Depression, the secret we share | Andrew Solomon

6,051,286 views ใƒป 2013-12-18

TED


์•„๋ž˜ ์˜๋ฌธ์ž๋ง‰์„ ๋”๋ธ”ํด๋ฆญํ•˜์‹œ๋ฉด ์˜์ƒ์ด ์žฌ์ƒ๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.

๋ฒˆ์—ญ: K Bang ๊ฒ€ํ† : June Kim
00:15
"I felt a Funeral, in my Brain,
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"๋จธ๋ฆฟ์†์œผ๋กœ ํ•œ ์žฅ๋ก€ ํ–‰๋ ฌ์ด ์ง€๋‚˜๊ฐ€๋„ค.
00:19
and Mourners to and fro
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์• ๋„์ž๋“ค์€ ์ด๋ฆฌ์ €๋ฆฌ
00:22
kept treading -- treading -- till [it seemed]
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๊ฑท๊ณ  ๊ฑธ์–ด ๋งˆ์นจ๋‚ด
๋‹ค๋ฆฌ์— ์•„๋ฌด ๊ฐ๊ฐ๋„ ์—†์–ด์ง„ ๋“ฏํ•  ๋•Œ๊นŒ์ง€.
00:25
that Sense was breaking through --
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00:27
And when they all were seated,
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ํ•˜์—ฌ ๊ทธ๋“ค ๋ชจ๋‘ ์•‰์œผ๋ฉด
00:29
a Service, like a Drum --
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์˜ˆ๋ฐฐ์˜ ๊ณก์€ ๋งˆ์น˜ ๋ถ์ฒ˜๋Ÿผ
00:31
kept beating -- beating -- till I [thought]
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๋‘๋“œ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ๋‘๋“œ๋ฆฌ๋‹ค ๋งˆ์นจ๋‚ด
๋‚ด ์ •์‹ ์€ ๋งˆ๋น„๋˜๋Š”๊ตฌ๋‚˜ ์ƒ๊ฐ๋  ๋•Œ๊นŒ์ง€.
00:35
my Mind was going numb --
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00:37
And then I heard them lift a Box and creak across my Soul
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์ด์œฝ๊ณ  ๋‚œ ๋“ค์—ˆ๋„ค, ์ €๋“ค์ด ๋‚ฉ์˜ ๋ฌด๊ฑฐ์šด ๋ฐœ๊ธธ๋กœ
๋˜๋‹ค์‹œ, ๊ด€์„ ๋“ค์–ด์˜ฌ๋ ค
00:41
with those same Boots of Lead, again,
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๋‚ด ์˜ํ˜ผ์„ ์ง€๋‚˜๋ฉฐ ์‚๊ฑฑ์ด๋Š” ์†Œ๋ฆฌ๋ฅผ.
00:45
then Space -- began to toll,
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๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ์ž ํ—ˆ๊ณต์€ ์šธ๋ฆฌ๊ธฐ ์‹œ์ž‘ํ–ˆ๋„ค,
00:48
As [all] the Heavens were a Bell, and Being, [but] an Ear,
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ํ•˜๋Š˜์ด ์˜จํ†ต ํ•˜๋‚˜์˜ ํฐ ์ข…์ธ๋“ฏ.
๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์กด์žฌ๋ž€, ๊ท€๋ฟ์ธ ๋“ฏ
00:52
and I, and Silence, some strange Race,
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ํ•˜์—ฌ ๋‚˜์™€, ์นจ๋ฌต, ์ข€ ์ด์ƒํ•œ ์กฑ์†์€
00:55
wrecked, solitary, here --
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๋‚œํŒŒํ–ˆ๋„ค, ํ™€๋กœ ์—ฌ๊ธฐ์„œ.
00:58
[And] then a Plank in Reason, broke,
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ํ•˜์—ฌ ์ด์„ฑ์˜ ํŒ์ž๋Š” ๋ถ€์„œ์ ธ
01:01
and I fell down and down --
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๋‚œ ๋„˜์–ด์ง€๊ณ , ๋„˜์–ด์ ธ.
01:05
and hit a World, at every plunge,
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ํ•˜์—ฌ ๋„˜์–ด์งˆ ๋•Œ๋งˆ๋‹ค ์„ธ๊ณ„์™€ ๋ถ€๋”ช์น˜๊ณ 
01:07
and Finished knowing -- then --"
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์ด์œฝ๊ณ  ๋ง๊ฐํ•˜์˜€๋„ค."
01:12
We know depression through metaphors.
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ์€์œ ๋ฅผ ํ†ตํ•ด ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์„ ์ ‘ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:15
Emily Dickinson was able to convey it in language,
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์—๋ฐ€๋ฆฌ ๋””ํ‚จ์Šจ์€ ์–ธ์–ด๋กœ ํ‘œํ˜„ํ–ˆ๊ณ ,
01:19
Goya in an image.
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๊ณ ์•ผ๋Š” ๊ทธ๋ฆผ์œผ๋กœ ๋‚˜ํƒ€๋ƒˆ์ฃ .
01:22
Half the purpose of art is to describe such iconic states.
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์˜ˆ์ˆ ์˜ ๋ชฉ์  ์ค‘ ์ ˆ๋ฐ˜์€
์ด๋Ÿฐ ์ƒ์ง•์ ์ธ ์ƒํƒœ๋ฅผ ๋ฌ˜์‚ฌํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:27
As for me, I had always thought myself tough,
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์ „ ํ•ญ์ƒ ์ € ์ž์‹ ์ด ๊ฐ•ํ•˜๋‹ค๊ณ  ์ƒ๊ฐํ–ˆ์–ด์š”.
01:31
one of the people who could survive
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๊ฐ•์ œ ์ˆ˜์šฉ์†Œ์—์„œ๋„ ์‚ด์•„๋‚จ์„
01:33
if I'd been sent to a concentration camp.
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์ธ๊ฐ„์ด๋ผ๊ณ  ์ƒ๊ฐํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:36
In 1991, I had a series of losses.
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1991๋…„, ์ „ ๋งŽ์€ ํ—ค์–ด์ง์„ ๊ฒช์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:39
My mother died,
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์–ด๋จธ๋‹ˆ๊ฐ€ ๋Œ์•„๊ฐ€์…จ๊ณ ,
01:41
a relationship I'd been in ended,
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์—ฐ์ธ๊ณผ๋„ ํ—ค์–ด์กŒ๊ณ ,
01:43
I moved back to the United States from some years abroad,
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๋ช‡ ๋…„ ๊ฐ„์˜ ์™ธ๊ตญ ์ƒํ™œ์„ ์ ‘๊ณ 
๋ฏธ๊ตญ์œผ๋กœ ๋Œ์•„์™”์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:47
and I got through all of those experiences intact.
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ํ”๋“ค๋ฆผ ์—†์ด ์ž˜ ๊ฒฌ๋ŽŒ๋ƒˆ์–ด์š”.
01:50
But in 1994, three years later,
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๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ๋‚˜ 3๋…„ ํ›„์ธ 1994๋…„
01:53
I found myself losing interest in almost everything.
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๋ชจ๋“  ๊ฒƒ์— ํฅ๋ฏธ๋ฅผ ์žƒ๊ฒŒ ๋˜์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
์ด์ „์— ์ข‹์•„ํ•˜๋˜ ์ผ์„
01:58
I didn't want to do any of the things I had previously wanted to do,
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๋”๋Š” ํ•˜๊ณ  ์‹ถ์ง€ ์•Š์•˜์–ด์š”.
02:01
and I didn't know why.
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์™œ ๊ทธ๋Ÿฐ์ง€๋Š” ๋ชฐ๋ž์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:03
The opposite of depression is not happiness, but vitality.
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์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์˜ ๋ฐ˜๋Œ€๋Š”
ํ–‰๋ณต์ด ์•„๋‹Œ ํ™œ๋ ฅ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
๋‹น์‹œ์˜ ์ œ ๋ชจ์Šต์—์„ 
02:09
And it was vitality
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02:10
that seemed to seep away from me in that moment.
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ํ™œ๊ธฐ๊ฐ€ ์กฐ๊ธˆ์”ฉ ์˜…์–ด์ง€๊ณ  ์žˆ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:14
Everything there was to do seemed like too much work.
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ํ•ด์•ผ ํ•  ์ผ์ด
๋„ˆ๋ฌด ๋งŽ์€ ๊ฒƒ ๊ฐ™์•˜์ฃ .
02:18
I would come home
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์ง‘์— ๋Œ์•„์˜ค๋ฉด
02:20
and I would see the red light flashing on my answering machine,
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์ž๋™ ์‘๋‹ต๊ธฐ์— ๊นœ๋นก์ด๋Š” ๋นจ๊ฐ„ ๋ถˆ์„ ๋ณด๊ณ 
02:23
and instead of being thrilled to hear from my friends,
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์นœ๊ตฌ๋“ค์˜ ์†Œ์‹์— ๊ธฐ๋ปํ•˜๊ธฐ๋ณด๋‹ค
02:25
I would think,
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์ด๋Ÿฐ ์ƒ๊ฐ์„ ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:27
"What a lot of people that is to have to call back."
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"์—ฐ๋ฝํ•ด์ค˜์•ผ ํ•  ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด ์™œ ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋งŽ์€ ๊ฑฐ์•ผ."
02:30
Or I would decide I should have lunch,
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์ ์‹ฌ์„ ๋จน์œผ๋ ค๋ฉด
02:32
and then I would think, but I'd have to get the food out
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๊ฒฐ๊ตญ ์Œ์‹์„ ๊บผ๋‚ด์•ผ ํ•˜๊ณ 
02:35
and put it on a plate
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์ ‘์‹œ์— ๋‹ด์•„์•ผ ํ•˜๋ฉฐ
02:37
and cut it up and chew it and swallow it,
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์ฐ์–ด์„œ ์”น๊ณ  ์‚ผํ‚ค๋Š” ๊ฒŒ
02:41
and it felt to me like the Stations of the Cross.
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์‹ญ์ž๊ฐ€๋ฅผ ์ง€๊ณ  ๊ฑท๋Š” ๋“ฏ ๊ณ ๋˜๊ธฐ๋งŒ ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:45
And one of the things that often gets lost in discussions of depression
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์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์— ๊ด€ํ•ด ์–˜๊ธฐํ•  ๋•Œ
์ข…์ข… ๊ฐ„๊ณผํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์€
02:49
is that you know it's ridiculous.
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๋ณธ์ธ์ด ๊ทธ ํ•œ์‹ฌํ•จ์„ ์•ˆ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:51
You know it's ridiculous while you're experiencing it.
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์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์„ ์•“๋Š” ๋™์•ˆ ๊ทธ๊ฒŒ ์–ผ๋งˆ๋‚˜ ํ•œ์‹ฌํ•œ์ง€ ์ž˜ ์•Œ์•„์š”.
02:54
You know that most people manage
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์™œ๋ƒํ•˜๋ฉด ๋Œ€๋‹ค์ˆ˜ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด
02:56
to listen to their messages and eat lunch
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์•„๋ฌด ๋ฌธ์ œ ์—†์ด ์Œ์„ฑ ๋ฉ”์‹œ์ง€๋ฅผ ๋“ฃ๊ณ 
02:58
and organize themselves to take a shower
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์ ์‹ฌ์„ ๋จน๊ณ , ์ƒค์›Œ๋ฅผ ํ•˜๊ณ 
03:00
and go out the front door
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ํ˜„๊ด€์„ ๋‚˜์„œ๋‹ˆ๊นŒ์š”.
03:02
and that it's not a big deal,
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์ผ์ƒ์ ์ธ ์ผ์ด์ฃ .
03:03
and yet you are nonetheless in its grip
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๊ทธ๋Ÿผ์—๋„ ์ด ์†์•„๊ท€์—์„œ
03:06
and you are unable to figure out any way around it.
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๋น ์ ธ๋‚˜์˜ฌ ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์„ ์ฐพ์ง€ ๋ชปํ•ด ํ—ค๋งค๊ฒŒ ๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:10
And so I began to feel myself doing less
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์ € ๋˜ํ•œ ์‹œ๊ฐ„์ด ์ง€๋‚ ์ˆ˜๋ก ํ–‰๋™์ด ์ค„๊ณ 
03:15
and thinking less
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์ƒ๊ฐ๋„ ์ค„์–ด๋“ค๊ณ 
03:17
and feeling less.
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๊ฐ๊ฐ์ด ๋ฌด๋ŽŒ์กŒ์ฃ .
03:19
It was a kind of nullity.
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๋ฌด๊ฐ๊ฐ ์ƒํƒœ์˜€์–ด์š”.
03:22
And then the anxiety set in.
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ๋ถˆ์•ˆ๊ฐ์ด ์—„์Šตํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:24
If you told me that I'd have to be depressed for the next month,
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๋งŒ์•ฝ ๋ˆ„๊ตฐ๊ฐ€ ์ €์—๊ฒŒ
ํ•œ ๋‹ฌ ๋™์•ˆ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์„ ์•“์œผ๋ผ๊ณ  ํ•˜๋ฉด
03:28
I would say, "As long I know it'll be over in November, I can do it."
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"11์›”์— ๋๋‚˜๊ธฐ๋ฉด ํ•˜๋ฉด ๊ดœ์ฐฎ์•„์š”" ๋ผ๊ณ  ๋‹ตํ•  ๊ฒ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:31
But if you said to me,
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๊ทธ๋Ÿฐ๋ฐ ๋งŒ์•ฝ
03:32
"You have to have acute anxiety for the next month,"
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"ํ•œ ๋‹ฌ ๊ฐ„ ๊ทน๋„์˜ ๋ถˆ์•ˆ๊ฐ์„ ๋Š๊ปด์•ผ ํ•œ๋‹ค"๊ณ  ํ•œ๋‹ค๋ฉด
์ฐจ๋ผ๋ฆฌ ์†๋ชฉ์„ ๊ธ‹๊ฒ ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:36
I would rather slit my wrist than go through it.
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03:38
It was the feeling all the time
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๋Š˜ ๋ถˆ์•ˆํ•œ ์ด ๋Š๋‚Œ์€
03:40
like that feeling you have if you're walking
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๋งˆ์น˜ ๊ธธ์„ ๊ฑท๋‹ค๊ฐ€
03:42
and you slip or trip and the ground is rushing up at you,
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๋ฏธ๋„๋Ÿฌ์ง€๊ฑฐ๋‚˜ ๋„˜์–ด์ ธ์„œ
๋•…์ด ๋‚˜๋ฅผ ์‚ผํ‚ฌ ๊ฒƒ ๊ฐ™์€ ๊ธฐ๋ถ„์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:45
but instead of lasting half a second, the way that does,
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์ด๋Ÿฐ ๊ธฐ๋ถ„์ด ์Šค์ณ์ง€๋‚˜๋Š” ๊ฒŒ ์•„๋‹ˆ๋ผ
03:48
it lasted for six months.
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6๊ฐœ์›”๊ฐ„ ๊ณ„์†๋˜์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:50
It's a sensation of being afraid all the time
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๋Š˜ ๋‘๋ ค์›€์— ๋–จ๋ฉด์„œ๋„
03:53
but not even knowing what it is that you're afraid of.
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์ •์ž‘ ๋ฌด์—‡์ด ๋ฌด์„œ์šด์ง€ ์•Œ์ง€ ๋ชปํ•˜๋Š” ๊ธฐ๋ถ„์ด์ฃ .
03:57
And it was at that point that I began to think
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ๊ทธ๋•Œ๋ถ€ํ„ฐ๋Š”
03:59
that it was just too painful to be alive,
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์‚ด์•„์žˆ๋Š” ๊ฒŒ ๋„ˆ๋ฌด ๊ณ ํ†ต์Šค๋Ÿฝ๋‹ค๋Š” ์ƒ๊ฐ์„ ํ•˜๊ฒŒ ๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:03
and that the only reason not to kill oneself
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์ž์‚ด์„ ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š๋Š” ์œ ์ผํ•œ ์ด์œ ๋Š”
04:06
was so as not to hurt other people.
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์ฃผ๋ณ€ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ์ƒ์ฒ˜ ์ฃผ์ง€ ์•Š๊ธฐ ์œ„ํ•ด์„œ์˜€์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:09
And finally one day, I woke up
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์–ด๋Š ๋‚ ์ธ๊ฐ€ ์ž ์—์„œ ๊นจ์–ด
04:12
and I thought perhaps I'd had a stroke,
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๋‡Œ์กธ์ค‘์ด ์•„๋‹Œ์ง€ ์˜์‹ฌํ•œ ์ ์ด ์žˆ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:14
because I lay in bed completely frozen,
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์นจ๋Œ€์— ๊ผผ์ง์—†์ด ๋ˆ„์šด ์ฑ„๋กœ
04:16
looking at the telephone, thinking,
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์ „ํ™”๊ธฐ๋ฅผ ๋ฐ”๋ผ๋ณด๋ฉด์„œ
04:18
"Something is wrong and I should call for help,"
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"๋ญ”๊ฐ€ ์ž˜๋ชป๋์–ด, ๋„์›€์ด ํ•„์š”ํ•ด." ๋ผ๊ณ  ์ƒ๊ฐํ–ˆ์ง€๋งŒ
04:22
and I couldn't reach out my arm
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์ „ํ™”๊ธฐ๋กœ ํŒ”์„ ๋ป—์–ด
04:24
and pick up the phone and dial.
