Ismael Nazario: What I learned as a kid in jail

193,285 views ・ 2015-03-11

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We need to change the culture in our jails and prisons,
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especially for young inmates.
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New York state is one of only two in the U.S.
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that automatically arrests and tries 16- to 17-year-olds as adults.
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This culture of violence takes these young people
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and puts them in a hostile environment,
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and the correctional officers pretty much allow any and everything to go on.
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There's not really much for these young people to do
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to actually enhance their talent and actually rehabilitate them.
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Until we can raise the age of criminal responsibility to 18,
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we need to focus on changing the daily lives of these young people.
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I know firsthand.
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Before I ever turned 18,
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I spent approximately 400 days on Rikers Island,
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and to add to that
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I spent almost 300 days in solitary confinement,
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and let me tell you this:
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Screaming at the top of your lungs all day on your cell door
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or screaming at the top of your lungs out the window,
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it gets tiring.
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Since there's not much for you to do while you're in there,
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you start pacing back and forth in your cell,
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you start talking to yourself,
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your thoughts start running wild,
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and then your thoughts become your own worst enemy.
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Jails are actually supposed to rehabilitate a person,
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not cause him or her to become more angry,
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frustrated, and feel more hopeless.
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Since there's not a discharge plan put in place for these young people,
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they pretty much reenter society with nothing.
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And there's not really much for them to do to keep them from recidivating.
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But it all starts with the C.O.s.
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It's very easy for some people
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to look at these correctional officers as the good guys
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and the inmates as the bad guys,
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or vice versa for some,
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but it's a little more than that.
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See, these C.O.s are normal, everyday people.
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They come from the same neighborhoods as the population they "serve."
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They're just normal people.
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They're not robots, and there's nothing special about them.
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They do pretty much everything anybody else in society does.
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The male C.O.s want to talk and flirt with the female C.O.s.
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They play the little high school kid games with each other.
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They politic with one another.
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And the female C.O.s gossip to each other.
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So I spent numerous amounts of time with numerous amounts of C.O.s,
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and let me tell you about this one in particular named Monroe.
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One day he pulled me in between the A and B doors
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which separate the north and south sides of our housing unit.
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He pulled me there because I had a physical altercation
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with another young man in my housing unit,
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and he felt, since there was a female officer working on the floor,
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that I violated his shift.
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So he punched me in my chest.
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He kind of knocked the wind out of me.
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I wasn't impulsive, I didn't react right away,
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because I know this is their house.
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I have no wins.
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All he has to do is pull his pin and backup will come immediately.
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So I just gave him a look in his eyes
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and I guess he saw the anger and frustration just burning,
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and he said to me,
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"Your eyes are going to get you in a lot of trouble,
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because you're looking like you want to fight."
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So he commenced to taking off his utility belt,
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he took off his shirt and his badge,
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and he said, "We could fight."
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So I asked him, "You gonna hold it down?"
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Now, that's a term that's commonly used on Rikers Island
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meaning that you're not going to say anything to anybody,
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and you're not going to report it.
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He said, "Yeah, I'm gonna hold it down. You gonna hold it down?"
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I didn't even respond.
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I just punched him right in his face,
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and we began fighting right then and there.
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Towards the end of the fight, he slammed me up against the wall,
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so while we were tussled up, he said to me, "You good?"
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as if he got the best of me,
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but in my mind, I know I got the best of him,
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so I replied very cocky,
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"Oh, I'm good, you good?"
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He said, "Yeah, I'm good, I'm good."
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We let go, he shook my hand, said he gave me my respect,
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gave me a cigarette and sent me on my way.
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Believe it or not, you come across some C.O.s on Rikers Island
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that'll fight you one-on-one.
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They feel that they understand how it is,
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and they feel that I'm going to meet you where you're at.
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Since this is how you commonly handle your disputes,
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we can handle it in that manner.
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I walk away from it like a man, you walk away from it like a man,
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and that's it.
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Some C.O.s feel that they're jailing with you.
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This is why they have that mentality and that attitude
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and they go by that concept.
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In some instances, we're in it together with the C.O.s.
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However, institutions need to give these correctional officers
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proper trainings on how to properly deal with the adolescent population,
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and they also need to give them proper trainings
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on how to deal with the mental health population as well.
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These C.O.s play a big factor in these young people's lives
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for x amount of time until a disposition is reached on their case.
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So why not try to mentor these young people while they're there?
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Why not try to give them some type of insight to make a change,
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so once they reenter back into society,
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they're doing something positive?
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A second big thing to help our teens in jails is better programming.
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When I was on Rikers Island, the huge thing was solitary confinement.
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Solitary confinement was originally designed
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to break a person mentally, physically and emotionally.
