A queer vision of love and marriage | Tiq Milan and Kim Katrin Milan

翻译人员: Junyi Sha 校对人员: Danica Shi

Tiq Milan: Our first conversation was on Facebook,

列･米兰（TM）：我们的 第一次对话是在Facebook，

and it was three days long.

那长达三天之久。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

我们之间分享了超过3000条讯息，

We shared over 3,000 messages between us,

and it was during those 72 hours that I knew she was going to be my wife.

在那72小时里，我就知道了 她将成为我的妻子。

我们没有为我们的恋爱 等待那些建议的时间；

We didn't wait any prerequisite amount of time for our courtship;

we told each other the vulnerable truths up front:

我们事先就告诉了彼此 那脆弱的真相：

我是一名变性男性，

I am a transgender man,

which means the F on my birth certificate should have stood for "False,"

意思就是我出生证上的字母F， 应该代表单词“错误的”，

instead of "Female."

而非“女性”。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

Walking around as a woman in the world

在这个世界上 以女性的身份走来走去

felt like walking with pebbles in my shoes.

感觉就像是鞋里的鹅卵石杠着脚。

它使我无法昂首阔步，

It took the rhythm out of my swagger,

it threw me off balance,

它使我失去平衡，

it pained me with every step I took forward.

它让我的每一步前行都感到疼痛。

But today I'm a man of my own intention;

但今天，我自愿成为男性；

a man of my own design.

我设计了自己。

Kim Katrin Milan: I am a cisgender queer woman.

吉姆･凯特林･米兰（KKM）： 我是一名顺性别的性别认同疑惑女性。

顺性别的意思是 我出生时是一名女性

Cisgender means the gender I was assigned at birth

is still and has always been female.

现在，一直以来都还是女性。

This doesn't make me natural or normal,

但并不因此我就变得自然或正常，

这只是用于描述 我们在这个世界上存在的

this is just one way of describing the many different ways

各种形态中的一种。

that we exist in this world.

queer是一个文化术语， （可以表示古怪的，或是俚语同性恋）

And queer is a cultural term,

但是在这种语境中，

but in this case,

it refers to the way that I'm not restricted by gender

是指我并不严格受到我的性别限制

when it comes to choosing partners.

去选择我的另一半。

I've identified in a few different ways --

我找到了一些不同的方式来描述—

as a bisexual, as a lesbian --

—作为一名双性恋，一名女同性恋—

but for me,

—但是对于我来说，

queerness encompasses all of the layers of who I am and how I've loved.

性别认同疑惑这个词包括了 我的全部，还有我爱的方式。

I'm layers, and not fractions.

我是多层的，而不是分裂的。

And for me,

对我来说，

the fact that he was queer

他也是性别认同疑惑者的事实

meant that I could trust his courtship from the very beginning.

意味着我从一开始 就能够信任他对我的爱。

作为同性恋和跨性别人群，

As queer and trans people,

we're so often excluded from institutions and traditions.

我们是如此经常的 被制度和传统拒之门外。

We create spaces outside of convention,

我们在传统之外创建了新空间，

including the conventions of time.

也突破了包括时间的传统。

And in those 3,000 messages between us,

在我们之间的那3000条信息，

we collapsed time;

我们使时间崩塌；

we queered it;

我们毁坏了它；

we laid it all on the table.

我们把它全部放在了台面上。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

With no pretense at all.

没有任何的虚假。

And this meant that we were able to commit to each other

这就意味着我们可以 用截然不同的方式

in a profoundly different way.

对彼此做出承诺。

So often what we're told is this idea of the "Golden Rule,"

我们经常被告知那个“黄金条约”，

that we should treat other people the way we want to be treated.

就是己所不欲，勿施于人。

但是问题是，

But the problem with that

is that it assumes that we are the standard for other people,

这是建立在我们作为他人 的标准的假想之上的，

and we're not.

但我们并不是。

We need to treat other people the way they want to be treated,

“己所不欲，勿施于人”的 意思是我们

which means we had to ask.

