LZ Granderson: The myth of the gay agenda | TED

281,282 views ・ 2012-06-15

TED


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Translator: Jenny Zurawell Reviewer: Morton Bast
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When I was about 16 years old
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I can remember flipping through channels at home during summer vacation,
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looking for a movie to watch on HBO --
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and how many of you remember "Ferris Bueller's Day Off"?
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Oh yeah, great movie, right? -- Well, I saw Matthew Broderick on the screen, and so I thought,
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"Sweet! Ferris Bueller. I'll watch this!"
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It wasn't Ferris Bueller. And forgive me Matthew Broderick,
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I know you've done other movies besides Ferris Bueller, but that's how I remember you; you're Ferris.
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But you weren't doing Ferris-y things at the time; you were doing gay things at the time.
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He was in a movie called "Torch Song Trilogy."
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And "Torch Song Trilogy" was based on a play about this drag queen who essentially was looking for love.
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Love and respect -- that's what the whole film was about.
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And as I'm watching it, I'm realizing that they're talking about me.
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Not the drag queen part -- I am not shaving my hair for anyone -- but the gay part.
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The finding love and respect, the part about trying to find your place in the world.
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So as I'm watching this, I see this powerful scene that brought me to tears,
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and it stuck with me for the past 25 years.
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And there's this quote that the main character, Arnold, tells his mother
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as they're fighting about who he is and the life that he lives.
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"There's one thing more -- there's just one more thing you better understand.
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I've taught myself to sew, cook, fix plumbing, build furniture,
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I can even pat myself on the back when necessary,
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all so I don't have to ask anyone for anything.
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There's nothing I need from anyone except for love and respect,
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and anyone who can't give me those two things has no place in my life."
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I remember that scene like it was yesterday; I was 16, I was in tears, I was in the closet,
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and I'm looking at these two people, Ferris Bueller and some guy I'd never seen before,
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fighting for love.
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When I finally got to a place in my life
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where I came out and accepted who I was, and was really quite happy, to tell you the truth,
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I was happily gay and I guess that's supposed to be right because gay means happy too.
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I realized there were a lot of people who weren't as gay as I was --
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gay being happy, not gay being attracted to the same sex.
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In fact, I heard that there was a lot of hate and a lot of anger
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and a lot of frustration and a lot of fear
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about who I was and the gay lifestyle.
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Now, I'm sitting here trying to figure out "the gay lifestyle," "the gay lifestyle,"
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and I keep hearing this word over and over and over again: lifestyle, lifestyle, lifestyle.
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I've even heard politicians say that the gay lifestyle is a greater threat
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to civilization than terrorism.
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That's when I got scared.
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Because I'm thinking, if I'm gay and I'm doing something that's going to destroy civilization,
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I need to figure out what this stuff is, and I need to stop doing it right now.
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(Laughter)
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So, I took a look at my life, a hard look at my life,
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and I saw some things very disturbing.
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(Laughter)
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And I want to begin sharing these evil things that I've been doing with you,
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starting with my mornings.
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I drink coffee.
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Not only do I drink coffee, I know other gay people who drink coffee.
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I get stuck in traffic --
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evil, evil traffic.
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Sometimes I get stuck in lines at airports.
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I look around, and I go, "My God, look at all these gay people!
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We're all trapped in these lines! These long lines trying to get on an airplane!
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My God, this lifestyle that I'm living is so freaking evil!"
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I clean up. This is not an actual photograph of my son's room; his is messier.
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And because I have a 15-year-old, all I do is cook and cook and cook.
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Any parents out there of teenagers? All we do is cook for these people --
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they eat two, three, four dinners a night -- it's ridiculous!
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This is the gay lifestyle.
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And after I'm done cooking and cleaning and standing in line and getting stuck in traffic,
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my partner and I, we get together
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and we decide that we're gonna go and have some wild and crazy fun.
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(Laughter)
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We're usually in bed before we find out who's eliminated on "American Idol."
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We have to wake up and find out the next day who's still on
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because we're too freaking tired to hear who stays on.
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This is the super duper evil gay lifestyle.
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Run for your heterosexual lives, people.
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(Applause)
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When my partner, Steve, and I first started dating,
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he told me this story about penguins.
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And I didn't know where he was going with it at first.
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He was kind of a little bit nervous when he was sharing it with me, but he told me that
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when a penguin finds a mate that they want to spend the rest of their life with,
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they present them with a pebble -- the perfect pebble.
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And then he reaches into his pocket, and he brings this out to me.
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And I looked at it, and I was like, this is really cool.
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And he says, "I want to spend the rest of my life with you."
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So I wear this whenever I have to do something that makes me a little nervous,
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like, I don't know, a TEDx talk.
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I wear this when I am apart from him for a long period of time.
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And sometimes I just wear it just because.
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How many people out there are in love? Anyone in love out there?
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You might be gay.
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(Laughter)
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Because I, too, am in love, and apparently that's part of the gay lifestyle that I warned you about.
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(Applause)
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You may want to tell your spouse. Who, if they're in love, might be gay as well.
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How many of you are single? Any single people out there?
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You too might be gay! Because I know some gay people who are also single.
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It's really scary, this gay lifestyle thing; it's super duper evil and there's no end to it!
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It goes and goes and engulfs!
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It's really quite silly, isn't it?
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That's why I'm so happy to finally hear President Obama come out and say
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that he supports --
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(Applause)
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that he supports marriage equality.
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It's a wonderful day in our country's history; it's a wonderful day in the globe's history
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to be able to have an actual sitting president say, enough of this --
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first to himself, and then to the rest of the world.
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It's wonderful.
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But there's something that's been disturbing me since he
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made that remark just a short time ago.
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And that is, apparently, this is just another move by the gay activists
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that's on the gay agenda.
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And I'm disturbed by this because I've been openly gay now for quite some time.
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I've been to all of the functions, I've been to fundraisers,
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I've written about the topic, and I have yet to receive my copy of this gay agenda.
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(Laughter)
