An astronaut's story of curiosity, perspective and change | Leland Melvin

Prevoditelj: Helena Marković Recezent: Sanda L

[This talk contains mature content]

[Govor uključuje sadržaj za odrasle]

In 1969, I was standing behind

Godine 1969. stajao sam iza

a Sylvania black-and-white television set.

starog crno-bijelog televizijskog seta,

Hearing about these things happening on the set in the front,

slušajući o stvarima koje su se događale na televizoru ispred.

I was the guy, you know,

Ja sam bio taj, znate,

moving the rabbit ears for my dad, and my sister and my mom.

koji je pomicao antenu za moga oca, za sestru i mamu.

"Move over here, turn over here, move this way, we can't see the screen."

"Pomakni ovdje, okreni tamo, makni na onu stranu, ne vidimo ekran."

And what they were watching

A ono što su gledali

was: "One small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind."

bilo je: "Ovo je mali korak za čovjeka, ali veliki skok za čovječanstvo."

Neil [Armstrong] and Buzz Aldrin were walking on the Moon.

Neil [Armstrong] i Buzz Aldrin šetali su po Mjesecu.

And I was five years old in Lynchburg, Virginia,

A ja sam bio petogodišnjak iz Lynchburga u Virginiji,

a skinny black kid in a kind of somewhat racist town.

mršavi crni dječak u pomalo rasističkom gradiću.

And I was trying to figure out what I was going to do with my life.

I pokušavao sam shvatiti što ću učiniti sa svojim životom.

And my parents, you know, they were educators,

A moji su roditelji, znate, bili učitelji,

they'd said that you can do anything.

rekli su da možeš učiniti bilo što.

But after that moon landing, all the kids in the neighborhood

No nakon slijetanja na Mjesec, sva djeca u susjedstvu

were like, "You're going to be an astronaut?"

su govorila: "Hoćeš li biti astronaut?"

I'm like, "No."

A ja bih rekao: "Ne."

I don't want a buzz cut, and I don't see someone who looks like me.

Ne želim biti kratko ošišan, a i ne vidim nekoga tko izgleda kao ja.

Because representation does matter.

Jer zastupljenost je zaista važna.

And I knew that there was a guy

Znao sam za jednog dečka,

five blocks down the street on Pierce Street

pet blokova kuća niz ulicu iz ulice Pierce,

who was training to play tennis.

koji je trenirao tenis.

And it was Arthur Ashe.

Zvao se Arhur Ashe.

And my dad talked about his character, his discipline,

Moj je otac govorio o njegovom karakteru i disciplini,

his intelligence, his athleticism.

njegovoj inteligenciji i kondiciji.

I wanted to be Arthur Ashe,

Ja sam htio biti Arhur Ashe,

I didn't want to be one of those moon guys.

nisam želio biti jedan od onih astronauta.

And as I went on through this journey,

I kako sam prolazio kroz ovo iskustvo,

my dad, who was a school teacher, he played in a band,

moj otac, koji je bio učitelj u školi, svirao je u bendu,

he did all these things to make money for my sister and I

radio je mnogo stvari da zaradi novac za moju sestru i mene

to take piano lessons

da učimo svirati klavir

and do these different things with education.

i radimo različite stvari za obrazovanje.

And he one day decides to drive up into the driveway with this bread truck.

I jednog dana odlučio je doći kući nekakvim pekarskim kombijem.

And I'm thinking, "OK, bread truck,

A ja sam mislio: "U redu, pekarski kombi,

me delivering bread while my dad's driving the truck."

ja dostavljam kruh dok moj otac vozi kombi."

I'm like, "OK, I'm going to be a bread guy now."

Mislio sam: "Izgleda da ću biti dostavljač kruha."

But he says, "This is our camper."

Ali on je rekao: "Ovo je naš kamper."

I'm like, "Dude, come one, I can read: 'Merita Bread and Rolls'

A ja mu kažem: "Ajde, mogu pročitati 'Merita kruh i peciva',

on the side of this truck.

piše sa strane ovog kombija.

