How cohousing can make us happier (and live longer) | Grace Kim

翻译人员: Qing Ying Sun 校对人员: Conway Ye

Loneliness.

孤独。

All of us in this room will experience loneliness

在此的所有人，在生命中的

at some point in our lives.

某时某刻都会感到孤独。

Loneliness is not a function of being alone,

孤独不仅取决于是否独自一人，

but rather, a function of how socially connected you are

还取决于你与周围其他人之间的

to those around you.

社交关系。

There could be somebody in this room right now

此时此刻此地，

surrounded by a thousand people

也许有人与千百人共处一室，

experiencing loneliness.

却依然感到孤独。

虽然有许多因素可能导致孤独，

And while loneliness can be attributed to many things,

as an architect,

作为一名建筑师，

I'm going to tell you today how loneliness can be the result

今天我想跟大家聊聊我们身处的环境

of our built environments --

会如何导致孤独——

the very homes we choose to live in.

也就是我们自己选择居住的房屋。

Let's take a look at this house.

我们来看看这栋房子。

It's a nice house.

这是一栋美丽的房子。

There's a big yard, picket fence,

它有一个大院子，围着栅栏，

还配备双车库。

two-car garage.

And the home might be in a neighborhood like this.

这栋房子周边的环境可能是这样的。

And for many people around the globe,

这个世界上很多人都梦想

this home, this neighborhood --

在这样的一个小区里

it's a dream.

拥有一栋这样的房子。

And yet the danger of achieving this dream

然而梦想成真的同时

is a false sense of connection

也意味着虚假的联系感

and an increase in social isolation.

以及更强烈的社会隔绝感。

I know, I can hear you now,

我知道，我非常理解，

there's somebody in the room screaming at me inside their head,

你们当中有人在脑海中大喊，

"That's my house, and that's my neighborhood,

“我家就这样呀，我家周边也是这样！

and I know everyone on my block!"

周边邻居我都认识！”

To which I would answer, "Terrific!"

那么我告诉你，这太棒了！

And I wish there were more people like you,

我真希望能有更多人像你一样，

because I'd wager to guess there's more people in the room

因为据我猜测，这里有更多人

living in a similar situation

生活在类似的环境中，

that might not know their neighbors.

却并不一定认识他们的邻居。

They might recognize them and say hello,

他们也许只是点头之交，

but under their breath,

然而却常常忍不住私下询问

they're asking their spouse,

各自的丈夫或妻子，

“刚刚那个人叫什么来着？”

"What was their name again?"

so they can ask a question by name to signify they know them.

这样才能正确称呼对方 以证明彼此是相识的。

Social media also contributes to this false sense of connection.

社交网络的存在也 加剧了这种虚假的联系感。

This image is probably all too familiar.

这样的场景是不是很熟悉？

You're standing in the elevator,

站在电梯里，

坐在咖啡馆里，

sitting in a cafe,

and you look around,

你抬头张望一番，

and everyone's on their phone.

却发现所有人都在低头看手机。

You're not texting or checking Facebook,

除了你，其他人都在发短信

或者刷脸书。

but everyone else is,

and maybe, like me, you've been in a situation

也许，你也像我一样经历过以下场景：

where you've made eye contact,

你跟他人进行了眼神接触，

smiled and said hello,

给对方一个微笑并且打了个招呼，

却见对方仓促拔掉耳机，

and have that person yank out their earbuds

and say, "I'm sorry, what did you say?"

说了句：“不好意思，你刚才说什么？”

I find this incredibly isolating.

这让我产生了强烈的疏离感。

The concept I'd like to share with you today

今天我想要跟大家分享的概念就是

is an antidote to isolation.

一种对抗疏离感的解药。

It's not a new concept.

这并不是一个新概念。

In fact, it's an age-old way of living,

相反，这是一种古老的生活方式。

and it still exists in many non-European cultures

并且，它依然存在于全世界上许多

around the world.

欧美以外的文化中。

And about 50 years ago,

大约50年前，

the Danes decided to make up a new name,

丹麦人决定发明一个新名词，

and since then,

从那时开始，

tens of thousands of Danish people have been living in this connected way.

几万丹麦人开始遵循这种生活方式。

And it's being pursued more widely around the globe

世界各地渴望社区生活的人们

as people are seeking community.

也逐渐开始追求这种方式。

This concept

这个概念叫做

is cohousing.

共同住宅。

Cohousing is an intentional neighborhood where people know each other

共同住宅是一种更亲密的邻里关系，

and look after one another.

人们相互熟识，守望相助。

In cohousing, you have your own home,

在共同住宅里， 人们有各自的私人住宅，

but you also share significant spaces, both indoors and out.

同时也共享广大的 公用空间，无论室内还是室外。

Before I show you some pictures of cohousing,

在我为大家展示一些 共同住宅的画面之前，

I'd like to first introduce you to my friends Sheila and Spencer.

