My identity is a superpower -- not an obstacle | America Ferrera | TED

Prevodilac: Dragana Savanovic Lektor: Ivana Korom

On the red tiles in my family's den

Na crvenim pločicama u našoj porodičnoj sobici

I would dance and sing to the made-for-TV movie "Gypsy,"

bih plesala i pevala uz televizijski film „Ciganka“

starring Bette Midler.

sa Bet Midler.

(Singing) "I had a dream.

(Peva) „Imala sam san.

A wonderful dream, papa."

Divan san, tata.“

I would sing it with the urgency and the burning desire of a nine-year-old

Pevala bih to sa upornošću i gorućom željom devetogodišnjakinje

who did, in fact, have a dream.

koja jeste, u stvari, imala san.

My dream was to be an actress.

Moj san bio je da postanem glumica.

And it's true that I never saw anyone who looked like me

Istina je da nikada nisam videla nekog ko izgleda kao ja

in television or in films,

na televiziji ili na filmu,

and sure, my family and friends and teachers all constantly warned me

i naravno, moja porodica i prijatelji i nastavnici su me stalno upozoravali

that people like me didn't make it in Hollywood.

da ljudi kao ja ne uspevaju u Holivudu.

But I was an American.

Ali ja sam Amerikanka.

I had been taught to believe that anyone could achieve anything,

Učili su me da verujem da svi mogu da postignu ono što žele,

regardless of the color of their skin,

bez obzira na boju kože,

the fact that my parents immigrated from Honduras,

činjenicu da su moji roditelji imigrirali iz Hondurasa,

the fact that I had no money.

činjenicu da nisam imala novca.

I didn't need my dream to be easy,

Nije trebalo da moj san bude lak,

I just needed it to be possible.

već da bude ostvariv.

And when I was 15,

A kada sam imala 15 godina,

I got my first professional audition.

dobila sam prvu profesionalnu audiciju.

It was a commercial for cable subscriptions

Bila je to reklama za kablovsku pretplatu

or bail bonds, I don't really remember.

ili kauciju, stvarno se ne sećam.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

What I do remember is that the casting director asked me,

Ono čega se sećam jeste da me je direktorka kastinga pitala:

"Could you do that again, but just this time, sound more Latina."

„Možeš li to ponovo da uradiš, samo ovog puta da zvučiš više kao Latina.“

"Um, OK.

„Hm, ok.

So you want me to do it in Spanish?" I asked.

Znači hoćete da ponovim na španskom?“, pitala sam.

"No, no, do it in English, just sound Latina."

„Ne, ne, ponovi na engleskom, samo zvuči kao Latinoamerikanka.“

"Well, I am a Latina, so isn't this what a Latina sounds like?"

„Pa, ja jesam Latinoamerikanka, zar one ne zvuče ovako?“

There was a long and awkward silence,

Nastupila je dugačka i neprijatna tišina,

and then finally,

a onda konačno:

"OK, sweetie, never mind, thank you for coming in, bye!"

„Ok, dušo, nema veze, hvala što si došla, zdravo!“

It took me most of the car ride home to realize that by "sound more Latina"

Skoro celu vožnju kući mi je trebalo da shvatim da je pod „zvuči kao Latina“

she was asking me to speak in broken English.

mislila da treba da govorim na lošem engleskom.

And I couldn't figure out why the fact

Nije mi bilo jasno zašto

that I was an actual, real-life, authentic Latina

to što sam prava, autentična Latinoamerikanka u realnom životu

didn't really seem to matter.

nije bilo toliko važno.

Anyway, I didn't get the job.

U svakom slučaju, nisam dobila posao.

I didn't get a lot of the jobs people were willing to see me for:

Nisam dobila mnogo poslova za koje sam išla na audicije:

the gang-banger's girlfriend,

devojka člana bande,

the sassy shoplifter,

zavodljiva kradljivica,

pregnant chola number two.

trudna čola broj dva.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

These were the kinds of roles that existed for someone like me.

To su bile uloge koje su postojale za nekog kao što sam ja.

Someone they looked at and saw as too brown, too fat,

Nekoga koga su videli kao previše tamnoputu, debelu,

too poor, too unsophisticated.

previše siromašnu ili nesofisticiranu.

These roles were stereotypes

Ove uloge su bile stereotipi

and couldn't have been further from my own reality

i nisu mogle biti dalje od moje realnosti

or from the roles I dreamt of playing.

ili od uloga koje sam sanjala da igram.

I wanted to play people who were complex and multidimensional,

Želela sam da igram ljude koji su kompleksni i multidimenzionalni,

people who existed in the center of their own lives.

koji su postojali u središtu sopstvenih života.

Not cardboard cutouts that stood in the background of someone else's.

A ne kartonske likove koji stoje u pozadini tuđih života.

