Jackie Tabick: The balancing act of compassion

Traducător: Carmen Neghina Corector: Andra Foca

One of my favorite cartoon characters is Snoopy.

Unul din personajele mele animate preferate este Snoopy.

I love the way he sits and lies on his kennel and contemplates the great things of life.

Iubesc felul in care se aseaza si sta in canisa lui si contempleaza lucrurile marete ale vietii.

So when I thought about compassion,

Asa ca atunci cand m-am gandit la compasiune,

my mind immediately went to one of the cartoon strips,

mintea mea a zburat imediat la una din benzile animate

where he's lying there and he says,

in care sta si spune:

"I really understand, and I really appreciate

"Inteleg si chiar apreciez

how one should love one's neighbor as one love's oneself.

faptul ca ar trebui sa-ti iubesti vecinul precum te iubesti pe tine insuti.

The only trouble is the people next door; I can't stand them."

Singura problema sunt insa vecinii mei. Nu ii suport."

This, in a way, is one of the challenges

Aceasta, intr-un fel, este una din provocarile

of how to interpret a really good idea.

modului in care poti sa interpretezi o idee buna.

We all, I think, believe in compassion.

Cu totii, presupun, credem in compasiune.

If you look at all the world religions, all the main world religions,

Daca ne uitam la religiile lumii, la religiile majore ale lumii,

you'll find within them some teaching concerning compassion.

vom gasi in ele invataturi privind compasiunea.

So in Judaism, we have, from our Torah,

In Iudaism, mai exact in Tora noastra, exista ideea

that you should love your neighbor as you love yourself.

ca ar trebui sa-ti iubesti vecinul asa cum te iubesti pe tine insuti.

And within Jewish teachings, the rabbinic teachings, we have Hillel,

Iar in invataturile evreiesti, in predicile rabinilor, Hillel ne spune

who taught that you shouldn't do to others what you don't like being done to yourself.

ca nu ar trebui sa faci altora ce tie nu ti-ar placea sa ti se faca.

And all the main religions have similar teachings.

Toate religiile mari au invataturi similare.

And again, within Judaism,

Si din nou, in iudaism,

we have a teaching about God,

avem invataturi despre Dumnezeu.

who is called the compassionate one, Ha-rachaman.

care este numit Ha-rachaman, adica "cel milostiv".

After all, how could the world exist without God being compassionate?

La urma urmelor, cum ar putea sa existe lumea fara un Dumnezeu plin de compasiune?

And we, as taught within the Torah that we are made in the image of God,

Si, asa cum se spune in Tora, ca suntem creati dupa chipul lui Dumnenezu,

so we too have to be compassionate.

ar trebui sa fim cu totii plini de compasiune.

But what does it mean? How does it impact on our everyday life?

Dar ce intelegem prin asta? Ce impact are acest fapt asupra vietii noastre de zi cu zi?

Sometimes, of course, being compassionate

Cateodata, bineinteles, a fi compatimitor

can produce feelings within us that are very difficult to control.

poate produce inauntrul nostru sentimente care sunt foarte dificil de controlat.

I know there are many times when I've gone and conducted a funeral,

De multe ori cand am asistat la inmormantari

or when I have been sitting with the bereaved, or with people who are dying,

sau cand am stat cu persoane indoliate ori pe patul de moarte,

and I am overwhelmed by the sadness, by the difficulty,

mi s-a intamplat sa fiu complesita de tristetea, de dificultatea,

the challenge that is there for the family, for the person.

de provocarea cu care se confrunta familia si persoana in sine.

And I'm touched, so that tears come to my eyes.

Eram atat de emotionata incat imi dadeau lacrimile.

And yet, if I just allowed myself to be overwhelmed by these feelings,

Si totusi, daca mi-as fi permis sa fiu complesita de aceste sentimente,

I wouldn't be doing my job --

nu mi-as fi facut treaba,

because I have to actually be there for them

pentru ca de fapt misiunea mea e sa fiu acolo pentru ei

and make sure that rituals happen, that practicalities are seen to.

si sa fiu sigura ca ritualurile au loc, si ca formalitatile sunt puse la punct.

And yet, on the other hand, if I didn't feel this compassion,

Si totusi, pe de alta parte, daca nu as fi simtit aceasta compasiune

then I feel that it would be time for me to hang up my robe

atunci cred ca ar fi fost timpul sa imi pun roba in cui

and give up being a rabbi.

si sa renunt la a mai fi rabin.

