Adam Grant: How to stop languishing and start finding flow | TED

526,919 views ・ 2021-09-28

TED


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譯者: Lilian Chiu 審譯者: Yi-Ping Cho (Marssi)
我知道你們的待辦事項清單都很長,
但我很討厭浪費時間,
討厭到我還有一張「別做事項」清單。
別滑手機看社群媒體、
別在床上看手機、
除非已經知道想要看什麼, 否則就別開電視。
00:12
I know you all have long to-do lists,
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00:14
but I hate wasting time so much that I have a to-don't list.
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但去年,我發現 我把上述這些規則都打破了。
00:19
Don't scroll on social media,
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我熬夜到超過半夜許久,
00:21
don't check my phone in bed
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一直滑手機看悲慘新聞, 玩永無止境的線上拼字遊戲,
00:23
and don't turn on the TV
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00:24
unless I already know what I want to watch.
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追完每一季影集, 而且那些戲根本沒有多好看。
00:27
But last year I found myself breaking all of those rules.
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隔天早上起床時我精神很差,發誓:
00:31
I was staying up way past midnight,
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00:33
doomscrolling,
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「今天晚上十點上床。」
00:34
playing endless games of online Scrabble
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但我每晚重蹈覆轍,持續了數週。
00:36
and bingeing entire seasons of TV shows that weren't even good.
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我在想什麼啊?
身為組織心理學家, 我的整個職涯都在研究動機,
00:42
The next morning I'd wake up in a daze
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00:44
and swear, "Tonight in bed by 10:00."
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所以,無法解釋自己的行為讓我很煩,
00:47
But it kept happening night after night for weeks.
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我沒有憂鬱,我仍然有希望。
00:51
What was I thinking?
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00:53
As an organizational psychologist,
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沒有倦怠,還有能量。
00:54
I have spent my whole career studying motivation,
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我不孤獨,身邊還有家人。
00:57
so it really bothers me when I can't explain my own behavior.
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我只是覺得有點沒目標、
有點不快樂。
01:02
I wasn't depressed. I still had hope. Wasn't burned out, had energy.
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最後,我想起這種感覺有個名稱:
萎靡。
01:07
Wasn't lonely, I was with my family.
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萎靡是一種空虛、 停滯、倦怠的感覺。
01:10
I just felt a little bit aimless and a little bit joyless.
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社會學家科瑞凱斯創造了這個詞,
哲學家瑪麗亞凱莉讓它變得不朽。
01:15
Eventually, I remembered there's a name for that feeling:
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(笑聲)
01:18
languishing.
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01:19
Languishing as a sense of emptiness, stagnation and ennui.
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當你萎靡時,感覺就是你在混日子。
透過霧朦朦的擋風玻璃看你的人生。
01:23
It was coined by a sociologist Corey Keyes
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01:25
and immortalized by a philosopher, Mariah Carey.
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我很好奇,在座有多少人 在過去幾個月有過這種感覺?
01:28
(Laughter)
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01:31
When you're languishing, it just feels like you're muddling through your days,
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好,那些已經沒精力 把手舉起來的人——
01:34
looking at your life through a foggy windshield.
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(笑聲)
你們現在可能就在萎靡。
01:37
So I'm curious how many of you have felt like that over the past few months.
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還有這邊都沒有笑的人, 你們肯定是在萎靡。
01:43
OK, those of you who didn't have the energy to raise your hands --
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很奇怪——
〔你今天感覺如何?〕 〔咩。咩。咩。〕(笑聲)
01:46
(Laughter)
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01:47
you might be languishing right now.
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有些人通過測驗了。
很奇怪,把我從這種感覺拯救出來的
01:50
And you over here who didn't laugh, you're definitely languishing.
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竟是玩瑪利歐賽車。
01:55
Strangely enough --
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01:56
[How are you feeling today? Meh. Meh. Meh.]
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但,咱們先倒帶一下。
01:58
(Laughter)
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在新冠肺炎剛開始時,許多人苦於
01:59
Some of you passed the quiz.
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02:01
Strangely enough, what rescued me from that feeling was playing Mario Kart.
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恐懼、悲傷,和孤獨。
但隨著疫情一拖再拖,看不到盡頭,
我們的急性痛苦屈服於慢性萎靡。
02:08
But let's back up for a second.
