Anne-Marie Slaughter: Can we all "have it all"?

180,502 views ใƒป 2014-03-12

TED


ืื ื ืœื—ืฅ ืคืขืžื™ื™ื ืขืœ ื”ื›ืชื•ื‘ื™ื•ืช ื‘ืื ื’ืœื™ืช ืœืžื˜ื” ื›ื“ื™ ืœื”ืคืขื™ืœ ืืช ื”ืกืจื˜ื•ืŸ.

ืžืชืจื’ื: Helaina cern ืžื‘ืงืจ: Zeeva Livshitz
00:12
So my moment of truth
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ืื– ืจื’ืข ื”ืืžืช ืฉืœื™
00:14
did not come all at once.
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ืœื ื”ื’ื™ืข ื‘ื‘ืช ืื—ืช.
00:17
In 2010, I had the chance to be considered
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ื‘-2010, ื”ื™ืชื” ืœื™ ื”ื”ื–ื“ืžื ื•ืช ืœื”ื™ื•ืช ืžื•ืขืžื“ืช
00:21
for promotion from my job
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ืœืงื™ื“ื•ื ืžื”ืชืคืงื™ื“ ืฉืœื™
00:23
as director of policy planning
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ื›ืžื ื”ืœืช ืชื™ื›ื ื•ืŸ ื”ืžื“ื™ื ื™ื•ืช
00:25
at the U.S. State Department.
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ื‘ืžื—ืœืงืช ื”ืžื“ื™ื ื” ืฉืœ ืืจื”"ื‘.
00:28
This was my moment to lean in,
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ื–ื” ื”ื™ื” ื”ืจื’ืข ืฉืœื™ ืœื”ืชื‘ืœื˜,
00:32
to push myself forward
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ืœื“ื—ื•ืฃ ืืช ืขืฆืžื™ ืงื“ื™ืžื”
00:35
for what are really only a handful
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ื‘ืฉื‘ื™ืœ ืžื” ืฉื”ื•ื ืื—ื“ ืžื”ื™ื—ื™ื“ื™ื
00:38
of the very top foreign policy jobs,
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ื‘ื™ืŸ ื”ื’'ื•ื‘ื™ื ื”ื‘ื›ื™ืจื™ื ื‘ืžื“ื™ื ื™ื•ืช ื”ื—ื•ืฅ
00:41
and I had just finished a big, 18-month project
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ื•ืื ื™ ืจืง ื”ืจื’ืข ืกื™ื™ืžืชื™ ืคืจื•ื™ื™ืงื˜ ื’ื“ื•ืœ ืฉืœ 18 ื—ื•ื“ืฉื™ื
00:44
for Secretary Clinton, successfully,
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ื‘ืฉื‘ื™ืœ ืžื–ื›ื™ืจืช ื”ืžื“ื™ื ื” ื’ื‘' ืงืœื™ื ื˜ื•ืŸ, ื‘ื”ืฆืœื—ื”,
00:46
and I knew I could handle a bigger job.
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ื•ื™ื“ืขืชื™ ืฉืื ื™ ื™ื›ื•ืœื” ืœื”ืชืžื•ื“ื“ ืขื ื’'ื•ื‘ ื’ื“ื•ืœ ื™ื•ืชืจ.
00:50
The woman I thought I was
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ื”ืื™ืฉื” ืฉื—ืฉื‘ืชื™ ืฉื”ื™ื™ืชื™
00:54
would have said yes.
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ื”ื™ื™ืชื” ืื•ืžืจืช ื›ืŸ.
00:56
But I had been commuting for two years
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ืื‘ืœ ืื ื™ ืื ื™ ื ืกืขืชื™ ืœืขื‘ื•ื“ื” ื‘ืžืฉืš ืฉื ืชื™ื™ื
00:58
between Washington and Princeton, New Jersey,
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ื‘ื™ืŸ ื•ื•ืฉื™ื ื’ื˜ื•ืŸ ื•ืคืจื™ื ืกื˜ื•ืŸ ื ื™ื• ื’'ืจืกื™
01:02
where my husband and my two teenage sons lived,
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ื”ื™ื›ืŸ ืฉื‘ืขืœื™ ื•ืฉื ื™ ื‘ื ื™ ื‘ื ื™ ื”ืขืฉืจื” ื’ืจื•,
01:06
and it was not going well.
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ื•ื–ื” ืœื ื”ืœืš ื›ืœ ื›ืš ื˜ื•ื‘.
01:09
I tried on the idea of eking out another two years
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ื ื™ืกื™ืชื™ ืืช ื”ืจืขื™ื•ืŸ ืฉืœ ืœืกื—ื•ื˜ ืขื•ื“ ืฉื ืชื™ื™ื
01:12
in Washington, or maybe uprooting my sons
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ื‘ื•ื•ืฉื™ื ื’ื˜ื•ืŸ, ืื• ืื•ืœื™ ืœืขืงื•ืจ ืืช ื‘ื ื™ื™
01:15
from their school and my husband from his work
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ืžื‘ื™ืช ื”ืกืคืจ ืฉืœื”ื ื•ืืช ื‘ืขืœื™ ืžืขื‘ื•ื“ืชื•
01:17
and asking them to join me.
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ื•ืœื‘ืงืฉ ืžื”ื ืœื”ืฆื˜ืจืฃ ืืœื™.
01:20
But deep down, I knew
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ืื‘ืœ ื‘ืชื•ืš ืชื•ื›ื™, ื™ื“ืขืชื™
01:23
that the right decision was to go home,
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ืฉื”ื”ื—ืœื˜ื” ื”ื ื›ื•ื ื” ื”ื™ืชื” ืœืœื›ืช ื”ื‘ื™ืชื”,
01:27
even if I didn't fully recognize the woman
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ืืคื™ืœื• ืื ืœื ืœื’ืžืจื™ ื–ื™ื”ื™ืชื™ ืืช ื”ืืฉื”
01:29
who was making that choice.
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ืฉืขืฉืชื” ืืช ื”ื‘ื—ื™ืจื” ื”ื–ืืช.
01:33
That was a decision based on love
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ื–ื• ื”ื™ื™ืชื” ื”ื—ืœื˜ื” ืžื‘ื•ืกืกืช ืขืœ ืื”ื‘ื”
01:37
and responsibility.
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ื•ืื—ืจื™ื•ืช.
01:39
I couldn't keep watching my oldest son
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ืœื ื™ื›ื•ืœืชื™ ืœื”ืžืฉื™ืš ืœืฆืคื•ืช ื‘ื‘ื ื™ ื”ื‘ื›ื•ืจ
01:42
make bad choices
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ืžืงื‘ืœ ื”ื—ืœื˜ื•ืช ื’ืจื•ืขื•ืช
01:43
without being able to be there for him
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ื‘ืœื™ ื”ื™ื›ื•ืœืช ืœื”ื™ื•ืช ืฉื ื‘ืฉื‘ื™ืœื•
01:46
when and if he needed me.
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ืžืชื™ ื•ืื ื”ื•ื ื”ื™ื” ืฆืจื™ืš ืื•ืชื™.
01:50
But the real change came more gradually.
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ืื‘ืœ ื”ืฉื™ื ื•ื™ ื”ืืžื™ืชื™ ื‘ื ื™ื•ืชืจ ื‘ื”ื“ืจื’ื”.
01:53
Over the next year,
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ื‘ืžืฉืš ื”ืฉื ื” ื”ื‘ืื”,
01:55
while my family was righting itself,
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ื‘ื–ืžืŸ ืฉืžืฉืคื—ืชื™ ืฉื™ืงืžื” ืืช ืขืฆืžื”,
01:58
I started to realize
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ื”ืชื—ืœืชื™ ืœื”ื‘ื™ืŸ
02:00
that even if I could go back into government,
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ืฉืืคื™ืœื• ืื ื”ื™ื™ืชื™ ื™ื›ื•ืœื” ืœื—ื–ื•ืจ ืœืžืžืฉืœื”,
02:02
I didn't want to.
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ืœื ืจืฆื™ืชื™ ื‘ื–ื”.
02:04
I didn't want to miss the last five years
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ืœื ืจืฆื™ืชื™ ืœื”ื—ืžื™ืฅ ืืช ื—ืžืฉ ื”ืฉื ื™ื ื”ืื—ืจื•ื ื•ืช
02:08
that my sons were at home.
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ืฉื‘ื ื™ื™ ื”ื™ื• ื‘ื‘ื™ืช.
