Gossip in English & How to Deal with It โ€” Speak Confident English

63,774 views ใƒป 2019-04-03

Speak Confident English


ไธ‹ใฎ่‹ฑ่ชžๅญ—ๅน•ใ‚’ใƒ€ใƒ–ใƒซใ‚ฏใƒชใƒƒใ‚ฏใ™ใ‚‹ใจๅ‹•็”ปใ‚’ๅ†็”Ÿใงใใพใ™ใ€‚ ็ฟป่จณใ•ใ‚ŒใŸๅญ—ๅน•ใฏๆฉŸๆขฐ็ฟป่จณใงใ™ใ€‚

00:00
Hey, it's Annemarie with Speak Confident English and for this week's lesson we're
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ใ“ใ‚“ใซใกใฏใ€Speak Confident English ใฎ Annemarie ใงใ™ใ€‚ไปŠ้€ฑใฎใƒฌใƒƒใ‚นใƒณใงใฏ
00:05
going to focus on a pretty delicate topic.
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ใ€ใ‹ใชใ‚Šใƒ‡ใƒชใ‚ฑใƒผใƒˆใชใƒˆใƒ”ใƒƒใ‚ฏใซ็„ฆ็‚นใ‚’ๅฝ“ใฆใพใ™ใ€‚
00:09
We're going to focus on those conversations that usually start with something
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้€šๅธธใ€ๆฌก
00:13
like, oh my God, did you hear what she did yesterday?
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ใฎใ‚ˆใ†ใชไผš่ฉฑใ‹ใ‚‰ๅง‹ใพใ‚‹ไผš่ฉฑ ใซ็„ฆ็‚นใ‚’ๅฝ“ใฆใพใ™ใ€‚
00:17
Those words are often a hint that the next thing someone says is going to be
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ใ“ใ‚Œใ‚‰ใฎ่จ€่‘‰ใฏใ€ๅคšใใฎๅ ดๅˆใ€ ่ชฐใ‹ใŒๆฌกใซ่จ€ใ†ใ“ใจใŒใ‚ดใ‚ทใƒƒใƒ—ใซใชใ‚‹
00:23
some gossip. They're going to talk badly about somebody else. Now,
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ใจใ„ใ†ใƒ’ใƒณใƒˆใงใ™. ๅฝผใ‚‰ใฏ ไป–ไบบใฎใ“ใจใ‚’ๆ‚ชใ่จ€ใ†ใคใ‚‚ใ‚Šใงใ™ใ€‚ ใ•ใฆ
00:28
if you're like me and many others in the Confident English Community,
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ใ€ใ‚ใชใŸใŒ็งใ‚„ Confident English Community ใฎไป–ใฎๅคšใใฎไบบใจๅŒใ˜ใชใ‚‰ ใ€
00:32
you don't really like gossip.
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ใ‚ดใ‚ทใƒƒใƒ—ใฏใ‚ใพใ‚Šๅฅฝใใงใฏใ‚ใ‚Šใพใ›ใ‚“ใ€‚
00:34
You don't like participating in it and you definitely don't want to listen to
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ใ‚ใชใŸใฏใใ‚Œใซๅ‚ๅŠ ใ™ใ‚‹ใฎใŒๅฅฝใใงใฏใชใใ€ไป–ใฎไบบใฎ ่ฉฑใ‚’่žใใŸใใ‚ใ‚Šใพใ›
00:39
someone else. Talk badly about someone that you care about.
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ใ‚“. ๆฐ—ใซใชใ‚‹ไบบใฎใ“ใจใ‚’ๆ‚ชใ่จ€ใ†ใ€‚
00:43
Maybe a friend, a family member or a coworker,
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ๅ‹ไบบใ€ๅฎถๆ—ใ€ๅŒๅƒšใ‹ใ‚‚ใ—ใ‚Œใพใ›ใ‚“ใŒใ€
00:47
and what I love is that this particular lesson actually came from a question
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็งใŒๆฐ—ใซๅ…ฅใฃใฆใ„ใ‚‹ใฎใฏใ€ใ“ใฎ็‰นๅฎšใฎ ใƒฌใƒƒใ‚นใƒณใŒใ€
00:52
from someone in the Confident English Community several months ago I did a
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ๆ•ฐใ‹ๆœˆๅ‰ใซ่‹ฑ่ชžใง
00:57
lesson on how to answer uncomfortable questions in English. For example,
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ไธๅฟซใช่ณชๅ•ใซ็ญ”ใˆใ‚‹ๆ–นๆณ•ใซ้–ขใ™ใ‚‹ใƒฌใƒƒใ‚นใƒณใ‚’่กŒใฃใŸ Confident English Community ใฎ่ชฐใ‹ใ‹ใ‚‰ใฎ่ณชๅ•ใ‹ใ‚‰ๅฎŸ้š›ใซๅพ—ใ‚‰ใ‚ŒใŸใจใ„ใ†ใ“ใจใงใ™. ใŸใจใˆใฐใ€
01:02
if someone asks a rude or inappropriate question,
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่ชฐใ‹ใŒๅคฑ็คผ ใช่ณชๅ•ใ‚„ไธ้ฉๅˆ‡ใช่ณชๅ•ใ‚’ใ—
01:06
what should you say? How do you handle that situation?
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ใŸๅ ดๅˆใ€ใ‚ใชใŸใฏไฝ•ใจ็ญ”ใˆใ‚‹ในใใงใ—ใ‚‡ใ†ใ‹? ใใฎ็Šถๆณใ‚’ใฉใฎใ‚ˆใ†ใซๅ‡ฆ็†ใ—ใพใ™ใ‹๏ผŸ
01:10
And on my youtube channel and someone left a comment and they asked me to
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ใใ—ใฆใ€็งใฎYouTubeใƒใƒฃใƒณใƒใƒซใซ่ชฐใ‹ ใŒใ‚ณใƒกใƒณใƒˆใ‚’ๆฎ‹ใ—ใฆใ€
01:15
address the situation of what to do when a friend that you spend a lot of time
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ใ‚ใชใŸใŒๅคšใใฎๆ™‚้–“ใ‚’ไธ€็ท’ใซ้Žใ”ใ—ใฆใ„ใ‚‹ๅ‹ไบบใŒ
01:21
with tends to gossip about other people and you don't really like it.
