Meera Vijayann: Find your voice against gender violence

譯者: Aaron Shoo 審譯者: Adrienne Lin

Talking about empowerment is odd,

談女性「充權」蠻奇特的，

because when we talk about empowerment,

因為講到這個議題時，

what affects us most are the stories.

故事最能引發共鳴。

So I want to begin with an everyday story.

所以我想從日常故事開始。

What is it really like to be a young woman in India?

在印度當年輕女生是什麼感覺？

Now, I've spent the last 27 years of my life

在過去的 27 年人生，

in India, lived in three small towns,

我住過印度的 3 個小鎮、

two major cities,

2 座主要城市，

and I've had several experiences.

所以我有蠻多經驗可以分享。

When I was seven,

我 7 歲的時候，

a private tutor who used to come home

家裡有請家教，

to teach me mathematics molested me.

他來教數學，順便騷擾我。

He would put his hand up my skirt.

他把手伸進我的裙子...

He put his hand up my skirt and told me

他的手伸進我的裙子說，

he knew how to make me feel good.

他知道怎麼讓我「舒服」。

At 17, a boy from my high school

17 歲時，同校一個男生，

circulated an email

狂寄電子郵件給我，

detailing all the sexually aggressive things

細數能在我身上施加的性暴力，

he could do to me

because I didn't pay attention to him.

就因為我不搭理他。

At 19, I helped a friend

19 歲，我幫一個朋友，

whose parents had forcefully married her to an older man

她被父母硬嫁給老男人，

escape an abusive marriage.

逃離家暴。

At 21, when my friend and I were walking

21 歲，

某天下午我和朋友走在街上，

down the road one afternoon,

a man pulled down his pants

一個男人脫下褲子，

and masturbated in front of us.

在我們面前打手槍。

We called people for help, and nobody came.

我們大聲呼救，但沒人理我們。

At 25, when I was walking home one evening,

25 歲，某天晚上在回家路上，

two men on a motorcycle attacked me.

兩個騎機車的男子攻擊我，

I spent two nights in the hospital

我為此住院兩天，

recovering from trauma and injuries.

好不容易才恢復。

So throughout my life, I've seen women —

所以我至此的人生，

我看到女人、家人、朋友、同事，

family, friends, colleagues —

live through these experiences,

遭遇這些經歷

and they seldom talk about it.

卻鮮少談論。

So in simple words, life in India is not easy.

簡而言之，印度居大不易。

But today I'm not going to talk to you about this fear.

但我今天沒有要談住印度多恐怖，

I'm going to talk to you about an interesting path

我想要分享，

我從恐懼中領悟到的出路。

of learning that this fear took me on.

So, what happened one night in December 2012

2012 年 12 月某晚的事件

changed my life.

改變了我的人生。

So a young girl, a 23-year-old student,

一名年輕的 23 歲女學生，

boarded a bus in Delhi with her male friend.

和男生朋友搭上德里的一班公車。

There were six men on the bus, young men

車上還有另外六名年輕男子，

who you might encounter every day in India,

就是印度一般的路人。

and the chilling account of what followed

但接下來發生的事情令人髮指，

was played over and over again

在當地和國際媒體上

in the Indian and international media.

不斷被報導、重播：

This girl was raped repeatedly,

這名女生被輪暴，

forcefully penetrated with a blunt rod,

下體被鐵棒插入，

beaten, bitten, and left to die.

被揍、被咬、被丟下自生自滅。

Her friend was gagged, attacked,

她的朋友被堵住嘴、毆打，

and knocked unconscious.

然後被敲昏。

She died on the 29th of December.

她在 12 月 29 日過世。

And at a time when most of us here

就在大部分的我們，

were preparing to welcome the new year,

滿心歡喜準備迎接新年時，

India plunged into darkness.

印度陷入黑暗。

For the first time in our history,

有史以來第一次，

men and women in Indian cities

印度市區的男男女女，

woke up to the horrific truth

被印度女性地位

about the true state of women in the country.

如此低落的事實給驚醒。

Now, like many other young women,

就像其他女性同胞，

I was absolutely terrified.

我感同身受地恐懼。

我不敢相信這種惡行

I couldn't believe that something like this

could happen in a national capital.

會發生在一國的首都。

I was angry and I was frustrated,

我生氣又無奈，

but most of all, I felt utterly, completely helpless.

但更多的是完全的無力感。

But really, what do you do, right?

但你又能做些什麼呢？

Some write blogs, some ignore it,

有人寫部落格、有人事不關己、

some join protests.

有人去抗議。

我全都做了，

I did all of it. In fact, that was what everyone was doing

事實上，2 年前大家都只做到這樣。

two years ago.