02:11
I finally allowed myself to accept
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ืื ื™ ืœื‘ืกื•ืฃ ื”ืจืฉืชื™ ืœืขืฆืžื™ ืœืงื‘ืœ
02:15
what was really most important to me,
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ืžื” ืฉื‘ืืžืช ื”ื™ื” ื”ื—ืฉื•ื‘ ื‘ื™ื•ืชืจ ื‘ืฉื‘ื™ืœื™,
02:18
not what I was conditioned to want
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ืœื ืžื” ืฉื”ืชื ื• ืื•ืชื™ ืœืจืฆื•ืช
02:21
or maybe what I conditioned myself to want,
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ืื• ืื•ืœื™ ืžื” ืฉื”ืชื ืชื™ ืืช ืขืฆืžื™ ืœืจืฆื•ืช,
02:26
and that decision led to a reassessment
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ื•ื”ื—ืœื˜ื” ื–ื• ื”ื•ื‘ื™ืœื” ืœื”ืขืจื›ื” ืžื—ื“ืฉ
02:31
of the feminist narrative that I grew up with
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ืฉืœ ื”ื ืจืื˜ื™ื‘ ื”ืคืžื™ื ื™ืกื˜ื™ ืฉืื™ืชื• ื’ื“ืœืชื™
02:34
and have always championed.
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ื•ืฉืชืžื™ื“ ื“ื’ืœืชื™ ื‘ื•.
02:38
I am still completely committed
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ืื ื™ ืขื“ื™ื™ืŸ ืžื—ื•ื™ื™ื‘ืช ืœื—ืœื•ื˜ื™ืŸ
02:42
to the cause of male-female equality,
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ืœืขื™ืงืจื•ืŸ ืฉืœ ืฉื•ื•ื™ืŸ ื‘ื™ืŸ ื’ื‘ืจ-ืื™ืฉื”,
02:47
but let's think about what that equality really means,
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ืื‘ืœ ื‘ื•ืื• ื ื—ืฉื•ื‘ ืขืœ ืžื” ืฉืฉื•ื•ื™ื•ืŸ ื‘ืืžืช ืื•ืžืจ,
02:52
and how best to achieve it.
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ื•ืื™ืš ืœื”ืฉื™ื’ ืื•ืชื• ื‘ืฆื•ืจื” ื”ื˜ื•ื‘ื” ื‘ื™ื•ืชืจ.
02:55
I always accepted the idea
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ืชืžื™ื“ ืงื‘ืœืชื™ ืืช ื”ืจืขื™ื•ืŸ
02:58
that the most respected and powerful people
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ืฉื”ืื ืฉื™ื ื”ื›ื™ ืžื›ื•ื‘ื“ื™ื ื•ื‘ืขืœื™ ื›ื—
03:01
in our society are men at the top of their careers,
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ื‘ื—ื‘ืจื” ืฉืœื ื• ื”ื™ื ื ื’ื‘ืจื™ื ื‘ืฉื™ื ื”ืงืจื™ื™ืจื” ืฉืœื”ื,
03:05
so that the measure of male-female equality
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ืื– ื”ืžื“ื“ ืฉืœ ืฉื•ื•ื™ื•ืŸ ื’ื‘ืจ-ืื™ืฉื”
03:09
ought to be how many women are in those positions:
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ืžื•ื›ืจื— ืœื”ื™ื•ืช ื›ืžื” ื ืฉื™ื ื ืžืฆืื•ืช ื‘ืขืžื“ื•ืช ื”ืืœื”:
03:14
prime ministers, presidents, CEOs,
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ืจืืฉืช ืžืžืฉืœื”, ื ืฉื™ืื•ืช, ืžื ื›"ืœื•ืช,
03:17
directors, managers, Nobel laureates, leaders.
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ื“ื™ืจืงื˜ื•ืจื™ื•ืช, ืžื ื”ืœื•ืช, ื–ื•ื›ื•ืช ืคืจืก ื ื•ื‘ืœ, ืžื ื”ื™ื’ื•ืช.
03:22
I still think we should do everything we possibly can
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ืื ื™ ืขื“ื™ื™ืŸ ื—ื•ืฉื‘ืช ืฉืื ื• ืฆืจื™ื›ื™ื ืœืขืฉื•ืช ื›ื›ืœ ื™ื›ื•ืœืชื ื•
03:26
to achieve that goal.
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ื›ื“ื™ ืœื”ื’ื™ืข ืœืžื˜ืจื” ื”ื–ื•.
03:28
But that's only half of real equality,
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ืื‘ืœ ื–ื” ืจืง ื—ืฆื™ ืžืฉื•ื•ื™ื•ืŸ ืืžื™ืชื™,
03:33
and I now think we're never going to get there
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ื•ืขื›ืฉื™ื• ืื ื™ ื—ื•ืฉื‘ืช ืฉืœืขื•ืœื ืœื ื ื’ื™ืข ืœืฉื
03:36
unless we recognize the other half.
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ืืœื ืื ื ื›ื™ืจ ื‘ื—ืฆื™ ื”ืฉื ื™.
03:42
I suggest that real equality,
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ืื ื™ ืžืฆื™ืขื” ืฉืฉื•ื•ื™ื•ืŸ ืืžื™ืชื™,
03:46
full equality,
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ืฉื•ื•ื™ื•ืŸ ืžืœื,
03:48
does not just mean valuing women
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ืื™ื ื• ืื•ืžืจ ืจืง ืœื”ืขืจื™ืš ื ืฉื™ื
03:52
on male terms.
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ื‘ืžื•ื ื—ื™ื ื’ื‘ืจื™ื™ื.
03:54
It means creating a much wider range
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ื–ื” ืื•ืžืจ ืœื™ืฆื•ืจ ื˜ื•ื•ื— ืจื—ื‘ ื”ืจื‘ื” ื™ื•ืชืจ
03:58
of equally respected choices
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ืฉืœ ื‘ื—ื™ืจื•ืช ืžื›ื•ื‘ื“ื•ืช ื‘ืฆื•ืจื” ืฉื•ื•ื”
04:02
for women and for men.
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ื‘ืฉื‘ื™ืœ ื ืฉื™ื ื•ื’ื‘ืจื™ื.
04:05
And to get there, we have to change our workplaces,
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ื•ื‘ืฉื‘ื™ืœ ืœื”ื’ื™ืข ืœืฉื, ืขืœื™ื ื• ืœืฉื ื•ืช ืืช ืžืงื•ืžื•ืช ื”ืขื‘ื•ื“ื” ืฉืœื ื•,
04:09
our policies and our culture.
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ืืช ื”ืžื“ื™ื ื™ื•ืช ืฉืœื ื• ื•ืืช ื”ืชืจื‘ื•ืช ืฉืœื ื•.
04:12
In the workplace,
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ื‘ืžืงื•ื ื”ืขื‘ื•ื“ื”,
04:14
real equality means valuing family
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ืฉื•ื•ื™ื•ืŸ ืืžื™ืชื™ ืื•ืžืจ ืœื”ืขืจื™ืš ืžืฉืคื—ื”
04:17
just as much as work,
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ื‘ื“ื™ื•ืง ื›ืžื• ืขื‘ื•ื“ื”,
04:19
and understanding that the two reinforce each other.
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ื•ืœื”ื‘ื™ืŸ ืฉื”ืฉื ื™ื™ื™ื ืžื—ื–ืงื™ื ืื—ื“ ืืช ื”ืฉื ื™.
04:23
As a leader and as a manager,
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ื›ืžื ื”ื™ื’ื” ื•ื›ืžื ื”ืœืช,
04:25
I have always acted on the mantra,
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ืชืžื™ื“ ืคืขืœืชื™ ืœืคื™ ื”ืžื ื˜ืจื”,
04:28
if family comes first,
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ืฉืื ื”ืžืฉืคื—ื” ื‘ืื” ืงื•ื“ื,
04:31
work does not come second --
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ื”ืขื‘ื•ื“ื” ืœื ื‘ืื” ื”ืžืงื•ื ื”ืฉื ื™ --
04:33
life comes together.
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ื”ื—ื™ื™ื ื‘ืื™ื ื‘ื™ื—ื“.
04:36
If you work for me, and you have a family issue,
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ืื ืืชื” ืขื•ื‘ื“ ื‘ืฉื‘ื™ืœื™, ื•ื™ืฉ ืœืš ืขื ื™ื™ื ื™ ืžืฉืคื—ื”,
04:40
I expect you to attend to it,
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ืื ื™ ืžืฆืคื” ืฉืชื˜ืคืœ ื‘ื”ื,
04:42
and I am confident,
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ื•ืื ื™ ื‘ื˜ื•ื—ื”,
04:44
and my confidence has always been borne out,
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ื•ื”ื‘ื˜ื—ื•ืŸ ืฉืœื™ ืชืžื™ื“ ื–ื›ื” ืœืื™ืฉื•ืจ,
04:47
that the work will get done, and done better.
