Daniel J. Watts: To accomplish great things, you need to "let the paint dry" | TED

Transcriber:

翻译人员: liu rebecca 校对人员: Yanyan Hong

大家好，我叫丹尼尔·J·瓦茨 （Daniel J. Watts）。

我是 2020 年（美国戏剧界最高荣誉） 托尼奖的候选人。

我也是个讲故事的人。

这是我的新颜料。

Hi there, my name is Daniel J. Watts,

嗯……

I am a 2020 Tony nominee.

嗯……

And I'm a storyteller.

（踢踏的声音）

This is my new jam.

Uh. Uh. Uh.

Uh. Uh.

(Tapping sounds)

“老兄——

你真是不让这些颜料干下来啊”，

我的一位导师有天跟我这样说。

他是用赞美的语气说的。

“是的，我想你没错。”

"Maaaaaan ...

我假装害羞地笑着答道，

You don't really let paint dry,"

我认证他这句夸奖， 并把它放在我的头上，

one of my mentors said to me one day.

He meant it as a compliment.

像个半歪的皇冠一样。

我是那种行动派的艺术家，

"Yeah, I guess you're right,"

我一直以此为荣。

I grinned back pseudo-shyly,

as I took said compliment and placed it on my head

（踢踏的声音）

like a half-cocked crown.

I've always taken pride in being the kind of artist

that's always making moves.

上次我的导师给我补课的时候，

(Tapping sounds)

那是 2019 年的七月份，

我正在拍《了不起的麦瑟尔夫人》，

还搬进了我在哈莱姆富人区的新公寓。

We were having one of our catch-up sessions, my mentor and I,

我刚从巴黎回来，

July 2019,

I, between shooting episodes of "The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel,"

只是去那玩玩。

你懂的——

and moving into my new apartment uptown in Harlem.

买点东西，逛逛博物馆，

I'd just returned from Paris.

坐在咖啡厅里看着人们走过。

就是那种——巴黎式的，

I was just going out there to hang.

You know --

shop a little, take in a couple museums,

放任自流还是什么的。

我当时不知道我的“假期” 会变成“工期”，

sit down at cafés and watch the people go by.

You know -- très parisien.

也不知道会被我的朋友 Ray 邀请一起表演，

去到那场他大放异彩的 国际黑人朋克音乐节上。

Laissez–faire and whatnot.

好吧，我可能知道一点点，

Little did I know that my vacation would turn into a work-cation,

但我不会等颜料干。

and I would be asked to perform with my friend Ray

嗯……

as he headlined at the international music festival AFROPUNK.

（踢踏的声音）

OK, I might have known a little bit.

But I wasn't going to let that paint dry.

我回来的时候，戴夫·查普尔 （Dave Chappelle）在百老汇首次登台，

Mm hmm.

在那之后有一场只有被邀请的人 才能参加的即兴音乐会。

(Tapping sounds)

我受邀参加。

我在那儿即兴演奏。

耶！

Upon my return, Dave Chappelle was making his Broadway debut,

followed by an invite-only impromptu jam session.

I had an invite.

不是大事。

I jammed at the session.

一个星期后，泰塔斯·伯吉斯 （Tituss Burgess) 的专辑发售，

Ehhhh!

有两首我参与合作，

在那两天前， “Deadline” 发表了文章：

百老汇的《蒂娜》音乐剧 找到了它的“艾克·特纳”,

That's all right.

他就是在《最后的O.G.》中联袂出演的 丹尼尔·J·瓦茨。

A week from then, Tituss Burgess's album will be released,

on which I had two features,

哦——湿着的颜料！

and two days prior, "Deadline" would announce

"Broadway's 'Tina' Musical Finds its Ike Turner

我当时还并未像这样作画过。

in 'The Last O.G.' Co-star Daniel J. Watts."

排练前的一星期，

我妈妈和我会去密西西比的 克拉克斯代尔市、

田纳西州的孟菲斯和纳特布什旅游，

Ohhhh, wet paint!

去看看小艾克·特纳当年会怎样生活，

And I had not yet started painting like this.

然后再飞回纽约 完成《了不起的麦瑟尔夫人》的拍摄，

The week before rehearsals,

很快又到达洛杉矶 参加一个专辑的发布音乐会，

my mother and I would travel to Clarksdale, Mississippi.

再回到纽约开始《蒂娜》的排练。

Memphis, Tennessee, and Nutbush, Tennessee,

to see how a younger Ike Turner might have maneuvered through life,

四周用来排练，

then back to NYC to finish shooting "Maisel,"

三周技术加工，

then a quick trip to L.A. for an album release concert,

再来四周用于预演。

then back to New York City to start "Tina" rehearsal.

这就到了十一月了， 首映礼之夜到来。

我的家人，包括我妈妈、两位阿姨、

Four weeks of rehearsal,

three weeks of tech,

两位堂兄弟姐妹和我 91 岁的祖母

four more weeks of previews.