But when I dared to say that to my manager --

Ali, kada sam se usudila to da kažem svom menadžeru -

that's the person I pay to help me find opportunity --

osobi koju plaćam za pomoć u pronalaženju prilika -

his response was,

njegov odgovor je bio:

"Someone has to tell that girl she has unrealistic expectations."

„Neko mora da kaže toj devojčici da ima nerealna očekivanja.“

And he wasn't wrong.

Nije grešio.

I mean, I fired him, but he wasn't wrong.

Mislim, otpustila sam ga, ali nije grešio.

(Laughter)

(Smeh)

(Applause)

(Aplauz)

Because whenever I did try to get a role that wasn't a poorly written stereotype,

Jer kad god bih pokušala da dobijem ulogu koja nije loše napisan stereotip,

I would hear,

čula bih:

"We're not looking to cast this role diversely."

„Ne želimo da prikažemo raznolikost kroz ovu ulogu.“

Or, "We love her, but she's too specifically ethnic."

Ili: „Sviđa nam se, ali je previše specifično etnička.“

Or, "Unfortunately, we already have one Latino in this movie."

Ili: „Nažalost, već imamo jednu Latinoamerikanca u ovom filmu."

I kept receiving the same message again and again and again.

Uporno sam dobijala istu poruku iznova i iznova.

That my identity was an obstacle I had to overcome.

Da je moj identitet prepreka koju moram da savladam.

And so I thought,

I tako sam mislila:

"Come at me, obstacle.

„Hajde ako smeš, prepreko.

I'm an American. My name is America.

Ja sam Amerikanka. Zovem se Amerika.

I trained my whole life for this, I'll just follow the playbook,

Ceo život sam se obučavala za ovo, samo ću pratiti priručnik,

I'll work harder."

više ću se truditi.“

And so I did, I worked my hardest

I jesam, trudila sam se jako

to overcome all the things that people said were wrong with me.

da prevaziđem sve stvari za koje su ljudi rekli da ne valjaju.

I stayed out of the sun so that my skin wouldn't get too brown,

Klonila sam se sunca kako mi koža ne bi previše potamnela,

I straightened my curls into submission.

pokorno sam ispravljala kovrdže.

I constantly tried to lose weight,

Uporno sam pokušavala da smršam,

I bought fancier and more expensive clothes.

kupila sam moderniju i skuplju garderobu.

All so that when people looked at me,

Sve to da ljudi, kada me pogledaju,

they wouldn't see a too fat, too brown, too poor Latina.

ne vide previše debelu, tamnoputu, previše siromašnu Latinoamerikanku.

They would see what I was capable of.

Već ono za šta sam sposobna.

And maybe they would give me a chance.

Kako bi mi možda pružili šansu.

And in an ironic twist of fate,

Ironičnom igrom slučaja,

when I finally did get a role that would make all my dreams come true,

kada sam konačno dobila ulogu koja bi mi ostvarila sve snove,

it was a role that required me to be exactly who I was.

to je bila uloga koja je zahtevala da budem baš to što jesam.

Ana in "Real Women Have Curves"

Ana u „Prave žene imaju obline“

was a brown, poor, fat Latina.

je bila tamnoputa, siromašna, debela Latinoamerikanka.

I had never seen anyone like her, anyone like me,

Nikada nisam videla nikog kao što je ona, kao što sam ja,

existing in the center of her own life story.

da postoji u centru svoje životne priče.

I traveled throughout the US

Putovala sam kroz SAD

and to multiple countries with this film

i mnogobrojne zemlje sa ovim filmom

where people, regardless of their age, ethnicity, body type,

gde su se ljudi, bez obzira na godine, nacionalnost, tip tela,

saw themselves in Ana.

prepoznali u Ani.

A 17-year-old chubby Mexican American girl

Sedamnaestogodišnjoj bucmastoj meksičko-američkoj devojčici

struggling against cultural norms to fulfill her unlikely dream.

koja se bori protiv kulturnih normi kako bi ostvarila svoj neizvesni san.

In spite of what I had been told my whole life,

Uprkos onome što su mi govorili celog mog života,

I saw firsthand that people actually did want to see stories about people like me.

iz prve ruke sam videla da su ljudi ipak želeli da vide priče o ovakvim ljudima.

And that my unrealistic expectations

I da su moja nerealistična očekivanja

to see myself authentically represented in the culture

da ću biti autentično kulturno predstavljena

were other people’s expectations, too.

bila i očekivanja drugih ljudi.

"Real Women Have Curves"

„Prave žene imaju obline“

was a critical, cultural and financial success.

je postigao kritički, kulturni i finansijski uspeh.

"Great," I thought, "We did it!

„Super,“ pomislila sam, „Uspeli smo!“

We proved our stories have value.

Dokazali smo da naše priče vrede.

Things are going to change now."

Stvari će se sada promeniti.“

But I watched as very little happened.

