Ben Katchor's comics of bygone New York

翻译人员: Yvonne Fu 校对人员: Amy Zerotus

I'm going to read a few strips.

我马上会朗读的一些连环漫画。

These are, most of these are

它们中的很多

from a monthly page I do

都选自我每月刊登在

in and architecture and design magazine

一本关于建筑设计杂志上的小故事。

called Metropolis.

那本杂志叫《摩登都市》。

And the first story is called

第一个故事叫做

"The Faulty Switch."

《开关的小瑕疵》

Another beautifully designed new building

又一个设计精良的新建筑

ruined by the sound of a common wall light switch.

被一个再平常不过的电灯开关的启动声给毁了。

It's fine during the day

白天的时候一切都很美好，

when the main rooms are flooded with sunlight.

阳光洒满了你的房间。

But at dusk

但当黄昏降临

everything changes.

一切都变了。

The architect spent hundreds of hours

建筑师愿意花很多时间

designing the burnished brass switchplates

为新的办公大楼

for his new office tower.

设计这些抛光的铜制开关板

And then left it to a contractor

然后让承包商

to install these 79-cent switches behind them.

在这些精致的开关板后装上79美分的开关

We know instinctively where to reach

我们本能地知道，当我们走进这间黑屋子时，

when we enter a dark room.

该按哪里打开开关。

We automatically throw the little nub of plastic upward.

接着，我们就自然而然地把那小小的按钮向上一摁

But the sound we are greeted with,

但是，当房间溢满

as the room is bathed in the simulated glow

如傍晚阳光般昏暗的光线的时候

of late-afternoon light,

那迎接我们的一声响

recalls to mind

却让人想起了

a dirty men's room

一间希腊咖啡店后面

in the rear of a Greek coffee shop.

那不甚整洁的男洗手间。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

This sound colors our first impression of any room;

这声响让我们对任何一间房的印象都那样先入为主，

it can't be helped.

改都改不了。

But where does this sound,

但是这我们称之为“咯嗒”的声响

commonly described as a click, come from?

到底从何而来呢？

Is it simply the byproduct of a

它仅仅是

crude mechanical action?

一个粗糙机械制作的副产品？

Or is it an imitation

或者对我们

of one half the set of sounds we make

抒发不满的一种声音的一半

to express disappointment?

所进行的模仿？

The often dental consonant

我们不满的时候经常用它

of no Indo-European language.

在印欧语系中可找不到词源。

Or is it the amplified sound

还是，那其实是蟑螂大脑中

of a synapse firing

触突闪现火花那一刹那

in the brain of a cockroach?

所产生的声响的放大？

In the 1950s they tried their best

在二十世纪五十年代，科学家们曾尽力

to muffle this sound

用汞制的开关

with mercury switches

和静音的按钮

and silent knob controls.

来消除这声响。

But today these improvements

但在今天开来，这些改进

seem somehow inauthentic.

倒显得不地道

The click is the modern

这“咯嗒”声 其实是现代社会

triumphal clarion

胜利的号角。

proceeding us through life,

让我们的生活向前迈进，

announcing our entry into every lightless room.

宣告我们向每一个无光的暗房进军

The sound made flicking a wall switch off

而我们把墙上开关关上的那一声响

is of a completely different nature.

内涵就完全不同了

It has a deep melancholy ring.

它蕴含着深深地抑郁声调。

Children don't like it.

孩子们不喜欢它。

It's why they leave lights on around the house. (Laughter)

所以总爱让房间亮着。

Adults find it comforting.

大人们却能聊以慰藉。

But wouldn't it be an easy matter

但把墙上的开关接通电源

to wire a wall switch

不是很容易的事儿吗？

so that it triggers the muted horn of a steam ship?

这样就能够启动蒸汽船静默的汽笛？

Or the recorded crowing of a rooster?

或唤醒公鸡清晨的报晓？

Or the distant peel of thunder?

还是爆破远方的一声惊雷？

Thomas Edison went through

爱迪生也是在尝试过

thousands of unlikely substances

成千上万不同的物质之后

before he came upon the right one

才找到了真正适合做灯丝的物质，

for the filament of his electric light bulb.

从而完成了他的电灯发明。

Why have we settled so quickly

为什么我们要如此迅速地屈就于

for the sound of its switch?

那开关不完美的“咯嗒”声响呢？

That's the end of that.

这个故事讲完了。

(Applause)

（掌声）

The next story is called

下一个故事叫作

"In Praise of the Taxpayer."

