3 lessons on starting a movement from a self-defense trailblazer | Rana Abdelhamid

Translator: Joseph Geni Reviewer: Joanna Pietrulewicz

翻译人员: Evan Xu 校对人员: Bighead Ge

So my story starts on July 4, 1992,

我的故事从1992年7月4号开始，

the day my mother followed her college sweetheart

那一天我的妈妈跟着她大学恋人，

to New York City from Egypt.

从埃及到了纽约。

As fireworks exploded behind the skyline,

烟花在他们身后的天际线上绽开，

my father looked at my mother jokingly and said,

爸爸看着妈妈，开玩笑说道：

"Look, habibti,

“看，Habibti，

Americans are celebrating your arrival."

美国在庆祝你的到来。”

(Laughter)

（笑声）

Unfortunately, it didn't feel much like a celebration

不幸的是，实际的感觉并不像是庆祝。

when, growing up, my mother and I would wander past Queens

在我长大的时候， 我的妈妈和我会经过皇后区

into New York City streets,

进入纽约城的街道。

and my mother with her hijab and long flowy dresses

我的妈妈戴着头巾，穿着长长的裙子，

would tighten her hand around my small fingers

用手紧紧地牵着我的手指，

as she stood up against weathered comments like,

面对着那些”老生常谈“般的 侮辱话语：

"Go back to where you came from,"

“从哪儿来回哪儿去”，

"Learn English,"

“去学英语”，

"Stupid immigrant."

“愚蠢的移民”。

These words were meant to make us feel unsafe, insecure

这些话语，让我们在自己的社区

in our own neighborhoods, in our own skin.

深深地感到不安。

But it was these same streets

但是也正是这些同样的街道

that made me fall in love with New York.

让我爱上了纽约。

Queens is one of the most diverse places in the world,

皇后区是世界上最多元的地方之一，

with immigrant parents holding stories that always start

在这里移民家长们的故事 往往这么开头，

with something between three and 15 dollars in a pocket,

比如口袋里只有三到十五美元，

a voyage across a vast sea

比如一段长长的跨洋航行和

and a cash-only hustle

一份只有现金的零工，

sheltering families in jam-packed, busted apartments.

可以让家庭住在拥挤不堪的公寓里。

And it was these same families

同样是这些家庭，

that worked so hard to make sure that we had safe microcommunities --

他们非常努力地工作以确保我们——

移民的下一代可以有安全的小社区，

we, as immigrant children,

to feel affirmed and loved in our identities.

可以对自己的身份确信并热爱。

But it was mostly the women.

但是这大部分是女性。

And these women are the reason why,

正是因为这些女性，

regardless of these statements that my mom faced,

当我的妈妈面对那样的言论时，

she remained unapologetic.

她没有道歉。

And these women were some of the most powerful women

这些女性是我整个人生中

遇到的最有力量的女性之一。

I have ever met in my entire life.

I mean, they had networks for everything.

我的意思是，任何事情， 她们都有关系网。

They had rotations for who watched whose kids when,

她们有轮换制， 要求谁什么时候照看谁的孩子，

for saving extra cash,

她们会存下额外的现金，

for throwing belly dance parties

会举办肚皮舞派对，

and memorizing Koran and learning English.

会记忆古兰经并学习英语。

And they would collect small gold tokens

她们也会收集小金币

to fundraise for the local mosque.

为当地清真寺募捐。

And it was these same women,

当我决定戴上我的头巾时，

when I decided to wear my hijab,

同样是这些女性，

who supported me through it.

一直支持着我。

And when I was bullied for being Muslim,

当我因穆斯林身份遭到欺凌时，

I always felt like I had an army of unapologetic North African aunties

我一直感觉身后有一只军队在支持我，

一只由不低头的北非阿姨组成的军队。

who had my back.

And so every morning at 15,

所以15岁的每个早晨，

I would wake up and stand in front of a mirror,

我会醒来站在镜子面前，

and wrap beautiful bright silk around my head

把美丽光泽的丝巾绕在我的头上，

the way my mother does and my grandmother did.

就像我妈妈和祖母做的一样。

And one day that summer 2009,

2009年夏天的某一天

I stepped out into the streets of New York City

我在纽约街上，

on my way to volunteer at a domestic violence organization

准备作为志愿者参加 反家庭暴力组织的活动，

that a woman in my neighborhood had started.