And he says, "No, we're going to build this into our camper."

A on mi reče: "Ne, od ovog ćemo napraviti naš kamper."

And over that summer, we rewired the entire electrical system.

I tijekom tog ljeta, prespojili smo cijeli električni sustav.

We plumbed a propane tank to a Coleman stove,

Spojili smo spremnik za propan s Coleman peći,

we built bunk beds that flip down.

sagradili smo krevete na kat s preklopom nadolje.

We were turning this into our summer vacation launch pad, escape pod,

Pretvarali smo ga u kapsulu za spas tijekom ljetnog odmora,

this thing that could take us out of Lynchburg.

u stvar koja nas može izvući iz Lynchburga.

And before that,

A prije toga,

I was actually raped at five by some neighbors.

zapravo su me silovali susjedi kada sam imao pet godina.

And I didn't tell anyone,

Nisam rekao nikome,

because I had friends that didn't have fathers.

jer sam imao prijatelja koji nisu imali očeve.

And I knew that my father

A znao sam da bi moj otac

would have killed the people that did that to his son.

ubio ljude koji su to učinili njegovom sinu.

And I didn't want my father to be gone.

A nisam želio da mi otac bude odveden.

So as we got in this bread truck and escaped from Lynchburg,

Dakle, kad smo ušli u ovaj pekarski kamion i pobjegli iz Lynchburga,

it was my time with my dad.

bilo je to moje vrijeme s ocem.

And we went to the Smoky Mountains

Otišli smo do nacionalnog parka Smoky Mountains

and looked at the purple mountains' majesty.

i gledali njegovu ljubičastu veličanstvenost.

And we walked along the beach in Myrtle Beach,

I šetali smo plažom u Myrtle Beachu,

and this thing was transformative.

to je bilo transformativno iskustvo.

It showed me what it meant to be an explorer, at a very early age.

Pokazalo mi je što to znači biti istraživač, u vrlo mladoj dobi.

And I suppressed all that negativity,

A ja sam potisnuo svu tu negativnost,

all that trauma,

svu tu traumu,

because I was learning to be an explorer.

zato što sam učio kako biti istraživač.

And a little bit later, my mother gave me an age-inappropriate,

A malo kasnije, moja majka mi je dala, neprikladan za moju dob,

non-OSHA-certified chemistry set,

ne baš posve siguran set za kemiju,

(Laughter)

(Smijeh)

where I created the most incredible explosion in her living room.

kojim sam izveo nevjerojatne eksplozije u njenoj dnevnoj sobi.

(Laughter)

(Smijeh)

And so I knew I could be a chemist.

Tako sam znao da mogu biti kemičar.

So as I went on this journey through a high school,

I tako sam krenuo na putovanje kroz srednju školu,

and I went to college,

upisao sam fakultet

and I got a football scholarship to play football in college.

i dobio stipendiju za igranje američkog nogometa na fakultetu.

And I knew that I could be a chemist, because I'd already blown stuff up.

A znao sam da mogu biti kemičar, jer sam već prije raznio neke stvari.

(Laughter)

(Smijeh)

And when I graduated,

I kada sam diplomirao,

I got drafted to the Detroit Lions.

pozvan sam u momčad Detroit Lions.

But I pulled a hamstring in training camp,

Ali ozlijedio sam tetivu u kampu za treninge

and so what every former NFL player does, they go work for NASA, right?

i tako, što svaki bivši sportaš učini, ode raditi za NASA-u, zar ne?

So I went to work for NASA.

Zato sam otišao u NASA-u.

(Laughter)

(Smijeh)

And this friend of mine said, "Leland, you'd be great astronaut."

Prijatelj mi je rekao: "Lelande, ti bi bio odličan astronaut."

I just laughed at him, I was like, "Yeah, me, an astronaut?"

Samo sam se nasmijao i rekao: "Da baš, ja, astronaut?"