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๋ฒˆํ˜ธ๋ฅผ ๋ˆ„๋ฅผ ์ˆ˜๊ฐ€ ์—†์—ˆ๊ฑฐ๋“ ์š”.
04:26
And finally, after four full hours of my lying and staring at it,
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4์‹œ๊ฐ„ ๋™์•ˆ ๋ˆ„์›Œ์„œ ์ „ํ™”๊ธฐ๋ฅผ ๋ฐ”๋ผ๋งŒ ๋ณด์•˜์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:30
the phone rang,
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๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ๋‹ค ์ „ํ™”๊ฐ€ ์šธ๋ ธ๊ณ 
04:32
and somehow I managed to pick it up,
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๊ฒจ์šฐ ์ง‘์–ด๋“ค์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:34
and it was my father, and I said,
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์•„๋ฒ„์ง€์˜€์–ด์š”.
"์ œ ์ƒํƒœ๊ฐ€ ์‹ฌ๊ฐํ•ด์š”.
04:37
"I'm in serious trouble. We need to do something."
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๋ญ”๊ฐ€ ์กฐ์น˜๋ฅผ ์ทจํ•ด์•ผ ํ•ด์š”." ๋ผ๊ณ  ํ–ˆ์ฃ .
04:41
The next day I started with the medications and the therapy.
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๋‹ค์Œ ๋‚ ๋ถ€ํ„ฐ ์•ฝ์„ ๋จน๊ณ 
์น˜๋ฃŒ๋ฅผ ๋ฐ›๊ธฐ ์‹œ์ž‘ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:47
And I also started reckoning with this terrible question:
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์Šค์Šค๋กœ ์ด๋Ÿฐ ๋”์ฐํ•œ ์ƒ๊ฐ์„
ํ•˜๊ธฐ๋„ ํ–ˆ๊ณ ์š”.
04:51
If I'm not the tough person
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๋งŒ์•ฝ ๋‚ด๊ฐ€ ๊ฐ•์ œ ์ˆ˜์šฉ์†Œ์—์„œ
04:53
who could have made it through a concentration camp,
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์‚ด์•„๋‚จ์ง€ ๋ชปํ•œ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด๋ผ๋ฉด
04:56
then who am I?
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๋„๋Œ€์ฒด ๋‚˜๋Š” ๋ˆ„๊ตฌ์ธ๊ฐ€?
04:57
And if I have to take medication,
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์•ฝ์„ ๋จน์–ด์•ผ ํ•œ๋‹ค๋ฉด
04:59
is that medication making me more fully myself,
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์™„์ „ํžˆ ๋‚˜๋‹ค์šด ๋ชจ์Šต์„ ์ฐพ๊ธฐ ์œ„ํ•ด์„œ์ผ๊นŒ?
05:03
or is it making me someone else?
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์•„๋‹ˆ๋ฉด ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด ๋˜๋Š” ๊ฑธ๊นŒ?
05:05
And how do I feel about it if it's making me someone else?
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๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด ๋œ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฑด
์–ด๋–ค ๊ธฐ๋ถ„์ผ๊นŒ?
์ „ ํˆฌ๋ณ‘์„ ์‹œ์ž‘ํ•  ๋•Œ ๋‘ ๊ฐ€์ง€ ์žฅ์ ์„ ๊ฐ–๊ณ  ์žˆ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:10
I had two advantages as I went into the fight.
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05:13
The first is that I knew that, objectively speaking,
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์ฒซ์งธ๋Š”, ๊ฐ๊ด€์ ์œผ๋กœ ๋ณผ ๋•Œ
05:16
I had a nice life,
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์ œ ์ธ์ƒ์ด ๊ดœ์ฐฎ์€ ํŽธ์ด๋ฉฐ
05:17
and that if I could only get well,
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์ผ๋‹จ ๋‚ซ๊ธฐ๋งŒ ํ•œ๋‹ค๋ฉด
05:19
there was something at the other end that was worth living for.
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์ด ๊ธธ์˜ ๋์—๋Š”
์‚ถ์˜ ํฌ๋ง์ด ์žˆ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฑธ ์•Œ์•˜์ฃ .
05:23
And the other was that I had access to good treatment.
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์ €๋Š” ๊ดœ์ฐฎ์€ ์น˜๋ฃŒ๋ฅผ ๋ฐ›์„ ์ˆ˜๋„ ์žˆ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:26
But I nonetheless emerged and relapsed,
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์ข‹์•„์กŒ๋‹ค ๋‚˜๋น ์ง€๊ณ 
05:29
and emerged and relapsed,
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์ข‹์•„์กŒ๋‹ค ๋‚˜๋น ์ง€๊ณ 
05:32
and emerged and relapsed,
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์ข‹์•„์กŒ๋‹ค ๋‚˜๋น ์ง€๋‹ค๊ฐ€
05:35
and finally understood
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๊ฒฐ๊ตญ ํ‰์ƒ๋™์•ˆ
05:37
I would have to be on medication and in therapy forever.
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์•ฝ๊ณผ ์น˜๋ฃŒ์— ์˜์กดํ•  ์ˆ˜๋ฐ–์—
์—†์„ ๊ฑฐ๋ผ ์ƒ๊ฐํ–ˆ์ฃ .
05:41
And I thought,
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๋˜ํ•œ ์ด๊ฒŒ ํ™”ํ•™์ ์ธ ๋ฌธ์ œ์ธ์ง€
05:42
"But is it a chemical problem or a psychological problem?
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์ •์‹ ์ ์ธ ๋ฌธ์ œ์ธ์ง€
05:45
And does it need a chemical cure or a philosophical cure?"
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ํ™”ํ•™์  ์น˜๋ฃŒ๊ฐ€ ์ข‹์„์ง€ ์ฒ ํ•™์  ์ ‘๊ทผ์ด ํ•„์š”ํ•œ์ง€
05:49
And I couldn't figure out which it was.
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์•Œ ์ˆ˜๊ฐ€ ์—†์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:51
And then I understood that actually,
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๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ๋‹ค ๊นจ๋‹ฌ์•˜์–ด์š”.
05:54
we aren't advanced enough in either area for it to explain things fully.
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์™„์ „ํ•œ ๋‹ต์„ ์–ป๊ธฐ์—๋Š”
์•„์ง ์—ฐ๊ตฌ๊ฐ€ ๋” ํ•„์š”ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:58
The chemical cure and the psychological cure
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ํ™”ํ•™์  ์น˜๋ฃŒ, ์ •์‹ ์  ์น˜๋ฃŒ ๋ชจ๋‘
06:01
both have a role to play,
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๊ฐ๊ฐ์˜ ์—ญํ• ์ด ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
06:03
and I also figured out that depression was something
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๋˜ํ•œ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์ด๋ž€ ๋‚ด๋ฉด ๊นŠ์ด ์ž๋ฆฌ ์žก์•„
์šฐ๋ฆฌ์˜ ํŠน์ง•๊ณผ ์„ฑ๊ฒฉ์—์„œ
06:07
that was braided so deep into us
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06:09
that there was no separating it from our character and personality.
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์ด๋ฅผ ๋ถ„๋ฆฌํ•ด๋‚ด๊ธฐ๊ฐ€
์–ด๋ ต๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒƒ๋„ ๊นจ๋‹ฌ์•˜์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
06:13
I want to say that the treatments we have for depression are appalling.
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ํ˜„์žฌ์˜ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ ์น˜๋ฃŒ ์ˆ˜์ค€์€
๋”์ฐํ•  ์ •๋„์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
๋น„ํšจ์œจ์ ์ด์ฃ .
06:18
They're not very effective.
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06:19
They're extremely costly.
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๋น„์‹ธ๊ธฐ๋„ ํ•˜๊ณ ์š”.
06:21
They come with innumerable side effects.
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๋ถ€์ž‘์šฉ๋„ ๋ฌด์ˆ˜ํžˆ ๋งŽ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
06:24
They're a disaster.
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ํ•œ๋งˆ๋””๋กœ ์žฌ์•™์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
๊ทธ๋ž˜๋„ 50๋…„ ์ „๋ณด๋‹ค
06:26
But I am so grateful that I live now and not 50 years ago,
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์ง€๊ธˆ์ด ๋‚ซ๋‹ค๋Š” ์‚ฌ์‹ค์— ๊ฐ์‚ฌํ•˜๊ณ  ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
06:30
when there would have been almost nothing to be done.
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๊ทธ๋•Œ๋Š” ๋„์ €ํžˆ ํฌ๋ง์ด
์—†์—ˆ์œผ๋‹ˆ๊นŒ์š”.
06:33
I hope that 50 years hence,
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50๋…„ ํ›„์—๋Š”
06:36
people will hear about my treatments
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์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด ์ œ ์น˜๋ฃŒ๋ฒ•์„ ์•Œ๋ฉด
๊ทธ๋Ÿฐ ์›์‹œ์ ์ธ ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์ด ์žˆ๋Š๋ƒ๋ฉฐ
06:38
and be appalled that anyone endured such primitive science.
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๋ชน์‹œ ๋†€๋ผ๊ฒ ์ฃ .
06:42
Depression is the flaw in love.
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์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์€ ์‚ฌ๋ž‘์˜ ๊ฒฐํ•จ์—์„œ ๋น„๋กฏ๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
06:47
If you were married to someone and thought,
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๋งŒ์•ฝ ๊ฒฐํ˜ผ์„ ํ–ˆ๋Š”๋ฐ ์ด๋Ÿฐ ์ƒ๊ฐ์„ ํ•˜๋ฉด ์–ด๋–จ๊นŒ์š”?
06:50
"Well, if my wife dies, I'll find another one,"
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"์•„๋‚ด๊ฐ€ ์ฃฝ์œผ๋ฉด ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์—ฌ์ž์™€ ๊ฒฐํ˜ผํ•˜์ง€ ๋ญ."
06:54
it wouldn't be love as we know it.
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๊ทธ๊ฑด ๊ฒฐ์ฝ” ์‚ฌ๋ž‘์ด ์•„๋‹™๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
06:57
There's no such thing as love without the anticipation of loss,
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์ƒ์‹ค์„ ๋‘๋ ค์›Œํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š๋Š”
์‚ฌ๋ž‘์€ ์—†์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:01
and that specter of despair can be the engine of intimacy.
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์ƒ์‹ค์˜ ์ ˆ๋ง์ด๋ผ๋Š” ์œ ๋ น์ด
์‚ฌ๋ž‘์„ ๋ˆ๋…ํ•˜๊ฒŒ ํ•˜๋Š” ๋™๋ ฅ์ด๊ณ ์š”.
07:08
There are three things people tend to confuse:
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์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์€ ๋ณดํ†ต 3๊ฐ€์ง€๋ฅผ ํ˜ผ๋™ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:11
depression, grief and sadness.
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์šฐ์šธ์ฆ, ๋น„์• , ๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์Šฌํ””์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:14
Grief is explicitly reactive.
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๋น„์• ๋Š” ์ฃผ๋ณ€์˜ ์˜ํ–ฅ์„ ๋ฐ›์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:18
If you have a loss and you feel incredibly unhappy,
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๋ˆ„๊ตฐ๊ฐ€๋ฅผ ์žƒ๊ณ  ๋‚˜์„œ ๋น„ํ†ตํ•จ์— ๋น ์กŒ๋”๋ผ๋„
07:21
and then, six months later,
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6๊ฐœ์›”์ด ์ง€๋‚œ ํ›„
07:22
you are still deeply sad, but you're functioning a little better,
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์•„์ง ์Šฌํ””์ด ๊ฐ€์‹œ์ง€๋Š” ์•Š์•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์ „๋ณด๋‹ค๋Š” ๋‚˜์•„์กŒ๋‹ค๋ฉด
์•„๋งˆ ๋น„์• ์ผ ๊ฒ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:26
it's probably grief,
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07:27
and it will probably ultimately resolve itself in some measure.
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ๊ฒฐ๊ตญ์—๋Š” ์ €์ ˆ๋กœ
์–ด๋Š ์ •๋„ ์‚ฌ๋ผ์ง€๊ณ ์š”.
07:31
If you experience a catastrophic loss,
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๋งŒ์•ฝ ์ฒ˜์ฐธํ•œ ์ƒ์‹ค์„ ๊ฒช์—ˆ๊ณ 
07:34
and you feel terrible,
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๋”์ฐํ•œ ๊ธฐ๋ถ„์ธ๋ฐ
07:35
and six months later you can barely function at all,
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6๊ฐœ์›” ํ›„์—๋„ ์ƒํ™œ์ด ๋‚˜์•„์ง€์ง€ ์•Š๋Š”๋‹ค๋ฉด
07:38
then it's probably a depression that was triggered
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ํž˜๋“  ์ƒํ™ฉ์œผ๋กœ ์ธํ•ด ๋ฐœ์ƒํ•œ
์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์ผ ๊ฐ€๋Šฅ์„ฑ์ด ๋†’์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:41
by the catastrophic circumstances.
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07:43
The trajectory tells us a great deal.
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์ด๋Ÿฌํ•œ ๊ตฌ๋ถ„์€ ์‹œ์‚ฌํ•˜๋Š” ๋ฐ”๊ฐ€ ํฝ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:47
People think of depression as being just sadness.
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์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์€ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์ด ๋‹จ์ง€ ์Šฌํ””์ด๋ผ๊ณ  ์ƒ๊ฐํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:50
It's much, much too much sadness,
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์ด๋Š” ๊นŠ๊ณ  ๊นŠ์€ ์Šฌํ””์ด๋ฉฐ,
07:52
much too much grief
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์ปค๋„ ๋„ˆ๋ฌด ํฐ ๋น„์• ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:54
at far too slight a cause.
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์›์ธ์€ ์ฐพ๊ธฐ ํž˜๋“ญ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:57
As I set out to understand depression,
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์ €๋Š” ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์„ ์ดํ•ดํ•˜๊ธฐ ์œ„ํ•œ ์—ฐ๊ตฌ๋ฅผ ์‹œ์ž‘ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค
08:00
and to interview people who had experienced it,
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์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์„ ์•“์•˜๋˜ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์„ ๋งŒ๋‚˜๋ฉฐ
08:02
I found that there were people who seemed, on the surface,
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๊ฒ‰์œผ๋กœ ๋ณด๊ธฐ์—๋Š”
๊ฐ€๋ฒผ์šด ์ฆ์„ธ์˜ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์ธ ๊ฒƒ ๊ฐ™๋”๋ผ๋„
08:06
to have what sounded like relatively mild depression
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์ •์ƒ์ ์ธ ์‚ถ์ด ๋ถˆ๊ฐ€๋Šฅํ•œ
์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค๋„ ์žˆ์Œ์„ ์•Œ๊ฒŒ ๋˜์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:10
who were nonetheless utterly disabled by it.
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08:13
And there were other people who had what sounded
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๋ฐ˜๋ฉด์— ์ž์‹ ์˜ ์ฆ์„ธ๋ฅผ
08:15
as they described it like terribly severe depression
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๊ทน์‹ฌํ•œ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์œผ๋กœ ํ‘œํ˜„ํ•˜๋Š” ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋„
์šฐ์šธํ•จ์„ ๋Š๋ผ์ง€ ๋ชปํ•˜๋Š” ๋™์•ˆ์—๋Š”
08:18
who nonetheless had good lives
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ํ‰๋ฒ”ํ•˜๊ฒŒ ์‚ด์•„๊ฐ€๋Š” ๊ฒฝ์šฐ๋„
08:20
in the interstices between their depressive episodes.
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๋ณผ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:23
And I set out to find out what it is that causes some people
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์ด๋“ค์ด ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์— ๋น„ํ•ด
์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์„ ๋น„๊ต์  ์ž˜ ๊ฒฌ๋””๋Š” ์ด์œ ๋ฅผ
08:27
to be more resilient than other people.
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์ฐพ๊ณ ์ž ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:30
What are the mechanisms that allow people to survive?
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์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด ์ƒ์กดํ•˜๋Š”
์›๋ฆฌ๋Š” ๋ฌด์—‡์ผ๊นŒ?
08:33
And I went out and I interviewed person after person
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์„ ์•“๋Š”
08:36
who was suffering with depression.