这个组织是由我邻居中的 一位女性开办的。

And I remember at that moment I felt a yank at the back of my head.

我记得那时我感觉后脑勺一阵猛拉。

Then someone pulled and grabbed me,

然后一个人又拉又拽，

trying to remove my hijab from off of my head.

想要把我的头巾拉扯下来。

I turned around to a tall, broad-shouldered man,

我转身，看到一个高高的宽肩男人，

pure hate in his eyes.

眼睛里全是仇恨。

I struggled and fought back,

我挣扎着反击，

and finally was able to get away,

终于逃脱。

hid myself in the bathroom of that organization and cried and cried.

我躲在那个组织场所的卫生间里， 一直在哭。

I kept thinking to myself,

我不停地问自己，

"Why does he hate me?

“为什么他恨我？

He doesn't even know me."

他甚至不认识我。”

Hate crimes against Muslims in the US

在美国，911之后，

increased by 1,600 percent post-9/11,

针对穆斯林的仇恨犯罪 上涨了1600%。

and one in every four women in the US

并且在美国四分之一的女性

will suffer some form of gender violence.

会遭受性别暴力。

And it may not seem like it,

也许看上去不像那么回事，

but Islamophobia and anti-Muslim violence

但是伊斯兰恐惧症和反穆斯林暴力

is a form of gender violence,

是性别暴力的一种形式，

given the visibility of Muslim women in our hijabs.

因为穆斯林女性穿戴头巾十分显眼。

And so I was not alone,

我不是个例，

and that horrified me.

这让我害怕。

It made me want to do something.

这让我想做一些事，

It made me want to go out there and make sure that no one I loved,

这让我想做些事确保我所爱的人，

that no woman would have to feel this insecure in her own skin.

所有女性都能感到真正的安全。

So I started to think about how the women in my own neighborhood

所以我开始想，自己街区的女性如何

were able to build community for themselves,

能够为她们自己建造社区，

and how they were able to use the very little resources they had

以及她们如何能利用仅有的资源

to actually offer something.

做出实事。

And I began to think about what I could potentially offer

然后我开始想我可以提供些什么

to build safety and power for women.

来为女性提供安全和力量。

And through this journey,

通过这次经历，

I learned a couple of things,

我学到了一些事情，

and this is what I want to share with you today, some of these lessons.

而今天我想分享这些心得。

So lesson number one:

第一点：

start with what you know.

从你知道的部分开始。

At the time, I had been doing Shotokan karate

当时，我记得

for as long as I could remember,

我在打松涛馆跆拳道，

and so I had a black belt.

并且有个黑带。

Yeah. And so, I thought -- surprise.

是吧，我觉得…… 哈哈没想到吧

(Laughter)

（笑声）

I thought that maybe I should go out into my neighborhood

我想也许我应该深入街区

and teach self-defense to young girls.

教年轻女性自卫技巧。

And so I actually went out and knocked on doors,

所以我的确走出去了， 挨家挨户地敲门，

spoke to community leaders, to parents, to young women,

和社区领导、家长、年轻女性对话，

and finally was able to secure a free community center basement

最终得到了一个免费的 社区中心地下室，

and convince enough young women that they should come to my class.

并确保有足够多的年轻女性 到我的班级来。

And it actually all worked out,

这么做的确有用，

because when I pitched the idea,

因为当我推出这个想法的时候，

most of the responses were, like,

大多数的回应是，

"All right, cute,

“行，挺可爱，

this 5'1" hijabi girl who knows karate.

这个一米五、戴着头巾的女孩 知道怎么打跆拳道。

How nice."

有意思。“

But in reality, I became the Queens, New York version of Mr. Miyagi

但事实上，我在16岁，

成为了纽约皇后区的Miyagi先生，

at 16 years old,

and I started teaching 13 young women in that community center basement

并且开始在那个地下室教13个年轻女孩

self-defense.

自卫术。

And with every single self-defense move,

那个夏天八节课，

for eight sessions over the course of that summer,

通过防卫术练习的一招一式，

we began to understand the power of our bodies,

我们开始理解自己身体的力量，

and we began to share our experiences

开始分享关于自身

about our identities.

身份个性的经验。

And sometimes there were shocking realizations,

有的时候有惊人的认识，

and other times there were tears,

有的时候有泪水，

but mostly it was laughs.

