I grew up in the Westboro Baptist Church. Here's why I left | Megan Phelps-Roper

6,657,358 views

2017-03-06 ใƒป TED


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I grew up in the Westboro Baptist Church. Here's why I left | Megan Phelps-Roper

6,657,358 views ใƒป 2017-03-06

TED


์•„๋ž˜ ์˜๋ฌธ์ž๋ง‰์„ ๋”๋ธ”ํด๋ฆญํ•˜์‹œ๋ฉด ์˜์ƒ์ด ์žฌ์ƒ๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.

๋ฒˆ์—ญ: keun_young Lee ๊ฒ€ํ† : Ju Hye Lim
00:12
I was a blue-eyed, chubby-cheeked five-year-old
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์ €๋Š” ํŒŒ๋ž€ ๋ˆˆ์˜ ๋บจ์ด ํ†ตํ†ตํ•œ 5์„ธ ์—ฌ์•„์˜€์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
00:15
when I joined my family on the picket line for the first time.
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๊ทธ ๋•Œ ์ €๋Š” ์ฒ˜์Œ์œผ๋กœ ๊ฐ€์กฑ๊ณผ ํ•จ๊ป˜ ํ”ผ์ผ“ ๋ผ์ธ์— ์„ฐ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
00:19
My mom made me leave my dolls in the minivan.
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์–ด๋จธ๋‹˜์€ ๋ฏธ๋‹ˆ๋ฐด์— ์ธํ˜•์„ ๋‘๊ณ  ์˜ค๊ฒŒ ํ•˜์…จ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
00:22
I'd stand on a street corner in the heavy Kansas humidity,
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์ €๋Š” ์Šตํ•œ ์บ”์‚ฌ์Šค์˜ ๊ณจ๋ชฉ ์–ด๊ท€์— ์„œ ์žˆ๊ณค ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
00:25
surrounded by a few dozen relatives,
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์ˆ˜์‹ญ ๋ช…์˜ ์นœ์ฒ™๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ๋‘˜๋Ÿฌ์‹ธ์ธ ์ฑ„ ๋ง์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
00:28
with my tiny fists clutching a sign that I couldn't read yet:
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๊ณ ์‚ฌ๋ฆฌ ๊ฐ™์€ ์†์œผ๋กœ ์ฝ์ง€๋„ ๋ชปํ•˜๋Š” ํ”ผ์ผ“์„ ๋“  ์ฑ„๋กœ์š”.
00:32
"Gays are worthy of death."
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"๊ฒŒ์ด๋“ค์€ ์ฃฝ์–ด ๋งˆ๋•…ํ•˜๋‹ค."
00:34
This was the beginning.
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๊ทธ๊ฒŒ ์‹œ์ž‘์ด์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
00:36
Our protests soon became a daily occurrence
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ์˜ ์‹œ์œ„๋Š” ๊ณง ์ผ์ƒ์ด์ž,
00:39
and an international phenomenon,
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๊ตญ์ œ์ ์ธ ํ˜„์ƒ์ด ๋˜์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
00:41
and as a member of Westboro Baptist Church,
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์›จ์ŠคํŠธ๋ณด๋กœ ์นจ๋ก€๊ตํšŒ์˜ ์ผ์›์œผ๋กœ์„œ
00:43
I became a fixture on picket lines across the country.
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์ €๋Š” ์ „๊ตญ์„ ๋Œ์•„๋‹ค๋‹ˆ๋ฉฐ ํ”ผ์ผ“์„ ๋“œ๋Š” ๋ถ™๋ฐ•์ด๊ฐ€ ๋˜์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
00:46
The end of my antigay picketing career
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์ œ ๋™์„ฑ์• ์ž ๋ฐ˜๋Œ€ ์‹œ์œ„ ๊ฒฝ๋ ฅ๊ณผ
00:49
and life as I knew it,
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์ œ๊ฐ€ ์•Œ๋˜ ์ธ์ƒ์˜ ๋์€
00:50
came 20 years later,
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20๋…„ ํ›„์— ์™”์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
00:52
triggered in part by strangers on Twitter
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ํŠธ์œ„ํ„ฐ์—์„œ ๋ชจ๋ฅด๋Š” ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด ๋ณด์—ฌ์ค€
00:54
who showed me the power of engaging the other.
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ํƒ€์ธ๊ณผ ๊ต์ œํ•˜๋Š” ํž˜์— ์˜ํ•ด ์ด‰๋ฐœ๋˜์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
00:59
In my home,
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์ €์˜ ์ง‘์—์„œ
01:00
life was framed as an epic spiritual battle between good and evil.
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์‚ถ์€ ์„ ๊ณผ ์•… ์‚ฌ์ด์˜ ์žฅ๋Œ€ํ•œ ์˜์  ์ „ํˆฌ๋กœ ์—ฌ๊ฒจ์กŒ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:04
The good was my church and its members,
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์„ ์€ ์ œ ๊ตํšŒ์™€ ๊ทธ ์ผ์›๋“ค์ด์—ˆ๊ณ 
01:06
and the evil was everyone else.
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์•…์€ ๊ทธ ๋ฐ–์˜ ๋ชจ๋“  ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:09
My church's antics were such
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์ œ ๊ตํšŒ๋Š” ๊ทธ๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ์ด์ƒํ•ด์„œ
01:11
that we were constantly at odds with the world,
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ํ•ญ์ƒ ์„ธ์ƒ๊ณผ ๋ฐ˜๋ชฉํ•˜๊ณ  ์žˆ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:13
and that reinforced our otherness on a daily basis.
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๊ทธ๊ฑด ๋งค์ผ๋งค์ผ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋ฅผ ํŠน์ดํ•œ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค๋กœ ๋งŒ๋“ค์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:17
"Make a difference between the unclean and the clean,"
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"๋”๋Ÿฌ์šด ๊ฒƒ๊ณผ ๊นจ๋—ํ•œ ๊ฒƒ์„ ๊ตฌ๋ถ„ํ•˜๋ผ,"๊ณ 
01:20
the verse says,
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์„ฑ๊ฒฝ๊ตฌ์ ˆ์€ ๋งํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:21
and so we did.
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ๋”ฐ๋ž์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:22
From baseball games to military funerals,
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์•ผ๊ตฌ ๊ฒฝ๊ธฐ์—์„œ ๊ตฐ์žฅ์— ์ด๋ฅด๊ธฐ๊นŒ์ง€
01:24
we trekked across the country with neon protest signs in hand
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ์‹œ์œ„์˜ ๋„ค์˜จ์‚ฌ์ธ์„ ๋“ค๊ณ  ์ „๊ตญ ๋ฐฉ๋ฐฉ๊ณก๊ณก์„ ๋ˆ„๋ณ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:28
to tell others exactly how "unclean" they were
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๊ทธ๋“ค์ด ์–ผ๋งˆ๋‚˜ "๋”๋Ÿฌ์šด"์ง€
01:31
and exactly why they were headed for damnation.
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์™œ ์ง€์˜ฅ์œผ๋กœ ๊ฐ€๊ฒŒ๋  ์ง€๋ฅผ ์ •ํ™•ํžˆ ์•Œ๋ ค์ฃผ๊ธฐ ์œ„ํ•ด์„œ์š”.
01:35
This was the focus of our whole lives.
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์ด๊ฒƒ์ด ์šฐ๋ฆฌ ์‚ถ์˜ ๋ชฉํ‘œ์˜€๊ณ ,
01:38
This was the only way for me to do good in a world that sits in Satan's lap.
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์‚ฌํƒ„์˜ ๋ฌด๋ฆŽ์— ์•‰์•„์žˆ๋Š” ์„ธ์ƒ ์†์—์„œ ์„ ์„ ํ–‰ํ•˜๋Š” ์œ ์ผํ•œ ๊ธธ์ด์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:43
And like the rest of my 10 siblings,
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์ œ 10๋ช…์˜ ํ˜•์ œ์ž๋งค๋“ค์ฒ˜๋Ÿผ
01:45
I believed what I was taught with all my heart,
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์ œ๊ฐ€ ๋ฐฐ์šด ๊ฒƒ์„ ์‹ ๋ด‰ํ–ˆ๊ณ 
01:47
and I pursued Westboro's agenda with a special sort of zeal.
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์›จ์ŠคํŠธ๋ณด๋กœ์˜ ํ–‰๋™ ์ง€์นจ์„ ๊ฐ๋ณ„ํ•œ ์—ด์ •์„ ๊ฐ€์ง€๊ณ  ์ข‡์•˜์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:51
In 2009, that zeal brought me to Twitter.
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2009๋…„์— ๊ทธ ์—ด์ •์€ ์ €๋ฅผ ํŠธ์œ„ํ„ฐ๋กœ ์ธ๋„ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:55
Initially, the people I encountered on the platform
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์ฒ˜์Œ์—๋Š” ๊ทธ ํ”Œ๋žซํผ์—์„œ ์ œ๊ฐ€ ์กฐ์šฐํ•œ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์€
01:57
were just as hostile as I expected.
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์˜ˆ์ƒํ•œ๋Œ€๋กœ ์ ๋Œ€์ ์ด์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:00
They were the digital version of the screaming hordes
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๊ทธ๋“ค์€ ์†Œ๋ฆฌ์ง€๋ฅด๋Š” ๋ฌด๋ฆฌ์˜ ๋””์ง€ํ„ธ ๋ฒ„์ „์ด์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:02
I'd been seeing at protests since I was a kid.
