The Surprising Psychology Behind Your Urge to Break the Rules | Paul Bloom | TED

102,689 views ・ 2023-03-20

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About 1,600 years ago,
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St. Augustine wrote "The Confessions,"
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which was the story of his youthful descent into sin
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and his later conversion to Christianity.
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And book two of “The Confessions” has a great beginning:
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"I propose now to set down my past wickedness
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and a carnal corruption of my soul."
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So you expect sex.
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(Laughter)
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But to the disappointment of readers over the centuries,
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the sin that Augustine talks about... isn’t carnal at all.
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It has to do with pears.
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He and his friends break into an orchard
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and they steal some pears.
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And that was it.
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They didn’t have anything against the person who owned the orchard.
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They weren’t hungry; they threw the pears to pigs.
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What stunned Augustine and disturbed him
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was that he seemed to be motivated by a desire just to do wrong.
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He writes, "If any part of one of those pears passed my lips,
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it was the sin that gave it flavor.
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I had no motivation for wickedness except wickedness itself.
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I was foul and I loved it."
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(Laughter)
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Now I'm a psychologist
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and I was interested in real-life stories of perverse actions,
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so I started The Perversity Project
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where I invited people to send me stories about perverse things that they did.
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I defined these acts as
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"when you choose to do something you know is wrong,
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morally or otherwise,
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at least, in part, because it's wrong."
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So one of the first stories I got was,
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"Flirted with a woman's boyfriend knowing fully well he liked me.
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I knew I could steal him if I wanted, but I didn't want to do that.
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I just wanted her to feel uncomfortable
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whenever the three of us were in the same room."
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(Laughter)
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"Causing people pain is wrong, but that's exactly why I did it."
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And in fact, this is the plot of the Dolly Parton song "Jolene."
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(Laughter)
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Sometimes it's self destructive.
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A young man wrote to me, "Ice skating on a pond,
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dark unfrozen spot 30 yards out,
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instead of avoiding it, I skate towards it,
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knowing but wondering, knowing but wondering...
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and splash!"
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(Laughter)
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Now psychologists have long been interested
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in these sort of violent, disruptive, perverse acts
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and the kinds of people who do them.
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An example people often give is the Joker from the “Batman” comics.
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In Christopher Nolan's film "The Dark Knight,"
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Alfred, Batman’s butler, describes the Joker by saying,
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"Some men can't be bought, bullied, reasoned or negotiated with.
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Some men just want to watch the world burn."
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And psychologists have thought up a "need for chaos" scale
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that gives you a bunch of statements
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and how much you agree with them
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will tell you how much you want to watch the world burn.
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So do this quietly in your head.
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"I need chaos around me.
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It's too boring if nothing is going on."
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"Sometimes I just like destroying beautiful things."
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But not all the stories I got had that kind of nature.
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Some were a little bit more benign.
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Here's one of my favorites.
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"On one occasion in my early 20s, I was out with a friend.
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He decided to get himself an ice cream
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and before he had a chance to try it, I stuck my finger in it."
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(Laughter)
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"I tried to play it off as a joke,
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but really I had the sudden thought,
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’Man, it would be -- messed up
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if I just jammed my finger in his ice cream.'"
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Someone else wrote me, "When I was in a professional choir,
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at every concert,
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I felt the desire to sing a few notes very incorrectly on purpose.
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To this day, I don't completely understand why."
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Someone else wrote me, and this is kind of the sweetest, saddest
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little example of modest perversity:
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“Sometimes I walk on the grass instead of the path
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just because I know it's wrong."
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(Laughter)
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Now a lot of perversity makes the world worse.
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I wouldn't want an Uber driver
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who scores high on a "need for chaos" scale.
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And I don't want a friend or a colleague either.
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But sometimes, I'll suggest to you,
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perversity can be clever, creative, beautiful.
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And there are some examples from art.
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There was an illustrious art exhibition in New York City in 1917, and they said,
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"You could send in anything you want, we'll accept everything."
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So Marcel Duchamp sent in a urinal, described [as] a fountain,
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and they rejected it.
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They said, "No, no, we just accept artwork."
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But Duchamp insisted it was artwork
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and the resulting controversy turned out to be one of the pivotal moments
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in the history of modern art.
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Or take Banksy.
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A few years ago,
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Banksy sold a painting “Girl with Balloon” at Sotheby’s, at auction,
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and he set up the frame so that the moment the painting was sold,
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the moment the gavel went "boom,"
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a machine in the frame shredded the painting halfway through,
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horrifying the audience.
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But... getting on the front pages of newspapers all over the world.
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Later on, describing it, Banksy quotes a Russian anarchist who says,
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"The urge to destroy is also a creative urge."
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Or take comedy.
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Perversity is part and parcel of comedy.
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So much of what's funny
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is when people do things that are irrational or immoral.