And these same feelings are there for all of us as we face the world.

Iar sentimentele acestea sunt acolo pentru noi toti atunci cand infruntam lumea.

Who cannot be touched by compassion

Cine nu e atins de compasiune,

when we see the terrible horrors of the results of war,

atunci cand vede ororile cauzate de razboi,

or famine, or earthquakes, or tsunamis?

de foamete, sau cutremure si tsunami?

I know some people who say

Cunosc oameni care spun:

"Well, you know there's just so much out there -- I can't do anything,

"Vezi, se intampla atatea lucruri in lume, incat nu pot face nimic.

I'm not going to even begin to try."

Nici macar nu am sa incerc sa fac ceva."

And there are some charity workers who call this compassion fatigue.

Exista filantropisti care numesc asta "osteneala de compasiune".

There are others who feel they can't confront compassion anymore,

Sunt altii care simt ca nu pot sa se mai confrunte cu compasiunea,

and so they turn off the television and don't watch.

prin urmare isi inchid televizorul si nu mai privesc.

In Judaism, though, we tend to always say, there has to be a middle way.

In iudaism insa, avem tendinta mereu de a cauta calea de mijloc.

You have to, of course, be aware of the needs of others,

Trebuie, desigur, sa fii constient de nevoile altora,

but you have to be aware in such a way that you can carry on with your life

dar trebuie sa fii constient intr-un asemenea mod, incat sa iti poti continua viata

and be of help to people.

si sa fii de folos oamenilor.

So part of compassion has to be an understanding of what makes people tick.

Asa ca o parte a compasiunii consta in a intelege ce ii motiveaza pe oameni.

And, of course, you can't do that unless you understand yourself a bit more.

Si, bineinteles, nu poti sa faci asta fara sa te intelegi pe tine putin mai bine.

And there's a lovely rabbinic interpretation of the beginnings of creation,

Si exista o interpretare rabinica a inceputului facerii

which says that when God created the world,

care spune ca atunci cand Dumnezeu a creat lumea,

God thought that it would be best to create the world

Dumnezeu a crezut ca va fi cel mai bine sa creeze lumea

only with the divine attribute of justice.

numai cu atributul divin al justitiei.

Because, after all, God is just.

Deoarece, pana la urma, Dumnezeu este drept.

Therefore, there should be justice throughout the world.

Asadar, justitia trebuie sa existe in intreaga lume.

And then God looked to the future and realized,

Dumnezeu s-a uitat in viitor si a realizat ca

if the world was created just with justice, the world couldn't exist.

daca lumea ar fi creata doar cu justitie, nu ar putea exista.

So, God thought, "Nope, I'm going to create the world just with compassion."

Asa ca, Dumnezeu s-a gandit: "Nu, voi crea lumea doar cu compasiune."

And then God looked to the future and realized that,

Si apoi Dumnezeu s-a uitat in viitor si a realizat ca

in fact, if the world were just filled with compassion,

de fapt, daca lumea ar fi doar plina de compasiune,

there would be anarchy and chaos.

ar fi anarhie si haos.

There had to be limits to all things.

Trebuie sa existe o limita pentru toate lucrurile.

The rabbis describe this as being like a king

Rabinii descriu acest lucru facand o comparatie cu un rege

who has a beautiful, fragile glass bowl.

care are un bol de sticla frumos si fragil.

If you put too much cold water in, it will shatter.

Daca pui inauntru prea multa apa rece, se va sparge.

If you put boiling water in, it will shatter.

Daca pui in bol apa fierbinte, se va sparge.

What do you have to do? Put in a mixture of the two.

Ce trebuie sa faci? Sa torni un amestec din cele doua.

And so God put both of these possibilities into the world.

Asa ca Dumnezeu a lasat ambele posibilitati in lume.

There is something more though that has to be there.

Trebuie sa mai adaugam ceva in amestec.

And that is the translation of the feelings

Si asta consta in aplicarea emotiilor

that we may have about compassion

pe care le avem despre compasiune

into the wider world, into action.

in lumea larga, in actiuni.

So, like Snoopy, we can't just lie there

Stiti, nu putem doar sa stam, precum Snoopy

and think great thoughts about our neighbors.

si sa gandim lucruri minunate despre vecinii nostri.

We actually have to do something about it.

Trebuie sa facem ceva in privinta aceasta.