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์ œ๊ฐ€ ์–ด๋ ธ์„ ๋•Œ๋ถ€ํ„ฐ ์‹œ์œ„์—์„œ ๋ณด์•„์˜จ ์†Œ๋ฆฌ์ง€๋ฅด๋Š” ๋ฌด๋ฆฌ๋“ค ๋ง์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:05
But in the midst of that digital brawl,
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ๋””์ง€ํ„ธ ํˆฌ์Ÿ์˜ ํ•œ๊ฐ€์šด๋ฐ์—์„œ
02:07
a strange pattern developed.
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์ด์ƒํ•œ ํŒจํ„ด์ด ๋‚˜ํƒ€๋‚ฌ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:10
Someone would arrive at my profile with the usual rage and scorn,
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๋ˆ„๊ตฐ๊ฐ€ ์ œ ํ”„๋กœํ•„์— ์—ฌ๋Š ๋•Œ์™€ ๊ฐ™์ด ๋ถ„๋…ธ์™€ ๊ฒฝ๋ฉธ๊ณผ ํ•จ๊ป˜ ์ ‘๊ทผํ•˜๋ฉด
02:14
I would respond with a custom mix of Bible verses, pop culture references
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์ €๋Š” ์„ฑ๊ฒฝ ๊ตฌ์ ˆ๊ณผ ๋Œ€์ค‘๋ฌธํ™”์— ๋‚˜์˜ค๋Š” ๋‚ด์šฉ๋“ค๊ณผ ๋ฏธ์†Œ ์ด๋ชจํ‹ฐ์ฝ˜์œผ๋กœ
02:18
and smiley faces.
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๋‹ตํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:21
They would be understandably confused and caught off guard,
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๊ทธ๋“ค์€ ๋‹น์—ฐํžˆ ๋‹นํ™ฉ์Šค๋Ÿฌ์›Œํ•˜๋ฉฐ ํ—ˆ๋ฅผ ์ฐ”๋ฆฐ ๋ฐ˜์‘์„ ๋ณด์˜€์ง€๋งŒ
02:25
but then a conversation would ensue.
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๋Œ€ํ™”๋Š” ๊ณ„์†๋˜์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:27
And it was civil --
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์„œ๋กœ ๋งค๋„ˆ๋ฅผ ์ง€์ผฐ๊ณ ,
02:29
full of genuine curiosity on both sides.
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์„œ๋กœ์— ๋Œ€ํ•œ ์ง„์ •ํ•œ ํ˜ธ๊ธฐ์‹ฌ์— ๊ฐ€๋“์ฐผ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:32
How had the other come to such outrageous conclusions about the world?
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์–ด๋–ป๊ฒŒ ์ƒ๋Œ€๋ฐฉ์ด ์„ธ์ƒ์— ๋Œ€ํ•ด ๊ทธ๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ํ„ฐ๋ฌด๋‹ˆ์—†๋Š” ๊ฒฐ๋ก ์„ ๋‚ด๋ ธ๋Š”๊ฐ€?
02:36
Sometimes the conversation even bled into real life.
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์–ด์ฉ” ๋•Œ๋Š” ๋Œ€ํ™”๊ฐ€ ํ˜„์‹ค๋กœ๊นŒ์ง€ ๋ฒˆ์ ธ ๋“ค์–ด์™”์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:39
People I'd sparred with on Twitter
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ํŠธ์œ„ํ„ฐ์—์„œ ์ œ๊ฐ€ ๋…ผ์Ÿ์„ ๋ฒŒ์˜€๋˜ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์€
02:41
would come out to the picket line to see me
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๊ทธ๋“ค์ด ์‚ฌ๋Š” ๋„์‹œ์— ์‹œ์œ„ํ•˜๋Ÿฌ ๊ฐ”์„ ๋•Œ
02:44
when I protested in their city.
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์ €๋ฅผ ๋ณด๋Ÿฌ ํ”ผ์ผ“๋ผ์ธ์— ์˜ค๊ณค ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:46
A man named David was one such person.
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๋ฐ์ด๋น—์ด๋ผ๋Š” ํ•œ ๋‚จ์ž๋„ ๊ทธ๋Ÿฐ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:49
He ran a blog called "Jewlicious,"
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๊ทธ๋Š” Jewlicious๋ผ๋Š” ๋ธ”๋กœ๊ทธ๋ฅผ ์šด์˜ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:52
and after several months of heated but friendly arguments online,
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์ˆ˜ ๊ฐœ์›” ๋™์•ˆ ์˜จ๋ผ์ธ ์ƒ์—์„œ ์—ด๋ ์ง€๋งŒ ํ˜ธ์˜์ ์ธ ๋…ผ์Ÿ์„ ๋ฒŒ์ธ ํ›„์—
02:55
he came out to see me at a picket in New Orleans.
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๊ทธ๋Š” ๋‰ด์˜ฌ๋ฆฌ์–ธ์Šค์˜ ํ”ผ์ผ“๋ผ์ธ์— ์ €๋ฅผ ๋ณด๋Ÿฌ ๋‚˜์™”์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:58
He brought me a Middle Eastern dessert from Jerusalem, where he lives,
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๊ทธ๋Š” ์ œ๊ฒŒ ์ž๊ธฐ๊ฐ€ ์‚ฌ๋Š” ๊ณณ์ธ ์˜ˆ๋ฃจ์‚ด๋ ˜์˜ ์ค‘๋™๋ถ€ ๋””์ €ํŠธ๋ฅผ ๊ฐ€์ ธ์™”์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:02
and I brought him kosher chocolate
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์ €๋Š” ๊ทธ์—๊ฒŒ ์ฝ”์…” ์ดˆ์ฝœ๋ฆฟ์„ ๊ฐ€์ ธ๋‹ค ์ฃผ์—ˆ๋Š”๋ฐ
03:04
and held a "God hates Jews" sign.
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"์‹ ์€ ์œ ๋Œ€์ธ์„ ์ฆ์˜คํ•œ๋‹ค"๋Š” ํ”ผ์ผ“์„ ๋“ค๊ณ  ์žˆ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:06
(Laughter)
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(์›ƒ์Œ)
03:08
There was no confusion about our positions,
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์„œ๋กœ์˜ ์ž…์žฅ์— ๋Œ€ํ•œ ํ˜ผ๋™์€ ์—†์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:10
but the line between friend and foe was becoming blurred.
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์ ๊ณผ ๋™์ง€ ๊ฐ„์˜ ๊ฒฝ๊ณ„์„ ์€ ํฌ๋ฏธํ•ด์ ธ ๊ฐ”์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:14
We'd started to see each other as human beings,
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ์„œ๋กœ๋ฅผ ์ธ๊ฐ„์œผ๋กœ์„œ ์ณ๋‹ค๋ณด๊ธฐ ์‹œ์ž‘ํ–ˆ๊ณ 
03:16
and it changed the way we spoke to one another.
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๊ทธ๊ฒƒ์€ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ์„œ๋กœ์—๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•˜๋Š” ๋ฐฉ์‹์„ ๋ฐ”๊ฟจ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:20
It took time,
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์‹œ๊ฐ„์€ ๊ฑธ๋ ธ์ง€๋งŒ
03:21
but eventually these conversations planted seeds of doubt in me.
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์ด๋Ÿฌํ•œ ๋Œ€ํ™”๋“ค์€ ์ œ ์•ˆ์— ์˜ํ˜น์˜ ์”จ์•—์„ ์‹ฌ๊ฒŒ ๋˜์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:24
My friends on Twitter took the time to understand Westboro's doctrines,
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ํŠธ์œ„ํ„ฐ ์ƒ์˜ ์ œ ์นœ๊ตฌ๋“ค์€ ์‹œ๊ฐ„์„ ๋‚ด์„œ ์›จ์ŠคํŠธ๋ณด๋กœ ์‹ ์กฐ๋ฅผ ์•Œ์•„๊ฐ”์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:28
and in doing so,
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๊ทธ๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ํ•˜๋Š” ์ค‘์—,
03:29
they were able to find inconsistencies I'd missed my entire life.
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๊ทธ๋“ค์€ ์ œ๊ฐ€ ์ผ์ƒ ๋™์•ˆ ๋†“์ณค๋˜ ๋ชจ์ˆœ์„ ์ฐพ์„ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:33
Why did we advocate the death penalty for gays
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์™œ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ๊ฒŒ์ด๋“ค์˜ ์‚ฌํ˜•์„ ์ง€์ง€ํ–ˆ์„๊นŒ์š”?
03:36
when Jesus said, "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone?"
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์˜ˆ์ˆ˜๋‹˜์€ "์ฃ„๊ฐ€ ์—†๋Š” ์ž๊ฐ€ ๋จผ์ € ๋Œ์„ ๋˜์ง€๋ผ"๊ณ  ๋ง์”€ํ•˜์…จ๋Š”๋ฐ์š”.
03:41
How could we claim to love our neighbor
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์–ด๋–ป๊ฒŒ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ์ด์›ƒ์„ ์‚ฌ๋ž‘ํ•œ๋‹ค๊ณ  ๋งํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋‚˜์š”?
03:43
while at the same time praying for God to destroy them?