You know that Neil and Buzz thing from back in '69?

Sjećaš li se Neila i Buzza, onoga iz 1969.?

And he handed me an application, and I looked at it,

I predao mi je prijavu, pogledao sam je,

and I didn't fill it out.

ali je nisam ispunio.

And that same year, another friend of mine filled out the application

A te iste godine, još je jedan moj prijatelj ispunio prijavu

and he got in.

i primili su ga.

And I said to myself,

Rekao sam sam sebi:

"If NASA's letting knuckleheads like that be astronauts,"

"Ako NASA prima takve tupane za astronaute,"

(Laughter)

(Smijeh)

"maybe I can be one, too."

"možda i ja to mogu postati."

So the next selection, I filled out the application, and I got in.

Dakle, idući put sam ispunio prijavu i primili su me.

And I didn't know what it meant to be an astronaut:

Nisam znao što to točno znači biti astronaut:

the training, the simulations,

treninzi, simulacije,

all these things to get you ready for this countdown:

sve te stvari koje te pripremaju za ovo odbrojavanje:

three, two, one, liftoff.

tri, dva, jedan, polijetanje.

And in 2007, I was in Space Shuttle "Atlantis," careening off the planet,

A 2007. sam u Space Shuttleu "Atlantida" odmicao od planeta,

traveling at 17,500 miles per hour.

putujući brzinom od 28.165 kilometara na sat.

And eight and a half minutes later,

Osam i pol minuta kasnije,

the main engines cut off, and we're now floating in space.

glavni motori prestaju raditi i sada plutamo kroz svemir.

And I push off and float over to the window,

Odgurnuo sam se i doplutao do prozora

and I can see the Caribbean.

te sam mogao vidjeti Karibe.

And I need new definitions of blue to describe the colors that I see.

Trebala mi je nova definicija plave da opišem boje koje vidim.

Azure, indigo, navy blue, medium navy blue, turquoise

Azurna, indigo, mornarsko plava, srednje mornarsko plava, tirkizna

don't do any justice to what I see with my eyes.

ne dočaravaju dovoljno ono što sam vidio.

And my job on this mission was to install

Moj posao u toj misiji bio je da instaliram

this two-billion dollar Columbus laboratory.

dvije milijarde dolara vrijedan laboratorij Columbus.

It was a research laboratory

To je laboratorij za istraživanje,

for materials research, for human research.

za istraživanje materijala, za ljudska istraživanja.

And I reached into the payload bay of the space shuttle,

Posegnuo sam u Space Shuttleov prostor za teret,

grabbed out this big module,

zgrabio sam jedan veliki modul

and I used the robotic arm and I attached it to the space station.

i koristio robotsku ruku da ga pričvrstim za svemirsku postaju.

And the European team have been waiting 10 years for this thing to get installed,

Europski tim čekao je 10 godina da se ta stvar instalira

so I'm sure everyone in Europe was like, "Leland! Leland! Leland!"

pa su sigurno svi u Europi navijali: "Leland! Leland! Leland!"

(Laughter)

(Smijeh)

And so this moment happened, this was our primary mission objective,

Tako se dogodio taj trenutak, to je bio primarni cilj naše misije,

it was done.

bilo je gotovo.

And I had this big sigh of relief.

Duboko sam odahnuo.

But then, Peggy Whitson, the first female commander,

No tada, Peggy Whitson, prva žena kao zapovjednik,

she invited us over to the Russian segment.

pozvala nas je do ruskog dijela postaje.

And the space station's about the size of a football field,

A svemirska je postaja veličine nogometnog terena,

with solar panel and trusses and all of these modules.

sa solarnim panelima, rešetkama i svim tim modulima.

And she says, "Leland, you go get the rehydrated vegetables,

Onda je rekla: "Lelande, ti odi i uzmi rehidrirano povrće,

we have the meat."

mi imamo meso."