So the media was filled with stories about

所以媒體上充斥著各種

all the horrific deeds

關於印度男人

that Indian men are capable of.

還可以做出什麼惡行的報導。

They were compared to animals,

他們被說成禽獸、

sexually repressed beasts.

性壓抑的猛獸。

In fact, so alien and unthinkable was this event

但離奇、難以想像的是，

in an Indian mind

在印度思維中，

that the response from the Indian media,

從媒體、大眾、政治人物的反應，

public and politicians proved one point:

都只證明了一件事：

No one knew what to do.

沒人知道怎麼辦。

And no one wanted to be responsible for it.

也沒人想承擔這個責任。

In fact, these were a few insensitive comments

甚至還有一些誇張的評論

which were made in the media

出現在媒體版面，

by prominent people

出自一些「名人」，

in response to sexual violence against women in general.

反過頭來指責女性。

So the first one is made by a member of parliament,

第一個是國會議員， [強暴成年女性可以理解，戀童才難以想像]

the second one is made by a spiritual leader,

第二個是宗教領袖， [女性該和強暴犯稱兄道弟]

and the third one was actually the defendants' lawyer

第三則是該案的辯護律師， [被害女生自己不檢點]

when the girl was fighting for her life

被害人當時在和死神搏鬥，

and she passed away.

最後不幸過世。

Now, as a woman watching this day after day,

身為女人，

每天看到這些言論，

I was tired.

我覺得好累。

So as a writer and gender activist,

身為作家和性權運動者，

I have written extensively on women,

我寫過很多女性相關題材，

but this time, I realized it was different,

但這次有所不同，

because a part of me realized

我開始了解到

I was a part of that young woman too,

我跟那名女孩之間的連結，

and I decided I wanted to change this.

而且我想要去改變。

So I did something spontaneous, hasty.

所以我匆匆展開計畫。

I logged on to a citizen journalism platform

我上公民新聞論壇，

called iReport,

它叫「iReport」。

and I recorded a video talking about

然後錄了一支影片講述

what the scene was like in Bangalore.

班加羅爾的現況。

I talked about how I felt,

我說出我的感受，

I talked about the ground realities,

說出現實情況，

and I talked about the frustrations of living in India.

說出生活在印度多令人挫折。

In a few hours, the blog was shared widely,

幾個小時內影片被廣為流傳，

and comments and thoughts poured in

從世界各地湧入評論和分享。

from across the world.

In that moment, a few things occurred to me.

在那一刻，我突然領悟幾件事。

One, technology was always at hand

第一，對我們年輕女性來說，

for many young women like me.

科技觸手可及。

Two, like me, most young women

第二，但大部分女性包括我，

hardly use it to express their views.

不太運用科技表達自己。

Three, I realized for the first time

第三，我第一次發現到，

that my voice mattered.

原來我的發言是重要的。

So in the months that followed,

所以接下來幾個月，

I covered a trail of events in Bangalore

我報導班加羅爾

which had no space in the mainstream news.

其他被主流媒體忽視的事件。

In Cubbon Park, which is a big park in Bangalore,

在班加羅爾的大公園「庫本公園」，

I gathered with over 100 others

有 100 多人聚會，

when groups of young men came forward

一群年輕男生站出來，

to wear skirts to prove that clothing

穿著裙子表態

does not invite rape.

「衣著不是強暴的藉口」。

When I reported about these events,

當我報導這些新聞，

I felt I had charge, I felt like I had a channel

我覺得我在主導，有一個管道

to release all the emotions I had inside me.

讓我釋放內心所有情緒。

I attended the town hall march

我也參加市區的遊行，

when students held up signs saying

學生們舉著標語說：

"Kill them, hang them."

「判他們死、絞刑！」

"You wouldn't do this to your mothers or sisters."

「你會對媽媽、姊妹做出這種事嗎？」

I went to a candlelight vigil

我還去了燭光晚會。

where citizens gathered together

大家聚在一起，

to talk about the issue of sexual violence openly,

打開天窗討論性別暴力。

and I recorded a lot of blogs

我記錄了很多部落格，

in response to how worrying the situation was

顯示當時印度的的情況

in India at that point.

有多令人擔憂。

["I am born with sisters and cousin who now live in cities and abroad but they never talk to me or complain about their daily difficulties like you say"]

Now, the reactions confused me.

我對有些留言感到不解。

While supportive comments poured in from across the world,

儘管世界各地湧入支持的評論，

as did vicious ones.

還是有不少負評。

So some called me a hypocrite.

有人說我虛偽，

Some called me a victim, a rape apologist.

有人說我被強暴過，

Some even said I had a political motive.

有人還說我只是想參選。

But this one comment kind of describes

但螢幕上這個留言恰好說出了

what we are discussing here today.