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์‹ ์—๊ฒŒ ์ด์›ƒ์„ ์ฒ˜๋‹จํ•ด๋‹ฌ๋ผ๊ณ  ๊ธฐ๋„ํ•˜๋ฉด์„œ ๋ง์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:47
The truth is that the care shown to me by these strangers on the internet
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์ง„์‹ค์€ ์ธํ„ฐ๋„ท ์ƒ์—์„œ ์ด ๋‚ฏ์„  ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด ์ œ๊ฒŒ ๋ณด์—ฌ์ค€ ๋ฐฐ๋ ค๊ฐ€
03:51
was itself a contradiction.
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๊ทธ ์ž์ฒด๋กœ ๋ชจ์ˆœ์ด๋ผ๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:54
It was growing evidence
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์ƒ๋Œ€๋ฐฉ์€ ์ œ๊ฐ€ ๊ต์œก๋ฐ›์€๋Œ€๋กœ์˜
03:55
that people on the other side were not the demons I'd been led to believe.
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์•…๋งˆ๊ฐ€ ์•„๋‹ˆ๋ผ๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ด ์ ์  ์ฆ๋ช…๋˜๊ณ  ์žˆ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:00
These realizations were life-altering.
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์ด๋Ÿฐ ๊นจ๋‹ฌ์Œ์€ ์ œ ์‚ถ์„ ๋ฐ”๊ฟ”๋†จ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:03
Once I saw that we were not the ultimate arbiters of divine truth
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ๊ฑฐ๋ฃฉํ•œ ์ง„๋ฆฌ์˜ ์ตœ์ข…์ ์ธ ์‹ฌํŒ์ž๊ฐ€ ์•„๋‹ˆ๋ฉฐ
04:06
but flawed human beings,
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๊ฒฐ์ ์ด ์žˆ๋Š” ์ธ๊ฐ„์ด๋ผ๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ด ๋ณด์ด์ž,
04:08
I couldn't pretend otherwise.
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์ €๋Š” ์•„๋‹Œ ์ฒ™ ํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์—†์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:10
I couldn't justify our actions --
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์ €๋Š” ์šฐ๋ฆฌ์˜ ํ–‰๋™์„ ์ •๋‹นํ™”ํ•  ์ˆ˜๊ฐ€ ์—†์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:12
especially our cruel practice of protesting funerals
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ํŠนํžˆ ์žฅ๋ก€์‹์„ ๋ฐ˜๋Œ€ํ•˜๋Š” ์ž”์ธํ•œ ํ–‰๋™๊ณผ
04:15
and celebrating human tragedy.
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์ธ๊ฐ„์˜ ๋น„๊ทน์„ ์ถ•ํ•˜ํ•˜๋Š” ํ–‰๋™ ๋ง์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:19
These shifts in my perspective
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์ €์˜ ์ธ์‹์˜ ๋ณ€ํ™”๋Š”
04:20
contributed to a larger erosion of trust in my church,
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์ด์œฝ๊ณ  ๊ตํšŒ์— ๋Œ€ํ•œ ๋ฏฟ์Œ์„ ๋” ํฌ๊ฒŒ ๋ฌด๋„ˆ๋œจ๋ ธ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:23
and eventually it made it impossible for me to stay.
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ๊ธ‰๊ธฐ์•ผ ์ œ๊ฐ€ ๋”์ด์ƒ ๋จธ๋ฌผ๋Ÿฌ ์žˆ์ง€ ๋ชปํ•˜๊ฒŒ ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:28
In spite of overwhelming grief and terror, I left Westboro in 2012.
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๋„˜์ณ๋‚˜๋Š” ์Šฌํ””๊ณผ ๋‘๋ ค์›€ ์†์—์„œ 2012๋…„์— ์›จ์ŠคํŠธ๋ณด๋กœ๋ฅผ ๋– ๋‚ฌ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:34
In those days just after I left,
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์ œ๊ฐ€ ๋– ๋‚œ ์งํ›„ ์ˆ˜ ์ผ๋™์•ˆ
04:36
the instinct to hide was almost paralyzing.
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์ˆจ๊ณ ์ž ํ•˜๋Š” ๋ณธ๋Šฅ์ด ๋„ˆ๋ฌด ๊ฐ•๋ ฌํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:40
I wanted to hide from the judgement of my family,
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์ €๋Š” ๊ฐ€์กฑ์˜ ๋น„๋‚œ์œผ๋กœ๋ถ€ํ„ฐ ์ˆจ์œผ๋ ค ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:42
who I knew would never speak to me again --
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๊ฐ€์กฑ๋“ค์ด ์ œ๊ฒŒ ๋‹ค์‹  ๋ง๋„ ๊ฑธ์ง€ ์•Š์„ ๊ฑฐ๋ผ๋Š” ๊ฑธ ์•Œ์•˜์–ด์š”.
04:44
people whose thoughts and opinions had meant everything to me.
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๊ฐ€์กฑ๋“ค์˜ ์ƒ๊ฐ๊ณผ ์˜๊ฒฌ์€ ๊ทธ๊ฐ„ ์ œ๊ฒŒ๋Š” ์ „๋ถ€์˜€์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:48
And I wanted to hide from the world I'd rejected for so long --
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์ €๋Š” ์˜ค๋žซ๋™์•ˆ ๊ฑฐ๋ถ€ํ–ˆ๋˜ ์„ธ์ƒ์œผ๋กœ๋ถ€ํ„ฐ ์ˆจ์œผ๋ ค ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:51
people who had no reason at all to give me a second chance
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์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์€ ์ œ๊ฒŒ ๋‘ ๋ฒˆ์งธ ๊ธฐํšŒ๋ฅผ ์ค„ ์ด์œ ๊ฐ€ ์—†์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:54
after a lifetime of antagonism.
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์ผ์ƒ์„ ์ ๊ฐœ์‹ฌ์œผ๋กœ ์‚ด์•„์˜จ ์ œ๊ฒŒ ๋ง์ด์ฃ .
04:57
And yet, unbelievably,
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๊ทธ๋ ‡์ง€๋งŒ ๋ฏฟ์„ ์ˆ˜ ์—†๊ฒŒ๋„
04:59
they did.
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๊ทธ๋“ค์€ ๊ธฐํšŒ๋ฅผ ์ฃผ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:00
The world had access to my past because it was all over the internet --
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์„ธ์ƒ์€ ์ œ ๊ณผ๊ฑฐ๋ฅผ ์•Œ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์ธํ„ฐ๋„ท์— ๋‹ค ํผ์ ธ ์žˆ์œผ๋‹ˆ๊นŒ์š”.
05:03
thousands of tweets and hundreds of interviews,
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์ˆ˜์ฒœ ๊ฐœ์˜ ํŠธ์œ—๊ณผ ์ˆ˜๋ฐฑ ๊ฐœ์˜ ์ธํ„ฐ๋ทฐ๊ฐ€ ์žˆ๊ณ ,
05:06
everything from local TV news to "The Howard Stern Show" --
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์ง€๋ฐฉ TV๋‰ด์Šค์—์„œ ํ˜ธ์›Œ๋“œ ์Šคํ„ด ์‡ผ์— ์ด๋ฅด๊ธฐ๊นŒ์ง€ ๋‹ค ์žˆ์—ˆ์–ด์š”.
05:09
but so many embraced me with open arms anyway.
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๊ทธ๋Ÿฐ๋ฐ ๋„ˆ๋ฌด ๋งŽ์€ ์ด๋“ค์ด ์ €๋ฅผ ๋„“์€ ๊ฐ€์Šด์œผ๋กœ ํฌ์šฉํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:13
I wrote an apology for the harm I'd caused,
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์ €๋Š” ์ œ๊ฐ€ ๋ผ์นœ ํ”ผํ•ด์— ์‚ฌ๊ณผ ํŽธ์ง€๋ฅผ ์ผ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:15
but I also knew that an apology could never undo any of it.
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๋ฌผ๋ก  ์‚ฌ๊ณผ ํŽธ์ง€๋กœ ์—Ž์ง€๋ฅธ ๋ฌผ์„ ์ฃผ์›Œ ๋‹ด์„ ์ˆ˜๋Š” ์—†์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:19
All I could do was try to build a new life
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์ œ๊ฐ€ ํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์€ ์ƒˆ ์‚ถ์„ ์‹œ์ž‘ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ๊ณผ
05:22
and find a way somehow to repair some of the damage.
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๊ณผ๊ฑฐ ํ•ด์•…์˜ ์ผ๋ถ€๋ฅผ ๋งŒํšŒํ•˜๋Š” ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์„ ์ฐพ๋Š” ๊ฒƒ ๋ฟ์ด์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:26
People had every reason to doubt my sincerity,
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์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์€ ์ €์˜ ์ง„์‹ฌ์„ ์˜์‹ฌํ•  ์ด์œ ๊ฐ€ ์ถฉ๋ถ„ํžˆ ์žˆ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:28
but most of them didn't.
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ๋Œ€๋ถ€๋ถ„ ์˜์‹ฌํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์•˜์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:30
And --
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์ œ๊ฐ€ ํ•ด ์˜จ ์ผ์„ ์ƒ๊ฐํ•˜๋ฉด
05:32
given my history,
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05:33
it was more than I could've hoped for --
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๊ทธ๊ฑด ์ œ๊ฐ€ ๋ฐ”๋ž„ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋Š” ๊ฒƒ ์ด์ƒ์ด์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:35
forgiveness and the benefit of the doubt.
