How to turn off work thoughts during your free time | Guy Winch

Translator: Ivana Korom Reviewer: Krystian Aparta

翻译人员: Wanting Zhong 校对人员: Junrui Zheng

I wanted to be a psychologist since I was a teenager,

自打青少年时期， 我就想当一个心理学家，

and I spent years pursuing that one goal.

我花了多年时间 朝这个目标奋斗。

I opened my private practice as soon as I was licensed.

我一拿到执照 就立刻开了自己的私人诊所。

It was a risky move, not getting a day job at a hospital or a clinic,

我没有在医院或诊所全职工作， 而是选择了这一步险棋，

but within one year, my practice was doing quite well

不过一年之内， 我的诊所经营得很好，

and I was making more money than I ever made before.

我从来没有赚过这么多钱。

Of course, I was a full-time student my entire life.

当然，我以前一直是个全职学生。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

I could have worked at McDonald's

我要是

去麦当劳打工， 赚的钱也会比以往都多。

and made more money than I ever made before.

That one-year mark came on a Friday night in July.

我的工作一周年纪念日 在一个七月的星期五晚上来临。

I walked home to my apartment

我走回公寓，

and got into the elevator with a neighbor who was a doctor in the ER.

和一个在急诊室做医生的邻居 乘上了同一个电梯。

The elevator rose,

电梯向上攀升，

then it shuddered and stalled between floors.

然后随着一个震颤， 它在两层楼之间停住了。

And the man who dealt with emergencies for a living

这个以处理紧急状况为生的男人

began poking at the buttons and banging on the door, saying,

开始猛戳电梯按钮， 拼命砸电梯门，喊道：

“这是我的噩梦， 这是我的噩梦！”

"This is my nightmare, this is my nightmare!"

And I was like, "And this is my nightmare."

我心想：“这才是我的噩梦。”

(Laughter)

（笑声）

I felt terrible afterwards, though.

然而我之后感觉很糟糕。

Because I wasn't panicked

因为我没有惊慌失措，

and I knew what to say to calm him down.

而我知道我可以对他说什么 让他冷静下来。

I was just too depleted to do it,

我只是觉得身体被掏空，

I had nothing left to give, and that confused me.

我什么都做不了， 这让我感到十分困惑。

After all, I was finally living my dream,

毕竟，我终于能够过上梦想的生活，

so why wasn't I happy?

那我为什么并不快乐？

Why did I feel so burned out?

我为什么会觉得筋疲力竭？

For a few terrible weeks,

接下来几个糟糕透顶的星期里，

I questioned whether I'd made a mistake.

我怀疑自己是否犯下了错误。

What if I had chosen the wrong profession?

如果我入错了行该怎么办？

What if I had spent my entire life pursuing the wrong career?

如果我耗尽一辈子， 追求的却是错误的职业怎么办？

But then I realized, no, I still loved psychology.

但我随之意识到， 不，我还热爱心理学。

The problem wasn't the work I did in my office.

问题并不是出在 我在办公室里进行的工作。

It was the hours I spent ruminating about work

问题在于，当我在家的时候， 我仍然花费不少时间

when I was home.

反复琢磨我的工作。

I closed the door to my office every night,

每晚我都锁上办公室的门，

but the door in my head remained wide-open

但我头脑中的门一直敞开着，

and the stress just flooded in.

压力就这样源源不绝地涌进来。

That's the interesting thing about work stress.

这就是工作压力的有趣之处。

We don't really experience much of it at work.

我们在上班时并不会感觉到 太多工作压力。

We're too busy.

那时我们太忙了。

We experience it outside of work,

我们在工作时间之外 感受到了工作压力，

when we are commuting,

当我们在通勤路上，

when we're home,

当我们回到家里，

when we're trying to rejuvenate.

当我们试图恢复活力时。

It is important to recover in our spare time,

在我们的空闲时间 进行恢复是很重要的，

to de-stress and do things we enjoy,

我们需要释放压力， 做一些自己喜欢的事情，

and the biggest obstruction we face in that regard is ruminating.