今天我們要討論的點。 [我的女性親友都沒有妳這些抱怨欸]

But I was soon to learn that this was not all.

我很快了解到這還沒完。

As empowered as I felt

當我越感覺到

with the new liberty that this

身為公民記者的自由

citizen journalism channel gave me,

帶給我的力量，

I found myself in an unfamiliar situation.

越感覺到自己在陌生的處境。

So sometime last August, I logged onto Facebook

去年 8 月當我登入臉書，

and I was looking through my news feed,

然後在看新聞轉貼的時候，

and I noticed there was a link

我發現一個連結，

that was being shared by my friends.

是我朋友分享的。

I clicked on the link; it led me back

我點進去看，

是一名美國女孩寫的報導，

to a report uploaded by an American girl

called Michaela Cross.

她叫米奇菈‧克羅斯。

The report was titled,

新聞的標題是

"India: The story you never wanted to hear."

「印度：你絕不會想聽的故事」。

And in this report, she recounted her firsthand

在報導中，她回憶親身

account of facing sexual harassment in India.

在印度被性騷擾的經驗。

She wrote, "There is no way to prepare for the eyes,

寫道，「完全防不勝防，

the eyes that every day stared

那些每天盯著我，

with such entitlement at my body,

透露著佔有慾的眼神，

with no change of expression

就算跟我對到眼，

whether I met their gaze or not.

也絲毫不收斂。

Walking to the fruit seller's or the tailor's,

去買水果或買衣服，

I got stares so sharp

那些貪婪的眼光

that they sliced away bits of me piece by piece."

好像要把我生吞活剝。

She called India a traveler's heaven and a woman's hell.

她稱印度為「觀光勝地，女性地獄」。

She said she was stalked, groped,

她說她被跟蹤、吃豆腐、猥褻。

and masturbated at.

Now, late that evening, the report went viral.

報導在那天晚上被瘋狂轉貼。

It was on news channels across the world.

全球的新聞頻道都在報導。

Everyone was discussing it.

每個人都在討論。

It had over a million views,

超過 100 萬次的點閱，

a thousand comments and shares,

1000 則評論和分享。

and I found myself witnessing

我發現自己觀察到了

a very similar thing.

非常相似的情況。

The media was caught in this vicious cycle

媒體是惡性循環的其中一環，

of opinion and outburst

充斥意見、輿論、不了了之等等。

and no outcome whatsoever.

So that night, as I sat wondering

那天晚上我就在想，

how I should respond,

我要怎麼回應？

I found myself filled with doubt.

我充滿疑惑。

You see, as a writer, I approached this issue

身為作家，

我以觀察者的身分接觸這個議題；

as an observer,

as an Indian, I felt embarrassment and disbelief,

身為印度人，我感到羞愧和質疑；

and as an activist, I looked at it as a defender of rights,

身為活躍份子，我將其視為「維權」；

but as a citizen journalist,

但身為公民記者，

I suddenly felt very vulnerable.

我覺得很受傷。

I mean, here she was, a young woman

我的意思是，眼前的年輕女子，

who was using a channel to talk about

用某個管道說出

her experience just as I was,

和我差不多的經驗，

and yet I felt unsettled.

但受到的注目天差地別。

You see, no one ever tells you

你看，不曾有人告訴你

that true empowerment comes from giving yourself

真正的「充權」來自於

讓自己開始思考和行動。

the permission to think and act.

Empowerment is often made to sound as if

「充權」好像被單純塑造成

it's an ideal, it's a wonderful outcome.

一個理想或一顆甜美的果實。

When we talk about empowerment, we often

當我們說到「充權」，

通常會說給弱勢管道

talk about giving people access to materials,

giving them access to tools.

去接觸資源或工具。

But the thing is, empowerment is an emotion.

但事實是，「充權」是一種情緒、

It's a feeling.

是一種感覺。

The first step to empowerment

「充權」的第一步

is to give yourself the authority,

是讓自己做主、

the key to independent will,

培養獨立思考的意願，

and for women everywhere,

對所有女人來說，

no matter who we are or where we come from,

無論身在何方或來自何處，

that is the most difficult step.

這是最困難的一步。

We fear the sound of our own voice,

我們害怕自己的聲音，

for it means admission, but it is this that gives us

因為這意味著尋求認同，但這就是

the power to change our environment.

讓我們改變周遭的力量。

Now in this situation where I was faced

我現在面臨的處境，

with so many different kinds of realities,

充斥著各種現實。

I was unsure how to judge,

我沒辦法妄下定論，

because I didn't know what it would mean for me.

因為不知道這會對我造成什麼影響。

I feared to judge because I didn't know what it would be

我不敢評斷因為我不知道

if I didn't support the same view as this girl.