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์šฉ์„œ์™€ ๋ฏฟ์–ด์ฃผ๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ด์š”.
05:38
It still amazes me.
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์ƒ๊ฐํ•˜๋ฉด ์—ฌ์ „ํžˆ ๋†€๋ž์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:40
I spent my first year away from home
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์ €๋Š” ์ง‘์„ ๋– ๋‚œ ์ฒซ ์ผ ๋…„ ๋™์•ˆ
05:44
adrift with my younger sister,
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์ €์™€ ํ•จ๊ป˜ ๋– ๋‚˜์˜จ ์—ฌ๋™์ƒ๊ณผ ๊ฐ™์ด
05:46
who had chosen to leave with me.
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์—ฐ๋ฝ์„ ๋Š๊ณ  ์ง€๋ƒˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:48
We walked into an abyss,
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ์‹ฌ์—ฐ ์†์œผ๋กœ ๊ฑธ์–ด ๋“ค์–ด๊ฐ”์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:50
but we were shocked to find the light and a way forward
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ๋†€๋ž๊ฒŒ๋„ ๋น›๊ณผ ์•ž์— ๋†“์ธ ๊ธธ์„ ๋ฐœ๊ฒฌํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:53
in the same communities we'd targeted for so long.
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์˜ค๋žซ๋™์•ˆ ํ‘œ์ ์œผ๋กœ ์‚ผ์•˜๋˜ ๊ณต๋™์ฒด์—์„œ ๋ง์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:57
David,
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ํŠธ์œ„ํ„ฐ์—์„œ ๋งŒ๋‚œ "jewlicious"์นœ๊ตฌ ๋ฐ์ด๋น—์€
05:58
my "Jewlicious" friend from Twitter,
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06:00
invited us to spend time among a Jewish community in Los Angeles.
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋ฅผ LA์˜ ์œ ๋Œ€์ธ ๊ณต๋™์ฒด์™€ ๊ฐ™์ด ์–ด์šธ๋ฆฌ๋„๋ก ์ดˆ๋Œ€ํ•ด์ฃผ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
06:04
We slept on couches in the home of a Hasidic rabbi and his wife
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ํ•˜์‹œ๋”• ๋ž๋น„ ๋ถ€๋ถ€์™€ ๋„ค ๋ช…์˜ ์ž๋…€๋“ค์ด ์‚ฌ๋Š” ์ง‘์˜
06:07
and their four kids --
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์†ŒํŒŒ์—์„œ ์žค์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
06:09
the same rabbi that I'd protested three years earlier
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์ œ๊ฐ€ 3๋…„ ์ „ ์‹œ์œ„ํ–ˆ๋˜ ๋ฐ”๋กœ ๊ทธ ๋ž๋น„์˜€์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
06:12
with a sign that said, "Your rabbi is a whore."
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"๋„ˆํฌ๋“ค์˜ ๋ž๋น„๋Š” ๋งค์ถ˜๋ถ€๋‹ค" ๋ผ๊ณ  ์“ฐ์—ฌ์ง„ ํ”ผ์ผ“์„ ๋“ค๊ณ ์„œ์š”.
06:16
We spent long hours talking about theology and Judaism and life
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ์‹ ํ•™๊ณผ ์œ ๋Œ€์ฃผ์˜์™€ ์‚ถ์— ๋Œ€ํ•ด ์˜ค๋žœ ์‹œ๊ฐ„์„ ์–˜๊ธฐํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
06:20
while we washed dishes in their kosher kitchen
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๊ทธ๋“ค์˜ ์ฝ”์…” ๋ถ€์—Œ์—์„œ์„ค๊ฑฐ์ง€๋ฅผ ํ•˜๊ณ 
06:22
and chopped vegetables for dinner.
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์ €๋… ์‹์‚ฌ๋•Œ ๋จน์„ ์•ผ์ฑ„๋ฅผ ์ฐ๋ฉด์„œ์š”.
06:25
They treated us like family.
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๊ทธ๋“ค์€ ์ €ํฌ๋ฅผ ๊ฐ€์กฑ์ฒ˜๋Ÿผ ๋Œ€ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
06:27
They held nothing against us,
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์•„๋ฌด๋Ÿฐ ์ ์˜๋„ ๋ณด์ด์ง€ ์•Š์•˜๊ณ 
06:29
and again I was astonished.
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์ €๋Š” ๋˜ ํ•œ ๋ฒˆ ๋†€๋ž์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
06:32
That period was full of turmoil,
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๊ทธ ๋‹น์‹œ๋Š” ํ˜ผ๋ž€์˜ ๋„๊ฐ€๋‹ˆ์˜€์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
06:34
but one part I've returned to often
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๊ทธ ์ค‘์—์„œ๋„ ์ œ๊ฐ€ ์ข…์ข… ๋Œ์ด์ผœ๋ณด์•˜๋˜ ๊ฒƒ์€
06:36
is a surprising realization I had during that time --
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๊ทธ ๋•Œ ์–ป์€ ๋†€๋ผ์šด ๊นจ๋‹ฌ์Œ์ด์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
06:40
that it was a relief and a privilege to let go of the harsh judgments
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์ œ ๋งˆ์Œ ์†์— ๋ณธ๋Šฅ์ ์œผ๋กœ ์ง€๋‚˜๊ฐ”๋˜ ์ œ๊ฐ€ ๋ณธ ๊ฑฐ์˜ ๋ชจ๋“  ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์— ๋Œ€ํ•œ
06:44
that instinctively ran through my mind about nearly every person I saw.
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๊ฐ€ํ˜นํ•œ ํŽธ๊ฒฌ์„ ๋‚ด๋ ค๋†“๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์€ ํŠน๊ถŒ์ด๋ฉฐ, ์•ˆ๋„๊ฐ์„ ๊ฐ€์ ธ๋‹ค ์ค€๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ด์š”.
06:49
I realized that now I needed to learn.
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์ €๋Š” ๊นจ๋‹ฌ์•˜์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์ €๋Š” ๋ฐฐ์šธ ํ•„์š”๊ฐ€ ์žˆ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒƒ๊ณผ
06:52
I needed to listen.
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๊ฒฝ์ฒญํ•  ํ•„์š”๊ฐ€ ์žˆ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฑธ์š”.
06:55
This has been at the front of my mind lately,
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์ด๊ฒŒ ์ตœ๊ทผ์— ์ œ ๋จธ๋ฆฟ์†์„ ์ฐจ์ง€ํ•˜๊ณ  ์žˆ๋˜ ์ƒ๊ฐ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
06:57
because I can't help but see in our public discourse
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์ธํ„ฐ๋„ท ์ƒ์˜ ๋Œ€ํ™” ์†์—์„œ ์ œ๊ฐ€ ์†ํ–ˆ๋˜ ๊ตํšŒ๋ฅผ
07:00
so many of the same destructive impulses that ruled my former church.
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์ง€๋ฐฐํ–ˆ๋˜ ๊ฒƒ๊ณผ ๋˜‘๊ฐ™์€ ํŒŒ๊ดด์ ์ธ ํ–‰๋™๋“ค์„ ๋งŽ์ด ๋ชฉ๊ฒฉํ–ˆ๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:05
We celebrate tolerance and diversity more than at any other time in memory,
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ๊ทธ ์–ด๋Š ๋•Œ๋ณด๋‹ค๋„ ๊ด€์šฉ๊ณผ ๋‹ค์–‘์„ฑ์„ ๋ˆ„๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์žˆ์ง€๋งŒ
07:09
and still we grow more and more divided.
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์—ฌ์ „ํžˆ ์ ์  ๋” ๋ถ„์—ด๋˜๊ณ  ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:12
We want good things --
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ์„ ์„ ์›ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:14
justice, equality, freedom, dignity, prosperity --
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์ •์˜, ํ‰๋“ฑ, ์ž์œ , ์กด์—„์„ฑ, ๋ฒˆ์˜.
07:17
but the path we've chosen
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ์„ ํƒํ•œ ๊ธธ์€
07:19
looks so much like the one I walked away from four years ago.
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์ œ๊ฐ€ 4๋…„ ์ „์— ๋– ๋‚˜์˜จ ๊ธธ๊ณผ ๋„ˆ๋ฌด๋„ ๋‹ฎ์•„์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:23
We've broken the world into us and them,
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ์„ธ์ƒ์„ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ์™€ ๊ทธ๋“ค๋กœ ๋‚˜๋ˆ„์—ˆ๊ณ 
07:26
only emerging from our bunkers long enough
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์ˆ˜์‚ฌ์  ์ˆ˜๋ฅ˜ํƒ„์„ ์ƒ๋Œ€ ์ง„์˜์—
07:28
to lob rhetorical grenades at the other camp.
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๋˜์งˆ ์‹œ๊ฐ„ ๋™์•ˆ๋งŒ ๋ฒ™์ปค์—์„œ ๋‚˜์™”์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:31
We write off half the country as out-of-touch liberal elites
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ๋‚˜๋ผ์˜ ์ ˆ๋ฐ˜์„ ์„ธ์ƒ๋ฌผ์ • ๋ชจ๋ฅด๋Š” ์—˜๋ฆฌํŠธ๋‚˜
07:35
or racist misogynist bullies.
