The Habit That Could Improve Your Career (and Your Life) | Paul Catchlove | TED

406,568 views ・ 2023-01-18

TED


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I wrote this journal entry in 2013.
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"I've been sleeping restlessly for months.
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There's a constant feeling of tension in my body.
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I love ministry as a Catholic priest,
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the opportunity to share my faith with people
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and support them as we journey through life together.
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But I have a desire to share my life with another person.
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I knew, in discerning ministry,
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that celibacy, not getting married, was part of the package.
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But I don't know if I can do this any longer.
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I'm rarely alone, but I feel bitterly lonely."
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I wrote this when I was on the cusp
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of making one of the biggest and most significant decisions of my life:
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whether to leave ministry as a Catholic priest.
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I think my life has been a reasonably unique and unusual one.
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Now in my early forties, I've had careers as an opera singer,
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a Catholic priest,
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a corporate lawyer,
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and now, a management consultant.
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(Laughter)
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And when people hear the careers that I've had,
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the most common question I get asked --
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maybe the one that's on your mind --
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is, “What on earth is the connection amongst it all?”
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(Laughter)
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Through all of these changes,
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through all of these careers,
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one constant has been present:
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the practice of reflection.
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Now people may think that reflection
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is something that happens in a dark, private room
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by candlelight or flashlight,
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to purge one's deepest, darkest secrets.
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But I want to bring this practice out of the dark
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and into the light.
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I want to share how this practice can help our everyday lives,
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and especially our work lives.
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I want to share how this practice helps to improve performance,
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to make better decisions, both big and small,
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and to build better relationships.
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Interestingly, in a 2020 survey of some 4,000 respondents,
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conducted by BCG and BVA,
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the question was asked,
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"What makes a good leader?
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What are their main qualities and skills?"
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Notably, possessing a good capacity for reflection
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was listed as one of the top five skills,
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the others being empathy, listening, consideration and team development.
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Reflection is about learning.
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It's about looking at the events of our lives without judgment,
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but with a critical lens.
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I really like the way leadership professors
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James Bailey and Scheherazade Rehman describe it:
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"It requires taking an honest moment to look at what transpired,
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what worked, what didn't,
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what can be done and what can't.
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Reflection requires courage.
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It's thoughtful, and it's deliberate."
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So how do we do this, then?
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Let's take a look at sports.
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I grew up in Australia,
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and one of the most popular games played was cricket.
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Consistent high performance from batters, bowlers and fielders is essential.
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But given it’s a team sport,
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it’s not just about how ... the individual performs,
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but about how the team performs collectively together.
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Cricketers reflect during a game, after a game and over time.
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During a game, they might think about a missed catch
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or how they could bat or bowl better the next delivery.
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After a game, they might come together to watch video replays,
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to look at what worked and what didn't,
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which might differ from what they actually experienced
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during the game itself.
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And then, over time, they might look to the patterns of their wins and losses,
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to glean even more meaningful conclusions and insights.
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The same process can and should be used in the workplace,
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and I don't think we need to watch video replays of our meetings
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to dissect what took place.
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(Laughter)
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I don't know about you, but that might feel kind of creepy.
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(Laughter)
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Reflection can be done through a variety of different formats:
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purposeful thinking,
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written journal entries, audio notes, pitches,
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a discussion with a mentor or honest friend.
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The point is to find what works for you
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and to make a regular commitment.
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To examine the events and experiences of your lives --
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what worked, what didn't, and why --
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and then, to think about what and how
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you would like to do things differently next time.
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When we practice reflection as a habit, we gain even more meaningful insight,
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because we see patterns that reflection on stand-alone events doesn't provide.
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I truly think reflection can help everyone --
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people in every industry, at every stage in one's career,
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and in every point in one's life.
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Let me share with you an example that I think most people can connect with.
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Most of us have meetings.
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I was due for a daily catch-up with a colleague.
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He had just led a client meeting for the first time.
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It was to give a progress update
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on the work stream he was responsible for in this project.
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He said to me that the meeting had gone terribly.
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He didn’t get through the actions taken.
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He wasn’t able to discuss the obstacles faced or the decisions required.
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He didn’t get to the next steps or the responsible persons.
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He felt
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angst, uneasy, upset.
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He was concerned about what the client had thought of him and the meeting,
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but more importantly,
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what the client felt about the work that was going on
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in the work stream.
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It would have been so easy for him to have pushed past this,
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to try and suppress the emotions,
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but that would have missed a massive opportunity.
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We took a few moments to think
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and objectively reflect over what took place,
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and then to put in place some commitments
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as to what and how he could do things differently next time.
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He decided that in [the] future,
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he would start each meeting with an agenda alignment,
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to make sure there was clarity on what needed to be achieved.
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And then, he'd resolve to make sure that he would take greater control
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over the meeting
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so that if topics came up beyond the scope of the agenda,
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that he’d note that a separate discussion should be had.
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Reflection helps to improve performance.
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Reflection helps to make better decisions.
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Imagine, for a moment,
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you've been in your current role for five years.
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It's a creative role,
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but you don't quite feel you've got that zing,
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that energy for it, anymore.
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You've been offered another opportunity in the organization.
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It’s actually a promotion. It’s a more senior role, managerial.
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But you'll have responsibility for looking after 12 direct reports.
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A competitor has also recently reached out to you.
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They've offered you an opportunity
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for the same kind of role that you've got currently,
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but it pays a higher salary.
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There's a big difference
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between being a creative and being a manager.
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So what is it that really makes you happy?
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What is it that really makes you fulfilled?
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Reflection provides a treasure trove of data
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to help you work through this.
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Have your reflections mentioned being bored with projects,
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or do you just want to try something new?
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Would you like to be a manager?
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Would you like to see people grow and form and develop them?
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Do you think you could do a better job than your own manager?
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Reflection provides great insight.
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It's easy to get lost when you've got an opportunity
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of a fancier job title and more money.
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But reflection enables you to focus on what really matters,
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and to make better choices.
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Let me share with you a final example.
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Most of us have relationships in our work --
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bosses, customers, clients, suppliers, whomever.
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And I think most of us try to have good relationships with these people.
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If I'm honest,
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while I strive for this ambition, I haven't always succeeded,
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but reflection has helped me to build better relationships.
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A number of years ago,
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I was giving a feedback session with a colleague,
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and after having done so,
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I took a few moments to jot down some thoughts
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as to how it went.
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I realized I had been too clinical.
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In fact, if only you could have seen the expressions on my colleague's face.
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(Laughter)
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I'd raced through their various strengths
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and moved onto spending more time in their areas for development.
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If I'd really thought about this person,
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I would have spent far greater time actually on their strengths,
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actually emphasizing why they were such a valuable member of our organization,
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and then, creating a space where they felt psychologically safe,
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to be able to go on and explore these areas for development.
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Reflection has helped me to improve this
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and to build better relationships.
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So this might all sound a little fine and dandy,
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and may be obvious or trivial,
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but the truth is, so many of us don't take time out for regular reflection.
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This practice has helped me
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and I am so grateful.
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After I left being a priest,
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I took some time out for reflection to think about who I was
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and what I wanted my life to be about.
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Reflection helped me to grapple with this,
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and it continues to help me today
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as I grapple with this and other topics.
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So as we end this day, or tomorrow, before you begin the next,
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sit down,
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take a breath,
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and reflect.
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And you'll see the power that this habit brings to your life.
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Thank you.
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(Cheers and applause)
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