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๋งŽ์€ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์„ ๋งŒ๋‚ฌ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:38
One of the first people I interviewed
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์—ฐ๊ตฌ ์ดˆ๊ธฐ ๋‹จ๊ณ„์— ๋งŒ๋‚œ ํ•œ ๋ถ„์€
์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์„ ๋ฌ˜์‚ฌํ•˜๊ธฐ๋ฅผ
08:41
described depression as a slower way of being dead,
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์„œ์„œํžˆ ์ฃฝ์–ด๊ฐ€๋Š” ๊ณผ์ •์ด๋ผ๊ณ  ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:45
and that was a good thing for me to hear early on
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์ด ์ด์•ผ๊ธฐ๋ฅผ ์ดˆ๊ธฐ์— ๋“ค์–ด์„œ ๋‹คํ–‰์ด์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:48
because it reminded me that that slow way of being dead
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์„œ์„œํžˆ ์ฃฝ๋Š” ๊ณผ์ •์ด๋ผ๊ณ  ํ•˜๋”๋ผ๋„
์‹ค์ œ๋กœ ์ฃฝ์Œ์— ์ด๋ฅผ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์„
08:51
can lead to actual deadness,
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์•Œ๊ฒŒ ํ•ด ์ฃผ์—ˆ๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:53
that this is a serious business.
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๊ทธ๊ฑด ์‹ฌ๊ฐํ•œ ๋ฌธ์ œ๊ฑฐ๋“ ์š”.
08:55
It's the leading disability worldwide,
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์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์€ ์ „ ์„ธ๊ณ„์— ๋งŒ์—ฐํ•œ ์ฃผ์š” ์งˆ๋ณ‘ ์ค‘ ํ•˜๋‚˜๋กœ
08:58
and people die of it every day.
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๋งค์ผ ์ด๋กœ ์ธํ•œ ์‚ฌ๋ง์ž๊ฐ€ ๋ฐœ์ƒํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:01
One of the people I talked to when I was trying to understand this
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์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์„ ์ดํ•ดํ•˜๊ธฐ ์œ„ํ•ด
์ธํ„ฐ๋ทฐํ•œ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ ์ค‘์—๋Š”
09:04
was a beloved friend who I had known for many years,
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์ œ๊ฐ€ ์˜ค๋žซ๋™์•ˆ ์•Œ๋˜
์ ˆ์นœํ•œ ์นœ๊ตฌ๋„ ์žˆ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:08
and who had had a psychotic episode in her freshman year of college,
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๋Œ€ํ•™ 1ํ•™๋…„ ๋•Œ
์ •์‹ ์ ์ธ ๋ถˆ์•ˆ์„ ๊ฒช๊ณ 
09:13
and then plummeted into a horrific depression.
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๋”์ฐํ•œ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์— ๋น ์ ธ๋“  ์นœ๊ตฌ์˜€์ฃ .
09:16
She had bipolar illness,
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์–‘๊ทน์„ฑ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์ด๋ผ๊ณ ๋„ ํ•˜๋Š”
09:17
or manic depression, as it was then known.
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์กฐ์šธ์ฆ ์ฆ์„ธ๋„ ๋ณด์˜€๊ณ ์š”.
09:20
And then she did very well for many years on lithium,
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๋ช‡ ๋…„๊ฐ„์€ ๋ฆฌํŠฌ์„ ๋ณต์šฉํ•˜๋ฉฐ
์ž˜ ๊ฒฌ๋””๋Š” ๋“ฏํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ๋‚˜ ๊ฒฐ๊ตญ
09:24
and then eventually, she was taken off her lithium
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๋ฆฌํŠฌ ์˜์กด์„ฑ์„ ํ™•์ธํ•˜๊ธฐ ์œ„ํ•ด
09:27
to see how she would do without it,
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์•ฝ๋ฌผ ๋ณต์šฉ์„ ์ค‘๋‹จํ•˜์ž
09:29
and she had another psychosis,
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๋˜ ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์ •์‹  ๋ถˆ์•ˆ ์ฆ์„ธ๋ฅผ ๋ณด์ด๋ฉฐ
09:31
and then plunged into the worst depression that I had ever seen
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๋” ์‹ฌ๊ฐํ•œ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์— ๋น ์กŒ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
๊ทธ๋Ÿฐ ๊ฑด ์ฒ˜์Œ ๋ดค์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:35
in which she sat in her parents' apartment,
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์ด ์นœ๊ตฌ๋Š” ๋ถ€๋ชจ๋‹˜ ์ง‘์— ์•‰์•„
09:38
more or less catatonic, essentially without moving,
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๊ธด์žฅ์ฆ ์ฆ์„ธ๋กœ ๋ฏธ๋™๋„ ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์€ ์ฑ„
09:41
day after day after day.
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๋‚ ๋งˆ๋‹ค ๊ทธ๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ์•‰์•„ ์žˆ์—ˆ์ฃ .
09:43
And when I interviewed her about that experience some years later --
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๋ช‡ ๋…„ ํ›„์— ์ด ์นœ๊ตฌ๋ฅผ ๋งŒ๋‚˜ ๋‹น์‹œ์˜ ๊ฒฝํ—˜์„ ๋“ฃ๊ฒŒ ๋˜์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:47
she's a poet and psychotherapist named Maggie Robbins --
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ํ˜„์žฌ๋Š” ์‹œ์ธ์ด์ž ์‹ฌ๋ฆฌ์น˜๋ฃŒ์‚ฌ๊ณ ์š”. ์ด๋ฆ„์€ ๋งค๊ธฐ ๋กœ๋นˆ์Šค์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:50
when I interviewed her, she said,
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์ธํ„ฐ๋ทฐ์—์„œ ๋งค๊ธฐ๋Š” ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋งํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:53
"I was singing 'Where Have All The Flowers Gone,'
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"์ง‘์ค‘ํ•  ๊ฑฐ๋ฆฌ๋ฅผ ์ฐพ๊ธฐ ์œ„ํ•ด <๊ฝƒ๋“ค์€ ๋ชจ๋‘ ์–ด๋””๋กœ>๋ฅผ
09:57
over and over, to occupy my mind.
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๋ฐ˜๋ณตํ•ด์„œ ๋ถˆ๋ €์–ด์š”."
10:00
I was singing to blot out the things my mind was saying,
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๋‚ด ๋งˆ์Œ์ด ํ•˜๋Š” ์ด๋Ÿฐ ๋ง์„ ๋“ฃ์ง€ ์•Š๊ธฐ ์œ„ํ•ด์„œ์˜€์ฃ .
10:03
which were, 'You are nothing. You are nobody.
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'๋„Œ ์“ธ๋ชจ ์—†์–ด, ์•„๋ฌด๊ฒƒ๋„ ์•„๋‹ˆ์•ผ.'
'์‚ด ์ž๊ฒฉ์กฐ์ฐจ ์—†์–ด.'
10:08
You don't even deserve to live.'
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10:10
And that was when I really started thinking
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๊ทธ๋•Œ๋ถ€ํ„ฐ ์ž์‚ดํ•  ์ƒ๊ฐ์„
ํ•˜๊ธฐ ์‹œ์ž‘ํ–ˆ์–ด์š”."
10:13
about killing myself."
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10:15
You don't think in depression that you've put on a gray veil
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์ž์‹ ์ด ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ ์ƒํƒœ๋ผ๋ฉด
ํšŒ์ƒ‰ ๋ฒ ์ผ ์†์—์„œ
10:19
and are seeing the world through the haze of a bad mood.
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๋ถ€์ •์  ์ƒ๊ฐ์œผ๋กœ ํ๋ ค์ง„ ๋ˆˆ์„ ํ†ตํ•ด
์„ธ์ƒ์„ ๋ฐ”๋ผ๋ณธ๋‹ค๊ณ  ์ƒ๊ฐํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:23
You think that the veil has been taken away,
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๋ˆˆ์„ ๊ฐ€๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์žˆ๋˜
ํ–‰๋ณต์˜ ๋ฒ ์ผ์ด ๋ฒ—๊ฒจ์ ธ์„œ
10:26
the veil of happiness,
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10:27
and that now you're seeing truly.
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์ง„์งœ ์„ธ์ƒ์„ ๋ณด๊ฒŒ ๋˜์—ˆ๋‹ค๊ณ  ์—ฌ๊ธฐ์ฃ .
10:30
It's easier to help schizophrenics who perceive
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๋‚ด ์•ˆ์— ์žˆ๋Š” ๋˜ ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์ƒ๋ช…์ฒด๋ฅผ
10:33
that there's something foreign inside of them that needs to be exorcised,
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์—†์• ์•ผ ํ•œ๋‹ค๊ณ  ๋ฏฟ๋Š” ์ •์‹ ๋ถ„์—ด์ฆ ํ™˜์ž๋ผ๋ฉด
์˜คํžˆ๋ ค ์น˜๋ฃŒ๊ฐ€ ์‰ฝ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:37
but it's difficult with depressives,
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๊ทธ๋ ‡์ง€๋งŒ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ ํ™˜์ž๋Š” ์ž์‹ ์ด ๋ณด๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ด
10:39
because we believe we are seeing the truth.
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์ง„์‹ค์ด๋ผ ๋ฏฟ๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์— ์น˜๋ฃŒ๊ฐ€ ๋” ์–ด๋ ต์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:43
But the truth lies.
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์ง„์‹ค๋„ ๊ฑฐ์ง“๋ง์„ ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:45
I became obsessed with that sentence:
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์ œ๊ฐ€ ๊ด‘์ ์œผ๋กœ ์ข‹์•„ํ•˜๋Š” ๋ฌธ๊ตฌ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:47
"But the truth lies."
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"์ง„์‹ค๋„ ๊ฑฐ์ง“๋ง์„ ํ•œ๋‹ค."
10:50
And I discovered, as I talked to depressive people,
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์šฐ์šธ์ฆ ํ™˜์ž๋“ค๊ณผ ์ด์•ผ๊ธฐ๋ฅผ ๋‚˜๋ˆ„๋ฉฐ ์•Œ๊ฒŒ ๋œ ๊ฒƒ์€
10:52
that they have many delusional perceptions.
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์ด๋“ค์ด ๋‹ค์–‘ํ•œ ์ฐฉ๊ฐ์— ๋น ์ ธ์žˆ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:55
People will say, "No one loves me."
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๋ˆ„๊ตฐ๊ฐ€ "์•„๋ฌด๋„ ๋‚  ์‚ฌ๋ž‘ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์•„." ๋ผ๊ณ  ๋งํ•œ๋‹ค๋ฉด
10:57
And you say, "I love you,
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์šฐ๋ฆฐ ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•˜์ž–์•„์š”. "๋‚ด๊ฐ€ ์žˆ์ž–์•„."
10:58
your wife loves you, your mother loves you."
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"๋„ค ๋ถ€์ธ๊ณ  ์žˆ๊ณ , ์–ด๋จธ๋‹ˆ๋„ ์žˆ๊ณ ."
11:01
You can answer that one pretty readily, at least for most people.
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์ค€๋น„ํ•œ ๋“ฏ ๋ฐ”๋กœ ๋Œ€๋‹ตํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋Š” ์งˆ๋ฌธ์ด์ฃ .
๋Œ€๋ถ€๋ถ„์˜ ๊ฒฝ์šฐ๋ผ๋ฉด์š”.
ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์„ ์•“๊ณ  ์žˆ๋‹ค๋ฉด ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:05
But people who are depressed will also say,
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11:07
"No matter what we do, we're all just going to die in the end."
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"์šฐ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ๋ญ˜ ํ•˜๋“ 
๊ฒฐ๊ตญ์€ ์ฃฝ๊ฒŒ ๋˜์–ด ์žˆ์–ด."
11:11
Or they'll say, "There can be no true communion
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ํ˜น์€ "์ธ๊ฐ„ ์‚ฌํšŒ์—
11:13
between two human beings.
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์ง„์ •ํ•œ ๊ต๊ฐ์€ ์กด์žฌํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์•„.
11:15
Each of us is trapped in his own body."
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๊ทธ์ € ๊ฐ์ž์˜ ์œก์ฒด์— ๊ฐ‡ํ˜€ ์žˆ์„ ๋ฟ์ด์ง€."
11:17
To which you have to say,
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๊ทธ๋Ÿผ ์ „ ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋‹ตํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:19
"That's true,
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"๋งž์•„์š”.
11:20
but I think we should focus right now on what to have for breakfast."
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์ง€๊ธˆ ๋‹น์žฅ์€
์•„์นจ์œผ๋กœ ๋ญ˜ ๋จน์„์ง€ ์ƒ๊ฐํ•ด ๋ด…์‹œ๋‹ค."
11:24
(Laughter)
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(์›ƒ์Œ)
11:26
A lot of the time,
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๋Œ€๋ถ€๋ถ„์˜ ๊ฒฝ์šฐ
11:28
what they are expressing is not illness, but insight,
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๊ทธ๋“ค์ด ๋ณด์—ฌ์ค€ ๊ฒƒ์€ ์•„ํ””์ด ์•„๋‹Œ ํ†ต์ฐฐ์ด์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:31
and one comes to think what's really extraordinary
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์ •๋ง ๋†€๋ผ์šด ๊ฒƒ์€
11:33
is that most of us know about those existential questions
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ ๋Œ€๋ถ€๋ถ„์€ ์‹ค์กด์— ๋Œ€ํ•œ ๊ณ ๋ฏผ์„ ์•Œ๊ณ  ์žˆ์œผ๋ฉด์„œ๋„
๋ณ„๋กœ ๊ฐœ์˜์น˜ ์•Š๋Š”๋‹ค๋Š” ์‚ฌ์‹ค์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:37
and they don't distract us very much.
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11:39
There was a study I particularly liked
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์ œ๊ฐ€ ๊ฐœ์ธ์ ์œผ๋กœ ์ฐธ ์ข‹์•„ํ•˜๋Š” ์—ฐ๊ตฌ ๊ฒฐ๊ณผ๊ฐ€ ์žˆ๋Š”๋ฐ์š”.
11:41
in which a group of depressed and a group of non-depressed people
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์šฐ์šธ์ฆ ํ™˜์ž ๊ทธ๋ฃน๊ณผ
์ผ๋ฐ˜์ธ ๊ทธ๋ฃน์„ ๋Œ€์ƒ์œผ๋กœ
1์‹œ๊ฐ„๊ฐ€๋Ÿ‰ ๊ฒŒ์ž„์„ ํ•˜๋„๋ก ์‹คํ—˜์„ ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:45
were asked to play a video game for an hour,
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11:47
and at the end of the hour,
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1์‹œ๊ฐ„ ํ›„ ์‹คํ—˜์ด ๋๋‚˜๊ณ 
11:49
they were asked how many little monsters they thought they had killed.
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๊ฒŒ์ž„ ๋„์ค‘ ์–ผ๋งˆ๋‚˜ ๋งŽ์€ ๋ชฌ์Šคํ„ฐ๋ฅผ ์ฃฝ์˜€๋Š”์ง€
๋ฌผ์–ด๋ณด์•˜์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
์šฐ์šธ์ฆ ํ™˜์ž ๊ทธ๋ฃน์€ 10% ์˜ค์ฐจ ๋ฒ”์œ„๋ฅผ ๋ณด์ด๋ฉฐ
11:53
The depressive group was usually accurate to within about 10 percent,
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๋Œ€์ฒด๋กœ ์ •ํ™•ํ•˜๊ฒŒ ๋‹ต๋ณ€ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:57
and the non-depressed people
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๋ฐ˜๋ฉด ์ผ๋ฐ˜์ธ ๊ทธ๋ฃน์€
11:58
guessed between 15 and 20 times as many little monsters --
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15~20๋ฐฐ ๋งŽ์€ ์ˆซ์ž๋ฅผ
๋‚ด๋†“์•˜๊ณ ์š”. (์›ƒ์Œ)
12:03
(Laughter)
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์‹ค์ œ๋กœ ์ฃฝ์ธ ๋ชฌ์Šคํ„ฐ ์ˆซ์ž๋ณด๋‹ค์š”.
12:04
as they had actually killed.
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12:07
A lot of people said, when I chose to write about my depression,
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์ œ๊ฐ€ ๊ฒช์€ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์— ๊ด€ํ•ด ์ฑ…์„ ์“ฐ๊ฒ ๋‹ค๊ณ  ํ•˜์ž
12:11
that it must be very difficult to be out of that closet,
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๋งŽ์€ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด ๊ฑฑ์ •ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
๋งˆ์Œ์„ ์—ด๊ณ  ๊ทธ ์–˜๊ธฐ๋ฅผ ํ•˜๋ ค๋ฉด ๋ชน์‹œ ์–ด๋ ค์šธ ๊ฒƒ์ด๋ผ๊ณ ๋“ค ํ–ˆ์ฃ .
12:14
to have people know.
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์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด ์ ˆ ๋Œ€ํ•˜๋Š” ํƒœ๋„๊ฐ€ ๋‹ฌ๋ผ์กŒ๋Š”์ง€๋„ ๋ฌป๋”๊ตฐ์š”.