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ืฉื”ืขื‘ื•ื“ื” ืชื™ืขืฉื”, ื•ืืคื™ืœื• ื˜ื•ื‘ ื™ื•ืชืจ.
04:51
Workers who have a reason to get home
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ืขื•ื‘ื“ื™ื ืฉื™ืฉ ืœื”ื ืกื™ื‘ื” ืœืœื›ืช ื”ื‘ื™ืชื”
04:53
to care for their children or their family members
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ื‘ื›ื“ื™ ืœื˜ืคืœ ื‘ื™ืœื“ื™ื ืื• ื‘ื‘ื ื™ ืžืฉืคื—ืชื
04:56
are more focused, more efficient,
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ื”ื ื™ื•ืชืจ ืžืžื•ืงื“ื™ื, ื™ื•ืชืจ ื™ืขื™ืœื™ื,
04:59
more results-focused.
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ื™ื•ืชืจ ืžื›ื•ื•ื ื™ ืชื•ืฆืื”.
05:01
And breadwinners who are also caregivers
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ื•ืœืžืคืจื ืกื™ื ืขื™ืงืจื™ื™ื ืฉื”ื ื’ื ื”ืžื˜ืคืœื™ื
05:04
have a much wider range
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ื™ืฉ ื˜ื•ื•ื— ืจื—ื‘ ื™ื•ืชืจ
05:07
of experiences and contacts.
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ืฉืœ ื ืกื™ื•ืŸ ื•ืฉืœ ืงืฉืจื™ื.
05:09
Think about a lawyer who spends part of his time
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ื—ืฉื‘ื• ืขืœ ืขื•ืจืš ื“ื™ืŸ ืฉืžื‘ืœื” ื—ืœืง ืžื–ืžื ื•
05:12
at school events for his kids
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ื‘ืื™ืจื•ืขื™ื ื‘ื‘ื™ืช ื”ืกืคืจ ื‘ืฉื‘ื™ืœ ื™ืœื“ื™ื•
05:15
talking to other parents.
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ืžื“ื‘ืจ ืขื ื”ื•ืจื™ื ืื—ืจื™ื.
05:17
He's much more likely to bring in
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ื™ืฉ ืœื• ืกื™ื›ื•ื™ ื’ื‘ื•ื” ื™ื•ืชืจ ืœื”ื‘ื™ื
05:19
new clients for his firm
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ืœืงื•ื—ื•ืช ื—ื“ืฉื™ื ืœืžืฉืจื“
05:21
than a lawyer who never leaves his office.
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ืžืืฉืจ ืขื•ืจืš ื“ื™ืŸ ืฉืœืขื•ืœื ืœื ืขื•ื–ื‘ ืืช ืžืฉืจื“ื•.
05:24
And caregiving itself
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ื•ื˜ื™ืคื•ืœ ื‘ืคื ื™ ืขืฆืžื•
05:26
develops patience --
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ืžืคืชื— ืกื‘ืœื ื•ืช --
05:30
a lot of patience --
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ื”ืจื‘ื” ืกื‘ืœื ื•ืช --
05:32
and empathy, creativity, resilience, adaptability.
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ื•ืืžืคืชื™ื”, ื™ืฆื™ืจืชื™ื•ืช, ื—ื•ืกืŸ, ื’ืžื™ืฉื•ืช.
05:38
Those are all attributes that are ever more important
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ืืœื• ื”ืŸ ืชื›ื•ื ื•ืช ืฉื”ืŸ ืืคื™ืœื• ื™ื•ืชืจ ื—ืฉื•ื‘ื•ืช
05:42
in a high-speed, horizontal,
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ื‘ืกื‘ื™ื‘ื” ื”ืžื”ื™ืจื”, ื”ืื•ืคืงื™ืช,
05:44
networked global economy.
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ื•ื”ืžืจื•ืฉืชืช ืฉืœ ื”ื›ืœื›ืœื” ื”ื’ืœื•ื‘ืœื™ืช.
05:48
The best companies actually know this.
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ื”ื—ื‘ืจื•ืช ื”ื˜ื•ื‘ื•ืช ื‘ื™ื•ืชืจ ื™ื•ื“ืขื•ืช ื–ืืช.
05:51
The companies that win awards
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ื”ื—ื‘ืจื•ืช ืฉื–ื•ื›ื•ืช ื‘ืคืจืกื™ื
05:53
for workplace flexibility in the United States
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ืขืœ ื’ืžื™ืฉื•ืช ื‘ืžืงื•ื ื”ืขื‘ื•ื“ื” ื‘ืืจื”"ื‘
05:56
include some of our most successful corporations,
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ื›ื•ืœืœื•ืช ื›ืžื” ืžื”ื—ื‘ืจื•ืช ื”ืžืฆืœื™ื—ื•ืช ื‘ื™ื•ืชืจ ืฉืœื ื•,
06:00
and a 2008 national study
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ื•ืžื—ืงืจ ืœืื•ืžื™ ื‘-2008
06:02
on the changing workforce
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ืขืœ ื”ืฉื™ื ื•ื™ื™ื ื‘ื›ื— ื”ืขื‘ื•ื“ื”
06:04
showed that employees
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ื”ืจืื” ืฉืขื•ื‘ื“ื™ื
06:06
in flexible and effective workplaces
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ื‘ืžืงื•ืžื•ืช ืขื‘ื•ื“ื” ื’ืžื™ืฉื™ื ื•ืืคืงื˜ื™ื‘ื™ื
06:09
are more engaged with their work,
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ืžืขื•ืจื‘ื™ื ื™ื•ืชืจ ื‘ืขื‘ื•ื“ืชื,
06:11
they're more satisfied and more loyal,
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ื”ื ืžืจื•ืฆื™ื ื™ื•ืชืจ ื•ื ืืžื ื™ื ื™ื•ืชืจ,
06:13
they have lower levels of stress
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ื™ืฉ ืœื”ื ืจืžื•ืช ื ืžื•ื›ื•ืช ื™ื•ืชืจ ืฉืœ ืžืชื—
06:15
and higher levels of mental health.
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ื•ืจืžื•ืช ื’ื‘ื•ื”ื•ืช ื™ื•ืชืจ ืฉืœ ื‘ืจื™ืื•ืช ื ืคืฉื™ืช.
06:18
And a 2012 study of employers
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ื•ืžื—ืงืจ ืž-2012 ืฉืœ ืžืขืกื™ืงื™ื
06:21
showed that deep, flexible practices
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ื”ืจืื” ื›ื™ ืฆื•ืจื•ืช ื”ืชื ื”ื’ื•ืช ืขืžื•ืงื•ืช, ื’ืžื™ืฉื•ืช
06:24
actually lowered operating costs
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ื”ื•ืจื™ื“ื• ื‘ืคื•ืขืœ ืืช ืขืœื•ื™ื•ืช ื”ืชืคืขื•ืœ
06:26
and increased adaptability
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ื•ื”ื’ื“ื™ืœื• ืืช ื”ื”ืกืชื’ืœื•ืช
06:29
in a global service economy.
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ื‘ื—ื‘ืจืช ืฉื™ืจื•ืชื™ื ื’ืœื•ื‘ืœื™ืช.
06:32
So you may think
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ืื– ืืชื ื™ื›ื•ืœื™ื ืœื—ืฉื•ื‘
06:35
that the privileging of work over family
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ืฉื”ืขื“ื™ืคื•ืช ืฉืœ ืขื‘ื•ื“ื” ืžืขืœ ืžืฉืคื—ื”
06:39
is only an American problem.
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ื”ื™ื ื‘ืขื™ื” ืืžืจื™ืงืื™ืช ื‘ืœื‘ื“.
06:43
Sadly, though, the obsession with work
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ืœืžืจื‘ื” ื”ืฆืขืจ, ื”ืื•ื‘ืกืกื™ื” ืขื ืขื‘ื•ื“ื”
06:47
is no longer a uniquely American disease.
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ื”ื™ื ื›ื‘ืจ ืื™ื ื” ืžื—ืœื” ืืžืจื™ืงืื™ืช ื™ื™ื—ื•ื“ื™ืช.