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In the right hands, perversity is such a source of joy.
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Perversity can also be powerful.
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Rory Sutherland wrote,
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"Irrational people are much more powerful than rational people."
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He gave two reasons why this is so.
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The first is, their threats are so much more convincing.
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Suppose I'm in a confrontation with you
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and you threaten me
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and you’re a rational, reasonable... person.
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So I know your threats ...
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Woman: Ehh.
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(Laughter)
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PB: Well, I know your threats are going to be normal, proportional and reasonable.
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But, if as somebody is hinting here, you’re a perverse agent,
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I have no idea what you're capable of
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and you're far more frightening to me.
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Second reason is, if you're wholly predictable,
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people learn to hack you.
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So again, if you're rational and I have to outsmart you,
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figure out what you're going to do next,
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I figure you’ll do the rational thing.
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If you're perverse, you're harder to predict.
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And so harder to hack.
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Edgar Allan Poe, describing perversity,
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described, talked about imps,
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little magical demons in our heads that cause us to do terrible things.
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But like I said, I'm a psychologist, I don't believe in imps.
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I think what we do has reasons, has motivations.
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And I think for perverse actions there is a range of them.
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One of them was mentioned by Augustine.
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So later on, after describing the incident with the pears, he writes,
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"I would not have done it by myself.
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My satisfaction did not lie in the pears, it lay in the crime itself,
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committed in league with a gang of sinners."
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The social force drove him.
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And there are other things, too.
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One force that really interests me
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goes under many names: self-governance, freedom,
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liberty, agency.
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Call it autonomy.
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Call it a desire to be free to do what you want,
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free of the constraints of other people
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and free also of the constraints of rationality and morality.
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And Jonah Berger gives a nice example of this.
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He talks about the Tide Pod challenge of a few years ago,
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where many teenagers,
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instead of using these as detergent products,
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bit into them and sometimes consumed them.
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Now, as you might imagine,
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Procter and Gamble, who own the products,
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were incredibly unhappy about this
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and they set up an extremely expensive ad campaign
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designed to stop people from consuming these products.
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And one of their campaigns involved a ... popular football player
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known as Gronk.
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So the ad would begin,
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"Hey, Gronk, is eating the pods ever a good idea?"
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And Gronk responds, "No, no, no."
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Berger points out, when this ad came up,
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consumption of the pots shot up.
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(Laughter)
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Not down.
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"Nobody's going to tell me what to do.
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Who is this Gronk telling me what to do?
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I want to be an autonomous, free being."
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And psychologists call this reactance.
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This means it's "an unpleasant feeling
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that emerges when people experience a threat to
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or loss of their free behaviors."
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And there's a wealth of laboratory studies looking at reactance.
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So they test the idea
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that what you try to do is reestablish the threatened freedom.
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And so one of the studies, for instance, looks at binge-drinking ads
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and finds that when binge drinking ads are particularly heavy-handed,
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people often respond by drinking more. ...
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"I'm going to reestablish my freedom."
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"I'm going to do what I want."
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Or take threats of reprisal.
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There's a lovely study by a team of political scientists
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which asked you, asked the subjects,
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to imagine that they’re an ambassador to a country
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and they're deciding whether or not to have sanctions
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towards that country.
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In one condition, the dictator says
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"If you do sanctions towards our country, that's OK, I won't do anything."
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In the second condition, the dictator says,
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"If you do sanctions towards our country,
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I will unleash terrorist attacks against you."
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What's the stunning finding from this is that in the second condition,
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not the first,
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they were more likely to do it.
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A lot of our perverse actions are in response to people
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telling us not to do what we want to do,
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and it makes us want all the more to do that thing.
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I think there are two lessons from the study of perversity.
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One is to appreciate its role in everyday life.
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It's really worth knowing that there are people out there
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who really do want to watch the world burn.
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And I think it's also worth knowing that each and every one of us,
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at some point in our life,
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wants to watch the world burn at least a little bit.
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(Laughter)
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I think it's worth knowing,
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at least for consequential decisions like choosing who to vote for,
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that people aren't just motivated by material self-interest
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or by an affiliation to social and political group.
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Sometimes people want to be autonomous beings,
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they want to be free.
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And telling these people, "What you're doing is stupid,"
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"what you're doing is irrational,"
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"what you're doing is immoral,"
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can have the paradoxical effect of motivating them to do
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exactly what you don't want them to do.
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The second lesson of perversity has to do with our everyday lives.
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A lot of perversity is awful.
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I think the world would be better off without it.
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But I think we've seen a little bit that perversity could be funny.
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It could be clever.
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I think it can make the world a better place.
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And so I guess I'd suggest
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that a life with a little bit of perversity in it,
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a life where sometimes you put your finger into your friend's ice cream,
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is a life that's a lot more interesting.
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Thank you.
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(Applause)
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