要张口询问别人要什么。

I couldn't assume that the kind of love that Tiq needed

我不能保证我所想要的那种爱

was the same kind of love that I needed.

和列想要的是同一种。

So I asked him everything -- about his fears, his insecurities --

所以我就问他所有的一切 －关于他的担忧，不安全感－

我们从那里开始。

and we started from there.

TM: I didn't know what kind of love I needed.

TM：我不知道我想要什么样的爱。

I had just come out of a year-long fog

我刚刚走出长达一年的灰暗期，

of being rejected and utterly depleted.

在其中，我被排斥，被彻底删除。

I had someone look me in my eyes

有些人看着我的眼睛，

and tell me that I was unworthy of their love because I was trans.

告诉我，我不值得他们的爱， 因为我是跨性别人群。

And there's a culture of lovelessness

我们创造了跨性别人群身边的

that we've created around transgender people.

爱的文化。

It's reasoned, justified and often signed into law.

这是合理的，正当的， 被法律认可的。

And I was a heartbeat away from internalizing that message,

我差一点点就认同了那些信息——

that I wasn't worthy.

我不值得。

But Kim said that I was her ideal --

但吉姆说我是她的理想型——

即使是我心碎是的糟糕样子。

the heartbroken mess that I was.

(Laughter)

（笑声）

KKM: He totally was my ideal.

KKM：他完全是我的理想型。

（笑声）

(Laughter)

在很多方面都是这样。

In more ways than one.

Both poets, writers, creatives

我们都是诗人，作家，创想者

with a long history of community work behind us,

参加过很长时间的社区工作，

and big, huge dreams of a family in front of us,

在我们面前还有家庭的大梦想，

we shared a lot of things in common,

我们有很多共同点，

but we were also incredibly different.

但是我们又非常不同。

I've been a lifelong traveler and a bit of an orphan,

我一生都在旅行， 从某种程度来说也算是孤儿，

whereas he comes from a huge family,

而他则来自一个巨大的家庭，

and definitely stays grounded.

过着绝对安定的生活。

I often kind of sum up the differences in our strengths

我经常把我们之间的优势差异

by saying, "Keep me safe,

总结为，“你给我安定，

and I'll keep you wild."

我给你放纵自由。”

(Laughter)

（笑声）

TM: We have marginalized identities but we don't live marginalized lives.

TM：我们虽然有着边缘化的身份， 但我们并不是边缘化地生活着。

作为性别认同疑惑，跨性别人群， 我们创造了新的生存方式。

Being queer and trans is about creating new ways of existing.

It's about loving people as they are,

爱一个人要爱这个人本身，

not as they're supposed to be.

而不是爱他应该被赋定的价值。

Kim is unapologetically feminine

在这个往往对

in a world that is often cruel and violent

那些太过自信或放纵的女性

to women who are too proud and too freeing.

往往残酷暴力的世界里， 吉姆是充满女人味的。

And I didn't enter into this union

和她在一起，

under the auspices that she was going to be my helper or my rib,

我没有把她当作我的帮手， 或是我的附属，

but a fully complex --

她是一个复杂的个体。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

KKM: Right? That's not right.

KKM：对吗？那是不对的。

TM：是一个完全复杂的人

TM: But a fully complex human being

whose femininity wasn't for me to rein in, control or critique.

而不是一个让我去统治， 控制或是批判的女性。

It's her brilliance,

和她在一起，是因为她的聪明才智，

the way she leads with compassion,

她发挥同情心的方式，

and how she never loses sight of her empathy.

她一直以来坚守的那份同情心。

She has been my hero since day one.

她从第一天起就变为了我的英雄。

(Applause)

（掌声）

KKM: Our relationship has always been about setting each other free.

KKM：在我们的关系中，我们 一直都给予彼此自由。

One of the first questions I asked him

我首先问他的那些问题中

was what dreams he had left to accomplish,

有一个就是有没有什么 没有完成的梦想，

and how would I help him get there.

