Ismael Nazario: What I learned as a kid in jail

翻译人员: Min WANG 校对人员: Rocky LIANG

We need to change the culture in our jails and prisons,

我们需要改变我们的监狱文化，

especially for young inmates.

特别要为了少年犯们。

New York state is one of only two in the U.S.

纽约是美国仅有的两个

that automatically arrests and tries 16- to 17-year-olds as adults.

自动地将16到17岁的少年犯 当作成人对待的州之一。

This culture of violence takes these young people

监狱中的这种暴力文化 会侵蚀这些年轻人,

and puts them in a hostile environment,

并将他们置于一个敌对的环境中，

and the correctional officers pretty much allow any and everything to go on.

而监狱中的看守几乎是 任由这些事情发生。

There's not really much for these young people to do

事实上这些年轻人并没有 多少事情可以做，

来提升自己的才能，并得到改造。

to actually enhance their talent and actually rehabilitate them.

Until we can raise the age of criminal responsibility to 18,

除非我们能将需要负刑事责任的 年龄提高到18岁，

we need to focus on changing the daily lives of these young people.

否则我们就需要集中精力 去改变这些少年犯的日常生活。

I know firsthand.

我有亲身体会。

Before I ever turned 18,

18岁之前，

I spent approximately 400 days on Rikers Island,

我在雷克岛监狱待了大约400天，

and to add to that

补充说明一下，

这其中有差不多300天 我是被单独监禁的。

I spent almost 300 days in solitary confinement,

and let me tell you this:

让我告诉你们我每天 都是怎么度过的：

Screaming at the top of your lungs all day on your cell door

整天在门边大声尖叫，

or screaming at the top of your lungs out the window,

或者对着窗外大声尖叫，

it gets tiring.

你会感到疲倦。

Since there's not much for you to do while you're in there,

因为在里面你没有什么事情可做，

you start pacing back and forth in your cell,

你开始在监室里来回踱步，

you start talking to yourself,

你开始自言自语，

your thoughts start running wild,

你的思想开始狂奔，

and then your thoughts become your own worst enemy.

然后你的思想变成你最大的敌人。

Jails are actually supposed to rehabilitate a person,

监狱本来应该是改造一个人的地方，

not cause him or her to become more angry,

而不是让人变得更愤怒、

frustrated, and feel more hopeless.

泄气和感到更绝望的地方。

Since there's not a discharge plan put in place for these young people,

因为我们没有一个针对这些 年轻人的出狱计划，

they pretty much reenter society with nothing.

所以当他们重返社会时 几乎还是跟以前一个样。

And there's not really much for them to do to keep them from recidivating.

而事实上他们也学不到什么东西 能够防止他们再犯错误。

But it all starts with the C.O.s.

但是一切都要从狱警说起。

It's very easy for some people

对一些人来说，

to look at these correctional officers as the good guys

很容易就会将狱警视为好人，

将犯人视为坏人，

and the inmates as the bad guys,

or vice versa for some,

或者对另一些人来说则相反，

but it's a little more than that.

但是事实却不止于此。

See, these C.O.s are normal, everyday people.

其实这些狱警也不过是 普通的市井小民。

They come from the same neighborhoods as the population they "serve."

他们跟那些他们所“服务”的人 来自相同的社区。

They're just normal people.

他们只是普通人。

They're not robots, and there's nothing special about them.

他们不是机器人， 他们也没什么特别的。

They do pretty much everything anybody else in society does.

他们也会做社会上其他人做的事情。

The male C.O.s want to talk and flirt with the female C.O.s.

男狱警会想跟女狱警聊天和调情。

They play the little high school kid games with each other.

他们互相玩着高中的 孩子们玩的游戏。

They politic with one another.

他们也会彼此算计。

And the female C.O.s gossip to each other.

而女狱警之间也会八卦。

So I spent numerous amounts of time with numerous amounts of C.O.s,

所以我花了大量的时间 跟大数不清的狱警在一起，

and let me tell you about this one in particular named Monroe.

我尤其要给大家讲一讲 一位叫Monroe的狱警。

One day he pulled me in between the A and B doors

一天他把我拉到两扇门之间，

which separate the north and south sides of our housing unit.

这两扇门分隔着南北的单间牢房。

He pulled me there because I had a physical altercation

他把我拉到那边， 是因为我与另一个年轻人

with another young man in my housing unit,

在我住的单间里发生了肢体冲突，

and he felt, since there was a female officer working on the floor,

因为有一个女狱警在这层工作，

that I violated his shift.

他感觉我妨碍了他轮班。

所以他一拳打在我胸部。

So he punched me in my chest.

