3 Lessons on Hope in Challenging Times | Wajahat Ali | TED

翻译人员: C Cheng 校对人员: Yip Yan Yeung

The last time I addressed this august TED crowd was in 2019

瓦贾哈特·阿里：我上次为尊敬的 TED 听众发表演讲是在 2019 年，

from the main stage in Vancouver,

地点是 TED 位于温哥华的主讲台。

where I was giving my first TED Talk on the case for having children.

我在那里就养育孩子问题 发表了第一次演讲。

And that's where I shared the news I had just received earlier in the week

同样是在那里，我宣布了 一条我在那周稍早时收到的消息。

that my then two-year-old daughter, Nusayba,

我两岁的女儿努莎芭

was diagnosed with stage IV cancer and needed a full liver transplant.

被确诊患有癌症晚期， 需要进行全肝移植。

So how have your past three years been?

在过去的 3 年里， 你过得怎样？

As you can imagine,

你们可以想象，

our last three years have been eventful.

过去的 3 年是多事之秋。

However, they have given me some tough,

然而，我在这 3 年里，

learned, lived experiences and lessons

学到、体验到了 一些严肃的经验教训，

about this ephemeral thing we call hope.

对“希望”这种稍纵即逝的东西 有了重新认识。

And apparently, there is a huge demand for hope right now.

现如今，人们似乎 对希望有着巨大需求。

In 2022,

2022 年，

we're all dealing with multiple crises.

我们都在应付多重危机。

A pandemic has killed 900,000 Americans,

疫情已经夺去了 90 万美国人的生命，

there's a partial lockdown, there's disinformation,

人们还在经历局部封锁、虚假新闻、

there's income inequality,

收入不均，

the rise of white supremacy, people telling people like me,

白人至上的思潮开始涌动， 像我这样的人常会听到有人说：

“Go back to where you came from.”

“哪儿来的，回哪儿去。”

We have to learn new Greek letters every few months,

我们每隔几个月， 就要学一些新的希腊字母，

and oh, yeah, there's climate change.

哦，对了，还有气候变化。

But other than that, things are pretty peachy.

但是，除此之外，事情还算顺利。

And with all of that, you might be asking,

面对上述种种状况，你也许会问，

“Well, then, why should we be hopeful in such hopeless times, Wajahat?”

“好吧，瓦贾哈，在如此绝望的 年代里，我们为何还要抱有希望呢？”

And that is a very valid question.

这是个合情合理的问题。

And it's a perfectly fair question.

But hope is what allowed me to believe that my daughter would somehow survive.

希望曾让我坚信女儿会活下来。

And she did.

她的确活了下来。

And so if I may, allow me to share briefly

如果可以的话，我希望能与你们分享

three pieces of advice or lessons

三条建议，或者说是三个教训，

or things that we can do

三件我们在绝望时可以做的事，

that gave me hope in hopeless times

这些事让我在绝望中重获希望。

and that I hope can help you.

我希望这也能对你们有所帮助。

Number one.

首先，

Tie your camel first.

“先拴住自己的骆驼”。

There's a great saying in Islam,

有一句很出名的伊斯兰谚语，

many Muslims know this,

许多穆斯林都知道，

that, have faith in God, but tie your camel first.

相信上帝， 不过先负起自己的职责。

As a dad,

作为一位父亲，

I felt utterly hopeless with Nusayba's cancer.

努莎芭的癌症曾让我彻底绝望。

I'm the dad, I'm supposed to fix things.

我是父亲，我应该解决问题。

But I couldn't fix cancer.

但是，我治不了癌症。

Cancer plays for all the marbles.

癌症试图战胜一切。

It's a relentless, brutal, remorseless killing machine.

它是一台残酷无情、 永不停转的杀人机器。

It does not care about your vacation plans.

癌症不会在乎你的假期安排，

It does not care about your bucket list.

不会在乎你的愿望清单，

It does not care about your Netflix queue.

不会在乎你在 Netflix 上想看的电影。

It comes for everything.

癌症横扫一切。

Then, coronavirus.

之后，又出现了新冠病毒。

Awesome.

“太棒了”。

How do I defeat coronavirus?

我该怎么战败新冠病毒呢？

A 41-year-old, middle-aged, slightly overweight male with flat foot.

我不过是一个 41 岁、 微胖、平足的中年男人。

It's easy to feel helpless,

无助感、失控感、

out of control, adrift.

