Courtney Martin: Reinventing feminism

譯者: A&J Alisa&Jenny 審譯者: Coco Shen

So I was born

我出生於70年代

on the last day

最後一年

of the last year of the '70s.

的最後一天

I was raised on "Free to be you and me" --

我是被“自在作自己”

(cheering)

(註:1974年New Seekers的一首主打歌) (掌聲)

hip-hop --

和嘻哈音樂給養大的

not as many woohoos for hip-hop in the house.

顯然現場沒有太多人幫嘻哈音樂歡呼

Thank you. Thank you for hip-hop --

謝謝你們.謝謝你們幫嘻哈音樂歡呼

and Anita Hill.

也謝謝你們幫Anita Hill歡呼

(Cheering)

(註:1991年因受到男性主管的性騷擾﹐公然起訴聯邦大法官的女子)(掌聲)

My parents were radicals --

我父母是激進份子

(Laughter)

（笑聲）

who became,

然後

well, grown-ups.

長大成人

My dad facetiously says,

我爸曾開玩笑說

"We wanted to save the world,

我們想要拯救世界

and instead we just got rich."

結果卻變得有錢“

We actually just got "middle class"

說真的我們不過是

in Colorado Springs, Colorado,

科羅拉多州的中產階級

but you get the picture.

但你懂他的意思

I was raised with a very heavy sense

我在一個沉重

of unfinished legacy.

且未完成的使命下長大

At this ripe old age of 30,

站在30歲的邊緣

I've been thinking a lot about what it means to grow up

我一直在思考長大的意義

in this horrible, beautiful time,

在這個可怕又美麗的年代

and I've decided, for me,

最終我為我自己下了一個結論

it's been a real journey and paradox.

這是一場充滿矛盾的旅程

The first paradox

第一個矛盾的地方是

is that growing up is about rejecting the past

長大好像就是不斷的否決過去

and then promptly reclaiming it.

又突然的想修正回來

Feminism was the water I grew up in.

我從小生長在充滿女性主義的環境中

When I was just a little girl,

當我還是個小女孩時

my mom started what is now

我媽媽開始創辦了

the longest-running women's film festival in the world.

到目前為止世界上為期最久的女性電影節

So while other kids were watching sitcoms and cartoons,

當其他小孩還在看喜劇與卡通時

I was watching very esoteric documentaries

我都在看圈內的

made by and about women.

女性製作的女權記錄片

You can see how this had an influence.

你可以想見它的影響力

But she was not the only feminist in the house.

但我媽可不是這個家 唯一的女權主義者

My dad actually resigned

事實上我爸也從我家附近一家

from the male-only business club in my hometown

只允許男性加入的俱樂部中退出了

because he said he would never be part of an organization

因為他說,他絕不會成為只歡迎他兒子

that would one day welcome his son, but not his daughter.

而不歡迎他女兒,那種俱樂部的一份子

(Applause)

(掌聲)

He's actually here today.

事實上他今天也在場

(Applause)

(掌聲)

The trick here

他的想法是

is my brother would become an experimental poet,

我哥會變成一個實驗詩人

not a businessman,

而不是商人

but the intention was really good.

他的出發點是好的

(Laughter)

(笑聲)

In any case, I didn't readily claim the feminist label,

其實在任何時候,我不會特別對外宣稱我是女性主義者

even though it was all around me,

即使我被她們環繞

because I associated it with my mom's women's groups,

因為那總會讓我聯想到我媽以及她的女性社團

her swishy skirts and her shoulder pads --

她的那些長裙,墊肩

none of which had much cachet

在帕米爾高中的走廊上

in the hallways of Palmer High School

都特別顯眼

where I was trying to be cool at the time.

那是當時我嘗試裝酷的地方

But I suspected there was something really important

但我猜這些有關女權的東西

about this whole feminism thing,

可能非常重要

so I started covertly tiptoeing into my mom's bookshelves

所以我開始偷偷的接近我媽的書櫃

and picking books off and reading them --

拿本書然後開始閱讀

never, of course, admitting that I was doing so.

當然，我永遠都不會承認的

I didn't actually claim the feminist label

我不會給自己貼上女權主義的標簽

until I went to Barnard College

直到我進入了伯納大學

and I heard Amy Richards and Jennifer Baumgardner speak for the first time.

第一次聽到了愛咪李奇與珍妮佛卡納的演講

They were the co-authors of a book called "Manifesta."