He kind of knocked the wind out of me.

他把我打得都有点眩晕了。

I wasn't impulsive, I didn't react right away,

我没有冲动，也没有立刻还击，

因为我知道这是他们的地盘。

because I know this is their house.

I have no wins.

我没有胜算。

All he has to do is pull his pin and backup will come immediately.

他只要拉响警报，后援就会立刻出现。

So I just gave him a look in his eyes

所以我只是盯着他的眼睛，

and I guess he saw the anger and frustration just burning,

我想他看到了怒火和沮丧正在燃烧，

and he said to me,

他对我说，

"Your eyes are going to get you in a lot of trouble,

“你的目光会让你惹不少麻烦，

because you're looking like you want to fight."

因为你看上去想要打架。”

So he commenced to taking off his utility belt,

然后他开始脱下他的执勤腰带，

he took off his shirt and his badge,

还有衣服和徽章，

and he said, "We could fight."

他说：“我们来打一架吧。”

So I asked him, "You gonna hold it down?"

我问他：“你会保密？”

Now, that's a term that's commonly used on Rikers Island

那是在雷克岛监狱 经常用到的一个短语，

meaning that you're not going to say anything to anybody,

意思是，你不会和任何人讲，

and you're not going to report it.

也不会上报。

He said, "Yeah, I'm gonna hold it down. You gonna hold it down?"

他说，“是的，我保密。你也要保密？”

I didn't even respond.

我还没回话，

I just punched him right in his face,

便直接一拳打他脸上，

and we began fighting right then and there.

然后我们开始打得天翻地覆。

Towards the end of the fight, he slammed me up against the wall,

在打架快结束的时候， 他把我猛撞到墙上，

so while we were tussled up, he said to me, "You good?"

我们已经扭打成了一团， 他跟我说，“你还好吗？”

as if he got the best of me,

仿佛他战胜了我，

but in my mind, I know I got the best of him,

但我对此心知肚明，是我占了上风，

so I replied very cocky,

所以我非常屌的回复，

"Oh, I'm good, you good?"

“啊，我好着呢，你还好吧？”

He said, "Yeah, I'm good, I'm good."

他说，“是的，我很好，我很好。”

We let go, he shook my hand, said he gave me my respect,

我们停战了，他和我握手， 说他尊重我，

gave me a cigarette and sent me on my way.

给了我一支烟，并把我送回去了。

Believe it or not, you come across some C.O.s on Rikers Island

不管你们信不信，在雷克岛监狱， 你会遇到一些狱警，

that'll fight you one-on-one.

他们会跟你单挑。

They feel that they understand how it is,

他们觉得他们懂规则，

and they feel that I'm going to meet you where you're at.

他们觉得他们应该在 你的地盘和你会面，

Since this is how you commonly handle your disputes,

因为这是你通常处理争议的方式，

we can handle it in that manner.

我们也可以用这种方式处理。

I walk away from it like a man, you walk away from it like a man,

我像个男人一样的离开， 你也像个男人一样的离开，

and that's it.

就这么简单。

Some C.O.s feel that they're jailing with you.

一些狱警认为他们是在跟你一起蹲班房。

This is why they have that mentality and that attitude

于是他们就会有那样的心态和态度，

也会用那样的原则处事。

and they go by that concept.

In some instances, we're in it together with the C.O.s.

某些情况下， 我们的确是喝狱警一起同吃同住的。

However, institutions need to give these correctional officers

但是，监狱要给这些狱警

proper trainings on how to properly deal with the adolescent population,

适当的训练， 如何与未成年人合理的打交道，

and they also need to give them proper trainings

他们也需要给予狱警一些

on how to deal with the mental health population as well.

关于如何和有心理问题的人 相处的训练。

These C.O.s play a big factor in these young people's lives

这些狱警对这些少年犯人影响巨大，

for x amount of time until a disposition is reached on their case.

而且会持续很长时间， 直到他们被释放。

So why not try to mentor these young people while they're there?

那么为什么不在这些年轻人坐牢的时候 为他们提供一些指导？

Why not try to give them some type of insight to make a change,

为什么不让他们学着去领悟， 学着去改变，

so once they reenter back into society,

这样一旦他们重返社会，

they're doing something positive?

他们就会做一些正面的事？

A second big thing to help our teens in jails is better programming.

第二件能够改变少年犯的事情 是更好的教育项目。

When I was on Rikers Island, the huge thing was solitary confinement.

当我在雷克岛监狱， 主要的事情就是单独拘禁。

Solitary confinement was originally designed

单独拘禁原本是为了

to break a person mentally, physically and emotionally.