与世沉浮之感，油然而生。

But at the end of the day,

但是，最终，

try letting go of what you can't control

你要试着放下那些 自己控制不了的事，

and just focus on what you can control.

只专注于自己可以控制的事情。

The simple stuff.

比如那些简单易行的事。

Wear a mask.

戴口罩。

Get vaccinated.

打疫苗。

Take care of your daily chores.

料理日常杂务。

Something that makes you feel that you have some control,

做一些让你觉得自己可以掌控，

some agency in this world.

可以在这个世界里 有些许影响的事情。

When it came to Nusayba,

提到努莎芭，

that meant as a dad, just to be present, you know,

这就意味着，作为一个父亲， 我要陪伴在她身边：

building her her Lego Friends set when she asked me to build it.

如果她要我给她搭 乐高好友系列，我就给她搭，

Watching "Frozen" 39 times,

和她一起看 39 遍《冰雪奇缘》，

then followed by "Zootopia" 46 times,

49 遍《疯狂动物城》，

then followed by "Moana" 56 times.

56 遍《海洋奇缘》。

Getting her the tasty frozen yogurt from the hospital vending machine

从医院的自动售货机里， 给她买她喜欢的

that she loved.

美味冰冻酸奶。

Do what you can the best you can.

全力以赴，尽力而为。

Have hope, but tie your camel first.

心怀希望，但首先要 承担起自己的责任。

And then be like Elsa from "Frozen"

然后，就像 《冰雪奇缘》里的艾莎那样，

and let the rest go.

放下其余的一切。

Number two:

第二条建议是：

invest in joy.

投资快乐。

Make the intention to actively invest in this thing called joy every day.

每天都要主动积极地做 一些令人愉快的事。

Almost like a workout.

就像是锻炼身体，

You have to commit to it.

你必须坚持投入下去。

It has to be a discipline.

这就是一项训练，

Build and flex that muscle.

锻炼强健你身上的肌肉。

The world does not need more masochists or martyrs.

这个世界不需要更多的 自虐狂或者殉道者，

It does not need more overworked, overstressed burnouts.

不需要有更多人因为过度劳累、 过度压力而筋疲力尽。

New rule for 2022.

2022 年的新规则是：

You deserve to have moments of joy, even if they are fleeting,

只要还活着， 每天都该享有片刻的快乐时光，

every day that you are alive.

哪怕这些时光仅仅是转瞬即逝。

And you have to take those moments,

你必须好好把握这些时刻，

you have to grab them, you have to seize them.

你必须抓住它，攥紧它。

I love food,

我喜爱美食，

so I learned how to cook Pakistani food,

于是就学会了做巴基斯坦菜。

took my mom's recipes during lockdown.

封城期间，我就按母亲的食谱做菜。

My kids love Lego, so that means now I love Lego.

我的孩子喜欢玩乐高积木， 所以我现在也爱玩乐高。

I love drinking chai.

我爱喝茶。

I make a cup of chai every day, it makes me happy.

所以我每天都会沏杯茶， 这让我感到很幸福。

No matter how much stress or pain or misery I was going through,

不论承受多大的压力， 有多少痛苦和忧伤，

I made sure to invest time every day,

我确保每天都要把一些时间花在

to invest in things and people

那些令自己幸福快乐的人和事上，

and experiences that gave me joy.

And finally, number three.

最后，第三点。

I would recommend, humbly, invest in the narrative of hope

我有一个很谦卑的建议： 相信充满希望的设想，

because the alternative is apathy and cynicism.

否则你会变得冷漠，且玩世不恭。

Investing in hope is painful.

投入希望是一件痛苦的事，

It means opening yourself up to the possibility of pain,

因为这意味着你可能要面对痛苦、

betrayal and disappointment.

背叛、失望等种种后果。

It's easier to court cynicism, right?

寻求一种玩世不恭的态度 不是更容易吗？

You expect nothing, so you lose nothing.

你没有任何期待， 也就不会有任何失落。

But it also means you have resigned yourself to the cheap seats.

但是，这也意味着 你安于坐在廉价的席位上，

You are a spectator who yells out "Boo,"

充当一位只会喝倒彩的观众，

instead of being a participant in the ring where your nose could get bloody,

而不是竞技场上的参赛选手。 在竞技场上，你也许会头破血流，

but at least you're pushing the ball forward.