《纳税人的荣耀》。

That so many of the city's most venerable taxpayers

这个城市里，很多受人尊崇的纳税人

have survived yet another commercial building boom,

又逃过了一次拆旧楼建新的商业大楼浪潮的劫难。

is cause for celebration.

他们为此庆祝。

These one or two story structures,

设计这些一两层的建筑

designed to yield only enough income

也只期望它们获得的收入

to cover the taxes on the land

能付得起

on which they stand,

土地租金就行了，

were not meant to be permanent buildings.

并不把它们当做这长久的建筑。

Yet for one reason or another

然而由于种种原因

they have confounded the efforts of developers

这些低层建筑常常困扰开发商

to be combined into lots

让他们不知道该如何把这些零星的点组合成

suitable for high-rise construction.

一块适合高层建筑的地皮。

Although they make no claim to architectural beauty,

虽然不能说这些小楼房有什么建筑设计的美感

they are, in their perfect temporariness,

但是，在它们这短暂存在的这段时间里，

a delightful alternative

的确是钢筋水泥高楼林立的城市中

to the large-scale structures

一道亮丽的风景线，

that might someday take their place.

尽管最终要被取代。

The most perfect examples

最突出的例子

occupy corner lots.

就是拐角处的小楼盘

They offer a pleasant respite

它们是被迅猛发展的高楼包围着的

from the high-density development around them.

一片惬意的栖息地。

A break of light and air,

这些小楼房为这高密度的水泥森林提供缕缕阳光和清新空气

an architectural biding of time.

它们在和时间赛跑。

So buried in signage

这些小楼房

are these structures,

就这样被淹没在形形色色的商标之中，

that it often takes a moment

以至于，要把它们的应纳税款和那些

to distinguish the modern

附近的特别设计的大楼房

specially constructed taxpayer

区分开来

from its neighbor:

还得花些时间。

the small commercial building

这是栋上世纪的

from an earlier century,

小型商业建筑。

whose upper floors have been sealed,

他们的上面几层已经被查封了。

and whose groundfloor space

但是一楼

now functions as a taxpayer.

还营业着，并且缴着税

The few surfaces not covered by signs

这仅存的没有被商标遮盖的建筑

are often clad in a distinctive, dark

一般都被包裹在有特色的

green-gray, striated aluminum siding.

阴暗铝灰条纹的铝制外壁板之中。

Take-out sandwich shops,

比如三明治快餐小店，

film processing drop-offs,

卖劣质影碟的小贩，

peep-shows and necktie stores.

卖西洋镜和领带的小买卖。

Now these provisional structures have,

现在这些临时的建筑

in some cases,

在一些地方

remained standing

仍然屹立不倒，

for the better part of a human lifetime.

展现着人们生活另一种美好的时光。

The temporary building

这些暂住“居民”

is a triumph of modern industrial organization,

也是现代工业化中的胜利者。

a healthy sublimation

它们也是对建楼欲望的

of the urge to build,

一种升华。

and proof that not every

还向人们证明了，

architectural idea

不是每一个建筑

need be set in stone.

都是一成不变、无法更改的。

That's the end.

这个故事也讲完了。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

And the next story is called, "On the Human Lap."

下一个故事叫做：《在人类的膝盖上》

For the ancient Egyptians

对于古代埃及人来说

the lap was a platform

膝盖是一个平台，

upon which to place

用来放置

the earthly possessions of the dead --

死去的人生前尘世的财产。

30 cubits from foot to knee.

这个平台的长度就是从脚到膝盖上。

It was not until the 14th century

直到14世纪

that an Italian painter

一位意大利画家第一次

recognized the lap

把这种膝盖上的平台

as a Grecian temple,

视为古希腊人的神庙，

upholstered in flesh and cloth.

只不过这座神庙是用肉体和衣服布置起来的。

Over the next 200 years

在之后的200年里，

we see the infant Christ

我们看到婴儿基督

go from a sitting to a standing position

在圣母的膝盖上，

on the Virgin's lap,

从坐姿变成站姿。

and then back again.

然后又回到坐姿。

Every child recapitulates this ascension,

每一个孩子都是如此，

straddling one or both legs,

跨立在一条或两条腿上

sitting sideways,

或者倾斜地坐着，

or leaning against the body.

又或者倚着上身。

From there, to the modern ventriloquist's dummy,

从这个到现代的口技者的木偶，

is but a brief moment in history.

不是一段简短的历史。

You were late for school again this morning.

今天早上你上学又迟到了。

The ventriloquist must first make us believe

口技者必须首先让我们相信，

that a small boy is sitting on his lap.