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ไป–ใฎไบบใฎใ†ใ‚ใ•่ฉฑใ‚’ใ™ใ‚‹ๅ‚พๅ‘ใŒ ใ‚ใ‚Šใ€ใ‚ใชใŸใŒใใ‚Œใ‚’ใ‚ใพใ‚Šๅฅฝใใงใฏใชใ„ๅ ดๅˆใ€ใฉใ†ใ™ใ‚Œใฐใ‚ˆใ„ใ‹ใจใ„ใ†็Šถๆณใซๅฏพๅ‡ฆใ™ใ‚‹ใ‚ˆใ†ใซ็งใซๅฐ‹ใญใพใ—ใŸ.
01:26
You'd like it to stop but you're not sure how to ask her to Stop Gossiping in a
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ใ‚ใชใŸใฏใใ‚Œใ‚’ใ‚„ใ‚ใฆใปใ—ใ„ใฎใงใ™ใŒใ€ ใ†ใ‚ใ•่ฉฑใ‚’ใ‚„ใ‚ใ‚‹ใ‚ˆใ†ใซๅฝผๅฅณใซ้ ผใ‚€ๆ–นๆณ•ใŒใ‚ใ‹ใ‚Šใพใ›ใ‚“
01:33
nice way. So that is exactly what we're going to work on in this lesson.
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. ใใ‚ŒใŒใ€ใพใ•ใซ ใ“ใฎใƒฌใƒƒใ‚นใƒณใงๅ–ใ‚Š็ต„ใ‚€ใ“ใจใงใ™ใ€‚
01:50
The good news is when you want to politely or kindly ask someone to stop
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่‰ฏใ„ใƒ‹ใƒฅใƒผใ‚นใฏใ€ไป–ใฎไบบใฎใ“ใจใ‚’ๆ‚ชใ่จ€ใ†ใฎ ใ‚’ใ‚„ใ‚ใ‚‹ใ‚ˆใ†ใซไธๅฏงใซใ€ใพใŸใฏ่ฆชๅˆ‡ใซใŠ้ก˜ใ„ใ—ใŸใ„
01:56
speaking badly about somebody else,
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01:58
there are three simple strategies and in this lesson I'm going to tell you
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ๅ ดๅˆใงใ™ใ€‚3 ใคใฎ็ฐกๅ˜ใชๆˆฆ็•ฅใŒใ‚ใ‚Šใพใ™ ใ€‚ใ“ใฎใƒฌใƒƒใ‚นใƒณใงใฏใ€
02:03
exactly what those strategies are and give you some examples.
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ใใ‚Œใ‚‰ใฎๆˆฆ็•ฅใŒไฝ•ใงใ‚ใ‚‹ใ‹ใ‚’ๆญฃ็ขบใซ ่ชฌๆ˜Žใ—ใ€ใ„ใใคใ‹ใฎไพ‹ใ‚’็คบใ—ใพใ™ใ€‚
02:07
But before we do that,
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ใ—ใ‹ใ—ใ€ใใฎๅ‰ใซใ€
02:08
I also want to share with you some common language and expressions that we use
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็งใŸใกใŒ่‹ฑ่ชžใงใ‚ดใ‚ทใƒƒใƒ—ใซใคใ„ใฆ่ฉฑใ™ใŸใ‚ใซไฝฟ็”จใ™ใ‚‹ไธ€่ˆฌ็š„ใช่จ€่ชžใจ่กจ็พใ‚’ใ„ใใคใ‹็ดนไป‹ใ—ใŸใ„ใจๆ€ใ„ใพใ™
02:13
to talk about gossip in English. For example,
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. ใŸใจใˆใฐ
02:17
you might hear that someone wants to dish some dirt or chew the fat,
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ใ€่ชฐใ‹ใŒ ๆฑšใ‚Œใ‚’็šฟใซ็››ใฃใŸใ‚Šใ€่„‚่‚ชใ‚’ๅ™›ใ‚“ใ ใ‚Šใ—ใŸใ„
02:22
and what that means is they want to share some gossip with you.
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ใจ่จ€ใฃใฆใ„ใ‚‹ใจ่žใใ‹ใ‚‚ใ—ใ‚Œใพใ›ใ‚“ใŒใ€ใใ‚Œใฏๅฝผใ‚‰ ใŒใ‚ใชใŸใจใ‚ดใ‚ทใƒƒใƒ—ใ‚’ๅ…ฑๆœ‰ใ—ใŸใ„ใจใ„ใ†ใ“ใจใงใ™.
02:27
And of course when someone gossips,
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ใใ—ใฆใ‚‚ใกใ‚ใ‚“ใ€่ชฐใ‹ใŒใ†ใ‚ใ•่ฉฑ
02:29
one of the consequences is that those rumors spread to other people and we refer
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ใ‚’ใ™ใ‚‹ใจใ€ใใฎ็ตๆžœใฎ 1 ใคใฏใ€ใใฎ ๅ™‚ใŒไป–ใฎไบบใซๅบƒใพใ‚‹ใจใ„ใ†
02:36
to that as stabbing someone in the back or bad mouthing someone.