都飞到百老汇应援。

And now it's November, and it's opening night.

My family, which consists of my mother, my two aunts,

他们完全，完完全全地沉浸在了 属于南方人的骄傲

和家族的荣耀之中，

my two cousins and my 91-year-old granny

而那时正是帷幕落下，蒂娜·特纳 在 1500 人面前，

fly up to support.

佯装轻轻给了我一巴掌。

They are drenched -- drenched -- in Southern pride

（踢踏舞的声音）

and basking in familial glory

as Tina Turner pretends to give me a light smacking around at the curtain call,

那爽极了。

in front of 1,500 people.

时间很快到了感恩节， 也就是说马上圣诞了，

(Tapping sounds)

你也可以管它叫新年。

2020 新年快乐！

剧透警告： 事情开始变得脱离轨迹了，

It was awesome.

变得非常快。

但是我也不会让 这 2020 年的颜料干下来。

Skip over to Thanksgiving, which means it's basically Christmas,

so you might as well say it's a new year.

Happy New Year 2020!

Spoiler alert: things are going to get wild --

fast.

But I wasn't about to let that 2020 paint get dry.

耶……

首先，

我的单人秀表演 和每周八次的《Tina》开始冲突，

把时间占得满满的，我没有一天能休息。

Yeahhhh.

周五晚还有一场表演，

First off,

就在还有两场演出的周六的前夜。

performances of my one-man show overlap with my eight shows a week at 'Tina,'

没干的颜料，没干的颜料，没干的颜料！

fully equipped with no days off

忙到二月， 我开始感受到影响了。

and a midnight performance on a Friday night,

the night before a two-show Saturday.

一切都变得混乱起来。

Wet paint, wet paint, wet paint!

我这一年的合同才刚走完三个月，

Bleeding into February, I'm starting to feel the effects.

我就已经觉得， 我想歇着了，来个假期吧，

Everything's starting to blend.

步入三月，

承担艾克·特纳的角色 成了一件麻烦事，

I'm only three months into my one-year contract,

我分不清谁是谁的灾难。

and I'm already feeling like I need a break, I need a vacation.

我真的分不清……

Moving into March,

and now taking on the role of Ike Turner has started to take its toll,

而且有消息说这个神秘的疾病， 开始在百老汇露面。

and I can't tell whose trauma is whose.

啊，但是这幅画。

I can't tell whose trauma is hues ...

我开足马力，我马力全开。

And there's news of this mysterious illness making its Broadway debut.

因为还有托尼奖的事—— 得把那堆采访考虑进去

那意味着西装， 紫西装、蓝西装、绿西装。

Uh, but this paint, though.

你穿的真合身，我也是。

但那是防护服吗？

All cylinders are firing, I'm firing all cylinders

海蓝宝石。

because there's Tony buzz -- got to pack those interviews in! --

which means suits, purple suits, blue suits, green.

看起来这幅画快要干了的时候，

Suits you, it suits me.

And is that a hazmat suit?

我问自己：

Aquamarine.

我真的想要这一切吗？

我是说，所有的一切， 这些财富、声誉和知名度？

And as it seems the paint is beginning to dry,

因为（知名喜剧演员）大卫·查普尔 对大卫·莱特曼说，

当你越把自己当作一个名人来投资时，

I ask myself:

Do I really want all this?

你身上的真我也会越来越少。

I mean, all of this, the fortune and the fame and the celebrity?

嗯……

Because Dave Chappelle said to David Letterman

that the more you invest into yourself as a celebrity,

所以我问自己：

the less of yourself you get to own.

我真的取得什么成果了吗？

或者说，我到底在朝哪儿走呢？

Hmm.

因为我感觉我并没有长进。

就像在一个仓鼠轮子上不停奔跑，

还不知道该怎么下来。

And I asked myself:

好像我还得先征得同意，

才能做那些我知道 为了自己该做的事情。

Am I really going anywhere?

Like, what's my sense of direction?

过了很久很久以后……

Because I feel like I'm not going anywhere

这样的世界终于停摆了。

or like I'm running in place on a hamster wheel

that I don't know how to get off of.

And it's like I have to ask permission

to do the thing that I know that I need to do for myself,

and then, and then, and then, and then ...

考虑到一切瞬息万变，

The world finally stops.

我被迫停下来 得到了我十分需要的喘息，

因为那场神秘的疫情 仍未得到遏制。

虽然我知道答案不是“不久之后”，

And because everything is in flux,

但我还在不停问自己：

I am forced to take a much-needed reprieve

百老汇什么时候能恢复？

as that mysterious illness has been granted an extension.