在他膝盖上坐着的是一个小男孩儿。

The illusion of speech follows incidentally.

然后自然而然的带出台词。

What have you got to say for yourself, Jimmy?

你为自己有什么想要说的吗，吉米？

As adults we admire the lap

作为成年人，我们羡慕那膝盖

from a nostalgic distance.

因为我们怀旧。

We have fading memories

我们的记忆在慢慢消退，

of that provisional temple,

有关那个短暂的神庙的记忆，

erected each time an adult sat down.

那座在每一个坐下的成年人膝上立起的神庙。

On a crowded bus there was always a lap to sit on.

拥挤的公交车上，总有可以坐上去的膝盖。

It is children and teenage girls

孩子和青春期的少女们

who are most keenly aware

能最敏锐的察觉到

of its architectural beauty.

建筑结构的美。

They understand the structural integrity

他们能明白建筑结构的整体性--

of a deep avuncular lap,

我指的是父辈的膝盖，

as compared to the shaky arrangement

相对于你那神经质的外甥女

of a neurotic niece in high heels.

和她的高跟鞋之间摇摇晃晃的关系来说。

The relationship between the lap and its owner

膝盖和它的拥有者之间的关系

is direct and intimate.

直接而亲密。

I envision a 36-story,

我想象了一幢36层高，

450-unit residential high-rise --

有450个房间的住宅大楼

a reason to consider the mental health

用来检验建筑师的心理健康，

of any architect before granting

在还没有给他

an important commission.

一大笔佣金之前。

The bathrooms and kitchens will,

洗手间和厨房

of course, have no windows.

当然是没有窗户的。

The lap of luxury

膝盖上的奢侈生活

is an architectural construct of childhood,

只是一个童年的构想，

which we seek, in vain,

我们在寻觅的过程中总是无功而返，

as adults, to employ.

就像成年人雇佣人的时候一样。

That's the end.

故事讲完了。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

The next story is called "The Haverpiece Collection"

下一个故事叫做《哈弗皮斯的收藏》。

A nondescript warehouse,

这是一个难以描述的仓库，

visible for a moment

这会儿是你能看见它，

from the northbound lanes of the Prykushko Expressway,

在Prykushko高速公路向北的车道上，

serves as the temporary resting place

被用作一个临时的休息所，

for the Haverpiece collection

为了哈弗皮斯(Haverpiece)的收藏而设

of European dried fruit.

——欧洲水果干。

The profound convolutions

那些樱桃干表面

on the surface of a dried cherry.

深深的卷曲；

The foreboding sheen of an extra-large date.

以及巨大枣子表面给人不祥预感的光泽。

Do you remember wandering as a child

还记得吗，当你还是个孩子的时候，

through those dark wooden

游荡在那些暗暗的

storefront galleries?

木屋美术馆店面？

Where everything was displayed

那里的所有东西都展示在

in poorly labeled roach-proof bins.

有着难看标签的蟑螂罐里

Pears dried in the form

梨子干有着

of genital organs.

生殖器一样的形状。

Apricot halves

杏瓣儿

like the ears of cherubim.

就像智天使的耳朵。

In 1962 the unsold stock

1962年，未出售的存货

was purchased by Maurice Haverpiece,

被莫里斯.哈弗皮斯所购买

a wealthy prune juice bottler,

他是一个富有的瓶装青梅汁制造商，

and consolidated to form the core collection.

这些存货经过整理组成了核心的收藏。

As an art form it lies somewhere between

作为一种艺术形式，这个收藏被放在

still-life painting and plumbing.

静物写生和探测之间。

Upon his death in 1967,

直到他1967年去世，

a quarter of the items were sold off for compote

这些藏品的四分之一已经作为拼盘

to a high-class hotel restaurant.

向高档酒店抛售一空。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

Unsuspecting guests were served

信任酒店的顾客

stewed turn-of-the-century

早饭吃的是

Turkish figs for breakfast.

21世纪的土耳其无花果。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

The rest of the collection remains here,

剩余部分的收藏一直留在了这里，

stored in plain brown paper bags

在筹到足够资金

until funds can be raised

见一个永久性博物馆

to build a permanent museum

和学习中心之前，

and study center.

它们都被存放在普通的棕色纸袋里。

A shoe made of apricot leather

一只为沙皇女儿

for the daughter of a czar.

制作的杏仁皮的鞋子。

That's the end. Thank you.

最后一个故事讲完了。谢谢大家。

(Applause)

（掌声）