Ali, malo toga se desilo.

There was no watershed.

Nije bilo prekretnice.

No one in the industry was rushing to tell more stories

Niko u toj industriji nije hitao da ispriča još priča

about the audience that was hungry and willing to pay to see them.

o publici koja je bila gladna i voljna da plati kako bi ih gledala.

Four years later, when I got to play Ugly Betty,

Četiri godine kasnije, kada sam dobila ulogu Ružne Beti,

I saw the same phenomenon play out.

isti fenomen se odigrao.

"Ugly Betty" premiered in the US to 16 million viewers

„Ružna Beti“ je imala premijeru u SAD-u pred 16 miliona gledalaca

and was nominated for 11 Emmys in its first year.

i bila je nominovana za 11 Emija u toku prve godine.

(Applause)

(Aplauz)

But in spite of "Ugly Betty's" success,

Ali, uprkos uspehu „Ružne Beti“,

there would not be another television show

neće biti druge televizijske serije

led by a Latina actress

sa Latinoamerikankom u glavnoj ženskoj ulozi

on American television for eight years.

na američkoj televiziji u narednih osam godina.

It's been 12 years

Prošlo je 12 godina

since I became the first and only Latina

otkako sam postala prva i jedina Latinoamerikanka

to ever win an Emmy in a lead category.

koja je ikada osvojila Emi za glavnu ulogu.

That is not a point of pride.

To nije za ponos.

That is a point of deep frustration.

Već povod za duboku frustraciju.

Not because awards prove our worth,

Ne zato što nagrade pokazuju našu vrednost,

but because who we see thriving in the world

nego zato što oni koji uspevaju u svetu

teaches us how to see ourselves,

uče nas kako da vidimo sami sebe,

how to think about our own value,

kako da razmišljamo o sopstvenoj vrednosti,

how to dream about our futures.

kako da sanjamo o svojoj budućnosti.

And anytime I begin to doubt that,

I kad god počnem da sumnjam u to,

I remember that there was a little girl, living in the Swat Valley of Pakistan.

setim se jedne male devojčice, koja je živela u dolini Svat u Pakistanu.

And somehow, she got her hands on some DVDs

Nekako, dočepala se nekih DVD-ja

of an American television show

američke televizijske serije

in which she saw her own dream of becoming a writer reflected.

u kojoj je videla odraz sopstvenog sna da postane spisateljica.

In her autobiography, Malala wrote,

U svojoj autobiografiji, Malala je napisala:

"I had become interested in journalism

„Zainteresovala sam se za novinarstvo

after seeing how my own words could make a difference

kada sam videla kako moje reči mogu promeniti stvari

and also from watching the "Ugly Betty" DVDs

ali i kada sam gledala „Ružnu Beti“ na DVD-ju

about life at an American magazine."

o životu u američkom magazinu.“

(Applause)

(Aplauz)

For 17 years of my career,

Za 17 godina karijere,

I have witnessed the power our voices have

svedočila sam kako naši glasovi imaju moć

when they can access presence in the culture.

kada su prisutni u kulturi.

I've seen it.

Videla sam to.

I've lived it, we've all seen it.

Doživela sam to, svi smo to videli.

In entertainment, in politics,

U industriji zabave, politici,

in business, in social change.

biznisu, u društvenim promenama.

We cannot deny it -- presence creates possibility.

Ne možemo to da poreknemo - prisustvo stvara mogućnosti.

But for the last 17 years,

Ali, u poslednjih 17 godina,

I've also heard the same excuses

čula sam iste izgovore

for why some of us can access presence in the culture

zašto neki od nas mogu biti prisutni u kulturi

and some of us can't.

a neki od nas ne mogu.

Our stories don't have an audience,

Naše priče nemaju publiku,

our experiences won't resonate in the mainstream,

naša iskustva neće imati odjeka u vodećim tokovima,

our voices are too big a financial risk.

naši glasovi su veliki finansijski rizik.

Just a few years ago, my agent called

Pre samo nekoliko godina, agent me je zvao

to explain to me why I wasn't getting a role in a movie.

da mi objasni zašto nisam dobila ulogu u filmu.

He said, "They loved you

Rekao je: „Svidela si im se

and they really, really do want to cast diversely,

i stvarno, stvarno žele raznolike uloge,

but the movie isn't financeable until they cast the white role first."

ali film se ne finansira sve dok prvo ne izaberu belačku ulogu.“

He delivered the message with a broken heart

Saopštio mi je poruku slomljenog srca

and with a tone that communicated, "I understand how messed up this is."

i tonom koji je je značio: „Razumem koliko je ovo zapetljano.“

But nonetheless, just like hundreds of times before,

Ipak, kao i stotinu puta pre,

I felt the tears roll down my face.

osetila sam suze kako mi se kotrljaju niz lice.