但至少可以推动赛事。

It means choosing apathy and nihilism, which is comforting and easy,

这还意味着， 选择冷漠虚无的处世态度，

虽然让人感到欣慰安逸， 但也具有惰性和破坏力。

but also lazy and destructive.

During Nusayba's cancer,

在努莎芭身患癌症期间，

I used to sit up every night after my family went to sleep

我每晚都会在家人入睡之后坐起来，

and I stayed up till, like, three or four am, I couldn't sleep.

直到凌晨三四点，都无法入睡。

And instead I imagined,

我会像《复仇者联盟：终局之战》里的

like Doctor Strange in "Avengers: Endgame,"

奇异博士那样，

with the time stone,

有一块时间之石，

every possible scenario and outcome, just to prepare myself as a father.

把各种可能的情景和结果都想一遍， 做好一位父亲所应有的准备。

I had to emotionally prepare for every outcome.

我必须在情感上准备好 以应付一切结果。

So I used to imagine Nusayba dying.

我曾想象过努莎芭的死亡。

I imagined burying her with my own hands.

想象过自己亲手埋葬她。

I imagined making the phone call to her grandparents,

想象给她的祖父母打电话，

explaining that she had died, listening to them cry.

向他们解释努莎芭已经不在了， 然后听他们哭泣。

I imagined living the rest of my life like a shell of a man,

我想象过自己将像一副躯壳 一样度过余生，

but pretending to put a smile on my face

但是还要强颜欢笑，

because I had a son to raise and now a daughter.

因为我还有一个儿子要抚养， 如今又多了一个女儿。

My wife, badass that she is,

我的妻子，是个值得敬佩的人，

was also pregnant during Nusayba's cancer.

她在努莎芭生病期间又怀孕了。

I had to be prepared.

我必须准备就绪。

But I also chose to invest in a narrative in which Nusayba lived.

但是我也努力设想 努莎芭活下来的情景。

And I imagined seeing her alive

在想象中，我见到她活着，

with a liver transplant, smiling,

做了肝脏移植手术，而且在微笑，

regaining her hair, full of joy and life.

头发又长了出来， 欢欣喜悦、活力满满，

I preferred that story.

我更喜欢这样的故事。

That's the story I invested in,

这是我要努力投入的故事，

even as we were sitting on the edge of what seemed like a falling cliff,

即便是坐在摇摇欲坠的悬崖边时，

I decided I would put out the lawn chair and at least enjoy the scenery.

我也要搬出一把户外折叠椅， 至少可以享受一下眼前的风景。

Over 500 people, mostly strangers,

有 500 多人报名， 为努莎芭捐献肝脏，

chose to sign up to be donors for Nusayba,

其中大部分是陌生人。

even people who told me they hated me for my politics.

甚至有人对我说过， 他们痛恨我的政治见解，

They were moved by her story.

但是努莎芭的故事让他们感动。

Sometimes some people can change.

有时，有些人会改变。

Sometimes some people can choose to do and be good.

有时，有些人会选择做正确的事。

An anonymous donor, Shawn Zahir,

有一位名为肖恩·查希尔 （Shawn Zahir）的匿名捐献者，

decided to give a piece of his liver to a girl he never met

决定把自己的一块肝脏 捐给一位她从未见过的女孩儿，

just so she could live.

就为了能让她活下去。

I'm not Pollyanna.

我不是波丽安娜。

I'm not a foolish, wide-eyed, naive optimist.

我不是那种傻乎乎，睁着大眼睛， 天真无知的乐观主义者。

I'm a pragmatist,

我是一个实用主义者，

fully aware of the many challenges and horrors we are facing.

完全清楚我们现正所面临的 多种挑战和恐慌。

But through my own personal experience, if it is at all helpful,

但是，如果对你们能有所帮助的话， 我可以用我的个人经历

I can assure you that walking through this forest of horrors,

向你保证， 在你穿越这片恐怖的丛林时，

going on this journey, wherever it may lead,

在你踏上这段 不知通向何方的旅途时，

if you choose to invest in hope,

如果你选择了希望，

it at least makes the ride a bit sweeter and easier.

那么这段行程至少会 多些甜蜜，少些艰难。

And as the wise ram tells Po in “Kung Fu Panda 2,”

正如《功夫熊猫 2》里， 那只智慧的公羊对阿宝所言：

"Your story may not have such a happy beginning,

“你的故事也许没有 皆大欢喜的开始，

but that does not make you who you are.

