How work kept me going during my cancer treatment | Sarah Donnelly

譯者: Lilian Chiu 審譯者: Yanyan Hong

It was June 2014.

2014 年 6 月，

I was 30 years old,

我 30 歲，

and I received a call from my doctor's office

我的醫生的辦公室打了通電話給我，

to say my test results were in.

說我的檢驗結果出來了。

So I walked up to see her in my lunch break, and my doctor said

所以，我在午休時間 去找我的醫生，她說

she was very sorry to tell me that I had breast cancer.

她非常遺憾要告訴我，我得了乳癌。

I didn't want to believe her and at first, I didn't.

我不想相信她， 一開始，我的確不相信。

You see, I'm a lawyer and I needed some evidence.

要知道，我是個律師，我需要證據。

So I'm very embarrassed to tell you all

所以，我非常不好意思地告訴各位，

that I stood up and I walked around to where she was sitting

我站起來，繞到她坐的地方後面，

so that I could look over her shoulder and verify

這樣我才能從她肩上看到並確認

what was written on the page in front of her.

她面前的那張紙上寫了什麼。

(Laughter)

（笑聲）

Malignant carcinoma.

惡性腫瘤。

But still not wanting to believe it, I said,

但我還是不願相信，我說：

"Now, malignant carcinoma, you're sure that means cancer?"

「惡性腫瘤，你確定 它的意思就是癌症嗎？」

(Laughter)

（笑聲）

She told me she was sure.

她告訴我，她很肯定。

Back at work, I handed over the urgent things that needed to be done

回到工作上，我把 需要處理的急事都交付出去，

while I was having more tests to see if my cancer had spread.

同時我接受更多檢測， 看我的癌症是否有擴散。

But at that moment, work wasn't my priority.

但在那時刻， 工作不是我的第一要務。

I was thinking about how I was going to tell my family and friends

我在想的是，我要如何 告訴我的家人和朋友

that I had cancer.

我得了癌症。

How I was going to answer their questions

他們可能會問我一些問題，

about how bad it was and whether I was going to be OK,

比如狀況有多糟，我是否會沒事，

而我都不知道答案，要如何回答？

when I didn't know that myself.

I was wondering if my partner and I

我在納悶，我的另一半和我

would ever have an opportunity to start a family.

是否會有機會成家。

And I was figuring out how I was going to tell my mother,

我在想著，我要如何告訴我媽媽，

who had herself had breast cancer when she was pregnant with me.

她自己在懷我的時候也得了乳癌。

She would know how I was feeling

她會懂我的感受

and have an idea of what lay ahead for me.

且知道我接下來要面對什麼。

But I also didn't want her to have to relive her cancer experience.

但我也不想讓她 再走過一次她的癌症經驗。

What I didn't appreciate at the time

我當時還不知道，

was that work was about to play a huge role in my treatment and recovery.

工作將會在我的治療和恢復中 扮演很重要的角色。

That it would be my coworkers and my job

後來是我的同事和我的工作

that would make me feel valuable and human

讓我覺得我有價值、我是人，

at times when I would have otherwise felt like a statistic.

要不然，我那時可能 會覺得自己只是統計數字。

That it would be my job that would give me routine and stability

是我的工作給了我 例行公事和穩定性，

when I was dealing with so many difficult personal decisions

那時我需要處理好多困難的個人決定

and so much uncertainty.

和好多的不確定性。

Like, what sort of breast reconstruction I was going to have.

比如，我要做哪一種乳房重建。

And at a time like that,

在那樣的時刻，

you would think that I would turn to my family and friends for support.

你們可能會認為， 我應該向家人朋友尋求支持。

And yes, of course I did that.

是的，當然我有這麼做。

But it would ultimately be my colleagues

但最終還是我的同事

who would play a huge role in my day-to-day life.

在我每天的生活中扮演重要的角色。

And they would be the ones to make me laugh.

讓我笑的人是他們。

You see, we were a pretty close team,

我們是個很親密的團隊，

and we shared a couple of really good in-jokes,

我們有一些只有自己人 才知道的笑話，

like this time they overheard someone ask me

比如，有一次他們 不小心聽到有人問我

how I got my hair so shiny and perfect --

怎樣能使頭髮如此閃亮、完美──

without knowing that it was, of course, a wig,

卻完全不知道，那是假髮，

and you know, it was a very good wig

而且那是頂很好的假髮，

and it did make getting ready in the mornings very easy.