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์ธ์ข…์ฐจ๋ณ„์ , ์—ฌ์„ฑํ˜์˜ค์  ๋ถˆ๋Ÿ‰๋ฐฐ๋กœ ์น˜๋ถ€ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:38
No nuance, no complexity, no humanity.
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๋ฏธ๋ฌ˜ํ•œ ์ฐจ์ด๋„ ๋ณต์žก์„ฑ๋„ ์ธ๋ฅ˜์• ๋„ ์—†์ด ๋ง์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:42
Even when someone does call for empathy and understanding for the other side,
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์‹ฌ์ง€์–ด ๋ˆ„๊ตฐ๊ฐ€๊ฐ€ ๊ณต๊ฐ๊ณผ ์ดํ•ด๋ฅผ ํƒ€๋ฐฉ์— ๊ตฌํ•  ๋•Œ๋„
07:46
the conversation nearly always devolves
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๋Œ€ํ™”๋Š” ๊ฑฐ์˜ ํ•ญ์ƒ
๋ˆ„๊ฐ€ ๋” ๊ณต๊ฐ์„ ๋ฐ›์•„์•ผ ํ•˜๋Š”์ง€์— ๋Œ€ํ•œ ํ† ๋ก ์ด ๋˜์–ด๋ฒ„๋ ธ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:48
into a debate about who deserves more empathy.
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07:51
And just as I learned to do,
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์ œ๊ฐ€ ํ•˜๋ผ๊ณ  ๋ฐฐ์› ๋˜ ๊ฒƒ์ฒ˜๋Ÿผ
07:53
we routinely refuse to acknowledge the flaws in our positions
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ์ผ์ƒ์ ์œผ๋กœ ์ž๊ธฐ ์ž…์žฅ์˜ ํ ์ด๋‚˜ ์ƒ๋Œ€๋ฐฉ ์ž…์žฅ์˜ ์žฅ์ ์„
07:56
or the merits in our opponent's.
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์ธ์ •ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์„ ๊ฑฐ๋ถ€ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:59
Compromise is anathema.
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ํƒ€ํ˜‘์€ ๋ฐฐ์ฒ™๋ฐ›์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:01
We even target people on our own side when they dare to question the party line.
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ ๋…ธ์„ ์— ์˜๋ฌธ์„ ํ’ˆ๋Š” ์ด๋Š” ์šฐ๋ฆฌ ํŽธ์ด๋ผ๋„ ํ‘œ์ ์ด ๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:06
This path has brought us cruel, sniping, deepening polarization,
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์ด๋Ÿฐ ๊ธธ์€ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ์—๊ฒŒ ์ž”์ธํ•จ๊ณผ ์ธ์‹ ๊ณต๊ฒฉ, ์–‘๊ทนํ™”์˜ ์‹ฌํ™”, ๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์‹ฌ์ง€์–ด๋Š”
08:11
and even outbreaks of violence.
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ํญ๋ ฅ์‚ฌํƒœ๋ฅผ ๊ฐ€์ ธ๋‹ค ์ฃผ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:13
I remember this path.
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์ €๋Š” ์ด ๊ธธ์„ ์•Œ์•„์š”.
08:15
It will not take us where we want to go.
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋ฅผ ๊ฐ€๊ณ ์ž ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ณณ์— ๋ฐ๋ ค๋‹ค ์ฃผ์ง€ ์•Š์„ ๊ฒ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:18
What gives me hope is that we can do something about this.
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์ œ๊ฒŒ ํฌ๋ง์„ ์ฃผ๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์€ ์ด๊ฑธ ํ•ด๊ฒฐํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:22
The good news is that it's simple,
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์ข‹์€ ์†Œ์‹์€ ๊ฐ„๋‹จํ•˜๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ด๊ณ ,
08:24
and the bad news is that it's hard.
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๋‚˜์œ ์†Œ์‹์€ ์–ด๋ ต๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:27
We have to talk and listen to people we disagree with.
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์šฐ๋ฆฐ ์˜๊ฒฌ์ด ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์ƒ๋Œ€ํŽธ์—๊ฒŒ ๋ง์„ ๊ฑธ๊ณ  ๊ฒฝ์ฒญํ•ด์•ผ ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:31
It's hard because we often can't fathom
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๊ทธ๋“ค์ด ์–ด๋–ป๊ฒŒ ๊ทธ๋Ÿฐ ์ž…์žฅ์„ ๊ฐ–๊ฒŒ ๋˜์—ˆ๋Š”์ง€๋ฅผ
08:33
how the other side came to their positions.
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ํ—ค์•„๋ฆด ์ˆ˜ ์—†๋Š” ๊ฒฝ์šฐ๊ฐ€ ์žˆ๊ธฐ์— ์–ด๋ ค์šด ์ผ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:36
It's hard because righteous indignation,
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์ •๋‹นํ•œ ๋ถ„๊ฐœ ์ฆ‰, ์•„๋ฐฉ์ด ์˜ณ๋‹ค๋Š” ํ™•์‹ ์ด ๋„ˆ๋ฌด๋‚˜ ์œ ํ˜น์ ์ด๊ธฐ์—
08:39
that sense of certainty that ours is the right side,
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08:42
is so seductive.
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์–ด๋ ต์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:44
It's hard because it means extending empathy and compassion
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ์—๊ฒŒ ์ ์˜์™€ ๋ถˆ๋งŒ์„ ํ‘œ์ถœํ•˜๋Š” ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ๊นŒ์ง€
08:48
to people who show us hostility and contempt.
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๊ณต๊ฐ๊ณผ ์—ฐ๋ฏผ์„ ํ™•์žฅํ•ด์•ผ ํ•˜๊ธฐ์— ์–ด๋ ต์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:51
The impulse to respond in kind is so tempting,
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๋˜‘๊ฐ™์ด ๋ฐ˜์‘ํ•˜๊ณ  ์‹ถ์€ ์ถฉ๋™์€ ๋„ˆ๋ฌด๋‚˜ ์œ ํ˜น์ ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:55
but that isn't who we want to be.
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ๋˜‘๊ฐ™์€ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด ๋˜๊ณ  ์‹ถ์ง„ ์•Š์ž–์•„์š”.
08:57
We can resist.
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ์ €ํ•ญํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:58
And I will always be inspired to do so by those people I encountered on Twitter,
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์ €๋Š” ํŠธ์œ„ํ„ฐ์—์„œ ๋งŒ๋‚œ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์— ์˜ํ•ด ๊ทธ๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ํ•˜๋„๋ก ํ•ญ์ƒ ๊ฒฉ๋ ค๋ฐ›์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:03
apparent enemies who became my beloved friends.
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๋ช…๋ฐฑํ•œ ์ ์—์„œ ์‚ฌ๋ž‘ํ•˜๋Š” ์นœ๊ตฌ๋“ค์ด ๋œ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด์ฃ .
09:07
And in the case of one particularly understanding and generous guy,
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ํŠน๋ณ„ํ•œ ์ผ€์ด์Šค๋กœ ์ดํ•ด์‹ฌ์žˆ๊ณ  ์ž์ƒํ•œ ๋‚จ์ž์ธ
09:10
my husband.
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์ €์˜ ๋‚จํŽธ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:12
There was nothing special about the way I responded to him.
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์ œ๊ฐ€ ๊ทธ์—๊ฒŒ ๋ณด์ธ ๋ฐ˜์‘์€ ํŠน๋ณ„ํ•œ ๊ฒƒ์ด ์•„๋ฌด๊ฒƒ๋„ ์—†์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:16
What was special was their approach.
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ํŠน๋ณ„ํ•œ ๊ฒƒ์€ ๊ทธ๋“ค์˜ ์ ‘๊ทผ ๋ฐฉ์‹์ด์—ˆ์–ด์š”.
09:19
I thought about it a lot over the past few years
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์ง€๋‚œ ์ˆ˜ ๋…„๊ฐ„ ๊ทธ๊ฒƒ์— ๋Œ€ํ•ด ์ˆ™๊ณ ํ•ด ๋ณด์•˜์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:22
and I found four things they did differently
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ๊ทธ๋“ค์˜ ๋ฐฉ์‹์—๋Š” 4๊ฐ€์ง€ ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์ ์ด ์žˆ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฑธ ๋ฐœ๊ฒฌํ–ˆ์–ด์š”.
09:25
that made real conversation possible.
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๊ทธ๊ฒƒ์ด ์ง„์ •ํ•œ ๋Œ€ํ™”๋ฅผ ๊ฐ€๋Šฅํ•˜๊ฒŒ ํ–ˆ์–ด์š”.
09:28
These four steps were small but powerful,
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์ด๋Ÿฌํ•œ 4๊ฐ€์ง€ ๋ฐฉ์‹์€ ์‚ฌ์†Œํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ๊ฐ•๋ ฅํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:31
and I do everything I can to employ them in difficult conversations today.
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์ €๋Š” ์–ด๋ ค์šด ๋Œ€ํ™”๋“ค์— ์ตœ๋Œ€ํ•œ ์ด ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•๋“ค์„ ์ ์šฉํ•˜๋ ค๊ณ  ๋…ธ๋ ฅํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:36
The first is don't assume bad intent.