但是这并不能决定你是谁。

It is the rest of it,

你是谁要由剩下的部分来决定， 要由你自己来选择。”

who you choose to be."

Right now,

此时此刻，

survival is victory in this story that we are living.

在我们经历的这段故事中， 活着就是胜利。

We are alive during a pandemic.

我们在疫情大流行期间仍然活着，

We are winning.

我们正在走向胜利。

And just for that, we should be grateful.

我们应该为此表示感激。

And I hope the choices we make in these challenging times will,

我希望，我们在这个 困难时期所做的选择

Inshallah, God willing,

如上帝所愿，

lead to a better story for all of us.

能为所有人带来更美好的故事。

And I believe that begins with choosing to invest in hope

我相信，在绝望中选择希望 是这个故事的开始，

during hopeless times.

Whitney Pennigton Rogers: Thanks so much for that.

惠特尼·彭尼顿·罗杰斯：非常感谢。

It was really wonderful to hear,

能听到你的发言真是太棒了，

and I think we may even hear Nusayba in the background,

我想我们可能在背景声音中 听到了努莎芭的声音。

which is, I think, exciting.

听起来很激动了。

WA: I'm sorry, that's her, it's virtual school,

瓦·阿：不好意思，那是她的声音， 她在上线上课。

I'm doing the best I can.

我尽力而为。

The wildlings are right there.

孩子在那边撒野，

What's keeping us from the wildlings is a very thin wall, so let's pray.

与我们只隔了一堵很薄的墙壁。 所以，一起祈祷吧。

WPR: I think we talked about this before we started,

惠·彭·罗：开始之前我们谈到过，

that we're all at home right now.

我们现在都待在家里。

That's the thing I think we all know.

我想，我们大家都清楚这回事。

So that's what it is.

这是实际情况。

I think before we dive into just talking more about what you've suggested

在进一步讨论你对增强希望

around growing hope,

所提出的这些建议之前，

I'd love to start by talking a little bit about your book

我想先谈一谈你的书,

"Go Back to Where You Came From,"

《哪儿来，哪儿去》，

because I think that it will provide a nice foundation

因为我认为，这本书为 我们提供了一个很好的基础，

for, sort of, understanding your thinking around this

有助于理解你的想法，

and sort of how you've come to really embrace this.

以及如何践行这些想法。

So I guess maybe you could start first by talking about the title of the book.

你也许可以先谈谈这本书的书名。

You know, it's part memoir, part historical analysis,

这既是一本回忆录， 又是一部历史分析，

part how-to guide on being inclusive and creating a place of belonging.

它还指导人们如何 培养包容性，创造归属感。

How did you come up with the title?

这个题目是怎么想出来的？

Why did you choose this for the title of your book?

你为什么选择这个题目？

WA: So the title is “Go Back to Where You Came From:

瓦·阿：书名是：《哪儿来，哪儿去：

And Other Helpful Recommendations on How to Become American.”

就如何成为美国人的几点有用建议》

这是刻意营造的一种诙谐， 即讨人嫌，又很有趣，不是吗？

Very deliberate tongue in cheek, both ugly and funny, right?

Because I believe that's the lived experience of life.

我认为这是生活的真实感受，

But that's the lived experience of many Americans

是许许多多美国人的真实经历，

who are still trying to love a country that doesn't love us back.

我们努力去爱这个国家， 但是它并不爱我们。

And so how do you respond to that pain?

那么，你该如何应对这种痛楚呢？

And some people cry, as you can tell, I laugh.

如你所知，有些人痛哭流涕， 但是，我要大笑。

And so this book is also an elegy

所以，这本书也是一首挽歌，

for the rest of us

写给我们当中

who are still striving to be co-protagonists

那些仍在努力成为

of this American narrative.

美国故事中主要角色的人。

And the book tries to expand and stretch this country

本书试图对美国加以扩展、延申，

to accommodate all of us

使其能够接纳我们所有人，

to become the multiracial democracy it has to become.

成为一个多种族、民主制国家。

Or else I believe it'll all fail.

否则，我认为，美国将会衰落。

And it's done with a lot of humor and hope,

书里充满了幽默和希望，

and throughout the journey, you read the book,

在这个过程中，你读过这本书，

you know, I talk about Nusayba's cancer,

你知道，我说的是 努莎芭患癌症期间，

but there's lots of interesting things that happen to me.