它也讓早上起床之後的 梳妝整理變得很容易。

(Laughter)

（笑聲）

But in little moments like this, I appreciated what their support meant,

但像這樣的小小時刻， 我很感謝他們的支持帶給我的意義，

and I wondered what I would have done without that network.

若沒有那支持關係， 我不知道我該怎麼辦。

I've spoken with so many people, women in particular,

我和好多人談過，特別是女性，

who haven't had the chance to have that network

都是沒有機會擁有那種關係網絡的人，

because they haven't been given the opportunity to work through treatment.

因為他們在治療的過程中 都沒有機會工作。

And there are several reasons for this.

這背後有好幾個原因。

But I think it mostly comes down to overly paternalistic employers.

但我認為主要的原因是 僱主太過家長作風了。

These employers want you to go away and focus on yourself.

這些僱主希望你走開， 專注在自己身上就好。

And come back when you're better.

當你比較好之後再回來。

And they use those kinds of phrases.

他們會用像那樣的說詞。

And while these responses are well-meaning,

雖然他們的這些反應都是出於好意，

knowing the benefits it brought me,

但我知道工作帶給我的益處，

it makes me incredibly frustrated

所以當聽到癌症病人被告知

他們不能或不該工作時， 我就會覺得非常灰心，

when people are told that they couldn’t or shouldn't work,

when it's something that they want to do and physically can do.

因為他們想要工作， 且身體上也能夠辦到。

So I started to look into what an employer is required to do

所以我開始研究，當員工向僱主提出

when someone presents with a cancer diagnosis.

癌症診斷書時，僱主需要做什麼。

I discovered that under Australian law, cancer is considered a disability.

我發現，在澳洲法律中， 癌症被視為殘疾。

So if you are unable to perform your usual work duties,

所以，如果你無法進行 你平常的工作職責，

your employer is obligated by the Disability Discrimination Act

根據殘疾歧視法案，你的僱主有義務

to make reasonable adjustments to your working arrangements,

要針對你的工作安排做合理的調整，

so that you can continue to work.

讓你能夠繼續工作。

What would reasonable adjustments look like for me?

對我來說，合理的調整是什麼樣的？

I knew the obvious impacts my diagnosis was going to have on work.

我知道我的診斷對於工作 會有哪些明顯的影響。

Medical appointments would be scheduled during business hours,

醫療診治的時間都排訂在上班時段，

and I knew that I would need time off to recover from surgical procedures.

我也知道在手術之後 我會需要時間恢復。

Again, being a typical lawyer,

同樣的，身為很典型的律師，

I had done my due diligence on what to expect from treatment.

對於治療要有什麼樣的期待， 我已做了法律相關的盡職調查。

Admittedly, a lot of that was through Doctor Google,

無可否認，許多調查 是通過 Google 教授做的，

perhaps not my best move and I wouldn't recommend that.

那可能不是我最好的對策， 我不建議這麼做。

(Laughter)

（笑聲）

But while I was ready for all the physical side effects,

雖然我準備好迎接 所有身體上的副作用，

what really scared me was this thing called chemo brain.

真正讓我害怕的， 是所謂的「化療腦」。

Chemo brain presents itself through memory loss,

化療腦出現的形式包括記憶喪失、

an inability to concentrate

無法專心，

and an inability to solve problems.

以及無法解決問題。

And if this happened to me,

如果這發生在我身上，

I wondered how I was going to do my job as a lawyer.

我不知道我要如何做我的律師工作。

Would I be forced to leave work?

我會被迫離開工作嗎？

And how could I possibly have a discussion with my manager

我怎麼可能和我的經理討論

about reasonable adjustments to my working arrangements

我的工作安排要做哪些合理調整，

when I didn't know how I was going to be impacted?

如果我連我會如何被影響都不知道？

I was fortunate to have a supportive manager

我很幸運，有個支持我的經理，

who was happy to see how things went as we went along,

他很樂意隨著發展再看狀況如何，

rather than requiring a concrete plan up front.