而在这方面我们面对的最大障碍 就是反刍式思考。

Because each time we do it,

因为我们每当这么做时，

we're actually activating our stress response.

其实是在激活我们 的压力反应。

Now, to ruminate means to chew over.

反刍的意思是反复咀嚼。

The word refers to how cows digest their food.

这个用词指的是 奶牛消化食物的方式。

For those of you unfamiliar with the joys of cow digestion,

如果你们不熟悉 奶牛消化的乐趣的话，

cows chew,

奶牛咀嚼食物，

then they swallow,

然后吞咽下去，

then they regurgitate it back up and chew it again.

然后它们把食物吐回嘴里， 再咀嚼一次。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

It's disgusting.

非常恶心。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

But it works for cows.

但对奶牛来说十分有用。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

It does not work for humans.

对人类来说并没有用。

Because what we chew over are the upsetting things,

因为我们反复咀嚼的 是让人烦躁的事情，

the distressing things,

让人苦恼的事情，

and we do it in ways that are entirely unproductive.

并且我们反复咀嚼的方式 是完全没有收益可言的。

It's the hours we spend obsessing about tasks we didn't complete

我们花费数个小时 为我们没有完成的任务困扰，

or stewing about tensions with a colleague,

为和同事的紧张关系闷闷不乐，

or anxiously worrying about the future,

为未来忧心如焚，

or second-guessing decisions we've made.

或者为已经做出的决定惴惴不安。

Now there's a lot of research on how we think about work

关于我们在非工作时间里 如何思考工作

when we are not at work,

有大量研究，

and the findings are quite alarming.

而这些研究的发现 非常骇人。

Ruminating about work,

反复咀嚼工作，

replaying the same thoughts and worries over and over again,

一遍又一遍地 回放同样的想法和担忧

significantly disrupts our ability to recover and recharge in the off hours.

会显著降低我们在闲暇时间 恢复与充电的能力。

The more we ruminate about work when we're home,

我们在家时 反思工作的时间越长，

the more likely we are to experience sleep disturbances,

我们就越有可能 经历睡眠障碍，

to eat unhealthier foods

吃更加不健康的食物，

and to have worse moods.

情绪也更加糟糕。

It may even increase our risk of cardiovascular disease

它甚至有可能 增加心血管疾病的风险，

and of impairing our executive functioning,

并且危害我们（对工作记忆、决策、 抽象思考）的管控功能，

the very skill sets we need to do our jobs well.

这却恰恰是在工作中 不可或缺的能力。

Not to mention the toll it takes on our relationships and family lives,

更别提对我们的亲密关系 和家庭生活造成的负担，

because people around us can tell we're checked out and preoccupied.

因为我们身边的人能察觉 我们魂不守舍、心不在焉。

Now, those same studies found

同样的研究还发现，

that while ruminating about work when we're home

虽然在家时反刍工作

damages our emotional well-being,

会损害我们的情绪健康，

thinking about work in creative or problem-solving ways does not.

从富有创意的或者解决问题的角度 思考工作却并不会造成危害。

Because those kinds of thinking do not elicit emotional distress

原因在于，这些思考方式 并不会触发情绪困扰，

and, more importantly, they're in our control.

更重要的是，这些思考 在我们的掌控之内。

We can decide whether to respond to an email

我们可以决定 是现在回复电子邮件

or leave it till morning,

还是留到第二天早上再说，

or whether we want to brainstorm about work projects that excite us.

或者是否想围绕让我们兴奋 的工作项目展开头脑风暴。

But ruminations are involuntary.

但反刍思考是不由自主的。

They're intrusive.

它们是侵扰性的。

They pop into our head when we don't want them to.

它们在我们不情愿时 窜进我们的脑海里。

They upset us when we don't want to be upset.

它们在我们不想烦恼时 让我们心烦。

They switch us on when we are trying to switch off.

它们在我们试图下班休息时 强行让我们启动工作状态。

And they are very difficult to resist,

另外，它们很难抗拒，

because thinking of all our unfinished tasks feels urgent.