我可以怎样帮助他完成。

His dreams to live as a poet,

他的梦想是以一名诗人的身份生活，

to adopt and raise a family together,

收养孩子，养活一个家庭

to live a life that he was proud of,

过一个他自己感到骄傲的人生

and one that would live up to his mother's incredible legacy.

做一个不辜负母亲庞大遗产的人。

And I really appreciated that we were able to start from that place,

我很开心我们能够 从那个角度开始对话，

and not from a place that was around figuring out

而尝试找到一个角度

how to make each other work together.

让我们能相互接受。

And I think this really allowed us to grow into the people that we were

我认为这让我们变成了 我们现在这样

in a way that was incredibly different.

以一种完全不同的方式。

I love him whole;

我全身心地爱他；

pre-transition, now and in the future.

变性前，现在还有将来。

And it's this love that had us committed to each other

是这样一份爱让我们忠于彼此

before we'd even seen each other's faces.

即使是在看见彼此相貌之前。

TM: My mother's biggest concern when I transitioned

TM：当我变性时， 我母亲最担心的，

was who was going to love me as I am.

就是谁会爱这样一个我。

Had being transgender somehow precluded me from love and monogamy

变性的经历好像让我 被爱和夫妻制拒之门外，

because I was supposedly born in the wrong body?

仅仅因为我 出生在了错误的身体里吗？

But it's this type of structuring that has to be reframed

这种体制必须被修正，

in order to let love in.

让爱能够进入其中。

My body never betrayed me,

我的身体从来没有背叛过我，

and my body was never wrong.

我的身体也没有任何错误。

It's this restrictive, binary thinking on gender

是这种严格限制的性别二元思想

that said that I didn't exist.

说这样的我不存在。

But when we met,

但是当我们见面时，

she loved me for exactly how I showed up.

她爱我，爱我存在的方式。

她用手指去追寻我最近手术

She would trace her fingers along the numb keloid scars

留下的瘢痕。

left by my top surgery.

Scars that run from the middle of my chest all the way out to my outer torso.

从胸部中间一直延续到外躯干的伤疤。

She said that these were reminders of my strength

她说这些是我的力量，

and everything that I went through

我经历过的一切的见证，

and nothing for me to be ashamed of.

我不必为此感到耻辱。

So sprinting towards her hand in marriage

所以以短跑冲刺的速度向她求婚，

was the queerest thing that I could do.

是我做过的最奇怪的事。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

It flew in the face of more conventional trajectories

但是当我们面对爱情与婚姻

of love and relationships,

的传统轨道，

because God was never supposed to bless a union for folks like us,

因为上帝从来就不应该给 像我们这样的人们爱的祝福，

and the law was never supposed to recognize it.

法律也从不应该去认可它。

KKM: So on May 5, 2014,

KKM：所以在2014年5月5号，

在网上认识三个月之后，

just about three months after meeting online,

我们在曼哈顿 市政厅的台阶上结婚了，

we were married on the steps of City Hall in Manhattan,

and it was beautiful in every conceivable way.

从各个方面来看都十分美好。

It's safe to say that we reimagined some traditions,

保守的说，我们重构了一些传统，

但是我们也保留了 一些老的，我们适用的，

but we also kept some old ones that we worked in,

and we created something that worked for us.

我们创造了让我们 能彼此接受的方式

我的花束和胸花都是 用布鲁克林的野花填补的－

My bouquet and corsage was actually filled with wildflowers from Brooklyn --

also added in a little bit of lavender and sage to keep us grounded

还加上了一点点薰衣草 和鼠尾草让我们保持平定

because we were so nervous.

因为我们太紧张了。

And it was put together by a sweet sister healer friend of ours.

这一切都是由我们 可爱的姐妹医生朋友操办的。

I never wanted a diamond ring,

我从来都不想要一枚钻戒，

because conflict and convention are not my thing,

因为冲突和传统不是我的风格，

so my ring is the deepest purple,

我的戒指是暗紫色的，

like the color of my crown chakra,

就像我的皇冠脉轮的颜色，

and set in place with my birthstones.