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02:10
In the early days of covid,
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我們都生活在《今天暫時停止》。
02:11
a lot of us were struggling with fear, grief and isolation.
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感覺全世界都停滯了。
於是我寫了一篇文章, 讓大家意識到萎靡。
02:15
But as the pandemic dragged on with no end in sight,
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02:18
our acute anguish gave way to chronic languish.
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我稱之為「被忽視的心理健康 老二(排行中間的孩子)」,
02:22
We were all living in “Groundhog Day.”
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我認為在我們這個時代, 它會是主要的情緒。
02:24
It felt like the whole world was stagnating.
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沒多久,它就無所不在。 媒體上都可以看到它,
02:27
So I wrote an article to put languishing on the map.
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名人、皇室都在討論它。
02:30
I called it "the neglected middle child of mental health"
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我從來沒有見過大家會這麼興奮地
02:34
and I suggested it might be the dominant emotion of our time.
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談論他們完全缺乏興奮。
02:37
And soon it was everywhere.
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(笑聲)
02:39
I was seeing it all over the media,
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且——
02:41
being discussed by celebrities, by royalty.
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我認為——
我認為,給萎靡一個名稱,
02:44
I've never seen people so excited
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能協助大家將一些 困惑的經歷合理化。
02:46
to talk about their utter lack of excitement.
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02:49
(Laughter)
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為什麼就連打了疫苗之後,
大家仍然很難對今年 剩下的日子抱有期望?
02:52
And --
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02:54
I think --
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為什麼當電視播放《國家寶藏》時,
02:55
I think that naming languishing
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02:57
helped people make sense of some puzzling experiences.
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我太太已經能背出所有台詞?
為什麼我熬夜熬太晚,
03:01
Why even after getting vaccinated
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03:03
people were having trouble looking forward to the rest of the year.
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成為所謂報復性睡前拖延症的受害者?
03:06
Why when "National Treasure" came on TV,
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(笑聲)
〔哇!現在才 11 點!我還有時間 可以熬夜上網閒晃,然後搞砸明天〕
03:09
my wife already knew all the words by heart.
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03:12
And why I was staying up way too late,
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03:15
falling victim to what's known as revenge bedtime procrastination.
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因為我們想在乏味的 日子中找到極樂,
03:19
(Laughter)
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在無止境的疫情中找到目的。
但不只有疫情會造成萎靡。
它是人類境況的一部分。
二十年的研究顯示, 萎靡可能會打斷你的專注,
03:29
We were looking for bliss in a blah day and purpose in a perpetual pandemic.
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讓你比較沒有動力。
它也是憂鬱的危險因子之一,
03:35
But languishing is not unique to a pandemic.
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因為萎靡通常會潛伏在表面底下。
03:38
It's part of the human condition.
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你可能不會注意到越來越沒有動力,
03:40
Two decades of research show that languishing can disrupt your focus
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或是平常喜歡的事越來越無趣。
03:44
and dampen your motivation.
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你對你自己的冷漠很冷漠,
03:46
It's also a risk factor for depression
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那就表示,你不會求助,
03:48
because languishing often lurks below the surface.
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你可能甚至不會 做任何事來協助你自己。
03:51
You might not notice when your drive is dwindling
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咩。
03:54
or your delight is dulling
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03:56
You’re indifferent to your own indifference,
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不過,萎靡不僅很難發現,
03:59
which means you don't seek help
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在許多文化中,還很難去談論它。
04:01
and you might not even do anything to help yourself.
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當別人問:「你好嗎?」
他們預期你說「很好!」
04:05
Meh.
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或者「好到不能再好」。
04:08
Languishing isn't just hard to spot, though.
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那叫做有害的正向態度。
04:11
In many cultures, it's hard to talk about, too.
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(笑聲)
04:14
When people ask, "How are you?,"
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04:16
you're expected to say, "Great!"
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那是我們面臨的壓力,
04:18
or "Living my best life."
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要時時刻刻保持樂觀、歡快。
04:21
That's called toxic positivity.
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如果你說「我還好」,
04:24
(Laughter)
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別人可能會鼓勵你要看光明面,
04:28
It's the pressure that we face to be optimistic and upbeat at all times.
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或者幫你列出你有多少福氣。
這不只很惱人,
還可能是不好的建議。
有沒有兩位觀眾自願上臺?
