Tracee Ellis Ross: A woman's fury holds lifetimes of wisdom | TED

譯者: Ziqing Ye 審譯者: Yanyan Hong

So, I have a friend.

那麼，我有一個朋友。

She's an actress, she's in her 60s.

她是一位演員，六十多歲。

She's super bright,

她很活潑，

badass,

是個倔脾氣，

emotionally intelligent.

在情感方面很有智慧。

And a couple of days before Christmas, she was at the post office.

而在聖誕節的幾天前，她在郵局。

It was really crowded, as it is around the holidays,

那裡很擁擠，因為正是假日時節，

and she was filling out some forms

而她正在填寫一些表格，

and she was really focused.

全神貫注。

And out of nowhere, someone moved her out of the way --

不知從哪裡冒出來一個人， 將她挪開了──

just physically put their hands on her and moved her out of the way.

真的把手放在她身上，將她移開了。

He apparently needed something that she was blocking,

他顯然需要一些被她擋住的東西，

so he moved her.

所以他移動了她。

Maybe he had said something to her, maybe he didn't, she didn't hear it ...

或許他對她說了一些話， 或許他沒有，她沒有聽到……

不管怎麼說，她正全神貫注， 填寫她的表格。

Either way, she was focused, she was filling out the form.

突然有隻手在她身上，

And the next thing you know, there were hands on her,

而她被挪開了。

and she was being moved out of the way.

He then got what he was reaching for,

他隨即拿到了他想拿的東西，

whatever she was blocking,

她擋住的那個東西，

and went on his merry way.

隨即繼續他的快樂之路。

She said that she was shocked at first --

她說，一開始她感到震驚──

yeah.

是啊。

And then a fury rose up in her that she could not explain:

然後她感受到一種憤怒， 連她自己都無法解釋：

not annoyance,

不是煩惱，

not frustration,

不是失望，

but "fury" was the word that she used.

而她用的詞是「憤怒」。

And she went on to say,

她接著說：

"I mean, I wanted to get physical.

「我的意思是，我想要肢體攻擊他。

I don't know -- I was furious.

我不知道──我很氣憤。

And I don't know why.

而我不知道為什麼。

I mean, he didn't hit me.

我是說，他沒有打我。

He didn't hurt me,

他沒有傷害我，

he didn't violate me.

他沒有冒犯我。

He moved me,

他移動了我，

and I wanted to hurt him,

而我想打他，

or at the very least,

或者至少，

run after him and yell in his face."

追著他跑然後對著 他的臉大喊大叫。」

So later, I was left pondering this fury,

所以之後，我在思考這個憤怒，

and looking for an explanation as to why, even in her telling of it,

並且嘗試著解釋為什麼， 即使在她的講述中，

I felt fury, too,

我也感受到憤怒，

and why this was a word and a feeling that I was hearing a lot about lately.

為什麼這是我最近經常聽到的 一個詞和一種感覺？

I feel like this is the point in the room

我感覺在這一刻的房間裡，

where all the men are getting a little bit uncomfortable.

所有的男人都感到有一點不舒服。

(Laughter)

（笑聲）

It's OK.

沒關係。

Stay with me.

忍耐一下。

This fury is something that I have been chomping on

這種憤怒是自 上次美國總統大選以來

since the last US presidential election.

我一直在嘮叨的事情。

And it seems that many women have.

而且似乎很多女性都有。

This fury was not my friend's alone.

並非只我的朋友一個人有這種憤怒。

Her fury was ignited

她的憤怒是被幾代以来

男性在未經同意的情況下 擅自操弄女性的身體

by lifetimes of men helping themselves to women's bodies

without consent.

而點燃的。

There's a culture of men helping themselves to women,

有一種男性擅自操弄女性的文化，

and in this case,

而在這個例子裡，

in a seemingly innocuous way,

以一種看似無害的方式，

where a woman's body is like a saltshaker:

一個女人的身體被當做一個鹽瓶：

"Get out of the way so I can get to the fries" --

「讓一下，這樣我就可以 拿到薯條了」──

(Laughter)

（笑聲）

to the most egregious,

到另一個極端、

violent

暴力

and horrific situations.