因为思考所有未完成的工作 感觉很有紧迫感。

Anxiously worrying about the future feels compelling.

为未来忧心如焚 感觉非常迫切。

Ruminating always feels like we're doing something important,

反复思考会带来 仿佛在做重要事情的错觉，

when in fact, we're doing something harmful.

但事实上，我们做的是 有害的事情。

And we all do it far more than we realize.

而我们这么做的频率 远比我们意识到的高。

Back when I was burned out,

当我过劳的那会儿，

I decided to keep a journal for a week

我决定花一个星期时间写日志，

and document exactly how much time I spent ruminating.

准确记录我花在反刍思考上的时间。

And I was horrified by the results.

结果让我震惊。

It was over 30 minutes a night when I was trying to fall asleep.

每晚试图入睡时，反刍会 占去 30 分钟以上的时间。

My entire commute, to and from my office --

还有往返办公室的 全部通勤时间——

that was 45 minutes a day.

也就是一天 45 分钟。

Totally checked out for 20 minutes

在同事家的晚餐聚会时，

during the dinner party at a colleague's house.

有整整 20 分钟魂游天外。

Never got invited there again.

我之后再也没被邀请过。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

And 90 minutes during a friend's "talent show"

还有在朋友的“才艺表演秀”中 的 90 分钟，

that, coincidentally, was 90 minutes long.

这个表演秀恰好也就 90 分钟。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

In total, that week, it was almost 14 hours.

那个星期的反刍时间加起来 总计近 14 个小时。

That's how much "downtime" I was losing

那就是我损失的“休息时间”，

to something that actually increased my stress.

反而花在了增加压力上。

Try keeping a journal for one week.

各位也可以尝试， 用一个星期时间记录日志。

See how much you do it.

看看你在反刍思考上花费了多少时间。

That's what made me realize that I still loved my work.

那让我意识到， 我仍然热爱我的工作。

But ruminating was destroying that love

但是反刍思考摧毁了我的热爱，

and it was destroying my personal life, too.

同时也摧毁了我的个人生活。

So I read every study I could find,

于是我如饥似渴地 阅读了所有相关论文，

and I went to war against my ruminations.

并开始和我的反刍思考做斗争。

Now, habit change is hard.

改变习惯是很困难的。

It took real diligence to catch myself ruminating each time,

我只能异常刻苦， 才能在每次反刍思考时克制自己，

and real consistency to make the new habits stick.

并且异常坚持， 才能让新习惯得以养成。

But eventually, they did.

但最终，我成功了。

I won my war against ruminating,

我战胜了我的反刍思考习惯，

and I'm here to tell you how you can win yours.

而今天我在这里，想要告诉大家 如何赢得你自己的战斗。

First, you need clear guardrails.

首先，你需要清晰的防护系统。

You have to define when you switch off every night,

你必须明确定义 每晚什么时候下班，

when you stop working.

什么时候停止工作，

And you have to be strict about it.

并且必须严格遵守。

The rule I made to myself at the time was that I was done at 8pm.

当时我给自己定的规则是， 每晚 8 点就结束工作，

And I forced myself to stick to it.

并且强迫自己遵守这个规则。

Now people say to me,

有人会对我说，

"Really? You didn't return a single email after 8pm?

“你确定？你晚上 8 点后 从来不回一封邮件？

You didn't even look at your phone?"

甚至连手机都不看一眼？”

No, not once.

没错，一次都没有。

Because it was the '90s, we didn't have smartphones.

因为那是 90 年代， 我们还没有智能手机。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

I got my first smartphone in 2007.

我在 2007 年买了第一台智能手机。

You know, the iPhone had just come out,

那时 iPhone 刚问世，

and I wanted a phone that was cool and hip.

我想要一台又酷又时髦的手机。

I got a BlackBerry.

我买了一台黑莓。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

I was excited, though,

不过我很兴奋，

you know, my first thought was, "I get my emails wherever I am."

我第一个想法是， “我随时随地都能收邮件了。”

And 24 hours later,

24 个小时之后，

I was like, "I get my emails wherever I am."