然后在中间镶上我的出生石。

我的身世也是一份选择的礼物。

The gift of queerness is options.

I never had to choose his last name,

我不必去选择他的姓氏，

it was never an exception,

这本是没有例外的事，

but I did because I am my father's bastard child,

但是我有的原因是 我是父亲的私生子

someone who has always been an apology, a secret, an imposition.

我就是一个充满歉意的， 秘密的，强加的存在。

And it was incredibly freeing

能够去选择第一次 选择了我的男人的名字

to choose the name of a man who chose me first.

那种感觉是难以置信的放飞。

(Applause)

（掌声）

TM: So we told some family and some close friends,

TM：所以当我们告诉家人和朋友，

many of whom were still in disbelief as we took our vows.

他们中的许多 都难以置信我们宣了誓。

确切的说，我们把结婚照 都放在了Facebook上，

Fittingly, we posted all of our wedding photos on Facebook,

就是我们第一次相遇的地方——

where we met --

and Instagram, of course.

当然，还有Instagram。

And we quickly realized

然后，我们很快意识到

that our coming together was more than just a union of two people,

我们在一起不仅仅是两个人的结合，

but was a model of possibility for the millions of LGBTQ folks

而是给那些被贩售了谎言—— 家庭和婚姻

who have been sold this lie

与他们天生对立——

that family and matrimony is antithetical to who they are --

的同性恋，双性恋， 和跨性别人群树立了一种可能性，

for those of us who rarely get to see ourselves

给那些很少能在爱与幸福的瞬间里

reflected in love and happiness.

看到自己身影的人们树立了可能性。

KKM: And the thing is,

KKM：事实上，

absolutely we are marginalized because of our identities,

我们被边缘化 当然是因为我们的身份，

but it also emboldens us to be the people that we are.

但这也使我们 有胆量去展现真实的自我。

对性别认同感到疑惑是我们的钥匙；

Queerness is our major key;

blackness is our magic.

黑暗是我们的魔法。

It's because of these things

是因为这些东西，

that we are able to be hopeful, open, receptive and shape-shifting.

我们才能够变得充满希望， 开放，善于接纳，和转换形态。

These are the things that give us,

是这些东西让我们成为了自己，

and are such an incredible source of, our strength.

是我们神奇的力量之源。

我们的性别认同疑惑 就是力量的源泉。

Our queerness is a source of that strength.

I think of the words of Ottawa-based poet Brandon Wint:

我想起了渥太华诗人 布兰登･温特的话：

“性别认同疑惑不仅仅是同性恋， 而是一种好似被逃避的定义。

"Not queer like gay; queer like escaping definition.

Queer like some sort of fluidity and limitlessness all at once.

性别认同疑惑是一种 瞬间的流动性，无拘束感。

Queer like a freedom too strange to be conquered.

性别认同疑惑是一种 无法抗拒的自由力量

Queer like the fearlessness to imagine what love can look like,

性别认同疑惑 是敢于去想象爱的境界，

并去追逐它的无畏精神。”

and to pursue it."

TM：我们都是群体中的一部分－

TM: We are part of a community of folks --

Yeah, that's good right?

是吧，这是一件不错的事？

(Laughter)

（笑声）

We are part of a community of folks who are living their authentic selves

我们是这样的群体中的一员， 我们在性别线谱的任何位置，

all along the gender spectrum,

活出真实的自己。

despite the ubiquitous threat of violence,

不管那些无处不在的暴力胁迫，

despite the undercurrent of anxiety that always is present

不管那些总是为 以自我方式生活的人们

for people who live on their own terms.

而存在的焦虑暗流。

Globally, a transgender person is murdered every 21 hours.

从世界范围来说，每21个小时 就会有一名跨性别人士被谋杀。

而美国今年记录在案的 跨性别人群谋杀案

And the United States has had more trans murders on record this year

than any year to date.

达到历年最高值。

However, our stories are much more than this rigid dichotomy

然而，我们的故事 远不只是这种力量与柔韧

of strength and resilience.