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ใ“ใจใงใ™ใ€‚
02:42
So if you've got a coworker or even a friend who often bad mouth other people,
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ใงใ™ใ‹ใ‚‰ใ€ๅŒๅƒšใ‚„ ๅ‹ไบบใงใ•ใˆใ€ไป–ไบบใฎๆ‚ชๅฃใ‚’ใ‚ˆใ่จ€ใ†ไบบใŒใ„ใฆใ€
02:48
and again you just want to ask them to stop,
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ใ‚„ใ‚ใ‚‹ใ‚ˆใ†ใซ้ ผใฟใŸใ„
02:51
here are three strategies to help you do that in a kind and polite way.
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ๅ ดๅˆใฏใ€่ฆชๅˆ‡ใงไธๅฏงใชๆ–นๆณ•ใงใใ‚Œใ‚’่กŒใ†ใŸใ‚ใฎ 3 ใคใฎๆ–นๆณ•ใ‚’ๆฌกใซ็คบใ—ใพใ™ใ€‚
02:56
Strategy number one is to change it. In other words,
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ๆˆฆ็•ฅใฎ็ฌฌ 1 ใฏใ€ใใ‚Œใ‚’ๅค‰ๆ›ดใ™ใ‚‹ใ“ใจใงใ™ใ€‚ ใคใพใ‚Šใ€
03:00
immediately change the topic.
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ใ™ใใซ่ฉฑ้กŒใ‚’ๅค‰ใˆใ‚‹ใ€‚
03:02
So if you're in a conversation with someone and they say something like,
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ใ‚‚ใ—ใ‚ใชใŸใŒ่ชฐใ‹ใจไผš่ฉฑใ—ใฆใ„ ใฆใ€ๅฝผใ‚‰
03:07
oh my gosh, did you hear what she did yesterday?
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ใŒใ€Œใชใ‚“ใฆใ“ใจใ ใ€ๆ˜จๆ—ฅๅฝผๅฅณใŒไฝ•ใ‚’ใ—ใŸใ‹่žใ„ใŸ๏ผŸใ€ใฎใ‚ˆใ†ใชใ“ใจใ‚’่จ€ใฃใŸใจใ—ใŸใ‚‰๏ผŸ
03:10
You know that the next thing coming is some kind of gossip or rumor.
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ๆฌกใซใ‚„ใฃใฆใใ‚‹ใฎ ใฏใ€ใ‚ใ‚‹็จฎใฎใ‚ดใ‚ทใƒƒใƒ—ใ‚„ๅ™‚ใงใ‚ใ‚‹ใ“ใจใ‚’็Ÿฅใฃใฆใ„ใพใ™ใ€‚
03:15
And if you don't want to hear it or you don't want to participate in it,
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ใพใŸใ€่žใใŸใใชใ„ๅ ดๅˆใ‚„ ๅ‚ๅŠ ใ—ใŸใใชใ„
03:19
you can immediately change the subject.
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ๅ ดๅˆใฏใ€ใ™ใใซ่ฉฑ้กŒใ‚’ๅค‰ใˆใ‚‹ใ“ใจใŒใงใใพใ™ใ€‚
03:22
So here are three examples of how to do that.
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ใใ“ใงใ€ใใฎๆ–นๆณ•ใฎ 3 ใคใฎไพ‹ใ‚’ๆฌกใซ ็คบใ—ใพใ™ใ€‚
03:25
When a friend starts that conversation with, oh my gosh,
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ๅ‹ไบบใŒใใฎไผš่ฉฑใ‚’ๅง‹ใ‚ใŸใจใ ใ€ใ‚ใ‚ใ€ใชใ‚“ใฆใ“ใจใ ใ€
03:29
did you hear what happened yesterday? You can simply say no.
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ๆ˜จๆ—ฅไฝ•ใŒ่ตทใ“ใฃใŸใฎใ‹่žใ„ใŸ๏ผŸ ใ‚ใชใŸใฏๅ˜ใซใƒŽใƒผใจ่จ€ใ†ใ“ใจใŒใงใใพใ™ใ€‚
03:33
But anyway,
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ใจใซใ‹ใ
03:34
have you started watching that new TV series or no,
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ใ€ใ‚ใชใŸใฏ ใใฎๆ–ฐใ—ใ„ใƒ†ใƒฌใƒ“ใ‚ทใƒชใƒผใ‚บใ‚’่ฆ‹ๅง‹ใ‚ใพใ—ใŸใ‹ใ€ใใ‚Œใจใ‚‚
03:38
I didn't anyway, are you going to the concert next week? And finally,
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็งใฏ่ฆ‹ใพใ›ใ‚“ใงใ—ใŸ ใ‹?ๆฅ้€ฑใฎใ‚ณใƒณใ‚ตใƒผใƒˆใซ่กŒใใพใ™ใ‹? ใใ—ใฆๆœ€ๅพŒใซใ€
03:43
no, I didn't. But anyway,
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ใ„ใ„ใˆใ€็งใฏใ—ใพใ›ใ‚“ใงใ—ใŸใ€‚ ใจใซใ‹ใใ€ๅ…ˆ้€ฑใฎ
03:45
tell me about how your presentation went last week and all of those examples.
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ใƒ—ใƒฌใ‚ผใƒณใƒ†ใƒผใ‚ทใƒงใƒณใฎๆง˜ๅญ ใจใ€ใใ‚Œใ‚‰ใฎไพ‹ใซใคใ„ใฆๆ•™ใˆใฆใใ ใ•ใ„ใ€‚
03:50
I'm using a really simple formula. I'm saying no,
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็งใฏ้žๅธธใซๅ˜็ด”ใชๅผใ‚’ไฝฟ็”จใ—ใฆใ„ใพใ™ใ€‚ ็งใฏใ€
03:53
that I didn't hear this important information and frankly I don't care.
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ใ“ใฎ้‡่ฆใชๆƒ…ๅ ฑใ‚’่žใ„ใฆใ„ใชใ‹ใฃใŸใ— ใ€็Ž‡็›ดใซ่จ€ใฃใฆๆฐ—ใซใ—ใชใ„ใจ่จ€ใฃใฆใ„ใพใ™.
