The money talk that every couple needs to have | Your Money and Your Mind

Transcriber:

You know how your partner likes their coffee,

譯者: Lilian Chiu 審譯者: Helen Chang

你知道你的伴侶喜歡怎麼 調製咖啡，用什麼話來示愛，

what love language they speak

and even their medical history.

甚至知道伴侶的醫療史。

But how much do you know about their finances?

但你對伴侶的財務知道多少？

[Your Money and Your Mind with Wendy De La Rosa]

〔你的錢和你的腦〕 〔溫蒂·迪·拉·羅沙主持〕

Chances are, you and your better half are among the 78 percent of people

很有可能，

你和你的另一半跟 78% 的人一樣，

who would rather share their full dating history

寧可分享完整的約會史

and all of that drama

以及所有的戲劇性情節 和相關的各種包袱，

and all of that baggage that comes along with it,

rather than to disclose your full financial history.

也不肯揭露出完整的財務史。

And yet research shows that your significant other

但，研究顯示，你至關重要的另一半

has a large influence on a whole host of your behaviors.

對你的許多行為都有非常大的影響。

Understanding how they handle money

了解對方怎麼處理錢，

is a great way to prevent strife and misunderstandings.

是預防吵架和誤解的好方法。

In fact, financial disagreements rank as the strongest predictor of divorce.

事實上，離婚背後最強的 預測因子就是財務歧見。

So my tip here is that if you want to strengthen your relationship,

所以，我的秘訣是， 如果你想要鞏固你的關係，

it's time to talk about the money.

就該是談錢的時候了。

You might be thinking, "My partner and I don't need to talk.

你可能會想： 「我和我的伴侶不需要談。

My partner takes care of the money," or vice versa.

我的伴侶負責管錢。」或者反過來。

But a 2018 study of heterosexual couples shows that in these situations,

但 2018 年一項對 異性戀夫妻的研究發現，

在這些情況下，

the partner who takes on all of the responsibility,

全權負責的那一半，

the one who manages all of the financial tasks,

管理所有財務的那一半，

they become more and more proficient at financial management over time.

會隨著時間越來越精通財務管理。

But the other person,

但另一半，

the person who has given up all of their financial responsibilities,

放棄所有財務責任的那個人，

their financial management capabilities decline over time.

財務管理能力會隨時間下降。

如果出狀況了呢？

And what if something happens?

Maybe you break up, maybe it doesn't work out,

也許你們分手了，也許婚姻行不通，

or, God forbid, maybe your spouse dies too early.

或者，但願不要，你的配偶太早逝。

If the person who wasn't responsible for the money management

如果不負責管錢的那一半 最後落得靠自己一個人，

ends up on their own,

that person oftentimes struggles to regain their financial skills,

這個人要找回財務技能 通常會十分辛苦，

making it more and more difficult

讓他們越來越難 獨自一人在世界上生活。

for them to navigate the world alone.

And 75 percent of the time,

有 75% 的機率，

it's the women who outlive the men.

女性會活得比男性久。

For the partner who hasn't taken on the money management role,

對於沒有扮演管錢角色的那一半，

it's like forgetting a foreign language:

就像是忘記學過的外語：

when you stop using it,

當你不再使用它，

you lose some of your ability to understand and communicate in it.

你就會失去一些了解它 和用它溝通的能力。

But if you keep that financial immersion going,

但如果你持續投入在財務中，

so does your fluency.

流利度也會維持。

Being open about your finances can be very scary,

開放自己的財務可能會很讓人不安，

but it can also be very rewarding.

但也可能很值得。

Experiments have shown that shared vulnerability

實驗顯示，分享自己的脆弱，

establishes a greater sense of trust, cooperation

更能夠在關係中建立信任、

and intimacy in relationships.

合作，和親密感。

So to get you started,

為了讓大家知道怎麼起步， 我和幾位同事

I, along with a couple of colleagues,

developed a list of 10 conversation starters.

建立了一份清單， 列出十種開始談話的方式。

Here are just three.

以下是其中三種。第一：

Number one:

What are your long-term financial goals?

你們的長期財務目標是什麼？ 你們想要一起達成什麼？

What do you want to accomplish together?

Number two:

第二：你如何衡量 你在財務上的成功？

How do you measure your financial success?

Is it a house with a white picket fence,

是要擁有一棟有白色籬笆的房子？

or is it having the ability to live anywhere around the globe?

還是有能力在世界上任何地方生活？

Number three:

第三：如果可以改變你父母

What's the one thing you wish your parents would have done differently financially?

在財務上所做的一件事， 你希望是哪件事？

As a university study found,

一項大學研究發現，

it's important to answer these questions together

很重要的是要一起回答這些問題，

because joint decision-making,

因為聯合做決策，

making decisions as a couple,

夫妻一起做決策，

oftentimes results in taking fewer risks

通常結果是能冒較少的風險，

that in turn can lead to higher savings.

因此就能有較高的儲蓄。

Now, I'm sure you intuitively understand

我相信你從直覺上能理解

that open, honest conversations with your better half are beneficial.

和另一半做開放、 誠實的談話是有益的，

And I understand that it's difficult to get started,

我知道踏出第一步很難，

especially when talking about money.

特別是要談錢的時候。

But a great first step is just to put some time on the calendar

但，很好的第一步 就是在日曆上選個時間，

so that you two can have a nice financial chat.

讓你們兩人坐下來好好聊財務。

Take out your phone right now,

現在就把你的手機拿出來，

set the calendar invite.

設定日曆邀請。

Your future self will thank you.

未來的你會很感謝你。