"Stumbling towards intimacy": An improvised TED Talk | Anthony Veneziale

翻译人员: Shupeng Han 校对人员: Yinchun Rui

[This is an improvised talk (and intro)

[这是一场即兴演讲(和介绍)

based on a suggested topic from the audience.

基于观众建议的话题。

The speaker doesn't know the content of the slides.]

演讲者事先并不知道幻灯片的内容。]

Moderator: Our next speaker --

主持人：有请我们的演讲者——

(Laughter)

（笑声）

is an --

他是一位 ——

incredibly --

极其——

(Laughter)

（笑声）

Is an incredibly experienced linguist

是一位经验极其丰富的语言学家

working at a lab at MIT with a small group of researchers,

他在麻省理工学院的实验室中 与一小群研究者们一同工作，

and through studying our language

他们通过研究我们的语言

and the way that we communicate with other people,

以及我们与他人交流的方式，

he has stumbled upon the secret of human intimacy.

在无意中发现了人类亲密关系的秘密。

Here to give us his perspective, please welcome to the stage,

接下来让我们听听他的见解， 把舞台交给他，

安东尼·维内基亚。

Anthony Veneziale.

(Applause)

（掌声）

(Laughter)

（笑声）

Anthony Veneziale: You might think I know what you're going through.

安东尼·维内基亚：大家可能在想 我知道你要说什么。

You might be looking at me here on the red dot,

你可能正注视着红圈中的我，

or you might be looking at me on the screen.

或是看着屏幕上的我。

There's a one sixth of a second delay.

屏幕上有六分之一秒的延迟。

Did I catch myself? I did.

那么我能看到我自己吗？当然。

I could see myself before I turned,

在我完全转身前我就能看到，

and that small delay creates a little bit of a divide.

但这几豪秒的延迟 让屏幕上的我和舞台上的我有些小小的不同。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

And a divide is exactly what happens with human language,

类似的不对等也出现在人类的语言中，

and the processing of that language.

以及语言加工的过程中。

I of course am working out of a small lab at MIT.

我的工作当然不只是 窝在麻省理工学院的一间小小实验室里。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

And we are scraping for every insight that we can get.

我们尝试剖析我们可以洞察到的一切。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

This is not often associated with a computational challenge,

这一般与计算挑战无关，

but in this case, we found that persistence of vision

但这一次， 我们发现视觉残留

and auditory intake

和听觉摄入

actually have more in common than we ever realized,

实际上比我们之前所认为的 拥有更多的相似之处，

and we can see it in this first slide.

我们可以看第一张幻灯片。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

(Applause)

（掌声）

Immediately your processing goes to, "Is that a hard-boiled egg?"

你立刻就会思考， “那是一个煮熟的鸡蛋吗？”

(Laughter)

（笑声）

"Is that perhaps the structural integrity of the egg

“也许正是因为这枚鸡蛋结构的完整性

being able to sustain the weight of what seems to be a rock?

让它能够承受一块貌似岩石的重量。

Aha, is it in fact a real rock?"

哦还有，那真的是一块货真价实的岩石吗？”

We go to questions when we see visual information.

当我们接收视觉信息时 我们会产生很多疑问，

But when we hear information, this is what happens.

但如果信息来源于听觉， 就会发生这样的情况。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

The floodgates in our mind open much like the streets of Shanghai.

我们的思维闸门洞开， 就跟上海热闹的街道一样。

(Applause)

（笑声）

So many pieces of information to process,

我们需要加工太多太多的信息，

so many ideas, concepts, feelings and, of course, vulnerabilities

很多想法、概念、感受， 当然还有些难以启齿的内容，

that we don't often wish to share.

我们不太愿意分享。

And so we hide,

因此我们把这些隐藏起来，

and we hide behind what we like to call the floodgate of intimacy.

藏在所谓的“亲密关系”这道闸门的后面。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

And what might that floodgate be holding?