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I've paid my dues on time,
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(Laughter)
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I've marched in gay pride flags parades and the whole nine,
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and I've yet to see a copy of the gay agenda.
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It's very, very frustrating, and I was feeling left out, like I wasn't quite gay enough.
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But then something wonderful happened: I was out shopping, as I tend to do,
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and I came across a bootleg copy of the official gay agenda.
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And I said to myself, "LZ, for so long, you have been denied this.
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When you get in front of this crowd, you're gonna share the news.
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You're gonna spread the gay agenda so no one else has to wonder,
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what exactly is in the gay agenda?
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What are these gays up to?
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What do they want?"
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So, without further ado, I will present to you, ladies and gentlemen --
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now be careful, 'cause it's evil -- a copy,
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the official copy, of the gay agenda.
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(Music)
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The gay agenda, people!
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(Applause)
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There it is!
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Did you soak it all in? The gay agenda.
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Some of you may be calling it, what,
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the Constitution of the United States, is that what you call it too?
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The U.S. Constitution is the gay agenda.
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These gays, people like me, want to be treated like full citizens
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and it's all written down in plain sight.
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I was blown away when I saw it. I was like, wait, this is the gay agenda?
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Why didn't you just call it the Constitution so I knew what you were talking about?
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I wouldn't have been so confused; I wouldn't have been so upset.
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But there it is. The gay agenda.
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Run for your heterosexual lives.
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Did you know that in all the states where there is no shading that
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people who are gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered
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can be kicked out of their apartments
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for being gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered?
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That's the only reason that a landlord needs to have them removed,
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because there's no protection from discrimination of GLBT people.
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Did you know in the states where there's no shading that
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you can be fired for being gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered?
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Not based upon the quality of your work,
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how long you've been there, if you stink,
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just if you're gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered.
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All of which flies in the face of the gay agenda,
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also known as the U.S. Constitution.
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Specifically, this little amendment right here:
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"No state shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities
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of citizens of the United States."
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I'm looking at you, North Carolina.
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But you're not looking at the U.S. Constitution.
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This is the gay agenda: equality. Not special rights,
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but the rights that were already written by these people --
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these elitists, if you will.
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Educated, well-dressed,
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(Laughter)
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some would dare say questionably dressed.
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(Laughter)
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Nonetheless, our forefathers, right?
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The people that, we say, knew what they were doing when they wrote the Constitution --
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the gay agenda, if you will.
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All of that flies in the face of what they did.
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That is the reason why I felt it was imperative that
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I presented you with this copy of the gay agenda.
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Because I figured if I made it funny, you wouldn't be as threatened.
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I figured if I was a bit irreverent, you wouldn't find it serious.
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But when you see the map, and you see our state of Michigan --
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it's legal to fire someone
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for being gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered,
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that it's legal to remove someone from their home
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because they're gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered,
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then you realize that this whole conversation about marriage equality
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is not about stripping someone's rights away,
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it's about granting them the rights that [have] already been stated.
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And we're just trying to walk in those rights that have already been stated,
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that we've already agreed upon.
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There are people living in fear
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of losing their jobs
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so they don't show anyone who they really are
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right here at home. This isn't just about North Carolina;
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all those states that were clear, it's legal.
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If I could brag for a second,
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I have a 15-year-old son from my marriage.
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He has a 4.0.
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He is starting a new club at school, Policy Debate.
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He's a budding track star;
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he has almost every single record in middle school for every event that he competed in.
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He volunteers.
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He prays before he eats.
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I would like to think, as his father -- and he lives with me primarily --
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that I had a little something to do with all of that.
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I would like to think that he's a good boy,
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a respectful young man. I would like to think that
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I've proven to be a capable father.
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But if I were to go to the state of Michigan today,
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and try to adopt a young person who is in an orphanage,
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I would be disqualified for only one reason:
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because I'm gay.
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It doesn't matter what I've already proven, what I can do with my heart.
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It's because of what the state of Michigan says that I am
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that I am disqualified for any sort of adoption.
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And that's not just about me,
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that's about so many other Michiganders, U.S. citizens,
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who don't understand why what they are
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is so much more significant than who they are.
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This story just keeps playing over and over
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and over again in our country's history.
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There was a time in which, I don't know,
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people who were black couldn't have the same rights.
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People who happened to be women didn't have the same rights, couldn't vote.
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There was a point in our history in which, if you were considered disabled,
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that an employer could just fire you, before the Americans with Disabilities Act.
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We keep doing this over and over again.
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And so here we are, 2012,
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gay agenda,
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gay lifestyle, and I'm not a good dad
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and people don't deserve to be able to protect their families
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because of what they are, not who they are.
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So when you hear the words "gay lifestyle" and "gay agenda" in the future,
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I encourage you to do two things:
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One, remember the U.S. Constitution, and then two,
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if you wouldn't mind looking to your left, please.
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Look to your right.
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That person next to you is a brother, is a sister.
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And they should be treated with love and respect.
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Thank you.
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