我就开始变得沮丧了。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

I mean, battling ruminations was hard enough

我是说，当反刍思考 只是入侵我们的思维时，

when they just invaded our thoughts.

已经很难对付了。

But now they have this Trojan horse,

但现在它们有了这个特洛伊木马，

our phones, to hide within.

即我们的手机，可以藏在里面。

And each time we just look at our phone after hours,

下班后，每次我们只需看一眼手机，

we can be reminded of work

就能想到工作，

and ruminative thoughts can slip out

反刍思考便能偷偷溜出来，

and slaughter our evening or weekend.

在晚上和周末大开杀戒。 【注：化用特洛伊木马的典故】

So, when you switch off,

所以，当你下班时，

switch off your email notifications.

请关掉你的邮件提醒。

And if you have to check them, decide on when to do it,

如果你不得不查邮件， 决定好什么时候查

so it doesn't interfere with your plans,

才不会扰乱你的计划，

and do it only then.

并且只在这个决定好 的时间查邮件。

Cell phones aren't the only way technology is empowering rumination,

手机并不是科技助长 反刍思考的唯一途径，

because we have an even bigger fight coming.

因为我们面对的是更为严峻的战斗。

Telecommuting has increased 115 percent over the past decade.

过去十年内，远程办公的情况 增长了 115%，

And it's expected to increase even more dramatically going forward.

并且可以预见 其未来的增长会更加迅猛。

More and more of us are losing our physical boundary

越来越多人在渐渐失去

家与工作之间的物理界线。

between work and home.

And that means that reminders of work

这意味着和工作相关的事项

will be able to trigger ruminations from anywhere in our home.

可以从我们家中任何地方 触发反刍式思考。

When we lack a physical boundary between work and home,

当我们缺乏工作与家 之间的物理界线时，

we have to create a psychological one.

我们必须创造出一条心理防线。

We have to trick our mind

我们必须对自己的头脑使点小伎俩，

into defining work and nonwork times and spaces.

让它定义出区分工作和非工作 的时间与地点。

So here's how you do that.

你可以这么做：

First, create a defined work zone in your home,

首先，在家里创造一个 设定好的工作空间，

even if it's tiny,

无论多小都可以，

and try to work only there.

并且尽量只在那里工作。

Try not to work on the living room couch

尽量不在客厅沙发

or on the bed

或者床上工作，

because really, those areas should be associated

因为说真的，那些区域 只应该属于

生活和……上床。

with living and ... bedding.

(Laughter)

（笑声）

Next, when you're working from home,

第二，当你在家中工作时，

wear clothes you only wear when you're working.

穿上只在工作时穿的衣服，

And then at the end of the day,

而在一天结束时，

change clothes,

换一套衣服，

and use music and lighting to shift the atmosphere

并用音乐和照明把氛围

from work to home.

从工作切换到居家模式。

Make it a ritual.

把它变成一种仪式。

Now, some of you might think that's silly.

你们中有些人可能会认为这很傻。

That changing clothes and lighting

你们可能觉得，换衣服和改变照明

will convince my mind I'm no longer at work.

怎么可能会说服我的头脑 我已经没在工作了。

Trust me, your mind will fall for it.

请相信我，你们的脑子会中计的。

Because we are really smart, our mind is really stupid.

因为我们很聪明， 我们的脑子很蠢。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

It falls for random associations all the time, right?

它整天掉进各种关联的圈套，不是吗？

I mean, that's why Pavlov's dog began drooling at the sound of a bell.

这就是为什么巴甫洛夫的狗 在听到铃声时会开始流口水，

And why TED speakers begin sweating at the sight of a red circle.

以及为什么 TED 演讲者 在看到红色圆圈时会开始出汗。

(Laughter)

（笑声) 【注：舞台上标注的规定演讲区】

Now those things will help,

这些方法能有所帮助，

but ruminations will still invade.

但是反刍式思考仍会入侵。

And when they do, you have to convert them

当它们入侵时， 你必须把它们转换成

into productive forms of thinking, like problem-solving.

具有效益的思考形式， 比如解决问题。

My patient Sally is a good example.