So we float over with the bag of vegetables, all rehydrated,

Tako smo plutali s torbom povrća, sve rehidrirano,

and we get there.

i otišli smo tamo.

And there's this moment

Tada se dogodio trenutak

where I get [transported] back to my mother's kitchen.

koji me vratio u kuhinju moje majke.

You can smell the beef and barley heating up,

Možeš namirisati govedinu i ječam kako se krčkaju,

you can smell the food, the colors,

možeš namirisati hranu, boje,

and there are people there from all around the world.

a tu su svi ti ljudi iz cijelog svijeta.

It's like a Benetton commercial,

Kao u reklami za Benetton,

you know, you have African American, Asian American, French, German, Russian,

znate, tu su Afroamerikanac, Azijat, Francuz, Nijemac, Rus,

the first female commander,

prva žena zapovjednik,

breaking bread at 17,500 miles per hour,

koji jedu putujući brzinom od 28.165 kilometara na sat,

going around the planet every 90 minutes,

obilazeći planet svakih 90 minuta,

seeing a sunrise and a sunset every 45.

gledajući izlazak i zalazak sunca svakih 45 minuta.

And Peggy would say, "Hey, Leland, try some of this,"

Peggy je rekla: "Hej, Lelande, probaj malo ovog,"

and she'd float it over to my mouth,

gurnula je hranu prema mojim ustima,

and I'd catch it and we'd go back and forth.

uhvatio sam pa smo si naizmjenično slali hranu.

And we're doing all of this while listening to Sade's "Smooth Operator."

Sve smo to radili slušajući pjesmu Sade "Smooth Operator".

(Laughter)

(Smijeh)

I mean, this is like blowing my mind, you know.

Mislim, to mi je fascinantno, znate.

(Laughter)

(Smijeh)

And I float over to the window, and I look down at the planet,

Doplutao sam do prozora, pogledao dolje prema planetu

and I see all of humanity.

i vidio cijelo čovječanstvo.

And my perspective changes at that moment,

Moja se perspektiva tada promijenila,

because, I'm flying over Lynchburg, Virginia, my home town,

zato što sam letio iznad Lyncburga, mog rodnog mjesta,

and my family's probably breaking bread.

a moja je obitelj vjerojatno isto jela.

And five minutes later, we're flying over Paris,

Pet minuta kasnije, letjeli smo iznad Pariza,

where Leo Eyharts is looking down at his parents,

gdje Leo Eyharts gleda dolje svoje roditelje,

probably having some wine and cheese,

koji vjerojatno jedu malo sira i vina,

and Yuri's looking off to Moscow,

a Yuri gleda prema Moskvi,

and they're probably eating borscht or something else.

gdje vjerojatno jedu boršč ili nešto slično.

But we're all having this moment where we see our respective families

Ali svi smo imali taj trenutak kada smo vidjeli svoje obitelji

working together as one civilization,

koje zajedno rade kao jedna civilizacija,

at 17,500 miles per hour.

putujući brzinom od 28.165 kilometara na sat.

My perspective shifted cognitively,

Moja se perspektiva koginitivno promijenila,

it changed me.

to me promijenilo.

And when I think about being that little skinny boy,

I kada se sjetim da sam bio taj mršavi mali dječak,

from sometimes racist Lynchburg, Virginia,

iz pomalo rasističkog Lynchburga u Viriginiji,

I would never have had that perspective

nikada ne bih imao tu perspektivu

to think about myself of being an astronaut,

misliti o sebi kao o astronautu,

if my father hadn't taken us on a journey

da nas moj otac nije odveo na putovanje

in this radical craft that we built with our own two hands.

u tom radikalnom vozilu koje smo izgradili vlastitim rukama.

When I came home,

Kada sam došao kući,

I realized that perspective is something

shvatio sam da je ta perspektiva nešto

that we all get and we all have.

što svi dobijemo i svi imamo.

It's just how far do we open up our blinders

Pitanje je samo koliko ćemo široko razmaknuti povez

to see that shift and that change.

da vidimo tu promjenu.