And the pang of rejection rise up in me

I bol odbijanja kako raste u meni,

and then the voice of shame scolding me,

a onda i glas srama kako me grdi:

"You are a grown woman, stop crying over a job."

„Ti si odrasla žena, prestani da plačeš zbog posla.“

I went through this process for years of accepting the failure as my own

Prolazila sam kroz ovaj proces godinama prihvatajući neuspeh kao svoj,

and then feeling deep shame that I couldn't overcome the obstacles.

a onda osećajući veliku sramotu što nisam mogla da prevaziđem prepreke.

But this time, I heard a new voice.

Ali ovog puta, čula sam novi glas.

A voice that said, "I'm tired.

Glas koji je rekao „Umorna sam.

I've had enough."

Dosta mi je.“

A voice that understood

Glas koji je razumeo

my tears and my pain were not about losing a job.

da suze i bol nisu zbog gubitka posla.

They were about what was actually being said about me.

Već zbog onoga šta je to o meni govorilo.

What had been said about me my whole life

Što su o meni celog života govorili

by executives and producers

direktori i producenti

and directors and writers and agents and managers

i režiseri i scenaristi, agenti i menadžeri,

and teachers and friends and family.

nastavnici, prijatelji i porodica.

That I was a person of less value.

Da sam osoba koja manje vredi.

I thought sunscreen and straightening irons

Mislila sam da će krema za sunčanje i aparati za ispravljanje kose

would bring about change in this deeply entrenched value system.

doneti promenu u ovom duboko ukorenjenom sistemu vrednosti.

But what I realized in that moment

Ono što sam shvatila u tom trenutku

was that I was never actually asking the system to change.

je da u stvari nikada nisam tražila da se sistem promeni.

I was asking it to let me in, and those aren't the same thing.

već da me prihvati, a to nisu iste stvari.

I couldn't change what a system believed about me,

Nisam mogla da promenim ono što sistem misli o meni,

while I believed what the system believed about me.

dok sam verovala u to što sistem misli o meni.

And I did.

A jesam.

I, like everyone around me,

Ja sam, kao i svi oko mene,

believed that it wasn't possible for me to exist in my dream as I was.

verovala da nije moguće da postojim u svom snu takva kakva sam.

And I went about trying to make myself invisible.

I nastavila sam sa pokušajima da učinim sebe nevidljivom.

What this revealed to me was that it is possible

Ono što sam shvatila iz ovoga je da je moguće

to be the person who genuinely wants to see change

biti osoba koja iskreno želi da vidi promenu

while also being the person whose actions keep things the way they are.

i u isto vreme osoba čija dela održavaju stvari kakve jesu.

And what it's led me to believe is that change isn't going to come

To me je dovelo do toga da verujem da promena neće doći

by identifying the good guys and the bad guys.

ako otkrijemo dobre i loše ljude.

That conversation lets us all off the hook.

Taj razgovor nas sve oslobađa krivice.

Because most of us are neither one of those.

Jer većina nas nije ni jedno od toga.

Change will come

Promena će doći

when each of us has the courage

kada svako od nas bude imao hrabrosti

to question our own fundamental values and beliefs.

da preispita sopstvene osnovne vrednosti i verovanja.

And then see to it that our actions lead to our best intentions.

I onda se pobrine da naša dela vode ka našim najboljim namerama.

I am just one of millions of people

Ja sam samo jedna od milion ljudi

who have been told that in order to fulfill my dreams,

kojima su rekli da ako želi da ispuni svoje snove,

in order to contribute my talents to the world

da doprinese svetu svojim talentima

I have to resist the truth of who I am.

mora da se odupre istini o tome ko je.

I for one, am ready to stop resisting

Prvo, spremna sam da prestanem da se opirem

and to start existing as my full and authentic self.

i da počnem da postojim kao potpuno autentična i svoja.

If I could go back and say anything

Kada bih mogla da vratim vreme i kažem bilo šta

to that nine-year-old, dancing in the den, dreaming her dreams,

toj devetogodišnjoj devojčici, koja pleše, sanja svoje snove,

I would say,

rekla bih:

my identity is not my obstacle.

moj identitet nije moja prepreka.

My identity is my superpower.

Moj identitet je moja supermoć.

Because the truth is,

Jer istina je

I am what the world looks like.

da sam ja ono što je svet.

You are what the world looks like.

Vi ste ono što je svet.

Collectively, we are what the world actually looks like.

Svi zajedno, mi smo ono što je svet zapravo.

And in order for our systems to reflect that,

A kako bi se to ogledalo u našem sistemu,

they don't have to create a new reality.

ne moraju stvoriti novu realnost.

They just have to stop resisting the one we already live in.

Već samo treba da prestanu da poriču ovu u kojoj već živimo.

Thank you.

Hvala vam.

(Applause)

(Aplauz)