03:59
Anyway, I want to move on to another topic.
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ใจใซใ‹ใใ€ ๅˆฅใฎ่ฉฑ้กŒใซ็งปใ‚ŠใŸใ„ใจๆ€ใ„ใพใ™ใ€‚
04:03
It's a really simple formula and it makes it easy to transition to another
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ใ“ใ‚Œใฏ้žๅธธใซๅ˜็ด”ใชๅผใงใ‚ใ‚Š ใ€ๅˆฅใฎใƒˆใƒ”ใƒƒใ‚ฏใซ็ฐกๅ˜ใซ็งป่กŒใงใ
04:07
topic. Now, if that doesn't work,
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ใพใ™ใ€‚ ใ•ใฆใ€ใใ‚ŒใŒใ†ใพใใ„ใ‹ใชใ„ๅ ดๅˆใ€ใพใŸใฏ
04:11
if you have someone who persists in saying negative things about other people,
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ไป–ใฎไบบใซใคใ„ใฆๅฆๅฎš็š„ใชใ“ใจใ‚’่จ€ใ„็ถšใ‘ใ‚‹ไบบใŒใ„ใ‚‹
04:17
then you can use strategy number two, which is simply shut it down.
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ๅ ดๅˆใฏใ€ๆˆฆ็•ฅ2ใ‚’ไฝฟ็”จใงใใพใ™ ใ€‚ใ“ใ‚Œใฏใ€ๅ˜ใซใ‚ทใƒฃใƒƒใƒˆใƒ€ใ‚ฆใƒณใ™ใ‚‹ใ“ใจใงใ™.
04:21
And there are a couple of ways that you can do that.
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ใใ—ใฆใ€ใใ‚Œใ‚’่กŒใ†ใซใฏใ„ใใคใ‹ใฎ ๆ–นๆณ•ใŒใ‚ใ‚Šใพใ™ใ€‚
04:24
The first thing you can do is simply be honest. For example,
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ใ‚ใชใŸใŒๆœ€ๅˆใซใงใใ‚‹ใ“ใจใฏใ€ ๅ˜ใซๆญฃ็›ดใงใ‚ใ‚‹ใ“ใจใงใ™ใ€‚ ใŸใจใˆใฐใ€
04:28
you could say something like,
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ใ€Œ้™ฐใง่ชฐใ‹ใฎ
04:30
I don't really feel like talking about someone behind their back,
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ใ“ใจใ‚’่ฉฑใ™ใฎใฏใ‚ใพใ‚Šๆฐ—ใŒ้€ฒใพใชใ„ใ€ใ€ใ€Œ
04:33
or I feel bad talking about someone when they're not here. And finally,
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่ชฐใ‹ใŒใ“ใ“ใซใ„ใชใ„ใจใใซ่ชฐใ‹ใซใคใ„ใฆ่ฉฑใ™ใฎใฏๆฐ—ๅˆ†ใŒๆ‚ชใ„ใ€ใชใฉใฎใ‚ˆใ†ใซ่จ€ใ†ใ“ใจใŒใงใ ใพใ™ใ€‚ ใใ—ใฆๆœ€ๅพŒใซใ€
04:38
you know, I'm not really into gossip.
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็งใฏใ‚ใพใ‚Šใ‚ดใ‚ทใƒƒใƒ—ใซใฏ่ˆˆๅ‘ณใŒใ‚ใ‚Šใพใ›ใ‚“ใ€‚
04:42
I'm not really into,
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I'm not really into,
04:44
this is a great expression to say that it's something that you're not interested
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ใ“ใ‚Œใฏใ€ ่‡ชๅˆ†ใŒ่ˆˆๅ‘ณใ‚’ๆŒใฃใฆใ„ใชใ„ใ“ใจ
04:48
in or you don't enjoy. I'm not really into, I'm not really into gossip.
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ใ€ใพใŸใฏๆฅฝใ—ใ‚“ใงใ„ใชใ„ใ“ใจใ‚’่กจใ™็ด ๆ™ดใ‚‰ใ—ใ„่กจ็พใงใ™ใ€‚ ็งใฏ ใ‚ใพใ‚Šใ‚ดใ‚ทใƒƒใƒ—ใซ่ˆˆๅ‘ณใŒใ‚ใ‚Šใพใ›ใ‚“ใ€‚
04:53
Then after you've been honest about how you feel,
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ๆฌกใซใ€่‡ชๅˆ†ใฎ ๆฐ—ๆŒใกใซๆญฃ็›ดใซใชใฃ
04:56
you can ask to simply change the topic. For example,
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ใŸใ‚‰ใ€ใƒˆใƒ”ใƒƒใ‚ฏใ‚’ๅค‰ๆ›ดใ™ใ‚‹ใ‚ˆใ†ใซ้ ผใ‚€ใ“ใจใŒใงใใพใ™ใ€‚ ใŸใจใˆใฐใ€
05:00
you might say something like, so can we talk about something else?
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ใ‚ใชใŸใฏๆฌกใฎใ‚ˆใ†ใซ ่จ€ใ†ใ‹ใ‚‚ใ—ใ‚Œใพใ›ใ‚“ใ€‚
05:04
Or do you mind if we change the subject?