我身边也发生了很多有趣的事。

WPR: To put it mildly.

惠·彭·罗：委婉而言。

WA: Yeah, my life is like a telenovela,

瓦·阿：我的生活 就像是一部电视剧，

like a Mexican soap opera for better and for worse.

不论好坏， 就像是一部墨西哥肥皂剧。

And so I hope that when you get to the end part,

所以，在书的结尾，

where I talk about "invest in hope, but tie your camel first,"

我谈到“怀抱希望， 但先要承担起自己的责任”，

the hope that I give the audience for the future,

我给读者以希望，

I don't want it to make it a hallmarky,

但是，我没有想让它有个惊天动地，

fake, saccharine, Hollywood ending.

过于虚假甜腻， 好莱坞式的结尾。

I want you to really, like, I want it to be earned.

我希望，这是你努力争取来的希望。

And you know, the way to earn it is to confront the horrors,

争得希望的方法就是直面恐惧，

confront the challenges, name it, own it.

直面种种挑战， 把它说出来，然后战胜它。

Talk about the pain, wear the mileage and the scars.

谈一谈你的痛苦， 展示一下你的经历和伤痕。

But despite all of that, you still persist, right?

尽管如此， 你仍旧坚持不懈，不是吗？

And because I agree, I mean,

我完全赞同

what I said in the speech, the five-minute talk that I just gave you,

我在刚才 5 分钟的 谈话中所说的内容。

I believe in it.

我对其坚信不疑。

I've been on all the sides in moments of deep despair.

我在极度绝望的时刻， 有过方方面面的体验。

I've been there, of darkness of pain,

我经历过痛苦所带来的黑暗，

and I realize if you tap out, it's over.

我意识到，如果你认输了， 一切就都结束了，

If you tap out, it's done.

你一旦认输，你就全完了。

And what I've seen,

我眼中的是，

and we'll probably talk about it because you read the book,

你读过这本书， 我们也许可以谈论一下，

in those moments in my life where you feel like it's over, it's done,

当我处在人生的至暗时刻时， 我感到一切都结束了，一切都完了，

I'm at the edge of the cliff and I'm about to fall,

我在悬崖边，摇摇欲坠，

there's been a plot twist.

这时情节发生了转变。

Like, the the page turns,

就像翻过一页书，

and with it comes, like, a better story.

随之而来的，是一个更好的故事。

And so in the book I mention there was a time

我在书里提到过，有段时间

where I was completely broke, homeless,

我彻底破产，无家可归，

my parents were in jail, I was taking care of my grandparents.

父母进了监狱， 祖父母要由我来照顾。

And I’m like, there’s no way, I couldn’t even imagine my future.

我感到无计可施， 甚至无法想象自己的未来。

I couldn't imagine living to the age of 40.

我无法想象自己能活到 40 岁。

I thought I would be dead by 35.

我当时认为自己活不过 35 岁。

I’m being honest with anyone who’s listening.

不论是谁在听，我都会实话实说。

My timeline, you know, I imagine a lot, like I said, like Doctor Strange,

我有很多幻想，就像奇异博士那样，

it ended at 35, I just couldn't imagine it.

我的时间轴曾截至在 35 岁， 这令人难以想象。

And I just knew that I would die.

我就是觉得自己会在那时死去。

It’d be over, and I almost did die.

35 岁已经过去了， 我也确实差一点就死了。

But here I am, sitting in my home,

但是我还活着，就坐在我家里，

married to a woman who's way better than me,

娶了一位比我强很多的女人，

I married way up.

我是高攀了。

Like, hotter than me, smarter than me,

她比我精神，比我聪明，

like, it’s ridiculous, not even cool.

太夸张了，一点儿都不爽。

And then I got three kids and then Nusayba, who was supposed to die,

之后，我有了三个孩子， 努莎芭生了病，本来不会活太久，

that’s what they told me, she wouldn’t make it.

他们都说努莎芭活不下来。

They said every complication against this girl is happening,

所有的并发症 都在这个孩子身上出现了，

you could just hear her chirping right now,

而此时此刻你可以听到 她在叽叽喳喳地说话，

I'm sure you guys can hear her chirping, that's Nusayba.

你们肯定都听到了， 叽叽喳喳的，那就是努莎芭。

So you never know, you never know.

