How to Squeeze All the Juice Out of Retirement | Riley Moynes | TED

翻译人员: coco za 校对人员: Yan Li Xiao

Everyone says you have to get ready to retire financially.

人人都说你必须 为退休做好财务上的准备。

And of course you do.

当然你也会这样做。

But what they don't tell you

但他们不会告诉你

is that you also have to get ready psychologically.

你心理上也得做好准备。

Who knew?

而这谁又知道呢？

But it's important for a couple of reasons.

做好心理准备很重要。 原因如下：

First, 10,000 North Americans will retire today

首先，今天北美 有 1 万名老人退休，

and every day for the next 10 to 15 years.

未来 10 到 15 年，天天如此。

This is a retirement tsunami.

这将是一场“退休海啸”。

And when these folks come crashing onto the beach,

而当这些人 “拍在沙滩上”的时候，

a lot of them are going to feel like fish out of water,

他们中的很多人将会感觉 像离开了水的鱼。

without a clue as to what to expect.

毫无头绪，不知道该期待什么。

Secondly, it's important because there is a very good chance

第二，这很重要 因为非常有可能

that you will live one third of your life in retirement.

你生命中的三分之一 将在退休后度过。

So it's important that you have a heads up

因此，重要的是， 你要有一个清醒的认识

to the fact that there will be significant psychological changes

你将会经历 显著的心理变化

and challenges that come with it.

以及随之而来的挑战。

I belong to a walking group that meets early three mornings a week.

我参加了一个步行小组 每周有三个早晨聚会。

Our primary goal is to put 10,000 steps on our Fitbits,

我们的主要目标 是在我们的 Fitbits 上记录 10000 步。

and then we go for coffee and cinnamon buns more importantly.

然后，更重要的是，我们去喝咖啡 和吃肉桂面包。

(Laughter and applause)

(笑声和掌声)

So we've gotten the habit of, as we walk,

所以我们已经养成了这样的习惯， 在我们走路的时候，

we've gotten the habit of choosing a topic for discussion.

我们选择一个讨论的话题。

And one day the topic was,

而有一天，这个话题是

how do you squeeze all the juice out of retirement?

怎样活出最精彩的退休生活？

How's that for seven o'clock in the morning?

早上七点的时候，怎么样？

(Laughter)

（笑声）

So we walk and we talk, and the next day we go on to the next topic.

所以我们边走边谈，第二天 我们继续下一个话题。

But the question stayed with me

但这个问题一直困扰着我

because I was really having some challenges with retirement.

因为我当时真的面临着 一些退休带来的挑战。

I was busy enough,

我过去已经够忙了。

but I really didn't feel that I was doing very much

但我真的不觉得 我做了很多

that was significant or important.

有意义的或重要的事情。

I was really struggling.

我当时真的很纠结。

I thought I had a pretty good idea of what success looked like

在工作生涯中， 关于成功是什么样子的

in a working career,

我以为我相当清楚。

but when it came to retirement, it was fuzzier for me.

但当退休来临时， 想法又变得模糊起来。

So I decided to dig deeper.

所以我决定更深入地挖掘。

And what I discovered was that much of the material on retirement

我发现的是，许多 退休方面的材料

focuses on the financial and/or the estate side of things.

着重于金融 以及/或者财产方面的事情。

And of course, they're both important,

当然，它们都很重要。

but just not what I was looking for.

但不是我所寻找的。

So I interviewed dozens and dozens of retirees

所以我采访了几十位 退休人员，

and I asked them the question:

我问他们如下问题：

how do you squeeze all the juice out of retirement?

怎样活出最精彩的退休生活？

What I discovered was that there is a framework

我发现的是 有一个框架

that can help make sense of it all.

可以帮助理解这一切。

And that's what I want to share with you today.

而这正是我今天想 要与你们分享的。

You see, there are four distinct phases

你看，有四个不同

that most of us move through in retirement.

我们中的大多数人 在退休后都会经历的阶段。

And as you'll see, it's not always a smooth ride.

正如你将看到的那样。 它并不总是一帆风顺的。

In the next few minutes,

在接下来的几分钟里。

you’ll recognize which phase you’re in, if you’re retired.

如果你已经退休了的话， 你会认识到你处于哪个阶段。

And if you’re not,

而如果你还没有退休，

you'll have a better idea of what to expect when that time comes.

等你退休后你会更加了解该怎么做。

And best of all, you'll know that there is a phase four.

而且最重要的是，你会知道 有第四阶段。

The most gratifying, satisfying of the four phases,

四个阶段里最令人高兴的， 令人满意的那个阶段，

and that's where you can squeeze all the juice out of retirement.

而那正是你可以 活得最精彩的那个阶段。

Phase one is the vacation phase, and that's just what it's like.

第一阶段是度假阶段， 就像度假一样。

You wake up when you want, you do what you want all day.

你想起床的时候就起床， 你整天做你想做的事。

And the best part is that there is no set routine.

最好的部分是 没有固定的程序。

For most people, phase one represents their view of an ideal retirement.