的严格二分法。

We are expanding the human complexity on these margins,

我们在这些边缘位置 扩充人类的复杂性，

and we are creating freedom on these margins.

我们在这些边缘位置创造自由。

KKM: And we don't have any blueprints.

KKM：我们没有所谓的蓝图。

We're creating a world that we have literally never seen before;

我们正在创造一个 我们从未见过的世界；

organizing families based on love and not by blood,

用爱，而不是鲜血去组建家庭，

用很少有人能够展现的 那种同情心做为引导。

guiding by a compassion that so few of us have been shown ourselves.

So many of us have not received love from our families --

我们中的很多人都没有 能够从家庭中得到爱——

have been betrayed by the people that we trust most.

被我们最信任的人所背叛。

So what we do here is we create entirely new languages of love.

所以我们现在做的， 就是为爱创造一种新语言。

Ones that are about creating the space for us to be our authentic selves

是为我们真实的自我去创造空间，

and not imposing this standard

而不是将男性与女性应该如何

of what masculinity or femininity is supposed to be.

的标准强加于大众。

TM: We are interested in love and inclusion

TM：我们是想要把爱和包容

作为革命性变革的工具，对吧？

as a tool of revolutionary change, right?

想法其实很简单，

And the idea is simply,

if we drop all our preconceived notions

我们只要抛弃对于某人

about how somebody is supposed to be --

应该如何的先入为主的观念——

他们的身体，他们的性别， 他们的肤色——

in their body, in their gender, in their skin --

if we take the intentional steps to unlearn these deep-seated biases

如果我们有意愿的去抛弃 这些根深蒂固的偏见，

and create space for people to be self-determined,

为那些自我意志的人创造空间，

and embrace who they are,

接受他们真实的自己，

then we will definitely create a better world than the one we were born into.

我们就一定会创造一个 比我们出生时的更好的世界。

(Applause)

（掌声）

KKM: We want to mark this time in history

KKM：我们想在这里留下 存在过的印记，

by leaving evidence of the fact that we were here.

去纪念这个历史的时刻。

我们为我们的关系打开了一扇窗户

We open up little windows into our relationship

让我们的群体去见证，

for our community to bear witness,

and we do this because we want to make maps to the future

我们这样做是为了给未来描绘图景，

and not monuments to ourselves.

而不是为了给自己建碑。

Our experience does not invalidate other peoples' experience,

我们的经历并不能否定其他人的经验，

but it should and necessarily does complicate this idea

但它应该，也必定会将爱

of what love and marriage are supposed to be.

与婚姻的观念复杂化。

TM: OK, now for all the talking,

TM：好的，我们现在说了这么多，

and inspiring,

做了这么多起人深思的事，

建立了可能性的结构，

and possibility-modeling we've done,

we've been nowhere near perfect.

但是我们离完美还很远。

And we've had to hold a mirror up to ourselves.

我们必须给自己竖一面镜子。

And I saw that I wasn't always the best listener,

我预见到了， 我并不总是最好的听众，

我的自我性也可能 阻碍我们夫妇的进步。

and that my ego got in the way of our progress as a couple.

And I've had to really assess these deep-seated, sexist ideas

我必须要去真正评估那些作为女性

that I've had about the value of a woman's experience in the world.

生活在这个世界上的 深层次的，性别观念。

I've had to reevaluate what it means to be in allyship with my wife.

我必须要重审与我妻子结婚的意义。

KKM: And I had to remind myself of a lot of things, too.

KKM：我也需要提醒我自己很多事情。

What it means to be hard on the issues,

什么才是真正的坚定办事，

but soft on the person.

宽容待人。

While we were writing this, we got into a massive fight.

当我们在撰写这次演讲稿时， 我们发生了激烈的争辩。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

For so many different reasons,

因为这么多不同的原因，

but based on the content about our values and our lived experiences --

但是基于我们的价值观 和我们的生活经历——

我们真的伤到了彼此，你们知道吗？

and we were really hurt, you know?

Because what we do and how we love puts ourselves entirely on the line.

