慕或崇敬的感觉，

a feeling produced by something majestic.

一种由雄伟壮观的 事物引发的情感。

Now, with that in mind,

请记住这个定义，

was your Quiznos sandwich awesome?

你的Quiznos三明治是 “棒极了” 吗？

How about that parking space? Was that awesome?

那个停车位是“棒极了”吗？

Or that game the other day? Was that awesome?

或者那天的比赛也是“棒极了”吗？

The answer is no, no and no.

回答是：不是，不是和不是。

A sandwich can be delicious,

一份三明治可以美味，

that parking space can be nearby,

那个停车位可以在附近，

and that game can be a blowout,

还有那个比赛可以是狂胜，

but not everything can be awesome.

但不是所有事情都是“棒极了”。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

So when you use the word "awesome"

所以你们用“棒极了”这词

to describe the most mundane of things,

描述最平凡的东西的时候，

you're taking away the very power of the word.

你们忽略了这个单词 所能表达的力量。

This author says, "Snowy days

这个作者说， “雪天

or finding money in your pants is awesome."

或者在裤子找到钱是'棒极了'。”

(Laughter)

（笑声）

Um, no, it is not,

啊，不，不是，

and we need to raise the bar for this poor schmuck. (Laughter)

我们要为这个屌丝提高标准。 （笑声）

So in other words, if you have everything, you value nothing.

所以换句话说，如果 你拥有一切，你就不会去重视它们。

It's a lot like drinking from a firehose

很像用消防水带喝水，

like this jackass right here.

像这个蠢货一样。

There's no dynamic, there's no highs or lows,

如果所有的事都是“棒极了”，

if everything is awesome.

就没有动态变化，没有高低比较了。

Ladies and gentlemen, here are 10 things

诸位，这里有十件东西

that are truly awesome.

真正是“棒极了”的。

Imagine, if you will, having to schlep

设想，如果你必须

everything on your back.

用你的后背背负一切。

Wouldn't this be easier for me

如果能让它滚动着回家，

if I could roll this home?

我是不是就可以轻松一点呢？

Yes, so I think I'll invent the wheel.

是的，所以我想我会发明那个轮子。

The wheel, ladies and gentlemen.

轮子，各位。

Is the wheel awesome? Say it with me.

轮子“棒极了”吗？跟我一起说！

Yes, the wheel is awesome!

是，轮子是“棒极了”！

The Great Pyramids were the tallest

金字塔曾在4000年中

man-made structure in the world

都是世界最高的

for 4,000 years.

人造建筑。

Pharaoh had his slaves move millions of blocks

法老叫他的奴隶搬几百万石块，

just to this site to erect a big freaking headstone.

就为了去这个地方 竖起一块吓人的墓碑。

Were the Great Pyramids awesome?

金字塔是“棒极了”吗？

Yes, the pyramids were awesome.

是，金字塔是“棒极了”。

The Grand Canyon. Come on.

接着说，大峡谷。看吧！

It's almost 80 million years old.

差不多八千万岁了。

Is the Grand Canyon awesome?

大峡谷是“棒极了”吗？

Yes, the Grand Canyon is.

是，大峡谷是的。

Louis Daguerre invented photography in 1829,

1829年路易达盖尔发明了摄影，

and earlier today,

今天稍早的时候，

when you whipped out your smartphone

你拿出手机，

and you took a shot of your awesome sandwich,

拍你的‘棒极了’的三明治的时候，

and you know who you are —

你们知道我说的是谁—

(Laughter) —

（笑声）—

wasn't that easier than exposing the image

难道不比把图像在覆盖了

to copper plates coated with iodized silver?

碘化银的铜片上曝光容易吗？

I mean, come on. Is photography awesome?

我的意思是，摄影是“棒极了”吗？

Yes, photography is awesome.