但大部分是欢笑。

And I ended that summer with this incredible sisterhood,

那个夏天之后， 我收获了珍贵的姐妹情，

and I began to feel much safer in my own skin.

并发自内心感觉更加安全。

And it was because of these women that we just kept teaching.

正因为这些女性， 我们可以一直开班教授。

I never thought that I would continue, but we just kept teaching.

我从没想过我可以继续， 但我们确实一直在教。

And today, nine years, 17 cities,

今天，经历了9年、17个城市、

12 countries, 760 courses

12个国家、760堂课程

and thousands of women and girls later,

以及上千名女性，

I'm still teaching.

我依旧在教。

And what started as a self-defense course

而一开始社区中心地下室的

in the basement of a community center

自卫防身课程，

is now an international grassroots organization

现在已经成为国际性民间组织，

focused on building safety and power for women around the world:

聚焦于为全世界的女性 建构安全和力量：

Malikah.

Malikah。

(Applause)

（掌声）

Now, for lesson number two:

现在，讲讲我学到的第二点：

start with who you know.

从你知道的人开始。

Oftentimes, it could be quite exciting,

经常，这可以很有意思，

especially if you're an expert in something

尤其当你是某个领域的专家，

and you want to have impact,

想要发挥影响，

to swoop into a community and think you have the magic recipe.

猛地进入一个社区， 觉得自己有魔法配方。

But very early on I learned

但是我很早之前就知道，

that, as esteemed philosopher Kendrick Lamar once said,

备受推崇的“哲学家” 肯德拉克·拉马尔曾说过，

it's really important to be humble and to sit down.

谦卑并坐下来是十分重要的。

So, basically, at 15 years old,

因此，15的时候

the only community that I had any business doing work with

我基本有来往合作的团体只有

were the 14-year-old girls in my neighborhood,

附近14岁的女孩们，

and that's because I was friends with them.

因为我和她们是朋友。

Other than that, I didn't know what it meant to be a child

除此之外，我并不了解在布鲁克林

of Bengali immigrants in Brooklyn

作为孟加拉移民孩子或在布朗克斯

or to be Senegalese in the Bronx.

作为塞内加尔移民的孩子 意味着什么。

But I did know young women who were connected to those communities,

但我认识和这些社区 有联系的年轻女性，

and it was quite remarkable how they already had

而且了不起的是

她们已经和社区建立起 信任、意识和联系。

these layers of trust and awareness and relationship with their communities.

So like my mother and the women in her neighborhood,

所以就像我母亲和她邻近区域的女性那样，

they had these really strong social networks,

这些年轻女性拥有 十分强大的社交网络，

and it was about providing capacity

并能提供能力，

and believing in other women's definition of safety.

相信其他女性对于安全的定义。

Even though I was a self-defense instructor,

尽管我是一个自卫训练师，

I couldn't come into a community

我不能进入一个社区，

and define safety for any other woman

为不是自己社区的女性

who was not part of my own community.

定义安全。

And it was because, as our network expanded,

因为，随着我们网络的扩张，

I learned that self-defense is not just physical.

我学到自卫不仅是身体上的。

It's actually really emotional work.

而是心理上的。

I mean, we would do a 60-minute self-defense class,

我的意思是， 我们会做60分钟的自卫课，

and then we'd have 30 minutes reserved for just talking and healing.

然后我们会留30分钟单纯聊天治愈。

And in those 30 minutes,

在那30分钟里，

women would share what brought them to the class to begin with

女性一开始会分享参加课程的原因，

but also various other experiences with violence.

但是也会分享和暴力相关的其他经验。

And, as an example, one time in one of those classes,

比如说，有一次在其中一堂课上，

one woman actually started to talk about the fact

一位女性开始倾诉，

that she had been in a domestic violence relationship for over 30 years,

说30多年来 她一直处于一段家暴关系中，

and it was her first time being able to articulate that

这是她第一次有机会说出来，

because we had established that safe space for her.

因为我们为她提供了一个安全的空间。

So it's powerful work,

这份工作充满力量，

but it only happens when we believe in women's agency to define

但只有当我们相信女性有能力为自身

what safety and what power looks like for themselves.

定义安全和力量时，这才会发生。

All right, for lesson number three --

好，我学到的第三课——

and this was the hardest thing for me --

对我来说是最难的——

the most important thing about this work is to start with the joy.