对于大多数人来说，第一阶段代表了 他们对理想的退休生活的看法。

Relaxing, fun in the sun, freedom, baby.

放松，在阳光下玩耍，自由，宝贝。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

And for most folks, phase one lasts for about a year or so.

而对于大多数人来说，第一阶段会持续 大约一年左右的时间。

And then strangely, it begins to lose its luster.

然后很奇怪， 它开始失去它的魅力。

We begin to feel a bit bored.

我们开始觉得有点无聊。

We actually miss our routine.

我们实际上是在怀念 我们有规律的日常生活。

Something in us seems to need one.

我们身上的某些东西似乎需要它们。

And we ask ourselves,

而我们问自己

"Is that all there is to retirement?"

这就是退休生活的全部内容吗？

Now when these thoughts and feelings start to bubble up,

当这些想法和感觉 开始涌现出来。

you have already moved into phase two.

你已经进入了第二阶段。

Phase two is when we feel loss and we feel lost.

第二阶段是当我们感到 损失，我们感到失落。

Phase two is when we lose the big five,

第二阶段我们 会感到失去了“五大损失”、

significant losses all associated with retirement.

所有与退休有关的重大损失。

We lose that routine.

我们失去了那种常规。

We lose a sense of identity.

我们失去了认同感。

We lose many of the relationships that we had established at work.

我们失去了许多 在工作中建立的关系。

We lose a sense of purpose,

我们失去了目标感。

and for some people, there's a loss of power.

而对一些人来说，失去权力。

Now we don't see these things coming.

现在我们看不到这些东西了。

We didn’t see these losses coming, and because they happen all at once,

我们没有预见到这些损失。 而且因为它们一下子就发生了。

it’s like, poof, gone.

就像，噗的一声，消失了。

It's traumatic.

这是个创伤性的问题。

Phase two is also when we come face-to-face with the three Ds:

第二阶段也是当我们 和“3个D”面对面的时候：

divorce,

离婚，

depression

抑郁，

and decline, both physical and mental.

和衰老， 包括身体和精神方面的。

The result of all of this

这一切的结果

is that we can feel like we've been hit by a bus.

导致我们感觉 像被一辆公共汽车撞了。

You see, before we can appreciate and enjoy some of the positive aspects

你看，在我们能够欣赏 和享受与第 3 阶段和第 4 阶段有关的

associated with phase three and four,

一些积极的方面之前，

you are going to, in phase two, feel fear,

在第二阶段，你将会感到恐惧。

anxiety and quite even depression.

焦虑，甚至是抑郁。

That's just the way it is.

这就是事情的真相。

So buckle up, get ready.

所以系好安全带，做好准备。

Fortunately, at some point, most of us say to ourselves,

幸运的是，在某些时候 我们大多数人都对自己说。

"Hey, I can't go on like this.

“嘿，我不能再这样下去了。

I don't want to spend the rest of my life,

我不想像这样度过我的余生，

perhaps 30 years, feeling like this."

也许 30 年。”

And when we do, we've turned a corner to phase three.

而当我们这样做的时候，我们已经转过 一个转角，进入第三阶段。

Phase three is a time of trial and error.

第三阶段是一个试错的时期。

In phase three, we ask ourselves,

在第三阶段，我们问自己。

“How can I make my life meaningful again?

“我怎样才能让我的生活 重新变得有意义呢？

How can I contribute?”

我怎样才能做出贡献？”

The answer often is to do things that you love to do and do really well.

答案往往是做一些 你喜欢做的事情，而且做得非常好。

But phase three can also deliver some disappointment and failure.

但第三阶段也会带来 一些失望和失败。

For example,

比如，

I spent a couple of years serving on a condo board

我花了几年的时间 在一个公寓委员会任职

until I finally got tired of being yelled at.

直到我终于厌倦了被骂。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

You see, one year the board decided that we were going to plant daffodils

你看，有一年，董事会决定 我们要种植水仙花

rather than the traditional daisies,

而不是传统的雏菊。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

and we got yelled at.

而我们被骂了。

Go figure.

去找一找。

I thought about law school,

我想到了去学法律，

thinking perhaps of becoming a paralegal.

我想也许可以成为一名律师助理。

And then I completed a program on dispute resolution.

然后我完成了一个 关于解决争端的项目，

It all went nowhere.

不过这一切都无疾而终。

I love to write.

我喜欢写作。

So I created a program called Getting Started on Your Memoirs.

所以我创建了一个项目 叫做 “开始写你的回忆录“。

That program has met with "limited success."

该计划已经 有着 “有限的成功“。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

It's been a rocky road for me, too.

对我来说，这也是一条坎坷的道路。

And I told you to buckle up.

我还告诉你要系好安全带。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

Now, I know all this can sound bad.

现在，我知道这一切 可能听起来很糟糕。

But it's really important to keep trying and experimenting

但这真的很重要 继续尝试和实验，

with different activities that'll make you want to get up in the morning again,

实验不同的活动，这将使你 想在早上再次起床。

because if you don't,

因为如果你不这样做。

there's a real good chance of slipping back into phase two,

很可能你会 溜回第二阶段，

feeling like you've been hit by a bus,

感觉就像你被一辆巴士撞了。

and that is not a happy prospect.