06:50
Twenty years ago,
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ืœืคื ื™ ืขืฉืจื™ื ืฉื ื”,
06:52
when my family first started going to Italy,
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ื›ืฉืžืฉืคื—ืชื™ ื”ืชื—ื™ืœื” ืœืจืืฉื•ื ื” ืœื ืกื•ืข ืœืื™ื˜ืœื™ื”
06:54
we used to luxuriate in the culture of siesta.
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ื”ืชืจื’ืœื ื• ืœืœื•ืงืกื•ืก ืฉืœ ืชืจื‘ื•ืช ื”ืกื™ืืกื˜ื”.
06:57
Siesta is not just about avoiding the heat of the day.
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ืกื™ืืกื˜ื” ืื™ื ื” ืจืง ื‘ื›ื“ื™ ืœื”ื™ืžื ืข ืžื—ื•ื ื”ื™ื•ื.
07:00
It's actually just as much
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ื”ื™ื ื‘ืืžืช ื‘ืื•ืชื” ืžื™ื“ื”
07:02
about embracing the warmth of a family lunch.
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ืขืœ ืœื”ืกืชื•ืคืฃ ื‘ื—ื•ืžื” ืฉืœ ืืจื•ื—ื” ืžืฉืคื—ืชื™ืช.
07:05
Now, when we go, fewer and fewer businesses
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ืขื›ืฉื™ื•, ื›ืฉืื ื• ื ื•ืกืขื™ื, ืคื—ื•ืช ื•ืคื—ื•ืช ืขืกืงื™ื
07:08
close for siesta,
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ืกื•ื’ืจื™ื ื‘ืฉื‘ื™ืœ ื”ืกื™ืืกื˜ื”,
07:10
reflecting the advance of global corporations
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ื•ืžืจืื™ื ืืช ื”ื”ืชืงื“ืžื•ืช ืฉืœ ื”ื—ื‘ืจื•ืช ื”ื’ืœื•ื‘ืœื™ื•ืช
07:14
and 24-hour competition.
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ื•ื”ืชื—ืจื•ืช ืฉืœ 24 ืฉืขื•ืช ื‘ื™ืžืžื”.
07:17
So making a place for those we love
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ืื– ืœื™ืฆื•ืจ ืžืงื•ื ื‘ืฉื‘ื™ืœ ืืœื” ืฉืื ื• ืื•ื”ื‘ื™ื
07:19
is actually a global imperative.
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ื”ื•ื ืฆื™ื•ื•ื™ ื’ืœื•ื‘ืœื™
07:23
In policy terms,
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ื‘ืžื•ื ื—ื™ ืžื“ื™ื ื™ื•ืช,
07:26
real equality means recognizing
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ืฉื•ื•ื™ื•ืŸ ืืžื™ืชื™ ืื•ืžืจ ื”ื›ืจื”
07:29
that the work that women have traditionally done
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ืฉืขื‘ื•ื“ื” ืฉื‘ื•ืฆืขื” ืขืœ ื™ื“ื™ ื ืฉื™ื ื‘ืื•ืคืŸ ืžืกื•ืจืชื™
07:32
is just as important
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ื”ื™ื ื” ื—ืฉื•ื‘ื” ื‘ืื•ืชื” ืžื™ื“ื”
07:34
as the work that men have traditionally done,
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ื›ืžื• ื”ืขื‘ื•ื“ื” ืฉื’ื‘ืจื™ื ืขืฉื• ื‘ืื•ืคืŸ ืžืกื•ืจืชื™
07:37
no matter who does it.
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ืœืœื ืชืœื•ืช ื‘ืžื™ ืขื•ืฉื” ืื•ืชื”.
07:40
Think about it: Breadwinning and caregiving
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ื—ืฉื‘ื• ืขืœ ื›ืš: ืžืคืจื ืกื™ื ืจืืฉื™ื™ื ื•ืžื˜ืคืœื™ื
07:44
are equally necessary for human survival.
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ื—ืฉื•ื‘ื™ื ื‘ืื•ืชื” ืžื™ื“ื” ืœืฉืจื™ื“ืช ื‘ื ื™ ื”ืื“ื.
07:47
At least if we get beyond a barter economy,
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ืœืคื—ื•ืช ืื ืื ื• ืžืชืงื“ืžื™ื ืžืขื‘ืจ ืœื›ืœื›ืœืช ื—ืœื™ืคื™ืŸ,
07:51
somebody has to earn an income
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ืžื™ืฉื”ื• ืฆืจื™ืš ืœื”ื‘ื™ื ื”ื›ื ืกื”
07:53
and someone else has to convert that income
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ื•ืžื™ืฉื”ื• ืื—ืจ ืฆืจื™ืš ืœื”ืžื™ืจ ืืช ื”ื”ื›ื ืกื”
07:56
to care and sustenance for loved ones.
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ืœื˜ื™ืคื•ืœ ื•ืชื–ื•ื ื” ื‘ืกื™ืกื™ืช ืœืื”ื•ื‘ื™ื ื•.
08:00
Now most of you, when you hear me
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ืขื›ืฉื™ื•, ืจื•ื‘ื›ื, ื›ืืฉืจ ืืชื ืฉื•ืžืขื™ื ืื•ืชื™
08:02
talk about breadwinning and caregiving,
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ืžื“ื‘ืจืช ืขืœ ืžืคืจื ืกื™ื ืขื™ืงืจื™ื™ื ื•ืขืœ ืžื˜ืคืœื™ื,
08:04
instinctively translate those categories
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ืืชื ืžืชืจื’ืžื™ื ื‘ืื•ืคืŸ ืื™ื ืกื˜ืงื˜ื™ื‘ื™ ืืช ื”ืงื˜ื’ื•ืจื™ื•ืช ื”ืœืœื•
08:08
into men's work and women's work.
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ืœืขื‘ื•ื“ืช ื’ื‘ืจื™ื ื•ืœืขื‘ื•ื“ืช ื ืฉื™ื.
08:12
And we don't typically challenge
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ื•ืื ื• ื‘ืื•ืคืŸ ืจื’ื™ืœ ืœื ืžืืชื’ืจื™ื
08:14
why men's work is advantaged.
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ืžื“ื•ืข ืขื‘ื•ื“ืช ื’ื‘ืจื™ื ืžื•ืขื“ืคืช.
08:18
But consider a same-sex couple
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ืื‘ืœ ืงื—ื• ื‘ื—ืฉื‘ื•ืŸ ื–ื•ื’ื•ืช ื—ื“ ืžื™ื ื™ื™ื
08:21
like my friends Sarah and Emily.
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ื›ืžื• ื—ื‘ืจื•ืชื™ ืฉืจื” ื•ืืžื™ืœื™.
08:23
They're psychiatrists.
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ื”ืŸ ืคืกื™ื›ื™ืื˜ืจื™ื•ืช.
08:25
They got married five years ago,
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ื”ืŸ ื”ืชื—ืชื ื• ืœืคื ื™ ื—ืžืฉ ืฉื ื™ื,
08:27
and now they have two-year-old twins.
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ื•ืขื›ืฉื™ื• ื™ืฉ ืœื”ืŸ ืชืื•ืžื™ื ื‘ื ื™ ืฉื ืชื™ื™ื.
08:30
They love being mothers,
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ื”ืŸ ืื•ื”ื‘ื•ืช ืœื”ื™ื•ืช ืืžื”ื•ืช,
08:32
but they also love their work,
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ืื‘ืœ ื”ืŸ ื’ื ืื•ื”ื‘ื•ืช ืœืขื‘ื•ื“
08:34
and they're really good at what they do.
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ื•ื”ืŸ ืžืžืฉ ื˜ื•ื‘ื•ืช ื‘ืžื” ืฉื”ืŸ ืขื•ืฉื•ืช.
08:36
So how are they going to divide up
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ืื– ื›ื™ืฆื“ ื”ืŸ ื”ื•ืœื›ื•ืช ืœื—ืœืง
08:38
breadwinning and caregiving responsibilities?
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ืืช ืชื—ื•ืžื™ ื”ืื—ืจื™ื•ืช ืฉืœ ืคืจื ืกื” ื•ื˜ื™ืคื•ืœ?
08:40
Should one of them stop working
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ื”ืื ืื—ืช ืžื”ืŸ ืฆืจื™ื›ื” ืœื”ืคืกื™ืง ืœืขื‘ื•ื“
08:42
or reduce hours to be home?
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ืื• ืœื”ื•ืจื™ื“ ืฉืขื•ืช ื‘ื›ื“ื™ ืœื”ื™ื•ืช ื‘ื‘ื™ืช?