因为虽然我非常非常 需要疫情所带来的休息，

And though I know the answer is not for a while,

我也同时非常特别格外 需要工资支票。

我一直在关注这 这场神秘疫情的情况。

I kept asking myself:

When’s Broadway coming back?

我需要这幅画干下来了。

Because even though I really, really, really need to take this break,

现在每个人震惊又迷惑， 我们的灰色变成了蓝色。

I really, really, really, really, really need a check,

我停止了一切社交活动，

and I keep checking the status on this mysterious illness

但我一直关注着新闻，

因为我在看着颜料干下来，

because I need that paint to dry now.

尽管它干的太慢，仍牵绊着我。

And now everyone's dazed and confused, our greys turned to blues.

I'm off all of the socials,

嗯……

but I stay glued to the news

because I'm watching the paint dry

时间来到了夏天。

夏天的时候，

that will not dry fast enough for me to keep going.

整个国家火热起来，

我全面恢复了社交，

Hmm.

因为我的单人秀被 挪到了线上并作出了相应改变，

Skip to the summer.

Skip to the summer,

now the country's on fire.

所以我就可以谈论艾哈迈德、 布雷诺纳和乔治·弗洛伊德的死亡。

I'm back on all the socials,

百老汇仍不知道它何时能恢复，

because my one-man show has been revived and revamped for the virtual space

但它因为过去的错事 正在被议论纷纷。

so I can comment on the death of Ahmaud, Breonna and George.

我觉得是时候离开这个城市了。

去北卡罗莱纳州呆了三周， 洛杉矶两周，波特兰一周之后，

Broadway still doesn't know when it's going to come back,

but now it's in the hot seat for all of its past transgressions.

我回到了纽约。

百老汇还是没有恢复的消息。

And I think it might be time for me to take a break from the city.

我需要一些东西 来让我不再那么关注疫情的种种。

我选择了……

Three weeks in North Carolina, two weeks in L.A., one week in Portland.

用脚来作画。

我需要一些生动而多彩的东西，

I come back to New York.

Broadway still doesn't know when it's going to come back.

这不仅仅停留在口号。

I need something to take my mind off all these pandemics,

现在我明白了 我对沉浸在色彩里着了迷。

and the next thing I know ...

I'm painting with my feet.

看着它们飞溅、旋转、融合

I needed something live and in color

that wasn't "Live and in color!"

做着人们疫情下不应该做的一切。

And now I realize I'm obsessed with diving in colors.

Watching them splatter, swirl and blend

在我正陶醉地沉浸其中的时候，

and do all the things people shouldn't be doing right now.

我突然明白，

我需要学会让这些颜料干下来。

我需要停下、

And as I'm in the midst of my deep dive,

休息，

因为如果我不这样做的话，

I realize

我的黄色和蓝色就会结合成绿色，

I had to learn how to let paint dry.

即使那不是我最想要的。

I have to stop

and take a break,

because if I don't,

然后我开始思考其他时候，

my yellows and my blues will make green,

那些我不让颜料干下来的时候，

那些我不给事情 留下疗愈的时间的时候，

even if that's not what I really, really want.

这就像我仍在跳舞， 尽管两脚扭伤，

尽管医生告诉我我需要 休息一阵儿了。

And then I started to think about all the other times

when I wasn't letting paint dry,

或是我强迫自己结束 那些破碎的关系，

when I wasn't taking time away to let things heal,

like when I was still dancing on two sprained ankles,

因为我不想去费劲修复。

或是我对我的经纪人大惊小怪

even though the doctor told me I needed to take a break for a while.

因为……因为网飞 在我的单人秀之后一周

Or when I was trying to force closure in a newly broken-up relationship

都没有给我致电抛出邀约。

because I didn't want to deal with the healing process.

我总是不给时间

Or when I fussed out my reps

以它需要的时间

because ... because Netflix haven’t called to offer me a deal

来展现它的疗效。

我总是不相信，

a week after my one-man show.

我做的已经足够多。

All the times when I didn't want time

我不需要带着更多色彩回来。

to take the time it takes

to reveal itself to me.

All the times when I didn't believe

百老汇不会恢复，

that what I had already done was enough

and that I didn't have to keep going back in with more color.

它只会向前走。

而当它做到的时候，它所用的色彩 需要呈现出更丰富的表达力。

Broadway can't come back.

It has to come forward.

不幸的是，我现在不能完成这幅画。

And when it does, it has to be more expressive with the colors that it uses.

为了去做我真正想要做的东西，

我必须让这幅画干下来。

And unfortunately, I can't finish this piece for you right now.

哦——当然这是一个

Because in order for me to do what I really want to be able to do,

我还在非常非常努力地

去学着习惯的东西。

I have to let this paint dry.

但我知道这份等待是值得的。

谢谢。

Ohhh, and that's something that I'm ...

I'm still really, really, really

learning to be OK with.

But I know it'll be worth the wait.

Thank you.