04:35
If you say, "You know, I'm just OK,"
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04:37
then people might encourage you to look on the bright side
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沒人我就只好自己挑, 別突然全部跳出來。好,這邊這位。
04:41
or count your blessings,
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請上來到麥克風這裡, 我還需要一位,
04:43
which isn't just annoying.
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04:44
It can actually be bad advice.
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那邊那位,請上來用這個麥克風。
請為這兩位自願者鼓掌。
04:47
Can I get two volunteers?
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04:49
I will cold-call if I have to, don't all jump at once.
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(掌聲)
04:52
OK, right over here.
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嗨,你叫什麼名字? 馬丁:馬丁。
04:53
You can come up to a mic
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04:55
and can I get another volunteer right over there, up to this mic, please.
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亞當:馬丁,謝謝你。 請告訴我們你人生中的三件好事。
04:58
A round of applause for our two volunteers.
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05:01
(Applause)
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馬丁:我結婚了,我很健康,
05:04
Hi, what's your name?
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我很快樂。
05:06
Martin: Martin.
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亞當:好,很高興結婚擺在第一。
05:07
Adam Grant: Thank you.
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05:08
Can you tell us three good things about your life, please?
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好,另外這位,你叫什麼名字? 李:李。
亞當:李,請告訴我們 你人生中的四十二件好事。
05:13
Martin: I’m married and I’m healthy and I’m happy.
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我的貓提奇普、我的狗安佐。
05:18
AG: All right, I’m glad the marriage came in first.
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我的太太,潔茲。
05:20
Well done. OK, over here. What’s your name?
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亞當:排名第三, 在貓狗後面。(笑聲)
05:22
Lee: Lee.
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05:23
AG: Lee, can you tell us 42 good things about your life?
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幹得好。
我的孩子,印迪歐和華特、 曼徹斯特聯足球俱樂部、
05:28
Lee: My cat Titchypoo, my dog Enzo.
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我的朋友、TED。
05:31
And so my wife, Jazz.
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亞當:TED 在第八位登場。 李:TED 排很高,非常高。
05:32
AG: Third behind the dog and the cat.
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05:34
(Laughter)
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05:35
Well played.
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C.S. 路易斯、E.E. 卡明斯、 狄蘭湯瑪斯的詩。
05:37
Lee: My children, Indio and Walter,
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05:39
Manchester United Football Club,
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05:40
my friends, TED.
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亞當:你要把你聽過的 詩人都列出來嗎?
05:43
AG: TED coming in at ringing eighth.
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好了,李,謝謝。 得請你停下來了。拍拍手。
05:45
Lee: TED is very high, TED is very high.
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05:47
The poetry of C.S. Lewis, E.E. Cummings, Dylan Thomas.
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謝謝兩位。(掌聲)
05:52
AG: You want to name all the poets you’ve ever heard of?
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長久以來,我都假設像李這樣的人
05:55
Alright, Lee, thank you.
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會比馬丁更快樂。
05:57
We’re going to pause you there.
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05:58
Round of applause. Thank you both.
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但我做完實驗才發現事實完全相反。
06:00
(Applause)
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被隨機指派要列出比較多福氣的人
06:04
So for a long time, I assumed that people in Lee's position
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其實,平均而言,比較不快樂,
06:08
were going to be happier than Martin.
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因為你開始數完 你能樂觀看待的事物了。
且,如果你不認識那麼多詩人……
06:11
But when I ran the experiment, I found the exact opposite.
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(笑聲)
06:14
That people who are randomly assigned to count more blessings,
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當你越難找到人生中的美好,
06:17
are actually, on average, less happy
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你就越會覺得,嗯, 也許我的人生沒有那麼好。
06:20
because you start to run out of things to be optimistic about.
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06:23
And if you don't know that many poets ...
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在疫情爆發初期,
研究者發現, 最能用來預測幸福的變數
06:25
(Laughter)
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06:27
The harder it is to find good things about your life,
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不是樂觀。
是心流。
06:30
the more you feel like, well, maybe my life isn't that good.
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心流是一種神馳的感受,
這個概念來自心理學家 米哈里.契克森米哈伊。
06:35
In the early days of the pandemic,
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06:36
researchers found that the best predictor of well-being was not optimism.
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這是一種完全沉浸在 活動當中的狀態,
對各位來說可能是 烹飪、跑步,或園藝,
06:41
It was flow.
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06:43
Flow is that feeling of being in the zone,
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你會忘了時間,
06:46
coined by the psychologist Mihály Csíkszentmihályi.