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That's what it was designed for.
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The U.S. Attorney General recently released a report
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stating that they're going to ban solitary confinement
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in New York state for teens.
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One thing that kept me sane while I was in solitary confinement was reading.
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I tried to educate myself as much as possible.
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I read any and everything I could get my hands on.
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And aside from that, I wrote music and short stories.
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Some programs that I feel would benefit our young people
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are art therapy programs
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for the kids that like to draw and have that talent,
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and what about the young individuals that are musically inclined?
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How about a music program for them that actually teaches them
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how to write and make music?
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Just a thought.
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When adolescents come to Rikers Island,
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C74, RNDC is the building that they're housed in.
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That's nicknamed "gladiator school,"
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because you have a young individual coming in from the street
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thinking that they're tough,
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being surrounded by a bunch of other young individuals
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from all of the five boroughs, and everybody feels that they're tough.
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So now you have a bunch of young gentlemen poking their chests out
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feeling that I have to prove I'm equally as tough as you
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or I'm tougher than you, you and you.
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But let's be honest:
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That culture is very dangerous and damaging to our young people.
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We need to help institutions and these teens realize
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that they don't have to lead the previous lifestyle that they led
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when they were on the street, that they can actually make a change.
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It's sad to report that while I was in prison,
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I used to hear dudes talking about when they get released from prison,
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what type of crimes they're going to commit
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when they get back in the street.
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The conversations used to sound something like this:
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"Oh, when I hit the street, my brother got this connection
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for this, that and the third,"
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or, "My man over here got this connection for the low price.
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Let's exchange information,"
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and, "When we hit the town, we're going to do it real big."
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I used to hear these conversations and think to myself, "Wow,
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these dudes are really talking about going back in the street
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and committing future crimes."
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So I came up with a name for that:
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I called it a go-back-to-jail-quick scheme
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because really, how long is that going to last?
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You get a retirement plan with that?
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Nice little pension? 401(k)? 403(b)?
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You get health insurance? Dental?
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(Laughter)
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But I will tell you this:
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Being in jail and being in prison,
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I came across some of the most intelligent, brilliant,
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and talented people that I would ever meet.
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I've seen individuals take a potato chip bag
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and turn it into the most beautiful picture frame.
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I've seen individuals take the state soap that's provided for free
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and turn them into the most beautiful sculptures
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that would make Michelangelo look like a kindergartner made it.
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At the age of 21, I was in a maximum-security prison
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called Elmira Correctional Facility.
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I just came out of the weight shack from working out,
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and I saw an older gentleman that I knew standing in the middle of the yard
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just looking up at the sky.
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Mind you, this older gentlemen was serving a 33-and-a-third-to-life sentence
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in which he already had served 20 years of that sentence.
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So I walk up to him and I said,
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"O.G., what's going on, man, you good?"
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He looked at me, and he said, "Yeah, I'm good, young blood."
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I'm like, "So what are you looking up at the sky for, man?
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What's so fascinating up there?"
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He said, "You look up and you tell me what you see."
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"Clouds." (Laughter)
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He said, "All right. What else do you see?"
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At that time, it was a plane passing by.
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I said, "All right, I see an airplane."
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He said, "Exactly, and what's on that airplane?" "People."
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"Exactly. Now where's that plane and those people going?"
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"I don't know. You know?
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Please let me know if you do. Then let me get some lottery numbers."
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He said, "You're missing the big picture, young blood.
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That plane with those people is going somewhere,
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while we're here stuck.
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The big picture is this:
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That plane with those people going somewhere,
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that's life passing us by while we behind these walls, stuck."
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Ever since that day,
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that sparked something in my mind and made me know I had to make a change.
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Growing up, I was always a good, smart kid.
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Some people would say I was a little too smart for my own good.
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I had dreams of becoming an architect or an archaeologist.
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Currently, I'm working at the Fortune Society,
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which is a reentry program,
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and I work with people as a case manager that are at high risk for recidivism.
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So I connect them with the services that they need
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once they're released from jail and prison
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so they can make a positive transition back into society.
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If I was to see my 15-year-old self today,
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I would sit down and talk to him and try to educate him
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and I would let him know, "Listen, this is me. I'm you.
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This is us. We are one.
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Everything that you're about to do, I know what you're gonna do
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before you do it because I already did it,
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and I would encourage him not to hang out with x, y and z people.
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I would tell him not to be in such-and-such place.
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I would tell him, keep your behind in school, man,
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because that's where you need to be,
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because that's what's going to get you somewhere in life.
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This is the message that we should be sharing
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with our young men and young women.
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We shouldn't be treating them as adults and putting them in cultures of violence
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that are nearly impossible for them to escape.
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Thank you.
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(Applause)
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