从心理，生理以及情绪上 去击垮一个人。

That's what it was designed for.

这就是设计它的初衷。

The U.S. Attorney General recently released a report

美国司法部最近发布了一个报告

stating that they're going to ban solitary confinement

声称他们将要禁止纽约州

in New York state for teens.

少年犯的单独拘禁。

One thing that kept me sane while I was in solitary confinement was reading.

当我在单独拘禁的时候， 唯一使我保持心智健全的事就是读书。

I tried to educate myself as much as possible.

我尽量使我自己多受教育。

I read any and everything I could get my hands on.

我读了我能得到的所有东西。

And aside from that, I wrote music and short stories.

除了那些，我还会写歌和短故事。

Some programs that I feel would benefit our young people

我认为有一些项目能使 我们的年轻人受益，

are art therapy programs

比如艺术治疗项目，

for the kids that like to draw and have that talent,

专为喜欢画画并且 拥有才能的孩子们设计，

and what about the young individuals that are musically inclined?

那么，对于喜欢音乐的年轻人呢？

How about a music program for them that actually teaches them

一个教育他们如何创作音乐的

how to write and make music?

音乐项目怎么样？

Just a thought.

这只是一个想法。

When adolescents come to Rikers Island,

当未成年人来到雷克岛监狱，

C74, RNDC is the building that they're housed in.

C74,RNDC就是他们住的地方。

That's nicknamed "gladiator school,"

这地方有个别名，“格斗者学校”，

because you have a young individual coming in from the street

因为有个混迹街头的年轻人进来了，

thinking that they're tough,

通常会自认为很不好惹，

being surrounded by a bunch of other young individuals

被一群其他的年轻人围绕着，

from all of the five boroughs, and everybody feels that they're tough.

他们来自所有5个区， 大家都觉得他们很难对付。

So now you have a bunch of young gentlemen poking their chests out

于是就有一群年轻人挺身而出，

feeling that I have to prove I'm equally as tough as you

觉得需要证明我跟你们一样不好对付，

or I'm tougher than you, you and you.

或者我比你，你还有你更不好对付。

But let's be honest:

但是，老实讲：

That culture is very dangerous and damaging to our young people.

这种文化非常危险， 会伤害我们的年轻人。

We need to help institutions and these teens realize

我们要让监狱和年轻人们发觉

that they don't have to lead the previous lifestyle that they led

他们不必再过以前

when they were on the street, that they can actually make a change.

在街上混的那种生活，他们可以改变。

It's sad to report that while I was in prison,

不过遗憾的是， 在我坐牢的时候，

I used to hear dudes talking about when they get released from prison,

我常常听到弟兄们讲， 当他们被释放，

what type of crimes they're going to commit

回到街上混的时候，

when they get back in the street.

他们要犯个什么案子。

The conversations used to sound something like this:

对话通常听上去是这样的：

"Oh, when I hit the street, my brother got this connection

“当我一回到街上， 我兄弟们搞到这个关系，

for this, that and the third,"

这个，那个，还有第三个。”

or, "My man over here got this connection for the low price.

或者，”我的人在那边 搞到这个关系价格很低的，

Let's exchange information,"

我们可以交换一下信息。”

或者，”当我们一回到市里， 我们要做单大的。“

and, "When we hit the town, we're going to do it real big."

I used to hear these conversations and think to myself, "Wow,

我过去常常听这些对话， 对自己说，”哇哦，

these dudes are really talking about going back in the street

这些家伙真的在谈回到街上，

and committing future crimes."

继续犯案。“

So I came up with a name for that:

因此我想到一个称呼：

I called it a go-back-to-jail-quick scheme

我称之为“快速再次蹲牢计划”，

because really, how long is that going to last?

因为真的，这种行当到底能持续多久？

You get a retirement plan with that?

会提供给你一个“退休方案”吗？

Nice little pension? 401(k)? 403(b)?

合理的退休金？401(K)?403(b)? (美国退休福利计划)

You get health insurance? Dental?

你能得到健康保险吗？包括牙科？

(Laughter)

（笑声）

But I will tell you this:

但是我要告诉你们：

Being in jail and being in prison,

在坐牢期间，

我遇到了一些我曾见过的最聪明，

I came across some of the most intelligent, brilliant,

and talented people that I would ever meet.

最有才能的人。

I've seen individuals take a potato chip bag

我看到一些人把薯片袋

and turn it into the most beautiful picture frame.

变成最漂亮的画框。

I've seen individuals take the state soap that's provided for free

我看到过一些人把免费的肥皂

and turn them into the most beautiful sculptures

变成最美的雕刻作品，

that would make Michelangelo look like a kindergartner made it.