而不是要求事前就要有具體的計畫。

I was lucky that while he may not have even known

我很幸運，他甚至可能不知道

about this concept of reasonable adjustments,

這個合理調整的觀念，

to him, it was just common sense.

對他來說，這只是常識。

But I've learned that it's not common sense to everyone.

但我發現這並非對所有人都是常識。

Everyone going through treatment will learn how it impacts them

所有要經歷治療的人， 都會了解到治療對他們的影響，

and what their limitations are.

以及他們的限制是什麼。

And they'll learn to adjust for that.

他們會學會做相應的調整。

So for me, there were the tips and tricks that I learned about the treatment itself,

所以，對我來說，關於治療本身， 我學到了一些密訣和訣竅，

like, before you go to chemo,

比如，在你去化療之前，

you need to make sure you're really well hydrated

你得要確保你自己有足夠的水分，

and that you're warm, because it helps the nurses to find your veins.

且要注意保暖，因為那樣 能協助護士找到你的靜脈。

And make sure that you don't eat any of your favorite food,

還要確保你不吃任何你最愛的食物，

either before or after chemo,

化療前或化療後都不行，

because you're going to be throwing that up

因為你會把它吐出來，

and you won't ever want to look at it again.

且你永遠不會想要再看它一眼了。

(Laughter)

（笑聲）

I learned that one the hard way.

這點我是從痛苦經驗學來的。

And then there were the tricks for managing my workflow.

另外，還有關於管理 我的工作流程的訣竅。

I scheduled chemo for first thing on a Monday morning.

我把化療安排為 星期一早上的第一件事。

I knew that from the time I left the cancer care unit,

我知道從我離開癌症照護單位之後，

I had about four hours before this fog screen would come down

我會有大約四小時時間， 接著霧幕就會出現，

and I would start to be sick.

我就會開始不舒服。

So I would use that time to clean my inbox and make any urgent calls.

我會用那段時間，清理我的 收件匣並打一些緊急的電話。

The worst of the sickness would be gone within about 48 hours.

最不舒服的狀況會在 48 小時以內就過去。

And then I would log back into work from home.

接著我會從家中開始工作。

This treatment continued and I knew what to expect.

治療繼續下去， 而我知道該預期什麼。

I was able to set reasonable expectations with my business partners

我能夠和我的生意伙伴 設下合理的期望，

about what I could do

關於我能做些什麼，

and the time frames that I could do it in.

以及我要多少時間來完成期望。

But I still remember the hesitation in their voices

但我還記得，他們帶著 遲疑的聲音來找我，

when it came to asking for things.

要求我做一些事，

And asking me to do things by a certain time.

要求我在某個時限內完成事情。

And trust me, these were people

相信我，這些人都

that were not afraid of setting a good deadline.

不怕設下好的截止期限。

(Laughter)

（笑聲）

I got the impression they didn't want to put any extra pressure on me

我的印象是，他們不想 在我身上增加額外的壓力，

while I was going through treatment.

因為我一邊要接受治療。

And while I appreciated the sentiment,

雖然我很感謝那樣的情操，

I actually needed the deadlines.

我其實是需要截止期限的。

To me, that was something within my control

對我來說，那是我能控制的東西，

and something that could stay in my control

且是我能持續控制的東西，

when there were so many things that couldn't.

在這時期有太多我無法控制的了。

And as I was working from home,

當我在家工作時，

I was thinking about how employers should be applying this concept

我在想在我們目前 這個時代，僱主要如何把

of reasonable adjustments in our current age,

這合理調整的概念實際應用出來，

where one in two Australian men and women

現在，在澳洲，每兩位 男性及女性中就有一位，

will be diagnosed with cancer by the age of 85.

會在 85 歲之前被診斷出癌症。

So, as we continue to work longer and longer into older age,

隨著我們在職場上工作越久， 我們的年齡也在增長，

the chances of having a serious illness while we're in the workforce

在職場上工作時 得到嚴重疾病的可能性

are increasing.

也在增加。

And with technology enabling us to work anywhere, any time,

現在科技讓我們可以 在任何地方、任何時間工作，

reasonable adjustments are no longer contingent upon

合理調整就不再受限於

whether or not you can continue to physically make it

你是否能持續實際去 實體的辦公室工作。

into the physical office.