因为我们把所做的，我们爱的方式 投放在了极大的风险里。

But even though the fight lasted over the course of two days --

但是即使这场战斗持续了两天之久——

(Laughter)

（笑声）

We were able to come back together to each other,

我们还是回到了彼此身边，

我们忠于自己，忠于彼此， 忠于我们的婚姻。

and recommit to ourselves, to each other and to our marriage.

And that really yielded some of the most passionate parts

这带来了我们今天想在这里 和你们分享的

最具激情的部分。

of what we share with you here today.

TM: I have had to interrogate masculinity,

TM：我必须要询问关于男子气概，

which I think doesn't happen enough.

我认为这还不足够。

I've had to interrogate masculinity;

我必须要询问关于男子气概；

这种伴随男性本质而来的 剧毒特权并不能定义我，

the toxic privileges that come with being a man don't define me,

but I have to be accountable for how it shows up in my life every day.

但是我必须要对每天出现在 我生活中的男子气概负责。

I have allowed my wife to do all of the emotional labor

我让我的妻子去从事 打开情感信号通路的工作

of prying open the lines of communication when I'd rather clam up and run away.

那种时刻，我宁愿选择沉默或是逃脱。

（笑声）

(Laughter)

I've stripped away emotional support instead of facing my own vulnerabilities,

我揭去了感情支持， 而不是面对自己的脆弱心灵，

particularly around the heartbreaking miscarriage we suffered last year,

特别是去年 遭遇到心碎的流产之后，

我对此深感歉意。

and I'm sorry for that.

Sometimes as men, we get to take the easy way out.

有时候，作为一个男人， 我们总想简单摆脱。

And so my journey as a trans person is about reimagining masculinity.

所以我跨性别的经历，也是 对男性特质的重新思考。

About creating a manhood that isn't measured

关于创造一种不是由权力，

by the power it wields, by the entitlements afforded to it,

它被赋予的权利，或是各种

or any simulacrum of control that it can muster,

意义上的控制力所测定的，

but works in tandem with femininity,

而是由与女性柔情的协调，

and is guided by my spirit.

被个人精神所指引的。

KKM: Y'all ...

KKM：嗯……

（掌声）

(Applause)

这也为我创造了空间， 以一种从未经历过的方式

And this has created the space for my femininity to flourish

in a way I had never experienced before.

使我的女性特质蓬勃发展。

他从不会被我的性别取向所威胁，

He never is threatened by my sexuality,

he never polices what I wear or how I act.

他也从不限制我的穿着或是行为。

I cook but he does way more of the cleaning than I do.

我烧饭，但是他比我 做更多的清洁工作。

And when we're rushing to get out of the house

当我们急着要出门的时候，

我们会有很多要做的东西，

and we have so much to handle,

he handles everything,

他会处理好一切，

so I have time to do my hair and makeup.

这样我就有时间去打扮头发，化妆。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

He understands that this is my armor,

他明白这是我的武器，

and he never treats femininity as though it is frivolous or superficial,

他从不把女性特质作为肤浅的， 表面的东西对待，

and this, and him --

而这，还有他——

他每天都帮我增长了对于性别的认知。

he grows my experience of gender every single day.

TM: I love to watch her get dressed in the morning.

TM：我喜欢在清晨欣赏她穿衣。

Watching her in the closet,

看着她在壁橱里，

looking for something comfortable and colorful, and tight,

搜寻一些舒适的， 色彩斑斓的，贴身的，

安全感的衣物——

and safe --

(Laughter)

（笑声）

但是观看她如何与自我斗争， 去寻找那种不醒目，

But it's challenging to watch her negotiate her decisions

looking for something that's going to get the least amount of attention,

但又要同时表现出 她是一名充满活力的

but at the same time be an expression of the vibrant and sexy woman she is.

性感的女性的衣服， 是一件颇具挑战性的事。

而我想做的只是去祝贺她的美丽，

And all I want to do is celebrate her for her beauty,

and the things that make her beautiful and special and free,

那些让她变得美丽， 特别，自由的东西，

from her long acrylic nails,

从她那长长的塑料指甲，

to her uncompromising black feminism.