08:45
Or should they both change their practices
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ืื• ื”ืื ืฉืชื™ื”ืŸ ืฆืจื™ื›ื•ืช ืœืฉื ื•ืช ืืช ื”ื”ืจื’ืœื™ื
08:48
so they can have much more flexible schedules?
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ื›ื“ื™ ืฉื™ื•ื›ืœ ืœื”ื™ื•ืช ืœื”ืŸ ืœื•ื—ื•ืช ื–ืžื ื™ื ื’ืžื™ืฉื™ื?
08:51
And what criteria should they use
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ื•ื‘ืื™ื–ื” ืงืจื™ื˜ืจื™ื•ืŸ ื”ืŸ ืฆืจื™ื›ื•ืช ืœื”ืฉืชืžืฉ
08:53
to make that decision?
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ื‘ื›ื“ื™ ืœืงื‘ืœ ืืช ื”ื”ื—ืœื˜ื”?
08:54
Is it who makes the most money
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ื”ืื ื–ื• ืฉืžืจื•ื™ื—ื” ืืช ืจื•ื‘ ื”ื›ืกืฃ
08:56
or who is most committed to her career?
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ืื• ื–ื• ืฉืžื—ื•ื™ื™ื‘ืช ื™ื•ืชืจ ืœืงืจื™ื™ืจื” ืฉืœื”?
09:00
Or who has the most flexible boss?
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ืื• ื–ื• ืฉื™ืฉ ืœื” ืืช ื”ื‘ื•ืก ื”ื’ืžื™ืฉ ื‘ื™ื•ืชืจ?
09:04
The same-sex perspective helps us see
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ื”ืคืจืกืคืงื˜ื™ื‘ื” ืฉืœ ื—ื“ ืžื™ื ื™ื™ื ืขื•ื–ืจืช ืœื ื• ืœืจืื•ืช
09:08
that juggling work and family
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ืฉืœืชืžืจืŸ ื‘ื™ืŸ ืขื‘ื•ื“ื” ื•ืžืฉืคื—ื”
09:10
are not women's problems,
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ื”ื™ื ืื™ื ื” ื‘ืขื™ื” ืฉืœ ื ืฉื™ื,
09:12
they're family problems.
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ื”ื™ื ื‘ืขื™ื™ื” ืžืฉืคื—ืชื™ืช.
09:15
And Sarah and Emily are the lucky ones,
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ืฉืจื” ื•ืืžื™ืœื™ ื”ืŸ ื‘ืจื•ืช ืžื–ืœ,
09:18
because they have a choice
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ื›ื™ ื™ืฉ ืœื”ืŸ ื‘ื—ื™ืจื”
09:20
about how much they want to work.
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ืฉืœ ื›ืžื” ื”ืŸ ืจื•ืฆื•ืช ืœืขื‘ื•ื“.
09:22
Millions of men and women
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ืžื™ืœื™ื•ื ื™ ื’ื‘ืจื™ื ื•ื ืฉื™ื
09:25
have to be both breadwinners and caregivers
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ืžื•ื›ืจื—ื™ื ืœื”ื™ื•ืช ื’ื ื”ืžืคืจื ืกื™ื ื•ื’ื ื”ืžื˜ืคืœื™ื
09:28
just to earn the income they need,
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ืจืง ื‘ืฉื‘ื™ืœ ืœื”ืจื•ื•ื™ื— ืืช ื”ื”ื›ื ืกื” ืฉื”ื ืฆืจื™ื›ื™ื,
09:32
and many of those workers are scrambling.
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ื•ื”ืจื‘ื” ืžื”ืขื•ื‘ื“ื™ื ื”ืืœื” ื ืื‘ืงื™ื.
09:35
They're patching together care arrangements
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ื”ื ืžื—ื‘ืจื™ื ื™ื—ื“ ืกื™ื“ื•ืจื™ ื˜ื™ืคื•ืœื™ื
09:37
that are inadequate
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ืฉื”ื ืœืงื•ื™ื™ื
09:39
and often actually unsafe.
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ื•ืœืขื™ืชื™ื ืงืจื•ื‘ื•ืช ืœื ื‘ื˜ื•ื—ื™ื.
09:41
If breadwinning and caregiving are really equal,
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ืื ืคืจื ืกื” ื•ื˜ื™ืคื•ืœ ื”ื ืื›ืŸ ืฉื•ื•ื™ื,
09:46
then why shouldn't a government
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ืื– ืœืžื” ืฉืžืžืฉืœื” ืœื
09:47
invest as much in an infrastructure of care
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ืชืฉืงื™ืข ื‘ืชืฉืชื™ืช ื”ื˜ื™ืคื•ืœ
09:51
as the foundation of a healthy society
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ื›ื‘ืกื™ืก ืœืงื”ื™ืœื” ื‘ืจื™ืื”
09:55
as it invests in physical infrastructure
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ื›ืžื• ืฉื”ื™ื ืžืฉืงื™ืขื” ื‘ืชืฉืชื™ืช ื”ืคื™ื–ื™ืช
09:58
as the backbone of a successful economy?
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ื‘ืชื•ืจ ืขืžื•ื“ ื”ืฉื“ืจื” ืฉืœ ื›ืœื›ืœื” ืžื•ืฆืœื—ืช?
10:02
The governments that get it --
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ื”ืžืžืฉืœื•ืช ืฉืžื‘ื™ื ื•ืช ืืช ื–ื”--
10:04
no surprises here --
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ื‘ืื•ืคืŸ ืœื ืžืคืชื™ืข--
10:06
the governments that get it,
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ื”ืžืžืฉืœื•ืช ืฉืžื‘ื™ื ื•ืช ืืช ื–ื”,
10:08
Norway, Sweden, Denmark, the Netherlands,
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ื ื•ืจื‘ื’ื™ื”, ืฉื•ื•ื“ื™ื”, ื“ื ืžืจืง, ื”ื•ืœื ื“,
10:13
provide universal child care,
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ืžืกืคืงื•ืช ื˜ื™ืคื•ืœ ื™ืœื“ื™ื ืื•ื ื™ื‘ืจืกืœื™,
10:16
support for caregivers at home,
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ืชืžื™ื›ื” ืœืžื˜ืคืœื™ื ื‘ื‘ื™ืช,
10:18
school and early childhood education,
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ื‘ืชื™ ืกืคืจ ื•ื”ืฉื›ืœื” ืžื•ืงื“ืžืช ืœื™ืœื“ื™ื,
10:21
protections for pregnant women,
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ื”ื’ื ื•ืช ืœื ืฉื™ื ื‘ื”ืจื™ื•ืŸ,
10:23
and care for the elderly and the disabled.
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ื•ื˜ื™ืคื•ืœ ืœืžื‘ื•ื’ืจื™ื ื•ืœืžื•ื’ื‘ืœื™ื.
10:27
Those governments invest in that infrastructure
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ื”ืžืžืฉืœื•ืช ื”ืืœื” ืžืฉืงื™ืขื•ืช ื‘ืชืฉืชื™ืช ื–ื•
10:31
the same way they invest in roads and bridges
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ื›ืžื• ืฉื”ืŸ ืžืฉืงื™ืขื•ืช ื‘ื›ื‘ื™ืฉื™ื, ื’ืฉืจื™ื,
10:34
and tunnels and trains.
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ืžื ื”ืจื•ืช ื•ืจื›ื‘ื•ืช.
10:38
Those societies also show you
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ื”ืื•ื›ืœื•ืกื™ื•ืช ื”ืืœื” ื’ื ืžืจืื•ืช ืœื ื•
10:40
that breadwinning and caregiving
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ืฉืคืจื ืกื” ื•ื˜ื™ืคื•ืœ
10:42
reinforce each other.
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ืžื—ื–ืงื™ื ืื—ื“ ืืช ื”ืฉื ื™.
10:45
They routinely rank among the top 15 countries
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ื”ืŸ ื‘ืื•ืคืŸ ืฉื’ืจืชื™ ืžื“ื•ืจื’ื•ืช ื‘ื™ืŸ 15 ื”ืžื“ื™ื ื•ืช ื”ืžื•ื‘ื™ืœื•ืช
10:51
of the most globally competitive economies,
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ืžื‘ื—ื™ื ืช ืชื—ืจื•ืช ืžืฉืงื™ืช ื’ืœื•ื‘ืœื™ืช,
10:54
but at the same time,
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ืื‘ืœ ื‘ืื•ืชื• ื”ื–ืžืŸ,
10:56
they rank very high on the OECD Better Life Index.