而这并不是一个令人快乐的前景。

Not everyone breaks through to phase four.

不是每个人都能突破到第四阶段。

But those who do are some of the happiest people

但那些做到的人是一些

I have ever met.

我所见过的最幸福的人。

Phase four is a time to reinvent and rewire.

第四阶段是 彻底改变和重新连接的一个阶段，

But phase four involves answering some tough questions, too.

但第四阶段也涉及回答 一些棘手的问题。

Like what's the purpose here?

比如存在的目的是什么？

What's my mission?

我的使命是什么？

How can I squeeze all the juice out of retirement?

我怎样才能活出 最精彩的退休生活？

You see, it's important that we find activities

你看，重要的是 我们要找到

that are meaningful to us

对我们来说

and that give us a sense of accomplishment.

有意义的活动。

And my experience is that it almost always involves service to others.

而我的经验是，它几乎 总是涉及到服务他人。

Maybe it's helping a charity that you care about.

也许是帮助一个你关心的慈善机构。

Maybe you'll be like the old coots.

也许你会像那些老顽童一样。

Yeah, these folks took a booth in the local farmers market

是的，这些人在当地的 农贸市场摆了一个摊位，

and were prepared to give their advice

然后基于他们多年的经验

based on their vast years of experience

准备对任何一个路过的人

to anyone who came by.

给出他们的建议。

Or maybe you'll be like my friend Bill.

或者，你会像我的朋友比尔一样。

I met Bill a few years ago in a 55-plus activity group.

几年前我在一个 55 岁以上的 活动小组里遇到比尔。

In the summer, we golf together

在夏天，我们一起打高尔夫球

and walk together and bicycle together,

并一起散步，一起骑自行车。

and in the winter we curl.

在冬天，我们猫在一起。

But Bill had this idea that we should exercise our brains as well.

但比尔认为我们应该 锻炼我们的大脑。

He believed that there was a tremendous pool

他认为

of expertise and experience in our group.

我们小组的人有 丰富专业知识和经验。

And so he approached a number of folks

因此，他联系了一些人

and asked if they would volunteer to teach some of the things

并询问他们是否愿意自愿 教给别人一些

that they love to do to others.

他们喜欢做的事情，

And almost invariably they agreed.

而他们几乎无一例外地同意了。

Bill himself taught two sessions,

比尔自己教了两节课。

one on iPads and one on iPhones.

一节关于 iPad ， 一节关于iPhone。

Because we were smart enough to know

因为我们足够聪明地知道

that a number of our members had been given these things

我们的一些成员 已经得到了这些电子设备

as gifts at Christmas by their children

作为他们的孩子 在圣诞节给他们的礼物，

and that they barely knew how to turn them on.

而且他们几乎不知道 如何打开它们。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

The first year we offered nine programs

第一年我们提供了九个项目，

and there were 200 folks signed up.

并有 200 人报名参加。

The next year, that number expanded to 45 programs

第二年，这个数字 扩大到 45 个项目，

with over 700 folks participating.

有超过 700 人参加。

And the following year we offered over 90 programs

而在接下来的一年里 我们提供了超过 90 个项目

and had 2,100 registrations.

并有 2100 名注册者。

Amazing.

真了不起。

(Applause)

（鼓掌）

That was Bill.

那是比尔。

Our members taught us to play bridge and mahjong.

我们的成员教我们打 桥牌和麻将。

They taught us to paint.

他们教我们画画。

They taught us to repair our bicycles.

他们教我们修理自行车。

We tutored and mentored local school kids.

我们辅导和指导当地学校的孩子。

We set up English as a second language programs for newcomers.

我们为新来者设立了英语 作为第二语言的项目。

We had book clubs, we had film clubs,

我们有读书俱乐部， 我们有电影俱乐部。

we even had a few golf clubs.

我们甚至有一些高尔夫俱乐部。

Exhausting, but exhilarating.

令人疲惫，但也令人振奋。

That's what's possible in phase four.

这就是第四阶段的可能。

And do you remember the five losses

而你还记得那五大损失吗？

that we talked about in phase two?

我们在第二阶段谈到的？

Loss of our routine and identity and relationships

失去了我们的常规、身份、 关系、

and purpose and power.

目的和权力。

In phase four, these are all recovered.

在第四阶段，这些都被恢复了。

It is magic to see.

真是神奇。

Magic.

像魔法一样。

So I urge you to enjoy your vacation in phase one.

所以我劝你享受 你在第一阶段的假期。

(Laughter)

（笑声）

Be prepared for the losses in phase two.

对第二阶段的损失做好心理准备。

Experiment and try as many different things as you can

在第三阶段

in phase three.

实验和尝试尽可能多的 不同的事物，

And squeeze all the juice out of retirement

并在第四阶段活出最精彩的

in phase four.

退休生活。

(Applause)

（掌声）