到她那毫不妥协的黑人女性特质。

(Applause)

（掌声）

KKM: I love you. TM: I love you.

KKM：我爱你。 TM：我爱你。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

KKM: There are so many queer and trans people

KKM：在我们之前，还有那么多的

性别认同疑惑者和跨性别人群，

who have come before us,

whose stories we will never get to hear.

我们却没有机会去听见他们的故事。

We constantly experience this retelling of history

我们不断地看到像我们这样的人群

where we are conspicuously left out.

被排除在外。

And it's really hard to not see ourselves there.

但是想忽略我们自身真的很难。

And so living out loud for us is about that representation.

所以，我们大声活出自我 就是一种体现。

It's about having possibility models,

这是关于我们可能性的模型，

关于爱能够成为 我们这个世界的遗产的期望。

and having hope that love is part of our inheritance in this world, too.

TM: The possibility that we are practicing

TM:我们正在塑造的这种可能性，

is about reinventing time, love and institutions.

是关于重新定义时间，爱和制度的。

我们正在创造一个多样性的未来。

We are creating a future of multiplicity.

We are expanding the spectrum of gender and sexuality,

我们正在扩大性别和性取向的线谱，

imagining ourselves into existence,

想象我们自身存在的可能，

想象一个性别是由自身决定的， 而非被强加的世界，

imagining a world where gender is self-determined and not imposed,

and where who we are is a kaleidoscope of possibility

想象一个不受伪装成科学 或正义的狭隘观念限制的

without the narrow-minded limitations masquerading as science or justice.

我们能成为万千种可能性的世界。

(Applause)

（掌声）

KKM: And I can't lie:

KKM：我不能说谎；

it is really, really hard.

因为那真的，真的很难。

It is hard to stand in the face of bigotry

我很难站在偏执的眼前，

with an open heart and a smile on my face.

携着开放的心和满脸的微笑。

It is really hard to face the injustice that exists in the world,

要一边直面着存在 在这个世界上的不公平，

一边能够坚信人们能够 改变的能力，真的很难。

while still believing in the ability of people to really change.

That takes an enormous amount of faith and dedication.

这将花费巨大的信仰与执念。

除此之外，

And beyond that,

marriage is hard work.

婚姻也是很困难的事。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

Piles of dirty socks on the floor,

在地板上成堆的脏袜子，

more boring sports shows than I ever thought possible --

远超过想象的无聊体育节目——

（笑声）

(Laughter)

And fights that bring me to tears

那些使我流泪的争辩

when it feels like we're not speaking the same language.

有时让我感到我们根本 就是鸡同鸭讲。

But there is not a day that goes by

但是，在过去的每一天里，

where I am not so grateful to be married to this man;

我都为嫁给了这个男人而感激；

where I'm not so grateful for the possibility of changing minds,

我都为能够有机会改变观念，

and rewarding conversations,

做有价值的谈话，

and creating a world where love belongs to us all.

创造一个爱属于我们的世界而感激。

I think about our acronym:

我想了一下形容我们的 首字母缩写简称：

LGBTQ2SIA

LGBTQ2SIA.

一个看似无止境的 自我与群体的演化，

A seemingly endless evolution of self and a community,

but also this really deep desire not to leave anyone behind.

但同时也是不想 留下任何人的深深的期望。

We've learned how to love each other,

我们学习了如何爱彼此，

and we've committed to loving each other throughout changes to gender

我们学会了在经历 性别转变，精神改变的过程中，

and changes in spirit.

忠于彼此的爱。

And we learned this love in our chat rooms,

我们在聊天室里，俱乐部里，

in our clubs, in our bars and in our community centers.

酒吧里，社区中心里学到了这份爱。

We've learned how to love each other for the long haul.

我们学会了如何一直爱着彼此。

TM & KKM: Thank you.

TM&KKM：谢谢。

（掌声）

(Applause)