他們是Manifesta這本書的前作者

So what very profound epiphany, you might ask,

你也許會問,那到底對當下的我,有著甚麼樣深刻的頓悟

was responsible for my feminist click moment?

以及重大影響呢?

Fishnet stockings.

網襪

Jennifer Baumgardner was wearing them.

珍妮佛當時正穿著網襪

I thought they were really hot.

我覺得超辣!

I decided, okay, I can claim the feminist label.

因次我決定,好,我可以幫自己貼上女權主義的標籤

Now I tell you this --

現在我告訴你們這些

I tell you this at the risk of embarrassing myself,

我冒著自己會被取笑的風險

because I think part of the work of feminism

因為我覺得為女性主義工作的一部分

is to admit that aesthetics, that beauty,

就是承認美學,承認美麗

that fun do matter.

和樂趣的重要

There are lots of very modern political movements

有非常多的現代政治運動

that have caught fire in no small part

因為創新文化

because of cultural hipness.

產生很大的影響

Anyone heard of these two guys as an example?

大家有聽到我用他們兩個來做例子嗎?

So my feminism is very indebted to my mom's,

我要感謝母親給我帶來女權主義的觀念

but it looks very different.

但我和她的女權主義很不同

My mom says, "patriarchy."

我母親說"父權主義"

I say, "intersectionality."

我說"交集"

So race, class, gender, ability,

種族, 階級, 性別, 以及能力

all of these things go into our experiences

都會逐漸變成

of what it means to be a woman.

成為一個女人的必然經驗

Pay equity? Yes. Absolutely a feminist issue.

薪資平等?當然,這絕對是女權的議題

But for me, so is immigration. (Applause)

但對我而言,移民也是

Thank you.

謝謝

My mom says, "Protest march."

我母親說過"遊行示威"

I say, "Online organizing."

而我說"線上組織"

I co-edit, along with a collective

我之前跟著一群非常棒又超級聰明的女人們

of other super-smart, amazing women,

一起弄了一個網站

a site called Feministing.com.

叫做" Feministing.com"

We are the most widely read feminist publication ever,

我們的網站是被最多人瀏覽的女性出版網站

and I tell you this

我告訴你們這個

because I think it's really important to see

是因為我覺得看著她們延續下去

that there's a continuum.

是一件非常重要的事

Feminist blogging is basically the 21st century version

女權主義的部落格基本上是21世紀中

of consciousness raising.

女性意識的提升

But we also have a straightforward political impact.

我們也直接承受了政治影響

Feministing has been able

女權主義

to get merchandise pulled off the shelves of Walmart.

是能夠讓商品從沃爾瑪下架的

We got a misogynist administrator sending us hate-mail

曾經有個變態管理員因為寄恐嚇信給我們

fired from a Big Ten school.

而被前十名的好學校開除

And one of our biggest successes

而我們的最大成功之一

is we get mail from teenage girls in the middle of Iowa

就是我們曾經收過一個愛荷華州的小女孩來信說

who say, "I Googled Jessica Simpson and stumbled on your site.

" 我在搜尋Jessica Simpson 時, 碰巧進到你們的網站

I realized feminism wasn't about man-hating and Birkenstocks."

它讓我了解,女權主義並不是恨男生或是勃肯鞋 "

So we're able to pull in the next generation

所以我們能夠用一種全心的方式

in a totally new way.

讓下一代加入我們的行列

My mom says, "Gloria Steinem."

我母親也曾提過Gloria Steinem(註:她是著名的美國女性人權先鋒)

I say, "Samhita Mukhopadhyay,

而我說"Samhita Mukhopadhyay"

Miriam Perez, Ann Friedman,

Miriam Perez, Ann Friedman,

Jessica Valenti, Vanessa Valenti,

Jessica Valenti, Vanessa Valenti,

and on and on and on and on."

還有許許多多的女權主義者

We don't want one hero.

我們不要只有一個英雄

We don't want one icon.

我們不要只有一個標章

We don't want one face.

我們不需要只有一張臉來代替我們所有人

We are thousands of women and men across this country

我們是一起生活在這個國家的數以千萬的女人和男人

doing online writing, community organizing,

從事著網路創作,社區組織

changing institutions from the inside out --

從體制裡開始改變

all continuing the incredible work

所有人都在從事著這不可思議的工作

that our mothers and grandmothers started.

從母親們或祖母們就開始的工作

Thank you.