12:16
They said, "Do people talk to you differently?"
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12:18
I said, "Yes, people talk to me differently.
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ๋Œ€๋‹ตํ–ˆ์ฃ . "๋„ค, ๋‹ฌ๋ผ์š”."
12:20
They talk to me differently insofar
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์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด ๊ทธ๋“ค์˜ ๊ฒฝํ—˜์„ ๋“ค๋ ค์ฃผ๊ธฐ ์‹œ์ž‘ํ–ˆ๋‹ค๋Š” ์ ์ด
12:22
as they start telling me about their experience,
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๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์ ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
12:24
or their sister's experience,
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์ž๊ธฐ ์—ฌ๋™์ƒ์˜ ์ด์•ผ๊ธฐ๋‚˜
12:26
or their friend's experience.
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์นœ๊ตฌ๋“ค ์ด์•ผ๊ธฐ๋ฅผ ํ•˜๊ธฐ๋„ ํ•˜์ฃ .
12:28
Things are different because now I know
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์ด์   ์ €๋„ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์ด๋ผ๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ด
12:30
that depression is the family secret that everyone has.
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๋ชจ๋“  ๊ฐ€์ •์˜ ์ˆจ๊ฒจ์ง„ ๋น„๋ฐ€์ž„์„
์•Œ๊ฒŒ ๋˜์—ˆ๋‹ค๋Š” ์ ์—์„œ๋„ ๋‹ฌ๋ผ์กŒ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
12:35
I went a few years ago to a conference,
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๋ช‡ ๋…„ ์ „์— ํ•œ ํ•™ํšŒ์— ์ฐธ์„ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
12:39
and on Friday of the three-day conference,
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๊ธˆ์š”์ผ์— ์‹œ์ž‘ํ•˜๋Š” 3์ผ์งœ๋ฆฌ ์ผ์ •์ด์—ˆ์ฃ .
12:41
one of the participants took me aside, and she said,
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์ฐธ๊ฐ€์ž ์ค‘ ํ•œ ๋ช…์ด ์ €๋ฅผ ๋ถˆ๋Ÿฌ๋‚ด์–ด ๋ฌป๋”๊ตฐ์š”.
12:44
"I suffer from depression and I'm a little embarrassed about it,
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"์ €๋„ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์„ ์•“๊ณ  ์žˆ๋Š”๋ฐ
๋‚จ๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•˜๊ธด ์ข€ ์ฐฝํ”ผํ•ด์š”.
๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์–ด๋–ค ์•ฝ์„ ๋จน๊ณ  ์žˆ๋Š”๋ฐ
12:51
but I've been taking this medication,
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12:52
and I just wanted to ask you what you think?"
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์–ด๋–ป๊ฒŒ ์ƒ๊ฐํ•˜์‹œ๋‚˜์š”?"
๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์ตœ์„ ์„ ๋‹คํ•ด ์กฐ์–ธ์„ ํ•ด๋“œ๋ ธ์ฃ .
12:56
And so I did my best to give her such advice as I could.
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12:58
And then she said, "You know, my husband would never understand this.
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๊ทธ๋žฌ๋”๋‹ˆ ์ด๋Ÿฐ ๋ง์”€์„ ํ•˜์‹œ๋”๊ตฐ์š”.
"์ œ ๋‚จํŽธ์€ ์ด๋Ÿฐ ์ƒํ™ฉ์„ ์ ˆ๋Œ€ ์ดํ•ด ๋ชป ํ•ด์š”.
13:03
He's really the kind of guy to whom this wouldn't make any sense,
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๋ง๋„ ์•ˆ ๋˜๋Š” ์ผ์ด๋ผ๊ณ  ์ƒ๊ฐํ•˜๋Š” ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด๊ฑฐ๋“ ์š”.
๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ๋ง์ธ๋ฐ ์ด๊ฑด ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋ผ๋ฆฌ๋งŒ ์•„๋Š” ๊ฑธ๋กœ ํ•ด์š”."
13:06
so, you know, it's just between us."
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13:08
And I said, "Yes, that's fine."
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์•Œ์•˜๋‹ค๊ณ  ํ–ˆ์–ด์š”.
13:10
On Sunday of the same conference,
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์ผ์š”์ผ ์ผ์ •์ด ์‹œ์ž‘๋˜์ž
13:12
her husband took me aside,
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๊ทธ๋ถ„์˜ ๋‚จํŽธ๊ป˜์„œ ์ ˆ ๋ถ€๋ฅด๋”๋‹ˆ
13:14
(Laughter)
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13:15
and he said, "My wife wouldn't think
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"์ œ ์•„๋‚ด๊ฐ€ ์ด ์‚ฌ์‹ค์„ ์•Œ๋ฉด
13:17
that I was really much of a guy if she knew this,
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์ ˆ ๋‚จ์ž๋กœ ๋ณด์ง€ ์•Š๊ฒ ์ง€๋งŒ
13:19
but I've been dealing with this depression and I'm taking some medication,
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์ €๋„ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์„ ์•“๊ณ  ์žˆ๊ฑฐ๋“ ์š”.
๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์ด๋Ÿฐ ์•ฝ์„ ๋จน๋Š”๋ฐ
13:23
and I wondered what you think?"
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์–ด๋–ป๊ฒŒ ์ƒ๊ฐํ•˜์‹ญ๋‹ˆ๊นŒ?"
13:26
They were hiding the same medication
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๋ถ€๋ถ€๊ฐ€ ์„œ๋กœ ๊ฐ™์€ ์•ฝ์„ ๋จน์œผ๋ฉด์„œ
๊ฐ™์€ ์นจ์‹ค์˜ ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ๊ณณ์—
13:28
in two different places in the same bedroom.
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์•ฝ์„ ์ˆจ๊ธฐ๊ณ  ์žˆ์—ˆ์–ด์š”.
13:31
(Laughter)
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์ œ ์ƒ๊ฐ์„ ๋ง์”€๋“œ๋ ธ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
13:33
And I said that I thought communication within the marriage
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๊ฒฐํ˜ผ ์ƒํ™œ์—์„œ๋Š” ์˜์‚ฌ ์†Œํ†ต์ด์•ผ๋ง๋กœ
13:36
might be triggering some of their problems.
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๋ฌธ์ œ ํ•ด๊ฒฐ์˜ ์‹œ์ž‘์ด ๋  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋‹ค๊ณ ์š”.
13:38
(Laughter)
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(์›ƒ์Œ)
13:42
But I was also struck
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ํ•œํŽธ์œผ๋ก  ์„œ๋กœ์—๊ฒŒ ๋ง ๋ชปํ• 
๋น„๋ฐ€์ด ์žˆ๋‹ค๋Š” ์‚ฌ์‹ค์ด ๋ชน์‹œ ๋ฒ„๊ฒ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒƒ๋„
13:44
by the burdensome nature of such mutual secrecy.
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๊นจ๋‹ซ๊ฒŒ ๋˜์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
13:48
Depression is so exhausting.
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์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์€ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์„ ์ง€์น˜๊ฒŒ ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
13:50
It takes up so much of your time and energy,
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์—„์ฒญ๋‚œ ์‹œ๊ฐ„๊ณผ ์—๋„ˆ์ง€ ์†Œ๋ชจ๋Š” ๋ฌผ๋ก 
13:52
and silence about it,
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์นจ๋ฌต์„ ์ง€์ผœ์•ผ ํ•˜๋‹ˆ๊นŒ์š”.
13:54
it really does make the depression worse.
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๊ทธ๊ฒŒ ๋ฐ”๋กœ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์„ ๋”์šฑ ์•…ํ™”์‹œํ‚ต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
13:57
And then I began thinking
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๊ทธ ํ›„, ์ €๋Š” ์Šค์Šค๋กœ ํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋Š” ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•๋“ค์„
13:58
about all the ways people make themselves better.
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๊ณ ๋ฏผํ•˜๊ธฐ ์‹œ์ž‘ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
14:00
I'd started off as a medical conservative.
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์šฐ์„  ๋ณด์กด ์น˜๋ฃŒ๋ฒ•์œผ๋กœ ์‹œ์ž‘ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
14:03
I thought there were a few kinds of therapy that worked,
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๋ช‡ ๊ฐ€์ง€ ์น˜๋ฃŒ๋ฒ•์—์„œ ํšจ๊ณผ๋ฅผ ๋ณด๊ธฐ๋„ ํ–ˆ๊ณ ์š”.
14:05
it was clear what they were --
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์ตํžˆ ์•Œ๋ ค์ง„ ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•๋Œ€๋กœ
14:07
there was medication,
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์•ฝ๋ฌผ ์น˜๋ฃŒ๋‚˜
14:08
there were certain psychotherapies,
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์‹ฌ๋ฆฌ ์ƒ๋‹ด์ด ๊ทธ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
14:10
there was possibly electroconvulsive treatment,
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์ „๊ธฐ ์น˜๋ฃŒ๋ฒ•๋„ ๊ทธ์ค‘ ํ•˜๋‚˜๊ณ ์š”.
ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ๊ทธ ์™ธ์—๋Š” ์ „ํ˜€ ์†Œ์šฉ์ด ์—†์—ˆ์ฃ .
14:13
and that everything else was nonsense.
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14:15
But then I discovered something.
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ๋ญ”๊ฐ€ ๊นจ๋‹ซ๊ฒŒ ๋˜์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
14:17
If you have brain cancer,
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๋‡Œ์ข…์–‘์— ๊ฑธ๋ฆฐ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด
14:19
and you say that standing on your head for 20 minutes every morning
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๋งค์ผ ์•„์นจ 20๋ถ„๊ฐ„ ๋ฌผ๊ตฌ๋‚˜๋ฌด๋ฅผ ์„œ๋ฉด
๊ธฐ๋ถ„์ด ์ข‹์•„์ง„๋‹ค๊ณ  ๊ฐ€์ •ํ•ด ๋ณด์ฃ .
14:22
makes you feel better,
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14:23
it may make you feel better, but you still have brain cancer,
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๋ฌผ๋ก  ๊ทธ๋Ÿด ์ˆ˜๋„ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ๋‡Œ์ข…์–‘์ด ์‚ฌ๋ผ์ง„ ๊ฑด ์•„๋‹ˆ์ž–์•„์š”.
14:26
and you'll still probably die from it.
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๊ทธ๋กœ ์ธํ•ด ์ฃฝ๋Š”๋‹ค๋Š” ์‚ฌ์‹ค๋„ ๋ณ€ํ•จ์ด ์—†๊ฒ ์ฃ .
14:29
But if you say that you have depression,
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์— ๊ฑธ๋ฆฐ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด
14:31
and standing on your head for 20 minutes every day
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๋งค์ผ 20๋ถ„๊ฐ„ ๋ฌผ๊ตฌ๋‚˜๋ฌด๋ฅผ ์„œ์„œ ๊ธฐ๋ถ„์ด ์ข‹์•„์ง„๋‹ค๋ฉด
์ด ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์ด ๊ทธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์—๊ฒ ํšจ๊ณผ๊ฐ€ ์žˆ๋Š” ๊ฒ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
14:34
makes you feel better, then it's worked,
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14:36
because depression is an illness of how you feel,
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์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์ด๋ž€ ๊ฐ์ •์˜ ์งˆ๋ณ‘์ด๋‹ˆ๊นŒ์š”.
14:38
and if you feel better,
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๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ๋‹ˆ ๊ธฐ๋ถ„์ด ์ข‹์•„์ง„๋‹ค๋ฉด
14:40
then you are effectively not depressed anymore.
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์šฐ์šธํ•จ์€ ์‚ฌ๋ผ์ง€๋Š” ๊ฒ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์ €๋„ ๋‹ค์–‘ํ•œ ๋ฏผ๊ฐ„์š”๋ฒ•์—
14:43
So I became much more tolerant
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์ข€ ๋” ๊ด€๋Œ€ํ•ด์กŒ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
14:45
of the vast world of alternative treatments.
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14:47
And I get letters, I get hundreds of letters
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์—ฌ๋Ÿฌ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์—๊ฒŒ์„œ ์–ด๋–ค ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์ด ํšจ๊ณผ๊ฐ€ ์žˆ์—ˆ๋Š”์ง€
14:50
from people writing to tell me about what's worked for them.
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์ˆ˜๋ฐฑ ํ†ต์˜ ํŽธ์ง€๋„ ๋ฐ›์•˜๊ณ ์š”.
์˜ค๋Š˜์€ ๋ฌด๋Œ€ ๋’ค์—์„œ ๋ˆ„๊ตฐ๊ฐ€
14:53
Someone was asking me backstage today about meditation.
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๋ช…์ƒ๋ฒ•์— ๋Œ€ํ•ด ๋ฌป๊ธฐ๋„ ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
14:56
My favorite of the letters that I got was the one that came from a woman
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์ง€๊ธˆ๊นŒ์ง€ ๋ฐ›์€ ํŽธ์ง€ ์ค‘ ์ œ๊ฐ€ ๊ฐ€์žฅ ์ข‹์•„ํ•˜๋Š” ํŽธ์ง€๋Š”
ํ•œ ์—ฌ์„ฑ๋ถ„์ด ๋ณด๋‚ด์ฃผ์‹  ๊ฑด๋ฐ์š”
15:00
who wrote and said that she had tried therapy, medication,
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์ง€๊ธˆ๊นŒ์ง€ ์ˆ˜๋งŽ์€ ์น˜๋ฃŒ๋ฒ•๊ณผ ์•ฝ๋ฌผ์„ ๋น„๋กฏํ•ด
๊ฑฐ์˜ ๋ชจ๋“  ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์„ ์‹œ๋„ํ•ด๋ดค๋‹ค๊ณ  ํ•˜์…จ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
15:03
she had tried pretty much everything,
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๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ๋‹ค๊ฐ€ ์ฐพ์€ ํ•ด๊ฒฐ์ฑ…์„ ๋„๋ฆฌ ์•Œ๋ ค๋‹ฌ๋ผ๊ณ  ์ œ๊ฒŒ ๋ถ€ํƒํ•˜์…จ์–ด์š”
15:05
and she had found a solution and hoped I would tell the world,
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ํ„ธ์‹ค๋กœ ์ž‘์€ ๋ฌผ๊ฑด์„ ๋งŒ๋“œ๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ด์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
15:08
and that was making little things from yarn.
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15:11
(Laughter)
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(์›ƒ์Œ)
15:14
She sent me some of them.
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์ œ๊ฒŒ๋„ ๋ช‡ ๊ฐœ ๋ณด๋‚ด์ฃผ์…จ์–ด์š”. (์›ƒ์Œ)
15:16
(Laughter)
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15:18
And I'm not wearing them right now.
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์˜ค๋Š˜ ๋‹ฌ๊ณ  ๋‚˜์˜ค์ง„ ์•Š์•˜์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
15:20
(Laughter)
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15:21
I suggested to her that she also should look up
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๊ทธ๋ถ„๊ป˜๋Š” ์ •์‹  ์˜ํ•™ ํŽธ๋žŒ์˜ ๊ฐ•๋ฐ• ์žฅ์•  ๋ถ€๋ถ„์„
15:24
obsessive compulsive disorder in the DSM.
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์ฝ์–ด๋ณด์‹œ๋ผ๊ณ  ๋ง์”€๋“œ๋ ธ์ฃ .
15:28
And yet, when I went to look at alternative treatments,
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์–ด์จŒ๋“  ๊ทธ๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋ฏผ๊ฐ„ ์น˜๋ฃŒ๋ฒ•์„ ์ ‘ํ•˜๊ฒŒ ๋˜๋ฉด์„œ
15:31
I also gained perspective on other treatments.
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๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์š”๋ฒ•๋“ค๋„ ์‚ดํŽด๋ณด๊ฒŒ ๋˜์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
15:34
I went through a tribal exorcism in Senegal
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์„ธ๋„ค๊ฐˆ์˜ ํ•œ ๋ถ€์กฑ์˜ ํ‡ด๋งˆ ์˜์‹์„ ๊ฑฐ์น˜๊ธฐ๋„ ํ–ˆ๊ณ ์š”.
15:37
that involved a great deal of ram's blood
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์–‘์˜ ํ”ผ๋ฅผ ์—„์ฒญ ์‚ฌ์šฉํ•˜๋”๊ตฐ์š”.
15:39
and that I'm not going to detail right now,
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๋” ์ž์„ธํ•œ ์„ค๋ช…์€ ์ƒ๋žตํ•˜๊ฒ ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
15:41
but a few years afterwards I was in Rwanda,
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ๋ช‡ ๋…„ ํ›„ ๋ฅด์™„๋‹ค์—์„œ
15:43
working on a different project,
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๋‹ค๋ฅธ ํ”„๋กœ์ ํŠธ๋ฅผ ๋งก๊ฒŒ ๋˜์—ˆ๋Š”๋ฐ
15:45
and I happened to describe my experience to someone,
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์–ด์ฉŒ๋‹ค ๊ทธ๋•Œ์˜ ๊ฒฝํ—˜์„ ์–˜๊ธฐํ•  ๊ธฐํšŒ๊ฐ€ ์žˆ์—ˆ์–ด์š”.