And so there is also, within Judaism, this notion of love and kindness

Astfel exista in iudaism aceasta notiune de iubire si de bunatate

that becomes very important: "chesed."

care este foarte importanta: "Chesed" (bunatate).

All these three things, then, have to be melded together.

Toate aceste trei lucru trebuie sa fie combinate.

The idea of justice, which gives boundaries to our lives

Ideea de justitie care stabileste unele limite in vietile noastre

and gives us a feeling of what's right about life, what's right about living,

si ne arata ce este corect in viata, cum se traieste corect,

what should we be doing, social justice.

cum ar trebui sa ne comportam, ce este justitie sociala.

There has to be a willingness to do good deeds,

Trebuie sa existe o dorinta de a face lucruri bune,

but not, of course, at the expense of our own sanity.

dar nu, bineinteles, in detrimentul cumpatarii proprii.

You know, there's no way that you can do anything for anyone

Stiti, nu este posibil sa faci ceva pentru o persoana,

if you overdo things.

daca exagerezi.

And balancing them all in the middle is this notion of compassion,

Echilibrand toate astea, obtii notiunea de compasiune.

which has to be there, if you like, at our very roots.

Ea trebuie sa fie acolo, daca doriti, la radacinile noastre.

This idea of compassion comes to us

Gasim in noi ideea de compasiune

because we're made in the image of God,

pentru ca suntem facuti dupa chipul lui Dumnezeu.

who is ultimately the compassionate one.

Care este, in cele din urma, Cel plin de compasiune.

What does this compassion entail?

Ce cuprinde aceasta compasiune?

It entails understanding the pain of the other.

Cuprinde intelegerea durerii altuia.

But even more than that,

Ba chiar mai mult de atat,

it means understanding one's connection to the whole of creation:

inseamna intelegerea legaturii proprii cu creatia intreaga,

understanding that one is part of that creation,

intelegerea faptului ca suntem o parte a acelei creatii,

that there is a unity that underlies all that we see,

si ca exista o armonie in tot ceea ce vedem,

all that we hear, all that we feel.

auzim si simtim.

I call that unity God.

Eu numesc aceasta armonie Dumnezeu.

And that unity is something that connects all of creation.

Iar aceasta armonie este ceva ce leaga toata creatia.

And, of course, in the modern world, with the environmental movement,

O data cu miscarea ecologica din lumea moderna,

we're becoming even more aware of the connectivity of things,

am devenit cu totii mai constienti de legaturile dintre lucruri,

that something I do here actually does matter in Africa,

ca ceea ce fac aici conteaza in Africa,

that if I use too much of my carbon allowance,

ca daca folosesc prea mult carbon,

it seems to be that we are causing

se pare ca duce la

a great lack of rain in central and eastern Africa.

o lipsa importanta de ploi in Africa centrala si de est.

So there is a connectivity,

Deci exista o legatura.

and I have to understand that -- as part of the creation,

Si trebuie sa inteleg acest lucru ca o parte a creatiei,

as part of me being made in the image of God.

ca parte din mine care am fost facuta dupa chipul lui Dumnezeu.

And I have to understand that my needs

Si trebuie sa inteleg ca nevoile mele

sometimes have to be sublimated to other needs.

trebuie sa cedeze uneori in fata nevoilor celorlalti.

This "18 minutes" business, I find quite fascinating.

Ma fascineaza aceasta activitate de 18 minute.

Because in Judaism, the number 18, in Hebrew letters,

Deoarece in iudaism, cuvantul si numarul 18 in litere ebraice,

stands for life -- the word "life."

inseamna viata, cuvantul viata.

So, in a sense, the 18 minutes is challenging me to say,

Deci, intr-un fel, cele 18 minute ma provoaca sa spun

"In life, this is what's important in terms of compassion."

"Asta este ce e important in viata cand vorbim despre compasiune",

But, something else as well:

dar si altceva in acelasi timp.

actually, 18 minutes is important.

De fapt, 18 minute sunt importante.

Because at Passover, when we have to eat unleavened bread,

Deoarece, de Paste, cand trebuie sa mancam paine nedospita,

the rabbis say, what is the difference between dough that is made into bread,

rabinii intreaba care este diferenta dintre aluatul din care se face paine,

and dough that is made into unleavened bread, or "matzah"?

si aluatul din care se face paine nedospita: matzah.

And they say "It's 18 minutes."

Si ei raspund: 18 minute.

Because that's how long they say it takes for this dough to become leaven.

Deoarece atat dureaza ca aluatul sa ajunga dospit.