那么这扇闸门想守住什么呢？

What is the dike upon which it is built?

守住这扇闸门的堤坝又是什么呢？

Well, first off --

首先——

(Laughter)

（笑声）

we found that it's different for six different genotypes.

我们发现这有六个不同的基因型。

(Applause)

（掌声）

And, of course, we can start categorizing these genotypes

当然，我们可以开始 对这些基因型进行分类。

into a neuronormative experience and a neurodiverse experience.

分为神经规范性体验和神经多样性体验。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

On the right-hand side of the screen,

在我右手边的屏幕上，

you're seeing spikes for the neurodiverse thinking.

你可以看到神经多样性思维的峰值。

Now, there are generally only two emotional states

通常只有在两种情绪状态下，

that a neurodiverse brain can tabulate and keep count of at any given time,

神经多样性思维可以随时统计和计数，

thereby eliminating the possibility for them to be emotionally, sometimes,

从而消除它变得情绪化的可能性，

attuned to the present situation.

有时候它也会顺势而变。

But on the left-hand side, you can see the neuronormative brain,

但在我的左手边， 你可以看到神经规范性思维，

which can often handle about five different pieces

它通常可以随时处理五种不同类型的

of emotional cognitive information at any given time.

情感认知信息。

These are the slight variances that you are seeing

你所见到的有些差异很小，

in the 75, 90 and 60 percentile,

例如百分之75、90和60，

and then of course that dramatic difference

还有一些差异很大，

of the 25, 40 and 35 percentile.

比如25、40和35这三个百分数。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

But of course, what is the neural network

当然，是怎样的神经网络

that is helping to bridge and build these different discrepancies?

在帮助我们沟通和建立这些不同的差异？

(Laughter)

（笑声）

Fear.

恐惧。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

(Applause)

（掌声）

And as we all know, fear resides in the amygdala,

我们都知道， 恐惧产生于杏仁核，

and it is a very natural response,

是一种非常自然的生理反应，

and it is very closely linked with visual perception.

与人们的视觉感知息息相关。

It is not as closely linked with verbal perception,

它与我们的言语感知 并没有那么紧密的联系，

so our fear receptors often will be going off

因此我们的恐惧感受器官 会逐渐退化

in advance of any of our cognitive usage around verbal and words

在任何我们的认知作用之前 在言语、词汇

and cues of language.

以及语言线索方面。

So as we see these fear moments,

所以当我们看到这些恐怖时刻时，

we of course are taken aback.

我们自然会大吃一惊。

We stumble in a certain direction,

我们在某一方面失足，

generally away from the intimacy.

自然会在这一方面疏远开来。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

Now of course, there's a difference between the male perception

当然，男性的感知不同于

and the female perception

女性的感知，

and of trans and those who are in between, all of those as well,

也不同于变性者或其他性别者的感知，

and outside of the gender spectrum.

亦不同于性别谱之外的人群的感知。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

But fear is the central underlying underpinning

但是恐惧是核心基础

of all of our response systems.

在我们所有的反应系统中。

Fight-or-flight is one of the earliest,

战斗或是逃跑是 我们最早对环境的反应行为，

some say reptilian, response to our environment.

也有人说是爬行。

How can we disengage or unhook ourselves from the horns of the amygdala?

那我们如何才能 从杏仁核的号角声中脱离开来呢？

(Laughter)

（笑声）

Well, I'd like to tell you the secret right now.

那么现在我就告诉你这个秘密。

(Applause)

（掌声）

This is all making much, much too much sense.

这一切都非常， 太能讲得通了。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

The secret lies

这个秘密就是

in turning our backs to one another,

彼此间相互隐瞒。

and I know that that sounds absolutely like the opposite

我知道这个理论和你们期望的

of what you were expecting,

恰恰相反，

but when in a relationship you turn your back to your partner

但是当你处于一段恋爱中时， 你隐瞒对方，

and place your back upon their back --

你的另一半也对你有所隐瞒，

(Laughter)

（笑声）

you eliminate visual cues.