是，摄影是“棒极了”。

D-Day, June 6, 1944,

诺曼底登陆日，1944年6月6日，

the Allied invasion of Normandy,

诺曼底盟军的进军，

the largest amphibious invasion in world history.

世界历史最大的两栖进军。

Was D-Day awesome? Yes, it was awesome.

诺曼底登陆日是“棒极了”吗？ 是，是“棒极了”。

Did you eat food today? Did you eat?

今天你们吃过东西吗？你吃了吗？

Then you can thank the honeybee, that's the one,

你得多谢蜜蜂，就是这只，

because if crops aren't pollinated, we can't grow food,

因为如果作物没有授粉， 我们就不能种植食物，

and then we're all going to die.

然后我们都会死。

It's just like that.

就是这样。

But it's not like a flower can just get up

但是并不是一朵花能直接起来

and have sex with another flower,

跟另一朵花交配，

although that would be awesome.

虽然那会是“棒极了”。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

Bees are awesome. Are you kidding me?

蜜蜂是“棒极了”。不可思议是吧？

Landing on the moon! Come on!

登陆月球！继续！

Apollo 11. Are you kidding me?

阿波罗11号。开玩笑吧？

Sixty-six years after the Wright Brothers

莱特兄弟在北卡罗来纳州的基蒂霍克

took off from Kitty Hawk, North Carolina,

第一次飞上天66年以后， 尼尔阿姆斯特朗

Neil Armstrong was 240,000 miles away.

飞到了二十四万英里之远的地方。

That's like from here to the moon.

就相当于从这里到月亮。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

That's one small step for a man,

对一个人那是小步，

one giant leap for awesome!

对“棒极了”却是一大步！

You're damn right, it was.

的确，确实是的。

Woodstock, 1969: Rolling Stone Magazine said

1969年的伍德斯托克音乐节： 滚石杂志称

this changed the history of rock and roll.

这件事改变了摇滚的历史。

Tickets were only 24 dollars back then.

当时票价只有24美元。

You can't even buy a freaking t-shirt for that now.

现在连一件该死的T恤都买不到。

Jimi Hendrix's version of "The Star-Spangled Banner"

吉米亨得里克斯版本的 “星条旗永不落”

was the most iconic.

是最标志性的。

Was Woodstock awesome? Yes, it was awesome.

伍德斯托克音乐节是“棒极了”吗？ 是，是“棒极了”。

Sharks! They're at the top of the food chain.

鲨鱼！它们在食物链顶端。

Sharks have multiple rows of teeth

鲨鱼有好几列牙齿，

that grow in their jaw

长在下巴上，

and they move forward like a conveyor belt.

可以像输送带一样向前移动。

Some sharks can lose 30,000 teeth in their lifetime.

某些鲨鱼一生，会掉3万颗牙齿。

Does awesome inspire fear?

“棒极了”激发了恐惧吗？

噢，对，鲨鱼是“棒极了”！

Oh, hell yeah, sharks are awesome!

互联网在1982年诞生，

The Internet was born in 1982

and it instantly took over global communication,

它即刻占领了全球的通信，

and later tonight, when all these PowerPoints

今晚，当所有这些PPT

上传到网上的时候，

are uplifted to the Internet

so that a guy in Siberia can get drunk

远在西伯利亚的某个人也能酩酊大醉地

and watch this crap,

观看这堆废话，

the Internet is awesome.

互联网是“棒极了”。

And finally, finally some of you can't wait

最后，最后你们有些人等不及

to come up and tell me how awesome my PowerPoint was.

上来告诉我，我的PPT是"棒极了"的。

I will save you the time.

我会节约您的时间。

It was not awesome, but it was true,

不是"棒极了"的，但都是真实的，

and I hope it was entertaining,

我希望它能博大家一笑，

and out of all the audiences I've ever had,

另外在我所有的观众中，

y'all are the most recent. Thank you and good night.

你们是——最近的一批。 谢谢，晚安。

(Applause)

（掌声）