謝謝

(Applause)

掌聲

Which brings me to the second paradox:

這讓我想到第二個矛盾點

sobering up about our smallness

讓我們意識到我們的眇小

and maintaining faith in our greatness

同時保持我們

all at once.

偉大的信念

Many in my generation --

跟我同年代的很多人

because of well-intentioned parenting and self-esteem education --

因為父母的用心栽培,以及受到自尊式的教育

were socialized to believe

都社會化的相信

that we were special little snowflakes --

我們會走出自己的一片天和拯救世界

(Laughter)

(笑聲)

who were going to go out and save the world.

因為我們都是最特別的小雪花

These are three words many of us were raised with.

我們曾經跟著三個字長大

We walk across graduation stages,

我們走過畢業階段

high on our overblown expectations,

先是高於我們的期待

and when we float back down to earth,

然後我們又回到現實

we realize we don't know what the heck it means

我們忽然發現自己根本不知道

to actually save the world anyway.

拯救世界真正的意義

The mainstream media often paints my generation

主流媒體常常描繪我們這個世代

as apathetic,

是冷漠的時代

and I think it's much more accurate

準確一點來說

to say we are deeply overwhelmed.

我們其實深感打擊

And there's a lot to be overwhelmed about, to be fair --

說句公道話，打擊我們的不只這些

an environmental crisis,

像是環境危機

wealth disparity in this country

我們國家的貧富差距

unlike we've seen since 1928,

不止我們所看到的

and globally,

自1928年

a totally immoral and ongoing wealth disparity.

全球都存在在不道德與貧富差距中

Xenophobia's on the rise. The trafficking of women and girls.

仇外的傾向逐漸加溫 非法販賣婦女及女童...

It's enough to make you feel very overwhelmed.

這些都足以讓我們感到難以承受

I experienced this firsthand myself

在2002年 當我畢業於柏納大學時

when I graduated from Barnard College in 2002.

我曾親身經歷過

I was fired up; I was ready to make a difference.

我充滿熱情，準備要有所做為

I went out and I worked at a non-profit,

我開始為一家非營利公司工作

I went to grad school, I phone-banked,

我進入研究所，我打電話籌款

I protested, I volunteered,

我上街頭，我做義工

and none of it seemed to matter.

但這些似乎都無關緊要

And on a particularly dark night

2004年12月

of December of 2004,

在某個特別漆黑的夜晚

I sat down with my family,

我坐下來和我的家人說

and I said that I had become very disillusioned.

我決定不抱任何幻想了

I admitted that I'd actually had a fantasy -- kind of a dark fantasy --

我承認我曾有個幻想 有點黑暗的幻想

of writing a letter

就是寫一封信

about everything that was wrong with the world

關於這世界上所有的錯

and then lighting myself on fire

然後在白宮的階梯上

on the White House steps.

引火自焚

My mom

我媽

took a drink of her signature Sea Breeze,

喝下一口她最愛的調酒“海風”

her eyes really welled with tears,

眼裡充滿了眼淚

and she looked right at me and she said,

她直直看著我說

"I will not stand

“我絕對不會容忍

for your desperation."

你的絕望行徑”

She said, "You are smarter, more creative

她說“你更聰明，更有創意

and more resilient than that."

更有彈性，你不應如此。”

Which brings me to my third paradox.

我第三個矛盾點是

Growing up is about aiming to succeed wildly

長大不過是瞄準巨大的成功

and being fulfilled by failing really well.

然後徹底失敗

(Laughter)

(笑聲)

(Applause)

(掌聲)

There's a writer I've been deeply influenced by, Parker Palmer,

影響我很深的作家 Parker Palmer(教育、社區、社會改變問題的作者)

and he writes that many of us are often whiplashed

他說我們往往“在自大，高估與

"between arrogant overestimation of ourselves

卑微地低估自己中”

and a servile underestimation of ourselves."

鞭打自己

You may have guessed by now,

你現在可以看到

I did not light myself on fire.

我沒有引火自焚

I did what I know to do in desperation, which is write.

我做了我在絕望中所做的，就是寫

I wrote the book I needed to read.

我寫了本我需要閱讀的書

I wrote a book about eight incredible people

書中描寫我們國家

all over this country

八位從事社會正義

doing social justice work.

了不起的人士

I wrote about Nia Martin-Robinson,

其中有來自底特律的 Nia Martin-Robinson

the daughter of Detroit and two civil rights activists,

和兩個民權運動家

who's dedicating her life

她將一生奉獻於

to environmental justice.

