How to love, according to Rumi - Stephanie Honchell Smith

“A candle is made to become entirely flame.

In that annihilating moment it has no shadow.”

According to legend, the renowned scholar, Jalaluddin Muhammad Rumi,

was giving a lecture when an older, disheveled man approached

and asked him the meaning of his academic books.

Rumi didn’t know it yet, but this question and this man

would change his life.

Annoyed at the interruption, Rumi snapped,

“They are something that you do not understand!”

Suddenly, the books caught fire.

The man looked back at the astounded Rumi and simply replied:

“You couldn’t possibly understand.”

The mysterious figure was Shams of Tabriz,

a charismatic Sufi mystic who would transform Rumi's worldview.

Rumi, inspired by Shams’ teachings,

would go on to become one of the world’s most celebrated poets

and mystical philosophers,

whose cultural legacy looms large across Türkiye and the Persian-speaking world.

Rumi was born in 1207 near the Afghan city of Balkh,

and as a child emigrated to Anatolia, where his father— a preacher and mystic—

hoped to secure a more prestigious position.

By the time of Shams’ arrival,

Rumi was a well-respected scholar of Islamic law in the town of Konya.

While he had been exposed to Sufism—

the mystical path within Islam, which focuses on experiencing God’s love—

he’d shown little interest in it.

But this changed in his late thirties, when Shams came into his life.

The academic study of law and theology was no longer Rumi's central focus.

Rather, he saw them as candles guiding the way towards his ultimate goal:

the reunification of his soul with God through the experience of divine love.

He wrote of this tension in his native Persian,

“Love resides not in learning, not in knowledge, not in pages and books.

Wherever the debates of men may lead, that is not the lover’s path.”

While Sufism had been part of Islamic observance for centuries,

the practices of some Sufis— from ecstatic dancing to composing poetry—

were looked down upon by conservative religious elites.

As Rumi increasingly embraced Sufism under Shams’ influence,

many of his earlier followers disapproved.

When Shams suddenly disappeared, suspicions arose that he'd been murdered.

Rumi expressed his devastation through poetry:

“He bathed us like a candle in his light; in thin air vanished, left us!”

Rather than turning away from Sufism, Rumi became more devoted,

participating in ritualized dancing and preaching the religion of love

through lectures, poetry, and prose.

And while Shams would never return, Rumi continued to share his teachings,

seeing himself as the moon reflecting the light of Shams’ sun.

While in his mystical states, he composed the “Divan-i-Shams,”

a sprawling collection of lyrical poems

that included many of the sayings for which he is famous today.

The work expresses intense feelings of love and longing,

not only for his vanished mentor, but for the divine creator.

Over time, Rumi's poetry matured.

He no longer saw himself as a reflection of Shams,

but as a beacon of light on his own.

In his early fifties, Rumi wrote “Masnavi,”

which shifts from ecstatic expressions of divine love

to verses that guide others to discover it for themselves.

The poems are complex and layered,

incorporating ideas, stories, and quotes from Islamic religious texts,

Arabic and Persian literature, and earlier Sufi writings and poetry.

In one story, he invokes the well-known characters of Layla

and the love-crazed Majnun.

In Rumi’s version, the king,

hearing Majnun’s musings on Layla’s unsurpassed beauty,

demands to see her.

But when Layla arrives, he’s confused,

as her beauty pales in comparison to Majnun's praises.

To this, Layla replies, “I am Layla. The problem is you are not Majnun.”

For Rumi, experiencing love meant opening his heart to all of God’s creation—

looking at everything and everyone like Majnun gazing upon Layla.

In this way, he saw romantic love as an expression—

on a smaller scale— of divine love.

Following Rumi’s death, the Mevlevi Sufi order was established around his teachings

and still exists in Türkiye today.

His poems and other writings were copied and dispersed across the Islamic world,

inspiring and shaping Persian poetry,

before being introduced to the West in the 19th century.

For generations, his works have been read and reread,

translated and reinterpreted, drawing admirers from around the world.

While Rumi's words reflect his specific historical context and Islamic worldview,

for many, his message feels universal:

“If you have lost heart in the Path of Love,

flee to me without delay:

I am a fortress invincible.”