所以，一切皆有可能。

WPR: We have a question that came in from Darcy,

惠·彭·罗：达西有一个问题，

where Darcy asked, "The idea of investing in hope is a great one.

达西问：“投资希望是个好主意，

But how can we make it tangible?

但是我们该如何实现它呢？

You mentioned visualization or avoiding complaining,

你提到了视觉化，避免埋怨等等，

but how else can we actually bring this to life?"

此外，我们还能做些什么呢？”

WA: It's a very good question,

瓦·阿：这个问题提得非常好，

and that's where I say, tie your camel first.

我说过，首先承担起自己的责任。

You have to exhaust yourself of every possibility within your control.

你必须在自己的可控范围内， 穷尽各种可能性。

You know, and after that, you have to let go.

之后，你要顺其自然。

I'll give you an example, I mention it in the book.

我可以给你举一个 书里提到过的例子，

There was a moment, my parents were in jail.

我父母入狱的时候，

I'm 21 years old, I have to leave school.

我 21 岁，不得不离开学校。

I'm taking care of my grandparents,

我要照顾我的祖母和外祖母，

my grandmothers, who used to live with me.

她们曾和我住在一起。

I'm an only child.

我是家里唯一的孩子。

I have to care of the family business,

我必须料理家里的生意，

I have to pay the lawyer.

支付律师费。

It's post-9/11, my community turns vicious and cruel.

那是“后 9/11”时期， 当地社区变得恶意刻薄。

Bad news travels fast, ladies and gentlemen,

女士们，先生们， 坏事传千里，

bad news travels fast.

不胫而走，迅速传播。

I'm surgical with my budget.

我小心翼翼地规划预算。

I have an Excel sheet.

我有一张电子表格，

I've got to pay all the bills.

上面记录着我要付的账单。

According to my Excel sheet,

根据这张表格，

after I withdrew the 20 dollars from Wells Fargo

如果我从位于温泉路和米申路 拐角处的富国银行

on the corner of Warm Springs and Mission,

提取 20 美金的话，

I was supposed to have 71 dollars left.

那么我的银行账户上 应该还剩 71 美金。

I go to the ATM of Wells Fargo.

我走到富国银行的自动提款机前，

I take out the 20 bucks, I get the receipt.

取了 20 块钱。 拿到提款凭证后，

I look at the bottom, instead of 71 dollars,

我看到凭证底部的数字 不是 71 美元，

it was 00.03.

而是 00.03.

I had 20 dollars, 00.03,

我有 20 美元，外加 00.03.

I had to pay the bills, pay the lawyer,

我要付账单，付律师费，

take care of my family.

我要照顾我的家。

And I swear to you, at that time ...

我发誓，当时……

I mean, honestly, I said: “I have done everything in my power.

我对自己说：“我已尽我所能，

I am exhausted.

现在筋疲力尽。

What can I do with three cents?”

这 3 分钱能有什么用？”

I didn't even get angry, I didn't get upset.

我甚至感觉不到愤怒，毫不沮丧。

I remember this vividly, it was a beautiful Bay Area day,

我清楚地记得，在湾区， 那是美好的一天，

anyone who lives there knows, 4pm, little bit of a windy breeze.

住在那里的人都知道， 下午 4 点，微风习习。

The sun was still there, it was just idyllic.

太阳还没下山，充满田园情调。

And I remember I started laughing, look at the receipt,

我记得，自己看着提款凭证， 开始大笑起来，

and a couple of people behind me

站在我背后的两个人搞不明白，

were trying to figure out what’s wrong with this guy.

前面这个人有什么毛病。

Because I didn’t know what to do, I just chuckled, I had three cents left.

我不知所措，只能暗自发笑， 我只剩下了 3 分钱。

So this is what I did.

我是这样做的。

我拿着 20 美元， 穿过街道，决定挥霍一下。

I took the 20 dollars, went across the street and decided to splurge.

I went to Subway

我去了赛百味，

and had a Subway supersized meal,

要了一份超大餐，

foot-long tuna sandwich with all the workings and avocado.

一英尺长的金枪鱼三明治， 加了所有食材，还有牛油果。

And then I decided to have two chocolate chip cookies.

之后我决定再要两块巧克力曲奇。

Then I went next door and had -- what is a Venti?

然后到隔壁买了一杯…… 是叫 Venti 吗？

What's the largest one at Starbucks?