15:47
and he said,
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๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ์ž ๊ทธ๋ถ„์ด ์ด๋Ÿฌ์…จ์–ด์š”. "๊ฑฐ๊ธด ์„œ์•„ํ”„๋ฆฌ์นด์ž–์•„์š”.
15:49
"Well, that's West Africa, and we're in East Africa,
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์—ฌ๊ธด ๋™์•„ํ”„๋ฆฌ์นด๊ณ ์š”.
15:51
and our rituals are in some ways very different,
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ ๋ฐฉ์‹๊ณผ๋Š” ๋งŽ์ด ๋‹ค๋ฅด์ง€๋งŒ
15:53
but we do have some rituals
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๋ง์”€ํ•˜์‹  ๋‚ด์šฉ์€ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ ์ „ํ†ต๊ณผ๋„
15:55
that have something in common with what you're describing."
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๋น„์Šทํ•œ ๋ถ€๋ถ„์ด ์žˆ๋„ค์š”."
์ œ๊ฐ€ ๊ด€์‹ฌ์„ ๋ณด์ด์ž ๊ทธ๋ถ„์ด ๋ง์”€์„ ์ด์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
15:58
And he said,
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15:59
"But we've had a lot of trouble with Western mental health workers,
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"ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์„œ์ชฝ ์ง€๋ฐฉ ์˜์‚ฌ๋“ค๊ณผ๋Š” ๋ฌธ์ œ๊ฐ€ ๋งŽ์•˜์–ด์š”.
ํŠนํžˆ ๋Œ€ํ•™์‚ด ์งํ›„์— ๊ฑด๋„ˆ์˜จ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค๊ณผ๋Š”์š”."
16:02
especially the ones who came right after the genocide."
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์–ด๋–ค ๋ฌธ์ œ์˜€๋Š”์ง€ ์žฌ์ฐจ ๋ฌผ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
16:05
I said, "What kind of trouble did you have?"
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๊ทธ๋ถ„์€ ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋ง์”€ํ•˜์…จ์–ด์š”.
16:07
And he said, "Well, they would do this bizarre thing.
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"๊ทธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์€ ์ด์ƒํ•œ ์ง“๋“ค์„ ํ•˜๋”๋ผ๊ณ ์š”.
16:10
They didn't take people out in the sunshine
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์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด ํ–‡๋น›์„ ๋ด์•ผ ๊ธฐ๋ถ„์ด ์ข‹์•„์ง€๋Š”๋ฐ
๋ฐ–์— ๋‚ด๋ณด๋‚ด์ง€๋„ ์•Š๊ณ 
16:13
where you begin to feel better.
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16:14
They didn't include drumming or music to get people's blood going.
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๋ถ์ด๋‚˜ ์Œ์•…์„ ์—ฐ์ฃผํ•˜๋ฉฐ ํ˜ˆ์•ก ์ˆœํ™˜์„ ๋•๋Š” ๊ณผ์ •๋„ ์—†๊ณ 
16:17
They didn't involve the whole community.
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๊ณต๋™์ฒด ์ฐจ์›์˜ ํฌ๊ด„์  ์ฐธ์—ฌ๋„ ์—†์—ˆ์–ด์š”.
16:19
They didn't externalize the depression as an invasive spirit.
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๊ฒŒ๋‹ค๊ฐ€ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์ด๋ž€ ๊ฑธ ๋งˆ์Œ์— ์นจํˆฌํ•˜๋Š”
์™ธ๋ถ€์  ์š”์ธ์œผ๋กœ ๋ณด์งˆ ์•Š์•˜์–ด์š”.
16:22
Instead what they did was they took people one at a time into dingy little rooms
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๋Œ€์‹  ์ด๋“ค์„ ํ•œ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์”ฉ
์šฐ์ค‘์ถฉํ•˜๊ณ  ์ž‘์€ ๋ฐฉ์— ์•‰ํ˜€๋†“๊ณ ๋Š”
16:27
and had them talk for an hour
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์–ด๋–ค ์•ˆ ์ข‹์€ ์ผ์ด ์žˆ์—ˆ๋Š”์ง€
16:29
about bad things that had happened to them."
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1์‹œ๊ฐ„ ๋™์•ˆ ์–˜๊ธฐํ•˜๋ผ๊ณ  ์‹œํ‚ค๋”๊ตฐ์š”."
16:31
(Laughter)
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(์›ƒ์Œ, ๋ฐ•์ˆ˜)
16:33
(Applause)
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16:37
He said, "We had to ask them to leave the country."
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๊ฒฐ๊ตญ์—” ๋– ๋‚˜๋‹ฌ๋ผ๊ณ  ๋ถ€ํƒํ–ˆ์–ด์š”.
16:39
(Laughter)
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(์›ƒ์Œ)
16:42
Now at the other end of alternative treatments,
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๋ฏผ๊ฐ„์š”๋ฒ•์˜ ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์ธก๋ฉด์œผ๋กœ ๋„˜์–ด๊ฐ€์„œ
ํ”„๋žญํฌ ๋ฃจ์‚ฌ์ฝ”ํ”„์˜ ์ด์•ผ๊ธฐ๋ฅผ ๋“ค๋ ค๋“œ๋ฆฌ๊ฒ ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
16:45
let me tell you about Frank Russakoff.
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ํ”„๋žญํฌ์˜ ์ฆ์ƒ์€
16:47
Frank Russakoff had the worst depression perhaps that I've ever seen in a man.
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์ œ๊ฐ€ ๋ณธ ์ฆ์„ธ ์ค‘ ๊ฐ€์žฅ ์‹ฌํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
16:52
He was constantly depressed.
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๋Š˜ ์šฐ์šธํ•œ ์ƒํƒœ์˜€์ฃ .
16:54
He was, when I met him,
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์ œ๊ฐ€ ๊ทธ๋ถ„์„ ๋งŒ๋‚ฌ๋˜ ๋‹น์‹œ์—๋Š”
16:56
at a point at which every month, he would have electroshock treatment.
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ํ•œ ๋‹ฌ์— ํ•œ ๋ฒˆ์”ฉ ์ „๊ธฐ ์น˜๋ฃŒ๋ฅผ ๋ฐ›๊ณ  ์žˆ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
17:00
Then he would feel sort of disoriented for a week.
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์น˜๋ฃŒ ํ›„ ์ผ์ฃผ์ผ ์ •๋„๋Š” ํ˜ผ๋ž€์Šค๋Ÿฌ์šด ์ƒํƒœ๊ฐ€ ์ง€์†๋˜๊ณ 
17:02
Then he would feel okay for a week.
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๊ทธ ํ›„ ์ผ์ฃผ์ผ์€ ๋‹ค์‹œ ๊ดœ์ฐฎ์•„์กŒ๋‹ค๊ฐ€
17:04
Then he would have a week of going downhill.
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๊ทธ ๋‹ค์Œ ์ฃผ์—” ๊ธฐ๋ถ„์ด ๋‹ค์‹œ ๊ณค๋‘๋ฐ•์งˆ์ณ์„œ
17:06
And then he would have another electroshock treatment.
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๊ฒฐ๊ตญ ๋‹ค์‹œ ์ „๊ธฐ์น˜๋ฃŒ๋ฅผ ๋ฐ›๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ด์—ˆ์ฃ .
์ ˆ ๋งŒ๋‚ฌ์„ ๋•Œ ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•˜๋”๊ตฐ์š”.
17:09
And he said to me when I met him,
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17:10
"It's unbearable to go through my weeks this way.
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"์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ํ•œ ์ฃผ ํ•œ ์ฃผ ๋ณด๋‚ด๋Š” ๊ฒŒ ๊ฒฌ๋””๊ธฐ ํž˜๋“ค์–ด์š”.
๊ณ„์† ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ์‚ด ์ˆœ ์—†์–ด์š”.
17:13
I can't go on this way,
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17:14
and I've figured out how I'm going to end it
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๋ณ‘์ด ๋‚ซ์ง€ ์•Š์„ ๊ฒฝ์šฐ ์ด ๊ณ ํ†ต์„ ๋๋‚ผ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋Š”
17:16
if I don't get better."
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๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•๋„ ์ƒ๊ฐํ•ด๋ดค์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
17:18
"But," he said to me, "I heard about a protocol at Mass General
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๋ฉ”์‚ฌ์ธ„์„ธ์ธ  ์ข…ํ•ฉ ๋ณ‘์›์—
'๋Œ€์ƒํšŒ์ „์ ˆ๊ฐœ์ˆ '์ด๋ผ๋Š”
17:22
for a procedure called a cingulotomy, which is a brain surgery,
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๋‡Œ์ˆ˜์ˆ ์ด ์žˆ๋‹ค๊ณ  ํ•˜๋”๋ผ๊ณ ์š”.
17:25
and I think I'm going to give that a try."
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๊ทธ ์ˆ˜์ˆ ์„ ๊ณ ๋ คํ•˜๊ณ  ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค."
17:27
And I remember being amazed at that point to think that someone
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์ „ ๊ต‰์žฅํžˆ ๋†€๋ž์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
๊ทธ๋ถ„์ฒ˜๋Ÿผ ์ˆ˜๋งŽ์€ ์น˜๋ฃŒ๋ฅผ ๊ฒช์œผ๋ฉด์„œ
17:31
who clearly had so many bad experiences
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๋ณ„๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์ฐจ๋„๊ฐ€ ์—†์—ˆ๋˜ ๋ถ„์ด
17:34
with so many different treatments
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์•„์ง๋„ ๋งˆ์Œ ์†์—๋Š”
17:36
still had buried in him, somewhere, enough optimism
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๋‹ค๋ฅธ ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์„ ๋ชจ์ƒ‰ํ•  ๋งŒํผ
17:39
to reach out for one more.
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๊ธ์ •์ ์ธ ์ธก๋ฉด์ด ์žˆ๋‹ค๋Š” ์˜๋ฏธ๋‹ˆ๊นŒ์š”.
17:41
And he had the cingulotomy, and it was incredibly successful.
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ๊ทธ ์ˆ˜์ˆ ์„ ๋ฐ›์•˜์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
๊ฒฐ๊ณผ๋Š” ๋Œ€์„ฑ๊ณต์ด์—ˆ์ฃ .
17:45
He's now a friend of mine.
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์ง€๊ธˆ์€ ์ €์™€ ์นœ๊ตฌ๋กœ ์ง€๋ƒ…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
17:47
He has a lovely wife and two beautiful children.
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์•„๋ฆ„๋‹ค์šด ์•„๋‚ด์™€ ๊ท€์—ฌ์šด ์•„์ด๋“ค๋„ ์žˆ๊ณ ์š”.
17:50
He wrote me a letter the Christmas after the surgery,
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์ˆ˜์ˆ  ํ›„ ํฌ๋ฆฌ์Šค๋งˆ์Šค๋ฅผ ๋งž์•„ ์ œ๊ฒŒ ๋ณด๋‚ธ ํŽธ์ง€์—์„œ
17:53
and he said,
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๊ทธ๋Š” ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋งํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
17:55
"My father sent me two presents this year,
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"์šฐ๋ฆฌ ์•„๋ฒ„์ง€๊ฐ€ ์˜ฌํ•ด ์„ ๋ฌผ ๋‘ ๊ฐœ๋ฅผ ์ฃผ์…จ๋Š”๋ฐ
17:57
First, a motorized CD rack from The Sharper Image
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ํ•˜๋‚˜๋Š” ์ƒคํผ์ด๋ฏธ์ง€์—์„œ ์‚ฐ
18:00
that I didn't really need,
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๋ชจํ„ฐ๋‹ฌ๋ฆฐ CD ์„ ๋ฐ˜์ด์—์š”.
18:01
but I knew he was giving it to me to celebrate
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๋ณ„ ํ•„์š”๋Š” ์—†์ง€๋งŒ ์ถ•ํ•˜ํ•˜๋Š” ์˜๋ฏธ๋กœ ์ฃผ์…จ์ฃ .
18:03
the fact that I'm living on my own and have a job I seem to love.
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์ด์   ๋‚ด ์˜์ง€๋กœ ์‚ถ์„ ์ด์–ด๊ฐ€๊ณ 
๊ดœ์ฐฎ์€ ์ง์žฅ๋„ ๊ฐ€์กŒ์œผ๋‹ˆ๊นŒ์š”.
18:07
And the other present was a photo of my grandmother,
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๋‹ค๋ฅธ ํ•˜๋‚˜๋Š”
์šฐ๋ฆฌ ํ• ๋จธ๋‹ˆ ์‚ฌ์ง„์ธ๋ฐ
18:10
who committed suicide.
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์ž์‚ด๋กœ ๋Œ์•„๊ฐ€์…จ์–ด์š”.
18:12
As I unwrapped it, I began to cry,
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๊ทธ ์„ ๋ฌผ์„ ํ’€์–ด๋ณด๊ณ  ์šธ์Œ์„ ํ„ฐ๋œจ๋ ธ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
18:15
and my mother came over and said,
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๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ์ž ์šฐ๋ฆฌ ์–ด๋จธ๋‹ˆ๊ฐ€ ๋‹ค๊ฐ€์™€
18:17
'Are you crying because of the relatives you never knew?'
390
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'ํ• ๋จธ๋‹ˆ๋ฅผ ๋งŒ๋‚œ ์ ์ด ์—†์–ด์„œ ์Šฌํ”„๋ƒ?'๊ณ  ํ•˜์…จ์–ด์š”.
๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ๋‚˜์™€ ๊ฐ™์€ ๋ณ‘์„ ์•“์•˜๋˜ ๋ถ„์ด๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์ด๋ผ๊ณ  ํ–ˆ์ฃ .
18:21
And I said, 'She had the same disease I have.'
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18:25
I'm crying now as I write to you.
392
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์ด ํŽธ์ง€๋ฅผ ์“ฐ๋Š” ์ง€๊ธˆ๋„ ๋ˆˆ๋ฌผ์ด ํ๋ฅด๋„ค์š”.
18:27
It's not that I'm so sad, but I get overwhelmed,
393
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์Šฌํผ์„œ๊ฐ€ ์•„๋‹ˆ๋ผ ๊ฐ์ •์— ๋ณต๋ฐ›์ณ์„œ์š”.
18:31
I think, because I could have killed myself,
394
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๋‚˜๋„ ๊ทธ๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ์‚ถ์„ ๋๋‚ผ ์ˆ˜๋„ ์žˆ์—ˆ๋Š”๋ฐ
18:33
but my parents kept me going, and so did the doctors,
395
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๋ถ€๋ชจ๋‹˜๊ป˜์„œ ๋‚  ๋Œ์–ด์ฃผ์…จ๊ณ 
์˜์‚ฌ๋“ค๋„ ๋งˆ์ฐฌ๊ฐ€์ง€์˜€์–ด์š”.
18:36
and I had the surgery.
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์ˆ˜์ˆ ๋„ ์ž˜ ๋๊ณ ์š”.
18:38
I'm alive and grateful.
397
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์‚ด์•„์žˆ์Œ์— ๊ฐ์‚ฌํ•˜๊ณ  ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
18:41
We live in the right time, even if it doesn't always feel like it."
398
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์šฐ๋ฆฐ ๊ดœ์ฐฎ์€ ์„ธ์ƒ์— ์‚ด๊ณ  ์žˆ๋Š” ๊ฑฐ์˜ˆ์š”.
๊ฐ€๋” ๊ทธ๋ ‡์ง€ ์•Š์€ ๊ฒƒ์ฒ˜๋Ÿผ ๋Š๊ปด์ง€๋”๋ผ๋„."
18:47
I was struck by the fact that depression
399
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1919
์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์ด ๋ณดํŽธ์ ์œผ๋กœ ํ˜„๋Œ€ ์„œ๊ตฌ ์‚ฌํšŒ์˜
18:49
is broadly perceived to be a modern, Western, middle-class thing,
400
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์ค‘์‚ฐ์ธต์—์„œ ์ฃผ๋กœ ๋ฐœ์ƒํ•œ๋‹ค๋Š” ํ†ต๋…์—
์ „ ๋ชน์‹œ ๋†€๋ž์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
18:54
and I went to look at how it operated in a variety of other contexts,
401
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4131
๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์—ฌ๋Ÿฌ ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์ƒํ™ฉ์—์„œ
์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์ด ์–ด๋–ป๊ฒŒ ์ž‘๋™ํ•˜๋Š”์ง€ ์•Œ์•„๋ณด๊ธฐ๋กœ ํ–ˆ์ฃ .
18:58
and one of the things I was most interested in
402
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2191
๊ทธ์ค‘์—์„œ๋„ ์ธ์ƒ ๊นŠ์—ˆ๋˜ ๊ฒƒ์€
19:01
was depression among the indigent.