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ื”ืŸ ืžื“ื•ืจื’ื•ืช ืžืื•ื“ ื’ื‘ื•ื” ื‘ืžื“ื“ ื”- OECD ืœื—ื™ื™ื ื˜ื•ื‘ื™ื ื™ื•ืชืจ.
11:00
In fact, they rank higher than other governments,
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ืœืžืขืฉื”, ื”ืŸ ืžื“ื•ืจื’ื•ืช ื’ื‘ื•ื” ื™ื•ืชืจ ืžืžืžืฉืœื•ืช ืื—ืจื•ืช,
11:04
like my own, the U.S., or Switzerland,
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ื›ืžื• ืฉืœื™- ืืจื”"ื‘, ืื• ืฉื•ื•ื™ืฅ,
11:06
that have higher average levels of income
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ืฉื™ืฉ ืœื”ืŸ ืžืžื•ืฆืข ื’ื‘ื•ื” ื™ื•ืชืจ ืฉืœ ื”ื›ื ืกื”
11:09
but lower rankings on work-life balance.
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ืื‘ืœ ื“ื™ืจื•ื’ ื ืžื•ืš ื™ื•ืชืจ ืฉืœ ืื™ื–ื•ืŸ ื—ื™ื™ื - ืคืจื ืกื”.
11:15
So changing our workplaces
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ืื– ืฉื™ื ื•ื™ ืžืงื•ืžื•ืช ื”ืขื‘ื•ื“ื” ืฉืœื ื•
11:18
and building infrastructures of care
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ื•ื‘ื ื™ื™ืช ืชืฉืชื™ืช ืฉืœ ื˜ื™ืคื•ืœ
11:21
would make a big difference,
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ื™ื—ื•ืœืœ ืฉื™ื ื•ื™ ืžืฉืžืขื•ืชื™,
11:23
but we're not going to get equally valued choices
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ืื‘ืœ ืื ื—ื ื• ืœื ื”ื•ืœื›ื™ื ืœืงื‘ืœ ื‘ื—ื™ืจื•ืช ื‘ืฆื•ืจื” ืฉื•ื•ื”
11:27
unless we change our culture,
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ืืœื ืื ื›ืŸ ื ืฉื ื” ืืช ื”ืชืจื‘ื•ืช ืฉืœื ื•,
11:30
and the kind of cultural change required
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ื•ื”ืฉื™ื ื•ื™ ื”ืชืจื‘ื•ืชื™ ื”ืžืชื‘ืงืฉ
11:33
means re-socializing men.
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ืžืฉืžืขื•ืชื• ื—ื‘ืจืชื™ื•ืช ืžื—ื•ื“ืฉืช ืฉืœ ื’ื‘ืจื™ื.
11:35
(Applause)
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(ืžื—ื™ืื•ืช ื›ืคื™ื™ื)
11:39
Increasingly in developed countries,
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ื™ื•ืชืจ ื•ื™ื•ืชืจ ื‘ืžื“ื™ื ื•ืช ืžืชืคืชื—ื•ืช,
11:41
women are socialized to believe that our place
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ื”ื—ื‘ืจื” ื’ื•ืจืžืช ืœื ืฉื™ื ืœื”ืืžื™ืŸ ืฉืžืงื•ืžื ื•
11:44
is no longer only in the home,
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ื”ื•ื ื›ื‘ืจ ืœื ืจืง ื‘ื‘ื™ืช,
11:48
but men are actually still where they always were.
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ืื‘ืœ ื”ื’ื‘ืจื™ื ื‘ืขืฆื ื ื•ืชืจื• ืื™ืคื” ืฉืชืžื™ื“ ื”ื™ื•.
11:52
Men are still socialized to believe
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ื”ื—ื‘ืจื” ืขื“ื™ื™ืŸ ื’ื•ืจืžืช ืœื’ื‘ืจื™ื ืœื”ืืžื™ืŸ
11:56
that they have to be breadwinners,
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ืฉื”ื ืฆืจื™ื›ื™ื ืœื”ื™ื•ืช ื”ืžืคืจื ืกื™ื,
11:58
that to derive their self-worth
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ืฉื”ื ืžืคื™ืงื™ื ืืช ืขืจื›ื ื”ืขืฆืžื™
12:01
from how high they can climb over other men
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ืžื›ืžื” ื’ื‘ื•ื” ื”ื ื™ื›ื•ืœื™ื ืœื˜ืคืก ืžืขืœ ื’ื‘ืจื™ื ืื—ืจื™ื
12:04
on a career ladder.
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ื‘ืกื•ืœื ื”ืงืจื™ื™ืจื”.
12:06
The feminist revolution still has a long way to go.
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ืœืžื”ืคื›ื” ื”ืคืžื™ื ื™ืกื˜ื™ืช ืขื•ื“ ื™ืฉ ื“ืจืš ืืจื•ื›ื” ืœืขืฉื•ืช.
12:09
It's certainly not complete.
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ื”ื™ื ื‘ื”ื—ืœื˜ ืœื ื”ื•ืฉืœืžื”.
12:11
But 60 years after
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ืื‘ืœ 60 ืฉื ื” ืื—ืจื™
12:13
"The Feminine Mystique" was published,
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ืฉื”ืกืคืจ 'ื”ืžื™ืกืชื•ืจื™ืŸ ื”ื ืฉื™' ื”ื•ืฆื ืœืื•ืจ,
12:15
many women actually have
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ืœื”ืจื‘ื” ืžื”ื ืฉื™ื ืื›ืŸ ื™ืฉ
12:17
more choices than men do.
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ื™ื•ืชืจ ื‘ื—ื™ืจื•ืช ืžืืฉืจ ืœื’ื‘ืจื™ื.
12:20
We can decide to be a breadwinner,
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ื‘ื™ื›ื•ืœืชื ื• ืœื‘ื—ื•ืจ ืื ืœื”ื™ื•ืช ื”ืžืคืจื ืก,
12:23
a caregiver, or any combination of the two.
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ื”ืžื˜ืคืœ, ืื• ื›ืœ ืฉื™ืœื•ื‘ ืฉืœ ื”ืฉื ื™ื™ื.
12:27
When a man, on the other hand,
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ืžืฆื“ ืฉื ื™, ื›ืฉื”ื’ื‘ืจ
12:30
decides to be a caregiver,
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ืžื—ืœื™ื˜ ืœื”ื™ื•ืช ื”ืžื˜ืคืœ,
12:32
he puts his manhood on the line.
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ื”ื•ื ืžืขืžื™ื“ ืืช ื’ื‘ืจื™ื•ืชื• ื‘'ืกื›ื ื”'.
12:36
His friends may praise his decision,
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ื™ื›ื•ืœ ืœื”ื™ื•ืช ืฉื—ื‘ืจื™ื ืฉืœื• ื™ืฉื‘ื—ื• ืืช ื”ื—ืœื˜ืชื•,
12:39
but underneath, they're scratching their heads.
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ืื‘ืœ ืžื‘ืคื ื™ื, ื”ื ืžื’ืจื“ื™ื ืืช ืจืืฉื.
12:43
Isn't the measure of a man
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ื”ืื™ืŸ ืขืจื›ื• ืฉืœ ื”ื’ื‘ืจ ื ืžื“ื“ ืœืคื™
12:46
his willingness to compete with other men
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ื”ื ื›ื•ื ื•ืช ืฉืœื• ืœื”ืชื—ืจื•ืช ืขื ื’ื‘ืจื™ื ืื—ืจื™ื
12:49
for power and prestige?
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ืขืœ ืขื•ืฆืžื” ื•ื™ื•ืงืจื”?
12:51
And as many women hold that view as men do.
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ื•ืื•ืชื” ืžื™ื“ื” ืฉืœ ื ืฉื™ื ืžื—ื–ื™ืงื•ืช ื‘ื“ืขื” ื–ื• ื›ืžื™ื“ืช ื”ื’ื‘ืจื™ื.
12:55
We know that lots of women
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ืื ื—ื ื• ื™ื•ื“ืขื™ื ืฉื”ืจื‘ื” ื ืฉื™ื
12:58
still judge the attractiveness of a man
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ืขื“ื™ื™ืŸ ืžื•ื“ื“ื•ืช ืืช ื”ืžืฉื™ื›ื” ืฉืœ ื”ื’ื‘ืจ
13:02
based in large part on how successful he is
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ื‘ื”ืชื‘ืกืก ื‘ืžื™ื“ื” ืจื‘ื” ืขืœ ืžื™ื“ืช ื”ื”ืฆืœื—ื” ืฉืœื•
13:04
in his career.