What does it mean, "dough becomes leaven"?

Si ce inseamna cand aluatul devine dospit?

It means it gets filled with hot air.

Inseamna ca se umple cu aer fierbinte.

What's matzah? What's unleavened bread? You don't get it.

Ce este matzah? Ce este painea nedospita? Nu intelegeti.

Symbolically, what the rabbis say is that at Passover,

In mod simbolic, ceea ce rabinii spun, este ca de Paste,

what we have to do is try to get rid of our hot air -- our pride,

trebuie sa incercam sa eliminam aerul fierbinte, mandria noastra,

our feeling that we are the most important people in the whole entire world,

sentimentul ca suntem cei mai importanti oameni din intreaga lume,

and that everything should revolve round us.

si ca totul ar trebui sa se invarta in jurul nostru.

So we try and get rid of those,

Asa ca incercam sa ne debarasam de acestea,

and so doing, try to get rid of the habits, the emotions, the ideas

si deci sa ne debarasam de obiceiurile, emotiile, ideile

that enslave us, that make our eyes closed, give us tunnel vision

care ne robesc, care ne inchid ochii si ne dau o viziune de tunel

so we don't see the needs of others --

astfel incat nu vedem nevoile altora,

and free ourselves and free ourselves from that.

si nu putem sa ne eliberam de acestea.

And that too is a basis for having compassion,

Si aceasta este si ea baza compasiunii

for understanding our place in the world.

pentru a ne intelege locul in lume.

Now there is, in Judaism, a gorgeous story

In iudaism exista o poveste superba

of a rich man who sat in synagogue one day.

a unui om bogat care statea in sinagoga intr-o zi.

And, as many people do, he was dozing off during the sermon.

Si, precum multi oameni, atipea in timpul slujbei.

And as he was dozing off, they were reading from the book of Leviticus in the Torah.

In timp ce se citea din Leviticul din Tora, el atipise.

And they were saying that in the ancient times in the temple in Jerusalem,

Tocmai ce spuneau ca in timpuri stravechi in templul din Ierusalim,

the priests used to have bread,

preotii obisnuiau sa aiba paine,

which they used to place into a special table in the temple in Jerusalem.

pe care o puneau pe o masa speciala in templul din Ierusalim.

The man was asleep, but he heard the words bread, temple, God, and he woke up.

Omul dormea, dar a auzit cuvintele paine, templu, Dumnezeu si s-a trezit.

He said, "God wants bread. That's it. God wants bread. I know what God wants."

Si a spus, "Dumnezeu vrea paine. Asta este. Dumnezeu vrea paine. Stiu ce vrea Dumnezeu."

And he rushed home. And after the Sabbath, he made 12 loaves of bread,

Si apoi s-a grabit acasa. Iar acolo, dupa Sabbath, a facut 12 paini,

took them to the synagogue, went into the synagogue,

le-a luat la sinagoga si a intrat,

opened the ark and said, "God, I don't know why you want this bread, but here you are."

a deschis chivotul si a spus, "Dumneze, nu stiu de ce vrei aceasta paine, dar poftim."

And he put it in the ark with the scrolls of the Torah.

Si a pus-o in chivotul incare se aflau sulurile cu Tora.

Then he went home.

Apoi a mers acasa.

The cleaner came into the synagogue.

Omul de serviciu a intrat in sinagoga.

"Oh God, I'm in such trouble. I've got children to feed.

"O, Doamne, am o problema atat de mare. Am copii de hranit.

My wife's ill. I've got no money. What can I do?"

Nevasta mea este bolnava. Nu am bani. Ce pot sa fac?"

He goes into the synagogue. "God, will you please help me?

Intra in sinagoga. "Dumnezeu, poti sa ma ajuti, te rog?"

Ah, what a wonderful smell."

"A, ce miros frumos."

He goes to the ark. He opens the ark.

Se duce spre chivot. Deschide chivotul.

"There's bread! God, you've answered my plea. You've answered my question."

"Este paine aici! Dumnezeu, mi-ai raspuns rugamintii! Mi-ai raspuns la intrebare."

Takes the bread and goes home.

Ia painea si se duce acasa.

Meanwhile, the rich man thinks to himself,

Intre timp, omul bogat se gandeste,

"I'm an idiot. God wants bread?

"Sunt un idiot. Dumnezeu vrea paine?

God, the one who rules the entire universe, wants my bread?"