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ใใ‚Œใจใ‚‚่ฉฑ้กŒใ‚’ๅค‰ใˆใฆใ‚‚ใ‚ˆใ‚ใ—ใ„ใงใ™ใ‹๏ผŸ
05:08
Once you put those two things together,
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ใ“ใฎ 2 ใคใฎใ“ใจ
05:10
being honest about how you feel and requesting the change the subject,
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ใ‚’็ต„ใฟๅˆใ‚ใ›ใ‚‹ใจใ€่‡ชๅˆ†ใฎๆฐ—ๆŒใกใซๆญฃ็›ดใซใชใ‚Š ใ€่ฉฑ้กŒใ‚’ๅค‰ใˆใ‚‹ใ‚ˆใ†ใซ่ฆๆฑ‚ใ™ใ‚‹ใจใ€ๆฌก
05:14
here's how it might sound. The next time someone says something like, oh my gosh,
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ใฎใ‚ˆใ†ใซใชใ‚Šใพใ™ใ€‚ ๆฌกๅ›žใ€ ่ชฐใ‹ใŒใ€Œใชใ‚“ใฆใ“ใฃใŸใ€
05:19
did you hear about, you could say, you know,
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่žใ„ใŸ๏ผŸ ใ€ใชใฉใจ่จ€ใฃใŸใ‚‰ใ€
05:23
I'm not really comfortable with gossip.
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ใ€Œ็งใฏใ‚ดใ‚ทใƒƒใƒ—ใฏใ‚ใพใ‚Šๅพ—ๆ„ใงใฏใชใ„ใ€ใจ่จ€ใ†ใ“ใจใŒใงใใพใ™ใ€‚
05:25
Do you mind if we talk about something else or, yeah,
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็งใŸใกใŒไฝ•ใ‹ไป–ใฎใ“ใจใซใคใ„ใฆ่ฉฑใ— ใฆใ‚‚ๆง‹ใ„ใพใ›ใ‚“ใ‹ใ€ใใ†ใงใ™ใ€
05:28
I'm not really into gossip. Let's talk about something else. As you can see,
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็งใฏใ‚ดใ‚ทใƒƒใƒ—ใซใ‚ใพใ‚Š่ˆˆๅ‘ณใŒใ‚ใ‚Šใพใ›ใ‚“. ไป–ใฎใ“ใจใซใคใ„ใฆ่ฉฑใ—ใพใ—ใ‚‡ใ†ใ€‚ ใŠใ‚ใ‹ใ‚Šใฎใ‚ˆใ†ใซ
05:33
when we put those together with the right intonation,
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ใ€ใ“ใ‚Œใ‚‰ ใ‚’ๆญฃใ—ใ„ใ‚คใƒณใƒˆใƒใƒผใ‚ทใƒงใƒณใงใพใจใ‚ใ€
05:37
when we stay friendly and polite,
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ๅ‹ๅฅฝ็š„ใ‹ใค็คผๅ„€ๆญฃใ—ใใ—ใฆใ„ใ‚Œ
05:39
it's a perfect way to immediately shut down that gossip or negative talk.
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ใฐใ€ใ†ใ‚ใ•่ฉฑใ‚„ๅฆๅฎš็š„ใช่ฉฑใ‚’ใ™ใใซใ‚ทใƒฃใƒƒใƒˆใƒ€ใ‚ฆใƒณใ™ใ‚‹ใฎใซๆœ€้ฉใชๆ–นๆณ•ใงใ™ใ€‚
05:45
Once you have those two strategies,
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ใ“ใฎ 2 ใค
05:47
the strategy of changing the topic or shutting down that situation where
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ใฎๆˆฆ็•ฅใ€่ฉฑ้กŒใ‚’ๅค‰ใˆใ‚‹ๆˆฆ็•ฅใ€ ใพใŸใฏ
05:52
everyone wants to dish the dirt,
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่ชฐใ‚‚ใŒๆฑšใ‚Œใ‚’่ฝใจใ—ใŸใŒใ‚‹็Šถๆณใ‚’ใ‚ทใƒฃใƒƒใƒˆใƒ€ใ‚ฆใƒณใ™ใ‚‹
05:54
you can start using strategy number three and this one's a little bit different.
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ๆˆฆ็•ฅใŒใงใใŸใ‚‰ใ€3 ็•ช็›ฎใฎๆˆฆ็•ฅใ‚’ไฝฟใ„ๅง‹ใ‚ใ‚‹ใ“ใจใŒใงใใพใ™ ใ€‚ใ“ใ‚Œใฏๅฐ‘ใ—็•ฐใชใ‚Šใพใ™ใ€‚
05:59
It's more longterm,
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ใใ‚Œใฏใ‚ˆใ‚Š้•ทๆœŸ็š„ใชใ‚‚ใฎใง
06:01
and the ultimate goal is to create an opportunity for change.
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ใ‚ใ‚Šใ€ๆœ€็ต‚็š„ใช็›ฎๆจ™ใฏ ๅค‰ๅŒ–ใฎๆฉŸไผšใ‚’็”Ÿใฟๅ‡บใ™ใ“ใจใงใ™ใ€‚
06:05
In other words to encourage your friend or coworker to Stop Gossiping about
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่จ€ใ„ๆ›ใˆใ‚Œใฐใ€ๅ‹ไบบ ใ‚„ๅŒๅƒšใซไป–ไบบใฎใ†ใ‚ใ•่ฉฑใ‚’ใ‚„ใ‚ใฆใ€
06:11
other people and instead focus more on speaking positively.
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ๅ‰ๅ‘ใใซ่ฉฑใ™ใ“ใจใซใ‚‚ใฃใจ้›†ไธญใ™ใ‚‹ใ‚ˆใ†ใซๅ‹งใ‚ใ‚‹ใ“ใจใงใ™.
06:16
A great way to do that is to simply talk about advice or values that you have
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ใใฎใŸใ‚ใฎๅ„ชใ‚ŒใŸๆ–นๆณ•ใฏใ€ๅ‹้”ใจไผš่ฉฑใ—ใฆ ใ„ใ‚‹ใจใใซใ€่‡ชๅˆ†ใŒๆŒใฃใฆใ„ใ‚‹ใ‚ขใƒ‰ใƒใ‚คใ‚นใ‚„ไพกๅ€ค่ฆณใซใคใ„ใฆ่ฉฑใ™ใ“ใจใงใ™
06:21
when you're having a conversation with your friend.