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ื‘ืงืจื™ื™ืจื” ืฉืœื•.
13:06
A woman can drop out of the work force
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ืืฉื” ื™ื›ื•ืœื” ืœื ืฉื•ืจ ืžื›ื— ื”ืขื‘ื•ื“ื”
13:08
and still be an attractive partner.
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ื•ืขื“ื™ื™ืŸ ืœื”ื™ื•ืช ื‘ืช ื–ื•ื’ ืžื•ืฉื›ืช.
13:10
For a man, that's a risky proposition.
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ืœื’ื‘ืจ, ื–ื• ื”ื ื—ื” ืžืกื•ื›ื ืช.
13:15
So as parents and partners,
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ืื– ื›ื”ื•ืจื™ื ื•ื›ื‘ื ื•ืช- ื–ื•ื’,
13:17
we should be socializing our sons
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ืื ื—ื ื• ืฆืจื™ื›ื•ืช ืœื”ืฉืคื™ืข ืขืœ ื‘ื ื™ื ื•
13:20
and our husbands
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ื•ืขืœ ื‘ืขืœื™ื ื•
13:23
to be whatever they want to be,
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ืœื”ื™ื•ืช ืžื” ืฉื”ื ืจื•ืฆื™ื ืœื”ื™ื•ืช,
13:26
either caregivers or breadwinners.
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ื‘ื™ืŸ ืื ื–ื” ืžื˜ืคืœื™ื ื•ื‘ื™ืŸ ืื ื–ื” ืžืคืจื ืกื™ื.
13:30
We should be socializing them to make caregiving
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ืื ื—ื ื• ืฆืจื™ื›ื•ืช ืœื”ืฉืคื™ืข ืขืœื™ื”ื ืœื”ืคื•ืš ื˜ื™ืคื•ืœ
13:33
cool for guys.
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ืœืžืฉื”ื• ืžื’ื ื™ื‘ ื‘ืฉื‘ื™ืœ ื’ื‘ืจื™ื.
13:35
(Applause)
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(ืžื—ื™ืื•ืช ื›ืคื™ื™ื)
13:39
I can almost hear lots of you thinking, "No way."
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ืื ื™ ื›ืžืขื˜ ื™ื›ื•ืœื” ืœืฉืžื•ืข ืืช ืจื•ื‘ื›ื ื—ื•ืฉื‘ื™ื, "ืื™ืŸ ืžืฆื‘."
13:45
But in fact, the change is actually already happening.
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ืื‘ืœ ืœืžืขืฉื”, ื”ืฉื™ื ื•ื™ ื›ื‘ืจ ืงื•ืจื”.
13:50
At least in the United States,
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ืœืคื—ื•ืช ื‘ืืจื”"ื‘,
13:52
lots of men take pride in cooking,
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ื”ืจื‘ื” ื’ื‘ืจื™ื ืžืชื’ืื™ื ื‘ื‘ื™ืฉื•ืœ,
13:54
and frankly obsess over stoves.
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ื•ืœืžืขืŸ ื”ืืžืช ืขื•ืžื“ื™ื ื‘ื›ืคื™ืชื™ื•ืช ืœื™ื“ ื”ื›ื™ืจื™ื™ื.
13:57
They are in the birthing rooms.
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ื”ื ื ืžืฆืื™ื ื‘ื—ื“ืจื™ ืœื™ื“ื”,
14:00
They take paternity leave when they can.
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ื”ื ืœื•ืงื—ื™ื ื—ื•ืคืฉืช ืœื™ื“ื” ื›ืฉื”ื ื™ื›ื•ืœื™ื.
14:03
They can walk a baby or soothe a toddler
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ื”ื ื™ื›ื•ืœื™ื ืœื”ื•ืฆื™ื ืชื™ื ื•ืง ืœื˜ื™ื•ืœ ืื• ืœื”ืจื’ื™ืข ื–ืื˜ื•ื˜
14:05
just as well as their wives can,
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ื‘ืื•ืชื” ืžื™ื“ื” ื›ืžื• ื ืฉื•ืชื™ื”ื,
14:08
and they are increasingly
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ื•ื”ื ื‘ื”ื“ืจื’ื” ืœื•ืงื—ื™ื ื—ืœืง ื’ื“ื•ืœ ื™ื•ืชืจ
14:10
doing much more of the housework.
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ื‘ืขื‘ื•ื“ื•ืช ื”ื‘ื™ืช.
14:12
Indeed, there are male college students now
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ืื›ืŸ, ื™ืฉ ืขื›ืฉื™ื• ืชืœืžื™ื“ื™ ืื•ื ื™ื‘ืจืกื™ื˜ืื•ืช
14:14
who are starting to say,
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ืฉืžืชื—ื™ืœื™ื ืœื•ืžืจ
14:16
"I want to be a stay-at-home dad."
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"ืื ื™ ืจื•ืฆื” ืœื”ื™ื•ืช ืื‘ื ืฉื ืฉืืจ ื‘ื‘ื™ืช."
14:18
That was completely unthinkable
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ื–ื” ื”ื™ื” ืœื’ืžืจื™ ืœื ื ืœืงื— ื‘ื—ืฉื‘ื•ืŸ
14:20
50 or even 30 years ago.
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ืœืคื ื™ 50 ืื• ืืคื™ืœื• 30 ืฉื ื”.
14:23
And in Norway, where men have
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ื•ื‘ื ื•ืจื•ื•ื’ื™ื”, ืื™ืคื” ืฉื’ื‘ืจื™ื ืื•ื˜ื•ืžื˜ื™ืช
14:26
an automatic three month's paternity leave,
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ืžืงื‘ืœื™ื ื—ื•ืคืฉืช ืœื™ื“ื” ืฉืœ 3 ื—ื•ื“ืฉื™ื,
14:29
but they lose it if they decide not to take it,
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ืื‘ืœ ื”ื ืžืคืกื™ื“ื™ื ืื•ืชื” ืื ื”ื ืžื—ืœื™ื˜ื™ื ืœื ืœืงื—ืช ืื•ืชื”,
14:32
a high government official told me
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ื ืฆื™ื’ ืžืžืฉืœืชื™ ื‘ื›ื™ืจ ืืžืจ ืœื™
14:34
that companies are starting to look
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ืฉื—ื‘ืจื•ืช ืžืชื—ื™ืœื•ืช ืœื‘ื—ื•ืŸ
14:36
at prospective male employees
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ืขื•ื‘ื“ื™ื ื’ื‘ืจื™ื ืคื•ื˜ื ืฆื™ืืœื™ื
14:38
and raise an eyebrow if they didn't in fact
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ื•ื”ื ืžืจื™ืžื™ื ื’ื‘ื” ืื ืœืžืขืฉื” ื”ื’ื‘ืจ
14:42
take their leave when they had kids.
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ืœื ื ื™ืฆืœ ืืช ื—ื•ืคืฉืช ื”ืœื™ื“ื” ื›ืฉื ื•ืœื“ื• ืœื• ื™ืœื“ื™ื.
14:45
That means that it's starting to seem
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ื–ื” ืื•ืžืจ ืฉื–ื” ืžืชื—ื™ืœ ืœื”ื™ื—ืฉื‘
14:47
like a character defect
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ื›ืคื’ื ืื•ืคื™
14:50
not to want to be a fully engaged father.
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ืœื ืœืจืฆื•ืช ืœื”ื™ื•ืช ืื‘ื ืžืขื•ืจื‘ ื‘ืฆื•ืจื” ืžืœืื”.
14:57
So I was raised
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ืื– ืื ื™ ื—ื•ื ื›ืชื™
15:02
to believe that championing women's rights
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ืœื”ืืžื™ืŸ ืฉืชืžื™ื›ื” ื‘ื–ื›ื•ื™ื•ืช ื”ื ืฉื™ื
15:06
meant doing everything we could
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ืžืฉืžืขื•ืชื” ืœืขืฉื•ืช ื›ื›ืœ ื™ื›ื•ืœืชื ื•
15:08
to get women to the top.
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ื›ื“ื™ ืœื”ื‘ื™ื ืืช ื”ืืฉื” ืœืคืกื’ื”.
15:10
And I still hope that I live long enough
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ื•ืื ื™ ืขื“ื™ื™ืŸ ืžืงื•ื•ื” ืœื”ืืจื™ืš ืฉื ื™ื ืžืกืคื™ืง
15:13
to see men and women equally represented
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ื›ื“ื™ ืœืจืื•ืช ื’ื‘ืจื™ื ื•ื ืฉื™ื ืžื™ื•ืฆื’ื™ื ื‘ืฉื•ื•ื™ื•ืŸ
15:16
at all levels of the work force.