403
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1915
๋นˆ๊ณค์ธต์˜ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์ด์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ๊ฐ€๋‚œํ•œ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ ํ™˜์ž์˜
19:03
And so I went out to try to look
404
1143138
1548
19:04
at what was being done for poor people with depression.
405
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์น˜๋ฃŒ๋ฒ•์„ ์‚ดํŽด๋ณด๊ธฐ๋กœ ํ–ˆ์ฃ .
19:07
And what I discovered is that poor people
406
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์—ฐ๊ตฌ ๊ฒฐ๊ณผ ๊ฐ€๋‚œํ•œ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์€
19:09
are mostly not being treated for depression.
407
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๋Œ€์ฒด๋กœ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ ์น˜๋ฃŒ๋ฅผ ๋ฐ›์ง€ ์•Š๋Š”๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ด์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์˜ ์›์ธ์€ ์œ ์ „์  ์ทจ์•ฝ์ ์— ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
19:12
Depression is the result of a genetic vulnerability,
408
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2674
19:14
which is presumably evenly distributed in the population,
409
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3350
์ธ๊ตฌ ์ „์ฒด์— ๊ณ ๋ฅด๊ฒŒ ๋ถ„ํฌํ•˜์ฃ .
19:18
and triggering circumstances,
410
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1713
๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์„ ์œ ๋ฐœํ•˜๋Š” ์ƒํ™ฉ์  ์š”์†Œ๋“ค๋„
19:19
which are likely to be more severe for people who are impoverished.
411
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๊ฐ€๋‚œ์— ์ฐŒ๋“  ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ผ์ˆ˜๋ก
์‹ฌ๊ฐํ•  ๊ฐ€๋Šฅ์„ฑ์ด ๋†’๊ณ ์š”.
19:23
And yet it turns out that if you have a really lovely life
412
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์•Œ๊ณ  ๋ณด๋‹ˆ ๊ดœ์ฐฎ์€ ์ธ์ƒ์ด๋ผ๋„
๋Š˜ ํž˜๋“ค๊ณ  ๊ณ ํ†ต์Šค๋Ÿฝ๋‹ค๋ฉด
19:27
but feel miserable all the time,
413
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19:28
you think, "Why do I feel like this?
414
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"๋‚ด๊ฐ€ ์™œ ์ด๋Ÿฌ์ง€?
19:30
I must have depression."
415
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1269
์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์ด ํ‹€๋ฆผ์—†์–ด." ๋ผ๊ณ  ์ƒ๊ฐํ•˜๊ฒŒ ๋˜์ฃ .
19:32
And you set out to find treatment for it.
416
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ ์น˜๋ฃŒ๋ฒ•์„ ์ฐพ๊ฒŒ ๋˜๊ณ ์š”.
ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ๋Š˜ ๊ณ ๋‹ฌํ”ˆ ์ธ์ƒ์ด๋ผ๋ฉด
19:34
But if you have a perfectly awful life,
417
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1932
19:36
and you feel miserable all the time,
418
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๋Š˜ ๊ณ ํ†ต์Šค๋Ÿฝ๊ฒ ์ฃ .
19:37
the way you feel is commensurate with your life,
419
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3010
์‚ด๊ธฐ๊ฐ€ ํž˜๋“œ๋‹ˆ๊นŒ ํž˜๋“ ๊ฒŒ ๋‹น์—ฐํ•˜๋‹ค๊ณ  ๋Š๋ผ๋Š” ๊ฒ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
19:40
and it doesn't occur to you to think,
420
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1855
๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์ด๋Ÿฌํ•œ ์ƒํ™ฉ์„
19:42
"Maybe this is treatable."
421
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1537
์น˜๋ฃŒํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋‹ค๊ณ  ์ƒ๊ฐํ•˜์ง€๋ฅผ ์•Š์ฃ .
19:44
And so we have an epidemic in this country
422
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3202
ํ˜„์žฌ ๋นˆ๊ณค์ธต ๋‚ด ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์€
19:47
of depression among impoverished people
423
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์ „๊ตญ์ ์œผ๋กœ ๋งŒ์—ฐํ•œ ์ƒํƒœ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
19:50
that's not being picked up and that's not being treated
424
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์•„๋ฌด๋„ ์ด๋“ค์„ ๋ฐ๋ ค๋‹ค ์น˜๋ฃŒํ•˜์ง€๋„ ์•Š๊ณ 
19:52
and that's not being addressed,
425
1192874
1948
์ฃผ๋ชฉํ•˜์ง€๋„ ์•Š์•„์š”.
19:54
and it's a tragedy of a grand order.
426
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2071
์ •๋ง ์ฐธ๋‹ดํ•œ ์ผ์ด ์•„๋‹ ์ˆ˜ ์—†์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
19:57
And so I found an academic
427
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1600
๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์ €๋Š” ๊ด€๋ จ ์—ฐ๊ตฌ๋ฅผ ์ง„ํ–‰ ์ค‘์ธ
19:58
who was doing a research project in slums outside of D.C.,
428
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3225
ํ•œ ์ „๋ฌธ๊ฐ€๋ฅผ ์ฐพ์•„๊ฐ”์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
์›Œ์‹ฑํ„ดDC ์™ธ๊ณฝ์˜ ์Šฌ๋Ÿผ๊ฐ€์—์„œ
20:02
where she picked up women who had come in for other health problems
429
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3143
๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์งˆ๋ณ‘์œผ๋กœ ๋ณ‘์›์„ ์ฐพ์•˜๋‹ค๊ฐ€ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ ์ง„๋‹จ์„ ๋ฐ›์€
20:05
and diagnosed them with depression,
430
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1755
์—ฌ์„ฑ๋“ค์„ ์ƒ๋Œ€๋กœ ํ•œ ์—ฐ๊ตฌ์˜€์ฃ .
๊ทธ๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๊ทธ๋ถ„๋“ค๊ณผ 6๊ฐœ์›”๊ฐ„ ์‹คํ—˜์„ ์ง„ํ–‰ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
20:07
and then provided six months of the experimental protocol.
431
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3072
20:10
One of them, Lolly, came in,
432
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2305
๊ทธ ์ค‘ ๋กค๋ฆฌ๋ผ๋Š” ๋ถ„์ด
20:12
and this is what she said the day she came in.
433
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2273
์‹คํ—˜ ์ฐธ์—ฌ ์ฒซ๋‚  ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋ง์”€ํ•˜์‹œ๋”๊ตฐ์š”.
์•„์ด๊ฐ€ ์ผ๊ณฑ์ด๋‚˜ ์žˆ๋Š”
20:15
She said, and she was a woman, by the way, who had seven children.
434
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์—ฌ์„ฑ๋ถ„์ด์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
20:19
She said, "I used to have a job but I had to give it up
435
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2785
"์ž˜ ๋‹ค๋‹ˆ๋˜ ์ง์žฅ๋„ ์žˆ์—ˆ๋Š”๋ฐ
20:22
because I couldn't go out of the house.
436
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2215
์ง‘ ๋ฐ–์œผ๋กœ ๋‚˜๊ฐˆ ์ˆ˜๊ฐ€ ์—†์–ด์„œ ๊ทธ๋งŒ๋‘ฌ์•ผ ํ–ˆ์–ด์š”.
์•„์ด๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ํ•  ๋ง๋„ ์—†๊ณ ์š”.
20:25
I have nothing to say to my children.
437
1225134
1940
20:27
In the morning, I can't wait for them to leave,
438
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2482
์•„์นจ์—๋Š” ์• ๋“ค์ด ํ•™๊ต์— ๊ฐ€๊ธฐ๋งŒ์„ ๊ธฐ๋‹ค๋ ค์š”.
20:29
and then I climb in bed and pull the covers over my head,
439
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3202
์•„์ด๋“ค์ด ๊ฐ€๊ณ  ๋‚˜๋ฉด ์นจ๋Œ€์— ๋ˆ„์›Œ ์ด๋ถˆ์„ ๋ฎ์–ด์“ฐ๊ณ ์š”.
์„ธ ์‹œ์ฏค ์•„์ด๋“ค์ด ๋Œ์•„์˜ค๋Š”๋ฐ
20:33
and three o'clock when they come home,
440
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1875
๊ทธ ์‹œ๊ฐ„์€ ์™œ ๊ทธ๋ฆฌ ๋นจ๋ฆฌ ์˜ค๋Š”์ง€.
20:35
it just comes so fast."
441
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20:36
She said, "I've been taking a lot of Tylenol,
442
1236544
2294
ํƒ€์ด๋ ˆ๋†€์„ ๋งŽ์ด ๋จน์–ด์š”.
20:38
anything I can take so that I can sleep more.
443
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์ž ์„ ๋” ์ž˜ ์ˆ˜๋งŒ ์žˆ๋‹ค๋ฉด ๋ฌด์Šจ ์•ฝ์ด๋“  ๋จน์–ด์š”.
20:41
My husband has been telling me I'm stupid, I'm ugly.
444
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3997
๋‚จํŽธ์€ ๋Š˜ ์ €๋ณด๊ณ  ๋ฉ์ฒญํ•˜๋‹ค, ๋ชป์ƒ๊ฒผ๋‹ค ๊ทธ๋ž˜์š”.
20:45
I wish I could stop the pain."
445
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์ด ๊ณ ํ†ต์ด ์ œ๋ฐœ ๋ฉˆ์ท„์œผ๋ฉด ์ข‹๊ฒ ์–ด์š”."
20:48
Well, she was brought into this experimental protocol,
446
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๊ทธ๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๊ทธ๋ถ„์ด ์‹คํ—˜์— ์ฐธ์—ฌํ•œ ํ›„
20:51
and when I interviewed her six months later,
447
1251555
2191
6๊ฐœ์›”์ด ์ง€๋‚˜ ๋‹ค์‹œ ์ธํ„ฐ๋ทฐ๋ฅผ ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
20:53
she had taken a job working in childcare
448
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4225
๋ฏธ ํ•ด๊ตฐ์—์„œ ์šด์˜ํ•˜๋Š” ๋ณด์œก์‹œ์„ค์—์„œ ์ผํ•˜๊ฒŒ ๋˜์—ˆ๊ณ 
20:58
for the U.S. Navy, she had left the abusive husband,
449
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4050
ํญ๋ ฅ์ ์ธ ๋‚จํŽธ๊ณผ๋„ ํ—ค์–ด์กŒ๋”๋ผ๊ณ ์š”.
๊ทธ๋ถ„์ด ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋ง์”€ํ•˜์‹œ๋”๊ตฐ์š”.
21:02
and she said to me,
450
1262093
2023
"์š”์ฆ˜์€ ์•„์ด๋“ค๋„ ์ •๋ง ํ–‰๋ณตํ•ดํ•ด์š”.
21:04
"My kids are so much happier now."
451
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2255
21:06
She said, "There's one room in my new place for the boys
452
1266419
2682
์ƒˆ๋กœ ์ด์‚ฌํ•œ ์ง‘์— ๋”ธ๋“ค ๋ฐฉ์ด ๋”ฐ๋กœ ์žˆ๊ณ 
์•„๋“ค๋“ค์ด ์“ฐ๋Š” ๋ฐฉ๋„ ๋”ฐ๋กœ ์žˆ๋Š”๋ฐ
21:09
and one room for the girls,
453
1269125
1887
์ €๋…์—๋Š” ๋ชจ๋‘ ์ œ ๋ฐฉ์œผ๋กœ ์™€์„œ
21:11
but at night, they're just all up on my bed,
454
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2339
21:13
and we're doing homework all together and everything.
455
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2588
๊ฐ™์ด ์ˆ™์ œ๋„ ํ•˜๊ณ  ๊ทธ๋ž˜์š”.
21:16
One of them wants to be a preacher,
456
1276011
1674
ํ•œ ๋…€์„์€ ๋ชฉ์‚ฌ๊ฐ€ ๋˜๊ณ  ์‹ถ๋Œ€์š”.
21:17
one of them wants to be a firefighter,
457
1277709
1893
๋‹ค๋ฅธ ๋…€์„์€ ์†Œ๋ฐฉ๊ด€,
21:19
and one of the girls says she's going to be a lawyer.
458
1279626
2700
๋”ธ๋‚ด๋ฏธ ํ•˜๋‚˜๋Š” ๋ณ€ํ˜ธ์‚ฌ๊ฐ€ ๋ ๊ฑฐ๋ผ๊ณ  ํ•˜๊ณ ์š”.
21:22
They don't cry like they used to,
459
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2204
์•„์ด๋“ค์€ ์˜ˆ์ „์ฒ˜๋Ÿผ ์šธ์ง€๋„ ์•Š๊ณ 
21:24
and they don't fight like they did.
460
1284578
1810
์‹ธ์šฐ์ง€๋„ ์•Š์•„์š”.
์ด์   ์•„์ด๋“ค๋งŒ์œผ๋กœ๋„ ์ถฉ๋ถ„ํ•ด์š”.
21:27
That's all I need now, is my kids.
461
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2825
21:30
Things keep on changing,
462
1290826
1945
์ €๋„ ๋งŽ์ด ๋ฐ”๋€Œ๊ณ  ์žˆ์–ด์š”.
21:32
the way I dress, the way I feel, the way I act.
463
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4376
์˜ท ์ž…๋Š” ๋ฐฉ์‹์ด๋‚˜ ๊ธฐ๋ถ„๋„, ํ–‰๋™๋„์š”.
21:37
I can go outside not being afraid anymore,
464
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3801
์ด์   ๋ฐ–์— ๋‚˜๊ฐ€๋„ ๋ฌด์„ญ์ง€ ์•Š์•„์š”.
21:41
and I don't think those bad feelings are coming back,
465
1301734
3488
๋ถ€์ •์ ์ธ ์ƒ๊ฐ๋“ค๋„ ๋ฉˆ์ถ˜ ๊ฒƒ ๊ฐ™๊ณ ์š”.
๋ฏธ๋ž€๋‹ค ์„ ์ƒ๋‹˜์ด ์•„๋‹ˆ์—ˆ๋‹ค๋ฉด
21:45
and if it weren't for Dr. Miranda and that,
466
1305246
2936
์ „ ์ง€๊ธˆ๋„ ์ด๋ถˆ์„ ๋ฎ์–ด์“ฐ๊ณ  ๋ˆ„์›Œ๋งŒ ์žˆ๊ฒ ์ฃ .
21:48
I would still be at home with the covers pulled over my head,
467
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3522
21:51
if I were still alive at all.
468
1311752
1853
๊ทธ๊ฒƒ๋„ ์ง€๊ธˆ๊นŒ์ง€ ์‚ด์•„์žˆ๋‹ค๋ฉด์š”.
์ฒœ์‚ฌ๋ฅผ ๋ณด๋‚ด๋‹ฌ๋ผ๊ณ  ๊ฐ„์ ˆํžˆ ๊ธฐ๋„ํ–ˆ๋Š”๋ฐ
21:54
I asked the Lord to send me an angel,
469
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3506
21:57
and He heard my prayers."
470
1317627
1777
ํ•˜๋Š๋‹˜๊ป˜์„œ ์ œ ๊ธฐ๋„๋ฅผ ๋“ค์–ด์ฃผ์…จ์–ด์š”."
์ด ๊ฒฝํ—˜์ด ์ €์—๊ฒŒ๋Š” ์ „๋ถ€ ๊ฐ๋™์ด์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
22:02
I was really moved by these experiences,
471
1322308
2980
22:05
and I decided that I wanted to write about them
472
1325312
2515
๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์ด ์ด์•ผ๊ธฐ๋ฅผ ๊ธ€๋กœ ์˜ฎ๊ฒจ
22:07
not only in a book I was working on, but also in an article,
473
1327851
2817
์ง‘ํ•„ ์ค‘์ด๋˜ ์ œ ์ฑ…์„ ๋น„๋กฏํ•ด
์žก์ง€ ๊ธฐ์‚ฌ๋กœ๋„ ์‹ฃ๊ธฐ๋กœ ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
22:10
and I got a commission from The New York Times Magazine
474
1330692
2579
๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ๋‰ด์š• ํƒ€์ž„์ฆˆ ๋งค๊ฑฐ์ง„์˜ ๊ฒฐ์ •์œผ๋กœ
๋นˆ๊ณค์ธต์˜ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์— ๊ด€ํ•œ ๊ธฐ์‚ฌ๋ฅผ ์“ฐ๊ฒŒ ๋์ฃ .
22:13
to write about depression among the indigent.
475
1333295
2119
์›๊ณ ๋ฅผ ๋„˜๊ธฐ๊ณ  ๋‚œ ํ›„
22:15
And I turned in my story,
476
1335438
1237
22:16
and my editor called me and said, "We really can't publish this."
477
1336699
3460
ํŽธ์ง‘์ž์—๊ฒŒ์„œ ์ „ํ™”๊ฐ€ ์™”์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
"์ด๊ฑด ์‹ฃ๊ธฐ ์–ด๋ ต๊ฒ ๋Š”๋ฐ์š”."