Reasonable adjustments are also not about

合理調整的重點也不在於

just offering a longer break or a comfier chair to sit in,

提供更長的休息時間 和更舒服的座椅，

although those things might be good, too.

不過能有這些也不賴。

At the very least,

最少，

we need to be applying the flexibility policies and strategies

我們必須要能夠實施我們為其他情況

we've developed for other scenarios,

發展出來彈性政策和策略，

like for people with family responsibilities.

比如為了有家庭責任的人所發展的。

But how can we ensure that people are even having a conversation

但我們要如何確保大家有機會進行

about what reasonable adjustments might look like for them

怎樣合理調整才適合的對話，

if a manager's first response is to say,

如果經理的第一個反應就是說：

"Oh no, don't come back to work until you're better."

「喔，不，在你好轉之前 都別回來上班。」

And a light went on for me.

而有一盞燈為我亮了起來。

It must be compulsory for managers

經理和其旗下員工進行

to have to have these conversations with their employees.

這類對談，必須要是強制性的。

And lessons from people like me,

像我這樣子在治療過程中，

that have really benefited from working through treatment,

持續工作而受益的人所學到的教訓，

need to be more widely shared.

需要被廣泛分享出去。

And I thought about what could be done to guide these conversations,

我思考過能怎樣引導這類對談，

and then an amazing colleague of mine, Camilla Gunn,

然後我有一位了不起的同事 卡蜜拉甘恩（Camilla Gunn），

developed a "Working with Cancer" toolkit.

發展出了一套 「帶著癌症工作」工具組。

The toolkit provides a framework for those diagnosed,

這套工具組提供了一架構 給被診斷出癌症的人、

their managers, their carers and their coworkers

他們的經理、他們的照護者， 以及他們的同事，

to have conversations about cancer and the work support available.

讓他們能針對癌症 以及可得的工作支援進行對談。

Camilla and I have now been to other organizations

卡蜜拉和我現在已經去過一些組織，

to talk about the toolkit

去談這套工具組，

and how it can help to guide through

以及它如何能協助引導大家

what, quite frankly, are otherwise some pretty awkward conversations.

進行這些本來勢必會 相當尷尬的對談。

And I'm pleased to say that the uptake of the toolkit is increasing.

我很高興能夠說， 越來越多人在使用這套工具組。

So what should be a manager's first response

經理的第一個反應應該是什麼，

when somebody says that they're sick

當聽到有人說他們生病了，

and they don't know how it's going to impact their work?

且不知道這疾病會 如何影響他們的工作？

It must be this:

經理的反應必須要是這樣的：

"To the extent that you are able, and want to,

「在你能做到且想要做到的範圍內，

we would love to work out an arrangement for you

我們很樂意為你做出安排，

to continue to work through treatment."

讓你能在治療過程中持續工作。」

We need to start positively engaging people with serious illness

我們需要開始積極吸引 患有嚴重疾病的人員，

to keep them in the workforce,

讓他們繼續留在工作崗位上，

rather than paternalistically pushing them away.

而不是採取家長式的態度推開他們。

I've told you my story because I want you to know the benefits

我把我的故事告訴各位， 是因為我希望你們能夠了解

在治療期間持續工作帶給我的益處。

that working through treatment brought me.

And I also want to change your perceptions

我也想要改變各位的看法，

if you think that somebody going through treatment

如果你們覺得在接受治療的人

is just bored, frail and vomiting a lot.

就是感到厭倦、虛弱，和常常嘔吐。

And yes, these things were true some of the time,

是的，的確，就算不是經常，

if not a lot of the time,

至少也有時是這樣沒錯，

but I was also determined to push myself at work

但我也下決心，要在工作上盡全力，

as much as I had always done.

就像我過去一直以來那樣。

And I was able to do that because my employer gave me the choice.

我之所以能夠做到， 是因為我的僱主給我這個選擇。

Most importantly, I'm telling you

最重要的，我跟各位說這個故事，

because while it's a seemingly obvious choice to give someone,

是因為，雖然似乎本來就 應該要給予這個選擇，

it's not one that is always offered or encouraged.

通常，這個選擇卻沒有 被提供或被鼓勵提供。

And it must be.

這是必須要做的。

Thank you.

謝謝。

(Applause)

（掌聲）