How to break bad management habits before they reach the next generation of leaders | Elizabeth Lyle

177,174 views

2019-01-23 ・ TED


New videos

How to break bad management habits before they reach the next generation of leaders | Elizabeth Lyle

177,174 views ・ 2019-01-23

TED


Please double-click on the English subtitles below to play the video.

00:13
I am guilty of stacking my dishes in the sink
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and leaving them there for hours.
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I fact-checked this with my boyfriend.
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He says it's less like hours and more like days,
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but that's not the point.
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The point is sometimes I don't finish the job
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until the stack has gotten high enough that it's peaking over the lip of the sink
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and my inner clean freak loses it.
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This charming habit developed when I was in college,
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and I had tons of excuses.
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"I'm running to class!"
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"What's one more dirty dish in the sink?"
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Or my favorite, "I think I can save time and water
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if I do them all together later."
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(Laughter)
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But it's not like I needed those excuses, because nobody was calling me on it.
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I wish they had.
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I look back now
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and realize that every time I didn't put a dish in the dishwasher
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and finish what I started,
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it became more second nature to me,
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and I grew less likely to question why I was doing it.
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Today, I'm a 30-something, certified dirty-dish leaver,
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and breaking this habit is hard.
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So when I'm not at home avoiding the sink,
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I work with large, complex organizations on leadership transformation
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in times of change.
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My job is to work with the most senior leaders
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to examine how they lead today
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and establish habits better suited for the future.
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But what interests me more than senior leaders these days
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is what's going on with the junior ones.
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We call them "middle managers,"
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but it's a term I wish we could change
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because what they are is our pipeline of future talent for the C-suite,
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and they are starting to leave their dishes in the sink.
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While organizations are hiring people like me
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to redevelop their senior leaders for the future,
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outdated leadership habits are forming right before our eyes
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among the middle managers who will one day take their place.
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We need middle managers and senior leaders to work together,
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because this is a big problem.
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Organizations are evolving rapidly,
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and they're counting on their future leaders
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to lead with more speed, flexibility, trust and cooperation than they do today.
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I believe there is a window of time in the formative middle-manager years
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when we can lay the groundwork for that kind of leadership,
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but we're missing it.
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Why?
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Because our future leaders are learning from senior role models
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who just aren't ready to role model yet,
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much less change the systems that made them so successful.
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We need middle managers and senior leaders to work together
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to define a new way of leading
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and develop each other to rise to the occasion.
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One of my favorite senior clients --
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we'll call her Jane --
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is a poster child for what's old-fashioned in leadership today.
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She rose to her C-level position
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based on exceptional individual performance.
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Come hell or high water, Jane got the job done,
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and today, she leads like it.
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She is tough to please,
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she doesn't have a lot of time for things that's aren't mission-critical,
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and she really doesn't trust anyone's judgment more than her own.
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Needless to say, Jane's in behavior boot camp.
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Those deeply ingrained habits
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are deeply inconsistent with where her organization is heading.
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The command-and-control behavior that she was once rewarded for
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just isn't going to work
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in a faster-moving, flatter, more digitally interconnected organization.
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What got her here won't get her there.
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But I want to talk about John,
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a supertalented, up-and-coming manager who works for Jane,
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because her habits are rubbing off on him.
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Recently, he and I were strategizing
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about a decision we needed to put in front of the CEO, Jane's boss,
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and the rest of Jane's peers.
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He said to me, "Liz, you're not going to like this,
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but the way decisions get made around here
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is with a bunch of meetings before the meeting."
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I counted.
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That was going to mean eight one-on-ones, exec by exec,
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to make sure each one of them was individually on board enough
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that things would go smoothly in the actual meeting.
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He promised, "It's not how we'll do things in the future,
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but it's how we have to do them today."
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John wasn't wrong on either count.
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Meetings before the meeting are a necessary evil
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in his company today,
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and I didn't like it at all.
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Sure, it was going to be inefficient and annoying,
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but what bothered me most was his confidence
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that it's not how they'll do things in the future.
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How could he be sure?
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Who was going to change it and when, if it wasn't him and now?
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What would the trigger be?
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And when it happened,
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would he even know how to have effective meetings without pre-meetings?
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He was confidently implying that when he's the boss,
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he'll change the rules and do things differently,
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but all I could see were dishes stacking in the sink
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and a guy with a lot of good excuses.
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Worse, a guy who might be out of a job one day
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because he learned too late how to lead
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in the organizations of tomorrow.
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These stories really get to me
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when it's the fast-track, high-potential managers like John
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because they're probably the most capable of making waves
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and redefining how leaders lead from the inside.
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But what we find is that they're often doing the best job at not rocking the boat
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and challenging the system
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because they're trying to impress
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and make life easier on the senior leaders who will promote them.
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As someone who also likes to get promoted,
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I can hardly blame him.
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It's a catch-22.
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But they're also so self-assured
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that they'll be able to change their behavior
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once they've earned the authority to do things differently,
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and that is a trap.
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Because if I've learned anything from working with Jane,