我想先介绍我的朋友，希拉与斯潘塞。

When I first met Sheila and Spencer, they were just entering their 60s,

当我刚认识希拉与斯潘塞的时候， 他们年逾六旬，

and Spencer was looking ahead at the end of a long career

当时斯潘塞在小学教育的漫长事业

即将迎来尾声。

in elementary education.

And he really disliked the idea

然而他无法想象

that he might not have children in his life

没有孩子们围绕身边的

upon retirement.

退休生活。

They're now my neighbors.

如今，他们成为了我的邻居。

We live in a cohousing community that I not only designed,

我们一起居住在一片 由我设计开发的

but developed

共同住宅社区，

and have my architecture practice in.

而我的设计工作室也在那里。

This community is very intentional about our social interactions.

社交互动，是这个社区的重点元素。

So let me take you on a tour.

现在，让我带大家参观一下。

From the outside, we look like any other small apartment building.

从外面看来，我们的社区 跟其他小型公寓楼区别不大。

In fact, we look identical to the one next door,

说实话，跟隔壁楼看起来一模一样，

except that we're bright yellow.

除了这耀眼的明黄色。

Inside, the homes are fairly conventional.

住宅的内部格局也挺传统。

We all have living rooms and kitchens,

大家都有独立的客厅和厨房，

卧室与卫生间，

bedrooms and baths,

and there are nine of these homes around a central courtyard.

一共有九户这样的住宅， 围绕着中央大院。

This one's mine,

这一户，是我家，

and this one is Spencer and Sheila's.

而这一户是希拉与斯潘塞家。

The thing that makes this building uniquely cohousing

这栋公共住宅之所以独特，

are not the homes,

并非因为这些房间，

but rather, what happens here --

而是这里所发生的一切：

the social interactions that happen in and around that central courtyard.

也就是在这片中央大院 以及周围的社交互动。

When I look across the courtyard,

当我向院子对面张望时，

I look forward to see Spencer and Sheila.

我期待看到希拉与斯潘塞。

In fact, every morning, this is what I see,

事实上，每天清晨做早餐的时候，

Spencer waving at me furiously as we're making our breakfasts.

我都能看到斯潘塞热情地对我招手。

From our homes, we look down into the courtyard,

当我们从家里俯视楼下的院子，

and depending on the time of year,

根据每年的不同时期，

we see this:

我们可以看到这样的景象：

kids and grownups in various combinations

一些大人与孩子

playing and hanging out with each other.

成群结队的玩耍，互动。

There's a lot of giggling and chatter.

院子里充满欢声笑语。

There's a lot of hula-hooping.

很多人都会玩儿呼啦圈。

And every now and then, "Hey, quit hitting me!"

时不时能听到“嘿，别打我！”

or a cry from one of the kids.

或者偶尔的哭闹声。

These are the sounds of our daily lives,

这些都是日常生活的声音，

and the sounds of social connectedness.

更是代表着社会联系的音符。

At the bottom of the courtyard, there are a set of double doors,

在院子最里面有一扇双开门，

and those lead into the common house.

从那里进去就是公共大厅。

I consider the common house the secret sauce of cohousing.

在我看来，这个大厅 才是公共住宅的核心。

It's the secret sauce

因为这里是

because it's the place where the social interactions

所有社交互动以及

and community life begin,

社区生活的开始，

and from there, it radiates out through the rest of the community.

所有的一切从这里开始， 一直延伸到整个社区。

Inside our common house, we have a large dining room

我们的公共大厅里有一间宽敞的餐厅，

to seat all 28 of us and our guests,

可以容纳我们28人，包括我们的客人。

and we dine together three times a week.

每周有三个晚上大家会进行聚餐。

In support of those meals, we have a large kitchen

我们还有一个大厨房与之配套，

so that we can take turns cooking for each other

这样我们每次三人一组

in teams of three.

可以轮流掌勺。

So that means, with 17 adults,

也就是说，总共17个成年人，

I lead cook once every six weeks.

每隔六周，就会轮到我掌勺一次。

Two other times, I show up and help my team

还有两次，我会协助我的小组成员们

with the preparation and cleanup.

做前期准备或者打扫工作。

And all those other nights,

其他的日子，

I just show up.

我只需要出现就可以了。

I have dinner, talk with my neighbors,

我们共享晚餐，与邻居们聊天，

and I go home, having been fed a delicious meal

吃完为我精心准备的素食晚餐后，

我就能心满意足地回家了。

by someone who cares about my vegetarian preferences.

Our nine families have intentionally chosen

我们九个家庭，特意选择了

an alternative way of living.

这样一种非典型的生活方式。

Instead of pursuing the American dream,

与所谓的美国梦相悖，

where we might have been isolated in our single-family homes,

我们选择了公共住宅，而不是

we instead chose cohousing,

孤立隔绝的单一家庭住宅，

so that we can increase our social connections.

就为了能够加强彼此之间社会联系。

And that's how cohousing starts:

这就是公共住宅的本意：

追求协作生活的

with a shared intention

to live collaboratively.