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ใ€‚
06:24
So the next time that you're having lunch or coffee with a friend who often
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ๆฌกใซใ€ไป–ใฎไบบใฎ ใ“ใจใ‚’ใ‚ˆใๆ‚ชใ่ฉฑใ™ๅ‹ไบบใจใƒฉใƒณใƒใ‚„ใ‚ณใƒผใƒ’ใƒผใ‚’้ฃฒใ‚€
06:29
speaks badly about other people,
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06:31
you can simply start talking about the things that are important to you and what
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ใจใใฏใ€่‡ชๅˆ† ใซใจใฃใฆ้‡่ฆใชใ“ใจ
06:36
you think about gossip and use it as an opportunity to have a discussion.
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ใ‚„ใ‚ดใ‚ทใƒƒใƒ—ใซใคใ„ใฆใฉใ†ๆ€ใ†ใ‹ใซใคใ„ใฆ่ฉฑใ—ๅง‹ใ‚ใ€ใใ‚Œใ‚’ๆฉŸไผšใจใ—ใฆๅˆฉ็”จใ™ใ‚‹ใ“ใจใŒใงใใพใ™ใ€‚ ่ฉฑใ—ๅˆใ„ใ€‚
06:41
Let me give you an example. You might say something like, you know,
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ไพ‹ใ‚’ๆŒ™ใ’ใพใ—ใ‚‡ใ†ใ€‚ ใ“ใ†่จ€ใ†ใ‹ใ‚‚ใ—ใ‚Œใพใ›ใ‚“ใญใ€
06:45
recently I read this really interesting article that had some advice about how
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ๆœ€่ฟ‘็งใฏใ“ใฎ้žๅธธใซ่ˆˆๅ‘ณๆทฑใ„่จ˜ไบ‹ใ‚’่ชญใฟใพใ—ใŸใ€‚ ใใฎ่จ˜ไบ‹ใซใฏ
06:49
to talk about people and they had this interesting idea that every time you're
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ใ€ไบบใซใคใ„ใฆ่ฉฑใ™ๆ–นๆณ•ใซใคใ„ใฆใฎใ‚ขใƒ‰ใƒใ‚คใ‚นใŒใ‚ใ‚Šใพใ—ใŸใ€‚ๅฝผใ‚‰ใฏใ€
06:55
going to say something about someone,
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่ชฐใ‹ใซใคใ„ใฆไฝ•ใ‹ใ‚’่จ€ใŠใ†ใจใ™ใ‚‹ใจใใฏใ„ใคใงใ‚‚ใ€
06:57
you should ask yourself three questions first. Like,
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่‡ชๅˆ†่‡ช่บซใซ 3 ใคใฎใ“ใจใ‚’ๅฐ‹ใญใ‚‹ในใใ ใจใ„ใ†่ˆˆๅ‘ณๆทฑใ„่€ƒใˆใ‚’ๆŒใฃใฆใ„ใพใ—ใŸใ€‚ ๆœ€ๅˆใซ่ณชๅ•ใ—ใพใ™ใ€‚
07:01
is this something that is kind about someone else?
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ใชใ‚“ใ‹ใ€ใ“ใ‚Œ ใฃใฆ่ชฐใ‹ใซๅ„ชใ—ใ„ใฃใฆใ“ใจ๏ผŸ
07:04
Is it necessary for me to say and is it helpful?
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็ง ใŒ่จ€ใ†ๅฟ…่ฆใŒใ‚ใ‚Šใพใ™ใ‹ใ€ใใ‚Œใฏๅฝนใซ็ซ‹ใกใพใ™ใ‹?
07:08
And I thought that was really interesting and a great way to avoid talking badly
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ใใ—ใฆใ€ใใ‚Œใฏๆœฌๅฝ“ใซ่ˆˆๅ‘ณๆทฑใ„ใ“ใจใง ใ‚ใ‚Šใ€ไป–ใฎไบบใฎๆ‚ชๅฃใ‚’่จ€ใ†ใฎใ‚’้ฟใ‘ใ‚‹ใŸใ‚ใฎ็ด ๆ™ดใ‚‰ใ—ใ„ๆ–นๆณ•ใ ใจๆ€ใ„ใพใ—ใŸ
07:13
about other people. I don't know. What do you think?
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. ็Ÿฅใ‚‰ใชใ„ ใ€‚ ใฉใ†ๆ€ใ„ใพใ™ใ‹๏ผŸ
07:16
Now that was just an example,
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ใ“ใ‚Œใฏใปใ‚“ใฎไธ€ไพ‹ใงใ™ใŒใ€
07:18
but you could use something similar if you read something online or hear some
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ใ‚ชใƒณใƒฉใ‚คใƒณใงไฝ•ใ‹ใ‚’่ชญใ‚“ใ ใ‚Š
07:24
great advice on a podcast or a Confident English lesson...
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ใ€ใƒใƒƒใƒ‰ใ‚ญใƒฃใ‚นใƒˆ ใ‚„ Confident English ใฎใƒฌใƒƒใ‚นใƒณใง็ด ๆ™ดใ‚‰ใ—ใ„ใ‚ขใƒ‰ใƒใ‚คใ‚นใ‚’่žใ„ใŸใ‚Šใ™ใ‚‹ๅ ดๅˆใฏใ€ๅŒๆง˜ใฎใ“ใจใ‚’ไฝฟ็”จใงใใพใ™...
07:28
Simply talk about it with your friend and use it as an opportunity to discuss
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ๅ˜ใซใใ‚Œใซใคใ„ใฆๅ‹้”ใจ่ฉฑใ—ใ€ใใ‚Œ ใซใคใ„ใฆ่ฉฑใ—ๅˆใ†ๆฉŸไผšใจใ—ใฆไฝฟ็”จใ—ใฆใใ ใ•ใ„ใ€‚
07:33
the role of gossip and how terrible it can be for other people and the fact that
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ใ‚ดใ‚ทใƒƒใƒ—ใฎๅฝนๅ‰ฒใจใ€ใใ‚ŒใŒไป–ใฎไบบใซใจใฃใฆใฉใ‚Œใปใฉใฒใฉใ„ใ‚‚ใฎใงใ‚ใ‚‹ใ‹ ใ€ใใ—ใฆ
07:39
you're not really into it.