環境正義

I wrote about Emily Apt

我寫 Emily Apt

who initially became a caseworker in the welfare system

一開始她加入社福團體

because she decided that was the most noble thing she could do,

因為她認為這是她所能做的最崇高的事

but quickly learned, not only did she not like it,

但很快發現 她不但不喜歡

but she wasn't really good at it.

她甚至做不好

Instead, what she really wanted to do was make films.

她真正想做的事情，其實是拍電影

So she made a film about the welfare system

她拍了一部有關社會福利制度的電影

and had a huge impact.

有很大的影響力

I wrote about Maricela Guzman, the daughter of Mexican immigrants,

我寫 Maricela Guzman ，一個墨西哥移民之女

who joined the military so she could afford college.

她參加軍隊 只為了付大學學費

She was actually sexually assaulted in boot camp

她在新兵訓練營被性侵

and went on to co-organize a group

於是創建了一個叫

called the Service Women's Action Network.

女兵行動網的組織

What I learned from these people and others

我從他們之中學到的是

was that I couldn't judge them

我不能因為一個人沒有達到崇高的目標

based on their failure to meet their very lofty goals.

就認為他們失敗

Many of them are working in deeply intractable systems --

他們往往在極為疾首的社會體制裡工作

the military, congress,

像是軍隊、國會

the education system, etc.

以及教育體制等等

But what they managed to do within those systems

但是他們設法成為這些體制內

was be a humanizing force.

人性化的力量

And at the end of the day,

到最後

what could possibly be more important than that?

還有什麼比這些更重要的

Cornel West says, "Of course it's a failure.

Cornel West 說"這當然是個失敗"

But how good a failure is it?"

但這是個多好的失敗經驗"

This isn't to say we give up our wildest, biggest dreams.

這不是要我們放棄偉大的夢想

It's to say we operate on two levels.

他是要我們應該有兩種做法

On one,

一個是

we really go after changing these broken systems

我們真的進入這些我們身處的

of which we find ourselves a part.

失敗的體系

But on the other, we root our self-esteem

但把我們的自尊放在日常生活中

in the daily acts of trying to make one person's day

試圖使每個人的每一天

more kind, more just, etc.

更寬容 更公正...

So when I was a little girl,

當我還是個小女孩的時候

I had a couple of very strange habits.

我有些奇怪的習慣

One of them was

其一是

I used to lie on the kitchen floor of my childhood home,

我習慣躺在我舊家廚房的地板上

and I would suck the thumb of my left hand

左手吸吮我的拇指

and hold my mom's cold toes with my right hand.

右手握著我媽冰冷的腳趾

(Laughter)

(笑)

I was listening to her talk on the phone, which she did a lot.

我常偷聽我媽講電話

She was talking about board meetings,

她常常在電話中討論董事會議

she was founding peace organizations,

當時她正創辦和平組織

she was coordinating carpools, she was consoling friends --

她要協調合夥用車，她要安慰朋友...

all these daily acts of care and creativity.

這些所有日常的關懷和創意

And surely, at three and four years old,

可以肯定的是，在三、四歲的時候

I was listening to the soothing sound of her voice,

我聽到她安定人心的聲音

but I think I was also getting my first lesson in activist work.

這也是我成為積極份子的第一課

The activists I interviewed

我採訪的積極份子

had nothing in common, literally, except for one thing,

毫無共通處，除了她們

which was that they all cited their mothers

都說她們的母親

as their most looming and important

是影響她們

activist influences.

成為積極份子的重要原因

So often, particularly at a young age,

所以 特別在我們年輕的時候

we look far afield

我們往往在遠方

for our models of the meaningful life,

找尋一個富有意義的生活的模範

and sometimes they're in our own kitchens,

有時這個模範就在我們自家廚房

talking on the phone, making us dinner,

講電話，做晚餐

doing all that keeps the world going around and around.

盡一切讓世界持續前進

My mom and so many women like her

我媽 還有眾多像我媽一樣的女人

have taught me that life is not about glory,

都教我 人生不是為了榮耀

or certainty, or security even.

或確定 甚至不是安全感

It's about embracing the paradox.

而是欣然接受矛盾

It's about acting in the face of overwhelm.

在難以承受的狀況下開始行動

And it's about loving people really well.

好好愛人

And at the end of the day,

在一日結束後

these things make for a lifetime

這些事會讓我們的一生

of challenge and reward.

充滿挑戰和回饋

Thank you.

謝謝

(Applause)

(掌聲)