那么你们就消除了视觉线索。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

(Applause)

（掌声）

You are more readily available

我们就更容易

to failing first,

先失败，

and failing first --

而先失败——

(Laughter)

（笑声）

far outweighs the lengths we go to

价值远远超过我们去

to appeal to others,

吸引他人，

to our partners and to ourselves.

吸引我们的另一半和我们自己。

We spend billions and billions of dollars

我们花费了数十亿美元

on clothing, on makeup,

在衣服和化妆品上，

on the latest trend of glasses,

在最潮的眼镜上，

but what we don't spend money and time on

但是我们从不花费金钱和时间

is connecting with each other

在联络彼此上。

in a way that is truthful

联络彼此才是真实的、

and honest

诚挚的、

and stripped of those visual receptors.

剥去那些低级视觉感受的方式。

(Applause)

（掌声）

(Laughter)

（笑声）

It sounds hard, doesn't it?

听起来很难，是吗？

(Laughter)

（笑声）

But we want to be aggressive about this.

但是我们要对此有冲劲。

We don't want to just sit on the couch.

我们不能总是闲坐在沙发上。

As a historian said earlier today,

正如一位历史学家 今天早些时候所说的，

it's important to get up and circumvent sometimes that couch.

把屁股离开沙发是很重要。

And how can we do it?

那么我们应当怎么做？

Well yes, ice is a big part of it.

没错， I、C、E是其中重要的一部分，

Insights, compassion and empathy:

洞察力、同情心和共情。

I, C, E.

这就是所谓的I、C、E。

(Applause)

（掌声）

And when we start using this ice method,

当我们开始使用这种方法的时候，

well, the possibilities become much bigger than us.

可能性比我们想象的要大很多。

In fact, they become smaller than you.

但事实上，可能性将会变小。

On a molecular level,

从分子的层面上来说，

I believe that that insight

我相信洞察力

is the unifying theme

是共通的主题之一，

for every talk you have seen so far at TED

无论是你迄今为止 看过的哪一集TED，

and will continue as we of course embark

并且这一主题还将持续下去

on this journey here on this tiny planet,

在我们渺小星球的短暂旅程之中，

on the ledge, on the precipice,

无论是悬崖还是峭壁，

as we are seeing, yes, death is inevitable.

正如我们所看到的那样， 死亡不可避免。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

Will it meet all of us at the same time,

死亡对于我们来说是否会同时到来，

I think, is the variable we are inquiring.

我想这是我们正持续探索的问题。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

I think that timeline gets a bit longer

我觉得时间会变得长一些，

when we use ice

当我们用ICE的方式，

and when we rest our backs upon one another

当我们背靠背

and build together,

一起努力，

leaving behind the fear

当我们将恐惧抛在脑后，

and working towards --

并携手并进之时——

(Laughter)

（笑声）

they'll edit this part out --

他们会把这部分编辑出来的——

(Laughter)

（笑声）

a ripened experience of love,

成熟的爱、

compassion,

同情

intimacy based on a truth

以及亲密关系都建立在一个事实之上

that you are sharing from your mind's eye

那就是你的分享来源于你的头脑、

and the heart that we all can touch,

你的心灵中我们都能触碰到的部分、

tactilely feel,

我们都能感知到的部分，

have maybe potentially a mushy experience

也许可能是一次并不愉快的经历，

that we don't just throw out because it is browned,

但我们不会因为它变质了 就随意丢弃，

but let us slice in half the experience we have gathered,

我们会把以前的经验一分为二，

let us seed what the heart, the core,

我们会在内心深处最中心的地带播种，

the seed of that idea in each of us is,

把我们的想法埋在种子里，

and let us share it back to back.

并放心踏实地互相分享。

Thank you very much.

感谢聆听。

(Applause)

（掌声）