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你可能還會忘我。
06:50
It's that state of total absorption in an activity.
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心流就是網飛追劇的吸引力,
06:52
For you, it might be cooking or running or gardening
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因為你會被傳送到不同的世界, 埋首於故事當中。
06:57
where you lose track of time
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但追劇只是暫時逃離萎靡,
06:58
and you might even lose your sense of self.
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不是解藥。
07:02
Flow is the appeal of a Netflix binge
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最好的狀況就是追劇讓你 有一堆不對稱的關係。
07:04
because you get transported into a different world
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你可能會很喜歡 和你的朋友混在一起:
07:07
and immersed in a story.
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錢德(六人行)、
07:09
But bingeing is a temporary escape from languishing, not a cure.
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艾莉亞(冰與火之歌)、 杜懷特(我們的辦公室),
巴菲(吸血鬼獵人), 有嗎?(笑聲)
07:14
At best, it leaves you with a bunch of asymmetric relationships.
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異國喬(養虎奇人)、
07:17
You might love hanging out with your friends:
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粉紅豬小妹(卡通)。
(低語)但他們不知道你的存在。
07:20
Chandler,
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07:22
Arya,
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07:23
Dwight,
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追劇是以被動的方式 參與虛構的世界,
07:25
Buffy -- Buffy, anyone? --
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07:26
(Laughter)
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07:27
Joe Exotic,
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最高的心流靠的是主動參與
07:29
Peppa Pig.
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真實的世界。
07:31
(Whispers) But they don't know you exist.
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這就是為什麼我很驚訝 我找到心流的契機竟然是
07:35
Bingeing is passive engagement in a fictional world,
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在任天堂遊戲中開卡通車。
07:39
peak flow depends on active participation
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疫情剛爆發時,我家 三個孩子都在家線上學習,
07:42
in the real world,
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07:44
which is why I was so surprised to find my flow
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這個狀況持續了一整年。
07:47
while driving a cartoon car in a Nintendo game.
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一點也不輕鬆。
有一天,我們在六歲孩子的 成績單上發現這個。
〔被要求時,就能自行 將自己靜音和解除靜音。〕
07:53
When the pandemic first started,
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07:54
all three of our kids were at home in online school,
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07:57
and that lasted for a full year.
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(笑聲)
07:59
It was not easy.
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我知道有些成人都還沒 搞懂那要怎麼做,
08:01
One day we found this on our six-year-old's report card.
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不只是線上,在真實人生中也是。
08:04
[can independently mute and unmute himself when requested to do so]
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我想我們還有那一點可以慶祝。
08:09
(Laughter)
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但和在座許多人一樣,
我們也和大家庭的家人分離。
08:12
You know, I know some adults who still haven't figured that out yet,
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我姐姐住在大半個國家之外,
08:15
not just online, but in real life, too.
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有一天,我們在回憶 小時候有多愛玩瑪利歐賽車。
08:18
So I guess we had that to celebrate.
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08:21
But like many of you, we were isolated from extended family.
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她說:「我們現在 可以一起在線上玩。」
為什麼不來一場家庭賽?
08:25
My sister was halfway across the country.
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沒多久,我們就天天都在玩, 同時打開視訊通話。
08:28
And one day we were reminiscing about how much we love playing Mario Kart
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幾週之後,我不再覺得那麼無聊了。
08:32
as we were kids.
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08:33
And she said, "Well, we could all play together online now."
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我過著瑪利歐賽車式的禪意生活。 (笑聲)
08:36
Why don't we start a family game?
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08:38
And soon we were playing every day
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早上,我們的孩子才起床,
08:40
with a video call running at the same time.
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就會問我們何時要玩。他們好興奮。
08:43
And after a couple of weeks I stopped feeling so blah.
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他們很愛看我本來快贏時洋洋得意,
08:47
I was living zen in the art of Mario Kart.
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卻被飛過來的藍色龜殼炸到,
08:50
(Laughter)
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08:51
In the morning our kids were waking up, asking what time we would play.
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後來只能坐在那裡, 看著我們的三個孩子
開著小卡丁車從我旁邊 呼嘯而過衝向終點線。
08:55
They were excited.