And going back to the space station,

A što se tiče svemirske postaje,

I think of, you know, Germans and Russians fighting Americans.

mislim na, znate, Nijemce i Ruse koji se bore protiv Amerikanaca.

We have these people living and working together.

Na jednom su mjestu ljudi koji žive i rade zajedno.

White folks, black folks, Russian folks, French folks, you know.

Bijelci, crnci, Rusi, Francuzi, znate.

All these different people coexisting in harmony as one race.

Svi ti drukčiji ljudi koji žive u harmoniji kao jedna rasa.

And I think about the colors that I saw, the design of the modules,

Mislim i o bojama koje sam vidio, o dizajnu modula,

the way that things fit together,

načinu na koji se stvari poklapaju,

the way that it made us a community, our home.

načinu zbog kojeg smo bili zajednica, stvorili dom.

And so when I look up to space now,

Tako da kada sad pogledam gore u svemir,

and I have this newfound perspective

uz svoju novu perspektivu

on the space station going overhead and looking there,

i pogledam svemirsku postaju koja je gore, gledajući u nju

and then looking back at my community

te potom gledajući moju zajednicu

and seeing the people that I'm living and working with,

i vidim ljude s kojima radim i živim,

and coexisting with,

i u suživotu sam s njima,

I think it's something that we all can do now, especially in these times,

mislim da je to nešto što sada svi možemo, pogotovo sada,

to make sure that we have the right perspective.

da budemo sigurni da imamo pravu perspektivu.

Thank you.

Hvala vam.

(Applause)

(Pljesak)

Chee Pearlman: If you don't mind, could I just chat with you for a minute,

Chee Pearlaman: Ako Vam ne smeta, možemo li kratko popričati?

because they're going to set up some things here.

Jer oni će postaviti neke stvari ovdje.

And I get to have you all to myself, OK.

A ja Vas imam samo za sebe.

Leland Melvin: Alright.

Leland Melvin: U redu.

CP: You guys don't get to hear this.

CP: Vi nećete imati priliku ovo čuti.

So I have to tell you

Dakle, moram Vam reći

that in my family, we watch a lot of space movies

da u mojoj obitelji gledamo puno filmova o svemiru,

about astronauts and stuff like that.

o astronautima i takvim stvarima.

I can't tell you why, but we do.

Ne mogu Vam reći zašto, ali to radimo.

(Laughter)

(Smijeh)

The thing that I wanted to ask you, though,

Stvar koju Vas želim pitati, doduše,

is that we were seeing this movie the other day,

je da smo gledali jedan film prije nekog vremena,

and it was about one of the astronauts, one of your colleagues,

radilo se o jednom astronautu, jednom od vaših kolega,

and before he went up into space,

i prije nego što je otišao na misiju u svemir,

they actually wrote an obituary, NASA wrote an obituary for him.

napisali su osmrtnicu, NASA je napisala osmrtnicu za njega.

And I was like, is that normal?

A mene je zanimalo, je li to normalno?

And is that part of the job?

Je li to dio posla?

Do you think about that peril that you're putting yourself in

Razmišljate li o opasnosti u koju se dovodite

as you go into space?

dok idete u svemir?

LM: Yeah.

LM: Da.

So, I don't remember anyone writing my obituary,

Pa ne sjećam se da je netko napisao moju osmrtnicu,

maybe that was an Apollo-day thing.

možda su to radili u doba Apollo misija.

But I do know that in the 135 shuttle flights that we've had,

Ali znam da je tijekom 135 Space Shuttle letova koje smo imali,

the shuttle that I flew on,

shuttle kojim sam ja letio,

we had two accidents that killed everyone on that mission.

imali smo dvije nesreće koje su gotovo ubile sve na toj misiji.