Dumnezeu, cel care controleaza intregul univers, vrea paine mea?"

He rushes to the synagogue. "I'll get it out of the ark before anybody finds it."

Se grabeste inapoi la sinagoga. "O voi scote din chivot inainte sa o gaseasca cineva."

He goes in there, and it's not there.

Intra si nu gaseste painea acolo.

And he says, "God, you really did want it. You wanted my bread.

Si spune, "Doamne, chiar ai vrut-o. Ai vrut paine mea.

Next week, with raisins."

Saptamana viitoare, paine cu stafide."

This went on for years.

Asta a continuat timp de patru ani.

Every week, the man would bring bread with raisins,

In fiecare saptamana, omul aducea paine cu stafide,

with all sorts of good things, put it into the ark.

cu tot felul de lucruri, si o punea in chivot.

Every week, the cleaner would come. "God you've answered my plea again."

In fiecare saptamana, omul de serviciu venea. "Doamne, mi-ai raspuns la rugaciune din nou."

Take the bread. Take it home.

Lua painea. O ducea acasa.

Went on until a new rabbi came. Rabbis always spoil things.

Asta a continuat pana cand a venit un nou rabin. Rabinii mereu strica lucrurile.

The rabbi came in and saw what was going on.

Rabinul a venit si a vazut ce se intampla.

And he called the two of them to his office.

Si i-a chemat pe cei doi in biroul lui.

And he said, you know, "This is what's happening."

Si a spus, stiti, "Asta s-a intamplat de fapt."

And the rich man -- oh, dear -- crestfallen.

Omul bogat, descurajat, a spus:

"You mean God didn't want my bread?"

"Vrei sa spui ca Dumnezeu nu a vrut painea?"

And the poor man said, "And you mean God didn't answer my pleas?"

Iar omul sarac spuse, "Si vrei sa spui ca Dumnezeu nu mi-a raspuns la rugaciuni?"

And the rabbi said, "You've misunderstood me.

Iar rabinul a raspuns: "M-ati inteles gresit."

You've misunderstood totally," he said.

"M-ati inteles complet gresit", a spus el.

"Of course, what you are doing," he said to the rich man,

"Bineinteles ca ceea ce faci", i-a spus omului bogat,

"is answering God's plea that we should be compassionate.

"este sa raspunzi la rugamintea Domnului de a fi plin de compasiune."

And God," he said to the poor man, "is answering your plea

"Iar Dumnezeu," i-a spus omului sarac, "iti raspunde la ruga

that people should be compassionate and give."

aratandu-ti ca oamenii ar trebuie sa fie plini de compasiune si daruitori."

He looked at the rich man. He held the rich man's hands and said,

S-a uitat la omul bogat. I-a luat mana si a spus,

"Don't you understand?" He said, "These are the hands of God."

"Nu intelegi?," a spus, "acestea sunt mainile lui Dumnezeu."

So that is the way I feel:

Deci asa simt,

that I can only try to approach this notion of being compassionate,

ca pot sa abordez aceasta notiune de a fi plin de compasiune,

of understanding that there is a connectivity, that there is a unity in this world;

de a intelege ca exista o legatura si armonie in aceasta lume,

that I want to try and serve that unity,

si ca vreau sa incerc sa servesc acea armonie,

and that I can try and do that by understanding, I hope,

si ca pot sa incerc sa fac asta prin intelegere, sper,

trying to understand something of the pain of others;

incercand sa inteleg ceva din durerea altora,

but understanding that there are limits, that people have to bear responsibility

dar intelegand ca sunt limite, ca oamenii trebuie sa-mi asume responsabilitati

for some of the problems that come upon them;

pentru unele din problemele cu care se confrunta,

and that I have to understand that there are limits to my energy,

si trebuie sa inteleg ca energia mea are limite,

to the giving I can give.

si ca nu pot darui la nesfarsire.

I have to reevaluate them,

Trebuie sa le reevaluez,

try and separate out the material things

sa incerc sa separ lucrurile materiale

and my emotions that may be enslaving me,

de emotiile care pot sa ma subjuge,

so that I can see the world clearly.

astfel incat sa vad lumea intr-un mod clar.

And then I have to try to see in what ways

Si apoi trebuie sa incerc sa vad in ce moduri

I can make these the hands of God.

pot sa fac din mainile astea mainile lui Dumnezeu.

And so try to bring compassion to life in this world.

Si astfel sa aduc compasiune in aceasta lume.