和可怕的情況。

I imagine that some of you are wondering what the connection is

我想你們中的一些人或許想知道

在無害和可怕之間的聯繫，

between the innocuous and the horrific,

two things that seem to be on opposite ends of the spectrum.

它們兩個看起來完全相反， 處在光譜的兩頭。

Well, the common thread is the spectrum.

那麼，共同的聯繫便是那個光譜。

The innocuous makes space for the horrific.

無害的舉動為更可怕的 舉動提供了空間。

And women have to live with the effects of both

而女人必須同時忍受這兩方面的影響

and everything in between.

以及在二者之間的一切。

Fellas,

朋友們，

can you imagine you're just on your phone,

能否想像一下，你正在看手機，

and someone walks up to you and just takes it out of your hand?

然後有個人向你走來， 直接從你手上把它拿走了？

And they're like, "OK dude, I don't know why you're getting so upset,

而他們說，「行了，老兄， 我不知道你為何這麼不高興，

I want to make a phone call.

我想打個電話，

I'm going to give it back to you as soon as I'm done.

一旦打完以後我會立即還給你。

隨你。」

Whatever."

And then imagine if someone takes that cell phone out of your hands --

然後想像一下 如果有人從你手中拿走手機，

I don't know -- once a day,

我不知道──每天一次，

twice a day,

每天兩次，

random times.

隨便幾次。

And the explanation is,

而他們給出的解釋是，

"Yeah, well, I mean, you got a fancy case,"

「是啊，嗯，我是說， 你的手機殼很獨特。」

or "You shouldn't have taken it out of your pocket,"

或者「你不應該 從口袋裡把它拿出來」，

or "Yep. Yeah.

或者「對。是的。

That's just the way it is."

事情就是那樣子的。」

But somehow, no one ever talks about the person who took the cell phone.

但不知何故，從來沒有人 談論過把手機拿走的人。

Overly simplified, I get it,

我明白，這是過度簡化，

but you see where I'm going.

但你們知道我在講什麼。

Men are so used to helping themselves, that it's like ...

男人太過習慣於「自便」，

就好像……

they can't help themselves.

他們控制不住自己似的。

And not because men are fundamentally less moral,

而這並不是因為男人天生更不道德，

but because this is a very big blind spot for most men.

而是因為，這是絕大多數 男人的一個盲點。

When someone helps themselves to a woman,

當一個人擅自決定對女人

動手動腳時，

it not only triggers discomfort and distress,

它不僅會引發不適和痛苦，

but the unspoken experiences of our mothers' lives,

還會帶出那些沒有說出口的經歷。

是我們母親的生活，姐妹的生活，

sisters' lives

and generations of women before us.

以及我們之前幾代的女人所經歷的。

That's lifetimes of women dealing with men

幾代以來的女人，在她們的一生中

都在與自以為比我們 更了解自己的男人打交道，

who assume they know better for us than we know for ourselves,

being the property of husbands,

作為丈夫的財產，

landowners,

地主的財產，

and having old, white men tell us the fate of our lady parts;

並且由老白人來告訴我們 身上器官的天命；

lifetimes of having our bodies used for love and objects of desire,

幾代人以來，我們的身體 被當作愛和欲望的物件，

instead of bodies that we get to wield and use as we choose;

而非我們自己 能夠選擇如何使用的身體。

lifetimes of knowing that whether we play by their rules or not,

幾代女人的一生中，

我們知道不管我們 是否遵守他們的規則，

we still have to tolerate harassment,

我們都仍然需要忍受騷擾、

assault

侵犯，

and even worse;

甚至更糟；

lifetimes of our bodies being used as property that can be hit and hurt,

幾輩子以來我們的身體被當做

能被擊打和傷害的財產，

manipulated and moved

被操縱和移動，

and like objects that are not deserving of respect;

就像不值得尊重的物件一樣；

lifetimes of not being able to express the anger of our bodies.

幾輩子以來，

我們無法表達出我們身體的氣憤。

It's no wonder we feel this fury.

難怪我們會感到這種憤怒。

And if you add in the history of race --

而如果你加上種族的歷史──

which is a whole other talk --

這是另一個完整的話題──

it gets exponentially more complicated.

事情的複雜性會指數性增長。

When women get manhandled, we start to rationalize,

當女人被男人擺佈時， 我們會理性分析，

try to figure out the ways that it was --

嘗試著找出到底發生了什麼──

"It was probably our fault.