And we all know the perils and the risks that go along with this,

Svi mi znamo opasnosti i rizike koji idu uz ovo,

but we're doing something that's much bigger than ourselves,

ali mi radimo nešto što je puno veće od nas samih

and helping advance civilization,

i pomažemo napredak civilizacije,

so the risk is worth the reward.

tako da je rizik vrijedan nagrade.

And we all feel that way when we get into that vehicle

Svi se osjećamo tako kada ulazimo u tu letjelicu

ans strap into those million pounds of rocket fuel and go up to space.

i zavežemo se u te milijune kilograma raketnog goriva i odemo u svemir.

CP: Yeah, I've only seen the Hollywood version --

CP: Da, ja sam samo vidjela hollywoodsku verziju,

it looks pretty terrifying, I have to tell you.

izgleda poprilično zastrašujuće, moram priznati.

LM: You should go.

(Laughter)

LM: Trebali biste probati.

(Smijeh)

CP: Yeah, my husband's told me that a few times.

CP: Da baš, moj mi je muž to rekao nekoliko puta.

(Laughter)

(Smijeh)

LM: One-way trip or two-way?

LM: Put u jednom smjeru ili s povratkom?

(Laughter)

(Smijeh)

CP: That’s a bit of a debate in our house.

CP: To je jedna od debata u našem domu.

(Laughter)

(Smijeh)

I wanted to, if I may ...

Željela sam, ako smijem...

You did touch on something that was very powerful and difficult,

Spomenuli ste nešto što je jako moćno i teško,

which is, you spoke about this incident

govorili ste o tom incidentu

that had happened to you when you were five years old,

koji Vam se dogodio kada ste imali pet godina,

a to je da ste bili silovani.

and that you were raped.

And I just think that for you to be able to say those things,

A ja jednostavno mislim, činjenica da možete reći te stvari,

you know, on the TED stage,

znate, na TED pozornici,

to be able to talk about that at all,

da uopće možete govoriti o tome,

is pretty fearless.

je poprilično neustrašivo.

And I wanted to get a sense from you,

I željela sam Vas pitati,

is that something that you think is important for you to share that now,

mislite li da je to nešto što je važno da podijelite,

to speak about it?

da govorite o tome?

LM: It's so important, especially for men, to talk about things that have happened,

LM: To je jako važno, posebno za muškarce, da razgovaramo o tim događajima,

because we've been trained

zato što smo istrenirani

and told by our society that we have to be so tough and so hard

i naše nam društvo govori da moramo biti čvrsti i snažni

and we can't tell of things that are happening to us.

i da ne možemo govoriti o stvarima koje nam se događaju.

But I've had so many men contact me and tell me that,

Ali toliko mi se muškaraca javilo i reklo mi,

"You came through that, you got over that,

"Prošao si kroz to, prebolio si to,

ja ću izliječiti svoj alkoholizam."

I'm going to get over my alcoholism,"

I te stvari koje se događaju u njima,

and these things that are going on in them,

because of what happened to them.

zbog toga što se dogodilo njima.

And so we must share these stories, this is part of storytelling,

I zato moramo dijeliti te priče, to je zadatak pripovijedanja,

to heal us and to make us whole as a community.

da nas izliječi i učini od nas jednu jedinstvenu zajednicu.

CP: That's wonderful.

CP: To je predivno.

(Applause)

(Pljesak)

And you know, quite honestly, you spoke about perspective shift,

I znate, sasvim iskreno, govorili ste o promjeni perspektive,

and that is a shift that I think we've been very slow to accept

mislim da je to promjena koju jako sporo prihvaćamo,

and to be able to speak about that, so we thank you for that.

a Vi ste uspjeli govoriti o tome, zato Vam zahvaljujemo.

We thank you for being the amazing astronaut that you are,

Zahvaljujemo Vam što ste takav nevjerojatan astronaut

and thank you for coming to the TED stage, Leland.

i hvala Vam što ste došli na TED pozornicu, Lelande.

LM: Thank you so much, Chee.

LM: Hvala Vam puno, Chee.

(Applause)