์™œ ๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ๋ƒ๊ณ  ๋ฌผ์—ˆ์ฃ .
22:20
And I said, "Why not?"
478
1340668
1159
22:21
And she said, "It just is too far-fetched.
479
1341851
2071
์‹ ๋น™์„ฑ์ด ๋–จ์–ด์ง„๋‹ค๋”๊ตฐ์š”.
22:23
These people who are sort of at the very bottom rung of society
480
1343946
3663
"์†Œ์œ„ ์ตœํ•˜์œ„ ๊ณ„์ธต์˜ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด
22:27
and then they get a few months of treatment
481
1347633
2015
๋ช‡ ๋‹ฌ ๋™์•ˆ ์น˜๋ฃŒ๋ฅผ ๋ฐ›๊ณ  ๋‚˜๋‹ˆ
22:29
and they're virtually ready to run Morgan Stanley?
482
1349672
2373
๊ฐ‘์ž๊ธฐ ๋ฉ€์ฉกํ•ด์ ธ์„œ ๋ญ๋“  ํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๊ฒŒ ๋œ๋‹ค๊ณ ์š”?
๋ง์ด ์•ˆ ๋˜์ž–์•„์š”.
22:32
It's just too implausible."
483
1352069
1516
๊ทธ๋Ÿฐ ์–˜๊ธฐ๋Š” ๋“ฃ๋„๋ณด๋„ ๋ชป ํ–ˆ์–ด์š”."
22:34
She said, "I've never even heard of anything like it."
484
1354013
2581
22:36
And I said, "The fact that you've never heard of it
485
1356618
2453
๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์ œ๊ฐ€ ๋งํ–ˆ์ฃ . "๋“ฃ๋„๋ณด๋„ ๋ชปํ•œ ์ผ์ด๋‹ˆ๊นŒ
๋‰ด์Šค๊ฑฐ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ๋˜๋Š” ๊ฒ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค."
22:39
is an indication that it is news."
486
1359095
2103
22:41
(Laughter)
487
1361907
4023
(์›ƒ์Œ, ๋ฐ•์ˆ˜)
22:45
(Applause)
488
1365954
3339
22:49
"And you are a news magazine."
489
1369317
2117
"๋‰ด์Šค๊ฑฐ๋ฆฌ๋ฅผ ์‹ฃ๋Š” ์žก์ง€์ž–์•„์š”."
22:51
So after a certain amount of negotiation, they agreed to it.
490
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3060
์–ผ๋งˆ๊ฐ„์˜ ํ˜‘์ƒ ๋์—
์žก์ง€์‚ฌ์˜ ๋™์˜๋ฅผ ์–ป์„ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
22:55
But I think a lot of what they said was connected in some strange way
491
1375034
3886
ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์žก์ง€์‚ฌ์˜ ์˜๊ฒฌ ์ค‘ ์ƒ๋‹น ๋ถ€๋ถ„์ด
๋งŽ์€ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด ์—ฌ์ „ํžˆ ๊ฐ–๊ณ  ์žˆ๋Š”
22:58
to this distaste that people still have for the idea of treatment,
492
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3581
๋นˆ๊ณค์ธต์˜ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ ์น˜๋ฃŒ์— ๋Œ€ํ•œ
๋ถˆ์พŒ๊ฐ๊ณผ ์—ฐ๊ด€์ด ์žˆ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
23:02
the notion that somehow if we went out
493
1382549
1858
์ €ํฌ๊ฐ€ ๋นˆ๊ณคํ•œ ์ง€์—ญ ์‚ฌํšŒ์— ๊ฐ€์„œ
23:04
and treated a lot of people in indigent communities,
494
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2823
๋งŽ์€ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์„ ์น˜๋ฃŒํ•ด ์ค€ ๊ฒƒ์ด ๊ฒฐ๊ตญ์€ ์‹คํ—˜์— ์ด์šฉํ•˜๋ ค๋Š”
23:07
that would be exploitative,
495
1387278
1856
๋ถ€์ ์ ˆํ•œ ์ผ์ด๋ผ๊ณ ๋„ ๋งํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
23:09
because we would be changing them.
496
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1698
์šฐ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ๊ทธ๋“ค์„ ๋ณ€ํ™”์‹œํ‚ค๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์ด๋ผ๋‚˜์š”.
23:10
There is this false moral imperative that seems to be all around us,
497
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3807
์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์˜ ์น˜๋ฃŒ๋Š”
์•ฝ๋ฌผ์ด๋“  ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ๋ฌด์—‡์ด๋“  ์ธ์œ„์ ์ธ ๊ฒƒ์ด๋ฉฐ
23:14
that treatment of depression,
498
1394711
2108
์ž์—ฐ์Šค๋Ÿฝ์ง€ ์•Š๋‹ค๋Š”
23:16
the medications and so on, are an artifice,
499
1396843
2275
์ด๋Ÿฐ ์˜ณ์ง€ ์•Š์€ ๋„๋•์  ์˜๋ฌด๋ฅผ ๊ฐ€์ง„ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด
23:19
and that it's not natural.
500
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2323
์šฐ๋ฆฌ ์ฃผ๋ณ€์— ๋งŽ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
23:21
And I think that's very misguided.
501
1401489
2943
์ž˜๋ชป๋œ ํŒ๋‹จ์ด์ฃ .
23:24
It would be natural for people's teeth to fall out,
502
1404456
3333
์ด๊ฐ€ ๋น ์ง€๋Š” ๊ฑด ๋‹น์—ฐํ•œ ์ผ์ธ๋ฐ
23:27
but there is nobody militating against toothpaste,
503
1407813
3188
์น˜์•ฝ์„ ์“ฐ๋ฉด ์•ˆ ๋œ๋‹ค๊ณ  ์ฃผ์žฅํ•˜๋Š” ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์€ ์—†์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
23:31
at least not in my circles.
504
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1470
์ ์–ด๋„ ์ œ ์ฃผ๋ณ€์—๋Š”์š”.
23:33
People then say,
505
1413915
1244
์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋ง์”€ํ•˜์‹œ๋Š” ๋ถ„๋“ค๋„ ๊ณ„์‹ญ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
23:35
"But isn't depression part of what people are supposed to experience?
506
1415183
3261
"์šฐ์šธ์ฆ๋„ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ๊ฒช์–ด์•ผ ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒฝํ—˜์˜ ์ผ์ข… ์•„๋‹Œ๊ฐ€์š”?
์ง„ํ™”์˜ ๊ฒฐ๊ณผ๊ฐ€ ์•„๋‹Œ๊ฐ€์š”?
23:38
Didn't we evolve to have depression?
507
1418468
1732
์šฐ๋ฆฌ ์„ฑ๊ฒฉ์˜ ์ผ๋ถ€ ์•„๋‹Œ๊ฐ€์š”?"
23:40
Isn't it part of your personality?"
508
1420224
1751
23:41
To which I would say, mood is adaptive.
509
1421999
2439
์ „ ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋‹ตํ•˜๊ฒ ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
23:44
Being able to have sadness and fear
510
1424462
3077
๊ธฐ๋ถ„์€ ์กฐ์ ˆ์ด ๊ฐ€๋Šฅํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
23:47
and joy and pleasure
511
1427563
1906
์Šฌํ””, ๋‘๋ ค์›€, ์ฆ๊ฑฐ์›€, ๊ธฐ์จ,
23:49
and all of the other moods that we have, that's incredibly valuable.
512
1429493
3755
๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ๋ชจ๋“  ๊ธฐ๋ถ„์„ ๋Š๋‚„ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์€
์—„์ฒญ๋‚œ ์ถ•๋ณต์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
23:53
And major depression
513
1433272
1914
๊ทธ๋Ÿฐ ๊ธฐ๋ถ„์„ ๊ด€์žฅํ•˜๋Š” ์‹œ์Šคํ…œ์ด ๋ฌด๋„ˆ์กŒ์„ ๋•Œ
23:55
is something that happens when that system gets broken.
514
1435210
3362
์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์ด ์ฐพ์•„์˜ต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
23:58
It's maladaptive.
515
1438596
1604
์ผ์ข…์˜ ๋ถ€์ ์‘์ด์ฃ .
24:00
People will come to me and say,
516
1440224
1615
์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋ง์”€ํ•˜์‹œ๋Š” ๋ถ„๋“ค๋„ ๊ณ„์‹ญ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
24:01
"I think, though, if I just stick it out for another year,
517
1441863
2802
"ํ•œ ์ผ ๋…„ ์ •๋„๋งŒ ๋” ๊ฒฌ๋””๋ฉด
24:04
I think I can just get through this."
518
1444689
1853
๊ดœ์ฐฎ์•„์งˆ ๊ฒƒ ๊ฐ™์•„์š”."
24:06
And I always say to them, "You may get through it,
519
1446566
2524
๊ทธ๋Ÿผ ์ „ ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. "๊ทธ๋Ÿด ์ˆ˜๋„ ์žˆ์ฃ .
ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ๋‹น์‹ ์˜ 37์‚ด์€ ๋‹ค์‹œ ๋Œ์•„์˜ค์ง€ ์•Š์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
24:09
but you'll never be 37 again.
520
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2190
24:11
Life is short, and that's a whole year you're talking about giving up.
521
1451733
3709
์งง์€ ์ธ์ƒ ์ค‘ ์ผ ๋…„์„
ํ†ต์งธ๋กœ ํฌ๊ธฐํ•˜๋ ค๋Š” ๊ฑฐ์ž–์•„์š”.
24:15
Think it through."
522
1455982
1151
์ž˜ ์ƒ๊ฐํ•ด ๋ณด์„ธ์š”."
24:17
It's a strange poverty of the English language,
523
1457694
2648
์˜์–ด์—์„œ๋„ ๊ทธ๋ ‡๊ณ 
24:20
and indeed of many other languages,
524
1460366
2084
๋‹ค๋ฅธ ๋งŽ์€ ์–ธ์–ด๋„ ๋งˆ์ฐฌ๊ฐ€์ง€์ง€๋งŒ
24:22
that we use this same word, depression,
525
1462474
2370
์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์ด๋ผ๋Š” ๋‹จ์–ด์˜ ๋นˆ๊ณคํ•จ๋„ ๋ฌธ์ œ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
24:24
to describe how a kid feels when it rains on his birthday,
526
1464868
3714
์ƒ์ผ์— ๋น„๊ฐ€ ์˜ฌ ๋•Œ ๊ผฌ๋งˆ๊ฐ€ ๋Š๋ผ๋Š” ๊ธฐ๋ถ„๋„
์šฐ์šธํ•˜๋‹ค๊ณ  ํ‘œํ˜„ํ•˜๊ณ 
24:28
and to describe how somebody feels the minute before they commit suicide.
527
1468606
4359
์ž์‚ด์„ ์‹œ๋„ํ•˜๊ธฐ ๋ช‡ ๋ถ„ ์ „
ํ•œ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด ๋Š๋ผ๋Š” ๊ฐ์ •๋„ ์šฐ์šธํ•˜๋‹ค๊ณ  ํ‘œํ˜„ํ•˜๋‹ˆ๊นŒ์š”.
24:33
People say to me, "Well, is it continuous with normal sadness?"
528
1473495
3006
์˜ค๋ž˜ ์ง€์†๋˜๋Š” ์Šฌํ”ˆ ๊ฐ์ •์ด ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์ด ์•„๋‹ˆ๋ƒ๋Š” ๋ถ„๋“ค๋„ ์žˆ์–ด์š”.
24:36
And I say, in a way it's continuous with normal sadness.
529
1476525
3107
์–ด๋–ค ๋ฉด์—์„œ๋Š” ๊ทธ๋ ‡๋‹ค๊ณ  ํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์ฃ .
24:39
There is a certain amount of continuity,
530
1479656
2174
ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ๊ทธ ์ง€์†์„ฑ์˜ ์ฐจ์ด๋Š”
24:41
but it's the same way there's continuity
531
1481854
1937
์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ์„ค๋ช…ํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
24:43
between having an iron fence outside your house
532
1483815
2206
์ง‘ ๋งˆ๋‹น์˜ ์šธํƒ€๋ฆฌ์—
๋…น์ด ์กฐ๊ธˆ ์Šฌ์—ˆ์„ ๋•Œ๋Š”
24:46
that gets a little rust spot
533
1486045
1420
24:47
that you have to sand off and do a little repainting,
534
1487489
2598
๊ทธ ๋ถ€๋ถ„๋งŒ ๊ฐˆ์•„๋‚ด๊ณ  ๋‹ค์‹œ ํŽ˜์ธํŠธ์น ํ•˜๋ฉด ๋˜์ฃ .
24:50
and what happens if you leave the house for 100 years
535
1490111
2828
๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ๋‚˜ ๊ทธ ์ง‘์„ 100๋…„ ๋™์•ˆ ๊ทธ๋Œ€๋กœ ๋‘๋ฉด
24:52
and it rusts through until it's only a pile of orange dust.
536
1492963
3799
๋…น์ด ์ ์  ์‹ฌํ•ด์ ธ์„œ ๊ฒฐ๊ตญ ์šธํƒ€๋ฆฌ ์ „์ฒด๊ฐ€
ํ•œ ์คŒ์˜ ๊ฐˆ์ƒ‰ ๋จผ์ง€๊ฐ€ ๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
๋ฐ”๋กœ ์ด ๋…น์Šจ ๋ถ€๋ถ„,
24:57
And it's that orange dust spot,
537
1497082
1853
24:58
that orange dust problem,
538
1498959
1765
์ด ๋ฌธ์ œ์•ผ๋ง๋กœ
25:00
that's the one we're setting out to address.
539
1500748
2586
์šฐ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ์ฃผ๋ชฉํ•ด์•ผ ํ•  ๋ถ€๋ถ„์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
ํ˜น์ž๋Š” ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•˜์ฃ .
25:04
So now people say,
540
1504040
2214
"์šฐ์šธ์ฆ ์น˜๋ฃŒ ์•ฝ์„ ๋จน์œผ๋ฉด ํ–‰๋ณตํ•ด์ง€๋‚˜์š”?"
25:06
"You take these happy pills, and do you feel happy?"
541
1506278
2679
25:08
And I don't.
542
1508981
1190
์•„๋‹™๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
25:10
But I don't feel sad about having to eat lunch,
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์ ์‹ฌ์„ ๋จน๋Š” ์ผ์— ์šฐ์šธํ•ด์ง€์ง„ ์•Š์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
25:13
and I don't feel sad about my answering machine,
544
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2841
์ž๋™์‘๋‹ต๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์— ์Šฌํผํ•˜๊ฑฐ๋‚˜
25:16
and I don't feel sad about taking a shower.
545
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2198
์ƒค์›Œํ•  ์ƒ๊ฐ์— ์Šฌํผ์ง€์ง€๋„ ์•Š๊ณ ์š”.
25:19
I feel more, in fact, I think,
546
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2603
๊ทธ๋Ÿฐ ๋ฌด๋ ฅ๊ฐ์ด ์—†์–ด์ง€๋‹ˆ
25:21
because I can feel sadness without nullity.
547
1521951
2406
์ €๋Š” ์Šฌํ”„๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฐ์ •์„ ์ œ๋Œ€๋กœ ๋Š๋‚„ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๊ฒŒ ๋˜์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
25:24
I feel sad about professional disappointments,
548
1524704
4206
์ผ์ด ์ž˜ ํ’€๋ฆฌ์ง€ ์•Š์„ ๋•Œ ์‹ค๋ง๊ฐ์„ ๋Š๋ผ๊ณ 
25:28
about damaged relationships,
549
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2284
์‚๊ฑฑ๊ฑฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ์ธ๊ฐ„ ๊ด€๊ณ„๋‚˜
25:31
about global warming.
550
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1517
์ง€๊ตฌ ์˜จ๋‚œํ™”์— ์Šฌํผํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
25:33
Those are the things that I feel sad about now.
551
1533114
2701
์ง€๊ธˆ์€ ๊ทธ๋Ÿฐ ๋ฌธ์ œ์— ์Šฌํ””์„ ๋Š๋ผ๊ฒŒ ๋˜์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
25:35
And I said to myself, well, what is the conclusion?
552
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2710
๊ฒฐ๋ก ์„ ํ˜ผ์ž ๊ณ ๋ฏผํ•ด ๋ณด์•˜๋Š”๋ฐ์š”.
25:38
How did those people who have better lives
553
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2537
์‹ฌ๊ฐํ•œ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์„ ๊ฒช๊ณ ๋„ ๋” ๋‚˜์€ ์‚ถ์„ ์‚ฌ๋Š” ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์€
25:41
even with bigger depression manage to get through?
554
1541134
2530
๊ทธ๊ฒƒ์„ ์–ด๋–ป๊ฒŒ ๊ทน๋ณตํ–ˆ์„๊นŒ?