星巴克最大号的杯子叫什么？

WPR: I think Venti, I don't drink coffee.

惠·彭·罗：好像是 Venti, 不过我不喝咖啡。

WA: Venti caramel frappe with extra caramel drizzle, right?

瓦·阿：Venti 焦糖沙冰， 再多淋上一份焦糖。

And I had now 20 dollars became 10 dollars.

现在，我的 20 美金 变成了 10 美金。

I went home, and I told my grandmother,

我回到家，告诉我祖母，

I said, "I've done everything I possibly could.

“我做了一切我能做的。

There's nothing else I can do.

现在没有什么事是我能做的了。

We have 10 bucks left, I'm sorry."

对不起，我们只剩下了这 10 美金。”

I had some Dal Chawal that night watched a Netflix movie.

那天晚上，我吃了一些米饭， 在 Netflix上看了一部电影。

And I remember, I said this in the book, I let go.

记得我在书里说过， 我就此放手。

There's nothing else I could do.

我已经做不了什么了，

I completely let go.

所以彻底放手。

I said, Allah, whatever happens, Inshallah, I leave it up to you.

我对上帝说：阿拉， 不论发生什么，由你做主。

I've done everything within my powers,

我已竭尽全力，

like, everything I could possibly think of, I've done.

做了我能想到的每一件事。

This is it, like, you want to save me, save me,

就这样了。如果你想救我， 那就救我一命，

you don't want to save me, whatever, I enjoyed my Subway meal.

如果你不想救我， 我至少在赛百味饱餐了一顿。

And I remember, this is really interesting,

我记得，非常有意思的是，

I had the best night's sleep that night that I have ever had in my life.

那天晚上我睡了一个好觉， 那是我一生中最好的一觉。

I remember that sleep to this day.

我至今仍然记忆犹新，

I have prayed for that sleep.

一直企盼能再有那样的好觉。

I felt like I was a baby in my mother's womb.

我觉得，我就像 母亲腹中的一个婴儿。

I tried to wonder why.

我努力思考其中的缘由。

It's because I knew that I did everything within my powers,

那是因为，我已全力以赴，

I exhausted myself, and I let it go.

筋疲力竭，所以只能就此收手。

And then what happened,

然后发生的事是，

somehow, I got a loan and 2,500 bucks came.

不知何故，我得到了一笔 2500 美金的贷款。

And the story continued.

故事未完待续。

And so when you're saying about doing something tangible,

所以，当你谈到做些触手可及的事时，

it's not just me saying that like,

我并不是随便说说，

you have to have some feeling of control and autonomy

你必须觉得自己在这个世界里 有一定的控制力和自主权，

in what is a world where you feel adrift

即便这个世界让你感到飘忽不定，

and the ground is shifting beneath your feet.

大地在你脚下移动。

Those small chores that you take for granted,

那些你习以为常的小事

they'll give you order, some discipline.

是某种纪律，会为你带来秩序。

I’m making that chai. I’m painting this.

沏一壶茶，刷刷油漆，

I’m feeding my children. I took out the trash.

给孩子做做饭，出门倒垃圾。

I did some work today.

我今天做了这些事。

I can control this. I did this with my hands.

这是我可以控制的。 是我亲手完成的。

I'm still alive, right?

我还活着，不是吗？

And then you plot and you do the best you can,

此后，你可以做计划， 然后为实现计划拼尽全力，

and then you let go.

最后你要放手，顺其发展。

And I think those daily chores, that daily routine, that you establish

我认为，你设立的那些日常琐事， 每日例行的杂务，

gives you a sense of rhythm,

可以给你一种节奏感，

at the very least, says,

至少，你可以说，

"The world can take everything, but it won't take this.

“这个世界可以夺走一切， 但是夺不走这些日常小事，

It won't take my delicious cup of chai that I made with my own hands.

它夺不走这杯我亲手沏的， 香甜可口的茶，

It won't take this little plant I plotted outside.

夺不走我在屋外种的一小棵植物，

It won't take my love for my kids.

夺不走我对孩子的爱，

It won't take that from me.

这些都夺不走。

Not today, death, not today."

死亡，你今天休想 从我手里夺走这些。”

So I hope for whoever asked that question, I hope that was hopeful.

不管这个问题是谁提出的， 我都希望这个回答能为你带来希望。

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