「或許是我們的錯。」

You know what? He probably said something, and I didn't hear him.

「你知道嗎？他可能說過什麼， 不過我沒有聽見。」

「我只是反應過度了。」

I'm just overreacting.

I'm totally overreacting."

「我完全就是反應過度了。」

No.

不。

No.

不。

No.

不。

No, no, no, no, no.

不，不，不，不，不。

Women have been trained to think that we are overreacting

女性一直在被訓練著 去認為自己是反應過激，大驚小怪，

or that we're being too sensitive or unreasonable.

或者我們太過敏感，毫不講理。

We try to make sense of nonsense,

我們試圖找出毫無意義之事的意義，

and we swallow the furious feelings.

而我們吞嚥下這些憤怒的感受。

We try to put them into some hidden place in our minds,

我們嘗試著將它們放進 我們腦海中的隱藏空間，

but they don't go away.

但它們並沒有離開。

That fury sits deep inside as we practice our smiles --

那憤怒藏在內心深處， 當我們練習微笑的時候──

(Giggling) "Yes, of course" --

（笑聲）「是的，當然」──

and try to be pleasant.

並試著變得討人喜歡；

"I know --" (Giggling) "Yes, yes, of course,"

「我知道──」（笑聲） 「是的，是的，當然。」

because apparently, women aren't supposed to get angry.

因為很明顯，女人不應該生氣。

That fury that my friend felt holds centuries

我的朋友感受到的那憤怒， 包含了幾個世紀以來的

of never being able to directly address or express our indignation,

無法直接說出或表達我們的憤慨，

our frustration

我們的不滿，

and our rage.

和我們的憤怒。

When someone thinks they can help themselves to our bodies,

當某個人認為他們可以 隨自己的意思擺弄我們的身體時，

it not only ignites the current fury,

這不僅點燃了我們現在的怒火，

but it lights up the past.

也點燃了過去。

What seems like a benign moment at the post office

在郵局看似無害的一刻，

is actually an anger grenade.

實際上是一顆憤怒的手榴彈。

Well,

好吧，

kaboom!

砰！

Today, the global collection of women's experiences

今天，全球女性的經歷

can no longer be ignored.

再也不能被忽視了。

Time's up on thinking that we're overreacting

認為我們反應過度 或「事情就是這樣」的

or "This is just the way it is."

時代已經結束了。

Time's up on women being held responsible

女性要為男性的不良行為負責的時代

for men's bad behavior.

已經結束了。

It is men's responsibility to change men's bad behavior.

改變男性的壞行為是男人的責任。

(Applause)

（掌聲）

Our culture is shifting,

我們的文化在改變，

and it's time.

而這就是時候。

So my fellow women

所以，我的女性夥伴們，

and our gentle men,

和我們的男士們，

as we are here together within this particular window

當我們在這個 特殊的窗口中聚在一起，

of this large-scale movement towards women's equality,

在這一大規模的女性平等運動中，

and as we envision a future that does not yet exist,

以及當我們展望一個 尚不存在的未來時，

we both have different invitations.

我們都收到不同的邀請函。

Men,

男士們，

I call you in as allies,

我請求你們加入成為盟友，

as we work together towards change.

讓我們共同努力實現變革。

May you be accountable and self-reflective,

願你有責任感並會自我反省，

compassionate and open.

富有同情心，並心胸開闊。

May you ask how you can support a woman and be of service to change.

希望你可以問問 如何才能支持一個女人，

並且願意為改變而幫助，

And may you get help if you need it.

如果你需要幫助， 希望你能夠得到幫助。

And women,

而女士們，

I encourage you

我鼓勵你們

to acknowledge your fury.

承認你們的憤怒。

Give it language.

用語言表達它。

Share it in safe places of identification

在安全的地方，用安全的方法

and in safe ways.

將它分享出來。

Your fury is not something to be afraid of.

你的憤怒並不是什麼 值得害怕的東西。

It holds lifetimes of wisdom.

它承載了幾輩人的智慧反思。

Let it breathe

讓它自由呼吸，

and listen.

並且用心聽著。

Thank you.

謝謝。

(Applause)

（掌聲）

Thank you.

謝謝。

(Applause)

（掌聲）