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08:57
And they loved it when I would gloat about an impending victory,
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我們玩得太開心,因此在星期六 晚上孩子睡覺後展開了新傳統:
09:00
only to be bombed by a flying blue shell
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09:03
and then just sit there watching all three of our kids
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成人瑪利歐賽車。
(笑聲)
09:06
drive past me to the finish line in tiny go-carts.
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反思了那段經歷之後,
09:10
We had so much fun that we started a new Saturday night tradition
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我很驕傲能在各位面前初次呈獻
09:13
after the kids were asleep.
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我的最高心流瑪利歐賽車理論。
09:15
Adult Mario Kart.
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09:16
(Laughter)
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它有三項條件:精通、
09:19
So after reflecting on that experience,
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全心專注、找到重要性。
咱們從精通談起。
09:22
I'm proud to present to you for the first time
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最近,很多人都會覺得 很難精通一件事。
09:25
my Mario Kart theory of peak flow.
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(笑聲)
心理學家發現,在工作上,
09:29
It has three conditions: mastery, mindfulness and mattering.
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促成日常動力和喜悅的最強因素
09:34
Let's start with mastery.
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是進步感。
09:35
Mastery is something
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我們發現,在西方文化中, 我們的快樂仰賴
09:37
a lot of us have been having a hard time finding lately.
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09:39
(Laughter)
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09:40
Psychologists find that at work
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今天專案順不順, 而不是昨天專案順不順。
09:43
the strongest factor in daily motivation and joy
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那就是為什麼 Nike 說 「Just do it(做就是了)」。
09:46
is a sense of progress.
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我想,如果 Nike 在比較著重 過去的國家發跡,如中國,
09:48
We find that our happiness depends in Western cultures
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09:52
more on how our projects are going today than how they went yesterday.
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標語會變成「Just did it (剛做過了)」。
09:56
That's why Nike says, "Just do it."
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如果萎靡是一種停滯,
09:59
I guess if Nike had been started in a more past-focused country like China,
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那心流就和動能有關。
但精通不見得要是大成就,
10:04
their slogan would be, "Just did it."
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也可以是小勝利。
小勝利說明了為什麼 我會被線上拼字遊戲吸引,
10:09
If languishing is stagnation, flow involves momentum.
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因為急著想去玩七個字母的單字。
10:13
But mastery does not have to be a big accomplishment,
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小勝利可以合理說明為何這麼多人 初次烤出酸種麵包就會好興奮。
10:17
it can be small wins.
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小勝利也能解釋為何工程師
10:19
Small wins explain why I was drawn to online Scrabble
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會花一個下午的時間,
10:22
for the rush of playing a seven-letter word.
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去精通把 M&M’s 巧克力 一個一個疊起來的藝術。
10:25
Small wins makes sense of why so many people were thrilled
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10:28
to bake their first loaf of sourdough bread.
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咱們來看看。
10:30
And small wins explain why one engineer spent an entire afternoon
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(影片)這比我預期的還困難。
10:35
mastering the art of stacking M&M's on top of each other.
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噢!
10:40
Take a look.
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喔!
10:42
(Video) This is going to be harder than I thought.
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五顆 M&M’s!五顆 M&M’s!
(笑聲)
亞當:結果發現那是世界紀錄。
(笑聲)
10:51
Oh!
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那樣的精通,要仰賴 心流的第二個條件:
10:53
Oh!
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10:54
Five M&Ms! Five M&Ms!
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全心專注。
把所有的注意力放到 單一工作任務上,
10:58
(Laughter)
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11:00
AG: Turns out that was a world record.
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最近大部分人都很少做到這一點。
11:02
(Laughter)
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11:04
That kind of mastery depends on a second condition for flow,
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〔你還好嗎?你幾乎沒有在 注意你的書、手機、節目、
11:07
mindfulness.
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筆電,和你十分鐘前 開始玩的填字遊戲。〕
11:09
Focusing your full attention on a single task,
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證據顯示,
11:12
not something a lot of us are doing that much these days.
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平均來說,人每天 會檢查電子郵件 74 次。
每十分鐘換做另一件事情,
11:16
[Are you OK? You’re barely paying attention to your book, phone, show ... ]
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11:19
[ ... laptop and the crossword you started ten minutes ago.]