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์ฒซ ๋ฒˆ์งธ๋Š” ์•…์˜๋ฅผ ์ „์ œํ•˜์ง€ ๋ง๋ผ๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:40
My friends on Twitter realized
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์ œ ํŠธ์œ„ํ„ฐ ์นœ๊ตฌ๋“ค์€
09:41
that even when my words were aggressive and offensive,
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์ œ ๋ง์ด ๊ณต๊ฒฉ์ ์ด๊ณ  ๋ชจ์š•์ ์ด์–ด๋„
09:44
I sincerely believed I was doing the right thing.
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์ €๋Š” ์ง„์‹ฌ์œผ๋กœ ์ œ๊ฐ€ ์˜ณ๋‹ค๊ณ  ์—ฌ๊ธฐ๊ณ  ์žˆ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฑธ ์•Œ๊ฒŒ ๋˜์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:47
Assuming ill motives almost instantly cuts us off
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๋‚˜์œ ๋™๊ธฐ๋ฅผ ์ „์ œํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์€ ๊ทธ ์ฆ‰์‹œ ๊ทธ๋“ค์ด ์™œ ๊ทธ๋Ÿฐ ํ–‰๋™์„ ํ•˜๊ณ 
09:50
from truly understanding why someone does and believes as they do.
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๊ทธ๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋ฏฟ๋Š”์ง€๋ฅผ ์ง„์ •์œผ๋กœ ์ดํ•ดํ•˜์ง€ ๋ชปํ•˜๊ฒŒ ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:54
We forget that they're a human being
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ๊ทธ๋“ค์ด ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด๋ž€ ๊ฒƒ์„ ์žŠ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:56
with a lifetime of experience that shaped their mind,
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์ผ์ƒ์˜ ๊ฒฝํ—˜์„ ํ†ตํ•ด ์ƒ๊ฐ์ด ํ˜•์„ฑ๋œ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด๋ผ๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์„์š”.
09:59
and we get stuck on that first wave of anger,
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์ฒซ ๋ฒˆ์งธ์— ๋Š๋ผ๋Š” ๋ถ„๋…ธ์— ๋น ์ ธ์„œ
10:02
and the conversation has a very hard time ever moving beyond it.
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๋Œ€ํ™”๊ฐ€ ์ง„์ „ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ด ํž˜๋“ค์–ด์ง‘๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:06
But when we assume good or neutral intent,
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ์„ ์˜๋‚˜ ์ค‘๋ฆฝ์ ์ธ ์˜๋„๋ฅผ ์ „์ œํ•˜๋ฉด
10:09
we give our minds a much stronger framework for dialogue.
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๋Œ€ํ™”๋ฅผ ํ–ฅํ•œ ๋”์šฑ ๊ฒฌ๊ณ ํ•œ ํ‹€์„ ์ง€๋‹Œ ๋งˆ์Œ์„ ๊ฐ€์งˆ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:13
The second is ask questions.
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๋‘ ๋ฒˆ์งธ๋Š” ์งˆ๋ฌธํ•˜๋ผ๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:17
When we engage people across ideological divides,
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์ด๋ฐ์˜ฌ๋กœ๊ธฐ๊ฐ€ ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์„ ๋Œ€ํ™”์— ์ฐธ์—ฌ์‹œํ‚ฌ ๋•Œ
10:20
asking questions helps us map the disconnect
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์งˆ๋ฌธ์„ ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์€ ์ƒ์ดํ•œ ์ž…์žฅ ๊ฐ„์˜ ๊ดด๋ฆฌ๋ฅผ
10:22
between our differing points of view.
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ํŒŒ์•…ํ•˜๋Š”๋ฐ ๋„์›€์„ ์ค๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:25
That's important because we can't present effective arguments
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ํƒ€๋ฐฉ์˜ ์ฃผ์žฅ์˜ ๊ทผ๊ฑฐ๊ฐ€ ๋ฌด์—‡์ธ์ง€ ์ดํ•ดํ•˜์ง€ ๋ชปํ•˜๋ฉด
10:27
if we don't understand where the other side is actually coming from
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ํšจ๊ณผ์ ์œผ๋กœ ์ฃผ์žฅ์„ ๊ฐœ์ง„ํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์—†๊ณ , ๊ทธ๋“ค์ด ์šฐ๋ฆฌ ์˜๊ฒฌ์˜ ์˜ค๋ฅ˜๋ฅผ
10:32
and because it gives them an opportunity to point out flaws in our positions.
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์ง€์ ํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋Š” ๊ธฐํšŒ๋ฅผ ์ฃผ๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์— ์ด ์ผ์€ ์ค‘์š”ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:36
But asking questions serves another purpose;
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์งˆ๋ฌธ์„ ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์—๋Š” ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ๋ชฉ์ ๋„ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:39
it signals to someone that they're being heard.
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์งˆ๋ฌธ์€ ํƒ€์ธ์—๊ฒŒ ๋‚ด๊ฐ€ ๊ฒฝ์ฒญํ•˜๊ณ  ์žˆ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฑธ ์•Œ๋ ค์ค๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:42
When my friends on Twitter stopped accusing
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ํŠธ์œ„ํ„ฐ ์ƒ์˜ ์ œ ์นœ๊ตฌ๋“ค์ด ๋น„๋‚œ์„ ๋ฉˆ์ถ”๊ณ 
10:44
and started asking questions,
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์ œ๊ฒŒ ์งˆ๋ฌธํ•˜๊ธฐ ์‹œ์ž‘ํ–ˆ์„ ๋•Œ,
10:46
I almost automatically mirrored them.
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์ €๋Š” ๊ฑฐ์˜ ์ž๋™์ ์œผ๋กœ ๊ทธ๋“ค์„ ๋”ฐ๋ผํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:49
Their questions gave me room to speak,
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๊ทธ๋“ค์˜ ์งˆ๋ฌธ์€ ์ œ๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•  ์—ฌ์œ ๋ฅผ ์ฃผ์—ˆ์ง€์š”,
10:51
but they also gave me permission to ask them questions
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ๊ทธ๋“ค์€ ๋˜ํ•œ ์ œ๊ฒŒ ๊ทธ๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ์งˆ๋ฌธํ•˜๊ณ ,
10:54
and to truly hear their responses.
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๊ทธ๋“ค์˜ ๋ฐ˜์‘์„ ์ง„์‹ฌ์œผ๋กœ ๊ฒฝ์ฒญํ•  ๊ธฐํšŒ๋„ ์ฃผ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:57
It fundamentally changed the dynamic of our conversation.
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๊ทธ๊ฒƒ์€ ๊ทผ๋ณธ์ ์œผ๋กœ ๋Œ€ํ™”์˜ ๊ด€๊ณ„๋ฅผ ๋ฐ”๊ฟ‰๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:02
The third is stay calm.
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์„ธ ๋ฒˆ์งธ๋Š” ์นจ์ฐฉํ•˜๋ผ๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:04
This takes practice and patience,
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์ด๊ฒƒ์€ ์—ฐ์Šต๊ณผ ์ธ๋‚ด๋ฅผ ํ•„์š”๋กœ ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:06
but it's powerful.
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ๊ฐ•๋ ฅํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:08
At Westboro, I learned not to care how my manner of speaking affected others.
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์›จ์ŠคํŠธ๋ณด๋กœ์—์„œ ์ œ๊ฐ€ ๋งํ•˜๋Š” ๋ฐฉ์‹๋•Œ๋ฌธ์— ๋‚จ์ด ์ƒ์ฒ˜๋ฐ›๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์—
์‹ ๊ฒฝ์“ฐ์ง€ ๋ง๋ผ๊ณ  ๋ฐฐ์› ์–ด์š”.
11:12
I thought my rightness justified my rudeness --
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์ €๋Š” ์ œ ์ฃผ์žฅ์˜ ์ •๋‹น์„ฑ์ด ๋ฌด๋ก€ํ•จ์„ ์ •๋‹นํ™”ํ•ด์ฃผ๋Š” ์ค„ ์•Œ์•˜์–ด์š”.
11:15
harsh tones, raised voices, insults, interruptions --
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๋ƒ‰ํ˜นํ•œ ์–ด์กฐ, ๊ฒฉ์•™๋œ ๋ชฉ์†Œ๋ฆฌ, ๋ชจ์š•, ๋ง ๋Š๊ธฐ...
11:19
but that strategy is ultimately counterproductive.
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ๊ทธ๋Ÿฐ ์ „๋žต์€ ๊ถ๊ทน์ ์œผ๋กœ ์—ญํšจ๊ณผ๋ฅผ ๋‚ณ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:22
Dialing up the volume and the snark is natural in stressful situations,
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์–ธ์„ฑ์„ ๋†’์ด๊ณ  ๋น„๋‚œํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์€ ์ŠคํŠธ๋ ˆ์Šค๋ฅผ ๋ฐ›๋Š” ์ƒํ™ฉ์—์„œ๋Š” ์ž์—ฐ์Šค๋Ÿฌ์šด ๊ฒ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:26
but it tends to bring the conversation to an unsatisfactory, explosive end.
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ๋Œ€ํ™”๊ฐ€ ๋งŒ์กฑ์Šค๋Ÿฝ์ง€ ์•Š๊ฒŒ, ๊ฐ์ •์ด ๊ฒฉํ•ด์ ธ์„œ ๋๋‚˜๊ฒŒ ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:32
When my husband was still just an anonymous Twitter acquaintance,
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์ €์˜ ๋‚จํŽธ์ด ์•„์ง ์ต๋ช…์˜ ํŠธ์œ„ํ„ฐ ์นœ๊ตฌ์˜€์„ ๋•Œ
11:35
our discussions frequently became hard and pointed,
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ์˜ ํ† ๋ก ์€ ์ž์ฃผ ์‹ ๋ž„ํ•˜๊ณ  ๋‚ ์ด ์„œ ์žˆ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:38
but we always refused to escalate.