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it's that when that day comes,
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John will wonder how he could possibly do anything differently
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in his high-stakes, high-pressure executive job
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without risking his own success and the organization's,
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and he'll wish it didn't feel so safe and so easy
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to keep doing things the way they've always been done.
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So the leadership development expert in me asks:
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How can we better intervene in the formative years
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of our soon-to-be senior leaders?
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How can we use the fact that John and his peers want to take charge
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of their professional destinies
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and get them ready to lead the organizations of the future,
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rather than let them succumb to the catch-22
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that will perfectly prepare them to lead the organizations of the past?
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We'll have to start by coming to terms with a very real paradox,
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which is this:
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the best form of learning happens on the job --
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not in a classroom, not via e-modules.
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And the two things we rely on to shape on-the-job learning
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are role models and work environments.
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And as we just talked about,
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our role models are in behavior boot camp right now,
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and our work environments are undergoing unprecedented disruption.
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We are systematically changing just about everything
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about how organizations work,
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but by and large, still measuring and rewarding behavior
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based on old metrics,
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because changing those systems takes time.
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So, if we can't fully count on role models or the system right now,
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it's on John to not miss this critical development window.
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Yes, he'll need Jane's help to do it,
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but the responsibility is his because the risks are actually his.
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Either he inherits an organization that is failing
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because of stubbornly old-fashioned leadership,
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or he himself fails to build the capabilities to lead one
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that transformed while he was playing it safe.
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So now the question is, where does John start?
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If I were John, I'd ask to start flying the plane.
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For my 13th birthday, my grandpa, a former Navy pilot,
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gave me the gift of being able to fly a very small plane.
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Once we were safely airborne,
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the pilot turned over the controls, folded his hands,
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and he let me fly.
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It was totally terrifying.
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It was exhilarating, but it was also on-the-job learning with a safety net.
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And because it was real,
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I really learned how to do it myself.
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Likewise, in the workplace, every meeting to be led,
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every decision to be made
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can be a practice flight
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for someone who could really use the learning experience
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and the chance to figure out how to do it their own way.
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So instead of caving, John needs to knock on Jane's door,
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propose a creative strategy
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for having the meeting without the eight pre-meetings,
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show her he's thought through the trade-offs
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and ask for her support to do it differently.
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This isn't going to be easy for Jane.
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Not only does she need to trust John,
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she needs to accept that with a little bit of room to try his hand at leading,
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John will inevitably start leading in some ways
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that are far more John than Jane.
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And this won't be an indictment of her.
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Rather, it will be individualism.
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It will be progress.
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And it might even be a chance for Jane to learn a thing or two
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to take her own leadership game to the next level.
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I work with another senior client who summed up this dilemma beautifully
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when we were talking about why he and his peers
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haven't empowered the folks below them with more decision rights.
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He said,
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"We haven't done it because we just don't trust
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that they're going to make the right decisions.
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But then again, how could they?
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We've just never given them decisions to practice with."
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So I'm not advocating that Jane hands over the controls
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and folds her hands indefinitely,
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but what I am saying
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is that if she doesn't engineer learning and practice
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right into John's day today,
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he'll never be able to do what she does,
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much less do it any differently than she does it.
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Finally, since we're going to be pushing both of them outside their comfort zones,
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we need some outside coaches
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to make sure this isn't a case of the blind leading the blind.
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But what if instead of using coaches
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to coach each one of them to individually be more effective,
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we started coaching the interactions between them?
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If I could wave my magic wand,
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I would have coaches sitting in the occasional team meeting
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of Jane and her direct reports,
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debriefing solely on how well they cooperated that day.
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I would put a coach in the periodic feedback session between Jane and John,
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and just like a couples' therapist coaches on communication,
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they would offer advice and observations
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on how that conversation can go better in the future.
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Was Jane simply reinforcing what Jane would have done?
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Or was Jane really helping John
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think through what to do for the organization?
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That is seriously hard mentorship to provide,
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and even the best leaders need help doing it,
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which is why we need more coaches coaching more leaders,
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more in real time
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versus any one leader behind closed doors.
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Around 20 years ago, Warren Buffet gave a school lecture
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in which he said, "The chains of habit are too light to be felt
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until they're too heavy to be broken."
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I couldn't agree more,
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and I see it happening with our future leaders in training.
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Can we and they be doing more to build their leadership capabilities
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while they're still open, eager
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and not too far gone down a path of bad habits we totally saw coming?
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I wish my college roommates and I called each other out back then
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for the dishes.
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It would have been so much easier to nip that habit in the bud
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than it is to change it today.
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But I still believe in a future for myself full of gleaming sinks
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and busy dishwashers,
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and so we're working on it,
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every day, together, moment to moment,
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one dirty dish at a time.
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Thank you.
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(Applause)
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