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造就了所謂的「碎片時間」,
11:22
There's evidence that on average, people are checking emails 74 times a day,
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我們把人生中本來 可能很有意義的時刻
切碎成為越來越小、 越來越無用的碎片。
11:27
switching tasks every 10 minutes,
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碎片時間是能量和卓越之敵。
11:32
and that creates what's been called time confetti,
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如果我們想要找到心流, 就需要更好的界線。
11:35
where we take what could be meaningful moments of our lives
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11:37
and we shred them
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〔這東西能避免我每兩秒鐘 就去看一下手機。〕
11:39
into increasingly tiny, useless pieces.
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11:42
Time confetti is an enemy of both energy and of excellence.
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(笑聲)
說到界線時,
11:46
If we want to find flow, we need better boundaries.
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我會想到組織學者 萊絲莉.普羅做的實驗。
11:50
[It keeps me from looking at my phone every two seconds.]
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她到一間《財星》五百大企業 檢驗安靜時段政策。
11:54
(Laughter)
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一週有三個早上 不會有人打斷你做事。
11:57
When I think about boundaries,
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11:58
I think of an experiment by organizational scholar Leslie Perlow.
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平均而言,工程師的產能大大提升。
12:02
She went to a Fortune 500 company and she tested a quiet time policy.
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47% 的工程師比平常更有生產力。
最棒的是,當該公司 把安靜時段訂為官方政策時,
12:07
No interruptions three mornings a week before noon.
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生產力會比平均高 65%。
12:11
On average, engineers spiked in productivity.
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我想,星期二、星期四、星期五 中午以前的時段沒什麼神奇的。
12:14
47 percent of them were more productive than usual.
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12:17
But the best part is that when the company made quiet time official policy,
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這裡的教訓是,我們應該 要把能不被打斷的時段
12:21
they had 65 percent above average productivity.
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當作寶藏來守護。
精通和全心專注能讓你達到心流,
12:25
I don't think there's anything magical
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12:27
about Tuesday, Thursday, Friday before noon.
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但有第三個條件能把心流 變成最棒的體驗。
12:30
The lesson here is that we need to treat uninterrupted blocks of time
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找到重要性。
知道你能為他人改善境況。
12:33
as treasures to guard.
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12:36
Now, mastery and mindfulness will get you to flow,
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職涯初期時我研究過 負責打電話募款的人,
他們要請校友捐錢給大學,
12:40
but there's a third condition that turns it into a peak experience.
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當我看到他們牆壁上張貼的標語, 我就知道他們在萎靡了。
12:43
Mattering. Knowing that you make a difference to other people.
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〔在這裡把工作做好, 就像是尿在深色褲子上,
12:48
Early in my career, I was studying fundraising callers
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你會有暖暖的感覺, 但沒人會注意到。〕
12:50
who were trying to bring in alumni donations to a university,
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(笑聲)
12:54
and I knew they were languishing when I saw this sign posted on their wall.
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我想要研究,如何讓他們 知道他們的工作有重要性。
於是我設計了一系列的實驗,
12:58
[Doing a good job here is like wetting your pants in a dark suit]
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結果次月有一組人平均每週 花在電話上的時間變成兩倍多,
13:02
[You get a warm feeling but no one else notices]
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13:04
(Laughter)
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每週收益則變成近三倍。
13:06
I wanted to study how to show them that their work mattered.
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會有這樣的改變,是因為他們 被隨機指派和一名學生見面,
13:09
So I designed a series of experiments
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13:12
and over the next month, one group of callers on average
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該學生的獎學金 來自他們工作募得的捐款。
13:15
more than doubled in weekly time on the phone
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現在他們不會把焦點 放在單調的打電話過程,
13:17
and nearly tripled in weekly revenue.
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反而全神貫注在有意義的目的上:
13:20
What moved the needle was randomly assigning them to meet one student
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協助募集學費。
13:24
whose scholarship had been funded by their work.
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想想看如果你的工作不存在 會讓哪些人的境況變糟。
13:28
Now, instead of focusing on the monotonous process of making calls,
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那些人會讓你的工作有重要性。
13:31
they were absorbed in a meaningful purpose of helping to fund tuition.
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你得要知道他們的 名字、面孔、故事,
你就能在對他們有益的 專案計畫中找到心流。
13:36
So think about the people who would be worse off if your job didn't exist.
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這完全解釋了為什麼瑪利歐賽車 對我而言是這麼棒的體驗。
13:40
Those are the people who make your work matter.
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它給了我精通的感覺,
13:43
You need to know their names, their faces and their stories,
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和甜美的滿足感 ──把香蕉皮放在完美的位子,
13:47
and you can find flow in projects that benefit them.