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ใ‚ใชใŸใŒใ‚ใพใ‚Šๅฅฝใใงใฏใชใ„ใจใ„ใ†ไบ‹ๅฎŸ.
07:41
It's a great way to get someone else to think about the things that they say and
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็›ธๆ‰‹ใฎ็™บ่จ€ใ‚„ใใฎ็ตๆžœใซใคใ„ใฆ่€ƒใˆใฆใ‚‚ใ‚‰ใ†ใฎใซๆœ€้ฉใชๆ–นๆณ•ใงใ™ใ€‚ใพใŸ
07:46
the consequences they might have or it's simply might be an opportunity for you
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07:52
to have an honest discussion with your friend and to be clear that you're not
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ใ€ๅ‹ไบบใจ็Ž‡็›ดใซ่ฉฑใ—ๅˆใฃใฆใ€่‡ชๅˆ†ใŒใ‚ดใ‚ทใƒƒใƒ— ๅฅฝใใงใฏใชใ„ใ“ใจใ‚’ๆ˜Ž็ขบใซใ™ใ‚‹ๆฉŸไผšใซใชใ‚‹ใ‹ใ‚‚ใ—ใ‚Œใพใ›ใ‚“ใ€‚
07:57
into gossip, you don't enjoy it and you don't want to participate in it. Now,
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ใ€ใ‚ใชใŸใฏใใ‚Œใ‚’ๆฅฝใ—ใ‚“ใง ใŠใ‚‰ใšใ€ๅ‚ๅŠ ใ—ใŸใใ‚ใ‚Šใพใ›ใ‚“ใ€‚ ใ•ใฆ
08:02
as always,
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08:02
I've got a challenge question for you so you have the opportunity to practice
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ใ€ใ„ใคใ‚‚ใฎใ‚ˆใ†ใซใ€ไปŠๆ—ฅใŠ่ฉฑใ—ใ—ใŸใ“ใฎ่จ€่ชžใฎใ„ใใคใ‹ใ‚’็ทด็ฟ’ใ™ใ‚‹ๆฉŸไผš
ใŒๅพ—ใ‚‰ใ‚Œใ‚‹ใ‚ˆใ†ใซใ€ใƒใƒฃใƒฌใƒณใ‚ธ่ณชๅ•ใŒใ‚ใ‚Šใพใ™
08:06
some of this language that we've talked about today. But before we do that,
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. ใ—ใ‹ใ—ใ€ใใฎๅ‰ใซใ€
08:11
if you found this lesson useful to you, I would love to know,
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ใ“ใฎใƒฌใƒƒใ‚นใƒณใŒๅฝนใซ็ซ‹ใฃใŸ ใจๆ€ใ‚ใ‚Œใ‚‹ๅ ดๅˆใฏใ€ใœใฒใŠ็Ÿฅใ‚‰ใ›ใใ ใ•ใ„
08:14
and there are three simple ways that you can tell me. Number one,
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ใ€‚3 ใคใฎ็ฐกๅ˜ใชๆ–นๆณ• ใ‚’ๆ•™ใˆใฆใใ ใ•ใ„ใ€‚ ใพใš
08:18
give this video a thumbs up on Youtube and subscribe to this channel so you
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ใ€YouTube ใงใ“ใฎใƒ“ใƒ‡ใ‚ชใ‚’ ้ซ˜ใ่ฉ•ไพกใ—ใ€ใ“ใฎใƒใƒฃใƒณใƒใƒซใซ็™ป้Œฒใ—ใฆ
08:22
never miss a lesson. Number two, share it with friends and coworkers on Facebook.
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ใ€ใƒฌใƒƒใ‚นใƒณใ‚’่ฆ‹้€ƒใ•ใชใ„ใ‚ˆใ†ใซใ—ใฆใใ ใ•ใ„ใ€‚ 2 ใค็›ฎใฏใ€ Facebook ใงๅ‹ไบบใ‚„ๅŒๅƒšใจๅ…ฑๆœ‰ใ™ใ‚‹ใ“ใจใงใ™ใ€‚
08:28
And finally, if you have a friend who could use some good advice,
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ๆœ€ๅพŒใซใ€่‰ฏใ„ใ‚ขใƒ‰ใƒใ‚คใ‚นใ‚’ใใ‚Œใ‚‹ๅ‹ไบบใŒใ„ใ‚‹ๅ ดๅˆใฏใ€
08:32
share this lesson with them by email. So now let's get to the challenge question.
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ใ“ใฎใƒฌใƒƒใ‚นใƒณใ‚’ใƒกใƒผใƒซใงๅ…ฑๆœ‰ใ—ใฆใใ ใ•ใ„ใ€‚ ใใ‚Œใงใฏใ€ใƒใƒฃใƒฌใƒณใ‚ธ่ณชๅ•ใซ็งปใ‚Šใพใ—ใ‚‡ใ†ใ€‚ ๅŒๅƒšใฎ
08:37
Imagine that you're having lunch with one of your coworkers and it's someone you
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1 ไบบใจๆ˜ผ้ฃŸใ‚’ใจใฃใฆใ„ใฆใ€ใใฎไบบใŒๆœฌๅฝ“ใซๅฅฝใใชไบบใ ใจๆƒณๅƒใ—ใฆใฟใฆใใ ใ•ใ„
08:41
really like. You spend a lot of time together,
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ใ€‚ ใ‚ใชใŸใฏๅคšใใฎๆ™‚้–“ใ‚’ไธ€็ท’ใซ้Žใ”ใ—ใ€้€ฑๆœซใซ
08:44
you even hang out on the weekends sometimes,
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ใŸใ‚€ใ‚ใ™ใ‚‹ใ“ใจใ‚‚ใ‚ใ‚Šใพใ™
08:47
but this coworker often speaks badly about other people in the office and you
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ใŒใ€ใ“ใฎๅŒๅƒš ใฏใ‚ชใƒ•ใ‚ฃใ‚นใงไป–ใฎไบบใฎใ“ใจใ‚’ใ‚ˆใๆ‚ชใ่จ€ใ„ใ€ใ‚ใชใŸ
08:53
like some of those other people,
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ใฏใใฎใ‚ˆใ†ใชไป–ใฎไบบใŸใกใฎไฝ•ไบบใ‹ใŒๅฅฝใใช
08:55
so it makes you feel uncomfortable and you really wish she wouldn't do that.