不支持這個女孩的後果。

I didn't know what it would mean for me

我不知道對我會造成什麼影響，

if I was challenging someone else's truth.

如果我去挑戰別人的價值。

But yet, it was simple.

但無論如何，

I had to make a decision:

我必須做決定：

Should I speak up or should I stay quiet?

我要大聲說還是裝聾作啞？

So after a lot of thought,

經過一陣思索，

I recorded a video blog in response,

我上傳了一段錄影作為回應。

and I told Michaela, well,

我跟米奇菈說，

there are different sides to India,

印度有很多面向，

and I also tried to explain

我試著解釋

that things would be okay

其實情況沒那麼遭，

and I expressed my regret for what she had faced.

也表達我對她的遭遇感到遺憾。

And a few days later, I was invited to talk

幾天後，我受邀和她

on air with her,

一起上節目訪談。

and for the first time, I reached out to this girl

我第一次有機會見到她，

who I had never met, who was so far away,

一個沒有機會遇見、如此遙遠，

but yet I felt so close to.

卻又如此相近的女孩。

Since this report came to light,

因為她的報導，

more young people than ever

有更多的年輕人

were discussing sexual harassment on the campus,

討論校園中的性騷擾。

and the university that Michaela belonged to

米奇菈的大學，

gave her the assistance she needed.

也給了她需要的協助。

The university even took measures

學校甚至想辦法

to train its students to equip them

訓練他們的學生

with the skills that they need

學習必備技能，

to confront challenges such as harassment,

以面對騷擾的情況。

and for the first the time, I felt I wasn't alone.

我第一次感覺到我不孤獨。

You see, if there's anything that I've learned

如果在過去數年，

as an active citizen journalist

身為活躍的公民記者，

over the past few years,

有讓我學到什麼，

it is our dire lack as a society to actively find

就是這個社會上，讓我們的聲音

avenues where our voices can be heard.

能被聽見的管道有多貧瘠。

We don't realize that when we are standing up,

我們沒有察覺當我們挺身而出，

we are not just standing up as individuals,

我們不只是作為一個個體，

we are standing up for our communities,

也是為我們的社群、朋友、同儕發聲。

our friends, our peers.

Most of us say that women are denied their rights,

很多人說女人被剝奪權利，

but the truth is, oftentimes,

但事實上絕大部分，

women deny themselves these rights.

是女人自己放棄權利。

In a recent survey in India,

最近印度有一項調查，

95 percent of the women who work in I.T.,

95% 在資訊業、航空業、

醫院和客服中心上班的女性，

aviation, hospitality and call centers,

said they didn't feel safe returning home alone

表示對於在夜晚或深夜

after work in the late hours or in the evening.

下班後獨自回家感到不安全。

In Bangalore, where I come from,

在我的家鄉班加羅爾，

this number is 85 percent.

比例是 85% 。

In rural areas in India,

在印度的鄉村地區，

if anything is to go by the recent

最近就有一些比如說

gang rapes in Badaun and acid attacks in Odisha

步道恩縣的輪暴、

and Aligarh are supposed to go by,

奧里薩邦和阿格里爾的潑酸事件，

we need to act really soon.

我們要快點行動。

Don't get me wrong,

但別會錯意，

the challenges that women will face

女性要說出自己的故事，

in telling their stories is real,

還是會碰到困難。

but we need to start pursuing

我們要開始鼓勵她們，

and trying to identify mediums

試著分辨能運用的媒體管道，

to participate in our system

and not just pursue the media blindly.

而不是盲目地依靠媒體。

Today, more women than ever

今日有更多的女性

are standing up and questioning

挺身而出並且質疑

the government in India,

印度政府，

and this is a result of that courage.

這就是勇敢的表現。

There is a sixfold increase in women

檢舉性騷擾的女性多了 6 倍，

reporting harassment,

and the government passed

政府也在 2013 年通過了

the Criminal Law (Amendment) Act in 2013

刑法增修法案，

to protect women against sexual assault.

保障婦女遠離性侵。

As I end this talk,

這場演講的最後，

I just want to say

我只是想說，

that I know a lot of us in this room have our secrets,

我知道在座的各位都有秘密，

but let us speak up.

但讓我們大聲說出來。

Let us fight the shame and talk about it.

不要怕丟臉、勇敢說出來，

It could be a platform, a community,

無論是在有形的平台、社群，

your loved one, whoever or whatever you choose,

或是跟你所愛的人分享，

but let us speak up.

讓我們開始發聲。

The truth is, the end to this problem

事實上，

這個問題的解答就在我們身上。

begins with us.

Thank you.

謝謝！

(Applause)

（掌聲）