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等著讓我姐姐打滑。
13:51
This all explains why Mario Kart was such a great experience for me.
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這遊戲也需要全心專注。
我姐夫是最強的玩家。
13:54
It gave me a feeling of mastery,
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要打敗他就需要完全專注,
13:56
the sweet satisfaction of a perfectly placed banana peel
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特別是我的孩子 還跟他聯手來對付我。
14:00
for my sister to slip on.
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而且這件事不只是個遊戲, 還有它的重要性。
14:03
It required mindfulness too.
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14:05
My brother-in-law was the best player.
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在過去一年,我們都感到某種無助。
14:07
Beating him demanded total concentration,
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14:09
especially when my kids were ganging up with him against me.
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對改善疫情我感到無助。
我甚至沒辦法做什麼 讓線上學習變更好。
14:13
And it wasn't just a game. It mattered.
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我還是個老師。
但在瑪利歐賽車裡, 我覺得我能助人。
14:17
Over the past year, we've all felt helpless in one way or another.
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在我們無法出門時, 我還能給孩子一些期待。
14:21
I felt helpless to fix covid.
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14:23
I couldn't even do that much to make online school better.
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當家人分隔各地時, 我能讓全家緊密連結。
14:26
And I'm a teacher.
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14:28
But in Mario Kart, I felt helpful.
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我們通常認為心流是個人的經歷。
但在玩任天堂時, 我們都沉浸在一起。
14:31
I was able to give my kids something to look forward to
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14:34
when we couldn't go anywhere.
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雖然我們不再每天玩了,
14:36
I was able to keep my family close when we were far apart.
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我覺得我和姐姐及姐夫 比以前更親近了。
14:40
We normally think of flow as an individual experience.
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我學到,愛的重點 並不是溝通的頻率,
14:43
But playing Nintendo, we were all immersed together.
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是連結的深度。
14:46
And although we don't play daily anymore,
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我也了解到,萎靡的解藥
14:48
I feel closer to my sister and my brother-in-law
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不見得要是有生產力的事物,
14:51
than I ever had before.
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2002
也可以是好玩的事物。
14:53
I learned that love is not the frequency of communication,
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心流最高峰的時刻,就是 和我們愛的人一同享樂的時刻,
14:56
it's the depth of connections.
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14:59
I also realized that the antidote to languishing
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這一點現在已經被我納入 我的每日待辦事項清單了。
15:02
does not have to be something productive,
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所以,你的瑪利歐賽車是什麼?
15:05
it can be something joyful.
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你在哪裡能找到精通和全心專注, 並和對你重要的人在一起?
15:07
Our peak moments of flow are having fun with the people we love,
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我認為我們要重新思考 我們對於心理健康及幸福的了解。
15:12
which is now a daily task on my to-do list.
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不憂鬱,並不表示你沒有掙扎。
15:16
So what's your version of Mario Kart?
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2002
15:18
Where do you find mastery and mindfulness with the people who matter to you?
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沒有筋疲力竭,
不表示你就充滿熱情。
15:23
I think we need to rethink our understanding
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當別人問:「你好嗎?」
15:25
of mental health and well-being.
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你可以說:「老實說,我很萎靡。」
15:27
Not depressed doesn't mean you're not struggling.
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或者,如果你只能發出一個音,
15:32
Not burned out
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15:33
doesn't mean you're fired up.
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就說「咩」。(笑聲)
15:35
When someone says, "How are you?,"
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當你準備好,就可以開始尋找心流,
15:38
it's OK to say, "Honestly, I'm languishing."
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照亮脫離空虛的路。
謝謝。
15:42
Or if you can only muster one syllable,
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(掌聲)
15:45
"Meh."
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15:47
(Laughter)
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15:48
And when you're ready, you can start finding the flow
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15:51
that lights a path out of the void.
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15:53
Thank you.
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15:54
(Applause)
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本網站將向您介紹對學習英語有用的 YouTube 視頻。 您將看到來自世界各地的一流教師教授的英語課程。 雙擊每個視頻頁面上顯示的英文字幕,從那裡播放視頻。 字幕與視頻播放同步滾動。 如果您有任何意見或要求,請使用此聯繫表與我們聯繫。

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This website was created in October 2020 and last updated on June 12, 2025.

It is now archived and preserved as an English learning resource.

Some information may be out of date.

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