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ํ•ญ์ƒ ๊ฒฉ์•™๋˜์ง€ ์•Š์œผ๋ ค๊ณ  ํ•˜๋ฉด์„œ
11:41
Instead, he would change the subject.
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๊ทธ ๋Œ€์‹  ์ฃผ์ œ๋ฅผ ๋ฐ”๊ฟจ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:43
He would tell a joke or recommend a book
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๊ทธ๋Š” ๋†๋‹ด์„ ํ•˜๊ฑฐ๋‚˜ ์ฑ…์„ ์ถ”์ฒœํ•˜๊ณค ํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:45
or gently excuse himself from the conversation.
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์•„๋‹ˆ๋ฉด ์˜ˆ์˜๋ฐ”๋ฅด๊ฒŒ ๋Œ€ํ™”๋ฅผ ๋๋ƒˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:49
We knew the discussion wasn't over,
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ํ† ๋ก ์ด ๋๋‚˜์ง€ ์•Š์€ ๊ฒƒ์„ ์•Œ์•˜๊ณ 
11:51
just paused for a time to bring us back to an even keel.
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์ž ์‹œ ๋ฉˆ์ถ”์–ด์„œ ์•ˆ์ •์„ ๋˜์ฐพ์•˜์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:55
People often lament that digital communication makes us less civil,
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์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์€ ๋””์ง€ํ„ธ ์ปค๋ฎค๋‹ˆ์ผ€์ด์…˜์ด ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋ฅผ ๋” ์˜ˆ์˜์—†๊ฒŒ ๋งŒ๋“ ๋‹ค๊ณ  ํ•œํƒ„ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ
11:58
but this is one advantage that online conversations have over in-person ones.
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์ด๊ฒƒ์€ ์˜จ๋ผ์ธ ๋Œ€ํ™”๊ฐ€ ๋Œ€๋ฉด์ ์ธ ๋Œ€ํ™”์— ๋น„ํ•ด ์ง€๋‹ˆ๋Š” ์žฅ์ ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
12:03
We have a buffer of time and space
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋ฅผ ์งœ์ฆ๋‚˜๊ฒŒ ํ•˜๋Š” ์ƒ๊ฐ์„ ๊ฐ€์ง„ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๊ณผ์˜ ์‚ฌ์ด์—
12:06
between us and the people whose ideas we find so frustrating.
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์‹œ๊ฐ„๊ณผ ๊ณต๊ฐ„์˜ ์™„์ถฉ ์žฅ์น˜๋ฅผ ๊ฐ€์ง€๊ณ  ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
12:10
We can use that buffer.
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ๊ทธ ์™„์ถฉ ์žฅ์น˜๋ฅผ ์‚ฌ์šฉํ•ด์„œ
12:12
Instead of lashing out, we can pause, breathe,
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๋น„๋‚œํ•˜๋Š” ๋Œ€์‹ ์— ์ž ์‹œ ๋ฉˆ์ถ”์–ด ํ˜ธํก์„ ๊ฐ€๋‹ค๋“ฌ๊ณ 
12:15
change the subject or walk away,
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์ฃผ์ œ๋ฅผ ๋ฐ”๊พธ๊ฑฐ๋‚˜ ๋Œ€ํ™”์—์„œ ๋– ๋‚  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
12:18
and then come back to it when we're ready.
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์ค€๋น„๋˜์—ˆ์„ ๋•Œ ๋Œ์•„์™€์„œ
12:22
And finally ...
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๋‹ค์‹œ ์ฃผ์žฅ์„
12:24
make the argument.
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ํŽผ์น  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
12:27
This might seem obvious,
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๋ป”ํ•œ ์ด์•ผ๊ธฐ ๊ฐ™์ง€๋งŒ
12:29
but one side effect of having strong beliefs
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๊ฐ•ํ•œ ์‹ ๋…์„ ๊ฐ€์ง€๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์˜ ํ•œ ๊ฐ€์ง€ ๋ถ€์ž‘์šฉ์€
12:31
is that we sometimes assume
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๋•Œ๋–„๋กœ ๋‚ด ์˜๊ฒฌ์˜ ๊ฐ€์น˜๊ฐ€
12:33
that the value of our position is or should be obvious and self-evident,
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๋ช…๋ฐฑํ•˜๊ณ  ์ž๋ช…ํ•˜๋‹ค๊ณ , ๋˜๋Š” ๊ทธ๋ž˜์•ผํ•œ๋‹ค๊ณ  ๋‹น์—ฐํ•˜๊ฒŒ ์ƒ๊ฐํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
12:38
that we shouldn't have to defend our positions
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๋‚ด ์ž…์žฅ์„ ๋ณ€ํ˜ธํ•ด์•ผ ํ•  ํ•„์š”๊ฐ€ ์—†์–ด์•ผ ํ•œ๋‹ค๊ณ  ์ƒ๊ฐํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ด์ฃ .
12:40
because they're so clearly right and good
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๋„ˆ๋ฌด๋„ ๋ถ„๋ช…ํ•˜๊ฒŒ ์˜ณ๊ณ  ์ข‹์•„์„œ
12:43
that if someone doesn't get it, it's their problem --
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๋ˆ„๊ตฐ๊ฐ€๊ฐ€ ์ดํ•ดํ•˜์ง€ ๋ชปํ•œ๋‹ค๋ฉด ๊ทธ๊ฑด ๊ทธ๋“ค์˜ ๋ฌธ์ œ์ด์ง€
12:46
that it's not my job to educate them.
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๋‚ด๊ฐ€ ๊ฐ€๋ฅด์ณ์ฃผ์–ด์•ผ ํ•  ์ผ์ด ์•„๋‹ˆ๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
12:49
But if it were that simple,
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๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ๋‚˜ ๋งŒ์•ฝ ๊ทธ๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๊ฐ„๋‹จํ•˜๋‹ค๋ฉด
12:50
we would all see things the same way.
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ๋ชจ๋“  ๊ฑธ ๋˜‘๊ฐ™์ด ๋ณด๊ฒ ์ฃ .
12:53
As kind as my friends on Twitter were,
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ํŠธ์œ„ํ„ฐ์˜ ์ œ ์นœ๊ตฌ๋“ค์€ ์นœ์ ˆํ•ด์„œ
12:55
if they hadn't actually made their arguments,
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๋งŒ์•ฝ ๊ทธ๋“ค์ด ์ž์‹ ์˜ ์ฃผ์žฅ์„ ๊ฐœ์ง„ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์•˜๋‹ค๋ฉด
12:58
it would've been so much harder for me to see the world in a different way.
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์ œ๊ฐ€ ์„ธ์ƒ์„ ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ๋ฐฉ์‹์œผ๋กœ ๋ณด๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์€ ๋”์šฑ ํž˜๋“ค์—ˆ์„ ๊ฒ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
13:02
We are all a product of our upbringing,
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ๋ชจ๋‘ ์ž์‹ ์ด ๋ฐ›์€ ๊ฐ€๋ฅด์นจ์˜ ์‚ฐ๋ฌผ์ด๊ณ 
13:05
and our beliefs reflect our experiences.
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ์˜ ์‹ ๋…์€ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ์˜ ๊ฒฝํ—˜์„ ๋ฐ˜์˜ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
13:08
We can't expect others to spontaneously change their own minds.
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๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด ๋‹จ๋ฒˆ์— ๊ทธ๋“ค์ด ์ƒ๊ฐ์„ ๋ฐ”๊พธ๊ธธ ๊ธฐ๋Œ€ํ•  ์ˆœ ์—†์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
13:12
If we want change,
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๋ณ€ํ™”๋ฅผ ์›ํ•œ๋‹ค๋ฉด
13:13
we have to make the case for it.
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๊ทธ๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋˜๊ฒŒ ๋งŒ๋“ค์–ด์•ผ ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
13:16
My friends on Twitter didn't abandon their beliefs or their principles --
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์ œ ํŠธ์œ„ํ„ฐ ์นœ๊ตฌ๋“ค์„ ๊ทธ๋“ค์˜ ์‹ ๋…๊ณผ ์›์น™์„ ๋ฒ„๋ฆฌ์ง€ ์•Š์•˜์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
13:21
only their scorn.
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๊ฒฝ๋ฉธ๋งŒ ๋ฒ„๋ ธ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
13:23
They channeled their infinitely justifiable offense
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๊ทธ๋“ค์€ ๋งค์šฐ ์ •๋‹นํ•œ ๋ชจ์š•์„ ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ๊ณณ์œผ๋กœ ๋Œ๋ฆฌ๊ณ 
13:26
and came to me with pointed questions tempered with kindness and humor.
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์นœ์ ˆ๊ณผ ์œ ๋จธ๊ฐ€ ๊ฐ€๋ฏธ๋œ ๋‚ ์นด๋กœ์šด ์งˆ๋ฌธ์„ ๊ฐ€์ง€๊ณ  ์™”์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
13:31
They approached me as a human being,
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๊ทธ๋“ค์€ ์ €๋ฅผ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์œผ๋กœ ๋Œ€ํ•˜๋ฉฐ ์ ‘๊ทผํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
13:33
and that was more transformative
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์ˆ˜์‹ญ ๋…„ ๊ฐ„์˜ ๋ถ„๋…ธ์™€
13:35
than two full decades of outrage, disdain and violence.