共同意愿。

And intention is the single most important characteristic

而这种意愿才是共同住宅与

that differentiates cohousing from any other housing model.

其他住宅模式不同的地方。

And while intention is difficult to see

虽然意愿这种东西不易察觉，

or even show,

也难以示人，

I'm an architect, and I can't help but show you more pictures.

作为一名建筑师， 我还是想向大家展示更多图片。

So here are a few examples to illustrate

大家将看到一些

how intention has been expressed

我拜访过的社区，

in some of the communities I've visited.

也是这个意愿实体化的例子。

Through the careful selection of furniture,

通过精心挑选家具，

lighting and acoustic materials to support eating together;

照明及隔音材料，令聚餐体验更好；

in the careful visual location and visual access

通过精心设计的视觉效果，

to kids' play areas around and inside the common house;

来美化公共大厅及儿童娱乐区；

in the consideration of scale

通过对社区内部和周边

and distribution of social gathering nodes

社交聚集点规模和分布的考量，

in and around the community to support our daily lives,

为我们的日常生活提供支持，

all of these spaces help contribute to and elevate

所有这些空间都能够 帮助加强并且提高

the sense of communitas

各个社区内

in each community.

社区精神的意识。

What was that word? "Communitas."

就是这个词，”社区精神"。

Communitas is a fancy social science way of saying "spirit of community."

"社区精神" 是个高端的社科术语。

And in visiting over 80 different communities,

在我拜访了80多个社区后，

my measure of communitas became:

我是这样衡量社区意识的：

How frequently did residents eat together?

居民之间一起聚餐的频率。

While it's completely up to each group

当然，人们间隔多久一块儿吃一顿饭，

how frequently they have common meals,

在不同社区可能完全不同。

I know some that have eaten together every single night

我知道有些人40年以来

for the past 40 years.

每天晚上都一起用餐。

I know others

还有一些人，

that have an occasional potluck once or twice a month.

每个月会一起吃个一两次便饭。

And from my observations, I can tell you,

而据我观察，我可以告诉大家，

those that eat together more frequently,

经常一起吃饭的群体

exhibit higher levels of communitas.

通常具有更强烈的社区精神。

It turns out, when you eat together,

毕竟， 当人们一起吃饭的时候，

you start planning more activities together.

大家会共同计划更多的活动。

When you eat together, you share more things.

当你们一起吃饭的时候， 你们分享更多事物。

You start to watch each other's kids.

你们会开始照顾对方的小孩，

借用工具，甚至汽车。

You lend our your power tools. You borrow each other's cars.

And despite all this,

尽管如此，

as my daughter loves to say,

就像我女儿经常说的，

everything is not rainbows and unicorns in cohousing,

也不是所有事情都完美无瑕，

and I'm not best friends with every single person in my community.

我也并没有和社区内 所有人都成为密友。

We even have differences and conflicts.

分歧和矛盾当然也是存在的。

But living in cohousing, we're intentional about our relationships.

但是，在公共住宅里， 我们都很在乎彼此之间的关系。

We're motivated to resolve our differences.

我们有足够的动力去化解分歧。

We follow up, we check in,

大家会随时跟进、更新，

we speak our personal truths

我们会说出心里话

and, when appropriate,

并且在必要的时候，

we apologize.

我们会道歉。

Skeptics will say that cohousing is only interesting or attractive

持怀疑态度的人会说， 只有很少一部分人才会觉得

to a very small group of people.

公共住宅有吸引力。

And I'll agree with that.

这一点我同意。

If you look at Western cultures around the globe,

在全球的西方文化社会当中，

those living in cohousing are just a fractional percent.

只有非常小的一部分人 生活在共同住宅里。

But that needs to change,

但是我们需要改变，

because our very lives depend upon it.

因为这对我们的生活至关重要。

In 2015, Brigham Young University completed a study

杨百翰大学在2015年的 一项研究显示，

that showed a significant increase risk of premature death

生活在孤立隔绝环境中的人们

in those who were living in isolation.

过早死亡的风险显著增加。

The US Surgeon General has declared isolation

隔绝已经被美国公共卫生部列为

公共健康传染病。

to be a public health epidemic.

And this epidemic is not restricted to the US alone.

而这种瘟疫的蔓延已经不仅限于美国。

So when I said earlier

所以就像我之前所说，

that cohousing is an antidote to isolation,

公共住宅是对抗隔绝的解药。

what I should have said

事实上，我应该说

is that cohousing can save your life.

公共住宅是可以救命的。

If I was a doctor, I would tell you to take two aspirin,

如果我是一名医生， 我会建议你服用两颗阿司匹林，

and call me in the morning.

然后明天早上给我打电话。

But as an architect,

然而作为一名建筑师，

I'm going to suggest that you take a walk with your neighbor,

我会建议大家与 你们的邻居一起散散步，

share a meal together,

试试一块儿聚餐，

and call me in 20 years.

然后过二十年再打给我。

Thank you.

谢谢。

(Applause)

（掌声）