25:43
What is the mechanism of resilience?
555
1543964
2151
๊ทธ๋“ค์˜ ํšŒ๋ณต ๋Šฅ๋ ฅ์€ ์–ด๋–ป๊ฒŒ ์ž‘์šฉํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ผ๊นŒ?
25:46
And what I came up with over time
556
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1962
์˜ค๋žœ ๊ณ ๋ฏผ ๋์— ๊ฒฐ๋ก ์„ ๋‚ด๋ ธ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
25:48
was that the people who deny their experience,
557
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2826
์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์„ ๊ฒช์€ ๊ณผ๊ฑฐ๋ฅผ ๋ถ€์ •ํ•˜๋Š” ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
25:51
and say, "I was depressed a long time ago,
558
1551419
2016
"๊ทธ๊ฑด ์˜ค๋ž˜ ์ „ ์ผ์ด๋‹ˆ๊นŒ
25:53
I never want to think about it again,
559
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1771
๋‹ค์‹œ๋Š” ์ƒ๊ฐํ•˜๊ณ  ์‹ถ์ง€ ์•Š์•„.
25:55
I'm not going to look at it
560
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1294
์ ˆ๋Œ€ ๋Œ์•„๋ณด์ง€๋„ ์•Š๊ฒ ์–ด.
25:56
and I'm just going to get on with my life,"
561
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2023
์ด์ œ ๋‚ด ์•ž์˜ ์ธ์ƒ์— ์ „๋…ํ•ด์•ผ์ง€."
25:58
ironically, those are the people who are most enslaved by what they have.
562
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4598
ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์—ญ์„ค์ ์œผ๋กœ ์ด๋Ÿฐ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด์•ผ๋ง๋กœ
์ž์‹ ์˜ ์‚ถ์— ๊ตฌ์†๋œ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
26:03
Shutting out the depression strengthens it.
563
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2198
์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์€ ๋ฐ€์–ด๋‚ผ์ˆ˜๋ก ๋”์šฑ ๊ฐ•ํ•ด์ง‘๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
26:05
While you hide from it, it grows.
564
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๋„๋ง์น˜๋ ค ํ• ์ˆ˜๋ก ๋”์šฑ ์ž๋ผ๋‚˜์ฃ .
ํ˜„์žฌ ๋” ๋‚˜์€ ์‚ถ์„ ๊พธ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์€
26:09
And the people who do better
565
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2538
26:11
are the ones who are able to tolerate the fact that they have this condition.
566
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4553
์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์„ ๊ฒช์—ˆ๋‹ค๋Š” ์‚ฌ์‹ค์„
๋ฐ›์•„๋“ค์ด๋Š” ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์„ ๊ฒช์€ ๊ณผ๊ฑฐ๋ฅผ ๋ฐ›์•„๋“ค์ด๋Š” ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด
26:16
Those who can tolerate their depression are the ones who achieve resilience.
567
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์—ฌ๊ธฐ์—์„œ ๋ฒ—์–ด๋‚  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
26:20
So Frank Russakoff said to me,
568
1580516
1612
ํ”„๋žญํฌ ๋ฃจ์‚ฌ์ฝ”ํ”„๊ฐ€ ๋งํ•˜๊ธธ
26:22
"If I had a do-over, I suppose I wouldn't do it this way,
569
1582152
3722
"๋‹ค์‹œ ์ฆ์„ธ๊ฐ€ ์ฐพ์•„์˜จ๋‹ค๋ฉด
์ „๊ณผ ๊ฐ™์€ ๋ฐฉ์‹์œผ๋กœ ๊ฒฌ๋””์ง€๋Š” ์•Š์„ ๊ฒ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
26:25
but in a strange way, I'm grateful for what I've experienced.
570
1585898
3468
์ด์ƒํ•˜๊ฒŒ ๋“ค๋ฆฌ๊ฒ ์ง€๋งŒ, ์ด๋Ÿฐ ์ผ์„ ๊ฒช์—ˆ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒŒ
๊ณ ๋ง™๊ฒŒ ๋Š๊ปด์ง€๊ธฐ๋„ ํ•ด์š”.
26:29
I'm glad to have been in the hospital 40 times.
571
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3324
๋ณ‘์›์— 40๋ฒˆ์ด๋‚˜ ๋“ค๋ฝ๊ฑฐ๋ฆฐ ๊ฒƒ๋„
๋‚ด๊ฒŒ ์‚ฌ๋ž‘์ด ๋ฌด์—‡์ธ์ง€ ๊ฐ€๋ฅด์ณ์ค€ ๊ฒฝํ—˜์ด์—ˆ์–ด์š”.
26:33
It taught me so much about love,
572
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2611
26:35
and my relationship with my parents and my doctors
573
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2921
๋ถ€๋ชจ๋‹˜, ์˜์‚ฌ๋“ค๊ณผ์˜ ๊ด€๊ณ„๋„ ๋‚ด๊ฒ ์ •๋ง ์†Œ์ค‘ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
26:38
has been so precious to me, and will be always."
574
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3546
์•ž์œผ๋กœ๋„ ๊ทธ๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ์œ ์ง€ํ•  ๊ฑฐ๊ณ ์š”."
26:42
And Maggie Robbins said,
575
1602772
1902
๋งค๊ธฐ ๋กœ๋นˆ์Šค์€ ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋งํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
26:44
"I used to volunteer in an AIDS clinic,
576
1604698
2965
"์—์ด์ฆˆ ์น˜๋ฃŒ์†Œ์—์„œ ๋ด‰์‚ฌ ํ™œ๋™์„ ํ–ˆ๋Š”๋ฐ
26:47
and I would just talk and talk and talk,
577
1607687
2990
๋‚ด๊ฐ€ ๋Š์ž„์—†์ด ๋ง์„ ๊ฑธ์–ด๋„
26:50
and the people I was dealing with weren't very responsive, and I thought,
578
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4033
๊ฑฐ๊ธฐ ์žˆ๋Š” ํ™˜์ž๋“ค์€
๋ณ„๋‹ค๋ฅธ ๋ฐ˜์‘์„ ๋ณด์ด์ง€ ์•Š์•˜์ฃ .
26:54
'That's not very friendly or helpful of them.'"
579
1614758
2496
์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด ์ข€ ๋”ฑ๋”ฑํ•˜๊ตฌ๋‚˜ ์‹ถ์—ˆ์–ด์š”.
26:57
(Laughter)
580
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1240
26:58
"And then I realized,
581
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๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ๋‹ค ๋ฌธ๋“ ๊นจ๋‹ฌ์•˜์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
27:00
I realized that they weren't going to do more
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๊ทธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์€ ๋‹จ์ง€ ๋ช‡ ๋ถ„ ๋™์•ˆ
27:02
than make those first few minutes of small talk.
583
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2483
์†Œ์†Œํ•˜๊ฒŒ ์ˆ˜๋‹ค ๋–จ๊ธฐ ์ด์ƒ์€ ์›ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์•„์š”.
27:04
It was simply going to be an occasion
584
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2039
๊ทธ ์‹œ๊ฐ„๋งŒ์€
27:06
where I didn't have AIDS and I wasn't dying,
585
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2949
๊ทธ๋“ค์€ ์—์ด์ฆˆ๋กœ ๊ณ ํ†ต๋ฐ›์œผ๋ฉฐ ์ฃฝ์–ด๊ฐ€๊ณ  ์žˆ์ง€๋งŒ
27:09
but could tolerate the fact that they did
586
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2878
๋‚˜๋Š” ๊ทธ๋ ‡์ง€ ์•Š๋‹ค๋Š” ์‚ฌ์‹ค์„
27:12
and they were.
587
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1215
ํ™˜์ž๋“ค์ด ๋ฐ›์•„๋“ค์ด๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์ด์—ˆ์ฃ .
27:14
Our needs are our greatest assets.
588
1634503
3143
์šฐ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ๋ฌด์–ธ๊ฐ€ ํ•„์š”๋กœ ํ•œ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฑด ๊ต‰์žฅํžˆ ํฐ ์ž์‚ฐ์ด์—์š”.
๋‚ด๊ฒŒ ํ•„์š”ํ•œ ๊ฒƒ์„
27:18
It turns out I've learned to give all the things I need."
589
1638202
4165
๋‚จ๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ์ฃผ๋Š” ๋ฒ•์„ ๋ฐฐ์šด ์…ˆ์ด์ฃ ."
27:24
Valuing one's depression does not prevent a relapse,
590
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3861
์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์— ๊ฐ€์น˜๋ฅผ ๋‘”๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒŒ
์žฌ๋ฐœ์„ ๋ง‰์•„์ฃผ์ง€๋Š” ์•Š์ง€๋งŒ
27:28
but it may make the prospect of relapse
591
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2637
์žฌ๋ฐœ์„ ์˜ˆ์ธกํ•˜๊ฒŒ ํ•ด์ฃผ๊ณ 
27:30
and even relapse itself easier to tolerate.
592
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3513
์žฌ๋ฐœํ•˜๋”๋ผ๋„ ๋ณด๋‹ค ์‰ฝ๊ฒŒ ๊ฒฌ๋”œ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋„๋ก ๋„์™€์ค๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์ด ์–ผ๋งˆ๋‚˜ ์˜๋ฏธ์žˆ๋Š” ๊ฒฝํ—˜์ธ์ง€
27:35
The question is not so much of finding great meaning
593
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์˜๋ฏธ๋ฅผ ๋ถ€์—ฌํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ๋ณด๋‹ค ์ค‘์š”ํ•œ ๊ฑด
27:38
and deciding your depression has been very meaningful.
594
1658686
2571
์ฆ์„ธ๊ฐ€ ๋‹ค์‹œ ์ฐพ์•„์™”์„ ๋•Œ
27:41
It's of seeking that meaning and thinking, when it comes again,
595
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3991
๊ทธ ์˜๋ฏธ๋ฅผ ๋˜์ƒˆ๊ธฐ๋ฉฐ
์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ์ƒ๊ฐํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
27:45
"This will be hellish, but I will learn something from it."
596
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3317
"์ด๋ฒˆ์—๋„ ํž˜๋“ค๊ฒ ์ง€.
ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ๋ญ”๊ฐ€ ๋ฐฐ์šธ ์ ์ด ์žˆ์„ ๊ฑฐ์•ผ."
27:49
I have learned in my own depression
597
1669487
2240
์ €๋Š” ์ œ ์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์„ ํ†ตํ•ด ํ•œ ๊ฐ์ •์˜ ํฌ๊ธฐ๊ฐ€
27:51
how big an emotion can be,
598
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2198
์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ๋‚˜ ํด ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Œ์„
27:53
how it can be more real than facts,
599
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3060
๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์ง„์งœ๋ณด๋‹ค ๋” ์ง„์งœ ๊ฐ™์„ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Œ์„ ๋ฐฐ์› ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ๊ธ์ •์ ์ธ ๊ฐ์ •์„
27:57
and I have found that that experience
600
1677057
2729
27:59
has allowed me to experience positive emotion
601
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2868
๋”์šฑ ์ƒ์ƒํ•˜๊ณ  ์˜จ์ „ํ•˜๊ฒŒ
28:02
in a more intense and more focused way.
602
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๋Š๋‚„ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๊ฒŒ ๋˜์—ˆ์ฃ .
28:06
The opposite of depression is not happiness,
603
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์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์˜ ๋ฐ˜๋Œ€๋Š” ํ–‰๋ณต์ด ์•„๋‹Œ
28:09
but vitality,
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1310
ํ™œ๋ ฅ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
28:11
and these days, my life is vital,
605
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์ง€๊ธˆ์˜ ์ œ ์‚ถ์—” ํ™œ๋ ฅ์ด ๊ฐ€๋“ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
์Šฌํ”ˆ ๋‚ ์—๋„ ๋ง์ด์ฃ .
28:14
even on the days when I'm sad.
606
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2292
28:16
I felt that funeral in my brain,
607
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3115
์ œ ๋จธ๋ฆฟ์†์—๋„ ์žฅ๋ก€ ํ–‰๋ ฌ์ด ์ง€๋‚˜๊ฐ„ ์ ์ด ์žˆ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
28:19
and I sat next to the colossus at the edge of the world,
608
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์„ธ์ƒ์˜ ๋์ž๋ฝ์— ์žˆ๋Š”
ํฐ ๋™์ƒ ์˜†์— ์•‰์•„ ์žˆ์—ˆ์ฃ .
28:24
and I have discovered something inside of myself
609
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3887
ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์ด์ œ๋Š”
์ œ ์•ˆ์˜ ๋ฌด์–ธ๊ฐ€๋ฅผ ์ฐพ์•˜์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
28:28
that I would have to call a soul
610
1708437
2064
๋‹ค์‹œ ๊ทธ ์ง€์˜ฅ์ด ๊ฐ‘์ž๊ธฐ ์ฐพ์•„์˜จ๋‹ค๋ฉด
28:30
that I had never formulated until that day 20 years ago
611
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3513
20๋…„ ์ „์—๋Š” ์—†์—ˆ๋˜ ๋‚˜์˜ ์˜ํ˜ผ์ด๋ผ๋Š” ์กด์žฌ์—๊ฒŒ
28:34
when hell came to pay me a surprise visit.
612
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3301
๋„์›€์„ ์ฒญํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
28:38
I think that while I hated being depressed
613
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3813
์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์— ์‹œ๋‹ฌ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ด ๋„ˆ๋ฌด๋‚˜๋„ ์‹ซ์—ˆ๊ณ 
28:42
and would hate to be depressed again,
614
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2502
์ฆ์ƒ์ด ์žฌ๋ฐœํ•œ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์€ ๋”์šฑ ์‹ซ์ง€๋งŒ
28:45
I've found a way to love my depression.
615
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์šฐ์šธ์ฆ์ด ์ข‹์€ ์ด์œ ๋ฅผ ์ฐพ์•„๋ƒˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
28:47
I love it because it has forced me to find and cling to joy.
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๋ฐ”๋กœ ์ฆ๊ฑฐ์›€์„ ์ฐพ๊ณ  ๊ฑฐ๊ธฐ์— ๋งค๋‹ฌ๋ฆฌ๋„๋ก
์ €๋ฅผ ๋ฐ€์–ด์ฃผ๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
28:52
I love it because each day I decide,
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๋˜ํ•œ ๋งค์ผ๊ฐ™์ด
28:56
sometimes gamely,
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๊ฒŒ์ž„์„ ํ•˜๋“ฏ
28:57
and sometimes against the moment's reason,
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๊ทธ ๋‹น์‹œ์—๋Š” ํƒ€๋‹นํ–ˆ๋˜ ์ด์œ ์™€๋Š” ๋ฐ˜๋Œ€๋กœ
29:00
to cleave to the reasons for living.
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์ด์ œ๋Š” ์‚ถ์— ์• ์ฐฉ์„ ๊ฐ–๋„๋ก ์Šค์Šค๋กœ ๊ฒฐ์ •ํ•˜๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
29:02
And that, I think, is a highly privileged rapture.
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๊ทธ๊ฑด ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋งŒ์ด ๋ˆ„๋ฆด ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋Š” ํ™˜ํฌ๊ฐ€ ์•„๋‹๊นŒ์š”.
๊ณ ๋ง™์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
29:07
Thank you.
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29:08
(Applause)
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(๋ฐ•์ˆ˜)
29:12
Thank you.
624
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1151
29:13
(Applause)
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2372
์ด ์›น์‚ฌ์ดํŠธ ์ •๋ณด

์ด ์‚ฌ์ดํŠธ๋Š” ์˜์–ด ํ•™์Šต์— ์œ ์šฉํ•œ YouTube ๋™์˜์ƒ์„ ์†Œ๊ฐœํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์ „ ์„ธ๊ณ„ ์ตœ๊ณ ์˜ ์„ ์ƒ๋‹˜๋“ค์ด ๊ฐ€๋ฅด์น˜๋Š” ์˜์–ด ์ˆ˜์—…์„ ๋ณด๊ฒŒ ๋  ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๊ฐ ๋™์˜์ƒ ํŽ˜์ด์ง€์— ํ‘œ์‹œ๋˜๋Š” ์˜์–ด ์ž๋ง‰์„ ๋”๋ธ” ํด๋ฆญํ•˜๋ฉด ๊ทธ๊ณณ์—์„œ ๋™์˜์ƒ์ด ์žฌ์ƒ๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๋น„๋””์˜ค ์žฌ์ƒ์— ๋งž์ถฐ ์ž๋ง‰์ด ์Šคํฌ๋กค๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์˜๊ฒฌ์ด๋‚˜ ์š”์ฒญ์ด ์žˆ๋Š” ๊ฒฝ์šฐ ์ด ๋ฌธ์˜ ์–‘์‹์„ ์‚ฌ์šฉํ•˜์—ฌ ๋ฌธ์˜ํ•˜์‹ญ์‹œ์˜ค.

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