这让米开朗基罗的作品 看上去都像涂鸦。

At the age of 21, I was in a maximum-security prison

21岁的时候， 我在一个安全级别最高的监狱，

called Elmira Correctional Facility.

叫做埃尔迈拉监狱。

I just came out of the weight shack from working out,

我刚结束了户外义务劳动，

and I saw an older gentleman that I knew standing in the middle of the yard

看到我认识的一个老人 站在院子的中间，

一直在仰望天空。

just looking up at the sky.

Mind you, this older gentlemen was serving a 33-and-a-third-to-life sentence

跟你们说，这个老人的刑期长达33年， 相当于三分之一的寿命，

in which he already had served 20 years of that sentence.

他已经服了20年的刑。

So I walk up to him and I said,

我走到他跟前，说，

"O.G., what's going on, man, you good?"

“哦天啊，怎么了，你还好吧？”

He looked at me, and he said, "Yeah, I'm good, young blood."

他看着我，说， ”是的，我很好，年轻人。“

I'm like, "So what are you looking up at the sky for, man?

我说，”那你老盯着天空干什么呢？

有什么好看的东西吗？”

What's so fascinating up there?"

他说，“你向上看， 你告诉我看到了什么。”

He said, "You look up and you tell me what you see."

"Clouds." (Laughter)

“云。”（笑声）

He said, "All right. What else do you see?"

他说，“好吧。还看到什么？”

At that time, it was a plane passing by.

那时，有架飞机飞过。

I said, "All right, I see an airplane."

我说，“好吧，我看到一架飞机。”

He said, "Exactly, and what's on that airplane?" "People."

他说，“确实，飞机上有什么？” “人。”

"Exactly. Now where's that plane and those people going?"

“对的。那架飞机和那些人要去哪里？”

"I don't know. You know?

“我不知道。你知道？

Please let me know if you do. Then let me get some lottery numbers."

如果知道请告诉我。我好去买彩票。”

He said, "You're missing the big picture, young blood.

他说，”年轻人，你错过了一幅大图景。

That plane with those people is going somewhere,

飞机上的人们飞向某个地方，

while we're here stuck.

然而我们却困在这里。

The big picture is this:

大图景是这样的：

That plane with those people going somewhere,

飞机上的人们飞向了什么地方，

that's life passing us by while we behind these walls, stuck."

生活从我们头顶飞过去了， 而我们却困在了这些墙里面。”

Ever since that day,

从那天以后，

that sparked something in my mind and made me know I had to make a change.

我脑海里突然有东西闪现， 让我知道我要做出改变。

Growing up, I was always a good, smart kid.

长大后，我一直是聪明的好孩子。

Some people would say I was a little too smart for my own good.

有些人说我有点太自作聪明了。

I had dreams of becoming an architect or an archaeologist.

我梦想成为建筑师或者考古学家。

Currently, I'm working at the Fortune Society,

目前，我正在“财富社区”工作，

which is a reentry program,

这是个重返社会的项目，

and I work with people as a case manager that are at high risk for recidivism.

我作为项目经理 跟那些有很高再犯风险的人一起工作。

So I connect them with the services that they need

所以我把他们 与那些他们需要的服务相联系，

一旦他们从监狱释放，

once they're released from jail and prison

so they can make a positive transition back into society.

他们就可以做出正面的改变，重返社会。

If I was to see my 15-year-old self today,

如果我今天可以看见15岁的自己，

I would sit down and talk to him and try to educate him

我会坐下来跟他说话，尝试教育他，

and I would let him know, "Listen, this is me. I'm you.

我会让他知道， “听着，这是你，我就是你。

This is us. We are one.

这是我们，我们是一体。

Everything that you're about to do, I know what you're gonna do

你将要做的每件事，在你做之前，

before you do it because I already did it,

我都知道，因为我都做过了，

and I would encourage him not to hang out with x, y and z people.

我会鼓励他，不要跟张三,李四, 或者王五这些人出去。

I would tell him not to be in such-and-such place.

我会告诉他不要去 这样或者那样的地方。

I would tell him, keep your behind in school, man,

我会告诉他，待在学校，

because that's where you need to be,

那是才你该待的地方，

because that's what's going to get you somewhere in life.

因为那才会给你的生活带来前程。

This is the message that we should be sharing

这就是我们应该要与

with our young men and young women.

少年男女们分享的信息，

We shouldn't be treating them as adults and putting them in cultures of violence

我们不该把他们当做成年人， 把他们置于

几乎不可能逃避的暴力文化中。

that are nearly impossible for them to escape.

Thank you.

谢谢。

(Applause)

（掌声）