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ใฎใงใ€ไธๅฟซใซๆ„Ÿใ˜ใ€ ๅฝผๅฅณใŒใใ†ใงใ‚ใฃใฆใปใ—ใ„ใจๅฟƒใ‹ใ‚‰้ก˜ใฃใฆใ„ใพใ™. ใใ‚Œใ‚’ใ—ใชใ„ใงใใ ใ•ใ„ใ€‚
09:01
What strategy would you use from this lesson to ask her to stop or to change the
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ๅฝผๅฅณใซ่ฉฑใ‚’ใ‚„ใ‚ใŸใ‚Šใ€่ฉฑ้กŒใ‚’ๅค‰ใˆใŸใ‚Šใ™ใ‚‹ใ‚ˆใ†ใซ้ ผใ‚€ใซใฏใ€ใ“ใฎใƒฌใƒƒใ‚นใƒณใ‹ใ‚‰ใฉใฎใ‚ˆใ†ใชๆˆฆ็•ฅใ‚’ไฝฟ็”จใ—
09:06
topic? The best way for you to share with me,
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ใพใ™ใ‹? ็งใจๅ…ฑๆœ‰ใ—ใ€
09:09
get feedback and learn from others in the Confident English community is to
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ใƒ•ใ‚ฃใƒผใƒ‰ใƒใƒƒใ‚ฏใ‚’ๅพ—ใฆ ใ€Confident English ใ‚ณใƒŸใƒฅใƒ‹ใƒ†ใ‚ฃใฎไป–ใฎใƒฆใƒผใ‚ถใƒผใ‹ใ‚‰ๅญฆใถใŸใ‚ใฎๆœ€่‰ฏใฎๆ–นๆณ•ใฏใ€
09:13
share your comments just below this lesson in the comment section. With that,
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ใ“ใฎ ใƒฌใƒƒใ‚นใƒณใฎใ™ใไธ‹ใฎใ‚ณใƒกใƒณใƒˆ ใ‚ปใ‚ฏใ‚ทใƒงใƒณใงใ‚ณใƒกใƒณใƒˆใ‚’ๅ…ฑๆœ‰ใ™ใ‚‹ใ“ใจใงใ™ใ€‚ ใใ‚Œใงใฏใ€
09:18
thank you so much for joining me and I look forward to seeing you next time for
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ใ”ๅ‚ๅŠ ใ„ใŸใ ใใ‚ใ‚ŠใŒใจใ†ใ”ใ–ใ„ใพใ™ใ€‚ๆฌกๅ›žใ€่‡ชไฟกใฎใ‚ใ‚‹่‹ฑ่ชžใฎใƒฌใƒƒใ‚นใƒณใงใŠไผšใ„ใงใใ‚‹ใ“ใจ ใ‚’ๆฅฝใ—ใฟใซใ—ใฆใ„ใพใ™
09:21
your Confident English lesson.
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ใ€‚
ใ“ใฎใ‚ฆใ‚งใƒ–ใ‚ตใ‚คใƒˆใซใคใ„ใฆ

ใ“ใฎใ‚ตใ‚คใƒˆใงใฏ่‹ฑ่ชžๅญฆ็ฟ’ใซๅฝน็ซ‹ใคYouTubeๅ‹•็”ปใ‚’็ดนไป‹ใ—ใพใ™ใ€‚ไธ–็•Œไธญใฎไธ€ๆต่ฌ›ๅธซใซใ‚ˆใ‚‹่‹ฑ่ชžใƒฌใƒƒใ‚นใƒณใ‚’่ฆ‹ใ‚‹ใ“ใจใŒใงใใพใ™ใ€‚ๅ„ใƒ“ใƒ‡ใ‚ชใฎใƒšใƒผใ‚ธใซ่กจ็คบใ•ใ‚Œใ‚‹่‹ฑ่ชžๅญ—ๅน•ใ‚’ใƒ€ใƒ–ใƒซใ‚ฏใƒชใƒƒใ‚ฏใ™ใ‚‹ใจใ€ใใ“ใ‹ใ‚‰ใƒ“ใƒ‡ใ‚ชใ‚’ๅ†็”Ÿใ™ใ‚‹ใ“ใจใŒใงใใพใ™ใ€‚ๅญ—ๅน•ใฏใƒ“ใƒ‡ใ‚ชใฎๅ†็”ŸใจๅŒๆœŸใ—ใฆใ‚นใ‚ฏใƒญใƒผใƒซใ—ใพใ™ใ€‚ใ”ๆ„่ฆ‹ใƒปใ”่ฆๆœ›ใŒใ”ใ–ใ„ใพใ—ใŸใ‚‰ใ€ใ“ใกใ‚‰ใฎใŠๅ•ใ„ๅˆใ‚ใ›ใƒ•ใ‚ฉใƒผใƒ ใ‚ˆใ‚Šใ”้€ฃ็ตกใใ ใ•ใ„ใ€‚

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