对这项工作来说最重要的 就是快乐地开始。

When I started doing this work, I was reacting to a hate-based attack,

当我开始这个项目时， 我要回应充满仇恨的攻击，

so I was feeling insecure and anxious and overwhelmed.

所以我充满不安、焦虑、备受打击。

I was really afraid.

我当时十分害怕。

And it makes sense, because if you take a step back,

这是合理的，因为如果你退一步，

and I can imagine that a lot of women in this room can probably relate to this,

我能想象这里很多女性 也许都能感同身受，

the feeling, an overwhelming feeling of insecurity,

这种强烈的不安全感，

is oftentimes with us constantly.

经常伴随着我们。

I mean, imagine this:

我的意思是，想象一下：

walking home late at night, hearing footsteps behind you.

在夜里走回家，听见身后响起脚步声。

You wonder if you should walk faster or if you should slow down.

你在想是要走得快一点还是慢下来。

You keep your keys in your hand in case you need to use them.

你紧紧攥着钥匙以备不时之需。

You say, "Text me when you get home. I want to make sure you are safe."

你说，“到家时给我发个信息。 我想确保你安全到达。”

And we mean those words.

而我们对此十分认真。

We're afraid to put down our drinks.

我们害怕，不敢放下饮料。

We're afraid to speak too much or too little in a meeting.

我们害怕在一个会议中 讲得太多或是太少。

And imagine being woman and black and trans and queer and Latinx

想象一个女性，或者黑人、 跨性别者、同性恋、拉丁裔

and undocumented and poor and immigrant,

或是未注册的、贫穷的移民，

and you could then only imagine how overwhelming this work can be,

那么你才能明白这项工作多么沉重，

especially within the context of personal safety.

特别是关于个人安全的工作。

However, when I took a step to reflect

然而，当我思考

on what brought me to this work to begin with,

这项工作的初衷时，

I began to realize it was actually the love that I had

我意识到一切始于

for women in my community.

我对我社区之中女性的爱。

It was the way I saw them gather,

她们的团结，

their ability to build for each other,

她们支撑彼此的能力

that inspired me to keep doing this work

激励我每天

day in and day out.

继续这项工作。

So whether I was in a refugee camp in Jordan

所以不管是在约旦的难民营里，

or a community center in Dallas, Texas

还是在德克萨斯州 达拉斯的社区中心里，

or a corporate office in Silicon Valley,

或是硅谷公司的办公室里，

women gathered in beautifully magical ways

女性汇聚在一起，充满美丽和魔力，

and they built together and supported each other

互相支持，

in ways that shifted culture

以此转变文化，

to empower and build safety for women.

为女性赋权、构建安全。

And that is how the change happens.

这就是改变如何发生的，

It was through those relationships we built together.

通过我们共筑的关系发生。

That's why we don't just teach self-defense,

因此我们不只是教自卫术，

but we also throw dance parties

我们也会举办派对，

and host potlucks

组织聚餐，

and write love notes to each other

给彼此写爱心便签，

and sing songs together.

并且一起唱歌。

And it's really about the friendship,

这一切都关乎友谊，

and it's been so, so fun.

而且很有意思。

So the last thing I want to leave you with

所以最后我想分享一点，

is that the key takeaway for me in teaching self-defense all of these years

是我在这几年教授防身术中 学到的关键一点，

is that I actually don't want women, as cool as the self-defense moves are,

那就是尽管防身术招式很酷， 但实际上

to go out and use these self-defense techniques.

我不想女性走出去 会用到这些自卫技巧。

I don't want any woman to have to de-escalate any violent situation.

我希望任何女性 都不用去化解任何暴力情况。

But for that to happen,

但是如果要达到这一点，

the violence shouldn't happen,

暴力就不应该出现。

and for the violence not to happen,

如果想要不出现暴力，

the systems and the cultures

那么允许暴力发生的

that allow for this violence to take place to begin with needs to stop.

系统和文化需要开始停止。

And for that to happen, we need all hands on deck.

要达到这一点， 我们需要所有人的参与。

So I've given you my secret recipe,

所以，我已经告诉了你们 我的秘密配方，

and now it's up to you.

现在这取决于你，

To start with what you know, to start with who you know

从你知道的事务开始， 从你知道的人开始，

and to start with joy. But just start.

带着乐趣开始。 但最重要的是要开始行动。

Thank you so much.

非常感谢。

(Applause)

（掌声）