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ื‘ื›ืœ ื”ืจืžื•ืช ืฉืœ ื›ื— ื”ืขื‘ื•ื“ื”.
15:19
But I've come to believe that we have to value family
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ืื‘ืœ ืื ื™ ืžืืžื™ื ื” ืฉืื ื—ื ื• ืฆืจื™ื›ื™ื ืœื”ืขืจื™ืš ืžืฉืคื—ื”
15:23
every bit as much as we value work,
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ื‘ื“ื™ื•ืง ื‘ืื•ืชื” ืžื™ื“ื” ืฉืื ื—ื ื• ืžืขืจื™ื›ื™ื ืขื‘ื•ื“ื”,
15:26
and that we should entertain the idea
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ื•ืฉืื ื—ื ื• ืฆืจื™ื›ื™ื ืœืฉืงื•ืœ ืืช ื”ืจืขื™ื•ืŸ
15:28
that doing right by those we love
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ืฉืœืขืฉื•ืช ืืช ืžื” ืฉื ื›ื•ืŸ ืขื ืื ืฉื™ื ืฉืื ื—ื ื• ืื•ื”ื‘ื™ื
15:32
will make all of us better at everything we do.
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ื™ื”ืคื•ืš ืืช ื›ื•ืœื ื• ืœื˜ื•ื‘ื™ื ื™ื•ืชืจ ื‘ืžื” ืฉืื ื—ื ื• ืขื•ืฉื™ื.
15:36
Thirty years ago, Carol Gilligan,
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ืœืคื ื™ ืฉืœื•ืฉื™ื ืฉื ื”, ืงืืจื•ืœ ื’ื™ืœื™ื’ืŸ,
15:38
a wonderful psychologist, studied adolescent girls
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ืคืกื™ื›ื•ืœื•ื’ื™ืช ื ืคืœืื”, ื—ืงืจื” ื ืขืจื•ืช ืžืชื‘ื’ืจื•ืช
15:41
and identified an ethic of care,
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ื•ื”ื‘ื—ื™ื ื” ื‘ืืชื™ืงื” ืฉืœ ื˜ื™ืคื•ืœ,
15:44
an element of human nature every bit as important
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ืžืจื›ื™ื‘ ืฉืœ ื˜ื‘ืข ืื ื•ืฉื™ ื—ืฉื•ื‘ ื‘ืื•ืชื” ืจืžื”
15:47
as the ethic of justice.
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ื›ืžื• ื”ืžื•ืกืจ ืฉืœ ืฆื“ืง.
15:49
It turns out that "you don't care"
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ืžืกืชื‘ืจ ืฉ"ืœื ืื™ื›ืคืช ืœืš"
15:52
is just as much a part of who we are
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ื–ื” ื—ืœืง ืžืžื™ ืฉืื ื—ื ื•
15:55
as "that's not fair."
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ื‘ื“ื™ื•ืง ื›ืžื• "ื–ื” ืœื ื”ื•ื’ืŸ."
15:58
Bill Gates agrees.
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ื‘ื™ืœ ื’ื™ื™ื˜ืก ืžืกื›ื™ื.
15:59
He argues that the two great forces of human nature
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ื”ื•ื ื˜ื•ืขืŸ ืฉืฉื ื™ ื”ื›ื•ื—ื•ืช ื”ื’ื“ื•ืœื™ื ืฉืœ ื˜ื‘ืข ื”ืื“ื
16:03
are self-interest and caring for others.
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ื”ื ืื™ื ื˜ืจืก ืขืฆืžื™ ื•ื“ืื’ื” ืœืื—ืจื™ื.
16:07
Let's bring them both together.
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ื‘ื•ืื• ื ื—ื‘ืจ ืื•ืชื ื‘ื™ื—ื“.
16:09
Let's make the feminist revolution
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ื‘ื•ืื• ื ื”ืคื•ืš ืืช ืžื”ืคื›ืช ื”ื ืฉื™ื
16:12
a humanist revolution.
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ืœืžื”ืคื›ื” ื”ื•ืžื ื™ืกื˜ื™ืช.
16:15
As whole human beings,
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ื›ื•ืœื ื• ื›ืื ืฉื™ื,
16:17
we will be better caregivers and breadwinners.
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ื ื”ื™ื” ืžืคืจื ืกื™ื ื•ืžื˜ืคืœื™ื ื˜ื•ื‘ื™ื ื™ื•ืชืจ.
16:20
You may think that can't happen,
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ืืชื ื™ื›ื•ืœื™ื ืœื—ืฉื•ื‘ ืฉื–ื” ืœื ื™ื›ื•ืœ ืœืงืจื•ืช,
16:23
but I grew up in a society
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ืื‘ืœ ืื ื™ ื’ื“ืœืชื™ ื‘ื—ื‘ืจื”
16:24
where my mother put out small vases
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ืฉื‘ื” ืืžื ืฉืœื™ ื”ื™ื™ืชื” ืฉืžื” ืฆื ืฆื ื•ืช ืงื˜ื ื•ืช
16:27
of cigarettes for dinner parties,
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ืฉืœ ืกื™ื’ืจื™ื•ืช ืœืžืกื™ื‘ื•ืช ืขืจื‘,
16:29
where blacks and whites used separate bathrooms,
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ื‘ื” ืœื‘ื ื™ื ื•ืฉื—ื•ืจื™ื ื”ืฉืชืžืฉื• ื‘ืฉื™ืจื•ืชื™ื ื ืคืจื“ื™ื,
16:33
and where everybody claimed to be heterosexual.
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ื•ื›ื•ืœื ื˜ืขื ื• ืฉื”ื ื”ื˜ืจื•ืกืงืกื•ืืœื™ื.
16:40
Today, not so much.
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ื”ื™ื•ื, ืœื ื›ืœ ื›ืš.
16:45
The revolution for human equality
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ื”ืžื”ืคื™ื›ื” ืœืฉื•ื•ื™ื•ืŸ ืื ื•ืฉื™
16:48
can happen.
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ื™ื›ื•ืœื” ืœืงืจื•ืช.
16:50
It is happening.
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ื”ื™ื ืงื•ืจื™ืช.
16:52
It will happen.
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ื”ื™ื ืชืงืจื”.
16:54
How far and how fast is up to us.
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ื›ืžื” ืจื—ื•ืง ื•ื›ืžื” ืžื”ืจ- ื–ื” ื‘ื™ื“ื™ื™ื ืฉืœื ื•.
16:59
Thank you.
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ืชื•ื“ื” ืจื‘ื”.
17:01
(Applause)
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(ืžื—ื™ืื•ืช ื›ืคื™ื™ื)
ืขืœ ืืชืจ ื–ื”

ืืชืจ ื–ื” ื™ืฆื™ื’ ื‘ืคื ื™ื›ื ืกืจื˜ื•ื ื™ YouTube ื”ืžื•ืขื™ืœื™ื ืœืœื™ืžื•ื“ ืื ื’ืœื™ืช. ืชื•ื›ืœื• ืœืจืื•ืช ืฉื™ืขื•ืจื™ ืื ื’ืœื™ืช ื”ืžื•ืขื‘ืจื™ื ืขืœ ื™ื“ื™ ืžื•ืจื™ื ืžื”ืฉื•ืจื” ื”ืจืืฉื•ื ื” ืžืจื—ื‘ื™ ื”ืขื•ืœื. ืœื—ืฅ ืคืขืžื™ื™ื ืขืœ ื”ื›ืชื•ื‘ื™ื•ืช ื‘ืื ื’ืœื™ืช ื”ืžื•ืฆื’ื•ืช ื‘ื›ืœ ื“ืฃ ื•ื™ื“ืื• ื›ื“ื™ ืœื”ืคืขื™ืœ ืืช ื”ืกืจื˜ื•ืŸ ืžืฉื. ื”ื›ืชื•ื‘ื™ื•ืช ื’ื•ืœืœื•ืช ื‘ืกื ื›ืจื•ืŸ ืขื ื”ืคืขืœืช ื”ื•ื•ื™ื“ืื•. ืื ื™ืฉ ืœืš ื”ืขืจื•ืช ืื• ื‘ืงืฉื•ืช, ืื ื ืฆื•ืจ ืื™ืชื ื• ืงืฉืจ ื‘ืืžืฆืขื•ืช ื˜ื•ืคืก ื™ืฆื™ืจืช ืงืฉืจ ื–ื”.

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