我的病人萨莉是一个很好的例子。

Sally was given the promotion of a lifetime,

萨莉得到了生涯中最顶级的提拔，

but it came with a price.

但它伴随着相应的代价。

She was no longer able to pick up her daughter

今后她将没法

每天去接女儿放学了，

from school every day,

and that broke her heart.

这让她无比心碎。

So she came up with a plan.

于是她想出了一个方案。

Every Tuesday and Thursday, Sally left work early,

每周二和周四， 萨莉会提前下班，

picked up her daughter from school,

到学校接女儿，

played with her, fed her, bathed her and put her to bed.

陪她玩耍，喂她吃饭， 帮她洗澡，哄她入睡。

And then she went back to the office

然后萨莉再回到公司，

and worked past midnight to catch up.

工作到半夜，弥补拉下的事务。

Only, Sally's rumination journal indicated

唯一的问题是， 萨莉的反刍思考日志显示，

she spent almost every minute of her quality time with her daughter

她在和女儿一起的宝贵时间里， 几乎每一分钟

ruminating about how much work she had to do.

都在反复思考 还有多少工作要做。

Ruminations often deny us our most precious moments.

反刍式思考常常会剥夺 我们最珍贵的时光。

Sally's rumination, "I have so much work to do,"

萨莉的反刍思考， “我还有好多活要干”，

is a very common one.

是很常见的。

And like all of them,

而和所有反刍思考一样，

it's useless and it's harmful,

它是无用的、有害的，

because we'd never think it when we're at work, getting stuff done.

因为我们在上班完成工作时 从来不会有这些想法。

We think it when we're outside of work,

这些想法在我们的 工作时间之外冒出来，

when we're trying to relax or do things that we find meaningful,

在我们试图放松 或者做对我们有意义的事情时，

like playing with our children,

比如和孩子玩耍，

or having a date night with our partner.

或者和伴侣的约会之夜。

To convert a ruminative thought into a productive one,

为了把一个反刍性想法 变成有生产性的思维，

you have to pose it as a problem to be solved.

你必须把它塑造成 一个待解决的问题。

The problem-solving version of "I have so much work to do"

“我还有好多活要干” 的解决问题版本

is a scheduling question.

是一个时间规划问题。

Like, "Where in my schedule can I fit the tasks that are troubling me?"

例如，“我可以把困扰我的任务 塞进日程表的哪个地方？”

Or, "What can I move in my schedule to make room for this more urgent thing?"

或者，“我的可以变动哪些日程， 给这件更紧急的事腾出时间？”

Or even, "When do I have 15 minutes to go over my schedule?"

甚至可以是，“我什么时候能 拿出 15 分钟过一遍我的日程？”

All those are problems that can be solved.

这些都是可以解决的问题。

"I have so much work to do" is not.

“我还有好多活要干” 并不是。

Battling rumination is hard,

和反刍式思考战斗是艰难的，

but if you stick to your guardrails,

但如果你坚守你的防护系统，

if you ritualize the transition from work to home,

如果你把从工作到居家的 转变仪式化，

and if you train yourself to convert ruminations

如果你训练自己 把反刍式思考

into productive forms of thinking,

转换成有生产力的思维方式，

you will succeed.

你会成功的。

Banishing ruminations truly enhanced my personal life,

消除反刍式思考 真的改善了我的个人生活，

but what it enhanced even more

但它提升更多的

was the joy and satisfaction I get from my work.

是我从工作中获得 的喜悦和满足。

Ground zero for creating a healthy work-life balance

要创造健康的工作生活平衡，其原点

is not in the real world.

并不在现实世界里，

It's in our head.

而是在我们的头脑里，

It's with ruminating.

和反刍式思考息息相关。

If you want to reduce your stress and improve your quality of life,

如果你想减轻压力， 改进生活品质，

you don't necessarily have to change your hours or your job.

你不一定要调整工时 或者换工作。

You just have to change how you think.

你只需要改变自己的思维方式。

Thank you.

谢谢大家。

(Applause)

（掌声）