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๊ฒฝ๋ฉธ๊ณผ ํญ๋ ฅ์ด ๊ฐ€์ ธ์˜จ ๊ฒƒ๋ณด๋‹ค ๋” ๋งŽ์€ ๋ณ€ํ™”๋ฅผ ๊ฐ€์ ธ์™”์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
13:40
I know that some might not have the time or the energy or the patience
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์˜ค๋ž˜ ํ† ๋ก ํ•  ์‹œ๊ฐ„์ด๋‚˜ ํž˜์ด๋‚˜ ์ธ๋‚ด์‹ฌ์ด ์—†๋Š” ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋„
13:44
for extensive engagement,
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์žˆ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฑฐ ์•Œ์•„์š”.
13:45
but as difficult as it can be,
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์–ด๋ ค์›Œ๋„
13:47
reaching out to someone we disagree with
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์ œ ์˜๊ฒฌ์— ๋ฐ˜๋Œ€ํ•˜๋Š” ๋ˆ„๊ตฐ๊ฐ€์—๊ฒŒ ๋‹ค๊ฐ€๊ฐ„๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฑด
13:50
is an option that is available to all of us.
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ ๋ชจ๋‘์—๊ฒŒ ์—ด๋ ค์žˆ๋Š” ์„ ํƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
13:53
And I sincerely believe that we can do hard things,
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์ €๋Š” ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ์–ด๋ ค์šด ์ผ์„ ํ•ด๋‚ผ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋‹ค๊ณ  ๋ฏฟ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
13:56
not just for them but for us and our future.
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๊ทธ๋“ค์„ ์œ„ํ•ด์„œ๋งŒ์ด ์•„๋‹ˆ๋ผ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ์™€ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ ๋ฏธ๋ž˜๋ฅผ ์œ„ํ•ด์„œ ๋ง์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
14:00
Escalating disgust and intractable conflict
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๊ฒฉ์•™๋˜๋Š” ํ˜์˜ค์™€ ๋งŒ์„ฑ์ ์ธ ๊ฐˆ๋“ฑ์€
14:02
are not what we want for ourselves,
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋‚˜ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ์˜ ๊ตญ๊ฐ€๋‚˜ ๋‹ค์Œ ์„ธ๋Œ€๊ฐ€ ๋ฐ”๋ผ๋Š” ๊ฒŒ ์•„๋‹™๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
14:04
or our country
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14:06
or our next generation.
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14:09
My mom said something to me a few weeks before I left Westboro,
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์ €ํฌ ์–ด๋จธ๋‹ˆ๋Š” ์ œ๊ฐ€ ์›จ์ŠคํŠธ๋ณด๋กœ๋ฅผ ๋– ๋‚˜๊ธฐ ๋ช‡ ์ฃผ ์ „์— ์ œ๊ฒŒ ๋ง์”€ํ•˜์…จ์–ด์š”.
14:13
when I was desperately hoping
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์ œ๊ฐ€ ๊ฐ€์กฑ๊ณผ ๊ฐ™์ด ์žˆ์„ ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์ด
14:15
there was a way I could stay with my family.
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์žˆ์—ˆ์œผ๋ฉด ์ข‹๊ฒ ๋‹ค๊ณ  ๊ฐ„์ ˆํžˆ ๋ฐ”๋ž„ ๋•Œ์˜€์ฃ .
14:18
People I have loved with every pulse of my heart
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๊ฐ€์กฑ์€ ์ œ๊ฐ€ ๋งˆ์Œ์„ ๋‹คํ•ด ์‚ฌ๋ž‘ํ•˜๋Š” ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด์—ˆ์–ด์š”.
14:21
since even before I was that chubby-cheeked five-year-old,
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์ œ๊ฐ€ ํ‰ํ‰ํ•œ ๋นฐ์„ ๊ฐ€์ง„ 5์‚ด ์•„๊ธฐ์ด๊ธฐ ์ „๋ถ€ํ„ฐ,
14:24
standing on a picket line holding a sign I couldn't read.
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์ฝ์ง€๋„ ๋ชปํ•˜๋Š” ํ”ผ์ผ“์„ ๋“ค๊ณ  ํ”ผ์ผ“๋ผ์ธ์— ์„œ์žˆ์—ˆ์„ ๋•Œ๋ณด๋‹ค ์ „๋ถ€ํ„ฐ์š”.
14:27
She said, "You're just a human being,
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์—„๋งˆ๋Š” ๋งํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. "๋„ˆ๋Š” ๊ทธ์ € ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ผ ๋ฟ์ด์•ผ,
14:30
my dear, sweet child."
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๋‚ด ์‚ฌ๋ž‘ํ•˜๋Š” ์•„๊ฐ€์•ผ."
14:33
She was asking me to be humble --
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๊ทธ๋…€๋Š” ์ œ๊ฒŒ ๊ฒธ์†ํ•˜๋ผ๊ณ  ๋ถ€ํƒํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
14:35
not to question but to trust God and my elders.
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์งˆ๋ฌธํ•˜์ง€ ๋ง๊ณ  ์‹ ๊ณผ ์–ด๋ฅธ๋“ค์„ ๋ฏฟ์œผ๋ผ๊ณ ์š”.
14:39
But to me, she was missing the bigger picture --
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์ œ๊ฐ€ ๋ณด๊ธฐ์— ์—„๋งˆ๋Š” ๋” ํฐ ๊ทธ๋ฆผ์„ ๋†“์น˜๊ณ  ์žˆ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
14:43
that we're all just human beings.
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ ๋ชจ๋‘๊ฐ€ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด๋ผ๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์„์š”.
14:45
That we should be guided by that most basic fact,
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ๊ฐ€์žฅ ๊ธฐ๋ณธ์ ์ธ ์‚ฌ์‹ค์— ์˜ํ•ด ์ธ๋„๋˜์–ด์•ผ ํ•˜๊ณ ,
14:48
and approach one another with generosity and compassion.
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๊ด€๋Œ€ํ•จ๊ณผ ์• ์ •์„ ๊ฐ€์ง€๊ณ  ์„œ๋กœ์—๊ฒŒ ๋‹ค๊ฐ€๊ฐ€์•ผ ํ•œ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์„์š”.
14:52
Each one of us contributes to the communities
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ ๋ชจ๋‘๋Š” ๊ฐ์ž ์ž์‹ ์ด ์†ํ•œ ๊ณต๋™์ฒด์™€
14:54
and the cultures and the societies that we make up.
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ๊ตฌ์„ฑํ•˜๋Š” ๋ฌธํ™”์™€ ์‚ฌํšŒ์— ๊ธฐ์—ฌํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
14:57
The end of this spiral of rage and blame begins with one person
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๋ถ„๋…ธ์™€ ๋น„๋‚œ์˜ ์†Œ์šฉ๋Œ์ด์˜ ์ข…๋ง์€ ํŒŒ๊ดด์ ์ด๊ณ  ์œ ํ˜น์ ์ธ ์ถฉ๋™์—
15:02
who refuses to indulge these destructive, seductive impulses.
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๋น ์ง€๋Š” ๊ฑธ ๊ฑฐ๋ถ€ํ•˜๋Š” ํ•œ ๋ช…์˜ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์œผ๋กœ๋ถ€ํ„ฐ ์‹œ์ž‘๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
15:07
We just have to decide that it's going to start with us.
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๊ทธ ์‹œ์ž‘์ด ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ๋˜๊ธฐ๋กœ ๊ฒฐ์‹ฌํ•˜๋ฉด ๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
15:10
Thank you.
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๊ฐ์‚ฌํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
15:12
(Applause)
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(๋ฐ•์ˆ˜)
์ด ์›น์‚ฌ์ดํŠธ ์ •๋ณด

์ด ์‚ฌ์ดํŠธ๋Š” ์˜์–ด ํ•™์Šต์— ์œ ์šฉํ•œ YouTube ๋™์˜์ƒ์„ ์†Œ๊ฐœํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์ „ ์„ธ๊ณ„ ์ตœ๊ณ ์˜ ์„ ์ƒ๋‹˜๋“ค์ด ๊ฐ€๋ฅด์น˜๋Š” ์˜์–ด ์ˆ˜์—…์„ ๋ณด๊ฒŒ ๋  ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๊ฐ ๋™์˜์ƒ ํŽ˜์ด์ง€์— ํ‘œ์‹œ๋˜๋Š” ์˜์–ด ์ž๋ง‰์„ ๋”๋ธ” ํด๋ฆญํ•˜๋ฉด ๊ทธ๊ณณ์—์„œ ๋™์˜์ƒ์ด ์žฌ์ƒ๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๋น„๋””์˜ค ์žฌ์ƒ์— ๋งž์ถฐ ์ž๋ง‰์ด ์Šคํฌ๋กค๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์˜๊ฒฌ์ด๋‚˜ ์š”์ฒญ์ด ์žˆ๋Š” ๊ฒฝ์šฐ ์ด ๋ฌธ์˜ ์–‘์‹์„ ์‚ฌ์šฉํ•˜์—ฌ ๋ฌธ์˜ํ•˜์‹ญ์‹œ์˜ค.

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